Best of: Audio Porn w/ Caroline Spiegel

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We'Re called audio porn. So people kind of put us as like this little niche for audio lovers or for people who don't like visual porn. But what I'm trying to get across is that this is totally for everybody. It's not just for, you know, people who hate visual porn. It's for people who want more out of their porn experience, period.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily, and I'm here to help you prioritize your pleasure and liberate the conversation around sex. Audio porn is one of the most brilliant sex tech innovations of the past few years. It's immersive, it's discreet, it's super intimate, it's hot. You literally feel like you're in the room with people who are having sex. But you don't really have to get involved. You just listen to it and it's a turn on. Plus, it's a great way to ratchet up your own dirty talk or your masturbation routine. So on today's best of episode, I'm sharing my conversation with Caroline Spiegel, creator of Quinn, an audio erotica app that was one of the first to market. We talk about audio porn and solo sex, how to use audio erotica with a partner and a Spielberg special bonus. Carol and I listened to some audio erotica together, including a guided masturbation clip. Plus, we take your questions like enjoying porn as a blind individual, how to embrace a naturally sexy voice, and wild card. Can you really be allergic to semen? Well, find out all of this on today's show, Intentions with Emily. For each episode. Join me in setting an intention for the show. So what do you want to get out of the episode? My intention is to show you a new way to connect to your fantasies and erotic desires through a medium like audio erotica. Please rate and review Sex with Emily wherever you listen. My new article, how do I explore bisexuality while in a Relationship? Is up@sexwithemily.com also check out my YouTube channel for more sex tips and advice. If you want to ask me a question, leave me your questions or Message me at sex with emily.com sl Ask Emily or call my hotline 559-TALK-SEX or 559-825-5739. Always include your name, your age, where you live and how you listen to the show. And you can totally change your name if you want to remain anonymous. All right everyone, enjoy this episode.

Foreign.

Before we get into this episode, I just want to remind everyone that this is a throwback episode. So you may hear me using women and men as I started primarily using vulva and penis odors after this episode was initially recorded. Also, when we first recorded this episode, Triquen was just available through their website, but now they have an app as well. So now you can try Quin for yourself through their website or or the app. Caroline Spiegel is the founder and CEO of the amazing audio erotica platform Try Quinn. Find more Caroline on Instagram and Twitter at Caro Spiegel. Learn more about triquen@triquen.com or download try Quinn wherever you get your apps. So, okay, I want to hear like, because I gotta be honest, I have thought about this in my mind, I thought, and even once a few years ago, I was like, I wanted to masturbate or something. And I was like, you know, why isn't there erotica that we could listen to? Because that's just for women too. Like, I'm just hearing the words. It seems easier. And then you invented it.

So basically everyone's like, what is audio porn? You know, it's kind of confusing. Is it a Podcast isn't an audiobook. What is it? But basically what it is, it's. It takes many forms. So it could be a guided masturbation. It could be an erotic story that's sort of told interactively. It could be just overheard sex sounds. It takes all these different forms. The one thing that all these different forms of audio porn have in common is that it really invites you in, and it makes you feel like you are in the room with. With the person having sex with them.

It does.

So it's so immersive. And that's the one thing I would say it's true.

Can we play some?

Absolutely.

Okay. Which we like Harry. He's popular, right? Like, Harry could talk to me about his trip to FedEx, and I would probably have an orgasm.

Yeah. Harry could, like, host a cooking show, and people would be just coming everywhere, like, constantly.

Okay, let's play Harry. Okay.

Mm. Your pussy's dripping wet now.

Mind if I slip a finger in there while I'm licking your clit?

Mm, I thought not.

You're gonna love this.

All right, Harry.

Okay, let's go.

So I was. It's interesting. Interesting enough. Cause that was in the New York Times piece about how Harry. It's the British voice. Right.

Accent is one of our most popular tags. Absolutely. Accent is right up there. British accent, Australian accent, French accent. All over the board. Yeah.

So what are you finding? That people are search.

So lesbian is our most searched term, which is. We talked about this. It's very similar to visual porn. Also. We get other things that are, you know, unique to audio porn. So things like male voice, female voice, M for F, which means male for female, male for trans female, or things like that, which are, like, unique tags. Who's speaking and who is the listener intended to be. We also have written content, and that's sort of meant to be, you know, a little pregame for the main show, which is the audio porn. But couples love using the written material together. You could read it before bedtime, before sexy time.

I love that. I had a boyfriend once, and he. We would read erotica, like, in the bathtub, and it was so sexy.

That's, like, amazing.

I know, right? I was like, probably, you're. I think I was like, probably, like, 24. And I was like, it was. It was his idea to sit in the bathtub. I'll never forget that. It was so seductive. And it was, like, such a turn on. And it wasn't like he just came home, was trying to have sex. It was like he was really, like, working with the arousal, and we were both turned on. So I just love this idea because it's something that it's just really been missing. Like, there's more of a storyline or a plot, perhaps the radica, if you're into that. Right. Yeah. Do you find that?

Totally. And I think what's hard is we're called audio porn. So people kind of put us as, like, this little niche for audio lovers or for people who, you know, don't like visual porn. But what I'm trying to get across is that this is totally for everybody. And that's something I love about your podcast, is I feel like I recommend your podcast to everybody. And this is also this case with audio porn. It's not just for, you know, people who hate visual porn. It's for people who want more out of their porn experience, period.

We had a caller, and I might have told you this because we first met in New York. I was like, I'm so in on this. Caroline and I had lunch, and I was like. We had a caller who was like, he wrote his wife, I think, or his girlfriend. He wrote down exactly what he wanted, like, his fantasy, because they were having problems communicating. And he wrote it out. And then he came home one time, and she, like, lived. Like, it was like, he's like, you're sitting by the piano. You're wearing that black negligee. And, like, it was like. Then they would write back and forth to each other, and I was like, that is so sexy. And I think that talking dirty and hearing the words is just a really part of sex. That and erotica of everything. The sensual experience that we're missing. So I think you're really hitting a sweet spot here.

And it communicates, you know, like, intimacy, passion, mystery, buildup, all those things that sometimes are missing in visual porn. You're like, I want those parts of sex that really get me going. Exactly. You know, all those other elements.

Are there certain, like, plot lines, though, or stories that have been popular?

Totally. Friends to Lovers is a big one. So, you know, you have the best friends. They're eating Chinese food on the couch, and then one thing leads to another.

Yeah, exactly. Right.

Or you might have co workers is really popular. Another classic kind of audio porn thing is leaving your boyfriend a message at work or, like, calling someone at work because it's super naughty. You know, don't call the work phone. Yeah. That sort of thing. And then we also have just a lot of audios about couples trying new things. And I think that's awesome because you can listen to that, and you can immediately use it in your own sex life.

Like, give me an example.

A couple is having sex. People are having sex, and the guy, I think he maybe calls the girl baby girl or little girl, or maybe she calls him Daddy. And all of a sudden, things get really hot and heavy, and they're like, oh, my God, we've just realized that we have this kind of interest in daddy play, sort of, and they're talking.

It through in real, so it's kind of reality audio erotica. Like, in the moment, they discover that they're both into it.

Right, Exactly. And then there's a series that goes on where they get more and more into the kind of daddy kink, if you will.

Oh, wow.

So it's really cool to watch that evolve and watch it get hotter and hotter.

Oh, what's that one called? Now I want to go listen to what I'm doing at 7:01 tonight.

I'm pretty sure it's Hank Miller, one of our creators, but I have to check on that.

We can find it and we can, like, tweet it out later. I think that's amazing. Okay, so we have Dylan from Pennsylvania 32. Wants to talk about Quinn.

Hey, Dylan.

Hey, Dylan. What's up? Hey.

How are you?

We're good. Okay.

So I'm completely blind.

Okay.

This is absolutely incredible. And I cannot wait to share this with all my crazy blind people.

Dylan, this is amazing. Okay.

So looking forward to it. So it's just.

It's.

I don't know.

It's not as.

I. This is a new thing to me. Like, a bunch of stuff went on with my body, so I saw for the first 25 years of my life. So it's a lot different when you can't see it and things are just happening. It's. It ruins the. I don't know. To some degree. There's a little bit of realism about it.

Yeah.

You can see it, right?

No, I get it here.

It just becomes very cartoon.

Yeah, No, I understand that, Dylan.

Well, I'm going to share this with my crazy blind people.

Okay.

I'm so just in love with the show, and you're doing amazing things.

Thank you, Dylan.

Thank you for calling.

I love this. That feels good, you know?

Amazing.

Can't even imagine all the people it's going to help. Because I got to be honest, when I was looking for audio erotica before, it existed before Quint. No, I was like, I just. I just don't want to see porn, but I want to get Turned on. I want to masturbate. And it's like everyone's listening to things now anyway. Podcasts are huge. People listen to radio. Just plug in some erotica.

You can just close your eyes, let your imagination take over. It's like a mix between visual porn and just straight. Your imagination. Because I don't know if you've had this experience when you're using just your imagination. It's too hard. Like you just can't.

It's so much work.

So much work.

I mean, all day I'm thinking. I just don't want to think. But I also can't. It's really hard for me to find porn often that I really like. We have ann, and she's 47 in California. Tell me, Ann, what's going on? You have a sexy voice.

You say, hi, ladies.

Hi.

Oh, Ann.

Hi, Ann.

Hi. How are you guys today?

Good, thanks.

I get in trouble because of my voice.

Okay.

I get told it sounds so dirty, and then people don't take me seriously. How do I get them to take seriously when I sound like a porn star and I'm not one?

Well, and okay, this is so in your 47 years old. So you've been dealing with this for a lifetime, right?

I have.

Okay.

And I am a very sexual woman, so, I mean, I do talk dirty on the phone. I'm not afraid to use it, but when can it stop?

Well, and I got a question for you, because at 47, I feel like. Like who. Who's not taking you seriously still?

Well, my co workers. Because when I have to talk to people, I end up. I work with a lot of men, so they end up talking to my tits instead of talking to my face.

Okay.

The voice kind of thing, does that make sense?

Yeah, no, that totally makes sense. And I. I just feel.

I don't know, Ann, like, what do you. What do you do for work?

I work in construction.

Okay. Yeah. I mean.

And I've considered doing, like, the phone. The phone voice thing before because I've been told that it's a little nutty, but I just don't know how to even go about getting into it.

I would say turn this weakness into a strength and try. Quinn.

Yeah. Thanks, Ann. Thanks.

Yeah, I think maybe that might work.

I'm seriously. And you sound amazing. Getting turned on. Sorry. No, but. And I get it. It's a problem, but I feel like at our age.

Not to make light of this, Anne.

Not to make light of it and. But you're just. Everyone's driving off the road Right now. But anyway, Ann, I get it, but I feel like at your age, you know, you have a job, people are not taking you seriously. I just feel like then if you're. You still have your job, you're doing well. Those aren't the people that you want to deal with. I just feel like with confidence and being a woman in this world, we got to deal with that a lot and just keep doing you. I mean, that's. That's all I can say or find new people to work with.

So should I embrace the voice?

Yes. Yeah. And we're going to. Thank you for calling, Ann. I appreciate it. Let's talk. Okay. So how can people, if they want to be part of the app?

Totally. So it's super simple.

I keep calling it app. The website.

It's a website right now. Yeah, we have plans for now.

Right.

But yeah, for right now it's a website. So you can do is you can go to try quinn.com, you can make a profile and you can make a little avatar. Your username, your bio, and you can upload content directly to the site. So you can upload your first sturdy audio with a little description. Tag it, make sure to tag it appropriately so no one gets surprised by anything and wait for the likes to pour in.

That's really. So people can just. Anyone could submit it, but it has to go through a process. Right, Right.

So we have content guidelines and community guidelines. So if your content doesn't meet those guidelines, it will be taken down.

So you started this how long ago? Because you just launched again or relaunched.

Yeah.

But what have you learned? Like, what has surprised you in working in this industry?

Wow.

So many things. I think I had no idea how much goes into making an erotic audio. So I am just blown away when I talk to some of these creators about what they do. They are artists, like complete actors and artists that really know this craft and know their audiences. And it is no joke. I mean, just like you can imagine like a porn set with all the cameras and the lights and everything. Making an erotic audio is really hard and they've been doing it for years in kind of these other communities. So it's like really interesting.

So you can't just like talk into your phone really, or can you use your phone? You have to get an audio studio to do it or.

No, you can totally do it on your phone and amateurs can totally do it. Like I was just describing uploading it. But also there are these people that you'll find on Quinn who have been doing it for Years who are super, super good. And I just thought I'd mention that it was super surprising to find out that there are some people who take it like crazy seriously and do it like an art.

I see what you're saying. No, I got caught up in the story. But you're right. I can see that. Like, it's their craft. It's their. And they're probably so grateful to have a place to go.

Absolutely.

People are listening and have an audience. You know what I also like about it? I feel like I get so many calls from people who are like, how do I talk dirty? How do I sext? How do I have phone sex? All those things. Because I think it's a new language you've developed, and I feel like in listening to this, you would learn that as well.

Oh, my God. We get that all the time. And personally, I felt that in my life that my dirty talk has improved, like, a million times over. Like, it's crazy, because when you're listening to these audios, it just naturally goes into your brain, like, oh, okay. When I want to say a little bit rougher. What are other ways to say that? And what are other ways to say a little bit harder, like this or like that? And it's just a million different new vocabulary words that sound actually pretty hot and pretty easy to use.

How has it helped your life, your sex life?

So I was actually talking to my boyfriend Daniel, before I went on this show about what I was gonna say if this question came up. But we actually love using Quinn together. It's amazing for couples, and we tell all of our friends to use it. So fun to read a story together or to listen to an audio together. And like I just mentioned, it helps dirty talk so much.

Okay, so you guys just, like, let's listen to this tonight. And you're like, it'll turn you on. I love. And you can search by, like, different fantasies and stuff like that.

Yeah, you can filter by different fantasies by a girl's voice, boy's voice, whatever.

You want and you feel and it's in. The audience is all ages.

Men and women, men and women. Our audience is actually 50% men, 50% women.

How could people use this to improve their sex life, do you think? Because I always, like, tell people the yes, no, maybe list if they want to find what they like. But you could figure out, like, turn ons or fetishes or kinks that maybe you didn't know you had.

Okay. So another thing I always say is because it's so immersive you actually get a taste of what some of these sexual experiences are like. So for example, you could try a threesome audio or you could try being with a girl for the first time via audio. And it's actually a great way to explore your sexuality. Or for example, I listened to male on male sex for the first time on Quinn and it was really interesting and erotic for me in a way I'd never expected.

Yeah.

And so you can just really experience all this different variety in a way that's so immersive and sort of like a, a great kind of intro into different sexual experiences.

It's true. It's such a good point. And it's something about audio that I've always preferred audio. I don't watch a lot of TV either. So I'm just like, I'm trying to watch tv, that's one of my goals. But really I know I'm the only one who like literally, you should see my calendar. I go home, I was just like, watch this, watch that. But something about audio, I just, I don't know, it's so soothing to me. So I love the idea of being able to kind of flip through different things and just see what turns you on and maybe and what you're interested in and that. It's like a whole new menu.

Oh my God. And these guided masturbations, it's so good.

Wait, now I want to play guided masturbation.

Harry has a guided masturbation that is so good. It's called the three gates. He walks you through like apparently three different types of orgasms. I don't know if anyone actually orgasms three times during it, but even if it's once.

Okay, we're gonna play a clip of this real quick. Hey, Harry.

So.

I've been doing a bit of research recently about, well, sex.

Especially on how best to please a woman.

And I was hoping to try out some of what I've learned on you.

So apparently a woman can have three types of orgasm.

He's my dream man.

Each one more powerful and intense than the rest.

Oh my God. I'm gonna have to leave for the.

Rest of the show.

I experienced in sequence. So the second can be had once the first is achieved.

Wow.

The third can be had once the second is achieved.

Look, I don't know how true this is, but it's fine.

Wait, so here's my question. So wait, I friggin love that it's a guided masturbation. I feel like for women, I often have to remind more women than men that it's important to masturbate, to continue to masturbate throughout your lifetime whether you're in a relationship or not. That could be something that could get you to do it.

And it's like, you know how people have incorporated a meditation routine into their day? I think it's like a similar kind of thing. You just turn on the guided masturbation and you get to orgasm so much more quickly. It's a pleasurable experience for a lot of people. They're not dealing with the graphic imagery that makes them feel icky inside. They're not really sure what's going on. You know, it's just a whole thing.

It's safer. It totally can feel safer. More private and less like affronting.

More intimate. Totally.

It is more intimate. I think it is so smart. And congratulations, Caroline Spiegel. Okay, I'm gonna ask you. So everyone can try. And it's free, right?

It's free.

Okay. Triqueen.com will also put in the show notes@sexwithemily.com and then I'm gonna ask you the five questions we ask all of our guests.

Ready?

Keep us ready. Okay.

Biggest turn on confidence.

Okay. Biggest turnoff.

Bad posture.

Okay. What makes good sex?

Talking.

Something you would tell your younger self about sex and relationships.

Go easy on yourself.

Okay. Number one, sex tip.

Use lube.

I love you, girl. Okay. Thank you so much, Caroline Spiegel, for being here. Check out Quinn. You guys could be your new masturbation partner. Thanks for being here. Let's hear a quick word from our sponsors after the break. I'll be answering your questions.

The first email comes from Ray, 40 in the United States. Dear Dr. Emily, My wife has never liked sex, ever. We've been together 14 years and we often go months or even years without having sex. A few weeks ago, she decided to have sex as a holiday gift for me. Well, she ended up getting a yeast infection and blame me, but I went to the doctor who said, I don't have a penile yeast infection. Now she's like, we'll never have sex again because I'm allergic to your semen. Is this possible? It had been several months since the last time we had sex and she got an infection then too. So this time I made sure to shower right before as I didn't want to risk it again. Thoughts or suggestions? Okay, Ray, thanks for your question. All right. Yes, it is possible that somebody can be allergic to semen, but it's rare and sounds like it's an excuse not to have sex. So first off, I want to make sure that she's gotten checked out because some women do have chronic yeast infections and that is something to talk to the doctor about. Typically it's because of hygiene reasons. It could be that maybe her pants are too tight or she's not changing after working out or something in the environment has changed. You know, soaps that she's using to clean her clothes. But she should definitely get checked out. But the thing that I'm most concerned with is that, you know, it sounds like she just has never really liked sex. And I'm wondering if she ever in her life has enjoyed sex. Has she had any trauma? You know, is she having pain? Have you ever asked her and said, you know what, I just want to know why don't you want to have sex? I mean, just see, and I wouldn't say it that way either. I would just have a talk about how important your intimacy is in the relationship and that you guys need to work together on finding ways to still connect intimately. Now I think in talking to her about this, you know, it's not just like a one time conversation, but maybe she, you know, more will be revealed, like did she have a trauma? Did something happen? Is she holding on to resentments? So we just need to find out more information. But when you do talk to her, you have to make sure that it's a place of curiosity, a place of wanting to work with her on this together. It's not just up to you to make your sex life connective again. So you don't want to judge her or blame her or shame her, even though you're probably feeling not great right now about it, so it's in a neutral environment. I feel bad because when people use sex as like a weapon or using it as like a just on your birthday or just for the holidays, that does not feel great. Couples require sex. So I don't think it's cool for her to just opt out. She can't just say, nope, no more sex, I'm never having sex with you again. Is not something that you can do in a relationship. Just not cool. She herself might not even have the answer to the question why? So I think it's more like, I'm going to make this your problem so I don't really have to look at myself. I think that we do that a lot in our life. We just kind of project, we blame, we shame so we don't have to look at ourselves. So I feel like there's some more work here for her to do and for him to do so. I think after 14 years, it sounds like a good time, too. Therapy would be really helpful if you're not able to move this conversation along on your own, Ray. So thanks for the email. Keep us posted. This is from Haley, 22, in Canada. Hi, Dr. Emily. Thanks for doing the show. I've learned so much. I'm in a very happy relationship. I have a question about whether or not to tell my boyfriend about having a threesome in the past. I had a threesome a few years ago with a good friend of mine and his wife before my boyfriend and I started dating. My boyfriend's friends know that I had the threesome. So I'm wondering if I should tell my boyfriend preemptively so that he hears it from me before one of his friends brings it up. Normally don't like to share my specific past experiences with boyfriends because they usually don't react very well to hearing about it. My boyfriend knows the couple I had sex with as well, so that might create some awkwardness. What do you think? Oh, this is a good question, Haley, because it's really tricky. I have to say. I. I agree with you. Like, I'm not going to just be laying out all my past sexual experiences for partners. And when I do it, it's because we're having a conversation about what we like in bed and what we're really into. So if you do decide to bring it up, I would bring it up in conjunction with a conversation that goes something like, hey, let's talk about our sex life and what we're into, or what are your fantasies? And if it does come up, you could bring up the fact that you've had a threesome and let them know it's with the couple. People do like to kind of share gossip as friends so that it might slip out one time. People have a few drinks and they reveal stuff. But the truth is, you know your boyfriend better than anybody. And I've had partners who get turned on by my past and are like, tell me more. Like, tell me about it when we're having sex. And then I've had guys who are like, oh, so you had a, you know, you did this or you did that, and then they like to kind of use it in a way that isn't healthy. I feel if it's weighing on you and you're with a partner that you want to grow with and learn with sexually, that I would like to be with a partner that could accept my past wholeheartedly, I don't want to Be with anyone who I feel is going to judge me. But also, you're young. You're 22. He might be in a place where he does feel threatened if they're around. So really, I just think you have to kind of give it a little bit more time, have some more questions about your own sexual fantasies and how you guys could kind of really continue to connect sexually and then see if it feels safe. And you want to bring it up, because, again, I'm all for being honest. And I feel like, find out who this guy is, who your partner is. Can he support you? Can he trust you? Hopefully, he'll think it's just hot, but be willing to take the consequences. And again, if someone's not down with who we are and decisions we make, sometimes they might not just be the partner for us. They might not be mature enough to handle the information. So you're gonna have to find that out. Let us know how it goes. Okay. Thanks for the question, Haley. This last email is from Cornell 28, in text. Hello, Dr. Emily. I'm 28. My wife was 29. We've been married for over a year, but I've dated on and off since we were teens. The past few years, I've grown curious about pegging. I have a huge butt fetish and love all things butt play. But my wife doesn't seem to share the same excitement. She lets me sniff and lick and finger her and says she's not opposed to anal. As for me, I've asked to be pegged, but it wasn't at the best time. It was after a fight, but she turned it down quickly, saying it was weird of me to ask. It made her uncomfortable to think about. I guess you can say she's recently made strides. Every now and then, she'll slip a finger in my ass. But I selfishly want it all, rimming and fingering and to be pegged. So how could I bring it up? What can I do to satisfy my desire if it never happens? Thank you, Quenelle, for this question. Okay, I, you know. You know, don't bring it up after an argument. It's so tempting when we're fighting with our partner to be like, and you never peg me, and you never do this for me me. But we can't hear what our partner is saying when we're in a heated debate. So it sounds like she might be open to it. And what I have found is that the conversations are best had when it's in a neutral environment and you're talking about both your Pleasure. You could say to her, what have we been doing this last year or these last few months that's really turned you on? And how can I be a better lover to you? And then you could answer it yourself and say, God, I love when you, you know, put a finger in my ass. It felt great. You could tell her that other things that you would like, like if she licked you as well, you could explain to her what you want. But I have to say this, is that just bringing up pegging to somebody who doesn't have the experience doing it, and maybe she's never even really heard it before. And for those of you who don't know what pegging is, pegging is would mean that his wife would wear a strap on around her waist and it would be attached to a dildo, and then she would penetrate you from behind time. She would be wearing it and penetrate you. So that's what pegging is. So once you have these conversations and again, it's like everything, you can't go from zero to pegging. So to talk about how you're also interested in anal play and then build up to it again, and maybe she needs to see it. Maybe you need to show her some porn with pegging in it. Maybe you need to show her some images. I mean, again, I feel like a lot of people are just, like, saying no to things that are uncomfortable, new, or foreign to them. So really, it's just all about healthy communication. Thank you, Cornell.

That's it for today's episode. See you on Tuesday. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. Be sure to, like, subscribe and give us a review Wherever you listen to the podcast and share this with a friend or partner. You can find me on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter. Exwithemily. Oh, I've been told I give really good, good email. So sign up@sexwithemily.com and while you're there, check out my free guides and articles for more ways to prioritize your pleasure. If you'd like to ask me about your sex life, dating or relationships, call my hotline, 559Talk Sex. That's 559-825-5739 or go to sexwithemily.com askemily Special thanks to Acast for powering the Sex with Emily podcast. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com.

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