How to Master the Bedroom Basics

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Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. Tonight we're going back to the bedroom basics. I mean, if you really want to have the best sex of your life, it can't hurt to fine-tune your skills, right? I mean, maybe you've learned to twist yourself into a pretzel during doggy style, but if you can't give a good handjob, what the hell's the point? This show is taking you back to the basics, the things you think you learned in middle school but forgot along the way. But first, thanks for supporting my sponsors that help keep this show free. You have got to check out all the amazing toys at goodvibes.com. Because there's really nowhere else to buy toys because they pick the very, very best toys. They don't sell any of that schlocky stuff that's gonna, like, burn you and blow up your vagina because that happens. They carry all the best sex toy brands. You can get the Magic Wand, of course, which is everyone's favorite. And you can also get the Dahlia. It's my favorite from Vibratex. Like a rabbit but has like all these twists to it and you will love it. This has this little butterfly thing and your clitters. You're gonna love it all. Go to my site sexwithemily.com, click on the Good Vibes banner to see my favorite toys because you know I have tried them all. Use coupon code GVEMILY20 at goodvibes.com.

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they called them in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend?

'Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. A girl's gotta have her standards.

Oh my.

Do women know about shrinkage?

Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks? Can we not talk about sex so much?

Are you kidding me?

Oh my God, it feels so good.

Being bad feels pretty good.

But you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex and the City. Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com because you're gonna love it there, because you're gonna have so much more information to improve your sex life and have better relationships. We've got blogs, videos, we've got a mailing list that you have to sign up for if you haven't already, because I'll send you really interesting emails that you actually will learn things from. That's what I'm all about. I'm all about having— helping you have the best sex and relationships and life that you want. That's why I'm on the planet, right, Anderson?

Just, uh, making people have better sex.

I just need to start having sex again. I've decided that's on my bucket list now. It's been a while for me, and from that—

how long, honestly?

Like a month. But for me, that's a long time.

Wait a minute, what? What, a month?

I know.

No, practice what you preach, dude.

I'm— dude, I'm just kidding with everyone.

No, you're banging yourself though.

Oh yeah, dude, I've had like a million sex Be, is you're gonna hear sex. I actually thought I had more sex toys than anyone on the planet except for some, a couple that I'm gonna tell you about next.

No.

Yeah, totally. It's not that I'm not, you know, having fun alone, but, um, yeah. And I'm having amazing sex when I'm having it. I'm just kidding around. I was joking with my friends cuz they're like, a month isn't a long time. Like, what's the longest you've ever gone without sex?

12 years.

Shut up. Yeah. You're such a liar.

0 to 12.

And then after 12, how long?

Uh, I don't know. It's a good question.

You lost your virginity?

6 months.

Really? Yeah. Were you sick or something?

Or— yeah, just in between.

Yeah. No, I never had a big huge— I mean, I really— I've always sort of, you know, had— but not like I was— I had— I was a serial monogamous for a long time.

Love addict.

Going from one— maybe, maybe I tried to be a love addict. It didn't work. I'm actually not a love addict. I really wanted to be part of like a 12-step program, but I'm not addicted to anything, so Addictions are tough.

I mean, no, I mean, they're hard to actually, if you're not an addict, like I remember trying to be an alcoholic when I was a kid. Like I seriously put like vodka in my Snapple, took it to school, and then I was like tired and sick in the middle of the day. I'm like, this is hard work.

Right, exactly. No, but I'm serious. I have so many friends who have benefited from different programs, like 12-step programs, and I went through this phase where I was like, 'cause I've seen people change so much from it who've gotten sober, and then my therapist once, it was years ago, I was like, well, I just love the steps. It's just so amazing what you go through and how you change. And she's like, well, maybe you're a sex and love addict. So I went, but I'm not, turns out. But, um, I do have sex and I want— I have some experience that I'm going to share with some people tonight.

I would think so.

The show is about, like I said, going back to the basics. There's certain things, you know, I talk about sometimes some more advanced moves or things and you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. But there's some basic things you got to know about sex to have great sex. It's the foundation of sex. And we're going to get into that. We're also going to be reading the emails that you sent to feedback@sexwithemily.com. I do read all your emails and I love hearing from you and answering them. And also we're looking for interns. We're always looking for interns at Sex with Emily. So same thing, emails, feedback@sexwithemily.com. It's super fun. In fact, I have one of my interns sitting here. She's now my assistant. Yeah. Working with me in a larger capacity.

Yes, I am.

I wouldn't even say assistant. I say you're like, you're doing lots of different things for me.

Yes, I may have—

Writing, helping production. Jack of all trades. She is a jack of all trades. She's amazing. And it's fun, right, Madison? You've learned a thing or two.

I've had so much fun. I can't even tell you. All of my friends are jealous of my internship. It's got, it's got benefits, let's just say.

Right, right. You get some toys, you get some knowledge, you get some, you know, we have good times. So anyway, email me and yeah, I'd love that. Also, okay, speaking of learning things, back to school, all that stuff. Hustler workshop. I taught one here in Los Angeles at the Hustler Hollywood store in Los Angeles, which I never taught a live workshop, and there was over 250 people and it was a great night. And now I'm doing it again in San Diego. So come, it's October 25th. You can RSVP again, feedback@sexwithemily.com, or join the invite on my Facebook page, which is also facebook.com/sexwithemily. And it's gonna be fun. It's called How to Blow His Mind in Bed, but it's for men, women, couples. and people learned a lot and we had a good time and I think you will love it and I'd love to meet you. Also, Sexual Health Expo. Okay, you guys, this will be done soon. I promise. I hate like even hearing myself say all this, but I'll be doing another live event, which is the first of its kind ever. And it's in Los Angeles, January 17th and 18th. I'm the host of it and giving the keynote and it's, it's for any, like I go to all these sex toy shows and stuff, but this is for people like you who want to have better sex and relationships. And there are going to be workshops taught by the most, like the leading experts that like, if I want to take classes, more classes, I would go to them. And there's going to be all the toys and the latest and greatest products. And for 2 days in Hollywood, there's like fancy fun parties, not super fancy, but it's just super fun, cool parties and great people and interesting conversations. You're going to love it. It's called the Sexual Health Expo. Go to sexualhealthexpo.com, buy your tickets today. That's what I got to say. That's a lot. Damn. Um, anything else? Twitter chats. I'm just reading all these notes here. 12:30 to 1:00 PM @sexwithemily. I answer all your questions. And, uh, yeah, anything else, Madison? No? Anderson, you got anything to say? Anything that I forgot?

No, I'm excited for some emails and some of your advice.

Oh, you just want me to keep talking? Okay, first, sex in the news. I just, I gotta share it with you because there's some crazy stuff going on. Speaking of sex toys, somebody has more sex toys than I do. There's a UK couple, they saved their marriage with $32,000 worth of sex toys. Dolls. So they're not really toys.

These people are a little out there, but they're the Lars and the Real Girl dolls.

Like the— no, like the big blow-up dolls and stuff.

No, like the Lars and the Real Girl.

Oh yeah, yeah, totally. Exactly. Oh yeah, exactly. Oh, sorry, the movie.

Like the really expensive dolls that look— they look like real dead people.

I missed the reference. Exactly. So it says here, ever fantasized about having a threesome but thought it might be, you know, awkward? Because every number one fantasy for men is to have a threesome, if you didn't know. A couple has found a way to have that by having the third or even fourth person as a life-size silicone doll. So Dave Hockey and his partner Shawna openly admit to having spent $32,000 on their plastic friends. They have 5, including Bianca and Terry. They name them, which is nice because it makes it more personal. You're like, I'm gonna fuck Bianca tonight, you know what I mean? Um, it's not just about sex. So the couple claims that the dolls have enhanced the relationship and even making them part of their wedding. Or do you think these people met— are they healthy people? You think there's something wrong?

If they need sex dolls to get to marriage, I think there's something off.

This is a little off. Okay, they described that they're always in a constant state of arousal and they, um, shot the dolls or them. No, they are this couple, these dolls of safety.

We need to go back for one second because I had to get up and close the door because when you talk about this kind of thing, I need the door closed.

Why? Story of my life.

We share the building with, uh, you know, NBC Sports.

Oh, you're right.

When you're talking about fucking Bianca, I feel like that the door should be closed.

Right, dude. Story of my life. You should spend my door.

I know, at your office.

No, but today, what was I saying when he walked by? I'm like, so the hand job— I was talking to you about a hand job.

Yeah.

I'm like, when you're giving a hand job— this guy just looks me in the eye. I'm like, who's the—

who's the child celebrity that, uh, or old child celebrity that, that has an office by you?

He's not there, he's just left, but he was the, um, from, uh, the, the baseball kid from— oh yeah, Lucas.

Yeah, the kid that ate his own picture on his wall.

Yeah, and he's got all these celebs and he's, he's I always pick—

I like to picture somebody like reacting to you. So anyways, you, you said that they made these sex dolls part of their wedding?

They played part of their wedding.

Were they like the ring bearer, like in a remote control?

Well, it looks like one of them is in a wheelchair here and they're pushing them along.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Exactly. So they're, um, so it's kind of like a threesome but nobody gets hurt, which is actually— oh, that's a good point. There's no emotions involved really. I mean, unless one of them deflates or something and they get really sad. But the sex being introduced Why? Because it's silicone. I keep thinking they're blow-up dolls, you know what I'm saying?

All I know about them is from Lars and the Real Girl. I don't know anything beyond that.

I remember that, exactly. So despite being introduced to the world of eye-dollators by Dave, Shawna is adamant that it isn't just trying to please him. I'm doing it for myself. I picked the eye color and made Terry the way I wanted to. So there's photos on my blog at sexwithemily.com because you just got to see it to believe it. They're hugging them, they're caressing them, and they're even on a talk show here.

Yeah, my personal favorite is that Terry, who is the male sex doll— what kind of a name is Terry for a sex doll, first and foremost? Right, I need to think about that. He has 3 different parts down there, but it doesn't tell us what they are.

Well, I would think that it's vagina.

No, he. Terry's a he.

He has 3 different parts, though.

You think he's a vagina and a penis?

Yeah, if you're gonna call him Terry, it's like, it can go either way, right?

Okay, I don't know.

I don't know what that third mysterious—

But!

Like a tentacle?

I have no idea. And then also there's jealousy. There's jealousy between the couple and the dolls, but they've got to realize that Bianca is just a doll.

Where's the jealousy part?

It just says that they're sometimes—

they get jealous, right? But they realize it's only a doll. If you— honey, Terry's only a doll, you know what I mean?

She's called a real doll.

$32,000. Talk about having like extra cash line.

So they cost 6 grand apiece, uh, thereabouts, if I recall, from Lars and the Real Girl. Plus tax, that puts you around $32,000 for 5 of them.

Hey, you know what? I'm not knocking anything. Whatever helps you guys have a stronger marriage, whatevs. Hopefully they have friends too, and they go out.

Now how does the story begin? Like they save themselves financially?

They made an investment.

Did they sell them?

No, they bought them.

Can they sell them? Did they lose their money?

They didn't save themselves, they saved their relationship.

They saved their relationship by buying silicone dolls and named them that have multiple parts that are organs.

I got all that, yes.

And they live with them and they participate in their wedding and they brought them closer and it's like having a threesome but there's no emotion.

You know how they—

Although sometimes they get jealous because Terry has 3 parts that are unnamed. And Shawna the wife does not have 3 parts.

What's the husband's name?

Hockey? Yeah, Dave or something.

Dave?

Of course.

You think Dave takes it? From Terry?

You know—

You think he's pegging himself over there?

Yeah, for sure he pegs.

Okay.

Yeah.

Now you know how like when you buy a brand new car, they say as soon as you drive it off the lot, like it depreciates by 15%?

Yes.

What do you think the deal is with the RealDolls?

Oh my God, you can't sell them back, what do you mean?

I'm sure that there's somebody who's hard up and would really like one and they buy a used one. Used, uh, dude, go on eBay.

I wish there's some used dolls. You guys, don't buy used toys. Seriously, really?

Okay, they're not toys, they're dolls. They're real dolls.

Although sometimes I wish I could sell my used toys because like I've used them once. I know this is so gross, I never would, don't worry. But like once, and sometimes I never even used them, I just opened them and then I like— but I can't like give them to anyone because people would— you can't just do that.

No, of course you cannot do that. No, I know, but I have so many that I picture the hockey couple just now getting really mad at you going, don't call Terry a toy, Terry's much more than a toy.

But sometimes I'll use a toy because I can't find it, I'm like, I know I had this, and I'll open it I'm like, oh, there it is. I'm like, oh, I could have given this to Madison, for example, or to your wife. But don't worry, I do have toys. I have—

here, honey, this is a used sex toy.

No, no, I'm gonna give you— I'm not gonna give you a used one. Okay, so another sex in the news story: a crazy bra camera tells women just how often people check out their rack, which is so awesome. Have you ever thought someone was staring at your chest but wondered if you only imagined it? Well, thanks to Nestlé Fitness Bra Cam, one woman has a chance to see just who was ogling her, and it turns out it's a pretty big group. In honor of October serving as Breast Cancer Awareness Month, which it is, uh, it's happy October, uh, Nestlé, like Nestlé chocolate.

That's what I was wondering too.

That's the most disturbing part.

They've expanded their scope a lot.

If they're hitting you on both ends, is this like some kind of— did you say, uh, training or fitness thing related thing as well?

It's a camera in the bra. So Nestlé is reminding women to check themselves by outfitting a hot pink bra with a camera and sending a volunteer out to put it into the chest or test. Now, some detractors have pointed out that, of course, men, infants, dogs, and even other women are going to stare at a pair when they're wrapped in a cotton candy pink brassiere. But still, if the concept behind the project raises awareness and encourages women to examine their breasts, why not? Women of all ages should perform a self-breast exam at least once a month. So they have a positive message. It's not— see, it's not just to see like, oh my God, 62 guys checking out my boobs. It's just to remind women that your breasts are important and that you should always get them checked.

What's the message though? Like, all these other strangers are examining my breasts every day. I I should examine them once myself.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Nestlé has launched this quirky campaign before. In 2013, the company debuted its tweeting bra, which allowed it to chirp each time it unclasped. What? I didn't want to read the rest. While these videos don't necessarily give any breast cancer information, people certainly are taking them, and that's a great start. So people, get your boobs checked.

If I was you guys, I would have a whore-off and see who can get the most stares.

Honestly, I would have won this morning. I was walking into the office, and people were smiling and waving at me on my way up to the office. The coffee guys were kind of staring at me this morning. I get to the office and I walk in, I look down, it's 'cause my boobs are out. And that's why people are like, "Oh." Like, my boobs are— like, my shirt has fallen so far down that it's like, it's just all cleavage and like—

Would a hungry child like approach you and be fed if— was it like all out?

No, no, no, I mean like, no nipples, but it's like, they were like hanging out.

Come on, I don't believe you.

Honestly, honestly, it was so funny. It's 'cause my bag like moves my shirt when I get it, so they're like hanging low. And so this guy in the office was like, kinda like looking at me as I was walking down the hall, and I felt like he was leering, and I was like, "What's that about?" And then I looked down and was like, "Oh no." Honey, we gotta be careful because we already have a reputation at Seth's family.

I don't appreciate that. But you know what, Madison, let's just be honest, you didn't tell me that my, on my blue underwear was wrapped around my tank top all day out of my jeans.

So it was a new belt.

She thought it was a belt and it was my underwear was hanging out of my jeans probably the entire day. No, no, it was not hot. My jeans are super baggy because I need to wash them, you know, they get stretched. And I was in a rush and I, and my blue underwear, it was, it was, could not have been a belt.

She had like a loose flowy shirt that was like kind of tucked into it and it looked like it was a belt to give like a shirt some type of— you guys think you have a bad reputation now, wait till I Used real doll delivered to your office.

We have a huge penis. You want, like, the first thing you see, you saw this when you look in the office. I mean, it's all like the Emily and Tony products and sex toys, and yes, there's some phallic objects, but then there's a, our mascot Maurice, which is just a flaccid silicone penis that just sort of folds over the shelf. It's probably about 10 inches maybe.

Yeah, it can't support itself, so it can't support itself.

So it's, it's, it's not, it's a non-erect penis.

Flaccid. Yeah, you guys should just go with it. Like, just everything, like door stoppers should just be like dildos. Yeah, you should have like little dicks on the wall where you hang your keys.

Oh, that's a good idea. Do you know that I have a whole series of dick objects? I have like a dick lighter, I have a dick cigarette smoking thing. They got like, oh, a vaporizer cigarette. I don't know why they gave it to me at the sex toy show, but it's a penis. And I have penis—

who was that marketed to? Like, who? What kind of woman or dude?

Bachelorette parties. Bachelorette parties.

I want to vape out of a dick.

I got a penis necklace. I have a penis cookie. Um, I can make a cake The shape of a penis.

You get the penis pasta.

I do have the— I own the penis pasta.

I ate it. It made me feel gay.

Oh, penises. Who doesn't love penises, right? Okay, so, um, yeah, so those are crazy sex in the news. Let's get into our show topic here because this is very important. Okay, I actually— this is— this inspired us today because I wrote a blog. So I have a blog that I write every Sunday night for Glamour. Glamour.com, the magazine, and they hadn't really had a sex columnist before, so I do one every Sunday night, which is awesome, so you gotta check that out. But also, and I always tweet it out and put it on my site, but I also sometimes help them with articles and other things, and this was their back-to-school blog, and this is actually an expansion of that, but this is what inspired us to do this, is it was back-to-school sex, kissing, and hooking up basics every woman and man should know. So I thought to myself, You know, we always talk about communicating, talk to your partner, and kink, and a lot of things, but there's just some basic things that if people just nail it, they will have the best sex. And I thought, I'm gonna break it down for them again.

The nuts and bolts.

We need a refresher course.

Meat and potatoes.

We are gonna talk about nuts, thanks for asking.

Meat and potatoes. I didn't try and do the nuts part.

Me too.

I wasn't trying to do the pun.

Did I tell you that you had to talk about your nuts tonight?

No, no, I was just—

I get it.

It was an unintentional pun.

The problem is, working in sex, everything's a pun. All the time, and it's not even funny anymore because you're like, I know, it's not even funny. The first one is masturbation, because everything in life for men and women starts with knowing your own body, because you will never ever have the sex that you want. And I'm going to start with women because guys are simpler in this category, but I do have tips for women. But women— and I'd say one of the top questions I get asked from women is, you know, why can't I orgasm? And why isn't make sex more pleasurable, and my boyfriend won't do this, or my partner won't do this. And, or guys call in all the time, or, you know, to love life. My girlfriend can't orgasm. Has she ever had one? I don't know. Because women, we were all brought up to believe that men were— socialized to believe that dudes are going to come into our life and then we're going to have mind-blowing orgasms. I always say, someday my prince will come and so will I. That's what women believe. And some women are lucky. There are a lot of women who, like, the first time they have sex, they're like, I, you know, like, I had mind-blowing orgasms. Or they were like riding a bike when they were in 5th grade and they had an orgasm. You know, they do very easily knew their bodies and they masturbated, but a lot of women don't. And even if they do, there's always ways you could be learning more about your body, and there's other ways you can orgasm. There's nipple orgasms and G-spot orgasms. So the key to an amazing sex life is knowing your body, right, Madison? Don't you think?

Yes, absolutely. How can you tell someone else how to please you if you don't even know yourself?

Exactly. And guys are not mind readers, and this is one of the things that I think that women and men. But again, I think it's— I hear it more from women that we just want guys to know. We're like, I don't want to have to tell him to tell me I look beautiful tonight. I just want him to know to do it. Or I don't want to tell him to go down on me. I just— why doesn't he know? Because guys are not mind readers.

We're not intuitive like you guys are either.

No. And you just— you don't know. And maybe your last girlfriend hated when you told her she was beautiful. She was like, I got her embarrassed. So you never told— you know what I mean? And you're not mind readers. How the hell are you supposed to know?

I think you ladies are much more intuitive than most guys.

We are. No, women are way more intuitive. Because we're like, we're more inherently nurturing and caretakers, and we want to please. Like, we really want to please you so badly. We want to look good for you. Who doesn't?

I mean, I've dated some girls who don't really care.

They don't care.

They're all into being pleased by me.

But yeah, selfish lovers. Yeah, you know what, you're right. I'm not going to discriminate. Men and women can both sometimes not be the most—

but I can tell you this, as a guy, women not knowing their own bodies or like how they work or, you know, fiddling around with themselves. That doesn't even occur to a guy. Like, that just doesn't— a guy would never go through life, never get past age 15, right, without figuring it all out, right?

And you almost like give your wet dream, whatever it is, it just gets hard one day, you touch it, right? Like, do you remember the first time you like touched your penis and thought, oh, you're just staring at me, you're not gonna answer that? Anyway, I know that I have a male friend who was telling me the other day that he said one day he was like 5 years old When he was like 5 or 6 years old, he said his penis was hard and it got erect and he went into the kitchen and he was like, Mommy, he's like, what's happened? Like, what's going on? And she's like, honey, just ignore it, it'll go away. That's what he told her. But you know what I'm saying?

There's like a time in life— that's how men deal with almost everything. Yeah, we just ignore it.

You repress it, it's gonna go away. But for me, for example, and if you've been listening to the show, I've said this, it didn't even occur to me to masturbate until I started having sex and wasn't having orgasms because I heard, I heard about them.

How old? Like 21?

19.

19. Before you're like, hey, I could touch myself.

I'm so busy, I never thought about it.

Us guys, we're like, when we're like 12, 13 years old, we're like, I wish I was a girl, right? I would just stare at myself in the mirror all day, be naked all day, touch myself all day.

It'd be great, right? And a lot of women— so some— Madison, was your— were you— did you masturbate when you were younger?

No, I didn't actually. Um, the most like erotic thing that ever happened to me was I passed in front of a pool jet when I was in the pool and I was like 9 years old and I was like, what in God's name is that? I'm just like, I could hang out here for a while. And then they're like, move along.

And I was like It's like, oh, right. But did you— public pool? Yeah, so many women learn through that. Oh, there's that cool sex toy, the sex toy show, the Bubba Love. This woman made this new sex toy that simulates that, like whatever bath you're in, it like— you put it in the water, it's a sex toy for the water, and it creates those jets. Because a lot of women have their first orgasms like in the shower or in the tub, like they discover it. So anyway, women, the point is, is that you need to spend that alone time. And if you're not— because your guy's not gonna figure it out, so you figure out what you like, and then You move that way with him. You tell him, you show him, you take his hand, whatever you have to do. And there's nothing to be embarrassed about because I think that women again think that like, he's going to think that I'm— I don't know if women still think this, he's going to think I'm a slut or I'm easier. I know myself.

I don't think so. Nowadays I feel like so many girls are opting for the other end. They like feel like they have to be hypersexual in order to make guys like them, to get their attention and everything like that.

But they're being hypersexual. But are they, are they Do they know how to please themselves?

No, no, no.

Between sleeping with someone a lot and not getting your own, not taking, not taking responsibility for your own orgasm.

Yeah, I don't know a lot of friends who orgasm or who like masturbate openly and like talk about it. It's kind of like, even in college, it was kind of like very taboo. Like, right, I talked about it.

I know, I swear to God. Like, I, it was like my best friends, they used to like, then they would start like sending me articles all the time and like, like, like in the mail or emailing me stuff. They're like, read this, read this. My mom was sending me books because my mom got in the comments.

What?

I never asked her. She like bought me a book, which is still a great book called— Lonnie Barbak wrote it. It's called For Yourself. Yeah, my mom was like, she's like, Emily, do you ever get high or something? She thought I was like too stressed out.

Is she Jewish?

Yeah.

Can you do it like in an old New York Jewish voice?

What do you mean you can't have— okay, hold on. What do you mean you can't? It's kind of Midwestern, 'cause she's from New York, but it's like a Midwestern New York. She's like, what do you mean you can't have an orgasm? Like, seriously, you never touch yourself down there? I mean, it feels good. You ever get high? Maybe you should smoke a joint or something. You ever smoke a joint? Smoke a joint.

Explains so much. What?

You're relaxed. You're so fucking uptight.

Look at the little man in the boat.

What?

Look at the little man in the boat.

Exactly.

You gotta just flick it.

She looked at me like I was a Martian, like, because my mom—

She didn't show you or anything, did she?

No, but why don't they teach you? Because it's not so obvious to all women in sex ed or something. Like, and women play with themselves too, and it's totally fine.

You know what? When I was growing up, uh, it was very taboo for guys. And I noticed because I'm a I'm a camp counselor every summer, so I still deal with the youngins all the time, and I notice that they're all fairly open about it now. It's not like they're all guys.

The guys are.

So I think that maybe eventually the women will become.

I don't know, maybe that should be like my mission.

Maybe.

A new mission.

Make all women talk openly about sex.

I don't know, send a bunch of teens, I don't know, something. I do want to, I am going to start going around to college campuses and speaking and stuff. That's something, a goal of mine that I've had, and I'm going to start doing that, because I just think kids don't know.

You'll never go a month without getting banged if you start doing that, Em. I'm not sleeping with them.

Underage?

No, I mean, they're not underage.

That's a really bad idea.

You don't like the coeds?

No? I've never done that.

They're so eager to please.

I haven't slept with anyone— I never do that much younger. A little bit younger, but not that much. And that would be kind of sad.

Madison said something very upsetting to me moments ago. She said that girls nowadays are hypersexual to get guys' attention. I grew up in the AIDS era.

Oh.

They were not hypersexual at all.

Ah, 'cause everyone had AIDS.

The only girls that I ever slept with, they were always— 'cause we were all drunk.

Right.

So I only dated drunk girls.

Everyone only dates drunk girls in college. That's how you get laid.

Well, fucking high school too.

Oh, okay, high school too. But you're right, the AIDS scare. Did you guys ever get scared about AIDS in college and stuff?

Honestly, AIDS is one of those things that's like, we think it's kind of like extinct.

Oh, it's so not extinct!

I know, it's crazy, but like, I mean, yeah, we talk about like chlamydia and herpes is the one that gets me.

Herpes is the scary— they're more scared about herpes now than AIDS.

We're too old.

One, everyone has it.

And herpes is something you wear right on your face, so if you have it, everyone knows about it. So herpes is like— like the plague and no one wants it.

But wear condoms.

They come out with those crazy studies that are like, you know, 70% of people secretly have herpes. Yeah, it's like never share any drinks, right?

Exactly. It's like being in the plastic bubble.

Um, I'm with you, Madison. Actually, you left your, uh, your iced coffee in here and it looked really good, and I thought about taking a sip.

Aren't you glad you said no?

I'm like, no, might have herpes.

Madison, did you want to tell Andrew? No, I'm just kidding.

Yeah, well, and I don't have a breakout, so we're Okay, no breakout.

She's good. So, um, anyway, I don't know where the hell we're— oh, the clitoris again contains 8— is amazing too. I didn't mean again, I haven't mentioned this yet, only a thousand million times on other shows, but it has 8,000 nerve endings. And if you try to masturbate a few times and you get it or you don't get it, it takes— sometimes it can take a while, let's just say that, for you to get there. And once you get there, there's so many other ways you can orgasm as well. So women, spend time. It's the most important work you can do. And if you can't get there on your own, you can always use a vibrator. Toy, bring into the bedroom, whatever it is, there are no rules. 8,000 nerve endings. Whereas the p— no, it's too many. There's the penis, I think it's 3, I want to say it's like, well, maybe almost 3 times as many as a penis. Yeah.

Are you talking like square centimeter-wise or like— no, the entire penis, entire penis has like 2,000.

Yeah, no, I'm serious.

So 8,000 on the little tiny freaking clitoris.

The only reason the clitoris exists, that little love button, the only reason is for female pleasure.

Doesn't do anything else.

Doesn't do anything else. It serves no other evolutionary purpose except for to give women pleasure.

Well, because we need a reason to have sex other than to push babies out.

Exactly. So it's our incentive plan to have sex.

So, and then sadly, once the sex actually happens, it's not really involved at all.

Exactly. That's why you have to masturbate, because the typical male-female sex penetrative sex is that your penis goes in, out. A lot of men fast, and they do the jackhammer.

The jackhammer.

It does not hit the clitoris. It is nowhere near. And in fact, if you watch porn and she's screaming, give me orgasms, guess what? He's nowhere near her clitoris most of the time. How is she having an orgasm? She's not. So when you start having— maybe, yeah, you're right. Okay, sometimes she can have it. I'm just saying the clitoris— actually though, the most women need to have clitoral— have a clitoral orgasm before they can even have a G-spot orgasm. They have to be warmed up So this goes for the men too. Pay attention to the clitoris because not only is there like 8,000, there's quadrants to the clitoris. Like there's like that whole OMing group in San Francisco. If you heard of OMing, like they're orgasmic loves to stroke the clitoris for 15 minutes. They talk about the quadrant. So all I'm saying is get to know your own clitoris, teach it to your partner. Then for guys, you might just think that it's only about your hand. And like, I know I always talk about the Fleshlight and you're like, whatevs, I got my hand and it works fine and it's easy, but The flashlight, you know, every guy I've given one to is like, holy moly moly, that feels amazing. So also for guys, if you don't last as long as you want in bed, you know, you could try the stop-start method. And here's another thing I'm just gonna throw out there. Use a little lube, put it on your finger, put it in your butt, see how that feels. Just one time when you're masturbating. Not too hard. Or just start touching around your anus and just, you know, exploring other parts of your body. And for women too, your nipples. Because all these areas on your body can give you so much pleasure. And we get so stuck in these, like, for women, like 2, you know, 2 to 3 erogenous zones, and for men, usually just one. But there's a lot of pleasure to be had, is all I'm saying. So get to know your body. Okay everyone, thank you for listening to the show and supporting my sponsors. And speaking of toys and electronic objects that I have in my house, my new favorite is really the NoNo Pro. I do not masturbate with it, but the NoNo Pro removes all unwanted hair from everywhere you have on your body in an instant without pain, and it's long-lasting, and it is the very best way to remove unwanted hair. And it's for men too. So you got that hair on your back or those long neck hairs, or, you know, whether it's your legs, your arms, your face, it's so easy to use. I just like sit on the couch, I zap it away. And there is a— it's no no— it's nonoemily.com, and if they have like 100% 60-day money-back guarantee. So if you buy it and you're like, oh, I don't like getting rid of everyone— every unwanted hair pain-free for weeks, even months at a time, you know, you can return it. That's no-no-emily.com.

Oh, I just don't like this at all.

Why?

Getting rid of hair painlessly and affordably and conveniently.

I don't even—

I must send it back now.

Exactly. You never will. I'm just telling you because I freaking— I spent so much money on waxing and shaving and now I don't even do any more.

Like, I don't even get started on the blades.

I know, I'm gonna cure cancer now because I spent so much time getting waxed and doing it. Dude, I asked—

I need a no-no.

Can we write this up? He's texting me right now. I'm getting you a no-no, okay? I'm sorry. It's not for him, it's for his wife. You've already said that.

She's not hairy, just for the record.

No, no, I get it, but we all have hairs we want to remove.

Exactly, even my non-hairy wife wants the no-no badly.

I know, that's what I'm saying. Okay, dude, see, this sucks that guys— it's so hard. I'm sorry, or it's not hard enough, or, you know, that's a whole other issue.

Nowadays though, if I let my mind wander like that, it just, it goes away. Entirely.

Oh, see, that happens when you get a little older. Yeah, I hear you. You know, every single day I hear from friends who want to start a new venture. They have something they want to sell, or they want to write a blog, and they want to start a website, and they're so overwhelmed by it. But I have to tell you about Weebly.com. It is the coolest concept because it actually gives you the freedom to create like an amazing website for every— whatever you want to do. And any idea you have, you can implement in like 5 seconds with the Weebly website because it's so easy. You need no technical skills whatsoever. You drag and drop and they've hundreds of super modern designs to choose from. Plus, Weebly makes sure that your website works perfectly on web and mobile, which let me tell you is a pain because I'm working on that with my site now. No matter what kind of site you want for business or your portfolio or just to show your work and if you're ready to sell online, Weebly brings your ideas to life. We all know that making an idea come to life is very hard, but making a website for it should be easy. Create your free website today at weebly.com. That's W-E-E-B-L-Y dot com. Sweet! Okay. So here's the thing. We're moving on about sex ed. What do you want to know?

No, I don't want to yet.

What? Okay, what do you wanna know?

I gotta— I got the weirdness of the clitoris and the—

Oh, okay.

What do you wanna know about the clitoris? Place where it's at. 8,000 times. Now why, why wouldn't, because once you start the sex, you don't feel it, the woman doesn't feel it at all. Unless the guy's rubbing proper. Why hasn't it moved down through like years of evolution?

Some people actually, this is weird that I know this, but they, some people have it closer downward and they say that the further away your clitoris is from your vagina, the less chance you have of having an orgasm. I think some famous French woman, I wanna say like—

She was probably hairy.

I want to say— no, it wasn't like Marie Antoinette, but it was like someone along those lines. Someone did all this, all this research, tried to like move her clitoris.

Oh, right, I've heard. Right. Yeah, but it is true that the placement— some women can more easily have orgasms, like they can have G-spot orgasms easier. Like some women can have more orgasms easier with, you know— and also it's the way you move during sex. So what I was, what I was saying is that a lot of men typically just go in and out, in and out, in and out. But there's ways you can grind. There's like the cat position where you move around on her, right?

You've said that before.

In and out, then like it's more of like an up and down than it is the in and out.

You gotta like go up.

You gotta press on the—

Make yourself taller than her.

Right, on the piece, and the pubic bone, you know, and that reaches your G-spot. And women, if they just, you know, there's ways you can grind, and that's also the inner two-thirds of the woman's vagina is the most sensitive. And so, there's ways that women can move so she is hitting the clit, so they are hitting clitoris, or she could use her own hands, he could use his hands, you could use a toy.

Or if she's on top.

If she's on top, yeah, exactly, like—

Well, Madison said that the only reason why the clitoris even exists is to give you guys an incentive to have sex. That's insane. And then once we have sex—

to have pleasure.

Chances are, if the guy doesn't know what he's doing, that thing's not getting touched.

Well, that's why we started the first 65 hours of the show saying that women have to learn their own bodies, and they have to understand that their clitoris has so many possibilities, and just because it might not have worked for you in the past, you gotta keep working at it and trying to have that orgasm, and then also, just because you have one kind of orgasm doesn't mean you can't experience other kinds of orgasms, and then, once you know exactly how you need to be touched, on your clitoris, then when you're having sex, you move in that way so you can grind. Like a lot of women, you know, they grind. Have you ever had sex with a woman before, Anderson?

You have, I know. Yeah, they grind.

You don't have to talk about your wife, but let's go to your past. Your very far, far distant past.

Like a cat?

No, a cat.

Ooh, I realized the other day that cats, they're called pussies, I think, because they're very similar to girls. Why? I got a new cat, and like, it takes me forever to get this cat to like warm up to me and like be like sweet and kind. and she's really skittish and scared, and then once I finally got her to trust me, she's like almost sexual. She's like, oh, like rubbing on me, you know what I mean? And I'm like, that's probably where the word pussy comes from.

I don't know about that, but you know, I don't know that that's just like a feline thing. Women are like felines. I feel like a cat sometimes. Like when I purr, I do purr. Like if I get like touched and rubbed.

Because they're very similar.

I know, I get it, I totally get it.

I'm sorry, I just found it very curious that the clitoris wasn't, hasn't moved down further, but let's move on.

Right, no, and no, and again, there's a lot of, Women would— it is true that they're— it's easier for them to have orgasms when they're, you know, everyone's genetic body is different.

Yeah, it was Marie Bonaparte, uh, Napoleon's great-grandniece, who did all this research because she thought that women who had shorter distance between her— their clitoris and their vagina were more orgasmic. And so she said that— and it just— people are made differently. Every vagina is different, like, right?

Exactly, like snowflakes. We're all unique, right?

And so some people whose —clitorises are closer—they get moved around more during regular intercourse, which causes stimulation, so they orgasm. It doesn't even need direct contact. It just gets, like, tugged into orgasm. Right.

And those are the women who were, like, riding their bike when they were 5 and had an orgasm, and then there's women like me who were, like, 19 and didn't— never even—

Nicole Richie sits on a tile— cold tile floor in the bathroom, she told us, and that doesn't work.

She told us? Like, she called, texted us?

No, when she was on Loveline a while ago.

Oh, wow. See? No, I'm telling you this.

So she just sits on a floor in a bathroom and she's like, oh my God.

Yeah, it's like the luck of the draw. I'm telling you, there's the women who are like riding the horse, riding the bike, they just have, you know, they're walking down the street. I have women who are like, oh my God, I'm just walking, having a thought, I had an orgasm. And then there's some women, it's just more difficult. Challenges. Or it's, let's just say it's a challenge, it's more challenging. But just learn your body. We have to move on to these more basic basics, okay? Because the show is like, we've just got a few more minutes here. Here's the thing, you have the most important thing at the end of the day. Is to cultivate your sexual confidence. If there is nothing else that I have taught you and that you need to do is to learn how to have that confidence. Women get— okay, this is just for the women and then give guys tips. Women, a lot of women get very hung up on how they look, their orgasm face, what he's thinking. He's going to notice that she gained a pound, the way her boobs are moving, you know, that one breast is larger than the other. And they're in their mind, just like we were talking about men with orgasms, and they have to stop thinking and just start feeling. So if you find that you are in this place when you're having sex where you're really concerned about, like, you're in your head, you're just having any thought at all, even if you forgot to pick up your dry cleaning, then you're not in your body experiencing sex the way that you need to to have the best sex of your life. So if you get into your body, you will get more into the sex. Naturally. But if you're in the head the whole time, you're, I'm not gonna orgasm. How do I look? How do I feel? So again, that all goes back to the masturbation because once you master masturbation and you understand your body, then you will naturally have more confidence in bed because you'll be having more orgasms. You know how to ask for what you want. It's very empowering. Mm-hmm. And, um, you get turned on and you, what, what I was gonna say, uh, and also men find it sexy too, right? You were just saying, Anderson, that you've been with women in your past who didn't know their own body?

No, I was saying that they didn't care about mine.

Oh, is that what it was?

Really? No, but yeah, of course, I've been with girls. It's like when they just lay there, like they're scared, like just, uh, you know, I don't know what's going on.

Right, exactly. Okay, and then so, for the guys, here's the thing, that I know that a lot of men email me and they worry that they don't, they're like, well, you know, they're very specific, they're like, either they're virgins or they're already having sex and they want very specific techniques, like how do I do this, or how do I turn her on, or how do I kiss her, how do I perform oral sex, And here's the thing, every woman is different. Not only are their vaginas like snowflakes, every woman's— what turns her on is like snowflakes. Her body, the way she moves, her breasts, some women like them touched, some women don't. And so you have the opportunity with every person you're with to be present and in the moment and be paying attention to what makes her feel good. Because you can tell, like we show you, we're not like, you know, we're not like secretly like having the best time ever and we're just like lying there.

The first few times ever in your life you are.

Well, you're not enjoying it either.

And you're terrified. You just want to say you're like, terrified. It hurts.

You're like, what's happening? Is this bad? Am I going to get pregnant? Is my mom going to come home?

But then eventually you're like, oh, okay, you know, if your mom came home, she'd be like, you're doing it wrong.

She's like, what are you doing? Did you smoke a joint first? Really, Emily? You haven't even— you haven't tried to have a joint, then you might have an orgasm. Um, so, so the best practices are that every time you have sex, like, start again, because like the, the women's bodies are different, what they're going to ask for. And the most important thing is to go slow. Every guy should go 5 times slower than you think. Because I believe that most men got kind of shut down a lot and they're so excited to have sex, but they've also had a lot of rejection that they speed up the pro— and they're so freaking turned on, they just can't wait to stick it inside you that they're just, or they're afraid their erection's gonna go away, that they rush the whole process. And I think it even goes back to men masturbate, boy, little boys masturbating and they're afraid their mom's gonna walk in. So it's fast, fast, fast. But for women, it's slow, slow, slow. We wanna be slowly arouse and turn on. Not every single time, but most of the time. Good rule of thumb: 5 times slower than you think.

Yeah, also porn kind of messes with guys when it comes to that. They think everything needs to be like, and it's just like, ow, that's my vagina, right?

You're hurting. Hurts. We have pain. People have serious pain. Go to jail, you know, go to jail, go to the hospital. Pain hurts. Um, okay, grooming basics. We're back to the basics here. Um, cleanliness— you can't even say it— cleanliness is next to godliness should be your mantra in the bedroom. For men and for women, showering before a date, non-negotiable. And guys, wash your hands, especially after going to the bathroom, because we listen for the sink to be run. Do you, Madison? Do you listen for that? If you didn't wash your hands, I don't want you touching me, because that's how we're going to get diseases, okay? And that's how you have like— we just ate dinner, I can still smell the pasta on your hands, the whole thing. Like, wash your hands. And we're looking at your nails as well, because your nails can actually cause a lot of damage to us if you don't trim your nails, trim your cuticles. Um, there's nothing like staring down at a guy's like grubby hands and being like, what, jagged nails, that's gonna hurt me.

Um, you know what, that's funny that you say that because I had a girlfriend once, uh, who actually we were broken up, but we hadn't even been together for like a year, but we were having lunch and she looked at my fingernails and she said, every time a girl looks at your fingernails, she's just thinking, wow, that's really gonna hurt my vagina. Yeah, it's true. Is that what you guys really think when you're looking at people's fingernails?

I've had wounds. I've had sex wounds in my vagina because the guy, like, didn't cut his nails. Not many.

But you go straight to the vagina when you look at the fingernails.

First we look for the wedding ring. Assholes, same thing.

First you look at the wedding ring. No, I'm saying you look at the hands.

When you get old, you're like, oh, these nails are great.

Sharp wedding rings are no good?

And then you look at the nails, and if they're dirty and jaggedy, you're like, this isn't gonna work, you know? It's gonna hurt me and I'm gonna be in the hospital, and that won't be fun for anybody. And so also for the guys too, I gotta throw in a little shout out to my old Down Under Comfort. Make sure you're fresh and dry all day so you don't sweat and you're ready for action. So for women, okay, this is, this is the thing. I mean, grooming, you know what, here's the thing. I don't care if guys shave or not down there, honestly. I know that's like the trend and everyone's like shaving, right? Do what feels comfortable to you. And if your partner says, you know, honey, it's really uncomfortable, I'm trying to give you, the reason why I'm not giving you a blowjob anymore is because you're your pubic hairs in my mouth and I choke on them, you might want to cut them. But like, honestly, and I guess every guy trims now pretty much, or shaves.

No, not every guy. I just recently found out that guys can actually have hair on the shaft of their penis. I— yeah, a lot of them do. Oh my God, I didn't think that was a thing.

And was just like, because you're like, right, 20 or 24, and they've all shaved it.

Yeah, I was like, what is going on here? Like, there's actual long curly hair? Yes.

See, she doesn't know this. So what I'm saying is, now is the time to get rid of it. Yeah, I think it just Safe to say all around, a little manscaping, you know, never hurt anyone. Of course, unless you actually do hurt yourself and use some kind of razor or tools that are sharp. But here's the thing for women. This is something Madison and I were talking about on the show, and I was like, God, you know, I don't want this to come across the wrong way, but I gotta be honest. And I know no one taught me this, but really, before you're about to engage in sexual activity and you know what's gonna happen, we all know what's gonna happen, go to the bathroom and just like wipe up, clean up, use a little water on your hands. If there's a hand towel, wipe down. Like wipe yourself down and just make sure.

So every time you feel fresh, every time a girl says, let me go freshen up, she's prepping for sex.

She's probably washing her vagina.

What if we're in a restaurant when she says that?

No, she's probably putting lipstick on. If you're having sex, women should just, you know, and it's not because you're uncleanly and you're bad and you're dirty and whatever, but if you've had like a long day and you've gone to the bathroom or whatever, things happen, and it's nice to like carry baby wipes as fresheners. And in fact, I was talking to Madison about it and she had a very interesting story. About TPC. Yeah, um, TPC. Do you know what TPC is, Anderson? No clue. You're gonna love this.

Okay, so it is a, uh, a running thing, I guess, that guys talk about where girls have toilet paper crumbs. They go pee, they wipe, and they have tiny shreds of toilet paper. Yes, exactly, ladies, it is a thing. Guys talk about it. Girls talk about stuff about guys. Guys talk about toilet paper crumbs. It's a real thing, and it's super awkward when it happens to you, right?

And you don't know, like, you're gonna— you're out, you're drinking, having fun, you're like, oh, I didn't know that there was a little toilet paper or whatever. So just You know, wipe up, be clean down there. Yes. If a vagina— tell me that you've never— was abroad. Have you ever seen it?

I didn't try and say that. If vagina was like Europe, I would have like spent many— logged many months, you know, traveling across Europe in my lifetime. Never come across TCP.

You've never ever— oh my God, you're not kidding me.

Well, there has been a lot of drunken— drunk the most times.

Were you ever staring in the face. How often do you stare into the face of vagina? Lots. With the lights on?

Lots. So whenever we have the opportunity, we like to do it that way. Really? Okay, plenty. Yeah. So let's talk about this though.

Has there ever— forget that if you've never seen the trail of paper crumbs, toilet paper crumbs— have you ever just been with a woman where sometimes it's great and sometimes it's maybe not as fresh?

Oh yeah, it's not always fresh and nice down there. I've never seen remnants.

Thank God you've been safe.

That's good. And I've logged lots of hours.

I hope you never do. I don't wish—

now if I do, it's divorce time.

I'm saying is, you know what, just it can't hurt to use a little towel in the bathroom. It takes 2 seconds.

Okay, when I said now it would be divorce time, what I'm saying is the only way I would ever see that is if it was another girl and she would divorce me, because my wife would never ever have TPC. She's so clean.

I'll have to talk to her.

We didn't even get to our emails and we gotta wrap up, but this was a good show. This was, this was really important information.

I butted in and upset you a number of times. Number of times.

You didn't even upset me. I always think I upset you too, but you know what, Anderson, I think we're—

I think we're in love.

Yeah, we're so good. We love each other. Um, Madison, you're awesome. Thanks for being here and, uh, talking about toilet paper crumbs, which, um, I kind of feel like now I feel like a bad feminist or something like that. But really, I think women just clean, you know, men and women take care of yourself. And, uh, women— oh, as far as shaving, we didn't talk about that either. Don't let your guy pressure you into it if it's what you feel comfortable doing. Again, if, you know, don't be pressured to do anything you don't want to do with your own body. A lot of people do trim these days, and a lot of women, and I know personally that when you do take care of the hair, sometimes it's more easy for you to orgasm and to achieve orgasm. It just feels better. Some women, they don't like it. They don't like the hair going back in, and they don't like it. So, make your own decisions about it. And that's what I gotta say about that. Ah, okay. Thank you. Thank you, Anderson. Thank you, Madison. And everyone, follow me on Facebook and Twitter and Instagram if you wanna see some sexy things and learn a thing or two about having better sex. Thanks everyone for listening to Sex with Emily. Was it good for you? Email me feedback@sexwithemily.com. Promescent. You guys, sometimes, you know, you don't last as long as you want, and it's okay because women take a really long time to orgasm. I feel for you men. Even if you only last 6 minutes and you want to last 12 minutes, you can try Promescent. It is the only FDA-approved treatment for lasting longer in bed or for premature ejaculation. If you happen to ejaculate before you want to, in a minute, it could even be 10 minutes, it will double the time that you last in bed, might even triple it. And you don't have to do all those crazy, like, oh, better think about baseball, better think about— what do you think about? My friend told me you thought about dead rats in a trash can.

I've done— what? I've done math.

Really? Like, you do math equations so you don't come?

Yeah, I think about, uh, stuff that— well, this is like geometry, right? Thinking about stuff like that I have to do tomorrow, that kind of thing.

So you don't orgasm. So then you take yourself out of the moment and you're not appreciating having sex with your partner because you don't want to orgasm. So you could use Promescent and enjoy your partner's hot body. That's Promescent. You can click on the banner for my website, sexwithemily.com, or go to promescent.com. Pretend she's a dude sometimes. Okay, so Anderson, um, I'm getting a new car, and in the past I have to tell you that I— when I got my last car, I was actually dating this guy. I didn't like him very much, but I kept sleeping with him just so he would help me buy the car. No, I needed a new car and I'm not great at car shopping. I'm a chick, they want to take advantage of me.

I don't know, they see you guys coming.

I know. So I said to him, I was like, hey, would you take me car shopping? And he was like really into it because he wanted to date me.

He wanted to prove that he's a man. Exactly. So did he get you a good deal though? He got me—

no, he got me a really bad deal.

You thought it was a good deal?

I thought it was a good deal.

Everyone thinks it's a good deal at one point or another when that guy's going back and he's like, oh, let me talk to my manager and see if that's doable. And then they come back like, it's doable, but you have no idea, you have no clue.

And then going crazy and you're talking to a million places. So TrueCar.com is changing car buying forever, and I'm using it to get my new car right now. TrueCar users receive negotiation-free guaranteed savings. Some features are not available in all states. In the first 3 months of this year, over 126,000 cars were sold by the TrueCar certified dealer network. Anderson, it's so freaking easy. It just takes the guesswork. You just plug in the car you want and then you get the price and then the whole thing.

There's no more haggling. The haggling— nothing. I'm a terrible haggler. I'm not, I'm not an agent.

I know. I'm not an agent. TrueCar users save an average of $3,078 off MSRP. When you're ready to buy a car, just follow these 3 easy steps. First, you go to TrueCar.com, find out what other people paid for the car you're looking for, which is so cool. Then register at TrueCar.com to see upfront pricing information and lock in your savings. Third step, so simple, you print out your TrueCar savings certificate, take it to a TrueCar-certified dealer for a better hassle-free car buying experience. Remember, every day TrueCar users receive negotiation-free guaranteed savings. Save time, save money, and never overpay. Visit TrueCar.com today. That's TrueCar.com.