SWE: Look Who's Back In Town...

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Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they call them, in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.

A girl's gotta have her standards. Oh my.

The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean? Like laundry? It shrinks.

Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me?

Oh, my God, I feel so good.

Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to all of our podcasts. Sign up for our mailing list, which you want to do asap, because we'll be sending you really important information that will improve your sex life and your relationship, which I want you. Which I know that you want because you're listening to the show. And we'll also. If you missed some podcasts, you missed some important blogs. You should check out our site because every day we update the website with really good information that will actually help you. So if you want to digest your information via podcasts, via video, blog, via video, we've got it all@saxmily.com and we just so would appreciate your support by checking out our site because try it. I think you'll like it. I am beyond excited for today's show. I have a very special person near and dear to my heart in the room, and I know to all of my listeners, you're going to be very excited that Menace is in the room.

Hello, everyone.

Hi, Menace. Welcome to Los Angeles. Finally.

I know. Well, how many months has it been since we recorded a show together?

Probably it was September.

September.

Five months.

Maybe five months.

I don't know. Already. I think so. It makes me really sad.

Probably not five months, but it felt like five.

It felt like five months. Three months.

Yeah. I moved to Los Angeles, everybody. So I'm gonna be doing some shows with you here. You're still gonna continue to do, like. Because you've already set up with, like, giant business down here.

Exactly. I gotta buy. I can't even have time for you. I can't remember your name.

You have an empire, so. Yeah, I moved here for. For a new radio job. I'm gonna be doing mornings, but part of a new morning show.

What is it called?

The Woody Show. And it's gonna be on alt 98.7.

It's like a boner show. Like a Woody.

No.

Okay.

It's a. It's a everyday morning show. It's a 98.

7.

Yeah.

And if they're not in Los Angeles, they can listen to it.

They can stream it on alt987fm.com or use the iHeartRadio.

That's so awesome. I'm just so glad you're here. So also, we have a lot of new listeners since you. You. You haven't been on as much. We do play a lot of throwback shows because Menace has been on, like, 8 million podcasts. But if you don't know men, you know, I do a lot of different shows, and I'm trying to release about two shows a week, and usually I have one with a guest. I have one with. Now I have one with Menace. Again. Sometimes it's just myself reading your emails. But Menace has been part of this sexual institution for. Well, since day one. Since day one. On the radio since day one.

Yeah, since terrestrial radio, but since we.

Were on terrestrial Radio on CBS Radio in 2006. Now, Menace, we didn't talk the first few years. In fact, he hated me because he was working the board and I sometimes swore on the radio and did things that were wrong. But then eventually we started talking and we had a nice dynamic. And so if you haven't listened to last shows with Menace, I just want. I want to introduce you to Menace because he's just freaking awesome.

Well, I'm back, everybody.

I'm glad that you're back. So how's Los Angeles treating you?

Los Angeles is awesome. I mean, San Francisco. I mean, I was born and raised in the San Francisco Bay area, which is, you know. You know, San Francisco is only 7 by 7 miles, so.

Right.

It's not really a big area, but outside of that area is gigantic. And that's where I grew up. And I miss it dearly, but I do not miss SF at all.

Me neither.

Because it's such a pain in the ass when I live there. Imagine every time you get off work and you want to go home, you have to circle your neighborhood for an hour to find parking.

It's horrible.

And then it just. Everything just became super expensive.

And right after I left the whole city toilet.

Super elitist, this, you know.

I know. I never thought you'd move, though, because you are Mr. Bay Area. He gets recognized in San Jose and things like that.

But yeah, I got offered an amazing job here, so I.

It was sort of a miracle.

Yeah, it took the.

He pretends he has a job, but really he came down to be on the search.

So I moved down here, and it is beautiful. The. The weather is nice. I got a swimming pool.

Oh, man, I just love it so much.

I know. I'm so glad that you're.

And what's cool is a lot of people that I already know moved down here because they were frustrated with all the things.

Yeah. San Francisco is kind of a cluster after.

It's the second. Second most expensive city next to Manhattan.

Yeah. Which is crazy. It used to be. I mean, I guess it's always been Expensive. But the rents, like my apartment, my little mini apartment I live in San Francisco, was like 1600amonth, which might even seem a lot to you people wherever you're listening in the world, but for San Francisco, that was pretty good. He now rented it for 4,000. Yeah, it just. Since I left a year ago, over a year ago, it's gone crazy. So I'm glad we're here. And today's show, let me just tell you what we're talking about. We're just going to be reading your emails. Because I get so many emails to feedbackexwithemily.com and I love hearing from all of you with your questions and I try to get to all of them, as you know. And since you know, Menace has some good insights sometimes into some emails, and he does.

Sometimes. A lot of times, you would always read all this hate mail, like, oh, Menace needs to be nicer to me.

People love you, Menace. They've missed you.

People hate you because you're so mean. And then what was it? I haven't been on the show, and it was just tweets, and everyone's like.

Where the hell's Menace?

Yeah, just tweets of love.

See, it's love.

I think you secretly wrote all those emails.

I didn't. Just to get you to move down here. No, people love you. They love us.

No, not that. All the hate mail.

Oh, I did not write. You think I have time for a hate mail? I don't even time to brush my teeth.

You got an intern to write it or something?

No, I don't.

Oh, he's so mean to you.

Oh, I love you. He's not mean to me. He loves me. Okay, so some of the emails we'll be reading are some. A guy who's got trouble with older women, also a high libido woman. What do you do about it? And then is the guy moving too slow for her? He wants to know if he should speed things up. We also got a little bit of sex in the news, and I wanted. I got it. And I got to tell you something real quick that's happening on a show this week. As you know, we've got a bunch of podcasts every week, but there's another show that I'm doing this week that's going to be released later in the week. And okay, I've never really dated. Actually, I've never dated online before, but I got sucked into Tinder.

Oh, no.

And if you haven't heard of Tinder because you've been living under a Rock. It's a new app for any phone, right. IPhone, any smartphone. And it's basically, people say, some people say, you know, there's two arguments. It's super superficial. It's really superficial. You're just looking at pictures and you basically, you put in the age range that you're looking for. You know, I'm looking for 25 to 35 year old women. You're looking for the proximity. You want them to live no more than 12 miles away. And if you're looking for a man or woman, that's about it, right? And. And you upload your pictures.

It's basically Grindr, which we've been talking about for years.

Grindr was an app in the gay community where that was a total hookup app. Everybody says that Tinder's a hookup app, and I think it is. It's only a hookup app if you.

Want to know that's on it. It's just straight hookup stuff.

See, but okay, that's not what I'm looking for. So I think I make that clear. Like, I'm not going to meet up with a guy and hook up with them. So I don't. But I feel like it's a choice. You could clearly. People do that. So anyway, Tinder just happened. I was in. You'll appreciate this. Valentine's Day, I was in New York all alone. I was with Amy Lawrence from Misadvise, which is a television show that Mendoci did on Bravo. We were both alone on Valentine's Day. Not alone, out together. And she's like, you haven't tried Tinder. So she signed me up for Tinder and I was like, oh, my God. It's like a game. You're like swiping, swiping. And it works in any city. So I started doing Tinder and then I came back here and I started just kind of doing it. But since I've been so busy, I actually have a time to date. So this one guy on Tinder.

We match. So what happens is if you like someone and they like you, then you're a match and then they message you. I wait for the guy to message me first. And he messaged me. He said, God, it's killing me. Your picture looks so familiar. Oh, I know. You were on Ms. Advised. I used to work at that production company. Now, I never met him. It was a big production company that did our reality show. He said, but I know who you are. I was like, okay. And then he was really funny. Funny banter back and forth but he kept asking me for plans. And every night I do Loveline with Dr. Drew, which is another in Mike Catherine, which is a great radio show and podcast. And then I kept. Every night I'm like, I got a show. I got a show. He's like, what do I gotta do? Come on your show to have a date with you. And I thought, that's a great idea. Eight years of doing sex with Emily, I've never had a blind date or any kind of date on the air. So tonight, or not tonight, this week, I'm going to be. He's going to come on. So listen to the show later in the week. And I don't know, I wish that you were going to be there, because I just think that you would frigging grill him. So if he gets a second date, maybe we'll bring him back, but I think that'll be kind of fun. Or not. What if I don't like them? I don't know. We're gonna get wine. We're gonna make it like a real date.

Yeah. And the other thing, I've never seen him.

I didn't Google. I've seen his picture, but I've never googled them. I don't know anything about them.

Well, secretly, you and I had a lunch in Los Angeles, and we were talking about Tinder a little bit. And you're opening it and you're showing it to me, and you're like, I can't believe I got all these matches. And I was like, no shit. Because every guy on that app is just liking every single chick photo.

Oh, really?

On there. And then once the chick likes his photo back, duh, it's gonna be a match.

Oh, so you think they don't even look at the picture?

I think they just go through every single hot one they think is everyone. They think.

That's why not everyone messages me.

They hit like, you know, and then whatever girl hits, like, back, then they're gonna start talking to him.

Okay, so whatever it is, some guys message me, some guys don't. But if you live a lot of conversations, guys have no time.

That's why, like, straight apps just suck. Because every guy is just gonna go through.

I know it is. It's kind of superficial, but it's kind of funny. And this guy was really funny, you know? I like funny. And we had entertaining exchanges, and I thought, why not have him on the show? But another thing, speaking of our secret. Life wasn't so secret, but we went to the Roosevelt.

I posted a photo you on instagram.

Check out Menace on Instagram.

Menace. M, E, N, A, C, E. And.

I'm Sex with Emily. Instagram. Follow me on Instagram and also Twitter. Sex with Emily and Menace. Miss. So anyway, we're having lunch at the Rock, and I asked you because Madness has had a girlfriend for a really long time. Like, three years now.

Yeah.

And okay, A, he never talks about her. B, I've never met her, and C, I brought that up to him, and he's like, oh, she said something about you, but I'm not gonna tell you now. I gotta tell you later. What?

See, this is where you're changing everything. She never said anything about you.

Okay? I'm like, well, why can't I meet her? Why can't we go?

I go, no. I said, okay, I knew this was gonna torture you because we had, like, lunch last week and, like, tell me now.

Yeah.

And I was like, no, I want to save it for the show. All right? You have met her before, okay. And you just don't know it.

All right?

Because. All right, so people have to go back and listen to some shows, but we had Candy from Real Housewives of Atlanta. She's not my girlfriend, but she. We had her. We had her in studio once, and so my girlfriend used to work with me. So the girlfriend. My girlfriend. While we were setting up for the show. Okay, My girlfriend was in the studio with us. Oh, and you thought she was an intern and you asked her to go get her some water?

I asked her to get.

Oh, well, you didn't. Like, she's not like. No, no. She's never. She never said anything about it, but I'm like, that was kind of a bad introduction because she's not. Like. She's not interned, I think.

I don't believe that I would ever ask any random. That's so not like me.

Swear to God. You did.

Well, maybe she was sitting there and you. I said, would you mind getting her some water? Because we were getting on the air.

I didn't know you asked her to get you some water.

I did.

All my life.

Okay? So now she hates me. Well, you know, that's still not me. I'm not a diva.

She never even said anything about it.

Did you introduce me to her at the time?

No. We were, like, in the middle of setting stuff up. We were just.

So why was she sitting there not to get me water? Like, what else was she doing?

We were just. We just, like, immediately walked into the studio and sat down and I said.

Get me some water. That sounds like I'M a diva, but you know that I'm not.

Well, I mean, it came off very devious.

Well, if she was sitting there doing nothing, I probably thought, I'm thirsty. Okay, so I met her once. So you're banging your former assistant?

No, she's not. My phone.

Whatever. She was working at your station.

She was working at my station at a. No, she was working at a different station.

Okay, so anyway.

Anyways. Yeah, so you. You know, I just thought.

She hates me anyway.

No, she doesn't.

I don't care. Fine. I mean, whatever. I. And I know myself and I know how you twist things. I would never randomly say, like if. Unless she said, I need water. Unless she said to me, can I get you some water? I get everyone else water whenever I have guests. I'm like, can I get you some water? I never in my life. And I've never asked Lauren, my sister here, or any to get me coffee, to get me lunch. That's not who I am, okay?

This is between me and you. This is between me and you. And, you know, take it how you want to be it. Anytime we get a high profile guest in, you get a little divish.

Maybe there's a lot going on, you.

Get a little divish. Just FYI.

Whatever. Whatever. You are fucking obsessed with celebrities I know you're talking about. Okay? So let's keep going. I'm sorry that your girlfriend never wants to meet me because I asked her. Give me a cup of wine.

How many times did I say that? She never even said. Said anything about it. I'm just giving you a hard time. See, now you're getting all pissed.

I know. I'm kind of cranky. You know why I have a concussion.

This is how we should act on misadvised. Because it would have.

I know. I've got a new reality show. I've got a new talk show that I just signed the contract today.

I hope you. You know, we act like this.

Me too. We're much better this way. But if you guys haven't seen Ms. Advise, you can download itunes. It's pretty freaking funny. So I have a concussion. Let me just say this, everyone, I have to tell you, preface. I have a concussion. And so. And Dr. Drew checked me out last night and he said, do you feel a little cranky? And I said, how the hell can I tell the difference? I'm always cranky. But no, I do feel a little more agitated. So if I seem that way, it's just because I dropped a mirror on my head before the Big earthquake.

Why didn't you go to the doctor?

Because I'm busy. And so I just saw Dr. Drew on Loveline last night.

Oh, my God.

No, I don't know for sure that it's a confirmed concussion, but I was moving this gigantic mirror in my apartment, and I was moving it. It was really heavy. Like, way too heavy for me to move, and it burnt. Bam. I tripped and I smashed my head on the glass. No, it's a really thick, nice mirror. And the whole side of my face is bruised, and I've had a headache, and I'm a little wheezy. Dr. Drew me, like, walk across the room, put my hands in front of my eyes, and do this whole thing. So he said I have concussion symptoms, so if I'm a little more agitated.

Than usual, it's kind of a big deal. You should go to the doctor for that.

He didn't say I had to. He said, just take care of it.

Oh, great. Put it on.

Dr. Drew, be casual. He's okay. He's a real doctor.

I know he is, but Jesus. Like, he definitely probably told you to go get it.

Check it out. No, he didn't check that. He said, I'm fine. He said, I'm fine just to rest. Like, I've concussion symptoms is what he said. And I shouldn't move heavy furniture alone, which is. That's another reason I'm like, God, I wish I had a boyfriend right now. And it's only at times like that I think, God, I wish I had a boyfriend to move into.

Take care of you. Yeah. Yeah.

See, it's nice. Why don't you. Here's some obsession.

Why don't you have a boyfriend?

You know, I'm really enjoying dating a lot of people and having a good time, per usual. The same story.

Yeah.

Yeah.

How is the dating life in Los Angeles? We got to catch up.

I know. Okay, let's catch up. Here's the problem. Let me just say something. Is because sometimes people listen to the show and they. People sign up at all different times. They just tune in. And some people have never heard you on the show, so they don't know that men decide this thing. And then some people are like, you guys didn't get in any sex talk for the first 20 minutes, and they get annoyed. But then some people love us talking, so those people suck.

Anyways.

I know. Okay, So I tell you about dating in la. It's been interesting. When I moved to LA about a year ago, I was dating a guy in San Francisco who I Left. He found out on Facebook that I was moving. Got to tell him ahead of time. Do you remember that? It wasn't that I was moving for sure. I posted on Facebook that anyone want to swap apartments? Because I wasn't ready to break up with San Francisco yet. I just knew I had to be in la. And then two minutes later, he texted me, you moving? Was he stalking my Facebook? Basically, you're moving to LA. And then turns out, 10 seconds later, I got an email from a friend in LA who was like, I gotta be in San Francisco in 10 days. Let's swap. So I moved here very, very quickly, and that relationship did not last long.

Facebook drama.

I know. So then I started dating a few guys here. Not at once, but I was dating, like, one after the next. They all the same name, which is interesting. Can't say what the name is. But it's weird.

You just had to put, like, 1, 2.

No, literally, in my phone. They're saved as, like, 1, 2. Like. Like, let's say it's like their name is Steve, which is not. It's like, Steve 1, Steve 2, up to Steve 5. Wow. Yeah, it's weird. But so. So they're all. And they're nice, and I meet a lot of guys and I get a lot of, you know, Tinder things and whatever, but. But I've been very. My business is. Business booming. It's great. So, yeah.

I love your new office.

Thank you. Venice. Came to see. I got a penthouse. It's Hollywood. You can see the sign. You know, it's not like. I mean, it's a shared. There's a lot of different offices, and it's a big space, and it's great, and I'm very happy.

What about Michigan? What about everybody else around the country?

Oh, my God. My family's here right now. My brother, you should see him. I know. With his three daughters. And it's been fun. I've been hanging out with them. They miss you.

Love you, brother.

I know. We should all, like, go out tonight or something. If I didn't have my.

Oh, I have people in town. So many people visit you when you live.

Everybody visits me. Everybody. It's amazing, and I love that. Well, here's the thing. So my three nieces are in from Michigan, and they got here on Sunday, and we're swimming at the pool. They're staying at the hotel. And I. We're swimming, and my little niece, 11, she's like, so do you guys get tornadoes here? And I said, no, we get earthquake. She goes oh. I'm like, no, no, no, don't worry. I've lived here for 20 years. I've had like four earthquakes. They're not bad, no biggie.

Yeah.

She's like, that makes me scared. I'm like, don't worry, it's not me. Earthquake. The next morning, I don't know if anyone heard there's like a 4.7 earthquake at like 6:50 in the morning. And she screamed across the running. And there's like my three nieces, my brother, his wife. Like it was chaos. So I woke. Did you wake up from it?

Yeah, I did.

My girlfriend was like 6:50 or 5. It was like early.

Oh yeah, it was like 6:35am yeah.

Which is way too early for me. So I texted my brother, I'm like, you up? He's like, of course. And then I was like texting with whole family. So. But, but now I think they think it's cool. Like they were in an earthquake, no one died.

Yeah, that's cool.

There's nothing bad, you know, for me.

Yeah, I would take earthquakes way over to tornadoes any day.

I said to them, I said, you know what, honey, listen to my niece. I said, at least it's not snowing because you just left like the most hellacious winter ever. People in the Midwest, I send my love to the west and the east coast in the United States because it's been friggin hellish and I've spent a lot of time in New York this year and it's just blizzards and crazy. But yeah, the family's good, dating's good, L A s good, it's. I really have to, gosh, I mean, sometimes I sound like a broken record, but I do believe like this. Sex with Emily. If you've all been following me, I have, you know, the podcast, but I also have my product line, Emily and Tony, if you need some more products.

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Just because. Well, especially in LA with the heat, you get really dry under there, right? And then if you use the under, you're down under. Yeah, down under comfort. It's awesome.

Yeah, it's like a deodorant for your intimate area so women can use it between their legs and it smells awesome and you really don't sweat. Like you can get a blowjob six hours after you showered and you don't have to do like a little shot. You don't have to wash down There because you're already. It's literally deodorant for your, like, women between their legs, men between their lower back, beneath your breast, your hands. My little niece is a dancer. I gave her some for her feet and her hands.

That's good.

Yeah. So thank you. I like that you like down under comfort. I'll give you more. And if anyone wants to try it out, go to emilyandtoni.com use coupon code EMILY. Get 20% off. What? Anything else we need to discuss before we get into some sexy sex time? What, like, are you, like. So did you ask her to move with you or did she want to move with you or. You're getting married and it just. You've been together three years and we're not getting. You're not getting any younger.

We're not getting married. We like having money and traveling because people that. People that get married, it is so over the top expensive. And why we just like.

I don't understand.

Don't want to have kids because they cost so much money.

Oh, you really don't want kids?

No, don't want anything. We just want to go hang out.

I know.

In tropical beaches. Like, what's wrong with that?

There's nothing wrong with that at all.

And you know, but I'm very supportive of marriage. I just, you know, if you can financially handle it, then I think then go for it if you found the person. But I just. It's just not the right time.

Married and have joint. You know, you go to city.

I mean, we can just go to city hall and get married and all that stuff. But then it's just like, she doesn't want kids either.

Good. So you're all good.

We hear like kids yelling at like restaurants and shit. But do we really want to deal with that for years?

I totally understand that.

And I don't want to like, clean other people's shit, you know?

Do you? Well, I had a dog once, but I don't have the dog.

Your dog's gone.

My dog, she's living in Palm Springs. She's living a much better life because if y' all remember my dog. I know. My dog was just. She needed to be outside 24 7.

What I tell you, day one, don't do the dog.

I know.

And. But do you know what's crazy is my girlfriend's begging me for a dog.

Don't get a dog. It's the hardest thing I ever did.

Yeah.

No, I love marriage. I love kids. For other people, but. Yeah, not for me. Not for you.

But it's fine. And I. Yeah. And I know that you probably listen to past podcasts and you wanted kids in marriage. Yeah. But now you're.

Now you know who you are.

No, right now. No, no, right now. Right now is strictly a financial thing. If I won the mega millions tomorrow and I had $200 million and f. Yeah, I'll. I'll have, like, four. Four kids. I don't give a crap.

Oh, so it's a money thing. But you still. People have money and who live like.

I understand, but I don't want to live like that. I want to be able to go travel and do shit.

No, I know.

And not have to worry about two little kids that might grow up to be freaking murderers or some shit and disappoint me later in life, especially if.

You raise them in Los Angeles. But it is true that. Yeah, having kids is a challenge, and a lot of people just, you know, they just do it and they struggle. And I think that a lot of people get married too young. It's been interesting being on Loveline because. Which, again, is a nationally syndicated radio show, but you can also find the podcast loveline, whatever.com or whatever. But it's interesting because we take so many callers, and it's just so many young people got married in their 20s, have two, three kids, and, like, what do we do now? And I always say, don't get married until you're at least 30 and you know yourself and you have a little more financial stability. Because we all fall in love really easily in our early 20s. Sometimes it's our first love, and we think, this is it. This is love. This must be marriage. You know? And sometimes it's more of an infatuation, and we grow and change so much. So just make sure you work on yourself and you know who you are before you get married.

And it's not like I don't know anybody that is married. Yeah. And has kids and is not happy and are able to travel. Like, I know tons of people like that. Just. I can't do it.

I got it. Well, I'm glad you'll be around to play with me for a while once your girlfriend gets over the fact that I asked her for water.

Yeah.

Okay. So anyway, Venice. So, yeah. We'll be doing shows every week now, Correct?

Yeah.

Okay. I love it. I love that you're back. Okay. So, sex and the news. Despite rampant homophobia, the south in the United States is the most gay into gay porn.

Of course it is.

It never surprises me that, like, the conservative, the south, they're always the ones like, I don't know, those are the.

Ones that are, like, trying to hide.

Exactly. They're like, repressive. Because living in the south, they might not be as accepting. Accepting of your. Of your sexuality, of how you identify. So pornhub recently did some research as to where the largest amount of gay pornography is being watched in the United States, broken down by states and without legal same sex marriage. Pornhub discovered that every single state in the south watches more gay porn than the average of states that have legalized gay marriage. And when it comes to states with legalizing gay marriage compared to those without, the former only watches 7% more gay porn. Pornheim discovered that every single state in the south watches more gay porn than the average of states that have legalized gay marriage. So anyway, the states where gay marriage is not legal that the most porn is watched is Mississippi, Louisiana, and Georgia. So that means we should just legalize gay marriage.

Yeah, that and marijuana.

Yeah. Oh, dude. Can you believe I thought there was a lot of marijuana shops in San Francisco, Louisiana.

It's everywhere.

Oh, my God. Every single. I'm like, is that a convenient. Oh, no, it's a pot shop. Is that. Is that a pharmacy? Oh, no, it's a pot store. I mean, every street and every street sounds like marijuana. We used to say this in San Francisco. It's gonna be legalized any minute.

Yeah.

I mean, completely.

Denver. It's crazy that it's just Denver that's just totally legalized compared to here where it seems like it. It's completely legal.

I know it's crazy what's happening, but, you know, I do think that has a lot of medicinal. Medicinal use for people and helps a lot. But you also, the young kids. The problem is when kids use it as a young age, their brains, like, 14, 15, 16, you know, their brains are still being shaped. And it's not great for young kids to use. So I'm worried that it gets into the hands of young children.

Well, that's up to parenting.

Yeah, but parents don't know if you're gonna get high after school.

Well, like, I don't know. My mother was. She steered me from drinking and doing drugs.

Like, how'd she do that? And then why did you start doing them now?

No, I think you mean in high school. She stopped you.

Yeah, I never. I never drank in high school and never did any drugs in high school or any of that kind of stuff.

So you're boring.

I wasn't boring.

You were popular. I know. That's good. And then what happened? You went to college and then.

No, not even in college. I didn't even do all that stuff.

Okay. Not even now. You're like sober?

Totally sober.

At least since last Saturday.

No, I had a. I had a glass of champagne before I got here.

Oh, you did?

Yeah.

Why didn't you bring me any?

Sorry, the bottle was open, I couldn't bring container.

Okay, we'll drink next time. Okay. So this is my second. I read this and I was like, wow, this sounds amazing, but it actually has a little dark end to it. Sex, sex and the news story. Woman has rare condition that gives her 12 orgasms a day. Her boyfriend can't keep up.

You hear about that all the time.

I know. The Seattle woman only known as Liz hasn't been the same since she suffered a three hour orgasm that put her in the hospital. It was fun for the first five minutes, she says, but it soon turned into a torturous nightmare that led to a terrifying diagnosis. She was told that the orgasms could come again at any time. Liz's problem began when she had a three hour orgasm that literally came out of nowhere. It was at this point when her boyfriend Eric took Liz to the hospital where doctors were baffled by what they saw. Doctors failed to stop the orgasm for determine its cause, but it eventually stopped on its own. The hospital visit was only the beginning of her problems. She continues to be surprised as the marathon orgasms come throughout, come ejaculate, come throughout the day. She comes throughout the day. First of all, can you imagine just standing in line at Safeway and you're like, ah, ah, hand me the oranges.

Yeah, but do you think she's like out loud like that or she just feels it?

She just feels it. But says doctors, eventually, this is. The dark side pinpointed the case. Bipolar disorder, which has been misdiagnosed as depression. And therefore she's been treated with antidepressants. So she was prescribed valporic acid, a substance that treats bipolar disorder. And it took her four to five months since they were completely under control. And it's probably been a year since she's had one.

I feel for anybody that has to deal with bipolar.

I know anything except. Right? Oh my God, it's so tough. I know. It's really. I know a lot of people who have it. A lot of people are coming out about it too. It seems like you hear more and more people in the media who have bipolar disorder. Yeah, but there's other problems that people have too and it doesn't have to do with their minds. Sometimes it has to do with their penis.

Yes.

Sometimes people come a little bit too quickly. One night stand only lasts a minute.

I thought you were gonna talk about my penis.

Oh, how's your penis doing?

We haven't even talked about it. What's going on on the show?

Did you.

I told you about it. I had. Should we get into it for the sex and the news?

Well, yeah, but let me just finish this.

Okay, go for it.

Is this dark? I'm trying to remember. Yeah, you? Yeah.

Okay. Okay, we'll give it away.

Here's the thing.

You can remember it. You never remember.

I do remember.

Honey, you don't love me.

I love you so much.

So listen to anything I say.

Stop it. So listen a lot of people, men. I said, do you want your one night stand to last one minute? I mean, there's a lot of guys who just don't last as long as they want to in bed. Okay. And there's not only that, it's not only if you last a minute, but women. Men typically ejaculate between three and five minutes, four to six minutes. Well, women take how long to orgasm?

Sometimes thousand years.

A thousand hundred years. Like sometimes it's 18 minutes. So what do you do with this orgasm gap? Well, now there is promescent, that's P R O M E S E N T. And it's basically a premature ejaculate. Premature ejaculation spray. It's like a delay spray. So it helps men to last longer. It's the only FDA approved treatment for premature ejaculation. And it has this absorption technology. So if you spray it on your penis, you wait five minutes, it won't transfer to her. She won't know that you're even using it and you'll be able to last longer. And by longer it probably means like double or triple to what you usually last. And you can still feel the sex. It feels amazing. And she'll have her orgasm and you'll have orgasm and everyone's happy. So that's promescent. You can just click on the banner on my website or go to their website. But Menace, what's up with your penis? You had some issues. I remember.

So in February I was going to the Grammy Awards and then I suddenly just have unbelievable pain.

Oh, my God. Yes, of course I remember this. I didn't know what to do with your pill. Okay.

All right. So I have unbelievable pain in February on my way to Grammy Awards. And it's Kidney stones. I have kidney stones again. I've been dealing with kidney stones for the past 10 years of my life. So I go, okay, fine. I go, wow, this is really. This hurts way more than usual. So I had to leave the Grammy Awards early. Went back to my hotel, and I was up until like 5am and then I go home. A couple days pass, the. The pain goes away, and then I go, okay, oh, it's time to pass a kidney stone. Kidney stone comes. It gets stuck in my penis. Because the kidney stone is so large. The kidney stone is the size of a nickel, right?

It's like, I didn't know it got stuck in your penis. I talked in the hospital, but you didn't tell me the penis part.

It was stuck inside my penis. I could feel it inside my penis, right?

Ouch.

So I go to the doctor and I talk to them. I was like, oh, yeah, I don't think I can pass this. And they go, yeah, you're not going to be able to pass it. We're going to be able to do. We're going to do three things. Number one.

Which number one or number two, we do 90% of the time. Number three, we barely ever do. Number one is we're going to take some tweezers, stick it in the. The hole of your penis, grab it and pull it out, right? They go, if that doesn't work, we're going to stick this little tube with, like a hook. Like, if you're going to go, you know, try to get a toy out of the little machine, right?

Animal.

We're going to grab it and then try to pull out your penis. And they go, number three, which we, you know, we never have to do. We're going to have to cut your penis open at the tip, like a cross symbol, and open it up and pull it out. I know this sounds very disgusting.

I'm in so much pain.

And then. So I go. I go, okay, okay, cool. The doctor goes. Goes out of the room, and I tell my girlfriend, I go, they're going to do number three. Let's get the hell out of here. I'm going to try to pass this. Like, you know, somehow. Somehow pass this, right? And I try to dart out of the hospital, and they stop me. They go, look, there's no way you're going to pass.

You try to dart literally, like, in your robe?

No, no, I put my clothes back on real. And I try to leave. They would not let me leave the hospital to go, look, you're not gonna be able to pass this. Just forget about it. So here we go. It's like 1am and they go, yeah, we gotta put you under, and we're gonna have to see if we can get this out. And of course, I wake up. They completely cut my penis.

No way. This is funny. You didn't tell me this.

This is not right. And then they're like, taking the kidney stone, and they. They. I'm, like, all drugged out. They take it, and they take a container and they're shaking in a rattled like. Oh, yeah, we had to break it up, and it was like, in three giant chunks.

Oh, my God.

Unbelievable.

So.

So then I go home and I sleep, and my girlfriend forgot to tell me. I was like, oh, I got to go to the restroom. That when I go to the bathroom, it's going all over the place. It's not like a single stream.

It's like I have, like, stitches all my penis. So it's like going four different ways, right? And they go, yeah, you can't have sex for six weeks.

Oh, my God.

And then after the six weeks, you have for three months. You have to have. Absolutely have to have sex with a condom. So you don't, you know, get infections. I still. I'm still healing.

How long has it been now?

It's been since February, but I still have stitches, so I still. But I've just, like, last week, started to be able to pee normally.

Oh, my God. I had. See, we have not talked since the hospital.

Yeah, I, like, had to sit down to pee.

Honey, are you in pain?

It was so. No, no, I'm not in pain anymore.

Can she give you blowjobs?

No.

Hello. With the condom on. Honey, this sucks.

I'm so sorry.

Do you need some condoms? Because I have a lot of them.

I'm gonna. Yeah, eventually need some condoms. So. Yeah, I haven't been able to have sex.

Oh, my God. So do you. Anything. Do you do anything to her to please her?

Yeah, I'll do things.

Okay. That's a lot of.

Come to find out.

Yeah.

Come to find out why I've been dealing with kidney stones, but why it was so dramatic this time is that they believe. Because I try to, like, cut soda out of my life because I'm in Los Angeles, I got to get in shape. You know, you got to be tan with white teeth. And the thing is, I. I cut soda out and I started just drinking tea. Well, come to find out, drinking tea is the worst fucking possible thing you could.

What kind of tea, though? Do you have any?

It's like tea java, which tastes amazing for me.

Of course, if it tastes that good, it's gonna be good for you.

No, it has no sugar in it or anything.

And then caffeine.

It has caffeine. And then. So I'm just drinking it like crazy every single day. And it just makes this super kidney stone that I cannot pass.

Hot tea or cold tea?

Cold tea. And then so now I'm just going like straight water.

Jesus.

But it's just like.

Absolutely. You saw. I did talk to you in the hospital, honey. That is so. I'm so sorry you went through that.

Absolutely.

Were you on painkillers for a while?

Like the first? I didn't want to start taking a bunch, so I. I took them for like, two days.

Do you have any left? Just kidding. Okay, honey. Well, I'm glad you're here with your penis intact.

Yes. So my penis is finally almost coming back to normal.

That is really tr. That is really scary.

I know a lot of people probably just barfed listening to this, right?

No, but it's important. Don't drink tea.

Well, no, I mean, if you are really, if you. If you are prone to kidney stones, just don't do it. And anybody.

Maybe. I don't know. But I'm really happy to be here in Los Angeles because I got a great new job. I.

Great new penis.

A great new penis. And you know, me, back in San Francisco, I was working two jobs. I worked from 11am to 12am every single day.

14 hours is the hardest worker I know.

And just like, consuming food, not getting any exercise at all. And now, like, my workload is much smaller.

Right.

And a lot less stress. So I'm. I'm happy to be here, honey.

I'm so glad you're here.

Finally having time to get in shape and, you know, just going out. I went hiking the other day. If you looked at my.

I know. I did see that. I almost fell over. I'm like, who implanted a picture of men next in nature? I never seen you in nature.

Yeah. So it's great. I love laughing.

LA is a healthy place. I love it, too. Except for I'm in my car a lot and I'm working a lot, but I plan to. I'm gonna go to Laguna beach this weekend.

Oh, sweet.

Yeah. My brother and stuff and the family, so we did some beautiful things around here. But, you know, life is too short to not. You never know. You know, one day you're working too hard, and the next day you get hit by a bus or your penis can get cut off. So you just wanna make sure that you're enjoying life and having a good time.

I mean, with honey, I started having anxiety like, oh my God, they're going to have to amputate my penis or something like that. Yeah.

Can I see it?

My penis?

Just kidding. Okay, so I'm sorry. Well, thank you for sharing that story and I'm glad that you live to tell. Don't drink any more tea. And you're healthy. You're going to be a new person.

Yeah, everything's almost back to normal.

Thank God you're okay. Yeah, I don't want to do without you. Okay, so we're going to get in some emails. Good. Not yet. So I'm going to go into the emails from the people. So we love hearing from you at feedback. Com. Emily, I love your show. I found it a couple weeks ago and I've listened to all the podcasts. I'm 23 years old. I'm a 23 year old female. My question is, what do I do if my sex drive is way higher than my boyfriend's when we do have sex? It's great. He lasts long enough for me to have an orgasm without with cholesterol stimulation. But having sex twice a week just isn't enough for me. Do I suck it up and masturbate or is there something I can do? Thanks. I look forward to listening to your next podcast. Sign, Samantha. Okay, Samantha, this is really common and a lot of times it's the men that has a higher libido or the woman. And I always say this is a case of mismatched libidos. I mean, there's a lot of people get together who just. And I could point out to you, maybe he's depressed, maybe he's taking meds, maybe he's doing drugs. Maybe that's why he doesn't want to have sex. I mean, you should look at all those things in his life. Because when men are feeling any of those things or they're abusing drugs or they're depressed or they feel like they're not making enough money, their sex drive might be lower. But in a global sense, there's just some people who want to have more sex than their partners. And most often the people who have a high sex drive are people with a low sex drive. So what you can do about it. So if you rule out all those things. So let's say your boyfriend is very, very healthy, but he just doesn't want as much sex as you. I think this is time when you talk to him about it. And you say, can we do some kind of compromise here? Two week, Two times a week isn't enough for me. You can ask him, you know, maybe you guys could have sex one more time a week. And maybe there's some kind of sexual fantasy he would like. Maybe he wants moral sex from you. But absolutely, you need to talk about it. This is not a deal breaker, per se, but it is something that you need to talk about right away. I find that most couples spend way too much long to. Way too long to actually start talking about sex with their partner. Like, they could be with someone for years. Like, we've never actually talked about our sex life, but it's like this huge problem. So just say, you know, I need a little bit more. And, you know, maybe if you want to masturbate, maybe he could come along with you. I always say mutual masturbation is a great way for couples to connect and to learn each other's bodies. But it's also kind of less work for each partner because he can, you know, masturbate and you can masturbate, maybe get a, you know, great vibrator. He could even use it on you if he doesn't want to actually have sex. So this way you're still engaging together and you're still, you know, having sex and connecting. So I'm wondering for you, is it more that you're. You feeling like you're not also getting enough, maybe affection from him? I'm just wondering more what this is about because you're being very specific that two times isn't enough. And I'm wondering if he's rejecting you after two or, you know, just what's going on. So I would just have a conversation about it because maybe again, he's going through a stage or he just doesn't want to have it as much, but he'd be happy to watch him. Wasn't it hot watching a girl masturbate?

No.

You don't think so? Menace is the only man who thinks it's not hot. But I've gotten.

Why do I care?

I know, but see, a lot of.

Guys get, I want to have sex with you.

Okay, but he doesn't want to have as much sex. Okay, but he might like that. Samantha, you're pleasing yourself. And I've got some amazing new vibrators. Of course, you know, I always have so many. But the new one is the jeeky. And it's by jju, who, you know, I also love J E J O U E. I need another brand to promote. Because seriously, like, I do love them. But if you go to sexwithemily.com goodvibes, you can check out all my favorite toys there. That's a good G Spot stimulator, which I have to tell you, if you orgasm through G Spot, that's a great one. Another great clitoral stimulator is Tenga makes a bunch of new toys. T E N G A. And they're so cool. They come in these clear glass containers, and it's got these rubbery. They're all these, like. It's from Japan. You'd like them. All these, like, really cool shapes and stuff and sizes that you will. They're great for clitoral stimulation. And as you know, I love the Mimi, which I think is the perfect sex toy for. Because you said you're a clitoral girl. So there was one more that I wanted to find real quickly.

The best story is, I think I've shared it on the show before. I had an old assistant that I worked with, and she lived in the same apartment building as me. And I was like, oh, I'll help you with your building your bed and stuff like that, because she just got, like, a new mattress. And we're pulling the mattress away, and we're in the bed, and then this little bullet falls down, and I go, what's this?

That Because a bullet vibrator.

Yeah, a little bullet vibrator is, like, just straight metal, and then with the rubber tip. And then I go, it looks like a. It looks like a bullet.

Yeah.

Oh, that's funny. And it had a little button on top of it. I hit the button and then immediately knew what it was right there. And she like her face.

So I know it's embarrassing when you find women. That's why I have a whole new system for my toys in my house.

I do sex with Emily.

I don't care. You're like, I don't care. I never seen one in person. But yeah. And also, bullets are great. There's the pleasurable mini waterproof vibrator. If you go to sex with emily.com goodvibes or just click on the Good Vibes banner at sex with me.com you can sort by, like, clitoral vibrators. Whatever. Anyway, you'll. You'll love them because I think that that's a fun thing to do with your partner, is using toys. So I actually got really anal. No pun intended. It is a pun because I didn't have anal sex. But I found, you know, I have so Many sex toys that I need to try out and we're going to be doing. Also subscribe to my YouTube channel because we're going to be doing a lot more sex toy reviews. I won't actually be them, but I'm going to be demonstrating how they actually work because you hear me talk about them all the time. But I want you to like see them so you can figure out what you like. But I figured out, you know those plastic shoe holders that you hang over your door and you can put a lot of shoes in them. I figured out that I could match each vibrator with their charger. And so now I've got like three of them hanging of like 60 vibrators. But I can always find which one I want like and I have it organized by clitoral G spot, you know, bondage toy. Like it's, it's.

Together. I know. Sometimes I just stay up till four in the morning organizing my sex toys because life is good. Okay, do we. Time for one more email or we should. We go on to the next?

We should go on to the next.

Okay, we're going to the next.

We're trying to get all the time.

Samantha, though, is that there is sort of a. Well, I'm not gonna say anything else, Samantha. I would just say talk to your partner. Communication is a lubrication and menace. So great to have you here and find menace on Instagram and Twitter. Menace.

Just menace. Yeah.

And I am sex with Emily on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. And thanks everyone for listening to the show. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com I'm Emily from sexwithemily.com Crazygirlproducts.com carries unique pheromone infused products that make you feel sexy and confident. I'm crazy about their wannabe naked shave cream. It's made perfectly for your more intimate areas. No shave bumps or ingrown hairs. Use coupon code EMILY25 for 25% off@crazygirlproducts.com there's one overlooked mineral behind better sleep, sharper focus, stronger muscles and a healthier heart. And at least half of us aren't getting enough. Most people don't realize they're running low on one of the most vital minerals for human magnesium. And here's the thing. No single form of magnesium can deliver all of its benefits. That's exactly why Qualia Magnesium plus was created with 10 highly bioavailable forms of magnesium plus over 70 essential minerals. It provides total magnesium support, helping you sleep better. Think clearer, move stronger and feel your best every day. And honestly, when you're less stressed and more energized, your intimacy and desire naturally benefit too. Sure, magnesium can help you sleep, but Qualia Magnesium plus goes beyond that. It's a whole body nourishment for how you think, move, connect and feel. More than just a sleep supplement, it's a foundation for daily well being which absolutely supports a healthier sex life. Getting enough magnesium from food alone is harder than ever due to depleted soils and chronic stress and our body's reduced ability to absorb it as we age. Well, Qualia's Magnesium plus formula is non gmo, vegan, gluten free and designed so all the ingredients work together for comprehensive magnesium support. And personally, I've been taking Qualia Magnesium plus in the evenings and I really noticed calmer nights and clear mornings and just feeling more grounded in my body, which always makes intimacy feel more accessible and enjoyable. It's become such an easy part of my nightly routine. Experience the most trusted magnesium for your purity, potency and performance. Go to qualialife.com sexwithemily for 50 off and here's a bonus use the code sexwithemily for an additional 15 off your order. That's q-u a l I a life.com sexwithemily thanks for qualia for sponsoring this episode.