I wanted to be a good disciple

So when I think about my call to ministry, you know, I took that cue from my parents and loved serving in the church, so became a leader in my youth ministry. And even as a senior, when we lost the youth pastor that. That I had grown up under for about three and a half years, I was. They put me on the search committee for the next youth pastor. You know, they wanted a teen representative. And now all the while, I was also struggling with private sin and hating myself and not knowing how to walk in freedom. So that's part of my story, too. But outwardly, I knew how to act in church, and I knew, and I love the Lord. I don't want to diminish that. I wanted to be obedient. I wanted to be a good disciple. I wanted to follow Jesus and glorify God with my life. I just didn't know how to do that all the time. So, you know. But I'd grown up in church, and I knew how to talk the talk. It was just a struggle sometimes to walk the walk, as we said back then.