7 Dec 2025 · 57 min
Emily Morse talks with Cyan Bannister and Nadia Lev from Ziviti about approaching oral sex with genuine enthusiasm and reciprocal pleasure. She encourages women to shift their mindset and treat it as an act of giving that benefits both partners.
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Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedrooms, they call them, in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend, cuz? My man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.
A girl's gotta have her standard.
Oh my.
Do women know about shrinkage?
Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean? Like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh, my God, I feel so good.
Being bad feels pretty good. But you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.
Hey, everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to all of our podcasts. Sign up for our mailing list, which you should, because we actually send out good emails. Not those annoying emails that people send me. They're actually informative and entertaining, so check them out. And you can also subscribe on iTunes. We do two shows a week, so you'll never, ever miss another show again, which I know would be devastating. And today's show, I'm here with Menace. What up, Menace?
Hi. How you doing today?
I'm great. It's so good to see you.
Thanks, you too.
I miss you.
You doing all right over there with that phallic microphone?
I love the phallic microphone. I actually feel at home with a phallic microphone in front of me. Is that weird? I'm really excited to see you. I miss you. Like, my heart misses you when I don't see you. I know I get, like, excited. I squeal when I see you.
It's crazy that we live in the same area once again and we still don't see each other ever.
I know, but that's.
You're always doing stuff and I got things going on. I'm going to Comic Con tomorrow after work.
I want to go.
I'm going to go for about a day and a half. I got to come back here and do another event at Six Flags and. Yeah, it's crazy. And then I'm going to Vegas like twice and all this crazy stuff.
That's awesome.
So I'm traveling, like, all the time.
Right. This is like your, your travel month of, of concerts.
Yeah. And work and stuff like that.
Yeah. That's okay.
How's everything going with you?
Everything's really good with me. Yeah, it's been fun.
Okay. So I have to tell everybody something near and dear to their heart on the podcast that I, you know, that I always, like, talk about Taco Bell. Just on the podcast. Just, you know, jokingly.
Not really jokingly.
Well, you know, I do have a true love anyways, but yesterday you can check out on my Instagram menace on Instagram that I got invited to the Taco Bell headquarters in Irvine, California.
This is like a dream come true. Like, somebody want to go like the White House? Niagara Falls?
Yeah, no, no, I just want to.
Go to Taco Bell. I get it.
And then they took me to the test kitchen and, you know, where they just test everything out. And it was, it was awesome.
Was it a highlight of your life?
It was. Everyone was really nice. Super cool.
Did you smell like tacos and stuff?
No, it was like, super clean. It's like going to like one of the nicest, like, dot com offices you've been to in San Francisco. Just like that.
Did they give you coupons or anything for free?
No, no, no. But it was, it was just, it was mind blowing because again, it was like walking into like a Google or a Twitter.
Right. No, I'm sure it looks very sophisticated.
Yeah. That way.
But like some background. Is that menace, for about the last eight years, has been talking about the taco that he wants to bring the double Decker.
It's the four alarm double decker taco. It's just something like, from when I was.
But he's been tweeting them for years. Yeah. And like years, like, bring the double decker for alarm back.
And then so they brought me in.
Did you have a sit down conversation with the CEO and say, that was a really good taco and I would like it?
Yeah, yeah, no, they were. They invited me back again. And then so they're getting all the ingredients so they can make it for me. It's crazy.
Oh, my God. Is what they call it the menace for alarm? Double duck.
No, no.
Why can't you swing that?
I know, right?
You should start a campaign.
Yeah.
So if you Want a taco named after Menace? You should tweet Taco Bell. What's their tweet? Twitter?
Taco Bell. Just Taco Bell.
That would make sense. They know. And I'm. I'm sex with emilyxwithemily on Twitter. And I want to say I'm very happy for you, Menace. I think I saw your Instagram. I liked it.
Yeah, you did.
I was really happy. Like, I actually. Second, I was like. Right. It was like last night.
It's funny because I've probably been talking about it for maybe five years on this podcast.
Yeah. A lot like. Yeah. And he's, like, trying to get healthy and remember that whole time, you want the health kick for like a week.
Yeah.
You're only going to, like. You're going to work out.
I was. But then I was like, no, I can't.
Besides that. We went back to tacos, and then he got to go, and I was really, like. I was really happy.
Well, the whole thing probably came up because of what we're probably going to talk about later. Not like this type of fetish, but it became like, fetishes. And then I asked you, like, oh, would you be into a guy that want to, like, incorporate it like Taco Bell into your.
It was a Hamburglar, actually.
Yeah. From McDonald's and stuff like that. That's how it all came to be. And then I told about my. My love for this studio.
Exactly. Right. Anyways, so I'm really happy for you. That's a big accomplishment. I feel like you're really going places.
Yeah. Thank you. What's going on in your life?
You know, there's been a lot going on in my life lately and doing a lot of writing. A lot of stuff we've been doing. I'm writing a new column for Glamour. Every Sunday night, there's a sex tip on glamour. It's glamour.com under the sex thing. And I've been writing. I did a really good one last, I have to say. Cause a lot of people liked it. So that's how you know in this world. I thought it was good, but people could not like it. But it was homework that you should do so you get to know your own body. And that's on Glamour. And you should check that. But also, I wrote this crazy piece for Men's Fitness, 10 Signs yous're Bad in Bed. And it literally, I'm looking at it now, got a million. Like, how many shares? Like 14,000 shares on Facebook, 2.1 likes and then thousand tweets. So you guys should check it out. Men's fitness. It's also on my website, Sucfamily. But it's interesting. It's for men. 10 signs you're bad in bed. You didn't know? Why is it so popular? Cause I think. I don't know who's sharing it, men or women. But it's really. There's some good signs here.
It's great. I gotta take.
Yeah, you should take. Well, if you're still bad in Bad Menace after all the years. I don't.
No, I just wanna see, like, you know, how you wrote it out and everything. And then also, you know, people might have tried to go to your Facebook page and.
Oh, okay. That's the big news.
Yeah.
Okay, so here's the deal. I talked about this a few weeks ago, and this is actually gonna relate to our wonderful guests here from Ziviti, and we're gonna get to them, these lovely women, in a moment. Is that I have this Facebook page which, as you all know, if you have a business or you, you know, you're breathing in this world, you know that Facebook is important to not only connect with your friends, but if you have a business, I use it to also connect with, you know, fans and listeners. And we post content five times a day. The page was like, you know, I've had it for five years maybe, but it's been taken off lately. We had like 5000 likes a day for a week. And it was going craz. And, you know, it's not sexually explicit. We're not putting naked photos up. But there was a. I found out what happened was I woke up one day three weeks ago, and it was a note from Facebook. I logged on. It said, your page has been unpublished. You can appeal it. And so I appealed it. I sent an appeal, like, please put it back up. I'm a doctor. I'm helping people.
And I'm sure you're very calm about it.
Oh, I lost my mind. No, it was a good email. It was a good email. And so I just tried. I mean, I literally. I called. I didn't know what to do. I called friends and friends who worked at Facebook, and it turns out that there was. The day they took it down, there was a email from some woman who lives in Iowa. I don't know what. Not even, like, a fan of the page, but said, I find this photo offensive. It was like, nothing. So they took it down. Then three weeks, it's down. So I'm upset because this is like, for example, I did my Big hustler workshop a few weeks ago, which was awesome. You know, you heard me talking about it. There's like 200 people there. And a lot of people who came said, what happened to your Facebook page? That's how I know about you. Cause people don't only listen to the podcast. Some people only follow me on Facebook or only follow me on Twitter. And so it was just. It was really upsetting. And so then the day we got it back up, like, five days ago, the second I put it up, there were four messages from people and they had the same thing. It was like, take that. We find this very offensive. There's, like, a campaign from, like, conservatives.
I get that hap. That happens to me all the time.
Where.
But they, like. Because of the morning show that I do, I had, like, you know, just random people. We were. We're making fun of this guy, like, basically shaming this guy who got caught having sex with the dog. And then, like, the dog community who didn't even hear what we were. What we did, right? People don't listen to the facts.
They didn't.
They didn't even listen to it at all. They just said that we promoted having sex with animals in, like, animal cruelty, which was not.
People just wanted, like. They're looking for, like, a people.
Like, that's the. The in thing these days. People are looking to be offended, right? You know, and they didn't even go back to listen to what we said in. You know, how we think no one does go and all this kind of stuff. But they just wanted to, like, shut us down in all levels and, like, started calling advertisers.
It happens all the time.
And, oh, yeah, we get calls to the radio station saying, you know, I. I don't know why I'm calling, but this is why I'm calling, right?
Because someone told them to call, and I don't even have the facts. And so I don't know what to do. I just. Now I've just been reporting these people as spammers on my.
Oh, nice.
Well, you know, I don't know what else to do. So. Okay, so here's the action item for you people, my lovely, amazing listeners that I love hearing from you all. And I read all emails that you send to feedbackaxily.com is that. Go like my page and check it out. Because anyway, it'll help get the momentum back up. Because what Facebook does is now they scale. They don't release it. You know, only like 2% of the people who actually like it can see Your post, I have to build it up again. I had a crazy momentum. So like that. And then another thing, Manus, which is great that you brought up on our last show, was that if people like the show, amazing. If you just go to itunes and write a review, that'd be great. And people did it. Manus, after you said that, I noticed. Yeah, and I so appreciate that. And because you know, we years back we started charged for the show and.
Then we got torn apart.
People were so mad and like trying to make a frickin living helping with your sex life. So I. Sorry. I charged for it for like five minutes. So we wanted people if you like it because we know we get thousands and hundreds of thousands of downloads that, that we just, you know, it's nice.
So thank you.
So thank you everyone for doing that.
Writing it out with us.
And then also what else? Yeah, and follow me. Instagram and Facebook and Twitter, which is all sex with Emily. Cause it's all good stuff. And then I wanted to say to you, Menace, I don't know anything else.
That you love me.
I love you and I miss you.
You're happy that I'm here? Yeah, totally.
Okay, well, let's talk to our guests here for a minute. Hello.
No.
Okay, so this is Cyan Bannister and Nadia Lev from Ziviti. It's Ziviti.com.
Correct.
And Ziviti. Tell us about your site. Exactly. Because you guys, Sion was on the show before I cut you off, before you can answer. A few years ago. And we talked about her site. It's. And it's a really beautiful site. Amazing photography. And you can go back and listen to that show. But tell me right now what's going on because I haven't talked to you in a few years. So.
Sure. A lot, a lot has been going on. We've been around. What have we determined? Like seven, eight years now.
Okay, great.
When we started it. And then I was first on your show. I remember I was just starting out and I was like, I can't screw this up. And I was on your show and I was like, what do I say? And I was so professional and I couldn't like come out and say like, I have a site with beautiful tasted naked ladies.
So you couldn't say that. You didn't say that?
No, I didn't say that. I remember it was like, I want to go back and listen to it. I know, just like, can't screw this up. Can't screw this up.
Oh God, no. Right?
You didn't so much has happened. You know, we've learned a lot about the business. And actually, I'm here with our general manager, who's my business partner. I love her to actually tell the story about Zibody because about. What was it, like eight months ago or a year ago or so? I actually turned the company over to her, and she's been running it, and she's been doing a really great job. So her. Take it from here.
Okay.
Okay. So first I'm gonna tell a little anecdote about my history as a photographer and how that relates to Ziviti. So. Two seconds. I'm not trying to make this about me. I actually.
Oh, whatever.
Don't worry. I do it all the time.
When I was younger, I had a career as a freelancer to. And in my spare time, I loved shooting women in latex clothes with crazy hair and makeup and long nails and glamorous makeup. And those shoots were all for fun. Everybody was working for free. The makeup artist, the wardrobe stylist, and we just had a blast. And the pictures were raw and powerful and sexual. And the things that I actually got paid to do were like headshots for a teenage modeling agency or portrait of a jazz band. And it just hurt my heart that the artwork that we were pouring our souls into didn't have a market because it was too weird for fashion magazines. It wasn't. I don't know. So I kind of got away from photography because there was no way to make a living doing what I loved.
I totally understand that.
But Cyan has been thinking about how to solve this problem, how to give people the opportunity to make even at least a side income. Making images that express their sexuality on their terms. Not what Playboy wants you to be. Not what Suicide Girls wants you to be. Those are all lovely platforms or publishers, but everybody wants you to look a certain way. You have to have tattoos, you have to have beautiful blond hair. But people. There's real bodies, real people, real fetishes. And we wanted to create a platform where anybody could express that in a safe environment and be supported by their fans. Find a community that.
So it's for artists. It's for artists, photographers, and models. They come to site, you can vote and all that stuff because I'm a member of the site, and so. And so people can. So now there's a place for it. And you have to join.
You have to join. You pay a subscription to join, and then you see thousands of sets from all over the world made by models and photographers. And if you see one that you like, you can vote on it. So what voting does is you express your reverence and appreciation for that person's work and you get to support them. Every vote costs a dollar, and that money goes directly to the artists.
Oh, that's nice. So if I vote the photographer or the model or both, they split it.
So you vote 10 times. It's like you're giving $10 over to the artists. And Zibody gets a cut to cover, like, credit card fees and stuff. But it's mostly all about the artists.
That's great. That's great. I mean, it's beautiful, beautiful artwork and it's hot and sexy. And so what are some of the popular, like, are there any, like, common fetishes or common things in your site that are the most popular sets that people look at or look for? Is it really across the board?
I think it's across the board and it's so diverse. But recently, Nerve did a piece on one of our top models. She's our fourth top model. Her name is English Babs, and she's 55 years old, has five children, and she's incredibly popular on the site. And one of the reasons why is that people love her grace and maturity and how proud and comfortable she is in her body and her skin. And she's such an inspiration to everybody on the site that, you know, I look up to her because I'm like, wow, if a woman can do that and like, rock that body and be proud of herself.
Exactly.
I can grow into, into an older woman and be proud of myself and love myself too. And so she's like, such an inspiration.
Exactly.
We were so pleased that, like nerds.
And it helps women with self esteem. I mean, the thing is, because so many women, you're right, they look at these sites and they think they should look a certain way. And your site has all different body types and all different representations of women. And I think it also can inspire women to feel confident.
I think we have a little bit of something for everyone. I think if you come to Ziviti, you're going to find photograph that you like, no matter what you're into.
Right. So there's a lot of, like, strong fantasy themes on your site. So are there any fantasies in that there that like, portray anything from your own lives?
Oh, gosh, yeah, totally. Like what I really like. Well, I would like to get more into cosplay. And so we have a lot of people, you know, comic cons right around the corner.
Right, right. Menacing.
This is Very appropriate. But I fantasize about being in cosplay. And so I get very inspired when I see some of the models on our site who are, like, showing up as Wonder Woman or, like, various different, even obscure characters that I don't even know. So I have to go search for them and try to figure out what it is that they're portraying. And so I think the fact that the women are able to think about whatever it is in their fantasy world that they want to be and become that, whether it be Game of Thrones, whether it be, you know, some character.
Is there anyone that gets a Hamburglar by chance?
No. We could host a hamburger prize and we could actually get sets with hamburger.
We should talk about prizes.
Well, that's. That's my. The back.
He wants me to dress up.
See, this is what I asked her, because she's not really a fast food type. I said. I said, if your dream guy, who was, like, perfect in every single way, the guy that you finally want to marry, because she does never wants to get married, said.
I love you. There's just this one thing that I want. I want you to dress up as the Hamburglar while we have sex. I asked her, would you do it? And she said, no.
No. The first time I was like, I'm saying the.
I'm like the perfect guy in every single way. She's like, no. Why? Because it doesn't make me feel sexy. See, it's always about her.
No. Anyway, that's our hamburger thing. No, that's not true. But I love dressing up. But if I dress up, I would hope that it would be a mutually exclusive, enjoyable experience for both of us. Not that I wouldn't do stuff for a guy if he's like, oh, I want you to. Whatever. Put out that frigging hamburger. That's the least sexy thing I heard. I'd be like, just give me a French fries and a Big Mac and.
We'Re going to eat. Yeah.
In regards to the hamburger on Ziviti, we have another feature called Prizes, which is a creative prompt for the community. So you say, let's say Menace wants the hottest Taco Bell themed set ever. He can go on the site and put up $200 or whatever prize he feels is reasonable and say, I love Taco Bell. I want tacos on your boobs. I want, like, I want you to.
Go a bed of tacos.
Yeah, totally. And whoever comes up with the best set on this theme gets this prize money. And then people submit their creative take on the Taco Bell.
Wow, that's really cool.
Yeah, Glamorous. You could do that. So are there any common themes on the site that you think just keep coming. Your top three fantasies or fetishes that come up.
Good question.
Yeah. Gosh, I'm always surprised at what I see because we don't create the content. It's all user submitted and so every time I log in.
Yeah, but there's themes too.
And there's, you know, I think the only consistent theme is beautiful photography of wonderful women and what they want to do with themselves and how they want to express themselves. And it's so varied.
People seem. The perennial themes that I see are tattoos. People love like, show me your ink.
Right.
And people love nature. People love girls running through the fields or by the stream, which I think is quite charming.
That is pretty. Yeah, that's nice.
And then there's also nature women in the snow.
Yeah, Cold.
And then there's also like more political prizes. Like.
I'm upset about NSA wiretapping. I'm upset about the Snowden revelations and the fact that we get spied on. Create a set that captures that feeling of being intruded upon or spied upon in surveillance.
And so there's like women standing there, like what? Like about representing that theme. Like they're being spied on or they're.
Yeah, like there's like creeper surveillance camera photos where like, God, there's everything. It's interesting.
Yeah, that's really cool. So then. And then the community, it's a community that you've built and then they're all. They all know each other. I mean, online, and they're chatting.
People have made like best friends on our site. There's people been married. You know, any community has this. And so that's one of the things that's really special is you find out about these long lasting friendships that get built.
That's really cool. I like that. So let's talk about the Free the Nipple campaign. Okay. So let's give some background if people don't know.
Yeah, sure. So I met this wonderful woman named Lena Esco who made a film called Free the Nipple and she gave me basically the rough cut of it to watch. And she put up a. It's not Kickstarter. They use some other platform, some crowd raising, crowdfunding platform for it. And they raised not enough money. I was actually really surprised that she didn't raise a ton of money and that people weren't really super motivated to back this project because the project was about, you know, being able to expose our breasts in public in places like New York or places where they're arresting women for being nude. And it's a fictional film, but it covers a very real issue about female breasts and sort of society's relationship with the female nipple and how it's unfair that men can be topless pretty much everywhere.
Right.
And, like, you could take your shirt off right now, minutes, and just, oh.
You don't want me to do that.
She never has. I'm surprised. Yeah, you could.
And.
But if I walk outside, I guarantee you I will be stopped. I will be harassed. You know, people will treat me very differently. And so the movie, you know, it's. Activism is a form of art, and they made it. And so what happened was it slowly started to take off where we hosted a prize for free, the nipple. We had a lot of our artists doing it, and then we started seeing more and more people on Instagram popping up. And then all of a sudden, celebrities started attaching to it, which is really fantastic. So, like, Miley Cyrus was one person. She posted an Instagram photo of herself holding a nipple. And, you know, she's like, there's no reason why this should be shameful. And then, you know, Rumor Willis started walking around, like, topless in New York City. And before we knew it, like, Facebook actually started to unban photos of women breastfeeding with babies. So while that's not perfect.
Right.
It's like a step in the right direction where we need to be. And I don't understand what the big fear is overseeing, like, a female nipple.
I know. Especially if you go to Europe, there's, like, nipples everywhere. You're like, where's your nipple? Why aren't you showing your nipple?
Your eyes explode. Like, what's going to happen? I don't really understand now.
Now I'm on your side 100%. Like, I do believe that it's a double standard and you should be able to do whatever. Whatever you want. But when it comes to. When it comes to online and Facebook, like, we. We don't own Facebook, so they can make whatever rules that they want, you know? So, like, the same thing happened with Rihanna. So Rihanna was posting topless photos on Instagram, Right?
Those photos were hot.
Yeah. And they were taken down. And they cancel her account.
They just took them down, right? Instagram just took them down, or they.
Told her took them down. I think they, like, close her account for a second. I don't know all the details.
I'm just curious.
But.
You know, they just. They just don't allow it. And that's, that's up to them. That's like, you know, if you, if you don't agree with their rules, then just don't use their platform, you know. And then so she went to Twitter which does allow it and just Frontier.
Yeah, I know but like for now.
Like said, oh there and you know, Tumblr and stuff like that.
But it just use a different platform that agrees with your, with your, your thoughts.
Well, why they have the right to do it. It doesn't make it. I still think it's wrong. As a private entity, obviously you can do whatever you like. And I don't believe that there should be a law that forces Facebook or any of these companies to allow nudity. But I think from a, just sort of thinking about society and their impact on society and what this is causing, it's causing people, women to be treated as second class citizens when it comes to nudity in our bodies and our agency over ourselves. And it actually permeates all the way through to how we treat prostitution, the media and the MPAA and how they give ratings to films. And it all starts with just whether or not we can handle the image of a breast. And I would much rather see, I'm not saying that even pictures of violence should be banned. We should still see violence. I actually think we should see that too. But I think we see so many. Like I go through Facebook and my feed and I'm seeing like dismembered kids in Gaza.
Right.
And it's killing me. And yet you can't see a beautiful picture of a loving couple, you know, in an embrace to remind you that there's still some love.
Exactly. It's such a double standard. So puritanical. But yeah, we spent more money in this country on porn and everything else. Like we're so repressed, but yet it's everywhere. But we still are the only country left that's like cracking down. All this stuff when you go to like France or Europe anywhere. Like you see nipples and all the, in all the advertisements, photography, it's, it's just, it's messed up.
Yeah, no, and I again, I totally agree with you. It's just that's how I feel on the whole, the online, because I know it's a battle between on Facebook and Instagram to be able to share these photos.
Well, I've heard this argument before. If you don't like the social network, go to this other social network. But I think when a site reaches the enormous network effect that Facebook has, you Pay you pay a toll. There's a cost. My friend Lori Penny, who's an excellent journalist, wrote about this. When Facebook did their happiness experiment, where they turned on more sad content for some people and happy content for others, and basically used a bunch of people as guinea pigs to determine whether or not the information you get changes your mood. And people were upset. So everyone was like, you don't like it? Don't use Facebook. And Lori wrote, the cost to that is like you miss out your cousin's cry for help at three in the morning, or your relatives who are too old to use any other platform, like.
You get attached to it and like changing the formula.
Not only that, but there's no alternative, and we're silencing people. And, you know, while I can't force Facebook to do this, the only thing that you can do about speech is more speech. And I think people need to stand up and they're going to have to eventually listen to their consumers, you know, because if they actually do fear that we're all going to leave, I mean, I guess we could have a mass exodus and that would make them fearful. But, you know, if there's only a few million people who do it, it's a drop in the bucket for them.
Hey, look, it happened in MySpace. It can happen to. Maybe they can have.
MySpace was replaced by Facebook, right? Pretty much, yeah.
And then Facebook can be replaced.
Let's replace it.
Like Zivity. If you. I mean, if you actually. I mean, you. You guys probably have fan pages and stuff like that.
Which I've.
Which I've had threatened to be, I'm sure.
Yeah. Many times. But you probably know, like, how many people you're actually reaching on your page these days. You know, it's not really that much, so.
What do you mean? Oh, because they. They hold back.
They hold back. Like you only.
Well, last they talked about, you only reached 10% of your audience.
Yeah. They don't even show everyone.
And then they. I think they're about to throttle down to about 3%.
Because they want you to pay and buy ads.
Yeah.
And then the ads aren't that effective either. We run them and they don't work.
So you just find. You just find other ways. And I have to find other ways to, you know, get referral traffic to my website, and it's just gonna, you know, it's gonna happen.
Well, we hear Instagram still effective. We heard that from another artist who told us that, you know, her sales are up and her business is booming because of Instagram, so I still feel like even though Instagram is cracking down on, like, you know, racy images as well, because they're now owned by Facebook, but you can still run a business on it and get referral traffic on it and without ad promotion, at least right now.
So you hear what I'm saying? I'm on your side.
We are all on your side. And your site really is beautiful. Everyone should check it out. I mean, the site, the photography. And we're also going to potentially do some kind of joint. Like my. I do blogs every day. We talked about this. But using some of your imagery, because it's really beautiful on our site as well, because we write a lot about sex, relationships. It might be nice. I love people.
Might be into your photos on her website.
Yeah, totally. And then promote the whole thing together. Yeah. Because we. You guys are in your soul. In San Francisco, that's where I met.
I. I was just looking today. I saw somebody saying that it's like a. Like a national holiday for, I think, like bds.
Bdsm. I should know this. Don't tell me. Yeah, it's today's BDSM day, and I don't know. Yeah, how is this possible?
My friend just posted a lovely photo of her.
Do you guys have a lot of that on your site? On your site as well?
It's my habit.
Yeah, it's hot. It's international. Come on, guys.
I'm just saying, on her side, it's like role playing, bondage. It's like. Yeah, I mean, right, I get it.
I mean, one time I. I came out to my parents on National Coming Out Day, and I had no idea it was a national holiday.
Oh, no way.
But I was like, hey, sweet.
You came out to them as.
As bisexual.
Bisexual. Oh, really? On that day? You didn't even know it.
I didn't know. But there's all these new holidays.
Like, I know it's like Anal Sex month in August. Did you know? Coming up in 10 days. Who knew Anal Sex month would be a big month for Menace.
Coming out to your parents as bisexual. Because I always talk to my friends that come out as Just tell me. As just gay but bisexual. They might say, oh, you know.
So it's pretty funny. When I was a teen, the first time I asked my dad, dad, what's a lesbian? He was like, honey, it's a very sick person. The type of person I hope you will never meet. And then a few years later, I was like, mom, would you love me if I was gay? At that point, I'd figured out that I was bi. And she was like, of course I'd love you, honey. You're like, you can't help it. And I was like, what about if I was bi?
And she was like, no, lesbians, fun, bisexuals, confusing.
And she was like, yeah, because you have the choice to live a normal life and you'd be throwing that away but you know, but years later they just became so much more accepting that it was like, oh, cool. We're so glad you have a girlfriend, sweetie. We're so happy for you.
That's good. They're just happy that you have someone. Well, exactly. So you have a girlfriend and you see men as well. So you're in like a polyamorous. Yeah, that. Whatever you want to call it, everyone calls something differently. Open relationship.
Yeah.
And how's that? For a long time. So your whole life you've been that way?
No, it happened when I moved to San Francisco.
Always when it happens.
You catch.
When you move there, everyone thinks I'm weird here. I'm like, not that I'm in. I don't know what I'm in. I'm in a bunch of different kind of things. But yeah, San Francisco's the place to do it. Right.
Everyone's like, cool, it's cool there in Santa Cruz, California.
Yeah.
That's why I think SF was a perfect city for Cyan to launch Ziviti in. Because it was just so open minded. It is very progressive.
It was a great, it was a great city. Even here L. A is a little, you know, different. It's open minded but it's more like can we get, can we make money on this? Can we sell it?
The most open, closed minded city in America.
Why close? I was just there the other day.
The only thing is like yes, they're very open minded to. I would say like other thing that people would find extreme, you know. But the only problem that, that sucks about San Francisco is like if people don't see your way then they're gonna.
It's like very divisive. People have a dude. I know, yeah.
That's what kind of sucks. It's like, well f you then if you don't, you know, you're not into shitting in bags on the street or something like that. I don't know.
I got it. I was, I had been back because I lived there for 20 years and I had to go back for a meeting just on Monday and honestly I got there as gloomy as rain and I love, I mean San Francisco is like I feel like I'm still like, always be a San Franciscan, but I had to move here for work. But I kind of felt like the city had changed. And I felt like I ran into. It was like run into an ex boyfriend who got kind of fat and not as cute anymore. And I had this relief that we broke up. That's how I felt about San Francisco. But I love it in my heart. I know it sounds bad, but you know when you're into an ex, you're like, oh, good, he's not that cute anymore. I don't want to sleep with him. I was like, oh, I don't really want to sleep with him anymore. So I felt okay with it. But I then, but then. So that's how I felt about it. Like it had changed a lot. And it was like, it was crowded and rainy and I forget how cold it is and how nice it is here. But that's like the superficial part. I miss my friends and my life there. But I felt like this was just a good change. Just. I just think change is always good. And I was there for like most my life, so.
And then also the big dot coms have like really come in again in the past.
Right. Everyone's leaving the city. It's changed since I left. Right.
You know, it took me an hour to find parking space like by my house.
Oh, I know, I know. I.
So shady.
I really, just before I moved there, I was. I had two parking spaces. One by one of my office offices and one by my house together with $700 a month just for parking. That's how insane it is to live in San Francisco. It's not worth it right now. Like if you make 180,000 a year or something like that, you're like mid level.
Yeah.
In San Francisco. It's crazy.
It is crazy.
But I don't know that you're like considered poor.
I know it's crazy, but do you feel rich here?
Oh, my God. Like, for what I get.
I know you live in a place.
Here is five pools big. I have two parking spaces that I don't have to pay extra money for and guest parking. It's crazy.
I know it's crazy. And it's like 80, 96 degrees more relaxing.
But I do miss, you know, being around the city and stuff.
No, I miss all my people. And then I left and I cried on the airplane because I saw my friend and I missed her. So like I went in going, oh, I'm so glad.
Did you guys make out? You should have.
No, she's not like that. Okay. No, but I would have told you about it. Okay, so everyone can find you guys Ziviti, Z I V I T Y dot com.
That's right.
And they can check it out. You can. And you can see some of the photos for free, some of the photo sets and stuff. So what are you hoping? Like, what's your goals for the site, like, in the coming years? Like, what do you hope people go there and check it out just to. What is it? What would you like them to do?
Well, quickly, in regards to seeing pictures on Ziviti for free. If you go to ziviti.com gallery. Yeah, yeah, ziviti.com gallery, we have 100 free images. We don't publicize this. So this is like a special thing for Sex with Emily viewers.
Oh, awesome.
But in the coming year, I mean, we're looking at what a lot of companies like Kickstarter and Patreon are doing. Ways that people are continuing to support their favorite artists online. And we want to build more tools like that into our site. More ways for people to support their favorite artists. I can't talk about it because some of it is under wraps.
Okay.
We're moving forward.
Like, okay.
We just brought on a new developer. Super exciting.
That's great. That's very exciting. Okay, well, I think it's great. And everyone, check it out. I think it helps people too, with, like, body image and body positivity. So is it more men and women that come to your site or it's all. Would you say it's everyone?
Well, we're probably predominantly male, but given, you know, the subject matter, you know, men love pictures of women, but women.
Love pictures of men. Right?
Now, things that I often hear, like, women will stop me and say, I really love your site because I found a woman who looks like me. And the way she did her makeup and the way she wore that lingerie, like, I wouldn't have thought of that. And so now I'm inspired to go down to X, Y or Z store and buy these things.
No, I was looking at your site and I got this new. I went. I got. Went to Agent Provocateur and got some beautiful things. And I was thinking of doing some photography. Well, it's a long story, but I was taking pictures. I was wearing it and a friend of mine was taking pictures and I was like, I don't know how to pose. Like, I didn't know how to pose in it and how to. You know, it was all. I had this whole thing And I'm like getting some ideas about photos.
We're actually starting to develop artist guides for our models and photographers. Like how to pose, how to shoot indoors.
Yeah, everyone needs those tips. I'm like, oh, gotta touch this up.
You should totally go to Comic Con and dress up as like a Super Mario Brother or something like that.
Yeah, I want to go. I do. It's in San Diego.
Hamburglar.
Yeah, it's in San Diego.
It's tomorrow.
Yes, it's tomorrow.
I can't. I'd like to.
You're gonna miss out.
I know. Okay, well, we're gonna get. If you guys are welcome to say we got it. We're gonna move into a little bit of, of of emails and stuff. But yeah, so feel free to chime.
In if you have.
Feel free to chime in. Seriously.
Okay.
Okay. But first I have a word from our sponsors. All right? Okay. So as you know, I friggin love doing the show for all of you for free. And thanks for supporting our sponsors. So Fleshlight is the number one sex toy for men. So wouldn't it be amazing if you could actually feel the pleasure of having sex anytime, even if you didn't have a partner? The Fleshlight is the most popular sex toy for men. It actually simulates the sensations of having sex. And it was engineered to look and feel like the real deal. And some people say it's better than sex. I mean, I don't know what kind of sex they're having, but it actually feels that way. That you're a loveless relationship. Or if you just want to improve your stamina, they have the Fleshlight stamina training unit. Helps you last longer in bed, become a better lover, and you also experience some of the most mind blowing orgasms of your life. So I've heard. And also if you ever fantasize about having sex with your favorite star, they've got her vagina that's been molded and you can have sex with it too. Katie Cross, Tera Patrick, all that stuff. So check it out. You've heard me talk about flashlight and I'm telling you, I don't think that you're gonna get a Fleshlight and hate it. I've just never heard a negative thing from anyone who has gotten it. So you might as well spice it up. Women. God knows we've got a gazillion sex toys out there. This is the one for you. Sexwithemily.com Fleshlight that's sexwithemily.com FleshLight Speaking of toys, another reason you're able to listen to us for free is because the incredible people@goodvibes.com you guys know Good Vibes San Francisco. Woo. Do you love them? Did you guys get your first vibe right there?
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Sweet.
Sweet.
I can't believe I didn't even mention this when we're talking about dressing up. So I had actually a weird day today already.
Okay, what happened?
So, you know, I was doing research. I do a morning show with a group of people. It's called the Woody show on Alt 98.7 here in Los Angeles every morning. And so I research a lot of news, and I saw a news article about somebody doing a parody porn of Weird Al Yankovic.
Right.
Okay.
And then so they, they dressed up as Weird Al. He used to have a TV show called uhf and they made the porn around UHF here. Like, here's what the photo looks like. Should put a link.
God, we should put a link.
You'll put a link up on there.
Oh, my God.
It's hilarious, right?
Yeah.
So I'm reading that and then I'm seeing that, you know, I'm sitting at work and I'm just typing and working on stuff. Guess who turns around the corner?
Weird Al.
Weird Al.
Shut up. What'd you do? Did you go?
Well, I, I sorry I didn't mention the forum because today he actually had the number one album in America from his, like, latest album. So, yeah, I said hi and I congratulate him. I took a picture. It's on my Instagram. Oh, awesome menace on Instagram if you want to see it. But it was, it was so Funny. Just like, oh, I'm reading about, like, how there's this.
Did you tell him that you were. Well, you didn't tell me you're reading the porn thing, but did you say, oh, I was just.
I was just like, oh, no. Because I just heard that he went number one and then so I just was. Congratulations, that's cool.
Must admit, I can't believe he's still.
Relevant because I mentioned Weird Al to Emily and she's like, oh, is that the guy from, like the 80s?
I met him.
Yes. He has still stayed relevant. Emily does not.
I have not stayed relevant.
She doesn't watch television or keep up on pop culture at all.
So nothing.
It's not hard to believe that she didn't know that Weird Al is still around.
But I'm surprised.
If you want to see Weird Al porn, you should link it on Sex with Emily dot com. I'm telling you, people would love that.
We'll do that, Lauren, on your Facebook page. We're going to give it porn. We're all over that stuff.
It's like the AV club.com did an article on it. It's hilarious.
Okay, thanks, Menace. Thanks for bringing me all the important news. Of course.
I appreciate it, Weird Alpine.
Trying to think who I met. I feel like I can't remember. Okay, so anyway, email subjects we have. Let's get into them. So, as you know, I love hearing from you. Feedbacktextwithemily.com I do read and try to answer all your emails and I keep them coming. Dear Emily, I've been listening for six months now and love your podcast. I just listened to Communication is Lubrication and Intern Sex Toy Review. And I want to let you know that I especially love the shows where your interns participate. It seems so easy to identify with them. I can identify with the perspectives and experiences and still learn a lot. I find these shows extra special. Wanted to encourage you to doing this more often. The discussion between three of you feels like a coffee shop chat among girlfriends. It's a great addition to your show. I love Episodes. You have experts and of course Menace as well. But these regular girls are easy to identify. It just adds on your show. Congratulations to them as well as having the courage at that age to step up to the microphone with you and open up. Great job to you all. Keep it going. It doesn't say your name. Thank you.
I'm sure they're so good because, like, your interns are probably all they do is hook up on Tinder all day, don't they?
I Don't know what they. No, she's got a boyfriend. But we've been doing some great shows with them because, as you know, we've always done intern sex to review and you can't always be here. And so we just sat. We've done a few shows. We just did another one which hasn't been released yet. And we did one a few weeks ago. And people really have liked these shows a lot because we're sitting around talking about, like, so how was your first orgasm with this vibrator that. Cause Good Vibes is our sponsor and they get to pick out whatever they want on our site. It's fun being a sex love intern. They always go home with goodie bags every day. And yeah, she came and talked about it. You know, it's interesting. Cause there's an age, you know, in their early 20s, talking about oral sex. I always feel like guys. Did you guys feel like men knew how to perform oral sex in their early 20s or even later, that men.
Knew how to perform?
Men?
No.
Right. One of my interns had to go to the hospital because some guy hurt her so bad with his tongue. And I just feel like, Jesus, these are the guys that have to listen to the goddamn show. But it's just interesting hearing and her experiences about bringing toys into the bedroom and all that stuff. So for the first time, because I give them to, I don't make them do it. I don't say, hey, you gotta bring this. But so anyway, thank you for your email, sweetie. Okay. Kaggle Camp. Hey, Emily. I love your show and I love the Kegel Camp app. I use it every day on my way home from work. I need your advice concerning the clitoris. My boyfriend is very good at finding my clitoris with his tongue and hands, but whenever he's touching it, the pressure is too much and it hurts. I've told him to be gentle, slow down, etc. But it seems like no matter what we try, it's always too rough for me to have an orgasm. I'm able to get myself off while masturbating, but I can't get off with his hands or mouth. The sex is great. We are able to communicate with each other. He's given me plenty of G spot orgasms, but I still haven't been able to get me off this way. Any tips so I can give my man? Get my man from touching my clitoris so that it doesn't hurt. You're the best. Much love from Austin, Texas, Caitlin. Okay, Caitlin. She loves my. Okay, so I have an app called kegel camp. It's for men and for women. You can get it on the itunes store. Just cover that first. Do you guys know kegel exercises?
I talked about it on the radio for you and told people to download it.
You did?
Yeah. Just the other. We started talking about kegels, and I was like, oh, yeah, my friend has an app. Download it.
It's true. And I gotta tell you, there's a big thing in the New York Times. I see people think it's for women, but for men too. There was a big thing about men's, like, prostate health and all that, that everyone should be doing their kegels. No one remembers. Doctor tells you do it, and it reminds you every day. Okay. Anyway, Clitoris. So she finds it with his tongue, hands. The pressure's too much. You've gotta tell him. But it seems like no matter what we try, I think you gotta try some mutual masturbation. Caitlin. I think that you should have him watch you, and you should watch him. And maybe he just. Cause it sounds like you're the one having issues. And you can show him exactly what it is that you do, and then he can mimic those movements. Because maybe just by telling him to slow down and move his hands, it's like maybe he's getting nervous to get directions. Sometimes getting directions in the moment for men can be really intimidating. And they just feel like they're messing up. So I would just say, like, hey, babe, watch me do it. And first of all, what a lot of women don't realize, which I've learned lately, always, is that they don't. They don't think that it's hot for their partner to watch them, whether you're with a woman or a man to masturbate. And it's really a. Can be the most erotic, sexual, hot thing. Women are like, oh, my orgasm. Just do it. It's a really sexy thing. It's intimacy. It's bringing you guys closer together. But also, a lot of women are really, really sensitive. Their clitoris is just sensitive. And women just don't necessarily like to be touched there as much. But it sounds like that's what you do want. And you're already having g spot orgasms. So I would just then focus on your cholesterol. Because if you can do it, he can do it, he can learn it. I'm sure he's a smart guy. And so I'm trying to think what else. You said you told him to be gentle, slow down, but you need to show him. It looks like you just need to show him. If the actual verbal cues are not. Any suggestions, they're probably obvious. What?
No, the verbal cues.
Yeah. It's kind of hard to I just, like, take his hand and show him or have him watch you.
Yeah, I mean, I used to work as a teacher, and one of the first things we learned is that different people are different types of learners. Visual learners, kinetic learners. Maybe he's a kinetic learner and needs to do it. Exactly.
That's how I am. I'm a kinetic learner, too. I am. I need to feel things, do it in the moment, touch it, experience it.
So I've given this advice to someone before who had this issue as well. And I know this may sound strange, but I told them to put their hand on a piece of fruit that has very thin skin on it, like a peach, and rub it and, you know, be gentle enough that you don't tear the skin off the peach.
A bright peach.
You're not supposed to do that.
No, peach is. That's a great example.
And for whatever reason, that, like, mental image and the thought of that, they don't even have to go touch the peach. It's just thinking about, like, pressure and, like, the fact that rubbing could actually cause that friction and create that problem seemed to fix it for the person I was.
That's great. That's really good advice. Menace, how have you dealt with painful clitoris?
Oh, painful clitoris doesn't talk about it. I usually run the other way.
He doesn't even know what this is. I don't know why I'm talking to you about this in this moment, but that's cool. Okay, so let me go to the next email here. All right, so clitoris, it's a big thing. Okay. Come dig. This is called cum digest. God knows we're going here. Hi, Emily. I haven't been sexually active for long. I've engaged in foreplay with previous boyfriends, but didn't want to fully have sex until I felt I was with the right person. I'm with a new guy now who never pressured me and told me he loved me either way. And after eight months, we finally had sex, and it was wonderful. My only hindrance so far in the bedroom comes down to blowjobs. I've gotten a lot better at them lately, but I just can't seem to get myself to let him come in my mouth. I know how immature that must sound, but it nauseates me just to think about it. I don't have a problem performing the blowjob. I Can tolerate the pre cum. It's just the actual cum that grosses me out. Are there any tips you have or methods you know to help me face the cum digest just head on. I really want, no pun intended. I really want to help be able to give him the full pleasurable experience because he's the best boyfriend imaginable and I just want to do this for him. Especially since blowjobs are his favorite. Thanks, Lauren. Okay, Lauren.
I would say tequila, right?
What? Tequila. She's so drunk and can't take and then she throws up all.
No, I mean like some, I don't know is some girls do it and some don't. Like why? I don't mean is it really a big deal?
I don't know. I mean honestly, I've always, I've always swallowed because I just didn't know you shouldn't. Like I was taught like you have to swallow. Like I was like, okay.
I mean I never thought really love me. You would, right?
No, but I just thought like.
But a lot of women, guys are so simple and stupid. Like they don't care either way, you.
Know, clearly her boyfriend. Okay, Lauren, here's my question for you Don't. Do you. Is he telling you, honey, your blowjobs would be. I'd give them a 10, but they're only a 9. Because you're not smiling. Or are you creating this barrier in your head that you're doing something wrong because women are such a lot of women and men can be such pleasers, but we're just peelers. So I'm wondering. You're probably giving me a killer blowjob if you don't swallow. That's fine. You could if you want to try. I mean, you might have had a bad experience once and maybe I think a lot of people have bad sexual experiences like one time in their life and they just swear things off forever. Thinking some guy had really bad calm, right? Went up her nose or who knows?
It's like a shot. Just do it real quick.
You know, I'm really bad at shots though. But I can swallow calm. I can't do shots.
But also another thing is as she's like pulling away, she might be slowing down and messing up the process.
This is what she says. Do use your hand. When he's about to ejaculate, just give him a great hand job with lots of lube or make sure it's already lubricated and just let him finish. That way if you don't want to swallow. But also my website gives great Tips on hand jobs. Because we actually had a. I'm Blowjobs. But we had a great hand job debate going on for many years on the show. Also, you could try Masque. This is a product we used to always talk about. Masque. M, A, S, Q, U, E. Sexual flavors. It's. It's a strip. It's like those Listerine strips that you put on your tongue. It masks the taste of semen. And you can get them. I think you can still get them at good vibes. And it literally, like. Like, the blowjob will taste like cherries or. What is it? Watermelon, Strawberry orange?
Aren't they based out of Santa Cruz, California, Mask? I think so. No, they're not.
They're not, no. But they sell out a good vibe. They're little strips, but also, you know, you could also position the penis towards the back of your mouth when he's about to ejaculate, and you might not taste it as much. As much. But I would also check back in Lauren with your guy, because I don't know. I mean, I don't do guys.
I can't imagine any guy that really actually gets upset by that.
I mean, younger. I don't know how old she is. I don't know.
I think most guys are surprised when it happens.
When they do swallow.
When they do. Yeah. They're just like, okay.
So most women don't. I really like. It's so funny. This is my very first podcast.
Most women don't.
That was in podcasts ago. I remember it was. My friend Ed was on the show, and he was like, we were talking about blowjobs. He's like, I just feel like if a woman swallows, like, I don't want her to do it right away because I feel like it's such an intimate thing. And I was like, I just. I learned that the guy's totally trying.
To sleep with you.
No, he wasn't. He was my good friend. You remember Ed? He wasn't trying to sleep with me, but I was like, I didn't even. He's like, you're such an ace. The Jewish, like, good Jewish girl. Like that. Like, that's what you learn. You just, like, swallow. He's like, you're such a. Like, people, please. I'm like, I just.
I don't know.
Like, I didn't know you couldn't. I'm like, you just swallow. Take one for the team.
I'm thinking in 2014 that most girls do swallow. I. I would say out of my sexual experiences, maybe like, 20% don't. It's like 80% do.
Out of the three women you've been with?
Yeah, out of the three.
What do you guys. So do you. Don't you don't you decide every other time like you like it. You don't. You do. See, you don't. Never.
I just. I mean, I'm not super excited about blowjobs.
Right. I got it. So many people aren't. Like, so many women just don't love. I did a workshop on this Last week was part of. It was like, how to Learn to Love it is what I wrote an article for. Who did I write that article for, Lauren? How to Learn Love the job. Was that glamour, too? I think so.
You know one of those websites. Well, the thing. The thing is also, like, we get emails all the time. We're like, oh, she's not really into blowjobs. I just don't think she ever will be, you know? So if she's really against it and she doesn't want to do it and you force her, like, really, like, talk into it, it's not. No pun intended. It's gonna suck anyway.
Right?
It's not gonna be a good.
You don't want to force anyone to do it. That is very true. You don't want to force anyone to do it. But I'm just again, going back to women not liking things because maybe they had a bad experience, but if you don't like the penis, you don't.
Yeah, but if they're open to it and they want to do better, then, yes, they should take your workshops. But if they're not into it, just let it go. Same thing with anal sex. Like, you're not gonna talk them in.
It is anal sex month coming up.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, but you're not gonna.
But no, but if you, like, pressure them, like trying to wear them down to get them to do it, they're not gonna do it. Maybe one day they'll just, like. They'll bring it up. Just find. Just bring them around their friends that do anal sex. And then they'll say how amazing it is, and then they'll talk them into it because a guy is never gonna be able to do it.
But the thing is. Well, I was talking to Mike Catherine. It's so funny, you know, Mike Catherwood. So I host Loveline on Thursday night with Dr. Drew and Mike Catherwood. And so the other night I was there, and I was actually just doing my podcast there without you. Sorry, it was sad, but we had A comedian. It's a funny. We just posted Adam Ray. He's a comedian from a bunch of different things. You should check out the podcast. But after I was leaving, Drew and Mike were coming and doing their podcast, and Mike just walks in and says he's like, emily's ass is open for business. I'm like, what are you talking about? That's how he greeted me. And so then he's like, come on, do our show. So I went into their show, and we were talking about it. I said, I think that the same thing I was just saying earlier about blowjobs, that there's a lot of work women who think they. Who don't like anal sex. And there's just women who legitimately don't like it. But there's also women who had really bad experiences with guys who didn't know what they were doing. And they didn't use lube. They didn't warm them up. They shoved it in. It was painful. And so they swear it off forever. Because Mike was talking about his wife who doesn't like it. I was like, well, she's your wife. He's like, I want it. But she's. I'm like, well, maybe we could figure out if there's something behind that, because you can reassociate whatever your associations are with it and kind of try to make it, like a good experience if it was someone who's like, more of an experienced lover.
Well, you know, I've been thinking about this a lot recently, and.
In my experience, no one has ever treated me lesser because I was like, I prefer not to do this.
Right?
But recently I was like, maybe I want to learn to become the blowjob master. How do I do that? And I thought about it a lot. I asked my friends advice, and the advice I got was really interesting. It wasn't read about technique, right? It was read stories by women who talk about the psychological experience of doing it and why you find it hot. And if you approach it from that perspective, if you really figure out, how can I make this fun for myself intellectually, it's true.
Well, that's what I talk about my workshop, is that it's a mindset. It's like you're giving them. You're in control of their pleasure. You're giving them this ultimate pleasure that they want, but it also comes back to you because you're feeling like, here's a person I love, this penis is an extension of them, and I'm gonna do something that's gonna make him feel Good. And what comes around, goes around. And hopefully you'll.
What comes around.
Everything's a friggin innuendo on this show. So it's hard to talk about. Yeah, tips. But no, you're right. It's not like I'm. And then there are the tips. But the number one thing is like always like enthusiasm. Like you don't want anyone going down on you either. As a woman who's just like sitting there like you know, not into it. Cause you can tell you're like, I'd rather just. Just have you go make me dinner or something and then do that. And so you gotta be enthusiastic. But also there is a way to change your mindset to be like. And that's what I'm also saying for the first person who emailed in, the woman who that about the blowjob is that Caitlin is that she could listen to some of the stuff and think about if there's a way she can change her mindset around it around like it's something that you love, it's extension of their body and like that you are in control of their pleasure and you could just make them feel good and that makes you feel good giving, receiving all that stuff. Okay, so we gotta wrap up the show. Thank you so much. I so appreciate you guys being here. From Ziviti, Sayan and Nadia. Right? I say that right? Nadja. Okay, Good. Thank you. Ziviti.com. anything else? You guys and your, your website and your Twitter, Instagram, anything you want to.
All that stuff, it's all Ziviti.
So if you go to everything, Zivity.
Z I V I T Y, Facebook, Ziviti, Twitter, Ziviti.
So awesome when you lock all that stuff down.
Don't.
Yeah. We also have really unique names, so not really any.
What does it mean?
It's just a made up name.
I like it. That's why no one has it.
Yeah.
Well, you're doing beautiful work and hopefully we can do some future collaborations. But everyone should check out your site. I would love that. And Menace.
Yes.
I love seeing.
Oh, I started another Instagram account for people because you know, I love traveling. Just some small little Instagram account.
What's it called?
Best Vacation Photos. If you follow that.
Why do you make it separate from you?
Just because a lot of my friends have like awesome photos and then so just like one place is to share them together. I will follow you, check it out.
Okay, cool. And great. And we'll do that. And follow me on Instagram, Twitter, everything and like my sex, family page because you know what happened, you know what went down with these people. So just do that. And thanks everyone for listening to the show. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com.
Hey guys, thanks so much for listening to the show. So, you know, we're always talking about if you listen to this show, how can we spice things up, keep things interesting? Well, have you ever heard of a massage candle? Well, it looks like a regular candle. Beautiful. Sit it on your, you know, sit it on your table, use it at your house at night, whatever it is. But it instantly turns into massage oil. And massage, as you know, helps you get in the mood, set the atmosphere. And the warm, luxurious oil feels amazing when you pour it on. So these candles have all natural ingredients, which means they're healthy and moisturizing for your skin. And it's your secret weapon in the bedroom. If you want to spice things up, get your partner in the mood, have incredible sex. The feedback has been amazing. And this was just in from one of my listeners, Emily. I bought a candle. My girlfriend was skeptical at first, but agreed to try the warm oil on me and first gave me a back rub. Then I reciprocated and we had amazing sex. She could not stop talking about how good the candle smells and how great the massage oil feels. And I'm convinced that the scent and the candle helped us through some of the barriers to sex that we have faced lately. So I created these candles so you can have the best sex of your life. So go to emilyandtoni.com, use code EMILY for 20% off, that's emilyandtoni.com use code EMILY. Thanks for listening to the show. There's one overlooked mineral behind better sleep. Sharper focus, stronger muscles, and a healthier heart. And at least half of us aren't getting enough. Most people don't realize they're running low on one of the most vital minerals for human health, magnesium. And here's the thing. No single form of magnesium can deliver all of its benefits. That's exactly why Qualia Magnesium plus was created with 10 highly bioavailable forms of magnesium plus over 70 essential minerals. It provides total magnesium support, helping you sleep better, think clearer, move stronger, and feel your best every day. And honestly, when you're less stressed and more energized, your intimacy and desire naturally benefit too. Sure, magnesium can help you sleep, but Qualia Magnesium plus goes beyond that. It's a whole body nourishment for how you think, move, connect, and feel more than just a sleep supplement. It's a foundation for daily well being which absolutely supports a healthier sex life. Getting enough magnesium from food alone is harder than ever due to depleted soils and chronic stress and our body's reduced ability to absorb it as we age well. Qualia's Magnesium plus formula is non gmo, vegan, gluten free and designed so all the ingredients work together for comprehensive magnesium support. And personally I've been taking Qualia Magnesium plus in the evenings and I really noticed calmer nights and clear mornings and just feeling more grounded in my body which always makes intimacy feel more accessible and enjoyable. It's become such an easy part of my nightly routine. Experience the most trusted magnesium for your purity, potency and performance. Go to qualialife. Com sexwithemily for 50% off. And here's a bonus use the code sexwithemily for an additional 15% off your order. That's Q U A L I a life.com sexwithemily thanks for qualia for sponsoring this episode.