One Virgin, Two Subs, and a Threesome

Stop what you're doing and listen closely because Bellesa and I are giving away free spicy toys or gift cards to every single one of you. That's right. Everyone who signs up wins something. And if you haven't heard of Bellesa, let me put you on. They're a bi woman for everyone company that's completely flipping the script on sexual wellness. And now they're hooking you up. You've definitely seen Bellesa's viral toys all over your for you page. Like the rose, it blew up for a reason. This little flower shaped suction toy is iconic. Or. Or their famous whisper collection. You know, the first fully ever silent vibrators. If you live with roommates, parents, or even if your partner is sleeping right next to you, these toys are silent without compromising power. Or their new Pebble Pro. They just one up their best selling pebble with a stronger, smarter and seriously spicy redesign. Ballast has somehow figured out how to engineer a one stop pleasure shop with three interchangeable heads. It sucks. It humps. It licks. It vibrates. I'm speechless. And of course I had to hook all of you up. So my friends at Bellesa are sending out free toys or gift cards for toys to everyone who signs up. You heard that right. Every single one of you wins something. Just click the link in the episode description or head to bbvibes.com Emily that's B B V I B E S.com Emily. Hey everyone. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily on today's show. I'm here with Anderson and we're taking your calls about sex, relationships, everything in between. Topics include a self sabotaging virgin, what to do when you want a threesome and your guy doesn't. Separating our fantasies from our reality. And how two submissives can have dominating sex in the bedroom.

We're doing all those calls.

All this and more. Yeah.

Sweet.

Thanks for listening.

Look into his eyes.

They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that block our sacred institutions.

Bedroom eyes they call them in a bygone day. Hey Emily.

Boyfriend. Cuz, my man E here, he just.

Got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.

A girl's gotta have her standards. Oh my.

The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common knowledge?

What do you mean?

Like laundry? It shrinks.

Can we not talk about sex so much?

Are you kidding me?

Oh my God. I feel so good.

Being bad feels pretty good. Well, you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

You're listening to sex With Emily, we're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com, where you can easily subscribe to the podcast and you'll never miss an episode again. Because we do two podcasts a week, you can also subscribe to the newsletter. You can do a lot of things on the website. Listen to the show, hang out. Hi, Anderson.

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Hello there.

Thanks for having me.

Thanks for having me. I'm so fun.

My favorite kind of show, too. The calls.

Showers. Yeah.

Love the calls.

Bringing back the calls. I love the calls. We've got some great ones lined up today, which are going to be awesome.

Offended if I say I don't want to talk to you anymore? I want to talk to the calls.

Yes.

Can we get right into it?

Yeah, a little bit.

Or do you want.

I just want to say, yeah, no, we don't need to talk. I'm actually really excited, but I do want to tell people, the amazing listeners, that I love you and that it's really great. If you want to follow me on Twitter, it's true. I should give them reasons. It's fun. Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat's a great tweet. Instagram. I have little stories going on my Insta stories. It's all Sex with Emily. As always, you can send us your questions, email us, call us. Go to the Sex with Emily website.

Text your questions 797979 and then put sex with Emily. All one.

No, no, that's wrong.

What?

Dude, it's seven nines.

797979.

And then text Ask Emily.

Oh, ask Emily. Ask Emily.

Maybe you should talk to me.

What happens to Sex with Emily? What happens there? They just go into oblivion.

To oblivion. Emily. Yes. If you text 7979, Emily one word, you automatically get a reply. That is a link to send in your question. Do it right now.

And I gotta test it right now.

While you're testing that, we're gonna get to the calls, though. You guys, I'm so excited for today's show. Let us know what you think. Doing a lot of different kinds of shows. We've got guests, we've got callers, the emails. And I love hearing from you and getting your questions, but also let us know which shows you're enjoying. Okay? We love you. Thanks for being here, Anderson. This is going to be fun. Okay, we're going to take a quick break. Thank you so much to our sponsors. Thank you for supporting them. You know, I only talk about products and services that I Use and that I use. I sign off on that I love and I hope you love them too. Thank you everyone for listening. We'll be right back.

Okay, now we're really onto your calls. If you do have a call, like I said, you can text me. That's really easy. You can also just go to the website sex with emily.com, click on the Ask Emily tab and send your question that way. And then there's a little box today, like we said, it's a call show. You can check the box and say, yes, I'd like to be called. And we will set that up for you. But whenever you email me a question, just please include your age, where you live and how you listen to the show. And we can't wait to hear from you. We're excited. Okay, we have William. He's 28 from Maryland and he says he's a self sabotaging virgin. Hi, William, I'm here with Anderson.

Hey, Will.

Hey, how's it going?

Can we call you Willie?

Yeah, sure, why not?

Feels more comfortable. How you doing? I'll tell you, William.

I'm doing, I'm doing great. I'm doing great today. A little nervous, but yeah, no, it's okay.

Just be. Just take a few deep breaths. We're happy to be talking to you. So tell me a little bit about.

What'S going on.

Overall. I mean, like I said when I wrote to you, in a nutshell, I'm a 28 year old virgin who's never been in a relationship before. And at this current state in my life, that really shouldn't be a problem. But I am so used to being the person who I once was that I tend to self sabotage any relationship or any connection I attempt to have.

What does self sabotage mean to you, Will?

I mean, for one, I always tend to make excuses. If I feel like something is getting serious or getting around that route, I panic. And not literally. Well, sometimes literally I run. And who's the person that you were.

Before you said you was based on what you. How you used to be?

Oh yeah. Extremely depressed. I was a very depressed kid. Didn't really have much friends. Didn't really know who I was as a person I was. Yeah, I was just very lost. Got my life together and I honestly the per. Like I'm not the person I once was. But the insecurity is definitely still there.

So we got to work on the insecurity. Right. Okay, so now we've created, you know, and you're like, okay, so I'm self sabotaging. Every time I meet someone, it's not going to work out. And you have all these feelings that you're just. It's like a comfortable blanket. It's like, what? You know, like, that's your story. You're the virgin and you can't meet somebody and you're free to being rejected and all these things. So we have it all laid out for you, so we know what that is. And so now it's like changing your activities and your thought patterns are going to get you back, are going to get you on the right track right now. I think we can start it today. I do. William, like, I feel like this is a turning point, first of all, that you called in and that we're talking about it. And so right now your life is on track, right? I mean, you're not that kid anymore. You know, you've got a job, you've got friends, you've good life, right? So everything's going great for you. And so how do you typically meet people? Or like, what do you do for fun? What's your life like?

What do I do for fun? I train in mma. So usually at my gym, I meet people there. I barely go out unless it's on Saturday nights. But by weekdays, I go work, straight to the gym, home, sleep, rinse, repeat.

What do you do for work?

I'm sorry?

What do you do for work?

Oh, I am a media specialist. I'm a video editor, actually.

You don't meet the world? Yeah. Gay or straight?

Straight.

Okay.

Okay. Yeah. I mean, I feel like this is about a conferencing and this is like rewiring those. Those negative things that you're telling yourself and the stories about what you want and what you can have and who you are. So you are in this different place and it's experience. It's really just the practice of, I would say with these invitations and things you get invited to, like, we all get like those Facebook invites or people are. It's are inviting you to go to, like to dinners. Just like, start saying yes to those things, even if you don't have time. I understand that you're training, but if you're going out one night a week, I don't know what you're doing. But make it a night where you're going out to like a place where your friends are around or where you feel comfortable. Because right now you don't have a lot of the experience of just being in an environment, just walking up to people and talking to them. So if you say yes These invites to a party or a barbecue where you wouldn't normally go, but you got invited, so you already know people there. And then you show up and you just really just you're yourself and you start talking to people, making friends, making connections. And I think you have to grow your community and your space that you're living in, and then you'll feel more comfortable starting to talk to people. But you just got to start somewhere and take the pressure off yourself. Like, if you could just start saying, like, I'm building my life now as a, you know, as a 28 year old who's got a job, who's healthy, take care of myself, and I want to start building this, you know, community of people around me who support me and make me feel good and I have confidence. And you'll start meeting people. That's the first thing. Because I think if you isolate, you're in this pattern. And in your pattern, you're telling yourself you're going home. You're saying, I'm this, you know, dork, I've never had sex. That you got to just start changing your, your environment. And that'd be one way to do it.

Right? Yeah, I, I can agree with that. Definitely is just. It definitely is easier said than done. But yes, I just.

Once a week, one thing, like, it's not a whole. It's like one event. It's one thing differently that you're gonna do. Right?

Right.

And then when you ask people, like, literally, it doesn't have to be a huge date where you're going out, and it's like, you know, people don't. Women don't even need like this whole where you're, you know, making dinner and you're doing this.

Well, things could be like coffee to begin with.

At the parties.

Saturday night, you go out your friends to like a bar. What does that look like?

Yes. Usually every Saturday we go to the.

Local watering hall, so you see the same people there.

That's why I said say yes to things that are not typical to what he's doing already.

And listen, William, I know in your head you probably think that you're like one of the only people that feels this, like, nervousness. And especially with doing new things and walking into a room, how you wish that you, you weren't as nervous as you were like. And everyone else does a much better job at it. I can tell you that Emily and I are not that much more comfortable than you are. When we walk into a room, everyone's a little bit awkward. Sounds like you probably don't drink, so you don't have that on your side.

No, but it's a practice and we all have to get.

You got to. You got to practice it and, you know, you just got to have a swagger and know that you're an mma. Training the mma. I mean, that gives you a whole lot to talk about. Especially the ladies are going to like, hearing about that stuff, and you have a good job, and I'm sure that you have stories from that. You have plenty of things to talk about. So I don't quite understand why you retreat back to your old self. I mean, we all become different people. The question that I have, I guess, is about your depression. Was it clinical depression? Are you being treated for it? Are you on medication?

It was more of a. I don't know, you say environmental.

Environmental depression. So it sounds like you had a pretty tumultuous. I was in, like, growing. Like you grew up and this is where you get. Came. Where your intimacy, like, fears came from. Probably in the environment.

Exactly.

So, I mean, like we say with almost every call, like, really, therapy is where you got to really start with this thing most.

Yeah. I mean, have you ever had therapy? Such a fan.

Yeah. I mean, I've had counseling before. Yeah, I know I could be considered two different things, but counseling I've gone to over again. I've never been to actual, like a foreign therapist.

The psychiatrist you might want to think about.

Exactly. Especially if you experienced depression in the past. And a lot of what. I mean, a lot of things that we talk about on the show and in life are really about, like, a lot of our greatest challenges are because of the. The negative voices in our head or the stories that we believe about ourselves that are not true and that we keep telling ourselves over and over and over again. And it builds these grooves in our brain and it's comfortable that you're the ugly duckling. You know, you have these insecurities, you've been depressed, girls don't like you. And that's the story. It's playing and playing and playing. And so I could give you. And I've talked about on the show, there's a lot of different things you can do, and it all sounds very overwhelming, but really there's, you know, people journal, they write down all the negative. You know, these are the negative things I believe. And here's the flip side, the positive. And every morning or every night when you go to bed, you, like, read that list and you notice in your brain when you're saying these things to yourself, and you flip it. You're like, you're going to say one positive thing, right? You can meditate on it. You can visualize it when you're going to bed at night. You can picture yourself walking into this room where you have the confidence. I mean, there's different exercises, but that's really what it's all about. That's the good news, William. The good news is that your biggest setback right now is coming from you. And it's something that you can control. Like, you've got everything going for you. So it's just make. I'm trying to have you put little positive things in place that will help you switch the fabric of the way that you're thinking and the way you're living your life. So that's why I was saying, one day a week, go to do something that you've done before. Get comfortable telling your stories and building your confidence. And I think writing it down does help, like journaling, like, positive things about yourself that you feel good about. And you keep reading those messages over again because eventually, in saying them to yourself, they will replace that tape in your head. Okay.

Okay.

Yeah.

Positive thinking.

Those are the two things. Yep. Positive. Positive thinking therapy can help because a lot if you might still have some kind of depression, because a lot of times it might be something more deep seated here. But, you know, it does help to write, actually write down all those negative things that you say, and then you flip it and you tailor these messages to, I am a confident, strong. You know, I. William, like, I. I'm so proud of these things I've accomplished, and this is who I am. That's who you really are. And then when you believe that in every fiber of your being, that's who you're going to be presenting out in the world. So it's not just like, oh, the sun is shining and life is so great. It's like kind of a deeper level positive thinking, if you will. And that's really what's gonna work. I promise.

And William, real quick, Emily can probably agree with me here. What we're hearing right now is a confident, happy, easy to talk to person. And I. I know I talk to people on the phone all the time. And a lot of the time it's like, oh, God, this person. I'm not gonna talk to this person much, because they don't really have much to say. You can tell that they're, like, nervous or they're, like, inside their own head.

Yeah, you're not that guy.

You're not that guy.

Yeah, I feel it.

So whether you. Whether you feel like you are that guy, that's not how you come off.

Yeah, this isn't bullshit here. I'm not. Because if there was something else going on, I'd tell you that. I'd be like, well, it sounds like you really know your student. You're the man, and you're the only one who doesn't believe it yet, so let us know how that goes. William, I want you to go answer one of those invites on Facebook or wherever you get invited. Things that you didn't think you'd go to. I want you to go to that and just start talking to people. Okay? That's how connections are made in the community. All right, do that. Thanks, William. Thanks for calling. I so appreciate it. Thanks for your honesty.

Get him. Get him, Will. Just for the sake of time and brevity. I didn't get into his childhood, but I really wanted to know. I wanted to know what kind of abuse it was.

Here's the thing.

You know, but.

But we don't. You're right. And we can all dwell.

I didn't want to take him back there either, because I could tell how painful.

You know what? It doesn't. He. He could deal with that. But we all want to know the whys and the whys. Whatever. Our parents did all these things to us. Fine. At some point in life, you know that you learn that and you move on. You take it and you're like, you can't blame.

Otherwise, you're a victim. We got enough victims in the world.

No victim mentality. Don't delve back into that. Have an understanding, move forward, make positive steps to have a fulfilled.

I would never guess that that was that guy's problem. Talking to him. He's hearing his voice. I mean, he just seemed like a happy, nice, you know, confident guy.

Right? And we all. And you're right, though, Anderson, that we. We are going to go on to another call. But we. We all do this. And I was sitting here across from you, thinking, you know, we've talked about this, Anderson. We both go through this. We'd sit outside Loveline, and you were, like, hard on yourself about your movie and how when you get the movie done, and I. You beat yourself up for being where you're at in life that you haven't done.

It's all from childhood. It's all childhood.

Right. And I like Anderson. No, do it. We're doing the movie and look at it. You've done it. It happened. It's like. But the only thing holding back was those thoughts you had. And I've done it to myself. So sabotaging. We get it. And look where you are. Look where I'm at.

It's still a struggle across from you. Love it in Hollywood.

Okay, we have Emily. She's 21. Another Emily. Another Emily.

I don't know if we can do this. This is good.

One Emily is really intense.

Hi.

Hi, Em. We can call you Emily from 21 from Kentucky. I'm with Anderson.

Hi, Emily, 21 from Kentucky.

And it's good time. Emily's are cool chicks. And Emily, thank you for writing in. Thank you for calling in.

Yes, and no problem. I'm so excited that you answered yes.

Here I am. We want to help you. I know. You're so bubbly. You seem. You seem happy. Em. See Emily's worker.

I am really happy.

That's good.

My senior year of college, I'm doing great.

I didn't graduate college till I was 29.

Yeah, good for you, Em. You're already ahead of the game. So m. I'm calling you. Em, the question is, you wanna know about a threesome that you actually are interested in Threesome. And your boyfriend not so much. So tell me what's going on.

Yeah. Okay. I've been with him for like three years and I basically in the past year have started to bring up that I want to have a threesome. And he didn't seem like against it, but he also just seemed like really scared, to be honest. Like, he kind of just got like red in the face and was like.

That sounds hot. But oh my God. What? Like he really was not sure about it.

Is he your age as well?

No, he is two years older than me.

Okay. But still 23. So he's still trying to figure out sex with you? Probably. And he's like, oh, my God, you want to bring another person in? Like, what are we going to do? So it's probably confusing to him and overwhelming and maybe somewhere it's a fantasy, but not yet.

Let's just make sure that everything's out on the table. Like, you're talking about bringing a girl in, right? Not a guy?

Yes. And he's aware, like, I'm bisexual and like I have always been and he's aware of that. So, like, I guess it's not a huge shock, but I think it still took him off guard.

Right. And does he know. How did you say it? Like, he knows you're bisexual, but you've been together for two years, three years. Have you been with women in these last three years?

No, I have in high school, like, but not, you know, I haven't had, like, sex with other women. I've just, like, made out and, you know, done stuff at parties, I guess. But it's not been like, was he.

Around when that happened? Was he around when you made out? Was he around when you were making out these women at parties? Last three years?

No, that was actually. It was before.

Okay, so for three years. So here's the thing. You haven't cheated in your mouth. So what you're saying is you just said to him, hey, babe, so I'd like to have a threesome. And after three years, and yes, he knows you're bisexual, but it hasn't come up in three years. So he might be feeling, like, threatened or that he wasn't pleasing you or, you know, who knows what he was thinking? I'm not sure how you brought it up to him. What did you say exactly?

I can't remember when. The last time I brought it up, but the first time, I mean, when I brought it up, I pretty much just said, like, hey, how would you feel about doing this? Or, like, what do you think about them? Or, like, I think we were watching. What's the show called? We were watching a show on Netflix, and there was, like, a scene with a threesome. And I, like, purposely put it on.

Good.

I knew the scene was going to be there.

Great way to do it.

What do you think about this?

Where do you stand on the threesome topic? And he was like, okay. And then you got Right. That's a good way to bring it up. If you haven't brought it up, I get it. But it sounds like he's gotten kind of nervous about it. So I think you should say to him, listen, I think it would be really hot. I've been, you know, I love having sex with you. It's been amazing these three years. And I, you know, I've been with women in the past, and I've been fantasizing about it. And I would love to be with a woman and with you and kind of break it down for him how it would go. Because he's probably never had a threesome, doesn't know what you want from it. Does he have to be with the other woman? So you guys have to discuss these boundaries and together and, you know, create the rules, the boundaries, how you both visualize it, the goals, your goals, your dreams, your goals. So he probably just isn't. And he might say to you, though, you have to be prepared. You might say, you know what? I'm not interested. Like, I don't want you to be with anyone else.

Hey, Emily.

Yeah?

Emily.

Oh, which Emily?

Em from Kentucky?

Yeah.

You know you're not gonna marry this guy, right?

I don't know. Maybe.

You know that, like, this relationship's gonna end probably soon after you're out of college, if, if not before that. Right? You know?

Why do you think that?

Because, I mean, if you have this threesome, I mean, it's not going to be the guy you marry. You're not going to have a threesome with the guy.

I don't think that's why. That's not.

Are you going to be able to be cool with him? Like going down on another girl in front of you or the penetration part, Is that going to freak you out?

I mean, I've never had a threesome before, and I want to say that I would be cool with it, but I don't have a way of knowing how I would.

Right.

I think that whether you realize it or not, like, you're kind of know, you know, that your college experience is kind of winding down, you know, that you're probably going to graduate college, move on, and you, you want to kind of put a bow on this relationship. And I think that's where this is coming from.

I don't know. Okay. Emily, is that true?

I don't know if you know it.

No, I. No, I love him very much. I don't. I don't want to leave him or anything like that.

Okay. But I know what you're saying, Anderson. No, here's the thing. That's another subject.

We've got to talk about me a number of times. Every time it was at the end of the relationship.

I get it. And you're right. This is a pattern. That's. But I heard Emily's response that. And I wanted to check with her, see if it was just like a defensive thing. But no, Emily loves him. She wants to be with him. She wants to expand their sexual repertoire. They're, you know, their experiences together, as a lot of long term couples do. And so I think that it's a matter of we don't know what's going to happen in their. In their relationship.

Huge, huge risk here. Because when you open Pandora's box, well, that's why she needs more thought.

Well, no, I like that you brought her.

I might not be able to have sex with, with you anymore unless there's another vagina in the room. Like that. That, that is A possibility, like, he might get so into it that it's.

Just, like, there's a lot of strange. I mean, there's a lot of things that could happen. It's true that. That threesomes is not just something you do to spice up your sex life. It's like having a baby. You're like, let's have a baby and things are better. Let's have a.

We heard a call on Loveline years ago where a girl wanted to threesome really badly with her boyfriend, and they used her friend, her really good friend. And as soon as her boyfriend started having sex with her friend, she punched her boyfriend right in the nose because it was so shocking and upsetting to her. Once it actually happened, she wasn't prepared for it. And she broke his nose, like, while he was having sex with her friend.

Oh, my God.

You gotta really be prepared. You're still young.

Well, this can be. The way you could figure it out is a lot of couples, you know, you don't have to jump, first of all, you do have to talk about it. You do have to set, like, is there gonna be penetration? How are you gonna find the third person? You guys aren't even really there yet. But if, let's say he does agree to it, then there are some, you know, there is that process of talking through what's, you know, protection and how to find the person. But right now, I think if you want to revisit this, like I said, with your boyfriend, in a way that's just getting. Giving him a little more information and having more discussion about it, because I don't think he's totally shutting it down again. He can't really visualize and explain it. You gotta say, listen, I think it'd be hot. I'm not really sure how it would look, but how would you feel if I was with a woman and you were, you know, you were there in the room, and would you want to have sex with her? You know, you guys just got to talk about it in more detail. And so he can picture it because he really. I think he probably just didn't know where it was coming from. And he might have felt, like, inadequate. Yeah.

If he's an insecure guy, he's immediately thinking, oh, what am I doing wrong? Am I not doing it right? You know, but worst case scenario for him is he says no. And then you guys do end up breaking up. And, you know, I'm telling you, 20 years from now, he's gonna be thinking of what could have been.

How. How's Your sex life right now, Em.

Oh, it's great. It's fine. It's always been ever since the first time we ever had sex.

That's amazing. I'm happy for you. That's really cool. That's great. So you're having great sex. And so it sounds like if you guys are having great sex, you're probably really good communicators. You understand your body, you're getting your needs met. So I feel like you just got to have a really honest conversation with them. About what? The threesome. Really? What it really meant and why you're thinking about it. And you guys will be good. Keep talking, don't jump into it.

And Anderson, not every guy is cut out for this. Not every guy should handle the threesome.

And here's the other thing, sweetie. If he says I'm not into it, you're not going to convince him. Just like I tell men all the time who are like, why won't my girlfriend do it? You're never going to convince her unless it has. Unless she really wants to.

And Emily, would you be okay? He said not into it. And you, like, end up with this guy and you can never ever hook up with a girl again. Is that something you could live with?

No, probably not.

So these are the. These are the questions you're gonna get answered now through this conversation, Em. So I think it's great it came up because I think it's gonna have you thinking about your relationship long term and what you really want. Because you're 21, you're still trying to figure it out. You don't have as much experience dating, you know, you just don't like. It's been three years with him. So I think this is a great time for you to kind of really think about what you. What turns you on, your values, how you picture your relationship and everything unfolding in the next few years.

Hey, Em, that's really smart. I never thought about that.

Yeah, think about it. It's good. We gotta evaluate all this stuff in our lives. You know, jobs, you're graduating from college, where you wanna live in your relationship. So it's a good time to do it. Okay, Em, let me know how it goes.

Good luck. Break up with them lightly. Be careful with them.

Top and Anderson, Bye. Of course. Have a great day. Bye. Our next call is Laura. She's 21, from Nevada and she wants to talk about fantasies versus her morals. Hi, Laura, I'm here with Anderson and we are here for you. Tell us what's going on.

Hey.

Hi.

Hey, how's it going?

Good. We are here for you. So Anderson gets your email. So tell us a little bit about what's going on.

Okay, well, first of all, like, thank you so much for having me on your show.

So I. My question has to do with. Okay, so I explained in my message that I, like, since I was, like, when I was younger and, like, just starting to have, like, fantasies and sort of sexual thoughts was, like, I used to feel really guilty about it. And that was something that, like, my mom, like, always worked through with me, which I was really lucky about. But I. And now I'm like, an adult and, like, I love fantasizing and everything. I've started to wonder, like, as I become more daring with my fantasies and, like, sort of played with, like, the forbidden and, like, things in real life I would feel really guilty about, but in my fantasy life are kind of fun and exciting. I started to wonder what I felt now and then. Also, I'll feel guilty about those fantasies even though, like, Laurel. Even though they're not, like, they're toning reality.

One fantasy. What are the fantasies?

The moral line.

Right, right. I get it. I get. I get where you're going with this, Anderson.

What are some examples? Give one example of, like, the one that you're most ashamed of. How about that?

I'm the most ashamed of. Oh, God, I don't know, Anderson.

That's not okay.

How about a middle one? We have to figure out example. But in an example.

Yeah. Okay. Like, an example would be, like, I'm a teacher. And, like, I'm not. I'm not actually a teacher, but, like, in my, you know, fantasy, I'm a teacher and, like. Or I'm a student. Like my. Yeah, like, I'm a student, and my teacher, like, wants to. To, like, you know, fuck me. And I'm like. And he. And like, in my mind, like, it's sexy not just because I'm, you know, like, that fantasy is pretty classic. Like, student wants the teacher, but, like, sort of the sexy part is that, like, the teacher wants me. And that's, like.

Right.

Given to that, like, forbidden desire, you know, but, like, also I feel kind of guilty about it because there's a whole age thing and, like, society that's sort of frowned upon, like, breaking.

Exactly. So. So here's the thing. Well, you talked about when you were younger. Let's just go back to that real quickly. So I clarify this. You said when you were younger, your mom talked to you about feelings of shame around sex, and she helped you Work through it.

Would you go to your mom and say, hey, Mom, I have these fantasies about banging teachers. And she'd be like, it's okay, honey.

Well, you know what? Like, I was so confused about, like, I think everyone mih puberty was sort of having the same feeling, but I really didn't understand. I was really confused about it. And so my mom and I have such an open relationship. I eased into it. But I sort of did approach her.

With, how did she tell you?

Like, the coolest person ever.

Yeah, that's awesome. And she said, and hopefully she explained to you, which is what I'm going to tell you, is that. That there is a difference between the fantasies that you actually want to happen and then the fantasies that you just have, you keep to yourself, but they turn you on and they make you feel good. And it's actually really, really healthy. I can tell you, Laura, that the women who have robust, active, you know, textured fantasy lives have better sex throughout their lifetime. And some women can't even come up with a thought. They can't even think about it.

And I work with women.

Yeah. And I'm telling you that it's not. You're not doing anything wrong. There's no sex police that's going to come and knock on your door and throw you in some kind of sex junction in case you want that kind of thing to happen in your fantasy. But really, it's all healthy and it's okay. And you're 21 years old and you're figuring out your sexuality right now and what turns you on. And I think it's great, actually, that you are experimenting with these things and figuring out what you like. And the reason why this can be helpful is because. Well, for so many things. But it's so important to know your body and to masturbate. And when you're having sex, you'll be more likely to ask for what you want and have orgasms or whatever your goals are. But the reason why it's also important is because what you could learn from these fantasies, let's say the ones that you don't necessarily even want to happen, is that you're like, oh, but I really like feeling adored or feeling like I want my partner, you know, My partner. Yeah. And the chosen one. And that my partner, you know, has this unbridled desire for me and he has to have me and take me right now, which is a really common female fantasy. So maybe when you're with a partner, eventually you'd be like, oh, well, let's Do a little role playing and, you know, and you could role play the teacher student thing, and that's completely healthy as well. You know, it's not like you want that to happen, but you might want to bring that into your relationship. Couples do it all the time. And I think you'll just know, and that will turn you on. And that's totally. Again, it's all healthy and fine. And I'm glad, I think that this call is actually going to help a lot of listeners who still carry shame around and judgment around what they think about what turns them on. Like, I'm just so glad that people are having these, are having thoughts and having good sex.

Laurel sounds like she's a thinker, and she's probably morally sensitive, it sounds like. Right? And let me tell you this, Laurel, whatever fantasy you have, and I feel like you kind of give us a softball with the teacher scenario. I'm sure that she started out with.

She was the teacher giving that to Anderson.

She was the teacher and she was going after the students. That's where she started. So maybe that is one of her fantasies. Let me tell you this. No matter. And I do this all the time because I think horrible thoughts sometimes and I write horrible things down because I'm a writer and I think of just awful scenarios for human beings to be in that I hope to make movies out of one day. And I feel guilty about these sometimes. And I can tell you that anything that you think of, anything that you dream up, has not only been thought about by other people, but acted on by other people. So you're fine, all right? Don't worry about it. You're human and you're. You're creative person, obviously. And like Emily said, it can. It's very healthy. And don't feel unless. I don't know if you have any idea what guys look at on the Internet, but most guys, at least once a week, turn off their Internet in total shame and guilt after what they just looked at.

Okay, yeah, I've heard they do.

They do. So it's like, you know, I prayed.

For some girls after I'm done. I'm like, oh, my God, that poor girl. What was I just watching?

Exactly. But these are the unhealthy reactions that a lot of us have to sex that prevent us from having really healthy, great sex lives that we all, like, are so hard on ourselves. So just know that you have my permission, you have your mom's permission, Anderson's permission to have these fantasies and to do you. Okay.

My mom and Anderson Yeah.

And myself.

And it's not religious based, right?

Yeah.

I mean, it's not like her moral compass is all because of religion because that's a little bit more stringent and rigid and harsh. Hard to, you know, if you. If you're having guilt to the point.

You think you're going to hell wherever it came from.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

And I totally think that's where, like, some of this.

I'm sure it's.

Even though my family was never religious, like, like super religious.

I could have heard something at a.

Young age, and I think that's where it comes from.

Yeah. We all have God. We all carry this stuff around.

So imagine gay guys, I think they're going to hell, and every single Sunday they have to be in the Catholic church looking at like a really ripped, sexy Jesus on a cross. That those thoughts that are going through their head, those guys are the guys that, you know, have the. Have the guilt. You're fine. You're good.

You should see some of the Jesus statues I've seen in space.

He's good looking, right?

Oh, my God, that's so funny. Okay, we're all good here.

Had a conversation and we agreed it was cool when I admired those statues.

Oh, oh, you had a conversation with Jesus. If Jesus is cool, we got Jesus.

You got your mom, you got Anderson and Jesus. We're all. We're all signed up, dude.

We're all good. Laura, this is. This is a good turning point for you in your life. Thank you, Laura. Awesome to talk to you. Good luck with you.

Good luck.

Bye.

Thank you.

Talk to you soon. I think that call was great with Laura. I think that so many people have shame and judgment and fears and worries around sex again that is holding him back. Whether it's our thoughts around that we're not good people or that we're fantasizing about Jesus. I just want to go easy on themselves. Okay, let's take another call. Okay, we've got Cameron. She's 26, from Atlanta, and she's got unwanted slippage during sex. Hi, Cameron, I'm here with Anderson.

Hi, Cameron.

Tell us what's going on with the slippage.

Okay, so it's happened with a couple of different partners, but pretty much what will happen is whenever I'm on top because my body tends to over lubricate itself. If I even raise too high, it'll slip right out.

Okay.

It's dangerous. It's very dangerous.

Yeah. It can be really painful for the other person.

You can break his. His penis.

No, no.

You absolutely Can't.

No. Right. You don't want to, but you're saying, okay, wait, so you slip out. So every time you're on top. What about when you're on the bottom?

It hadn't happened like that yet.

Okay, so. So are you curious? But do you have orgasms when you're on top? Do you just prefer being in. Are you just. Okay, so how can I help you? Do you want to know how to be on top and have not slipped or do you just. In all positions?

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, honestly, because it's like if. If I'm on bottom, then they have more control and they can, I guess, determine the depth in which they're going. But when I'm on top, then I'm in control. I have an issue, I guess, with I guess raising myself too high and it just pops out.

Right. Okay, that can happen. Because I think that what we see also in porn a lot is that women are bouncing up and down when they're on top. Right. And that typically is not what's going to work for a lot of women. You know, you. You probably want more of like a thrusting technique where you're. When you're on top and let's say you're in cowgirl and you like lay down with you. Have you tried to lay down with. Lean forward, like a 90 degree angle so you're leaning more towards him and you're kind of doing like more of an up and down motion. And then you're doing like a down, a back and forth.

Then it's just more like a. An intense grinding and then we end up sore.

Okay. You end up sore. What if you're lying? Okay, so what if it's a 90 degree angle though, and you're like leaning over him and you're moving, moving slowly like up and down while you're like. You know what I'm saying? While you're curved over him. While you're lean over him and you're sliding up, but it's slower. It's not like a fast and it's a slower motion. So it's not the grinding. It's still moving up and down, but you're leaning forward so he can't slip out. And you could even have your head on his chest, you know?

Yeah, I guess I could try that.

Yeah, that can definitely work. And then if you're doing reverse cowgirl, that's a good one. You can lie back towards his chest. So when you're in reverse cowgirl and you're facing. So you're facing Out. If you are laying back, you can easily move your body up and down. And it's not so much of the. And you're leaning back so he's. You don't understand. It's so hard to explain the position.

Don't take the cowgirl literally. I mean, you should not be, like, bucking bronco on top.

Exactly.

It should be more controlled and slow. And I think Emily's right with the. With the porns. They're always going haywire when you.

Doesn't even feel good. I don't. Yeah. I just do. I'm like, oh, this is the problem where they want me to bounce.

What's getting sloshed about.

Exactly. And that would hurt. Right. So. And it's not really about the shape of a guy's penis, because I think people are listening. Well, maybe he's really small or maybe he's big. It's typically not about that.

It's could be the way that it's pointed.

Does his penis curve?

No, it doesn't have any curve to it.

Okay. Slippage happens to everybody. It does happen. It happens all. I mean, I'd say it's a pretty frequent occurrence. It slips out and you put it back in. But I also think that in these positions, you could also stimulate your clitoris if you use toys. Do you use toys or anything like that? Your fingers, your hands?

Yeah, I have to use some sort of toy in order to reach orgasm.

Great. So I think that it's just a matter of leaning forward, leaning back when you're on top, and then using that toy and then just not doing the up and down and doing more of the thrusting, the. The grinding, but not as hard as a grind.

Does it feel better for you when you're. When you're going up and down, like, real fast and getting all the way, you know, out, in, out, in. Or. Or is it actually better once it's in there and then you just kind of, like, do the moving around? I know you say that it gets you. You chafe yourself sometimes, but are you doing it for him, or are you doing it for her? For yourself?

Yeah, Good question.

Well, I honestly. I do it more for me.

Okay.

I honestly don't focus on their needs as much.

Good. No, that's a great question. So you're saying you feel really.

I'm on top of doing it for me.

So when you're on top and you're going up and down, it actually feels good because that's where his penis is hitting, like, your G spot. It's not about the clitoris, is that what you're saying?

Yeah.

Okay.

I don't have one, but I would think that, like, once you're in there and it's kind of like touching the G spot, you can kind of like, writhe around a little bit. Right? Or do you got to get the hammer? You got to get the hammer.

I would also say do your Kegel exercise. Your Kegel exercises. I think this is so important. I'm telling you.

Do you ever do your Kegel exercises doing cowgirl? And she can stand up and hold.

Literally, I rip them out of bed with my hands.

Go to the kitchen while he's still connecting.

Yeah, yeah.

He has to walk in a crowd.

No, but I'm telling you, if you have more control, pelvic floor strength. And the great thing about doing your Kegels is that you could just do them every day for five minutes for, like, a few weeks, and you will absolutely feel a difference. And then you'll be able to clench those muscles. And that would. I. Seriously, that will help. That will reduce the slippage.

We're both a little slow today. No. But I have an iPhone app called Kegel Camp that can help you remind you do them. There's also some great. I love kaggle balls. Like, you can just wear them around when you're working out.

Balls.

Yeah, they're like Benoit balls. Who makes the Kegel balls that we did? FT London. FT London has great kegel balls. What are they called? The balls. Ft. Oh, they're so cool. They're these balls that you wear in your vagina.

Do they make little jingling sounds?

No, but it connects to an app and it measures your strength. The geisha balls. They're the geisha balls and they literally, you can see, over time, track it like a Fitbit, but it's like, for your vagina muscles. And you're like, oh, I can. It's stronger. So anyway, I think that would help too. And I also think.

Is it called a clip bit?

No. A clip bit. That's funny. No. Anyway, you can just do them on your own, though. You don't need anything fancy that will help. Cameron and I think that just experiment also with him, with him being on top to, like, if that's what you need. You can figure out a way to get that same kind of thrusting either when you're on top or maybe when he's on top of you. And missionary, you can put pillows underneath you that. That lifts up your pelvis as well.

Or just eight black guys. Let's Go on.

Hey, stop. Okay, Cameron, thank you very much for calling in Anderson. It's not about size. It's slippage, Cameron. So play with some of those positions and you're gonna, you're gonna figure it out. You're gonna get into your groove. Promise.

All right, awesome. Thank you so much.

You're welcome. Have a great day. Bye. Dude, sorry, it's not about. And I don't even know what you meant by that. Black men.

Oh, stop it. Stop being so sensitive. You know what? I do think that. Because I, I know that sometimes when I'm on your show, you get emails about dumb things that I've said. And I do want to. Maybe it's not too late.

I want to address all the dumb things you said. This would be a very.

I don't, I don't have. We don't have that kind of time. But just going back to, to the gay guys in church when they're confused about the sexuality and this and that, that is a real thing, though, and I'm sure that that happens. And I was, what I was saying is imagine those poor guys, what kind of guilt they're going through. I'm not saying that they should be guilty. I'm just saying I was, I was comparing.

Right. It was an extreme example.

I've thought that a lot. I've thought like, you know, because I know how I was when I was like, you know, 11, 12 years old, first figuring out sex and if I was attracted to men and I had to go to church. Like, I, I imagine, like, what if, like a large breasted woman was hanging up there half clothed? Like, it would. I would absolutely have run through my head.

I'm sure a lot of kids do and there aren't. They're like, you know, you see the naked imagery.

He's got like a six pack.

I know. And people are always. I know. And that's when it starts at a very young age. It's very confusing messages when you're a young kid and you're. And you're hearing that sex is bad, but you start having these thoughts and nobody explains it to your entire life. And then you're 22 years old calling in, talk to us, and we're helping you move through it.

So anyone who misconstrued that is me saying they should be guilty. I was not saying.

We're saying you're not. We're just saying it could be a lot worse. Yes, guilt. Although guilt is good.

And I was also saying, definitely date black guys. I did say that. Dude, no apologies.

I'm not even gonna entertain this. Okay, so our next call is Alyssa. She's 24, from Oregon. Oregon. I used to say Oregon when I was a kid. Oregon, Oregon. Alyssa. Hi. And she. Alyssa's emailing is about two submissives in the relationship. What to do about it. Hi, Alyssa. I'm here with Anderson. We are here to serve you.

How's Oregon?

Hi. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much for taking my call.

You're so welcome. We are here for you in Oregon. Excited to talk to you. We're in California, too.

Submissive. So what's up?

So, basically, my partner and I are trying to add some kinky stuff to our relationship. We have really great sex already, but we want to try some new things. And he really wants me to dominate him, but I've never done it before, and I just. I don't know what to do. It, like, kind of scares me. I feel like, you know, sometimes I sound really fake if I try to do it, and I don't even know what to say or, like, where to start.

I got it.

So I'm kind of looking for tips on, like, how to present myself in a more dominating way and, like, not just trying to nervous giggles and give up.

All right, that's a great question. I love this question. Because, first of all, you will be nervous and you will giggle, and it won't be. It might feel uncomfortable at first, and that's okay. Cause that's what happens whenever we try something new sexually. So I can't tell you how to do anything where you might not feel uncomfortable the first time you try it. So just know that's acceptable and it's worth it. Because this is how we get. This is how we make our sexual fantasies and dreams come true. Push through the hard stuff. So when he says to you or when you think about he wants to be dominated, do you know what that means to your boyfriend? Has he said, like, God, I picture you tying me up or spanking me or telling me to fold your laundry. Like, do you know?

I think definitely, like, handcuffs or rope would be really cool. I think he's interested in spanking. He's showed me some porn that he's watched.

Oh, good.

That's kind of like, you could do this, but I'm not even sure how to act like the women, you know.

Right. Okay. I. What? Anderson?

No, there. I think that something that would really help. This is. This is real advice. And this is immediately what came to my head was a piece of uniform, something you put on that helps you become the part. I know with acting, a lot of the time it takes, like, a certain, you know, jacket, or. I'm not saying put on a Hitler mustache or anything like that, however that could possibly work. But, like, you put on, like, a certain shoes, maybe stilettos or something, and you will become the part. It will. It will help you transform for sure, and not feel silly. It's like, almost like you're becoming a different person. You're acting.

That's. That's one thing. Like a role playing. Like, yeah. If there's something that makes you feel really sexy, like an army dressed up on Halloween, you know, do you like getting dressed up? Are you one of the women who like to kind of wear something sexy on Halloween, or is there something that makes you feel particularly sexy?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I actually really like lingerie, and I usually go towards more, like, feminine, lacy things. Okay.

But that's okay. It could still be the feminine, lacy thing and that. See? Okay, this is what I want. Anderson, I like what you're saying. I like your point. I'm gonna come back to that in a minute. So I want you to feel turned on and sexy and like you want. Right.

But what makes her turned on? That might be, like, getting taken advantage of or like, you know, being like. I'm not taking advantage of, but being overwhelmed and. And dominated herself. So if she gets herself in that headspace, there she is like a little dough, waiting to get the sex the way that she likes it, which is to be dominated. Because they're both submissives.

Right. But I'm saying.

Oh, God, can you imagine? Where do you want to eat? I don't know. Where do you want to eat forever?

Is that what happens in your relationship? No, but here's the thing. Getting yourself in the mood. I understand that you're. Because. No, but she can get in the mood. You can masturbate. You can think about sex. When you wear. I don't know, for me, when I'm wearing, like, something that makes me feel sexy. Lingerie or a great outfit, or I light the candles and I set the mood, it gets me in the mood. So you want to make sure that you're setting the stage for being in the mood. So even if it is lingerie, I wouldn't say you have to go out and buy, like, a dominatrix outfit. But what I would say is that let's start with the fact that he wants to be tied up. That's what we know. And that's actually a really easy Place to. To start with domination. Because what you can do is you can use, you know, and blindfold it. I like to say the blindfold and the handcuffs is like step number one. And we can make it pretty easy for you. And you still might laugh and giggle again, but that's okay. So you could use something you have at home, like a necktie. I always say, like, just buy the sport sheets. I'm obsessed with their stuff. Because it's beginner bondage. Well, they have stuff that's more advanced, but it's all Velcro. So it's like, literally, like handcuffs that Velcro together, they're the easiest things in the world to use. And then there's, like, Velcro, you know, blindfolds. And they have a beginner bondage kit, and you can get that. It's on my website. Yeah.

You know, I actually already have some of the sports sheets.

Perfect. Okay.

And I just, like. I feel like sometimes they get them out, and then I get stuck, and I don't know where to go next.

So this is the next step. Okay, perfect. This is exactly what we're gonna do. So what you're gonna do is the next time. Do you guys live together?

No.

Okay. So does he come to you? So the next time he comes over your house, this is what I want you to do. Do you guys have plans coming up this weekend? Does he come to your house or you go to his house? How does it work?

He goes to my house. Sometimes when we're trying to, like, set a mood, we'll get a hotel room.

Okay. Yeah, you could do. Actually, a hotel room would be great. Huge fan of spicing things up in a hotel room and mixing up your location. Wherever you are, I want you to get the handcuffs out and take a picture of them. Maybe there's. You're holding it. Do you ever send him, like, sexy photos of yourself?

Yeah.

Okay, so I want you to, because then you're gonna commit yourself to this. Take out the handcuffs and put, like, you could do a sexy picture with it. Have it hooked up on the bed. Or have one around your wrist and say, tonight. Like, when I see you next time, we're using this. Right. Or just send him a picture of it and say, thinking about seeing you next time. So they're already out or tonight. I can't wait for tonight. Right. And then when he gets to your house, you're gonna have them already out, ready to go. You're gonna have candles lit. You're gonna have music. You're going to be wearing your sexy lingerie, the thing that makes you feel like the badass sexy woman that you are, Alyssa. And then there's nothing you can do. But you say, come over here. Come to the bed. And you're going to put a blindfold on him, and you're going to wrap the handcuffs around him, and you're just going to start to kiss him, massage him. You're going to start to have some things by the bed, like some sensory play things I think you could have go to the kitchen and you could have a bowl of ice cubes, and you can also have, like, a warm massage candle. And you can play with different sensations. So you could, like, put some ice on him. You could, you know, you could spank him if you want. You could do whatever you want. You could rub your breasts over him. I mean, just. He won't know what's happening next because he's got the blindfold on. And whenever we take away one sense, all of our other senses become more heightened. So no matter what you do, it's going to feel amazing. And there you have taken control, and he can let go. And that's what we're really talking about, is that I don't know that he necessarily wants you to go in and start, like, you know, spanking, but right now, you just took control of the sexual situation and then see how it goes. How does that feel to you? How is that feel to you?

And a lot of it is not. Is doing nothing, too. A lot of it is gonna be withholding. So, yeah, you know, doing, like, not giving him what he wants. Yeah.

Teasing, like, not going right for his penis. So maybe you're massaging, is like using your fingers on his legs, but you're not touching his genitals. Is that what you're saying?

Give him a little. And then, you know, or edgy, edging. You know, you take him close and then you. You don't take them all the way until you're ready to take them all the way. And you might really like it. There's a chance that, you know, you're gonna explore and find a side of yourself you didn't know was even there. And you might really like it. So give it a shot. But I still think, like, even just putting on maybe like a button up, like, dress shirt or something, you know, unbuttoned, like a men's shirt with a collar, just some kind of something that would make you feel. Get into the mood, a little bit.

Of being the dominant.

Being the dominant.

Whatever it is, whatever it is, because I'm talking about just getting the handcuffs on and whatever gets you in the mood. It could be a dominant, it could be a shirt. It could be a lot of the.

Time, you know, a prop will help you, like, or a piece of costume will definitely help you transform.

Yeah, I like it. So set the atmosphere. And then once you got them tied up. Really? Yeah. You could be like, don't open your eyes or don't. You can't use your hands. You can't touch me. I'm in charge. Like, to say things like that. Like, I. You can't do anything. Don't talk.

Shut the fuck up.

Yeah, like, seriously, like, don't talk. Don't touch me. Don't try to escape. You know, like, just. I'm gonna. You don't know what's happening next. Like, like, I won't stop, you know, don't come. I'm not touching you. You know, just play with those things. But I don't want to give you too much to do because I don't want you to get caught up in a script, because I think it's all going to come naturally to you. But once you've got them there where you want them, you've already done the hard work.

First time out, you can even be completely silent. You know, that could work.

Yeah. Tease them.

Maybe only just say, shut up. Every time he says anything.

Shut up.

And then you just, you know, you're doing. You're doing all the work, but that could eliminate, you know, you're giggling. It sounds like as soon as you hear your own voice not being yourself, it gets you out of your head and you start laughing. So maybe you just do. Maybe the first round is you're a mute. You're quiet, have music playing.

Shut up.

Yeah, Hard metal.

You already have the handcuffs, so I feel like because you're talking about getting over that hump, you already bought them. But it's like, when does it happen? It happens when you tell them ahead of time that's happening that night. So you can't get out of it. You've already been thinking about it. You got him in the mood and you're ready to go. And don't be too hard on yourself and have fun. And I love that you're exploring and expanding and trying something new with him. It's awesome. Let me know how it goes, Alyssa.

Yes, I will. Thank you, Emily.

Thanks, Anderson.

Good luck.

So welcome. You got this, girl. Talk to you soon. Bye.

Careful of his balls, right?

Yeah. Unless he's into that Sort of thing. Yeah. Okay. That was awesome. That's good. I feel like it's so true that people want to make these little tiny changes, and then it's just like. It's like, oh, but where do I start?

Right?

You just got to do it. It's literally like ripping a band aid off the picture you've already committed.

They both want to do it. So that's how you get in trouble, is if one's really into it and the other one's like, can't we just missionary it like we do every night? Leave me alone.

That's right. That's the thing. They're both in the same place, and I like that they watch porn together. I kind of like cut her off with that. But for a lot of couples, that's a great tool. They'd be like, oh, can you try this? But she's saying, he did that. And she was like, I don't know how to do that. So it can be overwhelming. And that's why I say couples, you got to keep getting more granular with it. I'm showing you with my hands here that you could.

Baby steps.

Baby steps. But also, if he's like, I like this scene and you don't get it, you could be like, well, which part of it did you like? The part where she peed on him or. No, no, just the spanking purr. Who knows? You got to get more specific.

Right.

Got it. Love it. Okay. Anderson, great to see you.

Good to see you. M Always a. Good to see you. Good to see you. I miss you. I. I really do. I. I don't miss much about Loveline, but I do miss the calls and I miss you. And I know you delivered on both.

I'm delivering both. And I had lunch for you and.

You gave me lunch. That's right.

I know. Amazing that I had food.

I provided very much.

I'm so happy to see you too.

I'm still doing the film vault in the after disaster cinematics once a week, only once a month. We're downloading.

People love your podcast. They're great. Check them out. Anderson cowan.com.

That'S right.

Talk to them on the phone.

Dot com. This summer only is the only time that I'm. I think I'm going to make myself available to be able to answer any questions you might have or talk to.

Whatever you give advice. I'm afraid.

From Australia who has an idea for a movie. And we talked for over an hour, like, just workshopped it. It was really great. That's really Fun.

I love it. You guys get calls with Anderson, calls with the ants, with the ante.

I say Andy just because it's a little more.

I like Andy. It's a rakesh. It's like your alter ego.

Yeah, my wife calls me Andy.

Right? Yeah. I love it. Okay, well, thank you, Anderson. Thank you to everyone. Thanks to the callers. This is fun, you guys. If you do want to call into the show, you know the way that you send me an emails, you go to the website sexwithemily.com or you text to 797-979 Ask Emily one word, you'll get the form that you fill out and you can also check the box that says yes, I would like to be called. And then we will call you and we will have a chat and it feels so good.

And it's free.

It's free. Free, free advice, free therapy. Thanks everybody for listening and for following me on social, twitter, Instagram. It's all sex with Emily. I love you. Thanks to my amazing team. Thank you everyone for listening. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackswithemily.com.

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