Can I Eat My Own Semen? and Other Frequently Asked Questions

With Plan B emergency contraception, we're in control of our future. It's backup birth control you take after unprotected sex that helps prevent pregnancy before it starts. It works by temporarily delaying ovulation, and it won't impact your future fertility. Plan B is available in all 50 US states at all major retailers near you with no ID, prescription, or age requirement needed.

Together, we've got this.

Follow Plan B on Insta @planbonestep to learn more. Use as directed.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily Morse, and on today's show, I'm talking about confidence in and out of the bedroom, how porn is impacting your relationship, and get this, my number one most popular blog post this year: can you eat your own semen? All this and more. Thanks for listening. Hey, Dr. Emily, I've thought about eating my own cum, but I don't have the strength or confidence to do it.

My husband has always eaten his own. He says it's easier cleanup, you know.

After she gave me a blowjob one time, she come up and just kissed me with it still in her mouth, and that's how I was introduced to it.

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex.

Eyes that mock our sacred institutions.

Bedroom eyes, they called them in a bygone day. You're listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily, and I'm here to help you prioritize your pleasure and liberate the conversation around sex. Most of you know I have a blog up on sexwithemily.com. I've had it for 15 years, but we are updating it a lot, and we've got so many great posts every day that, you know, if you want to read sometimes, you're like, oh, after the podcast, I want to hear more about this, you might find that information on our blog. Okay, so here's what happened the last few months. More than any other post, like, you know, you have trends, you might have a website or you know how to read stats, analytics. There's this one post that has been the most popular week after week, month after month. I think it's been for a few months since the beginning of the year. And it was so funny because we have a new marketing director and she, in her first meeting, She was like, "All right, here's the analytics. The number 1 blog post is 'How to Eat Your Own Semen.'" And she just says it straight-faced. And it was amazing. And then I think she kind of got off on it week after week. Anyway, how to eat your own semen is trending. It is popular. I believe that a lot of guys saw it in porn and they want to know, can I eat my own semen? So I thought, hey, if it's trending and it's popular, we gotta cover it. So is this something you've thought about? Have you tried it? I thought, why would we just leave it in the words in the blog? Let's bring it to the podcast. On this episode, I also answer an email from Alice in Australia about insecurities in a relationship. Because here's the deal, relationships are intimate. Relationships can make us insecure. We're gonna all feel vulnerable at some point. In fact, some of our greatest learning happens when we're in a relationship, in relation to somebody else. Because otherwise, we're often not working through stuff. We're not figuring out who we are. We're not figuring out who we are, what we want in a relationship. We learn even when relationships end, right? It can be so hard going through a breakup, but sometimes we just look back, we're like, okay, what did I learn from that relationship? What did I learn about myself? How do I want to be in my next relationship? What don't I want in my next relationship? So we talk a lot about this in this episode because it's like, I do believe this year that shame and vulnerability, you know, thanks to Brené Brown in the last few years, she's sort of made it a buzzword. I think that these words, trauma and insecurities and vulnerabilities and shame, they're in the zeitgeist right now. But that's because our parents, okay, I won't speak for your parents. I'll speak for my parents. Nobody was saying, well, Emily, tell me how you're feeling today. Oh, that looks like you are upset about something. Do you feel shame? That the kids teased you about your shoes at school? Let's talk about that. You know, no, no, our parents didn't know. They didn't learn to unpack things. Or maybe we had a family who, when we cried or we were upset, they acted like nothing was happening, right? They act like it wasn't real, or they discounted your feelings or your thoughts or your emotions and said, oh, just get over it, buck up, don't feel these things. So wouldn't it make sense then we get into a relationship with somebody and we're afraid to be vulnerable. We're afraid to say, sometimes I feel not loved by you, or sometimes I feel like you're gonna cheat on me, or you're gonna leave me because we don't want to be vulnerable. But then the opposite thing happens. We have this big wall of protection up and then nobody really gets to know us. We don't get to have a healthy, deeper connection with somebody. So if you ever been in a relationship with someone like, oh, I date people who are emotionally unavailable, I think I look at it, people who don't really have a lot of self-awareness around their own behaviors. I mean, there's a lot of different ways to slice this, but people who don't ever look at, oh, this was my part in it, or sometimes I feel this thing makes me sad, or I had a rough day at work. I mean, I remember dating someone for a while, and this was a long, you know, probably my 20s, and I couldn't quite put my finger on why I never felt that connected to him. But what I loved was his confidence. He was successful at work. He had a lot of friends. He knew who he was in the world, and I found that so sexy. But what I also realized is there was never a day when he felt things didn't go his way, or he had a bad call with his family who was living out of town, or it was always like other people were doing stuff, or he got really into what his friends' problems were, and he never ever looked at himself. There wasn't self-awareness, self-reflection, depth. Now, maybe you're that person. You're like, "Yeah, I don't want that." Well, then that's fine too. But I believe that in relationships with somebody, whether it's a lover or a friend, When we get comfortable and close with someone, it's when we actually show them who we really are. And that ironically is how we sort of learn to deal with our shame and our vulnerabilities is by shining a light on it. You know, bringing our darkness and the things that we think are our scariest secrets that, oh God, if I show this to anybody, I'm not lovable, which is actually our greatest fear is that we're not gonna be loved. So it's a practice like everything. But once you learn to show these sides of yourself, you can even practice with a friend, you realize that, they're not gonna kill you. They're not as bad as you think, and typically somebody else is having that same experience, and the people you most care about will be able to support you and show you love, and they'll be able to hold space for you and be able to help you move through things that are tough for you and their challenges. I mean, I think that's what relationships are about. So we talk a lot about that in this episode. I also take calls and answer questions from our Instagram, which is @sexwithemily, about porn and dating. So I've talked a lot about porn over the years, and I want to be clear, I I see the benefits to porn. I see the challenges around porn. I think that porn can be a great way to explore our fantasies with our partner, to sometimes use it to turn ourselves on, to show our partner what we like in bed. I mean, everything in moderation, I think, is cool. But lately, I've been getting so many more questions from people whose partners are so into porn that it's having an impact on their performance in the bedroom. It's having an impact on their ability to get aroused or get turned on or have an orgasm. And so these are the downsides of porn. And in fact, there's been a lot more research lately showing that— and this was more done on men than women, but I hear it from all genders— if you are always watching porn and as a result of that, you keep sort of raising the bar of stimulation, you're like, well, that was hot, but I want to watch something even more elevated. And then that becomes a new pattern, it can have an impact on your ability to be aroused and turned on by a partner. I just want you all to have the intimate life and the sex life that you deserve and that you crave. So, we break it all down in this episode. All this and more after the break. Enjoy the show. We're focusing on porn just for right now because I feel that porn is such a fun conversation these days, and a lot of you have been sending in questions questions about it. And they range, the questions range from, is it a problem? Do you think I have a problem with porn? Am I watching too much porn? You know, what's the porn I should watch with my partner? And we also understand the proliferation of porn since smartphones in about 2007, it's just sort of skyrocketed and we all have porn available at all times. And there's always the question like, well, is porn good or bad? Does it have an impact on my sex life or not? So, the thing I want to say about porn is I am in no way anti-porn. I'm not like, "We should ban porn," and, "Why is porn available?" I do believe that porn has some super healthy uses, right? For one, I like that porn can actually help couples figure out what they like. So, for example, you might have this fantasy, you might be into something kinky, something different, and you're like, "Oh, well, here's a great scene in porn." I'm going to watch it with my partner. Or maybe it inspires you in some ways. Can also, you know, discover— we can learn to like discover turn-ons and we can use it to turn ourselves on, turn our partners on. That's what I got the benefits for. But there's also some things with porn that have become problematic. Just like anything. Anything that we tend to really enjoy gives us that dopamine rush and all those feel-good hormones, and we tend to rely on. Just like food, just like drugs. With porn, we tend to increase our use. We tend to watch more explicit content, and sometimes it can have an impact on us. But there's some new data that's come out, a study that talks about— and this is something that's been tossed around for a while, but now there's some conclusive data that shows that consuming porn can cause some erectile dysfunction with penis owners. I mean, this isn't really a surprise to me, but it does— the study does show that the amount of porn a man watches is linked to worse erectile dysfunction. But the other kicker here, watching porn is also associated with greater dissatisfaction with normal sex. And the other thing only 65% of respondents are rating sex with a partner to be more stimulating than porn. Now, I understand these are the people that took a study on porn, right? So I'm going to argue that the porn enthusiasts who are like, yes, I'll take a study on porn. And so maybe that would make sense why a lot of them are saying, well, yeah, what I'm watching, I just, you know, I do find it more interesting than my partner. Okay, well, here's just the study. I'm going to break this down. It says that men who watched quite a lot of porn— there's a big range of responses in this study— that a lot of men averaged 70 minutes a week, normally 5 to 15 minutes per time, with some watching little and some watching much, much more. But here's the interesting thing. They found that 23% of men under 35 who responded to the survey had some levels of erectile function while having sex with a partner. And it's higher than they expected. The other thing is, these guys said, and this is nothing new, that the more they— that the more extreme porn that they watch, they have to keep escalating the level of content that they're watching because they need to— they need to keep, you know, thrilling themselves, right? They need to keep getting more extreme and more intense. Because they're just not aroused anymore, right? They just kind of become— I'm not like, uh, immune to it, but you have to keep raising your level of exposure to it, right? It's like your tolerance, just like with drinking, right? Like, if I haven't had a drink for a few weeks, I have one drink, I'm buzzed, right? You have two drinks, you know, then after a few weeks you're like, oh, two drinks, I'm fine. Same thing with porn. So, the interesting thing here is about erectile dysfunction, because what I used to hear was that erectile dysfunction, meaning inability to stay erect, inability to stay aroused with a partner. You have your erection, then you lose your erection. You have your erection, you lose your erection. I used to only hear about that for men pretty much over the age of 40 because testosterone starts to drop, and men in their 50s and 60s. But then all of a sudden, now I'm hearing from men in their 20s, men in their 30s, And I never want to be like, it's 'cause porn, but that's a big factor. It's also because we don't have great sex education. It's also because if we're on an antidepressant or some other medications, that can also have an impact on your ability to stay aroused. But also if you grew up in a place that was severely repressed, right? Like let's say you grew up in a household that was completely like anti-sex, anti-porn, and then you go out and you try to have sex for the first time, that could also cause erectile dysfunction. So I'm not just saying it's all porn. I believe that the reason why this says that 65% of men say that their porn watching is more exciting than their partner, because they don't listen to Sex with Emily. They don't listen to this show because my thought is that you, you only get to that point. The majority of men are only going to get to the point of having to escalate their porn watching with more intense graphic images are the ones that aren't as comfortable communicating with their partner about their needs. And their need just might be, which by the way, this is what I want every couple, all genders, to have this conversation with their partners. Let's talk about our sex life. We haven't talked about it. I feel like we're doing a lot of the same stuff. And while I love A, B, and C, D about our sex life, these are all the great things. Let's communicate about our sex life more. Communication is lubrication. Let's talk about some things. That could be interesting. You could even say, I saw this really hot scene in this porn. Do you want to watch it together? I mean, just that alone could make a difference. But I think what happens is we're like, well, I'm getting kind of bored. I want something else. I certainly can't talk to my partner about it. So I'm just going to keep turning up the knob and watching more extreme levels of porn. And then we put this on our Instagram just now, which is Sex with Emily Morse. So these are some of your comments just recently. It's good in moderation, especially when it's understood that porn is a fantasy. Depends. I'm a guy that watches it, but I hate the fake moaning. Now listen, a lot of porn is fake. It's like, you know, you hear fake news. It's like fake sex. Like, porn is not an accurate depiction of how you should be having sex. It's like learning to drive by watching Fast and the Furious. You're like, I know how to get behind the wheel. You know, no, you know that that is a movie. The problem is with porn, we don't often tell people what's real and what's not, or we don't want to believe it. But I am telling you that so many porn actors, they're not having orgasms. They're cheating towards camera. They're not hitting all the hotspots at all. Like, it's just, it's fake. It's a story that is created to keep you aroused. And most of it is from the male gaze by men for men. I love this one. This guy said, "Good. Even better when the wife picks the porn. Hotter knowing she likes it too." See? So, I'm all down with you all watching with your partner and even by yourself, but just in moderation. But also saying like, "What are you into?" Someone else said, "Seems fake. Do people really get that crazy?" It is fake. It's just fake. And I think that people are always surprised by that because also, not only is it not an accurate depiction of sex, But it allows us to easily not have expectations of our partner. We're like, oh, well, I'm not going to talk to my partner about what I want. I'm just going to keep watching porn. So we don't express it with our partners. And then it also can teach us habits like performative sex, right? Like we were talking about performative sex, meaning like loud, like our respondent just said, like, what's with all the fake moaning? I believe that porn is directly responsible for a lot of the performative sex that we hear and like the moans. Like, I know that a lot of people who grew up on porn, that if you never saw real sex, because actually, where would you see real sex? You would think, well, cue the fake moaning right now. Cue the deep throating. Last night we talked about deep throating, and to me, that whole like, oh, I gotta take his whole penis in my mouth and like, like choke on it and make these noises, is because we saw that in porn. And I can tell you that I did not hear that years ago, 10 years ago, Nobody was like, "What's with deep throating? How do I deep throat? And what's wrong with my gag reflex?" Because, again, I'm not like canceling your sex life and porn. It's just this is where all this stuff about, you know, porn teaching us behaviors that don't really serve us. Like, it's just this stuff isn't really how we should actually be having sex. Like someone else here said, it can be great as long as it doesn't replace couple fun. When I keep thinking about, well, where do you find real sex? I was talking to a friend's son a few months ago, and he's like 17, and he's super bright kid. And he was like, because a lot of my— I've become the friend that all my friends' kids talk to now about their sex life, which I love. And I told him, and he was, oh, okay. So he was actually having some erectile dysfunction, which again, 18 years old, actually he's 18. And I was explaining to him, like, you know, you— there's more to learn about sex. Like, you just don't know it all. He's like, but I assumed that, like, if there was more for me to know about sex, I would know, like, why didn't we learn in school? Why didn't my parents tell me? And he said, if you're saying this isn't real sex, then where can I go for real sex? And I was like, I didn't have a place to tell him to go for real sex. Like, I wish, and this is like one of my bucket lists, is like creating some kind of educational but still hot platform where you can see like real sex. Real people having sex or like some kind of instructional but not cheesy, like this is the right way and this is like actually like no one cares about your orgasm face and the moaning. And not that moaning isn't important, like I think moaning, you know, I think it's great to make noise during sex, but you want it to be like your authentic moan, your authentic voice. Ovi, you have a question?

Well, I was thinking because last week we were talking a lot about fake orgasming and I don't know, do you think that like people are faking their orgasms more after like an increase in porn use?

Probably. I mean, I don't think that, I think that porn use doesn't help that. I think that goes, that goes under the performative bucket. In porn, this person's coming in 3 minutes. And the other thing in porn we don't see is the warmup. Like the, here's the part where there was warmup or the porn star, she was touching herself or there was lube, like the, oh, talk about, there was no anal prep. This is the other thing about like anal sex. You don't see the lube and the warm-up and the teasing and the playing outside of the anus before you go right in. They just go right in. So, so yeah, I think that faking orgasms has been around for a long time, but with porn, it doesn't help. It doesn't do us any good because you're just like, oh well, everyone's coming, they're coming at the same time, they're coming in all these weird positions that are not actually like accurate of how we're actually going to come. So, those are all the things that impact it. There are some ethical porn, like a lot of you ask, we've got a lot of great information on our website at sexwithemily.com, but there's like Erika Lust, she makes some great ethical porn, and by ethical porn, I mean porn that is made in safe conditions with all different body types, all different genders, all different, you know, all people, all different body, gender, ethnicities, like there's just, you see yourself reflected more than in porn, where porn often also perpetuates this whole, you know, that we're not normal, or we kind of tend to body shame ourselves because we're like, I don't look like the girls in porn. And then so that sets off something. So I don't know, I like, I like some ethical porn. There is a site called Try Quinn, Q-U-I-N-N. And what I love about Try Quinn is that it's essentially audio erotica. And so, for a lot of us, we just, you know, it's not just visual. Sometimes it's just listening, and it's really hot to hear people talk about sex, and there's dirty talk. In fact, I think it's actually a really cool platform for people who want to spice up on their dirty talk or know what to say, but it's just hot to listen to. And you can just listen without having to like, "Oh no, what if someone walks in and I'm watching porn?" But to me, that's even a little bit more like, I don't know, I kind of like the idea of audio erotica. I think, uh, I think it's really cool. I think, I think it's a nice alternative because some people just go to the big tube sites. Yeah, someone said, I like it. Sometimes I'll use porn more for the sounds than the actual audio. Totally agree. And then we have an email. This is from Instagram. Her boyfriend watches porn. It's been 3 years. My boyfriend doesn't really have sex with me but watches porn. Do I break up? I love that. I'm never gonna say just blanket breakup. Yes, I don't have enough information here, but you should definitely talk about your sex life. But how you would have that conversation is you wouldn't say, I've noticed that you watch a lot of porn and we don't have sex. Because to tell someone they have to stop watching porn, just leading with that doesn't work. And in fact, I hear from you guys all the time that you're like, my partner watches too much porn and I need them to stop. And then I also hear from the person who's like, my partner told me to stop watching porn, so I'm hiding in the garage. I think we all know when we're all adults, we know that if someone tells us not to do something, it's just not gonna work, especially when it's porn, especially when it's something that gives us pleasure. It's just like saying, "Don't eat those cookies." If you're trying to watch your sugar intake, all you can think about is sugar. Like, how I would have a conversation if you are concerned about your partner's porn watching is I would just say, you know, again, you guys, this is how I want all the conversations. I love our sex life, babe, but I feel like we haven't been having a lot of sex lately and I miss it. I miss this. Tell them the things you miss about it. Top 3 things you miss. And then you could say, what do you think it's about? Curious, you know? And then you start a conversation rather than you're watching a lot of porn, we never have sex, should we break up? Like, no, that's never how you want to lead a conversation. Stick around and we talk to Alice about insecurities in her relationship. We'll be right back.

This episode is brought to you by Nordstrom. Spring calls for a wardrobe refresh, and Nordstrom has the best styles of the season. From dresses and denim to standout tops and accessories, find the trends and essentials that feel right for you. Discover new arrivals from brands you love like Wayf, Princess Polly, Mango, Adidas, and Free People. Plus, free shipping and returns and free Online styling appointments make everything so easy. Shop in stores at Nordstrom.com or download the Nordstrom app.

I got this email from Alice, 21, in Australia. I've been dating my partner for 6 months. It's my first real relationship. We were best friends for a year and then we started a casual relationship. But we're both anxious people. I haven't been able to finish since earlier this year when I thought I had vaginismus. Which is pain during penetration. I haven't masturbated either since that time. I haven't been able to finish from intercourse. I've gotten close, but I haven't been able to. It started to stress me out, makes me wonder, is there anything wrong with me? But now when I have sex, I'm constantly thinking about finishing and how I'm not able to finish. We love each other. However, I'm not attracted to myself, so I'm not attracted to him either. I've also had other health issues. It just made me feel less attractive and sexual. Please help. I don't know what to do and I feel hopeless. I want to give Alice a hug. But haven't we all sort of felt that way, that there's something about our bodies we don't love, or we're so in our heads thinking about the orgasm that isn't happening, and as a result of that, we don't orgasm? I mean, she told me 4 times in this email that she hasn't been able to. 4 times. Just now, I was like, she hasn't been able to. Alice, tell me, have you been able to orgasm? No, 4 times. No orgasm. And that's because, you guys, it's like, think of it this way. If you're spending— well, first, there's so much to unpack here. First off, if we— I'll say we— if we don't love or even like, or I'm even going to say accept our bodies, accept it, like not hate it, how can we expect anybody else to love our bodies, to love us? I mean, of course they do. I'm not saying your partner doesn't love you, but it's a lot harder for them to to show up and be present if we're walking around hating ourselves. And a result of hating ourselves is self-sabotage, even if it's just negative thoughts. So Alice is walking around all day going, "I'm not happy with myself. I don't like the way I look. I don't like all these things." And then she gets in bed and says, "I'm not going to orgasm. This isn't going to happen." And then she doesn't have an orgasm. So it's like she's constantly setting herself up throughout the week, throughout the day for not being sexually successful. And if you think about it, it's like, think about it like a sport, like you're training for sports. It's like saying, oh, Emily, I went out to run a marathon and I couldn't finish. And the last week, I haven't gone for a run in a month. I hurt my leg. I hate running. You know what I mean? But I couldn't run the marathon. It's like if we don't do all the steps for success, We're not going to succeed at it. So the first thing is what she's saying is it's like this body acceptance, right? I mean, one of the first steps is recognizing it, which I love that you're 21 years old, Alice, and you're like, you know, you nailed it all here. You feel hopeless and you have other health issues and you don't love your— you're not attracted to yourself. I mean, that is a beautiful way of putting it. You know, there's things I've talked about like body exposure exercises when you actually go in front of like a mirror and you start to get used to how you look and actually celebrating it or even just like kind of looking and saying, "Oh, this is pretty amazing the way my body moves." And I would recommend for you, Alice, to take a mirror. You haven't masturbated, right? So I'm gonna give you a project because also you got— it's like not training for the marathon. You gotta masturbate. We gotta get our own pilot, like get the engine running. So like take a mirror and take a look. Maybe you haven't done this at 21. I didn't do it until I was 31, but take a mirror and kind of look and look at your vulva, which is the outside of your vagina. Look at your labia, look at your clitoris, how when you start to touch it, it starts to kind of swell. And you know, when we get aroused, you know, it starts to change. You could just look at it and get curious. Like, okay, I'm just gonna look. And I think what you'll find is that, oh, it's pretty frigging awesome. Like, look at my body. I wanna, you know, I feel like for so many women, like if I had a bunch of vaginas up on the wall, vulvas up on the wall, like, could you pick yours out of a lineup? I mean, I want you to be able to be like, that is mine. That's my vulva. I want that, like that is me, I own it. It's part of us, right? So, it's like this, doing these little exercises, and I do think just saying like, I'm gonna masturbate more, I'm gonna get to know myself again, because just like I told our previous caller, you know, Heather, who wasn't feeling like she wanted to have sex anymore, I think we forget, we have like this amnesia about our sex life, that it feels good and that it's good for us. And so, the first step is making yourself healthy, Alice, and getting, like repairing the relationship with your body, and your orgasm is the first step towards repairing the relationship with your partner. Now, I'm not saying this is exclusive, mutually exclusive. You, of course, could say, like, let's do some mutual masturbation, or you could even share with your partner that— I don't know what kind of partner you have, but you could say, I feel like I've really been in my head. And for many people, like, focusing on connected sex, staring into each other's eyes, doing some, like, dirty talk or tying each other up. You know, when we bring in elements that are like a little kinkier, like bondage or discipline or dirty talk even, those are elements that— think of it this way, like when you use something else to focus on, like, oh, we're doing a role play, oh, we're tying each other up, you, you're not in your head. And, and you can get just turned on by that alone. I think that's why a lot of us really love alternative kinds of sex play, because we're outside of our heads, right? I mean, if you're, if you are in your head during sex. Just think of it this way. The more we're thinking, the blood is leaving your genitals, which is— we need blood flow to be aroused and have orgasms and be sexually aroused. The first part, the orgasm, awesome. But if we're constantly thinking, and believe me, I've been there, I've had the thoughts, I've had the negative thoughts, I've had that I'm not going to orgasm. I was saying like, yeah, I used to just be having sex with a partner and I'd be looking at the clock. Going like, this is certainly taking me too long. I should already have orgasmed by now. What is wrong with me? Could I orgasm? Oh, how did that girl fake it in porn? I'll fake my orgasm. And it's like, I didn't know that it takes a while, that I didn't know anything about communicating to my partner. I didn't, you know, I didn't know what pleased myself. So that's what I want to impart to you. If you could just maybe not beat yourself up and decide that I'm going to make it, you know, I'm going to add to my self-love and self-care routine, like body positive affirmations. Things that you love about yourself. Masturbation is the greatest form of self-love. So, some of those things I think would be a great next step towards your insecurities in the relationship because, you know, the truth is so many of our problems in the relationship come from ourselves, comes from our own like worries in life too. If you think about it, a lot of our suffering comes from repeated negative thoughts. All right, what you've been waiting for. Stick around. We're going to talk about eating your own semen. It's all happening. We'll be right back. I've had tens of thousands of questions in 15 years, but there's one interesting question that in the last 6 to 7 months has been really filling up our inbox all the time. And in fact, my team pulled out like 7 of them in front of me to talk to you about. And then I found out today during one of our meetings that it was the top search term on our website, and it used to be Womanizer, which is one of my— a toy that I love. I was like, really? This replaced it? This topic? This is the one? And I thought it's so interesting because I don't remember being asked this topic in 15 years. I don't think I even— no one asked me it, probably up until the last, like, year or so. So I figured, why not share it with you and see what you think? So the question is whether or not men can eat their own semen. Now, I, I did answer Q&A on our website at sexwithemily.com, answering it. And so now, when I searched it today to see, well, where does it rank on Google? Like, how many people are asking this? And it was like, it was funny because it was like Pornhub, Pornhub, Pornhub, sex with Emily, like, ask Emily, and there was like porn, you know, porn. So I'm thinking that it's because of the rise in porn consumption that people are like, guys are like, oh, huh, maybe I'll try it. This is from Sean at 19 in Ohio. Hey, Dr. Emily, I've been masturbating since I was 15, but for the last 2 years I've thought about eating my own cum, but I don't have the strength or confidence to do it. I've tried all kinds of acts to eating it. The first time I tried was in the middle of the night when I was in my bedroom. I took all my clothes off, including my shirt, shorts, and my underwear. I crawled into my bed naked and was already feeling turned on. I used a little bit of lube, started playing with myself, and I put my legs in the air over my head I closed my eyes but did not have the confidence to open my mouth. And as I came, I had cum on my own face. I tried again the same way, but the second time I was looking at pictures of naked women on my phone for inspiration, but that didn't work either. I don't have the confidence to open my mouth. So please, if you give me some advice on how to get confident with this, I'd be most thankful. Thanks. His was the most descriptive. He's really— you can tell that he's so driven, Sean, and he just can't quite pull the trigger. And this is a common theme from a lot of you. How do I do it? Should I do it? Is it okay? And I'm gonna read you another one. This is from Eddie, 37, in Canada. Love your show, and it's really helped me explore, be comfortable with myself sexually, and really helped me talk things through with my wife. And we're currently having our best sex ever, even after kids. Besides other fantasies, I have a cum-eating kink I don't usually call it cum, but for this sake, I'm gonna redo this verbiage. I say ejaculate so we're all on the same page. Butt semen. I don't talk about it that much. I've shared with my wife. She's a little grossed out as she hates the taste herself. I've eaten my own after masturbating, even straight into my mouth after watching videos. I really want to clean out my wife after sex, but she won't let me as she says once she's gone and done, I can't touch her down there. How can I get her comfortable with me licking it out of her and having multiple Os? Also, I'm starting to have my curious thoughts about taste tasting it from another source, but that can wait till another show. Thanks, Eddie. Then we have Steven 51 on Instagram: Is it unhealthy to eat my semen? Um, Joseph 42 in Colombia: I read a lot about the health benefits, they seem legit, could you verify this? Then we've got Chris 35 in Missouri: I'm 35, I've had a fantasy about going down on my wife and tasting it. It goes on and on and on. So, let's talk about it, right? We've never talked about it on the show. So, the first thing is people want to know, "Is this crazy? Am I normal? What do you think? Is this something that like, oh my, just, am I, is it gonna kill me? What's gonna happen?" So, first off, you have to know that the most normal thing about sex is that you all want to know if you're normal. So, really, like, statistically speaking, we got, I can say like, okay, so, Normal. This is a normal question, statistically speaking, because I get asked it a lot. It's also completely acceptable. And in fact, you know, not every guy wants it, but if you do, nothing wrong with you. Also, people wanna know, is it safe? Absolutely. It is safe to eat it. If it's safe for your partner to eat it, you can eat it too. Now, the other thing is, the only reason why it's not safe is you have to, as always, watch out for STIs. So, if there's an STI, if you just had sex with your partner and she, you know, maybe you're with whoever you're with, then it could transfer to you. So, that's when we have to be careful because if you ingest it, if you ingest the semen, then you could become infected. But let's say you're not infected. Like, let's say you're not. So, to answer it, I can go by this. What are the other questions people ask me? Can you change the taste of it? I mean, here's the thing about this. You are what you eat. And so, I know this, if you are smoking cigarettes and you are eating a really unhealthy diet, a lot of greasy fatty foods and, you know, all the things that, you know, you're taking a lot of medication, it is going to have an impact on your semen. Just like if you eat asparagus and you can smell that, right, in your urine, it's the same kind of thing. Now, it's not that if you just eat a pineapple tonight, tomorrow it's going to be better. This is an ongoing, you know, you want to, you know, just change to a healthier diet, include like vegetables and lots of greens and fruits and stuff. So, that's also important, what you eat. And a lot of you call in, like, okay, I have a list here. Celery, parsley, wheatgrass, cinnamon, pineapple, papaya, oranges. But that's not just, again, it's not like a one-time fix or one-time thing, but I think overall having a healthy diet is super important, especially for our sexual functioning. And so, we can just answer Sean's question about, like, how do I do it? I mean, I'm not a guy, but I can tell you this, that you could just ejaculate in your hand. You could put it in something and then lick it from there. I'm just thinking, like, just taste it. I mean, just— it's there. It comes out in your hand. Lick it off your hand. See where it goes. See how it tastes. I think it's very sweet that he's trying to get his positioning right where his legs are tossed over his head and he's trying to taste it. Yes, Maritza.

I mean, I'm just curious too. I wonder what the mental block is or what the hangup is that men have because women are doing it for them, or I—

not to be— their partners are doing it.

So even if it is a male partner, if it is, you know, someone else, ever, you know, if it's another person, no one has a problem with swallowing it. But what's wrong with yourself, right?

I think Like, why? I think it's like shame, taboo, you know, and I think also all of our jacklets. Sex gets such a bad rap. It's like everything is gross or messy. If a woman, you know, squirts or a guy comes and all they're told about their semen probably is like, oh, it tastes bad, or I have to do, you know, it's, there's a lot of shame around it. And I think that if they've never tasted it, they assume that it's like this terrible tasting thing, or maybe they have a partner that told them that. I think it's part of it, and also clearly we don't hear about it that much because I'm telling you, I didn't get this question. We searched all of our email, like, I did not get this question. So I wanna know, is this important? You can even just tell me, I'm curious, 'cause I haven't, that's not the porn that I'm watching, but I have to think that so many things, like even the rise in anal sex, which was not a question 12 years ago, is because of porn. So I'm thinking that this is the new porn darling, is men wanting to taste themselves. And the truth is, you guys, it's not bad. I don't know, I've just been someone who's— if you're with a— like, sex is messy. It doesn't maybe always— it doesn't go the way you want it, or maybe it's not everything that you, you know, that you want to taste or you want to. But that's just part of sex. And I don't think it's— I've never had a problem with semen, to be honest. It was never my enemy. This was actually when one of my first shows, I remember, maybe it was like show 4 or 5, my friend came on and he was, my friend Ed, I'll never forget this. This was early on and he was like, do you spit or swallow? And I said, swallow. I was like, I didn't even know there was an option. Like, I think I just thought if you're giving a blowjob, like good girl, like that's, to give a good blowjob, you will swallow. And he's like, that's so you, like, you know, A student, whatever. And he's like, but he's like, I feel that it's, it's so intimate that if someone did that and it was just like the first time I was with them or something, that it feels very personal, and I, I don't know if I would want that with every blowjob. I thought that was interesting. So I did it, and that's why I just like, you know, you just swallow. I mean, I, I don't— I never was— what, were you gonna go spit, get up to the bathroom? It just seemed like the right thing to do, and it never bothered me. I never got sick from it. I mean, you can be allergic to it, but it's very rare. You know, that's what you do. Amber, thank you, Amber. I need tier 44 in Ohio. Tell me about common men eating their own ejaculate. Tell me everything you know.

Hey, Dr. Emily. So my husband has always eaten his own when he's masturbating, and he told me very early on, I have no problem with it. He says it's easier cleanup, you know.

That is true. That is one of the benefits. You don't have to— you just kind of lick it up, fall asleep. You don't have to get up and walk, right? Yeah. Did you ever see him do it? Has he ever— have you ever been there when he does it, or he just gives you the silence.

We've done mutual masturbation, um, and he's done it then. I have no issue with it. I think a lot of men feel ashamed of it, that they think that maybe people will think they're gay because they want to taste cum or something like that. But to me, it's no problem, and I think a lot of other women may feel the same.

I agree with you, Amber. I think that we do, and I think that— I think, yeah, I think you're right. Why, why would we be upset? Although, although we said that here, that this, you know, his wife didn't want him to.

Eddie, right? Right.

She's not comfortable. And sometimes I think it's because we— maybe women think that we don't taste good after that. Like, if they go down on us and they come inside of us, then if he goes down on me afterwards, or, you know, her, his wife, that she's like, no. Or maybe she's got shame in him, like, oh, that makes you gay. We have all these things, you guys. A sex act does not make you gay. It's about who you're having sex with. But anyway, thank you, Amber.

Yeah, but I wanted to thank you because you've opened up a lot of conversations.

I'm so glad, Amber. That makes me happy. Thank you.

We've started using a lot more toys. Um, we got some, uh, prostate, uh, like plugs, and we've started using those and a cock ring because we were having some trouble with premature ejaculation. Oh, okay. We're working on that, and the cock ring's helping, and just different toys to take mind also is coming too quickly.

That's great.

And that's great for you.

Of course, it makes me so happy. It's so good to talk to you. Keep trying new things, right? We get so stuck in our ways sexually, but like, spice it up, right? I mean, how long have you guys been together?

Um, 17 years.

Okay, right. Good, Amber. That's awesome. Congratulations. I love hearing about couples who've been together and they're like, I'm going to step it up, we're going to try something different, keep it interesting. Exactly.

And your outcome could be something totally different, right?

Hey, why not, right? Why not? What do you got? What else are you gonna do this weekend? We're home quarantined. Try it out. Ah, thank you, Amber. So awesome to hear from you.

No problem.

I need to let you go. I'm driving a truck and I'm almost to where I need to go.

Okay, be safe, Amber. We'll talk to you soon.

Thank you.

Of course. Thank you, Vic. Uh, hi, Vic. He's in his 50s. Vic.

Hello.

Hello, Vic. Tell me everything.

Well, hey, you know, I was just— I just came across your show and I was listening to it. I thought, well, what the heck, I'll chime in. But like years ago when I was in my 20s, I was curious about this, and early 30s, so I did it. And I was like the same with the other guy where I just kind of closed my eyes and then I'd end up just coming on my face, you know. And then eventually I just said, well, I'm just gonna go for it. Not really much happened. I mean, it doesn't taste like much, and it really wasn't that big of a deal. But, but what I always found is that right when, right when I come, I don't— I'm not horny anymore. So then I try to like— then I like— I was like, I'm like, okay, I don't want it on my face, you know what I mean? So I, that's— I kind of just quit doing it because that's the way it happened.

You're like, I'm done, I'm going to sleep, this is over. So, so it's more like the idea—

even right when it's coming out, you're like, okay, That's enough. I don't want it all over me.

Right, right.

But as far as like going on down on your girl or your wife or whatever, that is— that's a good way to do it. Like, instead of just trying to go be gay like that one guy said, just—

he said it's not gay—

your wife and then wait 10 minutes and then, uh, you know, go down there.

You don't have to wait, and it doesn't make you gay. We were saying it doesn't make you gay. It's not a gay thing, but people think everything's a gay thing if it has to do with the penis beyond like penetration. They're like, oh, it makes me gay if I want something in my prostate. Like, no, it just makes you smart, makes you educated, and realizing that you can have pleasure.

Yeah, well, that one guy said, uh, that he was thinking about going to a man, you know.

Oh yeah, he might be bisexual, right? Oh, we gotta, we gotta address his question too. Thank you for bringing me back, Vic. I appreciate it, and thanks for your call.

Yeah, you appreciate that.

All right, Vic, have a great night. Thanks for calling. I think we got to get back to Eddie because he's right, he's going to talk about being bisexual in the next show. "But," he said in his next email, "How do you get comfortable?" He wants to know how he gets his wife comfortable with me licking it out of her after having multiple orgasms. And again, I think it's just like all the things I tell you about. How do you get your partner comfortable with anything is actually having a neutral conversation outside the bedroom, not saying like, "Why won't you let me do that? I just, you know, I want to taste it." But just saying, "What is it about that? I'm curious. I know that we've talked about it and I've been wanting to do that." "Is it about it that makes you not comfortable?" And then you start to get your answers. If she's like, "Oh, well, I feel like it's bad for you or it's not sanitary," you know, then you could say, "Well, I heard Dr. Emily Morse say it's actually not if we don't have STDs." Or maybe she feels like she doesn't feel sanitary down there and tell her you're fine and she's fine. Remember that the vagina is a self-cleaning oven. That's what it cleans itself. So there's all these, you know, we have natural acidic levels we keep we're good. So, we don't have to worry about that. Oh, the other thing is the health benefits. So, here's the thing. There are some health benefits. Studies have shown that there are like mood-enhancing qualities to it. It can help with your skin. It can help with depression. It can help with— but let me tell you this. You're gonna have to ingest a lot of semen. You're gonna have to be like collecting it for it actually to have that kind of impact. I don't know how you'd collect that much. But you could. But this is all inconclusive studies. But however, what if it does? What if you try it and that's a benefit? Great. But I don't think that's why we're doing it. I think it's more of a something that we just thought, why not? I'm having my partner taste it, why don't I taste it? Maybe turn yourself on. It's all fine here at Sex with Emily. Let's talk to Mike 63 in Wyoming. Hi, Mike. Thanks for calling. What's going on?

Uh, you're welcome. Uh, I was, uh, trying to interfere. My introduction to it was, uh, with my wife of 42 years. Uh, after she gave me a blowjob one time, that she come up and just kissed me with it still in her mouth. And, uh, that's how I was introduced to it. And, and up until that time, I just thought it was taboo too for a man, you know. Right. I come to find out this shit doesn't taste bad at all. It's usually a little bit salty Exactly, gets a bad rap.

It really does get a bad rap, Mike.

Yeah, I know, I, I, I would want giving it one, but up until that time— and this happened about, uh, about 25 years ago, so, uh, it— and it's happened several times since then.

Okay, and you were fine with it? Yeah, a little bit, a little bit hot, right? Something a little different.

Yes. Yeah, it was, you know, I guess you call it a pleasant surprise.

Exactly. You don't know what's gonna happen next. 42 years, you know, who knows? I know, I love it, Mike.

You're right.

Which is a good thing, keeps you on your toes. Thank you, Mike. Thanks for your call. Appreciate you. You can find me online at sexwithemily.com and on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook @sexwithemily. Find me Monday through Friday, 5 to 7 PM Pacific on SiriusXM Stars for even more sex talk, calls, and interviews. Was it good for you? Email me feedback@sexwithemily.com. And don't forget, share the love, like, subscribe, and share. Because if you enjoyed the show, your partner or lover or best friend will too. How many discounts does USAA Auto Insurance offer? Too many to say here. Multi-vehicle discount, safe driver discount, new vehicle discount, storage discount, legacy vehicle discount.

How many discounts will you stack up? Tap the banner or visit usaa.com/autodiscounts Restrictions apply.