SWE: Multiple Orgasms

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Hey, we're back here with Celeste and Danielle, sex and intimacy coaches offering cutting edge hands on sex training. So if you have any sex questions like that one thing that you're like, I can't quite get to the bottom of it, please call us tonight. 800-403-697. That's 800-403-697. It's been great hearing from you. We're getting some really good calls tonight so because we can, we can kind of talk about everything here because their courses I want to hear. So my next, you have a lot of interesting courses that you teach that I definitely want to get into. Make sure you guys list them and when they're coming up. But one of them is around becoming multi orgasmic. You have. And I'm wondering, it's for men and women, right? You've multi like you teach. Can men and women both learn, can any man or women learn to become multi orgasmic? Yes, yes.

We teach it in private sessions. We do not teach it in the class because, you know, it's very individual. And when we do hands on work with people so we really see how they, how they climax and how they work with the body and how they actually build erotic energy in the body. So we can help them be become multiorgasmic.

That's amazing. So you actually, they go in and you watch them arouse themselves and how they go through it. That's got to be hard to do that in front of someone. I mean, you guys are doctors or you're, you know.

You know, I think at first some people feel a little bit like nervous, but usually like after just having a few sessions with us, I mean, we're not going to do that in the first session, right?

You don't walk in, you're like, drop your pants. Right, exactly. There's a porn out.

You know, we help people feel really, really comfortable about themselves and in their bodies before we go into something like that. But you know, any man or woman can learn to do it.

A man too.

Absolutely. You know, there's two separate functions there that happen at the same time for most men. But when you separate them out, men can have a number of orgasms before they actually come.

Wow. Before they. Yeah, that's interesting. Okay, I didn't, I read that, but I.

So I also want to add that the power of witness, you know, like we are so shamed when we are pleasuring ourselves. There's so much shame in the culture around like self pleasuring. And just being witness doing this is so powerful. So powerful people. Just this segment of being watched is completely transformative.

Well, before we go on, can I say two things, please? One of them is that I'm so happy to be on Alice because it's my favorite radio station and I listen to it all the time. And the other thing is I really want to give a shout out to my sisters who have a movie in. It's Pride Week, you know, coming up and I'm really excited about it. And my sisters have a movie called Shafted. It's a short film and it's playing in the Frameline Film Festival.

Oh, it's great. It's a great film festival.

Yes. And Wednesday night, we're going to have a bi b cue a bisexual barbecue in Dolores park. And then we're going to march over and watch all of these films. And the film Shafted is in it.

Oh, congratulate her.

And it's about losing the sex toys in a lesbian divorce.

So it's very.

Very, very funny. So it runs in the family.

It's a great movie.

And so I'd love for people to do.

That's great. Congratulations. It's this Wednesday, you said?

Yeah, this Wednesday. And then also Sunday in Fun and Girl Shorts, which is another one of the showings.

Okay, got it.

Pride Week is so much fun, though.

I know.

I love Pride Week. It's a lot of fun, a lot of parties going on.

We've got to do something fun next week for Pride Week.

I always go to Bamboo Lounge.

Really?

And it's a good. It's a good time. Let's go crazy. Open bar. Let's go.

Let's do it. All right, we're down. It's Pride Week. Pride Weekend. What are you guys. What's everyone else doing for Pride Week in San Francisco? 800-403-697. We gotta do something fun. Okay. Let's talk to Sherry and Concord. Hi, Sherry.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm married and I have two kids. And it just seems a lot of people have been calling in and a lot of their problems, at least for me, sound like it stems from not being honest with their partners about what they want or, like, in bed.

Right.

Because some days, you know, I want really cuddly and I want my husband to be really gentle. And other days, I want to play it rough and role play. And, you know, it just. I don't know. For us, we just tell each other what we want and depending on the day.

Wow, that's amazing. How long have you been together?

We have been together since.

For four years now.

Okay.

So not real long, but I mean, since the beginning, three months after we started dating, we just have been very honest and open with what we like. Even when it comes to, like, sex isn't always.

I guess there's a lot of different ways for us that it's sexual, but not necessarily.

You know, the average sex, I guess.

Right.

Good for you.

Yeah. You average. Yeah. So you definitely do role playing, you said?

Yeah, I do role playing. And sometimes, you know, if things just aren't feeling right for me, we'll talk about it. Sometimes just talking about sexual Things can be a good sexual experience for the night. Like we might tell each other the naughty things you want to do to each other.

Right. But you won't even actually have sex, but you'll just talk about it. You guys are perfect couples.

Sounds like you have an amazing. And I mean, I think the biggest piece of it. Oh, go ahead.

For us, like we read this Kama Sutra book and we read a whole bunch of other books about sex and stuff because we're very sexual people. And the biggest thing that we read is that tell people what you like. You have to know what you like.

First and then you have to tell your partner exactly. Wow.

And sher, you just touching the most important thing around sexuality. And this is communication. When you start communicating what you need and what you want and what turns you on, that's what allows the development of the sexual relationship. People kind of like expect, you know, that their partner is going to read their mind. And if they really love me, they would do know exactly what I want. And that's not happening. So that's a wonderful example that you're giving.

Well, and my friend says, well, I can't. I can't tell if he wants to be with me or not. And I was like, well, stop looking at him with kitten eyes across the room and tell him, will you want me or not? If you want sex, ask him if he wants you. If he doesn't, he'll say no, right?

No. You sound like a good, good person for her to talk to. Really, this is like the healthiest sex call.

It's like. And you have such a well rounded sex life.

I don't know.

For me, it's not something to be embarrassed about for a while. My husband was because he was raised Catholic, but there you go.

We were all raised Jewish, so we're comfortable talking about sex.

But no, that's it. So you kind of brought this out in your husband.

Well, because I'm a very sexual person and it's not something I feel like I ever need to hide or I need to make into something else.

Right.

And so, you know, I just would always ask, well, what do you want? What are you in the mood for? And this is what I really want.

Good for you. How do you think you got that way?

Probably because I have five older siblings who are all very sexual.

Okay.

And they're very open about it.

That's great, Sherry. I'm proud of you. My hats go off you. Thanks, Sherry. Thanks for calling. Keep having good sex for everyone. That's great.

I definitely Will.

Okay, good. Sounds like it. I think that's interesting when Sherry says, like, I'm a very sexual person. I mean, do you think that most people could learn to say that even if they're not right now? They could kind of learn to be like, I'm a sexual person after they take one of your. You know.

Definitely.

It's not something you're born with, per se. Like, you could become more sexual. Like, there's some.

I think actually it is something that everyone is born.

I mean, you're born.

You don't feel taken away. Well, no, I mean, I think actually people are very, very sexual when they're born. And then it's sort of like our culture says, no, you can't be, and pushes us away from it. Pushes us away from it. And then we can rediscover that part of ourselves. And so, you know, we help people rediscover. And yes, every person could say that sentence, I'm a very sexual person. But, you know, sometimes it takes a lot of work of uncovering what the culture has taught you you're supposed to do and not do.

That's a lot of what your courses do, too, right? You kind of like, okay, let's get it all out now. Like, what did you learn? What are these things that you tell yourself?

And especially in individual sessions, too, you know, we really go deep in those sessions and look back at their family experiences and their life experiences, because you get a lot of lessons in your life about who you're supposed to be sexually. And so to untake away the supposed to and find the. I want to and, like, really listen to, you know, your body and what it's saying. That's how we teach.

This is what you guys do on your one on one?

Yes.

Celesteanddanielle.com that's where they can find you.

Yes.

Right. Okay. Let's talk to Candace in Fremont. Hi, Candace.

So I had just been listening and could really relate to one of the earlier callers that was saying that she felt really disconnected to her different sexual partners. Because I had been like that in the past.

So much so that I would only be attracted to somebody if I knew that I wouldn't, like, want to spend time with them.

Okay.

I don't know if that sounds weird.

No, I've heard that before.

Yeah, we're like, I know. Like, I would be attracted to them because I know I would never want to have lunch with them or anything. It would be sexual. And then I know emotionally that I could be totally disconnected.

Right.

And Actually, the. My most recent relationship, I've been really into that person, and the sex is. Has been to a whole other level where I feel like, oh, maybe it's that whole brain thing or something where it's emotional, but I've never had sex like this before. Like, it's incredible.

But I feel like where I'm at now. And my question for you is that we've been together for about a year and a half, and I've kind of been reverting into picturing different people while we're having sex. Not anybody I've ever been with, but I feel like maybe I'm reverting to something that's not healthy. And I just didn't know if that categorizes some type of fantasy or if that's something that maybe I'm concerned about.

It's a great question, Candice.

Thank you so much, Candice. I think it's wonderful. And there's not enough that's being said about fantasies and how people kind of use them in order to go over the, you know, like, overboard and have climax. And.

We need fantasies, and fantasies are wonderful. And we can still be very connected with our partners and still have fantasies. So there's nothing wrong with you. Let's start there. You're completely healthy.

That's good to hear.

I mean, I haven't told my partner that I've thought about that. But, I mean, it's just. It's interesting because it is. I think, in that realm of fetusy, it's not like I actually want to be with anybody else. I just. There's just something, like, erotic about it, I guess. I don't know.

And it's so fun sometimes you can talk to your partner about it and you can actually bring fantasies of other people into your experience, you know, where you sort of say even out loud what's going on through your minds with each other and share that. And it, like, adds a whole different dimension. So, you know, but you can decide, is it something you want to share or not? That's up to you. But, you know, it's only unhealthy if you're thinking, I don't really want to be with my partner. I'm not that intimate, and I'd actually like to be somewhere else. I.

But.

But, you know, if you're feeling great about your connection and you're having some fantasies while you're having sex, that's wonderful.

It is that a lot of men do that too, right here. That men do that a lot.

Yes.

More Men do it than women. But many, many women do it too.

Exactly. They do.

And seriously, sometimes that's the only thing that someone needs just to go over the edge. Just a little bit of fantasy.

Yeah, exactly. Candice, sounds like you're right on cue here.

Well, thank you for the feedback.

Sure. Keep having a good time. Bye, Candice. Thank you. Yeah, you don't hear a lot about that. Women are always concerned. Are you thinking about another woman while I'm having. You're having sex with me. But I guess you don't hear that often that women are doing that, although they are. Of course they are. But I appreciate Candida's call. So what would you, Celeste and Danielle say that.

Like what are the most kind of. This is the basic but the common couple that come to see you. How would you describe your typical couple that comes in and what their issue is if you had to?

Yes, usually.

We get couples that have different desires in terms of one person want to have more sex and the other person wants to have less sex.

And another typical couple would be some couples that are in long term relationship and just stopped having sex. So that would be like the two main.

So that's the two.

Yeah. Okay. And so let's talk about the second one. Just because that is just the number one thing that get asked. So just if we get into that specifically the couple, long term couple, they were having great sex, say at the beginning, let's just say for sake here. And they're not anymore because they had kids or because something else happened and they're concerned because they're like, am I ever going to get it back? And so do you see them one on one or maybe you take one of your courses? What would you suggest for a couple like this? What would happen on the first day?

So usually we see the couple together and then we see them individually to see, you know, like people have different stories when we see them individually and we definitely work with them on, you know, like first thing is, you know, like the beginning of relationship. Everyone want to have sex. People are excited, the hormones are supports, the desire to have sex constantly. You know, women are not cyclical. It's like really exciting. But over time kids get in the picture. Even if kids don't get in the picture actually.

Right.

You know, people get wrapped up with their own lives and careers and kids and whatever is coming and they forget to invest in sex.

They forget just like life goes by, life goes by like, oh look, we haven't had sex yet.

Yes, that's usually, usually the Main problem, they forget to invest in sex and they forget to keep seducing each other. They forget to communicate around what they want about the fantasy. And they keep doing the same thing they did in the beginning, and that is boring, you know, like, what kind.

Of same things in the beginning? For example?

Like whatever, you know, like, people get into routines, right? No, they keep sex for late at night. They forget, you know, to seduce each other. They expect that, you know, they're gonna. They're gonna be turned on immediately just by someone like, you know, like, hey, do you want to have sex? That's not a seduction line. Or are you horny?

That's not a seduction line.

Right, so.

Or I'm horny. Let's do it.

Oh, that's the worst seduction.

That is the worst.

Takes away.

So let's get into seduction then. Because we talk a lot about. I mean, you can't do all this other stuff. We need the seduction. So what are some seduction techniques that come up or that you would teach in this situation that we can talk about?

Yeah, I think we talk. You know, we teach men how. Well, we teach men how to seduce women a lot, and it's a lot. Like, ways to seduce men.

Yeah, I'm thinking, like, you guys are going to talk about, oh, lighting candles.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

All that kind of hoarding stuff.

I mean. Okay, here's the truth of the matter. For some people, they really need to relax and have a transition. I mean, women kind of like, we're multitasking all the time, and we've got 10 million things on our mind, and we're like, oh, what am I? You know, I need to do this and that and the other thing. And we sort of. It's really hard for us to focus in on one thing. And so sometimes we need a break. That's why sex happens a lot on vacation. And so if you can create a situation that feels like a vacation, like you are out of the mood moment, you know, like out, you know, even in your house. And that's why the candles and the bathtub and the wine, you know, like a bottle of champagne or something, that's why what that does is sort of says, okay, we're transitioning. But that isn't the only way to do it. And women don't only want, like, soft music and romance, you know, they want to be thrown up against the wall and, you know, said, oh, my God, you're the most gorgeous woman that I've ever seen. Or, you know, much dirtier things than that. That I couldn't even say on the radio.

Exactly.

And we teach men how to throw women up against the wall and they have to practice.

Yes. You teach men how to throw women against the wall. Men don't do that enough.

In a.

Loving, gentle, passionate way.

Men do not do that enough.

And we teach women to surrender to this because what we see a lot is women that are so tense that they might end up having sex. Because, you know, like many women don't get the sex that they want.

Right?

Unfortunately.

Well, I find a lot that women like to be dominated. Oh yeah, like that. They love it.

Definitely. Women love to be dominated. But many times women don't get high quality sex. And foreplay is like, okay, two kisses here, two kisses there, I'm done.

Exactly.

Yes. And some men really confuse dominance with being mean. And those are two very, very different things. Like you can be so gentle and so seductive and so intense and so passionate and you can be really good technically and still be very dominant. You know, you can say do this right now or don't look at me or you know, just something that like sort of like gets some presses somebody's button. You need to find out what those button, you need to talk about them. But it doesn't have to be mean. People get very confused about that.

Okay, so these are some. I can't believe you teach men how to throw a woman against the wall in a loving way. They're like, oh yeah, of course. It's like 101. So that's in Danielle 101.

Against the wall.

And what's amazing is that men actually learn. We not only teach them how to throw women against the wall, we actually teach them how to do it from a place of power and bring the desire to the picture. Because just like doing the technique is not enough.

So how do you do that? Then the second part.

Feedback. Feedback. You know, there's some things that are experiential that you can't talk about and you need to experience that. That's the difference in our coaching.

But and it is really getting men connected with their own desire. Because men become very disconnected from their desire, especially if they are nice guys, because they think it's bad to really, really want a woman. And it's like that's what women want more than anything in the world. They might not want it from the construction worker in their building, but they definitely want it from their partner.

You know, and so men think that women don't and then they don't do it. Or the men think they get mixed messages that they're afraid they're going to get rejected.

They're terrified of rejection. You know, I have this new, like, thing that I'm on right now. It's like practice getting rejected, you know, like, just go up to people and talk to them, you know, ask them out. I'm practicing. I'm practicing being rejected these days. Like, yes, absolutely, because, you know, you want it. You want to. Like, it's like. It's like a tally mark. It's like, okay, that means I did it. That means I tried. Like, that is a success in and of itself, you know? And yes, if you're the one, like, if. If you're a man, you're the one who's always going to have to be doing the, you know, the first move, then you have to get rejected. You have to learn how to do that. It's going to happen, you know, so. But I. But I was feeling bad that I was saying that and not trying it myself. So I'm going to go out. Are you trying to pick up women? I'm not saying if I'm single or.

Double, but, you know, you don't have to say it.

Just go out and do it. I like it.

I want to add, you know, the approach is many times it's, you know, like, men and women are equal. They are equal. They're equal in so many ways. We're very equal at work. We're doing the same things, hopefully, you know, like, we have career opportunities that are the same. But when it comes to the bedroom, women want to be taken. Women want to be taken care of. Women want to be approached. Women want to be seduced. So there's no. If there's no erotic charge. It's boring, right?

Exactly. So how do you tell them? So they seduce them, they throw them against the wall. What are some other things? The seduction phase. Is it hard to talk about? Because you have to show it.

Yeah. Okay. I would love to throw you, I guess.

Okay, we would.

It's only radio, you know, I just.

Do not get thrown against the wall enough. I have to say, I like that. I can remember the times I've been thrown against the wall, like, very clearly, and it has not happened in a while.

It's hot. But I think the guy doesn't know when it's the right time to do that.

It's just to now.

Tonight, it's now. It's now, you know, and it's like when she's walking up to, like, be like, hi, how are you? With, like, A little peck on the cheek and then you just grab her, you know?

Yes. We actually have three workshops for men because, you know, there's a lot to learn.

What are the other workshops for men that you guys have?

So the level one is, you know, 101, how to throw her against the wall.

Okay, that's more level two, actually.

Level two, because in level two, we teach men about passion, bringing passion to sexual relationship. We teach about toys, we teach about female ejaculation. And we.

And we teach men how to throw women against the wall. And the level three, we teach men how to dominate, how to be dominant, how to bring this dominance, and how.

To do role play and really get into women's fantasies and understand them and ask her, sort of like elicit them from her in a way where she feels really accepted and comfortable to talk about what she wants. Because, you know, every woman has a different fantasy about that.

You must have seen so many amazing stories. And from couples just who went from like nothing to this amazing, like having.

The transformation is profound. You know, when we do those exercises with couples and we do it in individual coaching too, not only in classes, you see a man that is like, you know, kind of like the posture is kind of like, you know, like low and, you know, not, not confident. He just like becomes taller and, you know, like high and confident and it happens in a second.

Really?

Yes. It's profound. The transformation is profound.

That is unbelievable. How about the hands on part now in your classes? How does that incorporate like, let's say a man's class? How do the women. How are the women models involved in that?

Yeah, well, we have both men's and women's classes with hands on. And so basically in the men's workshop, the women come in and the men get to practice all over body touch. Now, the men stay clothed and they wear gloves for certain parts of the touch. But they do get amazing feedback on what women want. And I'm telling you, it's not just the men who appreciate this. We have wives and girlfriends emailing us, sending us flowers to one workshop. Remember this one time, like my man, suddenly he looks at me in a way that he's never looked at me before before. It's like he has eight hands. He's touching my body in a different way. You know, it changes their sex life.

It's amazing. Everyone should take your courses.

Thank you. And in the women's workshop, we have men, male models. And so they can learn how to be better lovers to men too.

Do you want to? He's volunteering a model.

We would love to have you.

Can I rewind and go all the way back to square one? Because you're already talking about people that are already there and they're already having sex and. And stuff like that. Do you. Have you in this course, have you found maybe the best opener of meeting somebody? I think that's the biggest fear for guys. You know, when we go back to rejection. The best opener, like in a bar or in a club or just the best way to approach the best opener.

Is to be confident, not to fake it.

Yeah, but what do you say after that you can, you know, stand up straight and all that?

I'll tell you what. The best opener situation say just about anything. They have done research on this. So it turns out that if you just get connected with yourself and are really, really sort of like, comfortable in your body, you know, we teach people to take some deep breaths before they make the approach and to really find out who they are as a man, you know, not like, who should I be or who should I model myself after? Because that's just faking it. And eventually she's going to find out you're not that guy. So you might as well be the most powerful, confident version of yourself. And then whatever comes out of your mouth at that moment, that's the thing that you're supposed to say. So it's not, you know, there is no. If you're using canned, like, hey, what's up? You know, you're gonna sound canned. But if you're really connected with yourself, you're gonna know what to say. You're gonna be in the zone, and you're gonna be able to pick up women successfully.

Yeah, it does.

Because what do you do now? Me? You don't do anything.

I don't do anything. I've never asked a woman to dance in a nightclub ever. Yeah, I'm just saying I still, you know, I still approach women. But, yeah, I don't know. It's in a weird way.

What about working with. Okay. The woman's brain, they always say, is that she's the largest sex organ. I mean, what does that mean exactly? The woman's brain? Like, how do men have to get into her brain?

Well, I think it has a lot to do with emotions. And this is why in our men's workshop, we don't just teach technique because women go to sex for an emotional experience. That doesn't mean they want intimacy necessarily, or to live happily ever after or to, you know, like. But we do want to Feel something. And so if you can get a woman into a place where she's really feeling something, just, you know, some kind of intensity, some kind of like, oh, he's taking me someplace that I've never been before. That's what turns women on. And so that, you know, those are the places that we teach men to take women. Emotional experience and also to deal with women around their emotions, which men get very, very overwhelmed by. We have, like, a patented method that works.

Do you.

Oh, yeah. Level One.

Level one.

We teach it in Level one.

It's a patent method how men can do with all their emotions.

If you don't handle women's emotions, she'll never trust you to. She'll never trust you to really open up and be completely wild and sexual.

Can I just get a list of the men who've taken your course?

No, we're gonna have.

I mean, seriously, you know, people can buy lists for certain things. Like political candidates buy lists and people are gonna vote. Like, I would just like to buy the list of the men who you think would be good for. You've gone through your course. That would make me really happy and then not mess around. I like all the emotional connection stuff. That's really good. So, okay, what are your upcoming stuff that people can take your classes?

So we have the Men's Become an Extraordinary lover workshop on July 26th.

Okay.

And we have the workshop for Women Unleash youh Magnetism, Drive youe men wild on September 12th. And we have a couples workshop on October 25th.

Getting ready for Halloween. Because, you know, it's the fantasy workshop.

That is the fantasy one. And then up until that point, people can just see you as individual counselors. Like, you always have Open to therapy counseling. And it's celesteanddanielle.com. okay. Any parting words that we need to know? I mean, anything new since I last talked to you, New techniques that you're developing that we haven't covered yet?

Well, I definitely want to say check, you know, sign up on our Facebook page, because we're on Facebook like everyone else on the planet. And.

I mean, I think we're coming up on with new techniques and new ideas all the time.

You know, I've been really impressed by the stuff that you guys have done.

We have a newsletter that, you know, people can sign up for on our website every month. We send out a sexy trick, you know, like, how to be, you know, be an animal or, you know, like, we just. And we also talk about sexperiences that you have in The Bay Area. And so it's a great. It's a great way to kind of get updates on what's going on and.

Okay. Celesteandanielle.com. yes, that's easy. You can find it on my website as well. Sexwithemily.com thank you so much for joining me tonight. You're gonna have to come back. There's always so talk about.

Thank you.

It's so fun.

Thank you.

We'll be right back with top 10 sex tips you've never heard. And you're gonna want to hear them here. Okay? We'll be right back. Hey, everyone.

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Hey, we're back. I love Celeste and Danielle. They're so fun. They're awesome, aren't they? I think we should take some of their courses.

I mean, let me watch them first.

You want to watch their courses first?

Watch the courses, and then maybe I'll take one.

I think their courses are awesome.

I'm just. I'm just shy. Other people can jump right in.

You're shy, aren't you?

I'm totally shy.

Oh, that's so cute. Okay, so that was really, really interesting. I have so many. They're workshops. Okay, so we're going to talk about. This is the 20 favorite sex tips ever. I broke it down into 10. These are like going through all these Sex tips of, like, what? Everyone's. I found this list and it's like, here's the top, and I picked out 10 of them. And feel free to join me with your favorite sex tips if you have anything at all that you're like, you know what, Em? This is what worked for me, and I want to share it with you. Like something that you never would have thought or something that always worked for me. And menace. You can also pipe in with your sex tips, too.

I'd love to.

Okay. Okay, we've got the first one. It's called the Randy Rub. A dub dub. Before you make love, take a bath together. Prepare the bathroom beautifully beforehand with fluffy towels and candles. Then put two drops of patchouli oil, three drops of sandalwood, and three drops of lavender oil into your bath water. Patchouli and sandalwood are 2 cents at Aromatherapist. This tip's from 1987. They believe Awaken sensuality if you're not down with patchouli.

Is a guy supposed to do this or a woman?

Well, they do it together. The combination of scents and warm water sensations will completely prime your bodies and minds for truly sensual and erotic experience. Lavender, sandalwood, and patchouli oil. I don't like the smell of patchouli. I don't know.

Is it me? Am I just, like, uptight? Uptight? Do I just think that kind of stuff is just corny?

Yeah. I mean, I can see what you're saying, why it's corny. But if people, like, everyone here is complaining about sex, that's why we have the show, that it's like, it seems so silly, I think, to go through the threshold of like, oh, we're gonna take a sexy bath. But sometimes that's kind of what you need to do. I mean, it is kind of corny.

Yeah. But I just feel. I don't know, sometimes.

Yeah.

Like the stuff with the candles. I mean, girls, I assume they like that, but sometimes there's. I think it's a little corny.

Yeah, I know.

Cornballish.

Baths are nice together, though. Have you ever taken a bath to someone?

Not a bath, but I'm a big fan of showers. Remember I was telling you that story in the shower?

Yeah, I was.

You were down at Coachella. We didn't run each other.

I know, which is sad.

Coachella is a big music festival in Palm Springs or Indio, and I was having sex with this girl in the shower, and. And she, you know, it's really hot down there. It's like, oh, it's like.

It's not 100 degrees.

100 plus degrees. And I take really hot showers. The girl, like, passed out. I thought she died. She just passed out and just fell right there.

Was it from your sexy lovemaking?

Probably. You know, because I'm very good. But how? I mean, I literally. I thought she was dead.

Oh, my God.

I'm a big fan of the showers, though.

No, showers are good. Showers are. Anything watery?

Yeah. Hot tub, but I don't know about that.

Was she okay?

Yeah, she was fine. She came, too. Yeah.

Okay. She came, too. Thank God we don't.

I would have to bury her in the desert.

What'd you say?

I would have had to bury her in the desert.

God, thank God. I'm glad you're all back. Okay. Okay, here's one the Unhand your man.

Give your man a massage without using your hands. Before you begin, slowly undress your partner, but make sure that he stays warm. If the room isn't toasty enough, cover him with towels or sheets. Then, keeping your hands at your side or behind your back, stroke his body with your face, hair and.

Breasts. Once he's totally relaxed, you can rub these body parts all over his body and he'll be happy to rise to the occasion. So they're saying don't go right for the main event. Just slowly massage your partner all over, not using your hands, but using other body parts.

Yeah, but just don't take too long.

It's called arousal. It's like, turn. It's like desire.

Yeah, but you ladies talk about how it's so fun to tease him and stuff like that. It's not fun.

Some guys really, really love that.

Menace to be teased.

Yes, menace.

I swear to God, there's a point where it's just too long.

Well, what is too long?

Three minutes?

No, we're not talking here like an hour, but we're saying even 10 minutes is 10 minutes longer than usual. Yeah, I think men like the tease.

10 minutes is a long time.

Yeah, men like the tease. What, are you gonna set your stopwatch or something?

Okay, I'm gonna put a buzzer, one of those little clocks that you know. All right, done.

Listen to it.

What are we gonna do with you? Okay, number four is the heavenly heartbeat. To feel more connected in bed, tune into each other's heart rate, lay your hand on his chest and have him do the same. You might be surprised how easily you can become synchronized since heart rate speeds up during orgasm. If you stay hand to heart connected when you do it, you'll feel how wild. You're driving each other crazy. It's a lot about your breath and your heart rate and stuff during sex. Did you know that? That you can be, like, synchronized together?

Yeah. Has a man ever check their heartbeat?

No, but maybe.

Well, women do that, right? They always, like, check a man's, like, heartbeat and how, you know, how fast his.

I don't do that.

You don't do that.

Check his heartbeat.

When?

Just, like, you know, during or after.

Or, like, when you're lying on a guy's chest, you can hear his heartbeat. I love that. I love lying on a man's chest.

Women love doing that.

Lying on a man's chest is the best thing in the world.

Women are really into that.

You're not into it.

I found you're awesome.

You get hot and you want to roll over. I love cuddling and, like.

But I just wanted to see if a man ever did this.

Man never checked out my heart rate.

No, they should.

They should.

Okay, I haven't done it, but I'll do it since you mentioned it tonight.

Okay, you will. With your next lover.

Yes.

Okay.

Marcellina wants to know if you checked after she fell out of the shower. Did you check her heartbeat?

Oh, the girl that passed out in the shower? Yeah. Well, like, it was weird because her eyes, like, rolled back in her head and stuff like that.

That's not good.

Scared the hell out of me.

I'm glad she's okay. Mana. Okay, so the next one is putting on the Ritz. You know how hotel sex is always extra hot? Try recreating that away from home atmosphere in your own bedroom. First, purge your room of any family photo or office equipment. Then buy sheets with the highest thread count per inch count you can find. Look for 200 and above, which feels super silky to the touch without the cheesiness of satin. No satin sheets, men. You don't have satin sheets, do you?

No way.

Invest in some thick, fluffy robes to lounge around it. And for the ultimate hotel style indulgence, set up a tray of champagne and finger foods to savor. After you make love, you'll both feel like you're on incredible vacation for the rest of the world. What do you think about that?

I totally agree with all that. I think men. I have to give advice to men, and you probably agree with me. Invest in your beds. Yes, invest in your bed.

So glad you said that.

As nice as possible.

We were totally talking about this the other night that, like, guys, like my friend was talking about the first time she went to her now husband's bed. It was like shake. It smelled like sweat. He had just. You could tell the sheets were like from college and ripped and just. You got guys gotta have nice beds.

Invest. It's like best thing. Like women love it.

They do. It says a lot about a guy too. Yeah, I think he's good sheets. Go to, you know, his great sheets. Overstock.com. yeah, I'm just gonna plug them. They've got amazing sheets. Like 500, 600 thread count, super cheap. You can get some sheets. It doesn't cost that much money. Like 60 bucks. Get a new comforter. Madness. You've good sheets.

Oh, I got, Yeah, I have a beautiful bed. I have a Simmons beauty rest pillow. Top all that. It is the best thing ever.

And you got nice sheets.

Yeah.

What color?

They're brown. They're light tan. Maybe that's good for you.

Menace all grown up.

And then with the hotels, I love, love W Hotel.

Me too. I love the W hotel comforter because.

They have the best. They have the best beds ever.

I have a friend who just bought a bed from them straight, direct. Was like, I want one of your beds and bought the whole thing. They have the best beds.

Yeah, they have one. There's a Debbie Hotel in Newark. Surprisingly, yeah. Right here in the Bay area. And I could just live there. I've probably been there so many times.

I love it. They have like the great down comforters and. Absolutely. Men and your beds, you gotta just. If you're looking at your like 6. Because men also don't realize they have like scratchy old sheets.

Yeah.

That is such a turn off. Okay, so you got to do that. People get new sheets. Okay, here's the next one. I don't know how you're going to follow this one. These are sex tips. These are the 20 best sex tips ever. I'm reading my 10 favorite out of this list. If you have any sex tips to share with me at all that you're like, wow, this really worked for me, or this is important or it didn't work. 800-400-3697.

Yes, that is where we are. Okay, let go loudly. When you're sexually excited, really express yourself. Let yourself go in whatever way feels most comfortable. Scream your head off. Laugh, shout his name, whatever you have to do. If you're embarrassed, just know that you're doing your partner a favor. The more you express your pleasure, the more you make him feel like the stud of the universe. Bonus, your orgasms will be even more powerful if you really let her rip vocally. What do you think about that loud screaming woman?

I think it's good. Me, personally, I can't because I have roommates. That's the bummer.

I have close neighbors. I have close neighbors.

Yeah.

So it's usually me saying, shut up or keep it down or be quiet.

Hopefully not shut up. Maybe just shh.

Yeah, shh.

No, that's the problem about living in the city is that my neighbors, I share a wall with them. Yeah. I know they hear me having sex.

I know. I swear somebody's banged on the wall before.

I know that they're like, sex with Emily, she's having sex. Like, it's just. I know that they know that I do, and I know they hear me having sex sometimes.

That's why you go to a hotel.

Right.

But they're saying here that you can recreate the whole experience in your own room. But you're right.

I always am.

Like, and then the next day, you're both going to work. I'm like, hi. Hi. And they're like, they know I had sex last night and stuff. But. But. But let's just say you don't have the roommate. When you're not an urban dweller with a roommate or with a. Sharing a wall with somebody, it is good to, like, just let go vocally. Be as loud as you want to. Okay, here's another one. I like eyes wide open. Don't close your eyes during sex. This is a great way to explore more of the emotional side of intercourse. Start by kissing with your eyes open and looking at each other during foreplay. Gradually build up until you can sustain eye contact throughout both of your climaxes. You'll experience your orgasm in a different way. It's a revelation with your eyes, like, staring each other in the eyes. What do you think about that? I like it. I like eyes open sometimes. Not the whole time, but sometimes. When you make eye contact with a guy, it's really hot.

Yeah. But sometimes women make scary faces. Like, it's scary.

What do you mean?

I don't know.

Well, just the entire episode. It. When they're looking at you, sometimes it's scary.

Scary how? I don't know.

They just, like, make it look like.

Serial killers or something.

Yeah, like a scary face. Like they're looking into your soul or something. It's weird.

I think you have intimacy issues.

No, I'm just saying. I'm not saying every single woman, but sometimes it's scary.

Mm.

Sometimes they're looking at you really weird.

Sometimes you guys Are scary too. Looking at you. Weird. They're just looking at you. They look scary.

They look scary. I'm sorry, they do. They do.

Okay, well here's another one.

You never had a guy look at you. He's looking at you and it looks scary. A little scary.

Well, maybe like at the end when he's, you know, getting there. When he gets there. But I think it's hot. I don't think it's scary. I just think it's like he's totally letting go and letting go. And I think that's hot.

All right.

When a man totally lets go. But I don't think it's scary per se. Men is like you do. I'm not afraid. Okay, another one. The kiss connection. Share a passionate 10 second kiss every single day. A lot of couples keep having sex but stop really kissing. That is so true. And that's a shame because such a wonderful intimate act. So just go up and lay one on them. Instantly you feel passionate instead of platonic. What a rush. I love the kissing. And I love kissing during sex.

Yeah, kissing is awesome. Kissing, I'll agree.

And kissing is a lot. Like a lot of couples. Yeah, have sex but stop kissing. And kissing is so erotic.

Do you like kissing in public?

Not like majorly making out, but I will.

Do you kiss people in nightclubs?

Never. No.

It's called cupcaking.

Why is it cupcaking?

I don't know. That's what people call it, cupcaking.

Like when you're drunk and you meet.

Someone and you're like, you're like making out with them in a club and stuff. Kissing's so awesome though.

Kissing is awesome. Kissing is underrated. I don't think that. I think that people stop kissing after a while.

I was at a party last night and there was like these two guys, like full on just making out at the club. It was pretty funny really.

Like, I mean, I think that if you're with someone you care, but I don't know, I guess I would. When I think of people making out at a club, it's usually someone who just met drunk and they're sloppy making up. But I have no. If I'm with someone, like with the guy I'm dating, I would, I guess I'd make out with them.

Yeah. And when you're going, okay, so how long should I mean, it all goes back to foreplay. How long do you think? What's the time limit? How long do you have to be making out or kissing before, you know, you get to, to What? To the action?

It depends. I think you can still. I guess that. I guess you could still keep kissing while you're at the action. That's the thing. It's like doing the action but kissing at the same time. Like making love but still kissing. Not the whole time, but going in and out of kissing.

Yeah.

But just to ask how long you should be kissing before you actually do something is just. That's arbitrary. That. That's arbitrary. Arbitrary. Arbitrary. That's hard to say.

It's getting late. I understand.

It's getting. Well, it's hard to say. And it's hard to say. It's hard to say arbitrary. Arbitrarily speaking, it's hard to say. And it's hard to say what is the right amount of time to be kissing. I think you just kind of know. As long as you are still kissing. Kissing is so important.

I have something here too. Later we can get to the 10.

Things we learned through a kiss. Okay, so these are the top 20 sex tips. There's 10 of them that I picked out that I really think are the top, top, top. If you have any sex tips you want to share with us, that's like, you know what, Em? Here's one sex tip that always worked for me or what I've learned. Call me. 800-403-697. Don't go to bed yet. We're on till midnight. So, you know, everyone's got to work tomorrow. You know what? I love that I don't have the Sunday night like blues anymore. Like I used to going to work the next day because I love doing the show. I'm all riled up on Sunday nights. Yeah, I'm excited. I love it. Okay, the sultry slo mo. Here's the next sex tip to surprise them and build anticipation. Try doing the same things you always do in the bedroom, but slow down to one fourth of your normal speed. You and your guy will have time to really bond. And since you're feeling and since you'll be feeling sensation over a longer period of time, both of your climaxes will likely be out of this world. Slow it down. What do you think about that? I like it.

Yeah, I like slowing down, but I don't know. Women just love you like running a marathon man.

See, I think that women like it slow.

Really?

Yeah, I think they do. I think that sex gets. You get into a routine of being fast. And I think that the slowness can be so, so nice. It can be like so much more intimate and intense when you slow things down. I really like this tip. Like, everything slow down. Like, the kissing. Slow down. And the touching and the rate to which you undress each other. Slow it all down. It's hot.

Yeah, I mean, I totally encourage that because guys run out of energy quickly.

They do. They sweat. They get all hot and riled up.

Yeah. And then they're ready to go to bed right after.

Not all men, but a lot of men fall asleep after sex, but we understand why. Their oxytocin levels dive and they are tired. It's just hormonal and physiological.

Yeah. Well, I think you need to tell that to more women, because sometimes.

But some men don't fall asleep after sex. But some guys are like, I'm like, one more thing. Wait. And that's sleeping. Okay. The next sex tip is don't wait to exhale. You can actually use your breath to control your orgasm. With each exhalation, imagine that you're pushing the satisfying sensations throughout your body instead of just letting them build up below the waist. When you finally let go, you'll feel it from head to toe. You'll feel the whole climax from head to toe. They're saying if you use your breath, a lot of climaxing is tied to your breath. A lot of really good.

Experiences. Like that is when you synchronize your breath with your partner or even with yourself. You slow down your breath and you pay attention to your breath. See, you probably don't have issues with it. You always have the orgasm. But with women, sometimes it's a little more.

I think a lot of guys hold their breath.

They do, yeah.

They're holding breath in, like, cut off oxygen.

I think they do.

Yeah.

Why do you think that is?

Do you feel like you don't know what to do? You know, they think that's what they're supposed to do. Or, I mean, they're focusing too much on what they're doing and they're forgetting to breathe.

Exactly. I think I do that, too. I think women do that. We always. I think that we, a lot of times forget to breathe because it feels good. And then you get like.

Yeah.

Up here in your throat. And you have to, like, you get. You know, when your breath gets up here and, like, it's above your. And you have to just breathe all through your body. And they say that that's like the number one thing. Like I said, women have a hard time climaxing. If you focus on your breath, that it can really help.

Yeah. Maybe they should get in scuba gear with air.

Sure. Whatever you Want? Hey, that goes to the next one. Strut your stuff. The next time you go out with your man, wear your sexiest outfit. Go ahead, flirt with strangers and turn some heads. Tease. It's easy to forget you're still attractive to other members of the opposite of sex when you're in a committed relationship. But sometimes you have to remind your guy that you're a prize, not an appendage. It really turns most guys on to know they have someone other men want to be with. And it can be a tremendous ego boost for you too. When you feel sexy, you are sexy. Once you return home from your diva date, you won't be able to keep your hands off each other. How would you feel about that?

It's true. I don't know. There's some things like you're dating a girl and she's. She's really hot, but she talks to everybody that talks to her. You know what I'm saying? It's kind of a turn off, you know, when you go out and you know, there she's like kind of that flirty. She's flirty with everybody because, you know she's hot and everybody wants to talk to her. But it's more of a turn on if. If she's like focusing on me, you know, and then she, you know, gives kind of the other people like one word answers.

That is right.

I think that's totally.

I guess they're saying if things in your relationship have gotten kind of stale.

Yeah.

You go out and she's sexy and flirty and you see her in that realm and you're sexy and flirty, then. I mean, then she sexy that you're gonna want her and desire it more. That you're just kind of doing this outside thing.

Yeah, I don't really.

You're not down with that?

I'm not down with that because I want to know that she's there for me.

Yeah, I mean, I guess she is there for you, but this is a way to spice it up so she feels sexy that other men desire her and that you still desire her. But I see what you're saying. Okay, we have another one.

We have the grab and go. If you're turned on at an inopportune time, act on your feelings. Although it feels a bit naughty. A quickie will help you stay faithful. People often have few. A affair is solely for the illicit rush from doing something bad. Quickies allow you to experience all of the having an affair thrill with none of the cheating.

So you have a quickie and You.

Yeah, it builds a rush because you're so used to just kind of, like, got to make time for it, and you just, like, have this quickie.

It's kind of like probably what they were talking about earlier with our guests, where you kind of just grab her and.

What do you think about that? Throwing up women against the wall?

Oh, no, I think it's awesome. I think that's. They love it.

I love Celeste and Danielle.

Yeah, I think women do love that. Yeah, they love.

I think that's the best thing is, you know, dominance, being dominant, you know.

And you feel comfortable being dominant with a woman.

Yeah. Because I think that's what they like.

Okay. I think you're right. I think you're absolutely, absolutely, absolutely right. Okay.

We have one more. All right. Okay. You ready?

I'm ready for it.

You ready for it? Okay.

Finger food foreplay. Have a romantic dinner without utensils so you can feed each other. There's something sensual about placing food in your partner's mouth. It's such fun, especially when you serve stuff that's not supposed to be eaten with your hands, like salads or pasta. After a meal like this, serve yourself for dessert. What do you think about the food thing?

Are we talking about, like, again, where I think stuff is cheesy and it might not be with the whole.

Strawberries?

Yeah, I guess so. See, all of it is kind of cliche, but sometimes it can be kind of hot to play with food. It can just now and then when you've been doing everything the same way. Okay, those are my sex tips. Those are, like, 11 of them. Okay, let's talk to Scott and Alameda. Hey, Scott. Hi there. Hi, Scott. Thanks for calling Sex with Emily.

Thanks for having the show. My sex tip is termed rotating the crops. And the idea is that when you determine something that really works for your partner, not to persist at it too much, but to put it in the back pocket, keep exploring, find something else that works, then rotate back to the first. And the idea is to get as many balls in the air as possible so that you can juggle the things that they like the best without overdoing any of them.

Huh. That's a good point. And have you found that you've been with people who have enough of those things to build up?

Well, I find that sometimes, you know, some of the things based on the partner, things that, you know, work for your partner, and then other times, it's a matter of continuing the exploration and not kind of falling into the old, easy ways to necessarily do It. So it kind of creates a combination of creativity as well as remembering your resources.

Yeah, I like that. I like that. You see, you have a lot in your back pocket and use them on rotation. Is there anything that you can tell us? Any kind of sex things that you've learned that we could. That you could share on the radio?

You know, actually the ones that I mentioned to your screeners that said were inappropriate.

Oh, okay. Yeah, they're inappropriate. I'm sure they're great, but we just can't talk about them on the air.

Yeah, but I think people get the idea.

Yeah. Okay. Thanks, Scott. I appreciate it. Have a great night. Anyone have any sex tips? Your one standby. Sure thing. That always works for you. 800-400-369-7.

We have a very limited amount of time.

Oh, we have very limited. How much time do we have? Like three minutes?

I would say two minutes.

Two minutes. So we gotta wrap up. This was such a good show. Oh, I had the best time ever. This was a great show. Love my guests. Love the show. Thank you to Fox from Daisy of Love Menace. I never would have watched that show if you did not bring that to my attention.

You're gonna be hooked now.

I'm hooked on it. You.

You want to see? He was really nice.

Very nice and cute.

I think he kinda gets a bad rap because television can make you out to be whoever they want.

But he had a girlfriend.

Yeah, you said it wasn't a big deal.

It's not a big deal. I've had boyfriends that didn't know about other boyfriends.

It goes both ways. I mean, I'm not defending his actions, but I mean, I'm not trying to date him. So I think he was cute.

He was cute. And then Celeste and Danielle, sex coaches. You can find them at celeste and danielle.com. they really are doing some groundbreaking work. There's a lot of people teaching sex stuff in the Bay area, but they're like. They're like some of the best. I have to say, I really, truly, truly believe that. That you should check out their courses. And so I want to thank everyone for listening tonight. And I want to thank my producer, Menace and Marcelaina, the jack of all trades over there. Love you, Marcelaina. And the show will be podcast. You can find it at Sex with Emily. And so thanks for listening. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com.

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