7 Dec 2025 · 33 min
Krista Anne, creator of the Fantasy Lover Kit, talks through what men get wrong in bed: rushing, being too rough, not listening. She covers confidence, kissing, touch, oral sex, and using role-play and toys to keep things fresh in long-term relationships.
Chapters
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A glass of wine with friends.
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Look into his eyes.
They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they call them, in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend?
Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. A girl's gotta have her standards. Oh, my. Do women know about shrinkage?
Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean? Like laundry? It shrinks.
Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me?
Oh, my God. I feel shrink.
Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of.
Girl you just play with.
You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and anything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to all of our podcasts. Sign up for our mailing list, which you better do, and asap. I need your email address because we're going to be sending you a free report on the five biggest steaks you are making in bed. So check out sexwithemily.com, check out all of our podcasts. And I'm really excited for today's show because we are talking to Krista Anne. Hi, Krista. Hi. Hi, Krista Anne. Is it Krista Anne or Krista?
Either one.
Okay. Krista Anne. Krista. Krista Anne is a hot woman, and she's also a very smart woman because she created her fantasy lover kit, and it's basically her fantasy lover formula. Is that what you call it?
Yes.
Okay. And this formula was created so to help men be better in bed, because, let's just face it, like, I don't know. Krista, you've had experience. Like, I've had. Like, some men, they just don't know what they're doing, which is why I started the show nine years ago. To help guys become better in bed.
Yeah, they don't. And sometimes it's just the most simple things that you have to change. But, yeah, guys just really don't know all the time.
They don't know, do they? And so that's why I think. Okay, so I. So, Chris, tell me a little bit about yourself and how you got started and what made you decide to create this product.
Well, I am in the entertainment business. I do modeling and acting. And with that, I always feel that I've had the pleasure of meeting all types of guys, like, in all different areas of the business. And I've always, like, wanted to, I guess, like, use a way to, like, find a way to I'm very comfortable with my sexuality.
Right.
But it's not always, you know, it goes beyond just a picture. Like you can be a centerfold, and that's great. But I enjoy my. I enjoy what I do because I'm comfortable with my sexuality. So I think it's important to use that for. For other things as far as helping people, you know, because this helps men, but you're also helping women.
Exactly.
So.
And you were also. So you were Penthouse. You were Penthouse Pet of the Month.
Yeah. Penthouse Pet of the month for April 2006 and pet of the year runner up for 2007.
Wow.
That's hot. I know. And if anyone wants to check you out, we're going to be talking about a product that she sells. We're going to tell you all about it because it kind of blew my mind. And you can check her out too, at sexwithemily.com fantasy where you can watch her video and all the things that she teaches and you can even maybe we'll tell you more about it and see if it's for you, which I think it is. So basically the whole idea of this is basically that I feel like men are. A lot of times they're talking such a big game and they're acting so confident. And I just feel like time after time, women are, you know, we're a little disappointed in men. And so I feel like some of my questions for you after watching this is.
First of all, do you think that these methods that you teach work with every women, every woman's body? Like, how do you tweak them? And how do guys know how women's bodies work differently?
Well, part of what we teach is paying attention, you know? No, of course not. Every single woman's different. Everyone likes different things. Just like men like different things.
Things.
But the key is to, you know, start. Start slowly. Like, don't pressure her. Don't make her feel uncomfortable. As soon as you make the woman comfortable, she will open up to you and then the process could continue on. As far as paying attention to what she likes. Remember what she likes. Yeah. I mean, it's. It's really important. And I think guys sometimes just want to rush right into it and they don't really. They don't realize, like we. We talk about different things where it's like the seduction part, the foreplay part, and than the actual sex part. I mean, there's so much more before you even get to just having sex. I know.
And then I feel like after a while, especially if you're in your long term relationship that a lot of men don't realize, like the whole like seduction part, that, that is so important for women, that the brain is our largest sex organ and we really need to be turned on. So in your fantasy program, you actually talk about seduction for a while. You talk about how men need to use women's, you know, the power of a woman's imagination to turn them on. Like, it's not just like, oh, I've got a boner, so let's start, you know, going at it. It's like, how do you turn them on?
Yeah, like that's a whole nother thing. I mean, if you're just, you know, having a relationship where it's a booty call, as they say, or whatever, that's one thing. But if you really want someone where after you've been intimate with them for the guy and you want the girl to be like, wow. And thinking about you and wanting to do it again, it's not just sex. It's just, it's a lot more to it. I mean, I know in my personal life just having that mental connection is so huge.
So huge. So you teach that to men, how to connect to women on that level in your, in your, in your, in your, in your DVDs or in your video. Your downloads, people can just download this, right? And watch it.
Yeah, exactly. You just download it. It's. It's really, really easy and it's just a step by step. It's. While we were filming it, it was actually funny because you, you know, some of the stuff comes natural to you, but then some stuff doesn't. Like, even for me, I have to sit there and be like, wow. Like, if you have to do like a play by play, you really have to, you know, plan it out in a way where it works for you and it works for him. And like you were saying, it doesn't always work for everyone. So you have to generalize it. But yeah, it's. It's broken up into four parts and it's really simple.
I know, it's really, I'm just like so glad. I'm like, thank God. And you're like two, like, let's be honest, like you're you and your friend, I'm telling you, her name again is your friend Lux. Lux. Yeah. You guys get together and you're like, we're two hot chicks and we've been disappointed by the hottest men in the world. Like, we've dated football players, we've dated the fucking athletes. We've Dated models, we've dated actors. And we are disappointed. And I'm just saying, I've been hearing that more and more, too. Not that men are terrible. We love men. I just feel like you're not going to learn it in school. Women aren't going to teach you. And this is how, you know, have other, you know, like, just your regular girlfriend was not going to teach you. But this is something where it's actually, like, you guys really get into it here.
So, like, we do, and it was great because we've been friends forever, so we know all about each other's relationships. And it helps because, again, sometimes you're teaching, like, very basic stuff. But when you have to teach it, you know, it can come off silly. But we're serious, you know, like this. If you just follow these. These simple steps, you. You can make that moment last so much longer. I mean, I know that.
What?
Just I'm with a guy, and he really is able to stimulate, you know, me in every single way. I mean, I'm gonna be thinking about him for days until we can hang out again.
I know, right? With a guy that gets you, like, when you have those, like, crazy, crazy experiences, you're like, oh, my God, when can I see him again?
Exactly.
I got it. So, okay, so a lot of what you focus on in the product, like in the first part is touch. And I feel like you guys say this too, that men kind of grab. They're kind of grabby and they don't know exactly how to touch women. So where do you. Not all men. Not all men, but a lot of men. So where do you like to be touched? You think that men miss, like, what are your forgotten erogenous zones?
If I'm already being intimate with someone.
Yeah.
Like, if they're ever like, God, I wish he touched the back of my knee and he hasn't touched the back of my knee. You know, is there anything I knew?
Yeah, I mean, I enjoy my hair.
My neck.
But, you know, what is.
It's not even about, like, for me, it's not about, like, a specific place. It's how they touch you. Like, I like when I can almost feel the passion and emotion through their touch. And like you said. Exactly. Men just think just grabbing and slapping and pulling and whatever, and women need to ease into it sometimes. Sometimes all women aren't into something that's either more rough, and then some women are. Again, it all comes down to paying attention, I don't think. I think guys are so focused on. Let's just Almost like, let's just get this done. And I want to please her, and I hope I please her. And they're all in their head, and then we're all in our head and no one's paying attention to each other.
Exactly. And the biggest thing that men need to do is pay attention. Did she moan? Did she sigh? Did she grab the bed sheets? Yeah.
Because women will let you know. You just have to pay attention. Women will let you know whether she likes it, whether she doesn't. Even from the first moment you meet her, if you walk up to her at a bar, in a club, or in a restaurant, wherever, and you maybe want to just, you know, graze her arm or shoulder, you can tell whether she's interested in that very first second.
Yeah. What's the sign? You can just tell if they pay attention.
I mean, yeah, you can just tell. They gotta pay attention if someone's interested in you or not, but.
Right. I got it. Okay, so let's move on to Connell. So do you think that cunnilingus is really okay? So I always talk about, I give, you know, oral sex tips all the time for men. Do you really think it's as complicated as everyone makes it out to be? Are there techniques that work, like, just like with oral sex on a man? Like, I feel like there isn't as much guidance for oral sex and women. So, like, what are your top oral sex tips for men, for men to do?
Yeah, I. I would say, well, we all know the main focus. I guess you can say what we do is we teach certain techniques that are.
More successful than others. I would say.
Again, it's difficult because.
Women are different.
Some women like it harder, some women like it softer. Some women like, you got right, guys.
Gotta feel it out. They gotta ask the woman and they gotta feel it out. Is this a good baby? Is this bad? You know, should I go a little softer? Should I go a little harder? Do you want my tongue more? Do you want my fingers?
But we're very big on starting things with kissing. Like we think just getting the girl like worked up and just having. Even if it's just a one night stand, like, try to bring the passion into it. That's what a woman will remember. So when you're touching her and using, we even give, you know, the proper kissing techniques. And then little by little, you'll, you'll see again what she likes and what you don't like, you know, it becomes very repetitive. But again, it's just simple thing that guys don't follow.
Oh, and you teach this special kissing technique. I want to know.
Well, just like, you know, again, just to not rush into it.
Exactly. Well, that's the mistake. I think that a lot of men rush right into sex. Women are not ready. I always say we can't go from 0 to 60 just because you're turned on and you're ready to go. We are not. So kissing is huge. And also in long term relationships, kissing is one of the first thing that goes. And so I feel like you have to always continue with the kissing. So that's important. I'm glad that you guys cover that.
Yeah, we do. We add the fact that kissing is really important. Even just starting the foreplay. I know for me, I like when sex is a whole production. It's not just about the intercourse. It's slowly moving from, you know, from just from, from kissing from touching to oral and whatever else and.
Right. It shouldn't just be like foreplay, intercourse. Like I almost would like to get rid of the word foreplay and just have it be like foreplay. Like it all is one thing. Like we need it. All right. You can go from having sex back to oral sex back to whatever. So what about using their fingers during oral sex? Don't you guys, you guys talk a little bit about how men can properly use their fingers to do you. I know that's a case by case basis. Some women love fingers, some women don't. So what do you, what do you guys, what do you think? What about for you personally, do you like fingers?
Well, for me it does depend on the night and on the moment. I can't say I always love it. It's just one of those things that.
I just have to feel it out per night because it's strange. It's not always my favorite. But we teach where if you're going to do it, don't be so aggressive. Like when you're doing things that you're not sure the woman that you're with definitely likes. Just start slow because the worst case scenario is she'll let you know that she doesn't like it or to move on to the next thing and then that's it. And a great thing about.
Another thing that we teach men is a hygiene part. Especially comes to using fingers. Oh. Because that's also. Could be, that's something again that you would think was so simple. You would think was common sense. But you'll be surprised.
Okay. Yeah. Like hi. Okay, good. I want, I want to hear it.
We'll hear the DVD again. You would think it was, you know, just normal common sense. But wash your hands.
Wash your hands. No. It's so annoying. I'm like, we just went out. We were both eating the French fries. I saw you touch. You went to the bathroom, the whole thing.
Washed your hands.
Guys don't wash their hands. Why don't they cut your fingernails?
Wash your fingernails. I don't know. It's just something that I guess, you know, guys are just being guys, and then girls start to not even think about it. But when we really break it down, trust me, you'll. You'll never. Like, you'll always have it on your mind now because it's true.
Like, so true. I love that. Okay, so I have to ask you a question real quick. I gotta give a shout out to one of my sponsors, which is actually, it's called Max for Men, and it's a product line that's all about increasing male pleasure, attraction and performance. So they make, like, all these, like, amazing. Like, they make this stimulating sex prostate gel. Have you ever stimulated a man's prostate?
I have not.
Okay, but you do know women who have. Men can, like, freak out with their prostate. So, yeah, Max for Men makes this amazing product. It's Max for men. The number four men.com use coupon code EMILY25 for 25% off@maxformen.com they've got amazing products for men. They're like pheromone infused. They could do your prostate. They have masturbation creams. They have so many great things. So everyone should check out Masque for Men. All right, so how about. Okay, we're talking about fingering. And then I wanted to ask you about.
Do you think that.
What, for you personally, is there any position that you wish that men did more often when you're having sex with him, intercourse or anything, do you wish that there was a position? Like, is there any secret position that you think men don't know about or that they should do more that they don't do?
Well, for me, in my personal life, I enjoy when the guy is on top. There's just everything. I mean, it's very basic, but there's also so many different things and variations that you can do just by that. But that stimulates me the best.
Okay.
We teach, though, how you can turn just ordinary positions just by moving her hips or moving her legs. So you can take an ordinary position but really make it into four different ones.
That's what I like about your program, is you actually have. That you were talking about. You just move her Leg a little to the left and she could have this mind blowing orgasm that she never had before.
Which is exactly. You can use, you know, like, you can prop her up, like put a pillow under her. There's just, there's so many things that we teach by just taking basic stuff, just tweaking it here and there, and you can turn it into a whole new experience.
Right. Okay, now what about her mind? How do you use imagination and fantasy to turn around? Like, do you. You guys talk about that too in your.
We have a role play section.
Fun. Okay. How can you teach that to men?
Yeah, well, the key to this is sometimes with role play, this is for maybe people that have been in relationships and just are looking to spice up their sex life. Now, you can still do it with someone new, but I think you have to find ways to introduce the topic before you're walking in and, you know, reprimanding her for being a bad student.
Right.
You really have to think about this. But we just, we tried different scenarios into just how to spice it up. Like, it's very simple. I mean, you can take some of your own costumes that you wouldn't even think that you had in the house and, and really just turn it into whatever fantasy you want to.
Exactly. And it's so fun. Like, for me, personally, I love. Like, even I'm just wearing like a sexy. Whatever it means what I wore to work. Like, I'm wearing a dress and the guy I'm with is like, oh my God, that's so hot. Like, pull up your dress, take off your, you know, your stockings, and we're gonna do whatever. Like, I just think for a woman too, it's hot to dress up for your partner and to hear from him that that looks good, what you're, you know, what you're wearing and to be appreciated and just play dress up with whatever. You have that slutty dress that you have in your house that you never have a chance to wear out one night when he comes home, put it on. You know, that doesn't have to be that difficult for me.
I think the most successful times have been when those situations were a little spontaneous, but it was also someone you were comfortable with.
Exactly.
So it's that balance. Because a lot of people, for some reason, role playing gets a bad.
It's a bad rap. You're right. Like it's some difficult thing. Like you have to have scripts or something.
No, you, you don't. And that's the thing. I mean, you can get very simple. Like you, whatever you find hot. Just go with it, you know, do it with someone that you're comfortable with and just. And it's like playing make believe like what we did all of our lives when we were younger. It really doesn't have to be so. Okay, ready and action. You know, it's just make it fun and it could be something really interesting to spice up our relationship that maybe has. Has lost it a little.
Exactly. And that happens in long term relationships and even not so long term relationships. You know, everyone loves the sex the first two months and it's like, how do you keep it going? Yeah. So what you guys talk about is being a sexual master. So what do you think a sexual master has that other men don't have?
I think knowing themselves because guys a lot of times don't. It's hard for them to please someone else when sometimes they don't even know how to be pleased and they don't know what they want. I think that you need to really become like almost like sexually confident to really like master being able to please someone else.
Right. It's confidence. It always comes back to men building their confidence. And that's what you guys do a lot in your fantasy series. And do you guys want to know.
What we're talking about?
We're giving you more information at the end. But if you go to sexwithemily.com fantasy you can see Krista Anne in her DVD and her video explaining to you her series, which is pretty cool. I mean it's broken up into four parts and it's, you know, it walks you through like fantasy seduction, fantasy foreplay, fantasy sex and fantasy roleplay. And you guys really get into it. Like over 50 positions and all that stuff that mentioned out Jesus. 50 positions.
And we show, we don't just explain them, we actually show you how to do the position.
That is amazing. And you guys are hot. So who doesn't want to watch you guys doing that? I mean, please. Okay, so what are the biggest mistakes that you think if you had to Name Krista Anne? 3 biggest mistakes that men make in bed. What do you think they are?
Three biggest mistakes? I would say one definitely that comes to my mind is rushing into it.
Totally agree.
Rushing into it is a big thing for me because I've just found that it ruins the whole moment and I'm just not going to. It's not going to be memorable.
Right.
They're just rushing, rushing right into it. Another thing is being too rough sometimes when it's uncalled for or it's not expected. Or maybe, you know, you're not comfortable with this person for it to be rushed. Like the kissing is rough and the touching is rough and the oral is rough and it's just. You're all over the place.
That I found.
Again than not paying attention.
Not paying attention. We're telling you everything. Women are telling you everything. We need just pay attention.
I could say it a million times, but it's the paying attention. Because if you just stopped and weren't so worried about.
Guys, a lot of times have their own body issues. So they're like, do I look good like this? Does she think I look good? Does she think, am I big enough? Am I too small? Am I too big? They're all in their head. Again, not paying attention because they're all in their head.
And.
And then you'll be surprised because we actually talk about this a little bit how, you know, women can sense that.
Right?
Women can sense if you're not paying attention to them, just as men can sense like when you're not. You need to find that connection, even if it's with a one night stand.
Right. You gotta be connected with them. You gotta eye contact, pay attention. It's not just about your pleasure. It's funny. I was laughing because when I was watching the video@the sexwithemily.com fantasy, I was laughing because you're like, you and your friend were like, most men roll over and go to sleep. Women are better in bed than men. Like that's why you. Because you've hooked up with a lot of women. Right? I've.
We both like have experimented in our.
So yeah.
Right.
And it's like so annoying when you've sex and he rolls over, go to bed and it's like. It is, it is true that men like, they do that a lot. So what do you think you've learned about what are some oral sex tips from performing oral sex on a woman that you could give to men? Like what, what do you think are some oral. I guess we already covered that a little bit. Oral sex. Did we cover oral sex tips? Did we just say that?
Yeah, we covered oral sex tips. But just to add to that, a big thing of how to keep guys interested after sex is we have this thing where it's called keeping them saying yes after. So for example, you can even say, you know, do you want like for. Let's just say you get up and get them maybe like a washcloth or something. They have to say yes. They'll say yes to that. Do you want Something to drink? They'll say yes to that. Do you want something to eat? They'll say yes to that. And it's not even like you're being at their beck and call, but there's something about keeping a guy focus and keep saying yes to you after you've had sex that keeps them interested.
That's so interesting. I like that. Okay, that is a very good point. So I want to know, okay, so you're this course. People can buy it. They can check it out@sexelemy.com fantasy. Oh, my last question, I want to know for you is toys. Do you ever use toys during sex or doing, like, when you're masturbating or with a partner?
I have used toys.
During sex. I don't use them on my own, but I think it is a fun thing to use with a partner because, again, it just brings something different. Right now.
I've also. Now I've been in relationships where the guy thought it was super sexy, and once in a while we would incorporate a toy. But I've also been with guys that have the mentality, like, what, am I not good enough?
Exactly. We're trying to get rid of that. Right.
So. And guys have to realize that's not. We're just trying to keep it fun and exciting. And if you really sit down, think about it, and do it, I feel like you'll find it way more sexy than you think it is. It's not that we're trying to replace you exactly. We're just trying to spice things up.
Exactly. We're trying to spice it up. And it can actually help you. I always tell men it's going to be their new bff. So what toy did you use? Do you recall? Because I'm going to give a coupon out. Now people can buy toys. They can go to goodvibes.com, use coupon code GVMILY20, and you get 20% off purchases of $100 or more. What's your favorite toy that you've used?
I like to. I keep it very simple when it comes to toys. It was just this, you know, pink waterproof rubber vibrator. But I like to keep it simple because I think sometimes toys get a little too distracting. Everything's moving, everything's spinning. Everything's going in different directions, different things. I like to keep. When it comes to toys, I'm very basic.
Okay, well, I think. I think clitoral vibrators are great for using during intercourse. I think that you can just go to goodvibes.com, check out couple vibrators if that's what you're interested in. And again, it's coupon code GVMILY20 for 20% off purchases of $100 or more. Okay, so I just, I love toys and I do think you're right that men, they get intimidated by toys. But I've actually recently used toy with a guy and he was like, oh my God, I didn't realize how hot it can be because he can still be very much involved with you and use the toy and it's like a double whammy.
100% right.
It's amazing. So I just, I love that you guys, I love your course. So if this is a four part course, it's set up with a college course. It utilizes conversational style lectures as well as fully demonstrative labs PDF ebooks to teach students and curriculum. And they're watching the two of you, you know, teach these. Teach men how to better sex. I think it's great work you're doing for men and it is the fantasy series. So if they go to set. But here's what's so awesome for about you guys. Is that today. So I guess it's normally $67.
Yes, it's normally 67, but for this week we're giving a 30% discount. So it'll come to about 47.
Oh my God, that's so cool. And it's like over three hours and bonuses worth of stuff and all that stuff which I think is so important. So what is the final thing? So what do you think is the main thing that guys like if you had to have like one takeaway or like your biggest takeaways from this that guys are going to learn by like downloading the series, I think it really.
Is just going to make them a lot more confident as a lover. Now there might be some things that they know, but at least if you've had them in mind and it's stuff that you've already been doing, then good for you. Now you know that you've been doing the right thing. And there's some missing. I think that when it comes to sex and relationships and anything, there's always more that you can learn. There's never, you never know everything.
Right.
It's important because it's a huge part of a relationship. And I don't think that guys always know exactly what they're doing. They, they talk a big game and then sometimes they don't know what they're doing. I mean, you know, you can be with the hottest, the richest or whatever. And when it comes down to having sex, you're like, what?
I know, it's so true. I just feel like I'm on this. I mean I've done my show for nine years but like lately I just feel like I've been hearing from so many of my girlfriends, women friends and my listeners that they're like, my guy's just not doing a bed. My guy's just not doing a bed. He doesn't know and I don't. And I am sending love to men now. Like I'm saying like I love men. I want them to like it's so easy. If they like watch a series like yours or they listen to my show, they can really learn just like a few things. Like because yeah, like they want to go to the gym and get better bodies. They might take advanced courses for work but people don't try to expand their sexuality and update their sexual bag of tricks. They do that. They have sex the same way at 18 as they're having at 30 because they never learned anything new. So I believe that it's continuing education which is what you guys are providing is so friggin important. So. And you guys are hot. Like who doesn't want to watch hot chicks teaching about sex? Oh my God. So I think it's great Krista Ann and I'm going to tell everyone this is what you got to do. Go to sexwithemily.com fantasy check it out. It's normally 67 but this week it's 30% discount at $47. And thank you so much. And also everyone, check out sex with Emily. Check out my book hot sex. Over 200 things you can try tonight. My iPhone apps are called Sex drive and Kegel camp. They will rock your world. Krista Ann, you've been amazing. Thank you so much for joining me today and thank you for all the great tips that you're giving everyone. Check out sexwithemily.com fantasy and thanks for listening to sex with Emily. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com.
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