Why “I Don’t Care Anymore” Is a Sign of Growth in Your Midlife with Dr. Mindy Pelz (Part 2)

I love when women are like, I don't know, all of a sudden I just can't do that thing anymore that I did for my family. I can't give my career everything. I can't lose myself. There's a woman who basically, like, snapped one day and went to her phone and was like, I'm starting a we do not care club. And she was like, here are all the things I don't care about anymore. And I'm putting the world on notice that I won't be doing those things.

We love her already, right?

And I was like, oh, my God. I can neurochemically explain if that's you. That is normal.

We all know something is happening to us in our right. And we all know anybody who's in their late 30s, early 40, 40s, period, and of course, 50s. But 40s, I think, is just this, like. I think there's this expectation that you're supposed to have it all together and you should feel happy. And all of a sudden, we're all finding ourselves in this position of, like, wait, I don't know if anything I've built is actually, like, working for me.

Yeah. Yeah.

I'm not sure if this. I'm watching a lot of friends go, I'm not sure if this marriage is working.

Yeah.

Leaving a lot of marriages.

Yeah.

Leaving a lot of jobs. Trying to figure out what their new purpose is. Like, it is very much like a time of reassessment.

Yes.

And trying to figure out where you fit again. And I think this is such an empowering conversation because if you know you're meant for leadership, you can also go, where can I go? And step in and use this wisdom that I know.

Exactly.

Yeah.

You just nailed it. And what made me. So why. And this was why I was like, I have to write this book and connect all these dots is that so many women fear becoming invisible.

Totally.

So I used to have women in my clinic. Like, I would ask them their age, and they're like, oh, I'm not going to tell you. And I'm like, okay.

Like, well, that's not going to help me. I know, I know.

I'm like, why? Like, what is going on that makes you not want to, like, because they're so. And they were like career women that didn't want people to know their age because God forbid, they wouldn't be relevant anymore. So. So you've got that. I want to touch on. On the marriage thing because when we put this book together, together, I had a couple collaborative writers and one of the things I kept saying is, I don't want this to be a divorce book.

Right?

We hear so much right now about the Gray divorce. It's. It's like a super popular thing in the Zeitgeist. But what's happening is women are doing exactly what you just said, where they're like, wait a second. I built this life in a certain way, and I don't like that anymore. I don't want the life that I build. I want it to be this way. And I'll use myself as an example. My kids are 25 and 23. Our house was the house that everybody hung out at.

So fun.

So fun, right? And I loved having all the kids around. And the kitchen was always messy.

It's a lot of purpose and identity.

A lot of purpose and identity. When I hit my late 40s, all of a sudden I was like, I can't take the kitchen dirty. I can't take the kids making noise at 10 o' clock at night. Like, I started to change my preferences. And at first I would tell my son my daughter was off to college. I would tell my son and husband, and they were like, I don't know who you are. Like, you used to love having everybody over. I'm like, I don't. I don't love it so much anymore. And so we had to have a discussion about that I can't wake up to the dirty kitchen. We had to have a discussion about that. And then that morphed into, all of a sudden I started craving solitude. And so I had to go to my husband and be like, I think I want to go on vacation by myself. I think I need to go spend a weekend by myself. And he at first was like, what is going on?

Totally.

And I was like, I don't know. I need to do something different because this very extroverted family life that we have is no longer matching me. And so. But we had a conversation around it. And in age, like a girl, I actually wrote an appendix to men, because I think that's the moment that women are like, this marriage doesn't fit anymore. But if we bring our husbands into the conversation and explain why, and if our husbands understand why we're going through this transformation, then all of a sudden a new marriage can. Can emerge from a new version of you.

Yeah, that's so powerful to bring. I mean, thankfully, I learned early on to, like, bring my husband into a lot of things and even family in order for those conversations to work. But a lot of people don't. Don't know how to do that. Especially when you're going through something that feels hard like that.

That's right.

Like you must have felt in the beginning, like, oh my God, why do I need solitude? Like sometimes you're like, do I want to be away from them? Is that because we're not, you know, meshing anymore? Are we not interested in each other again? This is so powerful and important because all of a sudden people could be throwing things away that if you just have some hard conversations around them, it's could be be even more beautiful on the other side.

Yeah. You know, it's interesting. Two of my closest friends left their marriages during this time, and I spent a lot of time with them, wonder asking them and trying to understand why. And both of them said, if my husband had understood what I was going through, I didn't want to leave. But I was changing. And in that change, he wasn't happy about that. He liked the over old version. He liked the way our marriage was, but the marriage didn't fit me anymore.

Yeah.

So you have on one level that what my husband and I have done is I started looking at Julie Gottman's work and I started looking at Esther, Esther Perel's work. And Esther says something that really hit me. She said, most adults will fall in love with two to three people in their adult life. Some that will be with two to three different people and others that will be two to will be with the same person. And so my husband and I started calling the marriage we had before kids marriage 1.0. We're like, marriage with kids is marriage 2.0. And the version that we're creating as empty nesters now is marriage 3.0. So instead of leaving the marriage, I. I've been like, can we reinvent this where it fits now better for the person I've become? And when I wrote Age like a girl, I actually isolated myself. I got a Airbnb in Santa Cruz, California, and for four months I lived by myself writing this book. It was so enjoyable. I have never had that much time to myself. Took a little bit of convincing to let my husband know, I'm not leaving you. I'm just needing to go in and anchor to myself and find myself.

Yeah.

And honestly, the marriage is better because of that micro break like that for sure.

And you probably just got to like. I mean, you get to like dig so deeply into something that feels you're so passionate about, know that needs to come out. And I feel like sometimes when we get interruptions of that and if people don't understand, you don't even mean to get resentful of things. Yeah, but if we're not doing what you're saying, where you're like, actually taking, like standing up for yourself and doing the things that you want after years and years of probably living for other people.

That's right.

I think this time exactly what you're saying is it's just going to amplify what's not working if you don't start standing up for yourself. So, like, having these hard conversations that aren't hard once you start having them, and they become regular things. So let's kind of tell me what you're finding with women right now, who you're giving this information to. It's like, hey, you are changing. You're actually getting more powerful. You are like, you know, you're going to stop people pleasing. How do we not go and, like, blow up our lives with this information and just kind of start informing maybe people around us and. And start integrating our desires back into our life?

Yeah. Oh, it's such a good question. So let me, Let me try to break it down. So I think the first thing that women have to understand is that we have been conditioned by, and for lack of better words, I'm just going to say a patriarchal culture. And by patriarch, I mean power over. So in the book, I quote a feminist psychologist who started to look at girls in the 80s, and she wanted to see when girls started to pull away from their authentic voice. And what she found is if she asked a girl and a boy a very specific question at 9, and that the boy and the girl will tell you exactly what they want. Let's use the example of food. If you ask a boy and a girl at nine, what do you want to eat? They both will tell you. If you ask them both at 11, the boy will tell you. But the girl might. Might waver a little bit by the time puberty hits and she's 13, you ask that same question. The boy will tell you exactly what he wants, and the girl will say, I don't know. What are you eating? And what Carol Gilligan discovered was that the culture started to train girls, especially around those teenage years when estrogen is coming in, that you are worthy when you are selfless, when you give your power and you're over to other people, when you do what other people want, not what you want. This tracks, right? Thank you.

Does that track?

Oh, yeah. When I first learned.

I know the exact ages.

Yeah. When I first learned about Carol's work. I was like, oh, my God. I was a teenager and I was the kid. I was who she was studying. Exactly. She asked me what I wanted to eat. I couldn't tell her. Yeah, exactly. But I started to look at my own. My own teenage years and realizing that there was this real switch from who I was as a girl, which is why age, like, a girl is a really cool. I mean, we. We called it that because it's like, a girl is my brand.

Yeah.

But really, what I'm hoping people do is understand who they were before puberty hit, so. And then when I became a teenager, I started doing everything for love that every adult wanted, the boys wanted. You know, anybody around me, if they said, you should act or perform this way and you will be, they don't say it in the sense that you'll be loved. We start wrapping.

We pick up on that, right?

For sure.

Yes.

Like, we wrap ourselves up and we're like, you know, if I'm a certain size, if I don't ruffle anybody's feathers, if I, you know, am constantly pleasing you, will you love me? Mm. And I think we have different degrees of that. So the first thing is we have to understand we've been conditioned to be worthy when we serve everybody else but ourselves. And that happened when estrogen came in. When estrogen goes away, we all of a sudden don't have those same desire to start to please everybody else. You said it when we sat down. I love when women are like, I don't know, all of a sudden, I just can't do that thing anymore that I did for my family or I can't give my career everything. I can't lose myself to my career. I actually have to have a personal life now, or family dynamics change, where all of a sudden you're like, I'm not going to let my sibling run over me anymore. I'm going to actually start to speak up for myself. So the first thing to understand is that is normal. Have you seen the We Do Not Care club that is, like, all over social media?

No, I haven't seen it.

So there's one woman now.

I'll see it now that.

Yeah, you'll see it. Yeah, probably our phones.

Exactly.

There's a woman who basically, like, snapped one day and went to her phone and was like, I'm starting a We Do Not Care club. And she was like, here are all the things I don't care about anymore. And I'm just putting the. She. She literally says, I'm putting the world on notice that I won't be doing those things.

We love her already, right?

Exactly. And I was, oh my God. I can neurochemically explain that. So we. What I hope all the women that are listening is, if that's you, that is normal. And we have to open this conversation up that you were meant to drop the exhausting people pleasing ways. You were meant to start to live for yourself and not for everybody else. That is what's going on. The brain rewirement that's happening during this time is setting you up for freedom and you finally get to stand and speak your truth. Now, that might not work so well in a marriage. What happens to your career? I mean, that's why we have to have conversations about this. And we need to bring this to the forefront so that we can start to see, oh, that woman is doing that because she's neurochemically shifted through this menopausal journey, not because she's becoming mean or, you know, angry. We don't like our women angry in this culture. So. But what I want women to know is that is normal and you are meant to speak your truth. Now look at like Jane Fonda. Look at, if you start to look at women in their 60s, 70s, and 80s, that that is our most productive years. And you know, Jane Fonda, she's always. She's still out doing amazing things. Yeah. And one of my favorite quotes, and this is not to get political, but Michelle Obama got so much flack when she a couple years ago for not showing up at certain traditional events that an ex first lady would show up at. And everybody was like, oh my God, are you leaving Barack? And she's like, no, I'm actually just doing things for myself now. Mm. So when you start to see this, you start to see that so many women go to the other side of menopause and they start living life on their terms. I feel like it's our get out of free, out of jail free card because our brain no longer can hold back our own opinions because with the loss of estrogen, those neurons pruned away that kept you in people pleasing and new neurons are forming that are making you more of an independent thinker.

It's so it's helpful to know because once you know what's going on, I think you can make less kind of snap decisions.

That's right.

You can look at it for what it is and go, okay, well, I can turn the ship. I don't have to just like shed everything immediately. Yeah, you can if you want. For sure. But you have to know there's probably going to be some, like, relational repercussions.

That's right.

Or you can, like, sit down, talk, look at how you could change some different things in your career. I mean, even right now, I've been having. I've been starting to have these conversations. Conversations just on the podcast, because, you know, menopause is perimenopause, and hormones is such a hot topic right now. I'm, like, learning about. Learning about this has been really empowering to me, because if I can kind of see what's coming and start to know it, and I'm already starting to, like, feel these ways of just. You know, I was telling you, telling Mindy when she sat down, like, I just am feeling this very. Almost like this very audacious version of me that is, like, so opposite of who I used to be. Like, oh, I wouldn't have. You know, I will dress the way I think will keep me in. Like, in. In the tribe, and I will speak the way that will keep me in, and I will talk about God in the way that will keep me in. Or not talk about God in the way that, like, it's just all of the things that I actually stood for, it was like, nope, we'll keep it all in a closet until I know what is safe, and no one's gonna know anything.

Bingo.

And I think learning about all of these things now lets me go. Okay. If I know this is, like, how I'm starting to feel and what's coming, I want to start kind of, like, turning the ship of my career.

Yeah.

How would I start really looking at assessing when I'm in these different. Like, at these different events? Do I still belong here? Do I still being, like, fudge that event? Those girls are like. Like, that's not. There's. There's phases for all of these different things. And I think it's like, that's maybe the. The wisdom that comes from it is going, wow, there are. There are such beautiful phases to life, and if we can understand the ones we're in, yes, you can make the most of it.

That. That is so well said. And thank you for transparency, too. And this is one thing I'm trying to do with this book is we all need to share this journey with each other, because then it normalizes it totally.

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What you just described as, and I'm just going to call it the menstruating version of you, even though I know you still have a cycle. But let's go back to like when we were actively, you're, you're probably at your age consider considered perimenopausal. So. But we, estrogen kept us tethered to people pleasing it really. Like, it's that simple. It kept us tethered to having to outsource who we were authentically meant to be. And when estrogen goes away, we start to see glimmers of ourself and what, who we are meant to be. And that is really scary because how do you create that conversation in your family, your marriage, your work? You have to recognize yourself first, which, if I look at where you're at now that you know this, when you start to do behaviors that might seem unusual for your husband, instead of that creating a fight, now what you can say is like, look, I'm getting deeper into menopause. And menopause is this moment where I'm starting to really understand what I want, not what everybody else wanted for me.

Yeah.

And that is a much better conversation in a loving relationship than the, you know, couples fighting and going, you used to do this and now you don't do that. So we have to understand that you're literally hearing your authentic voice as you move into this and who you really want to be before we started pleasing the culture, which you guys, this is.

So when I, when I think of what I remember, like 10 years ago I wrote a post. Maybe what was it, 10 years ago? Maybe it was seven years ago. But I, I had written, I'd like sat down and I'm like, I feel like I need to tell people this. It was like this moment where looking back, I was so young, like, but had this, like, to me, that felt still like a very young age looking back. But at the moment it felt old and I felt like I was starting to be like, looked over by society and especially coming from the background I came from in fitness and I was a cover model and like, you know, that you're very tied to your badge. And so, like, breaking that. And I knew I would need to break that. It's kind of like, I was very aware of, like, yeah, you're going to need to find a lot more purpose than this or you're going to have a very rough, like, experience in your life. And so built up a lot of purpose, but still had this moment of, like, wow. I feel like as you get into your late 30s, there is, like, this conversation around.

Women start to, like, age out.

Like that. That saying of, like, oh, you're aged out. Or some people start commenting that, and you're like, what does that mean? Like, oh, you're done.

Right?

You're done.

Right?

And I had a moment of feeling done for a second, and then I, you know, like, just started really digging really deep about, like, wait, what. What is all this wisdom that we do have? And I think that this is so important for women to understand that that wisdom is literally just getting started in your house.

Exactly. That's exactly.

You can't even access it all that.

Right. That's so well said. Like, if you're. If. And this is why when we look at perimenopause, we talk about the brain fog and the irritability and the rage. Yes. Part of that is hormone replacement therapy might be what you need, but it's not. Don't lose the moment there, because your rage might be that you're really angry because you have not been able to stand in your own power. You haven't been able to speak your own truth. Or, like, you. Where you were, like, in a culture that you got paid for how you look.

Yep.

And so now you're like, I don't want to play that game anymore. But then you're left without an identity, which is huge. And so then the rage shows up, the resentment shows up, the irritability shows up, until we have conversations about, wait a second, that was supposed to happen. You are now moving into the next phase of your life where you get to finally think and behave the way you want to behave. I. I had a really cool. Well, it wasn't cool in the moment.

But it's always cool later, though.

It's always the best thing.

Later in the moment, you're like, oh, God.

Yeah. So I tell the story in the book. I was living in the Palisades when the fires hit, and I grew up in Malibu, and I had raised my family and had my practice in Northern California, and I had moved back to LA and was gonna make that my home. Now my husband and I were gonna, we were looking at, you know, maybe halftime living in Northern California, halftime in la. And I was already really exhausted from launching Fast like a Girl and Eat Like a Girl. And I just wanted to kind of settle into the Palisades home and write and just chill out for a while. And then the, the fires hit and I evacuated the Palisades. The morning of the fires, with Sunset Boulevard completely on fire. I don't know if you saw all the pieces of the news, but palm trees were on fire, falling on top of cars. I was in that mess.

Wow.

And then I got to a hotel in Santa Monica and five hours later I had to evacuate from there. And then the next day I went to Lisa Billyeu's house in West Hollywood Hills and we had to evacuate from there. So 3,648 hours of running from fire. And I broke. And at the same time, and this is, this is what we do as women at the same time, I was leading 100,000 people through a three day water fast.

Oh my God.

So I had people all over the world in the middle of a water fast. So here I am literally leaving my canyon with everything on fire, and I'm saying to my husband, I just need to get to a parking lot so that I can lead. I'll get on the call in an hour. And wow. He's like, honey, you need to get safe. You'll handle the call.

Oh my God.

But it's like, but that's.

Yeah.

Isn't that what we do as type A women? We're like, I'm sorry, I might be.

Like, like my world's on fire.

Yeah.

But let me make sure you guys are all good.

Exactly.

Yeah.

So I missed the call that day, but then I it. That was a Tuesday. And then Wednesday and Thursday I let everybody through. I was at Lisa's house. And on Friday when the last call happened, I said to this group of a hundred thousand people, I was like, I'm just going to be really honest with you all. I'm not okay. And I have not been okay for a really long time. I'm completely burnt out. I can't find myself. And what I want you to know is I don't want you all to worry about me because I'll find okay, but I just need to publicly announce I'm not okay. And I feel like a lot of women are like that. Why don't you put in the chat if you feel like you're not okay? Oh my God. Oh, wow. The chat Just blew up. And so many women were like, I'm not okay. I'm not okay. Thank you for giving me permission to say I'm not okay.

Makes me want to cry.

It was so freeing. And then you know what I did? I actually called my parents the next day, who I have on a pedestal, and I'm still wanting to please. And I was like, hey, y', all, I need you to know I'm not okay. And. But don't worry about me. I'm gonna. I'm gonna find okay, but I need to start to heal myself now. And then I went to my adult children and I called both of them independently, and I'm like, I just want you to know I'm not okay. But I'm gonna find okay. I'm gonna isolate myself for a while. I need to heal myself. And you know what my son said to me? He was 21, and he said, you know what you need, Mom? You need a reset. I was like, I do. I do.

Really do. You got plans?

Yeah. What is it? But my point in sharing the story is there was something about, like, I need to put down the facade that I've got it all handled.

Yeah.

And that's what happens to us when we go through this menopausal experience, is we're being given the opportunity to put that down and to say, I'm actually going to live life by my rules now. And when we look at the suicide rates, I think that happened to those women when they went to kill themselves. They didn't know the door out, and they were feeling like they couldn't put the mask on anymore. And when I look at the divorce rates, I think a lot of women enter in merit into marriage with one version of them, but somewhere down the marriage line, they're a different version now. And that's why this book is so important to me, is we have to bring these conversations out and allow women to change. We let teenagers change.

Yeah.

Like, you know, a girl goes from, like a 10 year old and she's like your best friend, and then at 14, you look at her wrong and she wants to, you know, walk out of the room and we go, oh, that's. You know, that's part of the teenage process. But we don't give menopausal women the same grace.

Okay. I hope this book sells millions and millions and millions, because imagine what would happen if women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s actually started speaking more wisdom. Like, found it.

Yep.

Like, you need to bring. Okay idea. You need to literally start A Like a grandma tribe, but we. You can join it as soon as you're 40.

That's a great idea.

The only problem is a baby grandma.

Yeah, a baby grandma. Because a lot of people, we really wrestled with the grandmother hypothesis because a lot of, you know, there's a real trend for women to not have kids right now.

And I don't have kids. I'll be a grandma.

Right, right. And a lot of others. Yeah, yeah. So I, you know, we played with different. Different versions. I share in the book. I studied Clarissa Pinkola Estes work, and she wrote Women who Run with the Wolves. And she wrote another book called Dangerous Women, which is one of my favorite. And she has a concept called the Crone. And so many of us think of the Crone as, like, you're old and you're ugly, and you're, like, witchy, and you could push you away. But actually, what crone means is crown. And so it's like, this is a time to put our crown on and actually to stand up and be who we really want to be. And I agree. We need to come together in that and give each other permission to change and lift each other up. I share in the book that when I went through this transformation, a lot of my friends are five and 10 years older than me, and it was so disorienting to feel like my identity as a human was changing. And when I went to my friends who were older than me, the most helpful statements they made were, mindy, this is your initiation into you. I can't tell you how. Wow. It's powerful. It's an amazing friend. And they were like, I can't tell you how to do it, but I can stand next to you as you do it and support you through the process. So if we create a grandmother tribe, that's what I envision. This is like, all women coming together and letting each other experience the transformation into the most authentic version of ourselves. And. And that, to me, I mean, a billion women right now are in menopause. A billion women. Like, imagine if a billion women stood up and finally told their truth. Like, what would the world look like if we were truly, authentically true to ourselves? It's. It's. Blows my mind.

It does blow my mind. Well, I feel like you're gonna start cracking some stuff open here.

I hope so.

Exciting.

Yeah. And I. And I. I always say, like, you know, a great question to ask an author is, why do you write a book? And for me, I write a book to open conversations. So with fascicle girl. We opened the conversation up of, wait, what else should women be cycling? I started to watch that happen. People were like, oh, should I cycle my biohacks? Should I cycle my supplements? What else should I cycle?

Yeah.

And with age, like a girl, I really want to open up this idea of, like, this is our opportunity to be who we always wanted to be. And what does that look like? And how does that affect marriages? And, you know, I know you have a big entrepreneurial following. Like, how does that affect our work ethic? I don't know if you see this in your community, but I know for me, I'm not interested in working seven days a week anymore.

No, I definitely see that.

Like, but as an entrepreneur.

Right.

We just sign up for Monday through Friday.

Totally. I see a huge shift in women going, okay, I gotta figure out how to work when I feel better. When you feel good.

That's right.

I know you can't just work when you're motivated, but starting to think, like, when. When does this really work for me?

Right.

To get the best work out of you.

Yeah. And when you're in your 40s, you're got, like, getting glimmers of this. But here's the great news is when you get like, I'm 56, and I've been postmenopausal for three years. And each year I go deeper and deeper into it, it gets easier and easier to stand up for myself. I literally just had this conversation with my husband yesterday, who's CEO of our business, and I said, here's what I'll tell you. I'm willing to give the business four more weeks launching this book into the world, working seven days a week, getting on planes and doing interviews like this, which are enjoyable, but they take you away. Take a lot. They take a lot out of you. And when I come home, starting in January, after the book has been released, I'm going back to working two days a week so that the rest of the time, I can finally do what I want to do. I've given myself over to my practice. I've given myself over to my marriage, to my family, to my family of origin. Like, I have been a great steward of all those things at the expense of myself. And I'm like, now I'm not doing that anymore. And that feels natural to say. Yeah. And I think many women would say that. And I hear you sort of at the beginnings of the rumblings of that.

Totally. And I think having the realization, too, that, like, you're gonna tap out and burnout and you won't get, you know, I'm watching you. You created three books in a shorter period of time, but you will have to, like, going away and taking time is the only way to access more creativity and access more wisdom. Like doing. Getting burnt out or, you know, doing all the things that everyone else wants you to do. It's like it cuts off the wisdom from everything.

Yes. Julie Gottman, I was sitting with her in a, in a meeting back in, in April, and we were talking about resentment and she said, in a marriage. And I think this applies to our businesses as well. We become resentful when we say yes to the things we really want to say.

Oh, yeah, right. Oh, yeah.

And think about that with our own businesses is that we say yes because we're like, I got to do it for the business, I got to do it for the growth. But then we actually become resentful for our own career. And so that's what starts to shift as we go into the. Our post menopausal years. And hopefully with this new wisdom that we're all gaining from books like mine. And I mean, there's a lot of great books out there sort of speaking this truth right now is that we can actually reinvent ourselves and our businesses to work for us and work smarter, not harder, and actually talk about the things we want to talk about and talk about the things that light us up, not what the algorithm wants us to talk about.

Free yourself. Yes, Free yourself and free your energy.

Exactly.

Be with the people you want to be with, the things you want to do. Yeah, it's very possible. It just takes those conversations. And I mean, I think awareness is where it all begins. And I think that's what you're, You're. Well, I know that's what you're doing with this book. So I'm so excited. I'm so excited for everyone to read it so we can get it where all books are sold.

Yep. You can get it anywhere. It'll be, it'll. It'll be on out and about in the world.

Age like a girl.

Yep.

And I will put everything in the show notes for you guys. All you have to do is just scroll down on this and you can see all of the things and we'll connect where to follow you and all that fun stuff too. So thank you so much for coming on again.

Thank you. Lori. I love talking to you.

Oh, I always, I always love your energy and you're so much fun and energetic and hilarious and it's just like such a good conversation. With you, so thank you so much.

Yeah. Thank you. You know, it's funny because as my little girl was ridiculed for her humor, and now I get to use it to my advantage. There's a classic example of, like, how many of us were, like, shamed for some behavior, and. And so I smile when you say that. So thank you. Humor's the best.

It's my favorite. It's my favorite thing.

Exactly. Thank you. Appreciate you.