SWE: Relationship Resolutions

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they called them in a bygone day.

Hey Emily, you got a boyfriend? 'Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken.

He thinks you're kind of cute. A girl's gotta have her standards. Oh my.

Do women know about shrinkage?

Isn't it common knowledge?

What do you mean, like laundry?

It shrinks?

Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my God, that feels I'm so drunk.

Being bad feels pretty good. But you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to all of our shows and become a Friends with Benefits member. We love our Friends with Benefits members. We so appreciate everyone becoming members. You get 4 shows a week and lots of perks and benefits, and you're our friends and we appreciate that. We need a way to support the show, and thanks everyone for supporting us. It is Free Friday, and I'm sorry we're starting a few minutes late. We had some technical issues. Um, but here we are and I'm very excited for today's show. We're gonna be talking to Dr. Yvonne Fulbright. She is a sex expert. She's an international sexologist, sex educator, author, relationship expert. She's gonna be giving us some great tips how to improve your relationship in the new year. These are just some amazing tips and I was like, you gotta be on our show. So we are gonna be calling her in a little bit and, um, we are gonna be reading your emails and some other fun things. We might get to breasts. We've got some stuff on breasts we're gonna talk about today. If not, we'll do it on Monday. Hey, Madison, what's up? Happy Free Friday.

I know. Hi, how you doing?

I'm great. How are you?

I'm just, uh, looking at over— I'm looking over like 3 different computers at the same time right now because I'm sorry, you're getting a little frustrated over technical issues.

I know, because I'm annoyed. We start at 1 o'clock. It's a Free Friday show. I wanted to start on time and we just have a new computer in here.

We have a new computer in here and we're trying to get two computers on the internet using the same network and they just don't wanna work together.

They just don't wanna work, so I'm really sorry if you guys have been waiting and yeah, but here we are.

It's 'cause we have a guest, that's why, and we have to call the guest, we need the internet for the guest and ugh.

Anyway, it doesn't matter.

It's a big hassle, but anyways, hi.

Hi, happy Friday. So you gonna have sex this weekend?

Why not? Why the hell not?

I'm trying new things and, you said your New Year's resolution was to have more sex this year, so I'm just saying, I'm just saying, that's all I'm saying.

Random people.

Oh, random, random acts of sex. Yeah, I think you should do it.

I'll be going to, uh, different places, uh, this weekend, so maybe it might happen. We should be in Vegas this weekend.

I know, but isn't it next weekend we're supposed to be in Vegas, or is it this weekend? I think it's next weekend. I'm still working on it. P.S., I'm gonna try to get us there.

Yeah, because we're—

yeah, don't, don't, don't, don't think I'm not trying. And, and don't, don't write me off yet because I still might make stuff happen that'll blow your mind.

That would be amazing. I know, I would love it. I mean I have so many friends that will be there too, and it would just be a good time. I know, they just go there.

You and I in Vegas, it would be crazy. I don't even— I don't even— I'm afraid for us.

I know, we would promote the hell out of whatever. I don't care if you have like a dog caca mustache product, I will—

I will, uh, somebody flies to Vegas next weekend, we will be so much fun, I promise. Um, so that's what's up.

Somebody already offered that, uh, stay. I, I'm not down to stay in a random person's—

I know, someone did. But thank you, thank you for—

thank you for offering.

Listener who emailed us so we could stay in your room. You don't want Menace in your room. He throws up over balconies.

Yeah, and I don't even stay in my parents' room, so don't you be offended. Like, my parents' house, I want my own room. I was just talking to my mom today and she's like, you talked to your mom?

Finally, thank God.

Yeah, I talked to her all the time.

Oh, I feel like—

short.

Okay.

I see, like, with women, like, my mom my entire life will have like 2, 3-hour phone conversations with my grandmother, and I don't understand, like, what do you talk about?

Women, we love the phone. We like talking on the phone. I talk to my mom for hours— not hours, but like half hour sometimes. There's so much to talk about. We talk about— we process our emotions, how we're feeling, what we're doing. I get that men are not down with the phones. That's why they invented text messaging.

Yeah, but my mom—

for the man— text, I know, email.

I was kind of getting over a technical thing, getting on my mom because she has all these animals. She has like llamas, she has sheep, she has all these dogs, chickens, all that stuff. And I want her to send me photos of them.

Right?

Right.

I get like one photo every 6 months, and the photo's like all cropped and like all messed up, like through email. And I'm like, Mom, come on, right?

You just got to go there to the farm and take the pictures yourself or whatever it is. Yeah, you just don't want to see your mom.

My stepdad is also like— because my stepdad, he like works on electronics, like he builds like, like motherboards and crazy stuff like that, right? He's super technical, but he's like me with you. Like, I, I don't want to waste my time and teach you on some technical technical stuff because I'm just gonna be wasting my time.

I know a lot more than you think. I really do. I do. I know.

I just get frustrated.

So I know. I hate when you get frustrated with me. It's scary.

I could understand why I would just get a one photo every 6 months because my stepdad does not want to teach.

I understand.

I don't even know why my dad and my mom are still not together because my dad is like the least tech-savvy person on the planet.

Most parents are not that tech-savvy. My mom was like, got her iPhone, didn't understand it. It doesn't understand Facebook. She's like, I keep getting all these things on Facebook requests and I don't know what to do.

And I'm like, oh my God, I gotta come home and —and my stepmom, well, my former stepmom, I don't even know what she is anymore now, but she was super technical too.

But she just, yeah, well, parents, I don't know, I don't want to write off all parents. Some are really good at it, some are not. But we've got a big announcement to make. We've got a show tonight on SiriusXM. I know, you just reminded me. We've got a Friday night slot now, so if you have SiriusXM, it's Extreme Talk 165. It's at 6 PM Pacific Standard Time, 9 o'clock Eastern Standard Time, and we're right before the Artie Lange Show.

It's Artie and someone else. Artie and Nick DiPaolo.

Right, exactly. So we've got a show there, so everyone should listen. We're very excited about that.

That is, I mean, before Artie Lange is a big deal.

Yeah, he's Howard Stern's right-hand guy for how many years?

Oh, many years. Forever. I mean, I don't know Howard Stern without Artie Lange. Right. Like, Artie Lang is a legend. I know, so how fun. He's hilarious. He's, uh, he's the real deal.

He is the real deal.

Wasn't he like an addict, or he is an addict, or, uh, yeah, he, he's, uh, had been out of rehab, in and out of rehab, right? Yeah, he's had an extremely, uh, hard life too, with early childhood where his, his, I believe his dad, uh, was a construction worker and fell off a roof. Oh my God, his back and paralyzed himself and all this kind of stuff.

That's so sad, didn't know that. Yeah, so everyone's got messed up childhood. Yeah, people, who doesn't? Who doesn't? I did, but, um, I'm all fine now. Speaking of, I'm so normal and healthy. That's what's so weird about my messed up childhood is that I came out, I came out so well and, um, healthy. And so tonight, actually, so speaking of rehab, no, I'm sober January. This is sober January. A bunch of my friends are doing sober January, so no drinking, whatever. But I have a birthday party tonight, I know, and like my friend's gluten-free, so it's gonna be like a sober-free gluten-free birthday party. Oh my God, it sounds so amazing. I know, it's like my friend was like, oh, were you gonna play like Canasta and drink herbal tea after? Like, what's gonna happen to this party? Tonight. So that's my January, but it'll be fun. It's a birthday party and I don't need to drink. I don't need to do that kind of stuff anyway.

So I didn't even realize that, um, that today was Friday at all. Really? When I got up to work and I was sitting in the studio and I, I realized, I go, wait a minute, today's Friday.

I know, I'm so excited. How did you not realize Friday's the best day ever?

I know, but we've been recovering from all the—

you've been recovering— time off and stuff. No, I know, it's, it was a crazy week because it always is the week you get back from holiday, the week, you know, everyone's like Putting things off till January, January, January. Now we're all back and we're ready to talk about sex. So here we are.

Yeah, I've been, uh, yeah, I told you the— it's been slow, but it's starting to pick up with, you know, crazy stories. Um, this is how slow it is.

Uh, you mean news is slow? News? Yeah, not us.

We're not slow. No, no, no, right? Uh, we're fast. Bristol Palin got like a speeding ticket for $40. No, no, a taillight out for $40, and that was news.

Really? Yeah. Sarah Palin's daughter? Who cares? Yeah, really? That's the news? Crystal Palin? Why is everyone on their best behavior right now? And then like Selena Gomez's stalker was caught or something? Was that what happened? That's all we heard in the news today. We don't even have Sex in the News for you today because there is no news.

Do you know what I did read? Um, do you know Terrell Owens, the football player? He's had reality shows. No.

Anyways, why do you even ask? He's a good-looking gentleman. Oh, I should know him.

Maybe that's why I would— I should bone him.

Uh, well, I don't know if he's younger and not married, right?

Right now he's been injured and he was out of the NFL, and— but he's had like a lot of— he's had a lot of success and made a lot of money. He currently right now is in 4 different paternity test, um, like things, disputes or whatever.

4 women are claiming that he's their baby daddy. Yeah, that's crazy. 4 different women at once. Mm-hmm. Oh my God, that's a lot. I'm surprised it didn't happen to like Tiger Woods or all those guys who slept around, but like, yeah, you think that would have happened more, but 4 at once? Are you serious? That is news. I know, I'm not gonna bone him. Forget it. I'm totally cool.

He's already paying child support too, so he had to say, um, he had to go back to the court and say, hey, look, I'm out of the NFL, I'm not making that much money anymore, I'm paying like $4,000 plus a month for child support.

All he need— okay, one word for him: condoms. What the hell? Like, what? Why are people sleeping around and not using protection? People, you can get people pregnant. It happens. You can get sexually transmitted diseases. You get people pregnant. Put on a freaking condom. And seriously, it costs a lot. Get a Lifestyles condom. We love Lifestyles. They sent us 1,000 condoms. Oh, nice.

I know. I didn't get any.

Oh, do you want some? Yeah, hook me up. We've got them. I've used most of them. Oh, okay.

So you have about 2 left.

Exactly. Uh, no, not true.

But also, I don't know, $4,000 a month to take care of a kid, that, that's a little much.

No, that's, that's about—

well, $4,000 a month.

Well, it depends if you send your kid to private school.

I'm never having a kid if it costs $4,000 a month to have a kid.

It for sure costs $4,000 a month. That's you back to school and presents and healthcare. And doesn't it cost that? I would think it would. Oh man, maybe not. I don't know. I, I never had a kid. I have a dog and she costs me a lot of money, but that's, that's a different story. Um, and, uh, what are you doing tonight? Anything fun? I'm playing Canasta. You're playing golf? And not drinking. No, Canasta or whatever. I'm kidding because we're not drinking, so I don't know what we're doing.

Do you know what my big plans are? I've been fiending to go, and it's not as accessible in the city, to go to Taco Bell.

Like, I love Taco Bell. I know, you talk about Taco Bell all the time. It's disgusting. Taco Bell is so good. Oh my God, I was a bartender— not a bartender, I was a cocktail waitress in college, and we had a Taco Bell little thing inside the bar and we got free Taco Bell at 2 o'clock at night. No, it was a real Taco Bell in the bar and I got free Taco Bell all through college. I can never eat it again. Oh my God. 'Cause you're drunk. I would work as a waitress, but then we would drink because we were in college and while we were working and then we would just like pound like burritos and tacos.

Taco Bell has, I believe since you've been in college, has progressed in coming up with new things for you to try. And it's effin' delicious.

So wait, you're gonna go find it? You're like on a Taco Bell hunt?

Yeah, I need to go eat Taco Bell.

Where does it exist in the city?

Um, there's a couple places. There's actually—

Oh, there's one in the Marina, I think, right?

Yeah, there's one in the Marina. That's the one that I go to. Right. And see, the funny thing is about Taco Bell, they always come out with new stuff, but it's always the same ingredients. Exactly. Well, that's Mexican food.

Mexican food is the same ingredients. It's like beans, rice, cheese, and meat sometimes. Yeah. And tortillas. That's all it is, just mixed up in different ways. Like, what the hell is different between enchilada and a burrito? The enchilada has the sauce on top or something? I never know.

Enchilada is so effing good. It has the red sauce on it.

The red sauce, right. But it's like a burrito.

But it has like the melted cheese on top of it, and then you just put the chicken in it.

Oh my God. That's what you're doing tonight. Sounds fun.

I have the biggest boner right now talking about it. Really? Yeah.

You get a boner from Taco Bell? That's so interesting. Oh my God, it's so sexy. I know, I love it. Um, we are, um, we are poll— we have our poll results in. Oh really? What? We're gonna have a new poll up next week. You're interested, right? Because this is what our fans said. We had a question on our website, sexfamily.com. What do you want to accomplish in the bedroom in 2012? 39% said— this is the winner— a threesome. 21% would like to try a new sex toy. 16% would like to get tied up and maybe use a whip too. 17% would like to try mutual masturbation. And, uh, that's what people wanna try. So 39% want threesome. That's still so coveted. Why does everyone have a threesome? They're overrated. I mean, they're fun, but they're, they're, you know, I mean, they're not overrated, but they're so, it's so like tricky to get into a good threesome scenario. No, you have to have people like, I know if you're in a relationship and we've done shows on this before, but just a tip, since 39% of you are jonesing for a threesome this year, You have to make sure if you have a partner and you want a threesome that you need to discuss the rules before you jump into the threesome. So if you get wasted and you find a hot chick at the bar, not a time to do it. Like, talk about it beforehand. Is there kissing involved? Is there penetration involved? Are you allowed to sleep with the other woman? I'm assuming it's a guy with two women. That's what most people are talking about. Yeah. And you gotta have the rules because it can really mess up a relationship. I've been so close so many times, just—

I'm surprised you haven't.

You probably just pass out. That I would just pass out? I don't know, maybe. You just gotta stay awake. Um, and then— So close. So close, but yet so far. Um, so that's what people say to us. And also, I guess gotta talk about this real quick. This is important. AdamandEve.com have this amazing offer, and since everyone's obsessed with the Kardashians, if you use coupon code EMILY at checkout, you get 50% off one item, plus the free Kim Kardashian sex DVD, a free mystery gift, and free shipping. So that's offer code Emily at checkout. And you should really go to Adam and Eve because you can get really any kind of sex toy. You can get lingerie, you can get cock rings, which are amazing. Mm-hmm. Vibrating cock rings. One of my favorite things. Yeah. You love vibrating cock rings. I love them because it's, it's a win-win. What's the— rubber spikes on 'em or just like— no, they're because they vibrate though. No, because they're, they're stretchy. They fit over most penises. One size fits most penises. And then it has a little vibration Hits a woman's clitoris, and as we know, women need clitoral stimulation. Huge fan. Huge, huge, huge fan.

Are you a fan of huge cock rings or any size cock ring?

Any size cock rings. Okay, um, but most of them are stretchy so they fit over most penises, even yours. Oh really? I don't know, I think so. Um, we could call our guest right now since we were running a little late. I'd say we give Yvonne Fulbright a call right now. She's going to give us advice for the new year Tips for your relationship, and they're awesome tips actually, how to, how to just keep your relationship healthy and strong and make it even stronger than it is right now. Because everyone's doing their quitting smoking, quitting drinking, going to the gym, whatever your resolution is. I think personally, if you're in a relationship or you want to be in a relationship, you should look to make improvements there.

Just use the tip. Use the tip.

Only the tip. Only the tip. Okay, let's give her a call.

And okay, so I'm Just tell them what's happening.

Okay, so this is what's happening. I'm using my cell phone and it works with the speaker against the microphone because we—

that's why the show started so late because we're having problems getting both computers on the internet. We have to call an IT person to come down here to fix it.

And we're at Stitcher Studios, it's not their fault.

We even asked Stitcher people to help us out and we need a person that knows how to handle IP addresses and all that stuff.

Exactly, but we've done this before and it actually is fine sound on my Droid. Yeah, it just It just looks funny. It looks funny, so I'm calling her and then I'm gonna, um, put her on speaker. So Yvonne Fulbright, she's a noted international sexologist, sex educator, author, relationship expert. She's awesome. We are calling her now.

Hello?

Hello, it's Emily. Hi, Yvonne. Hi, how are you? I'm good, how are you? Thanks so much for being on the show today.

My pleasure, thanks for having me. Yeah, I want—

I love your tips, and we're talking about you've got some amazing suggestions for couples and people in relationships to improve their, their relationship in the new year.

Right, right. Well, amongst them is sort of the whole thing of carpe diem, you know, when you're in the mood. I think a lot of people are very guilty of thinking that there always needs to be a proper time and place, and then they'll have these libidinal stirrings, and it's like, wait, wait, I can't go with that right now. It, you know, it's not convenient, or I don't look a certain way, or maybe my partner's not gonna be receptive. You know, those, get rid of those thoughts and just seize the moment.

Exactly. Like, it's so true. We sometimes we feel that we don't, yeah. You feel like people, so we, so people feel like they're not in the mood or they're not ready and you're saying just do it. Just go for it.

Have sex. Exactly. You never know when you're gonna have that opportunity again. And then I know as people get older, sometimes they look back on those times and those stirrings came a lot more easily, and it's like, why didn't I just run with it when my body was much more cooperative? So, you know, you're not getting any younger.

Go ahead and take advantage. Exactly. Tell me about it, right? You got to just have sex. And a lot of times with women too, if they're not in the mood, I always say this, like, just start going, just start doing it, and then you get there, you know? Like, you're not in the mood, you're not warmed up yet, just keep going, go through the motions, and you'll be psyched.

Well, I know it's the whole thing too, you know, when the body does have, um, sex, then it does boost testosterone production, and then it's the testosterone it has both men and women desiring more sex. So sometimes it's just, you know, getting your toes wet and then suddenly all of you's wet and you just want to submerge yourself even more. So it's nice, nice, nice sensations.

Awesome. Okay, and then next on your list is communicate proactively.

Definitely. This kind of goes back to the whole thing that we all assume that our lovers are mind readers, and I think Mars-Venus definitely perpetuates this. Especially as far as the genders trying to analyze what the other is thinking or saying behind the other's back, or analyzing when it comes to sex and relationships. And really, go ahead and ask questions. Go ahead and put your needs out there. Basically, have the conversations that need to be had before you even realize they maybe need to be had, just so you're very much in tune with each other and know especially what your relationships and sexual expectations are. Exactly.

Because people think, though, I'm just gonna wait, it's not that bad, doesn't bother me that much, maybe I'll bring it up later. And it's like, just bring it up in the moment when you're having an issue, or that day, because things build up and then you're mad and angry and you have a blowout.

A lot of times, um, you'll find that your partner was wondering the same thing or was totally misunderstanding you, and there's this huge communication breakdown. And I think it's really important for people to be able to clarify, um, where they stand on things and to Like you're saying, basically ultimately avoid a lot of issues and, and getting things out in the open.

Exactly. Exactly. Okay. And then next we've got, um, plan your strategy.

Yes. It's so easy to think of all these great ideas, but that you're gonna do them later or you can put them in your planner like, oh, second week in February is when I'm gonna plan this for June's vacation. No, like do as much as you can now approach it almost like you wouldn't. Some people aren't gonna like this analogy, but almost like you would wedding planning. Where you have this whole checklist of stuff you know you need to do for the big event and you just start chipping away at it right away. And then the more you get done early on, the easier it's going to be to execute on things later. So just go for it, get it off your plate, have it all there waiting for you, and it's just going to make for a much more pleasurable experience when it comes to the date, the romantic getaway, you know, whatever you plan for the two of you.

Right. I mean, it's so true because people think like— this is what I said right before I called you— is that the reason why these tips are so important is that people just aren't prioritizing their relationships. They're just not. They're, they're, they're thinking, oh, that relationship's fine. I'm gonna work on everything else. But your relationship, it's probably the most important thing. You know, it's the only thing you spend— person you might spend the most time with. And it's important to make these plans. You're absolutely right.

And get all the support that you need lined up sooner versus later. And that isn't just, you know, booking hotel reservations or making flight reservations or whatever, but it's like making sure you've got, you know, the family in place for people who are willing to take your kids for the week. Or setting up a regular trustworthy babysitter every other Friday night so that you can make sure you're getting that date in. Um, instead of just kind of hoping that it's going to happen, that you can hit up people later. It's harder for them to say no when it's advanced planning. That's so true.

And I have so many friends who are like, oh, I couldn't find a babysitter. I'm like, this town is filled with people who would babysit for you. You know, just think 5 minutes ahead.

Right? Yeah, definitely. Okay.

And then next we have, um, start each— start and end each day with a kiss. I love that.

Yeah, just a really great way of connecting and expressing love. And, uh, you know, research has actually found that it's these couples that start each day and end each day with a kiss that are reporting that they're happier. And sure enough, happiness is gonna contribute to longevity and staying together, and it makes it a lot easier. And, and, um, You know, very much let your partner know you are a priority to me.

Yes, exactly. I love the kiss before bedtime or in the morning. It's such a great way of connecting. It's important to do, you know?

And so simple. So simple.

I know, just a kiss. Okay, make a list. Is it okay I'm just reading these 'cause I got 'em from your thing? So make a list of fun things to do together. I love that too.

Well, I don't know about you, but I can be a scatterbrain sometimes. Like there, you know, for example, look at movie listings on the— subway to work in the morning and it's like, oh, I'd love to see that flick. And then when it comes time to maybe being able to go out on a date, I draw a total blank as far as, you know, what was I thinking would make for a really nice movie date night. So, you know, when ideas come up, whether they're, you know, sexual, romantic, or adventurous, um, keep an ongoing list going. And that way when the time, whether it's all of a sudden or well in advance, is either to do some planning, then it's right there. You've got all these great ideas. You don't even have to waste time doing more research. Exactly.

It's like start a doc— right, it's like start a document in your smartphone or whatever, like on the notepad, and just every time you think of something, write it down.

Exactly.

That's what you gotta do. Okay, and then treat yourselves to a regular massage. Why is massage so important?

Well, you know, whether it's gonna be coming from your lover or from an actual massage therapist, it just helps to work out all the stressors. And we know from working with a lot of people, and this goes for both men and women, but especially women, it's like if you can't relax relaxed, if you're hanging on to the day's anxieties, if you're stressed to the point where your muscles are all tense, then it's going to be really hard to transition from that state to a state to really get it on. What a lot of people don't realize is that the more worked up you are from the day's stressors, the less receptive your body is to intimate sexual touch. So, you know, making sure you're working out all the kinks and that you're getting yourself into a relaxed state is what's ultimately going to get you more revved up and responsive to sexual advances when they happen.

Exactly. So massage is so— it does release so much in you. You don't realize how tense you are, and it is true that stress is one of the biggest factors why people don't have sex or they can't get into it. I mean, men and women, why they're not in the mood is because their, their, their mind's going crazy. And massage is another way just to quiet down your mind and focus on your body and get yourself ready.

Such a, such a wonderful transition from two very different worlds. It's a lot of pressure to put on yourself or to put on your lover. Like, hey, you just got home from work and I'm gonna jump you. Right. Sexy state of mind, unless there's a lot of, you know, intellectual mental foreplay going on, or you've been kind of cheating on each other all week with cum, and that's what's been on your brain all day. Uh, you know, people need that time to transition and unwind, and, uh, massage is a really effective way to do that.

That's great. Okay, I love the massage. Um, do something novel this year.

Yeah, you know, um, this kind of goes along with our earlier point of being a little plan your strategies for 2012 loving. And this goes along with what can you guys do together, and this could be also outside the bedroom, as far as bonding, connecting, having experiences together, of course the novelty being key when it comes to raising dopamine levels in the brain and throughout the body, and dopamine being that hormone neurotransmitter that is the same one that spikes when we fall in love. So it's going to create a lot of those those few good feelings for your partner, for your relationship, for your sex life ultimately. And so here it's like, what can we do with our new adventure this year? And that might be for a couple who's been hiking but never done a certain type of trail or gone to a certain part of the country, or people who want to take salsa tango swing lessons because they never have and they always thought it would be cool, or taking a kayaking class. I've actually known people who met from those sorts of hobbies outside of work. Work. So, um, you just never know what these sort of adventures can offer you. That's so true.

And even if you're single and you're listening to this, it's like, it is true that, you know, you— these are all things you could do yourself too. I mean, you could, yeah, take a new class, do something that you've always wanted to do, and it is a great way to meet people. Yeah, get yourself out of the bar.

Yes. And I have single friends too who are being really good to themselves this year. I think it's because a couple of them are turning 40, but It's like, you know what, I'm single and I've always wanted to go to Thailand, or I'm gonna plan a multi-city trip to Europe, um, just because I'm wonderful and I have a girlfriend wanting to go and we're gonna have a blast. And I love those people for, you know, carving their time and not waiting around for somebody special to do that with. Right.

It's true. It's true. And there are more single people than ever, you know, than, than at any time before. You know, there are more single people, there are people delaying marriage. Change, just do something that you've always wanted to do. January is such a good month to connect. Exactly. Okay, address personal, personal issues that affect your relationship.

Sure, this one is for those couples who are dealing with an issue, or maybe one person in the relationship has some unresolved issues. And I know whether it's that you're somebody who's been dealing with child sexual trauma, One time you've been sexually assaulted, found out your partner has cheated on you, is not happy with your sex life, feeling unresponsive sexually to your partner but not to other things. I mean, there are so many issues that people don't tackle thinking that maybe they're not a big deal or that one day they'll get to a better place. Let this be the year to treat yourselves to individual and/or couples counseling.

Exactly. Couples counseling, just, I tell this all the time, is that couples, you might just need a little tune-up. I'm not saying you have to go for life. I'm not saying that anything's terribly wrong, but I mean, a few sessions, you know, or commit to a few months can make a huge difference in a relationship if you're finding that, you know, you're not able to communicate with each other anymore. If you just hit a roadblock and there's some issue that's holding you back.

So yeah, if anything, you're gonna have hopefully better communication, at least better awareness of how you're not communicating so you can take the steps to try to address issues sooner. But there is absolutely no shame in seeking any kind of outside help, and a lot of couples have been better off for it.

So, okay, I like it. Um, improve your libido through good nutrition. Now, we just had a long talk about Taco Bell before we called you. No, delicious. Yeah, Menace here, my co-host, he was talking about how he's gonna go eat Taco Bell this weekend. Well, why is that not a good idea?

Well, you know, there's a thing is there are bad fats and then there are good fats, and you're going to find good fats in foods like salmon, nuts, or olive oil, which tend to not be in your Taco Bell product or fun at all.

It's no fun, man. It's true.

But yeah, that isn't fun. But you know, it's maybe a great way to take care of a hangover the next day. Recharge that way. You know, definitely if it puts a smile on your face, there can be some, you know, effects of that. But if you're really actually wanting to go for a well-balanced diet, then you want antioxidant-rich foods, and these are the ones that are like red peppers, garlic, spinach, and berries. And you want these sorts of foods because these antioxidant-rich ingredients help to keep your cells healthy. Of course, keeping your keep your cholesterol low, it's going to help your cardiovascular system, which is going to help avoid any sex issues that involve blocked blood supply. So, for example, it helps men to avoid erectile dysfunction to consume foods that are going to help them keep their cholesterol levels lower. And then you've got foods like chili peppers or ginger that are thought to improve circulation and stimulate nerve endings, so that's why they're often recommended as aphrodisiacs or little, you know, a taste to slip into meals.

I'm just saying, Taco Bell— Taco Bell is an aphrodisiac.

Taco Bell's an aphrodisiac for men. He's got a lot of issues.

And it doesn't give me erectile dysfunction. It's not—

yet it doesn't give you erectile dysfunction, but eventually it will give you Viagra. Oh, it's so sad.

Well, as long as nobody's around when he, uh, to get rid of it, I suppose. Bad gas, bad calls.

Okay, sexercise for health and fitness. Yeah, definitely.

The whole thing of so many people are going to the gym and getting on their treadmills, and more power to them, but they're not recognizing the fact that you can actually be working off even more calories, and sometimes much more pleasurably so, with vigorous sex sessions. Physiologists tend to recommend at least 3 times a week, and you're going for, you know, as much as 20-30 minutes if possible. But of course it's going to vary depending on people, but you can burn up to 150 calories in that time period. If you need a more active partner, as in the more, either, you know, for example, man on top where he's thrusting, or woman on top where she's riding. But yeah, the more active you are, the more calories you're going to burn. Burned, and then you're getting your muscles more toned in general. I love it.

I'm canceling my gym membership, but I'm just going to find someone to have vigorous sex with. I love it.

Yeah, well, it definitely, um, inspires for that kind of gusto energy that a lot of people complain is lacking in their sexual relations.

Right, okay, that sounds good. Menace, you can start exercising. Yeah, right away, right? Sexercising. Okay, feather your love nest.

Yeah, this is actually getting at the whole idea of feng shui for the bedroom. Bedroom and really looking at how can I breathe new energy in. And that might be as simple as changing the color of your sheets or the types of sheets, you know, actually investing in a pair of maybe satin sheets for those special weekends where you are hopefully not going to leave bed, to painting your walls. Maybe one that's red with gold dust painted in, that can have a really nice effect. To making sure that there's no clutter in the room. Like, that's something that sounds really simple, Getting rid of any technology, and if you must have a TV in there, you know, have it in a closed cabinet because a lot of Eastern approaches to room decor will say, you know, energy in the bedroom, technology, not good for you, not good for your sex life.

Yeah, you got to get rid of the TV in the bedroom. I always tell couples that. Just do not have the TV in the bedroom. Why do you need it in the bedroom?

You say that because you don't watch TV. That's why.

Yeah, but if I did watch TV, I wouldn't want it in the bedroom. It's a distraction. You're like, oh, we could have sex or we could watch David Letterman or whatever people watch.

What do you do when you are not having sex in the bedroom? You talk? Hell no. You read?

You give each other sensual massage?

That sounds like a nightmare.

I just picture Menace in bed eating Taco Bell, watching TV. Taco Bell, yeah. Okay, okay, read a book about sex.

This sounds so simple, but more people need to treat themselves to all the rich literature that's out there and then all the different types of sex books. I mean, the topic, somebody's written on it. There's just so much great reading out there to be done, and I get so many questions where I feel like almost every time I want to refer somebody to an entire book that I've written or one of my colleagues' or friends' books because it's like, you know, you can only give somebody so much information in like 300 words and they can just learned so much, become so much more empowered in learning thoroughly about all the sexual positions out there, the erogenous zones, the types of orgasms, you name it. So go ahead and do some really quality reading for 2012 and make yourself more sexually savvy for it. That's good.

And you have some, you have some books. You said, what are your books? You have 9 books? That's a lot of books.

I have 9 books out right now, yeah. And actually, if people go to my website sexualitysource.com, they can learn more about them. But amongst my favorites are Sultry Sex Talks to Seduce Any Lover and then The Better Sex Guide to Extraordinary Lovemaking. Those are two pretty good, as far as comprehensive reads on those subjects.

Okay, that's great. That should— why not read up? People read books on everything else, so they should read books about sex. Absolutely.

Yeah, and they're all going also as eGuides now and digital, and there's no excuse. And honestly, the publishing industry has gone nuts as far as visual images to complement these books too. So, I know Better Sex Guide to Extraordinary Lovemaking is packed with lots of really racy pictures. Okay, great.

So, you can check it out. Tell me your website again, please, so everyone can check you out. SexualitySource.com. SexualitySource.com. Okay. And, um, and you're the Astroglide ambassador. What does that mean? Do you have a lot of What is it?

How are you doing? I'm the sexual relationship ambassador for Astroglide, so I answer questions that they get through their website, post occasional articles, of course do occasional media gigs for them, but it's really helping them to give legitimate, qualified sex advice because people do look to various companies, whether they're makers of lube, condoms, sex toys as far as being authorities on this subject, and a lot of people behind the scenes haven't had any training in sexuality, so they thought we'd make a great team. And it's been almost a couple years now, I think, that we've been working together, and it's been a really good adventure. So definitely check out Astroglide.com for more information and tips and so forth.

I used to put together the video, uh, pre-rolls for radio stations for Astroglide.

You did? Oh, that's so funny. I love it.

It was just pretty— really great brand.

Yeah, let's add use more lube in 2012 for people too, because I think a lubricant is so important. It's not— people think it's just if you're dry or whatever, but it can— it really can enhance lovemaking for men and women.

Oh, I think I, I almost always have one on my bedside table because even if you don't need it, just a couple more drops can make all the difference.

Exactly. People don't realize that. I have like 15 lubes in my bedside and vibrators, but that's a whole other thing. But yeah, no, I totally— She used vegetable oil, right? No, menace. Don't even say things like that that are wrong. Okay, Yvonne Fulbright, thank you so much for joining the show today. I really appreciate it. I love your ideas. Happy New Year to you.

Thank you too. Thanks for having me.

Okay, it's great. Have a great day. Bye. Awesome. Those are great tips. Yeah, Yvonne Fulbright, PhD. You can find her at, uh, wherever we said our website was.

I'm sure it'll be up on sexwithemily.com.

It will be up on sexwithemily.com. And, um, I— you know what I like on here? I like start at the end each day with a kiss. Yeah, I really like that because even if you're fighting or whatever, when you have a boyfriend or girlfriend, whatever, your couple, your whoever you're with, just a kiss in the morning. Like, make sure you kiss. We're so busy, we're running around, we're doing stuff.

Just Kiss. It's nice. Yeah, I used to do that when I was seriously dating somebody.

Now you don't kiss anyone unless they're good kissers. Menace just writes chicks off if they're not good kissers.

If they're a bad kisser, it's over. That's it. That's so bad, Menace.

Why? Because I think that you can enhance— you can become a better kisser. Like, someone you're kissing can get better with somebody.

It could get better, but sometimes there's there's just those people you connect with.

I do not agree with you.

You haven't just had one person you just connected with, with kissing, like, oh my god, this is just—

I've had people that I really connect with through kissing and they're amazing, and then some that aren't, but then it gets better.

Don't give up hope. That's good. I just don't want to hang out with—

I know, you just don't.

Okay, but maybe they're not just bad kissers. Maybe just we don't have that, you know, that rhythm together, and then it's just not meant to be.

It's not meant to be, menace. Yeah, okay, well, uh, you're gonna have more vigorous— you're gonna have more vigorous sex in the new year, so you're gonna have to maybe do some more vigorous kissing too. I know.

Um, okay, let's get into some emails. I told you I kissed that lesbian like last month. No, I told you, right?

Oh yeah, yeah, but it was like a fun flirty fake kiss.

Yeah, I was just like, see, I got a lesbian to kiss me. How crazy is that? That's crazy, man. She's not even into guys.

She's not even into guys if she's into the white menace. Who doesn't want a little white menace? I charmed her. He charms the pants off of her or something, the lip gloss off of her. Okay, we've got some emails. All right. Ready? Today's topics include a few things: toys, pain during sex, understanding women. So our first question is—

Wow, understanding women, that's gonna be— Imagine that.

Hard. Can women and men really be friends? Friends. This is from CG, Orlando, Florida. He's a premium Friends with Benefits member. Yeah, men and women can really be friends. I used to think that, you know, when I was younger, maybe they can't, it's always about sex. Um, men and women can be friends for sure. I've got a ton of guy friends, and yes, some of them maybe I have slept with in the past, or it started out as a, um— that's not what they're talking about, like strictly friends.

Yes, men and women can totally—

I have so many guy friends that I'm not slept with as well. Men and women can totally be friends, but I think that a lot of times— I remember this, this was years ago, and I was sitting with my— I was boyfriend at the time— and his brother, who was probably like 21 at the time, he's like, you know what, I really don't understand the benefit of being friends with women. He's like, I don't get how you do it. Like, men, I think, are raised to be like, either I'm boning her or there's no need for women. And I think that as you get older and you mature, you realize that you can be friends with women. Don't you have a lot of women Yeah, I have a ton of women friends. Yeah, so I wonder what this question comes from. They really don't sleep with all of them.

You don't sleep with all of them?

No, I said I would. You would? No, I'm just kidding. So do you have any women friends that you wouldn't sleep with? I mean, that's— that is what he's saying, is that like there's that whole like debate.

The problem is the ones I wouldn't sleep with would totally sleep with me. That's the only thing.

Uh, man, this— what? How do you know they would sleep with you? Yeah, they all would. Should we call some of them? Um, no, we don't have to.

But like, you would sleep with me, right? Right?

That's why I would— do you always say that to them? No, no, no. But I've got tons of guy friends that I— that is nothing sexual. We're just really, really good friends. And I think it can happen for sure. Okay. Hi Emily, I'm sending this message.

What? I was waiting. You said for sure. I was waiting for you to say totes. Totes.

I know I've gotten a few. Okay. Oh, we have a survey. I would like to tell everybody about our survey that you need to fill out. It's on the Sex with Emily fan page on Facebook, which you should like if you haven't liked it yet. And I have a survey there, and I'd love everyone to fill it out. It's only 10 questions. It'll take you 5 minutes, and we want to know what you like about the show, what you don't like, what you'd like to improve. And, um, somebody said something about less totallys and awesomes. Okay, so I guess we do that a lot. I say awesome a lot. I say awesome and totally a lot. I live in California, people. I can't help it. It's in my DNA. Totes. Totes.

Okay, I say in a joking way, only around you. I know.

Did I start saying it first on the show?

I don't know. Maybe, I can't remember.

Totes. Uh, okay, this one is called, entitled, How Menish Should Get Over His Fear of Sex Toys. How I should get over my fear of sex toys?

This is an email to you. 'Cause it's not America, I can't do whatever I want. I have to embrace whatever you tell me.

I just think that the fact that you are so against them means that you should try it and see what happens.

Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm just not into it, people. God, you never tried it, you know, shoving sex toys down my throat.

I'm not shoving down your throat. I'd like to shove them elsewhere. Okay, so, hi Emily Morse, I'm sending this message for two reasons. Number one, my wife and I found a simple solution to Morse's dislike of both teasing and sex toys, that being the vibrating panties. It's a great way to tease your partner and incorporate the use of a vibrator. On our 5-year anniversary, we went out for dinner while my wife had a pair of these panties on. Every once in a while during dinner, I would just— You read this the other day. No, we talked about the vibrating panties, but I don't think—

I swear we did. Did we read this one? Yeah.

When they said that I have a Morse code, whatevs. No, I don't think we did. Okay. I don't think we did, and if we did, we're reading it again.

We did talk about it the other day because remember, I brought up how they had it, it was in that movie that I told you about.

Yeah, but I think I was talking about it for something else, 'cause number 2, he says I have the Morse code. I don't think we read this out loud. I could be wrong. You're wrong. We talked about vibrating panties. They're called— you can get them at Adam and Eve. They're called Astrea, A-S-T-R-E-A, I think, or just look up vibrating panties. Um, so he would discreetly turn on the remote, the vibrator via remote, and my wife got so turned on she told me if I didn't stop she would finish before we got dessert. She would have her orgasm before dessert. This would be a great way for men to test the waters of the sex toy realm. So do you want me to get you some? You got to find a chick who wears some vibrating panties Okay. And we do talk about these a lot on the show. We did talk about it. It wasn't because of this, but it, you put the little, the, it has a vibrator in the crotch area. Mm-hmm. And then you hold onto the vibrator and you're like turning around during dinner or at a party. It's really hot. Number 2, we've noticed that Emily has developed what I've come to call her Morse code. You tend to use shortened versions of everyday words, which may be confusing to some listeners.

We totally read this. I, we did. I know it is.

No, that may not speak English very well. For example, instead of saying whatever, you will say whatevs. Deets for details, sitch for situation, etc. I think it's rather funny when you use these code words. After all in all, you have an awesome show and we look forward to hearing what you and Menace have to say after the world— about the world's favorite pastime. Keep it up, Tyler from Calgary. He's a Premium Friends with Benefits member. Calgary. So, um, we did read that. I don't know, I remember reading it. How come I don't remember reading it? Was I here?

Uh, because you're a scatterbrain. Yeah, too much Too many things going on. But yet I know nothing that you do. What do you mean? You're like, oh, I'm always busy, I gotta go here, I gotta go there. But there's never like in detail what you're doing. I think that you have like this secret life that you live. You think I'm a spy? Maybe that you're, yeah, you're like a double agent or something.

You know what I do? I ran to Best Buy today right before the show to pick up this router that didn't work.

What does it look like before the show and then after the show?

We gotta post the show, we gotta do stuff, we got a meeting with our web team, we got a call with our web guys at 3, we've got— what do you want to know? A lot of stuff. Talk to the advertisers, talk to listeners. We email every listener.

But that doesn't go until late into the night.

I work late at night too sometimes. Yeah, oh my God. Tonight I'm having a sober-free dinner. Have I mentioned that? Mm-hmm. Friday night sober dinner.

Sounds like a party.

Jesus Christ, and a gluten-free cake.

Ugh, barf. 10. Who's gonna be there? I don't know, 10, something like that. Who's gonna get naked? How many guys, how many girls?

It's like half and half, I think. Really? Yeah. Who's gonna get naked? I don't know. Probably nobody when we're all sober. Everyone's sober. Sober January. I don't— all these people are sober. Most of them.

Are you just doing it because your friends are doing it?

Yeah, I just figured it would be a good— it would be good for me just not to do anything, just to see what happens in a month. I think I'll be a lot more productive. Not that I drink that much, but I just feel like I'm being healthy, going to the gym.

You seem a lot more stressed. I do? You were stressing over this technical stuff earlier.

Well, because we started the show 20 minutes late today, and people are waiting. It's Free Friday, and we weren't starting on time, and that makes me tense.

And itch. Oh, so you have— what's that? What's it called when you itch when you're stressed out? It's called—

I don't know, but I do get itchy. Kim Kardashian has it.

She does? Yeah, it's like— I was about to say halitosis, but that's your breath.

I don't know. That's your breath. That's really funny. Okay, anybody watch the Kardashians around here? God, I just started with my new television set, but I only watched Kourtney and Kim, or Kim and— yeah, that was not interesting. No, the one where she has has this— the skin thing is, uh, is the Kardashians still on though, the regular show?

It's off, but now it's off. Then they do the spin-off shows, and when the spin-off shows are over, then they go back to the regular Kardashians. That's what I'm constantly taping all the time. It's crazy.

That is crazy. Can you imagine? All the time.

Okay, all the time, every day, every day, cameras in your face. Yeah, hella producers everywhere.

That must be nuts. It must be Okay, pain during sex. Hi Emily, long time listener. Love it. Long time listener, you like that? I feel like I might have read this one too.

Maybe you grabbed the wrong folder today. You grabbed the wrong papers. It's okay. I mean, not everybody's heard every single show.

Okay, I'm gonna read this anyway. And we're sorry for anybody that's heard it before. Yeah, maybe I didn't. Maybe I read it personally to myself. Long time listener, first time emailer. I left my childhood religion and became a fan of sex toys in my 20s. Listened to your show and got tips which we used. And became more comfortable with my own sexuality as a result. But both myself and my fiancé still waited until our engagement for intercourse. I don't think I read this.

Oh, I saw a South Park episode about this last night. About what? About waiting until you get married.

Oh, people do that? Oh no, it was Family Guy. Family Guy, sorry. So anyway, they waited until their engagement for intercourse. However, once we got engaged and attempted intercourse for the first time, I was in a great deal of pain. It felt like he was hitting a wall. This continued for months and I went to my OB-GYN, gynecologist. She suggested an estrogen cream, more lube, and relaxation.

What?

O-G-B-Y-N is a gynecologist. God damn it, you've never known that?

I didn't know what that was and I was reading commercials for it like a while back.

Really? That's so funny. It's—

I go to your O-G-B-Y-N and they're like reading off some hotel— it's not hotel, hospital, uh commercial. I didn't know that's what I was telling everybody to go to.

You're telling everyone to go to the gynecologist. It's obstetrics— I don't even know how to say it— obstetrics and gynecology. It's OB-GYN. Uh, she suggested estrogen cream, more lube, relaxation. This failed, and I was open about my continual vaginal pain. On my first visit to my new doc— my new doctor— he diagnosed severe vaginal muscle issues, which meant that the muscles on either side of my vagina are spasming involuntarily. He was very pleased that I was so open and comfortable with my sexuality and took charge of my own sexual destiny. One prescription later and many dilator exercises later, we are now able to have sex. Thank you for the empowerment and healthy attitude towards sex that your show fosters. I hope it helps other women like me to take charge of their sexuality. From Ashley. So what Ashley is saying is that, uh, this show helped her feel more comfortable with her sexuality and open about it, that she was able to go to her doctor and talk about sex. And I think that that is why we do the show, and that makes me— that's why I'm here on the planet.

I learned something about the O-G-B-Y-N. O-B-G-Y-N. O-B-G-Y-N.

Yeah, because gine has to be together, G-Y-N at the end, so O-B-G-Y-N. O-B-G-Y-N. Yeah, Menace learned something today too. Oh my God, it's amazing.

It's like, well, people are going, how did he not know that? You're a dude, how would you know?

No, guys wouldn't know that. I've never been to a gynecologist. No, it's good times, let me tell you. You put your feet up in stirrups and they stick things inside you. It's not fun. So hot. We talked about this recently, 'cause I was like, my gynecologist once is a man. A lot of people go to women, and he was like, you have nice abs. And I thought that was kind of awkward and weird. I'm like, don't check out my abs, just check out my vagina. Oh yeah. Thanks for talking to me about that. How's my vagina? How's my vag? Okay, we've got one more email.

All right. What's wrong? No, nothing.

You said all right like you weren't jonesing for Taco Bell right now.

Okay, no, I was just looking at the time, just making sure.

We've got time. Not understanding women. Emily Morse, I have a couple questions about women that don't make any sense to me. Number 1, why do women lie when they say, I am not that kind of girl, I need to get to know you a lot better before I jump into bed with you on the first, second, or third date? Here is the evidence. If the guy that wants to have sex with her is just an average guy she's somewhat attracted to, then this is what she says. However, you and I know that if the guy who wanted to have sex with her was called Brad Pitt, Antonio Banderas, Orlando Bloom, or whatever her hot Hollywood crush is, then she would be having sex with him immediately without any problem. Why can't she just say to the average guy that she is not attracted to him and wish him well, as there are many other women who might find him attractive? Number 2, and then we'll go back to these. Number 2, women always say they cannot have sex without getting to know you first or having a commitment fine, but that's not really true. Once again, we are back to my central point of this big lie. If women claim they cannot have sex freely with a good-looking stranger, why is it okay when that stranger is Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or the hot exchange student from Italy with an accent who looks like something out of a Guess jean ad? I look forward to your thoughts on this as well. Lastly, I'm a professional musician living in LA. Early next year, 2012, I will be having a performance which will be hosted by a well-known celebrity, and I would like to invite you. —take care and look forward to hearing from you. Cheers, Sam from Los Angeles, California.

Thank you, Sam. Thanks, Sam.

Okay, so why do women lie when they say, 'I'm not that kind of girl'? I'm not saying that all women lie. There are different times in life. I don't— he's got some kind of— he lives in LA, first of all.

Oh God, this is a universal thing. This is not just LA. Why? Well, no, but he's like, 'Bring them up.' Happens all the time. What, that women lie to guys?

So he's saying that women should be more direct with men and say, 'No, it's not that I'm not that kind of girl.

I'm just not that into you.' I mean, eventually you might sleep with that guy, but she's just kind of on the fence initially because, you know, yeah, you might not be the, the CK model or something like that, right? Of course, because you know what, all women are liars. Guys are liars too. That's just—

we're not all liars, Menace.

This is how it works though. If you want that, if you really need for that woman to sleep with you at that time Immediately when she says that, say, okay, and then be totally standoffish. And then she'll like turn around and she's like, oh my god, this guy is so understanding. And then she'll sleep with you right away. Guarantee you, it works every single time. Just don't—

for— I don't think that's true, but I don't think that works every time.

I'm just saying is I've tested it.

So you kind of put— you kind of pull back.

I just pull back altogether and go, alright, well, if you don't want to do right now, I'm not gonna put any pressure on you. And then I just go about my night and just like continue like everything's all good. And then by that night, I'm already— I'm hooking up with them.

So what you're saying is you don't pressure women to have sex. You pull back and then they want you more. That's just like the standard, like, law of science that if something pulls away, so the other thing moves closer.

Yeah, it just— it just happens that way. And I guarantee you, if you do keep on trying to pressure them or talk about it, you're not gonna get laid.

There are times— I mean, but his second point is that women— women always say they can't have sex without first getting to know you or having a commitment. And I think that's true. I don't jump into sex with people.

Yeah, but she— he wants to know why—

why we'll sleep with the exchange student, the hot exchange student.

Some hot construction workers outside and we're like, oh, I'm just gonna bone him right now.

Because we know that he's a hot exchange student or a construction worker that maybe we don't have a relationship with that we'll have sex with. So Sam, maybe these people really are into you. See, some guys don't understand that. I know. This is what he's— I'm trying to explain it. I'm trying to explain it. Because they think sex and relationship are the same thing. They're not. So if a woman likes you— actually, if I've liked a guy in the past, I would wait wait to have sex. I would not want to rush into sex if I was— if a lot of women feel this way, that if they like someone, they actually want to delay sex so they're taken more seriously, the guy doesn't like take advantage of her, think she's a slut, or whatever it is. I think it's good to delay sex. I think it's, it's important. I, I delay sex most times lately. I try to. I think it's important to get to know someone first because then you get all caught up in the sex and then you forget that the person You just think about the sex. You're attracted to the person sexually, and you're not thinking about them emotionally, who they are. You don't see the red flags because you've had sex with them and all that stuff. So that's what I gotta say to that.

Just back off immediately that night. I'm not saying don't stop— don't, uh, stop calling them like, you know, the next day, because then they're gonna think, oh, he just wanted to sleep with me. Like, don't act like that. But you know, if they— if they tell you that Just back off and see what happens.

I just don't think that sex is something— yeah, I think that guys get all tripped out about women not wanting to have sex, and I think it's good to wait. So anyway, we gotta go. This has been a long show. Okay, sorry for starting late. Love everybody. Happy Friday. Happy New Year. Happy life. Happy weekend. All that stuff. Thanks everyone for— and check us out on SiriusXM tonight, XM Extreme 165, 6 PM Pacific, 9 o'clock Eastern. And everyone have a great weekend. Thanks for listening. Was it good for you? Email me From.