7 Dec 2025 · 62 min
Emily Morse and guest Ethan Imboden from Jimmy Jane discuss Valentine's Day gifts and sexual wellness products. They demo the afterglow massage-oil candle, explain how scent triggers the limbic response, and introduce Jimmy Jane's gift wizard tool. The episode covers practical low-cost date ideas and emphasizes self-love and touch in relationships.
Chapters
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Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex.
Eyes that mock our sacred institutions.
Bedroom eyes, they call them in a bygone day. Hey Emily, you got a boyfriend? Cuz my man E here, he just.
Got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.
A girl's gotta have her standards.
Oh my.
The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common knowledge?
What do you mean? Like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my God, that feels so good.
Being bad feels pretty good. But you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.
This episode is brought to you by one of our amazing sponsors, Masque Sexual Flavor Strips. They enhance your sexual experiences with a taste of strawberry, mango, watermelon or chocolate. It's kind of like a Listerine strip, but for sex. So if you like sex and you want to make it even more enjoyable and you like hearing sex with Emily for free, check out mask@sexualflavors.com. enjoy the show. I Promise your sex life will improve. You're listening. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can get all the sex information you need. And we guarantee you that if you listen to sexwithemily.com to all of our shows, you will have better sex. Right, Menace? He's gotta fix my mic. What up?
Perfect.
You're a genius. Okay, so everyone, this is a big. This is a really important show. This is, like, crucially important that everybody listens to the show. Because you cannot avoid Valentine's Day, which is coming up next week. And it's a big deal, because even if you hate Valentine's Day or you're single or whatever, it's gonna impact you in some way.
You hate Valentine's Day, right?
I don't hate Valentine's Day.
I'm very anti Valentine's Day.
I'm not anti Valentine's Day. I'm just a Valentine's Day proponent. I believe in Valentine's Day. I just think every day should be.
Like, you just don't want to put any effort in doing something.
If I had a boyfriend, I would.
Be a significant other. That's all.
That's so not true. Manas.
What?
So we are gonna give you so many tips today. It's a big day if you have a big day. Small budget, how to please a woman, how to please a man, some gift ideas, some things to do on Valentine's Day. And we also have a special guest. We have Ethan Imboden, who is the founder of Jimmy Jane, which is my favorite favorite toy line. And he makes incredible, award winning products. We're getting into those later. And he's gonna give some tips and how to use toys for couples and stuff like that. Sweet. Sweet. So what? Oh, and this is the most important thing if you want to win something on Valentine's Day. We are giving away so many things that my entire office looks like a warehouse right now. All you have to do is go to my website, sex emily.com, click on the banner, it'll tell you how to do it. But basically, you got to follow us on Facebook and Twitter, Sex with Emily. And just retweet us, repost us, reshare, retweet, whatever, and you will have a very good chance of winning something. Because I cannot live with my office's cluttery with sex toys.
And everything's@sextillantly.com sexylene.com.
Yeah, that's where it all happens if.
You want to get all the information. And you made a banner.
I made a banner.
A banner.
Did you see the banner?
It's very impressive.
Thank you. We. We didn't do that. We actually had someone else do it.
Yeah. But just the fact that there is.
A banner that was created especially for Valentine's Day, that's big time. We're big time. We're going places.
That's putting in some effort.
Of course. It's a big. I can't tell you how much. We just got something from Israel today.
Really?
Yep. A toy. A big toy. I don't even know what it is. I didn't really understand it. But we're gonna give it to someone. Maybe they understand it.
Okay.
But we've got some great stuff.
Cool.
Yeah. So. And it's great to be here on Extreme Talk 165.
Oh, it's Friday. I can't wait for the. For the weekend. I'm. What are you doing Los Angeles this weekend for the Grammys? That's gonna be really fun. I love hanging out there for the Grammys. Cause there's always parties going on and already got invited to a bunch of parties, so I'm really excited.
You're so cool.
Yeah, that's awesome. They're gonna be big social media party and then to the Grammy museum, to a party there. And it's really cool.
That's great.
I don't know.
Are you driving? Are you bringing anyone?
I'm driving. No. Well, I am driving with another man down there.
Oh, okay.
No chicks.
Are you gonna hit up any of your babes in la?
All the girls that I know in la, we talked about this.
Oh, they moved to San Francisco or something.
No, no, they all have boyfriends now, so.
Yeah, but that was last time. No, that doesn't mean that they still have boyfriends.
No, they still have boyfriends.
Oh, you're sure?
Yeah, there's girls that I'm friends with, not married, whatever. But I mean, I'll hang out with them, but I don't want to hang out with any girls that have boyfriends. It's too much trouble.
Okay, I hear you.
Why. Why even put any.
I totally understand. I totally understand.
What's up with you this weekend?
Like, you know, I am going to. It's my friend's birthday and we're going to do a spa thing in Napa. So we're gonna do. It's gonna be girls and it's gonna be spa treatments. Yeah. Isn't that nice?
You're gonna drink Wine.
We're gonna drink wine, which is my favorite thing. And I'm. Then I'm going to.
Why do women always have to go to spas? They're not going out there and doing construction on, like, freeways and stuff like that. Those are the type of guys that should be going to spas and going to.
Like, they probably need it more than we do.
My God, I need to go to the spa. I'm so overworked and, you know, actually sitting at a desk all day.
It's true.
It's exhausting. And can I be honest, though? I am not a fan of the group trip. So I actually am sort of dreading it, to be honest.
Why?
Because I don't, like, I don't. I want to be able to escape. Like, I want to drive alone. I want to be able to leave. If I want to leave, I don't want to share a room. I don't know everybody. Like, I don't love it, but it's like a. It's a really good friend's birthday, so I feel like I have to go. But I don't like group just being around that many people.
You drive by yourself.
I totally am. And then I might escape, I might not stay.
That's the thing.
I always need an out.
Like, you know, everyone. When you leave, everyone gonna talk crap about you. Say how you're uber biatch because you had to leave.
I was the first one to leave a birthday party the other night too. I was like, I've got to start the leaving process. And I did. And then everyone else left because it went on too long. Everyone's having birthdays and it went on too long.
How long were you there before you left?
I was. I arrived at 6. It was Sunday night. I arrived at 6. I left at 10:30. To me, that I did my time.
Yeah, that's cool.
I totally think so.
Care about the person. You just leave. I love her.
I just. Four and a half hours of my time was a lot of time.
400. Yeah. But if it's your friend.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's a good friend. Really good friend. She's awesome. Shakti is her name. So, okay, and then. What's this? The.
What's going on with you?
It's really loud and so funny because.
We were just talking to our guest and how there's always audio problems with you. Like for the past seven years.
Right. There's audio problems with me, our guest. Okay, now it's down. That's better. Our guest is. He's was on. He was on, like, the early shows, like, when it was, like, at a kitchen table before I even knew you. She was on it.
I could have just imagined the audio problems. Then I would have just. I would probably commit suicide.
You would have a heart attack. It was not good. No. But these. I always had a sound guy. I always had someone doing the show. But that's why it's so fun that he's here with us. Ethan, we're gonna talk to him in a little bit. Okay, I've got some news.
Okay. What's in the news?
Sex news. This is what I've got for you.
Okay. Kardashian divorce to be turned into reality TV show to prove reality TV is bad is as bad as it is. Okay. So the Kardashian divorce trial is now. I haven't proved anything.
That's why there's all this.
The Kardashian divorce trial is about to get more ugly with Chris Humphries and his lawyer attempting to put the reality TV itself on the stand. Chris and his attorney want to expose the mo of reality TV by proving Kim Kardashian had no intention of staying married to him. So they're going to publicize the divorce in court. Have you heard that?
No, I haven't.
Yeah. Would you watch it? You probably would because you love the Kardashians.
I love it. Yeah. I mean, I guess there's a lot to be exposed when it comes to that. I mean, a lot of stuff will probably be revealed on how the show is shot and things like that. But will the public really care?
I don't know. They're probably over it.
There's already things online that you can watch and see how the Jersey Shore is fake and things like that. The public doesn't really care. They still find it entertaining.
It's fake. It's not real.
Well, they. They. They showed some things where there was this situation where they got in a fight in Italy with some bartenders because the bartenders threw ice at them. But when you slowed down the video, the ice is coming from a different way.
Right.
Other than the. The bar. And they made it up. Yeah, like, they. They made up the drama and stuff like that. So, you know, things like that could be. Could be proven.
Right, right. That's true. Okay. I've been watching it a little bit now, but now my cable's broken. That you fixed that you set up.
Why?
It says no signal. I just got. I just got cable.
No, because there's something that you're doing with your tv that you're hitting. Because when you hit the all on button.
Yeah.
On your.
Yeah. It says no signal.
Yeah.
Yeah. For some reason, I don't know how you did this, but when you hit the all on button, everything should come on.
Right.
But when you hit the all on button on your remote, it shuts off your TV and then turns on your cable box. And then. So when you hit it again, it will shut off. It will turn on.
You figured this out the other night. Yeah.
It will turn on your TV and then shut off your cable box.
Why didn't you tell me this? I thought so you tell me how to.
Because I thought I fixed it. I don't know what you're. I don't know what your.
I don't know what problem is either. So. I haven't had a TV in long time, and I finally got one this year. And it took me a long time to get into watching television. Just not my thing. But lately I've been wanting to and I've been. I've been getting into it and watching like a lot of reality TV shows like the Real Housewives of every freaking county.
Yeah.
And my TV's not working, so that's all I do. Okay, explain it to me after the show.
Yeah, I will. I'm all about.
I thought I had to call a cable company.
No, I'm all about Mob Wives.
I've never seen it. Never seen it.
Of the wives of all the mobsters.
Is it for real though? This?
Yeah. They got black eyes and stuff. It's for real.
Wow.
Yeah.
Okay.
It's no joke.
I gotta watch that. It's on my list. Okay. 10% of us parents have questioned their child's paternity. That's a lot of parents questioning. A company that sells over the counter paternity test says that 12% of men and 10% of women have been in a situation where they've had to ask, who's the daddy?
Because you can't trust them. Women, fellas.
That's. Why are people using protection.
That's why you need to get the home paternity test to see who's who.
Can you believe it? The actual percentage of misidentified fathers ranges from 2 to 4%. Double that in Europe. This is because in the US more and more babies are being born outside of marriage and more couples are living together.
Yeah, man. That's. You know, the whole thing with. That's why it's in the news. The whole thing with the Khloe Kardashian.
That's why did they find out? Is she a Kardashian or not or.
Whatever they're saving it for.
Oh, season eight or whatever.
Yeah, with Chloe and Lamar.
Okay. Oh, so that'd be kind of a bummer to find out you weren't really part of the family.
Not really. Well, I mean, she still has the same. Yeah, she still has the same mother.
Right.
But still.
Keep that from your.
She wouldn't be actually a Kardashian.
Right.
Should be whoever her dad was.
Right, Exactly.
And I mean, if you Google Khloe Kardashian's dad. Real dad. I don't know, man.
Oh, you show me the picture. But any. Everyone.
Yeah.
You'Re not a good judge of it.
Why?
I'll ask our.
You'll ask Ethan. Okay, fine. Fill it up right now. Okay. Okay. So this Valentine's Day, try thoughtful over traditional gifts. An online survey of U.S. adults about their Valentine's Day gift preferences found that while 57% of Americans would enjoy dinner at a nice restaurant, more sentimental ideas, such as receiving a handwritten love note or a home cooked meal came in a close second and third. Other gifts ranked in survey included flowers, chocolates, cologne, perfume, and spa treatments.
So the survey also asked which celebrities Americans would most like to receive a love note from. 34% of men opted for Katy Perry. They want a love note from her.
Really?
That's bizarre. You think they'd want it from someone else? Like they would. And then Taylor Swift was close behind. Whatever.
Yeah. I don't know.
I'd like a love note. People don't write love notes anywhere. Maybe like, love. Like they sext or they send you, like, a quick email. Like, I used to get letters. I want cards. I want emails. I want your thoughts. I want to know what you think about me. Well, how much you like me and how much you love me and how hot I am. That kind of thing.
Just write it down, the whole thing. Katy Perry. I met her quite a few times. She just seems like, you know, you're gonna have to pay a lot of attention to her. But I'll tell you this. I think I told you this story before. What I do love about her. She came by my work and she said, oh, can I use the restroom? So she went and she used the restroom, and then she came back out and she did all our interviews. And then when she. She left, somebody went back into the bathroom and she drew a penis with nail polish on the stall of the bathroom.
She did?
Yeah, she just.
That's like her calling card.
I Guess. Oh, when she's in the bathroom, she.
She always has to go to the bathroom and does like penis.
Is that illegal?
Yeah, I guess so. But it's Katy Perry.
All right, that's cool. That's cool. Okay.
Ever.
That's nice. That's why you like her.
Yeah, I think that's hilarious.
I think that is funny, but it's a little destructive. I like. I'm not gonna have Katy Perry over my house if she's gonna do that in my bathroom.
You don't find anything. I sent you that thing last night and you're like, ha ha. You barely even thought it was funny. I sent you this picture that I found.
I know, I didn't think it was that funny.
It said.
I was like, haha.
It said karma Sutra, like a car. And then it has a picture of a car and then it shows people in the car, like in a sex position. Get it? Karma Sutra.
I get it. But I don't find it funny. Like, I didn't go hot. I learned an lol.
It was hilarious. No, you don't.
I do, I do. Show me. Send me really funny things. Just try to do that.
I don't know what you find hilarious.
You know what I find funny? You know, when I laugh.
Name a funny movie that you like that's not like some cult obscure classic that everyone else thinks is awesome. What? Name one movie.
Meet the Parents.
Hilarious.
The first 20 minutes of that movie, hilarious. You think it's dumb, the rest is bad. I've seen it a hundred times. It's so funny. The first 20 minutes of meet the Parents. There you go. I find that funny.
Any 80s movies?
No, no. I mean, yeah, 80s movies.
I don't know, like what comedies was like the best.
I know. That was a good time. Yeah, like all the breakfast clubs and all that stuff.
Yeah, I'm thinking more like Revenge of the Nerds. Stripes.
Oh, right. Stripes is amazing. Yeah, those were all really good. They don't make movies like that anymore.
Ghostbusters was good.
Ghostbusters, yeah.
Anyways, keep it going.
Okay, I gotta keep more going here. Married sex is predictable, but still good.
A new study by iVillage revealed that 78% of married women found their sex life predictable. Couples with young kids especially related to having predictable sex. With half of women being able to not only predict the course of foreplay with the length of the deed, the location, as well as her husband's go to techniques. That's so true. I'm not even married. I've been with someone for like, six months. You can tell. I'm like, oh, this is what you're gonna do next. This is why you should listen to the show. So you're not predictable. Don't be that guy. Don't be that predictable guy. But that said, the vast majority of women surveyed were happy with their sex life, still wanted sex, frequently had experimented with sex toys, role playing, or spanked their husbands playfully in public. Playfully in public. So it's. It's predictable, but that's what happens. Whatever. Predictable is not bad as long as you mix it up every once in a while, which is what we're gonna be talking about. Sex. How to mix up your sex life, and how to have a good Valentine's Day.
I know. The table here is already getting filled with sex toys.
I know. Isn't that amazing?
That's crazy.
Oh, my God. They're my favorite sex toys. So excited. Okay, we're gonna get into that soon because everyone is probably thinking about Valentine's Day.
It's coming up.
They are, Right?
What are you thinking about?
I'm thinking about nothing. I'm thinking I'm gonna go home and take a bath and masturbate. About that.
Are you serious?
I don't know. What am I gonna do? Go out friends. I'm looking at my calendar. I'm just looking what I'm doing.
Don't you have other friends that don't have any plans?
I'm getting my hair done. I'm getting my hair cut.
Sounds fun.
It's gonna be a good time. I know. I'm gonna go out with friends. Whatever. And I think Valentine's Day. This is what I was saying earlier is it shouldn't just. If you're not in a relationship, it can still be like. It should be a day for you to love yourself.
Yeah.
Masturbation is sex with someone you love.
I'm definitely gonna go and have dinner with a woman on Valentine's Day. I don't know. We'll find somebody.
I think that you should go with me then.
Huh? Why?
Cause you love me?
You're not even gonna pay attention to me the whole time.
Dude, you're the one who's on your phone. Actually, right now, you're on your phone.
Because I'm looking for the freaking photos for cares. No, I want to. I want to get his opinion on what he thinks.
If he thinks Khloe Kardashian. Okay, let's put him on. Let's. Cause we're getting some emails, and he's gonna. This is Ethan imboden. If you're. You know. Okay. A lot of people are listening to the show. You can also watch the show@sexwithemily.com you can see everything that's happening in here. Hi, Ethan.
Hi. How's it going?
Good.
How are you?
Good. Ethan and Bowden from Jimmyjane. Jimmyjane.com if you haven't bought your Valentine's Day gift yet, do that now.
I know you're a huge Kardashian fan.
Tremendous.
Use coupon code EMILY25 at checkout and you get $25 off purchases over $100.
All right.
How about that? Okay.
Is this Khloe Kardashian's real father? It's Kris Jenner's ex hairstylist.
I'm so unqualified to answer this question.
Well, no. Just look at the picture.
I don't find either person attractive.
Okay.
So they're consistent in that. In that regard.
Good.
Ethan, do they look similar? Any. A little bit similar. Yes or no? You're not going to hurt my feelings if you disagree with me? Sure.
Yeah. Big faux heads, big foreheads, and.
Yeah, big foreheads.
Today, that's all I needed from you.
Wait, let me see.
Although, you know, I just. I just realized.
And it's a tough one.
The person who has a big forehead is me. Especially this new hairstyle. I just looked in the mirror the other day. I was just like, oh, my God, look at how big my forehead is. And I had to.
Sexy.
I had a little camera set up like this. Cause we were having a Skype call with our engineers, and I was like, look how big my forehead is. And then I was like, oh, my God, it's like as big as the rest of my.
I didn't think that. I thought it, like, brings out your face. The fact that your hair looks windblown.
I think that my hair needs to be at least as tall as my forehead.
Yeah, I usually notice stuff like that. I didn't really notice it with you. I think it's proportionate.
You know what? This time I do think I needed to see it twice. I do think they look alike, Menace. Oh, Especially in the top picture.
Thank you.
Yeah, I can't wait for season 85 till we find out.
That's cool. All right, go ahead.
Okay. I'm gonna get into some emails right now.
Do it.
I'm doing it. Ready? Dear Emily, I've been listening to your show since about episode 100 or so. You and Menace have done a great job, and I love your frankness and transparency. Transparency the organic quality of your show is truly a breath of fresh air. I've noticed that you repeatedly said that guys shouldn't try to please their new sex partner using the same techniques. That works for their previous partner. I totally understand your point, but do you really think that it's only guys who do this? Women do the same thing. So why do you keep saying, guys, this is a bummer when you do this? Thanks. And keep with the great work. I think you and Menace have created something special here, and it has been a joy to see you to learn and grow over the years. Love, Jerry in San Diego.
Cool. I can't wait to answer this question.
Okay, well, I'm gonna answer it first. Same thing is that it is true that men typically do do the same thing. They're like, oh, she liked it. And I'm talking about. I don't know. When I think about this, I think about oral sex. I think about how women orgasm is always different. Like, you put a hundred women in a room, they're all going to orgasm differently. They're all going to be touched differently. They're going to need different kind of stuff. Right. They're going to need different things. So if this worked exactly for her, like your last girlfriend, it doesn't mean it's going to work for this current girlfriend. Now, I think the thing is similar with men. I do think that some men like their balls played with, for example, and some men don't. I think that. So you know what, Jerry? I'm going to say the same thing then is for men, too. Men and women should all pay attention. Be present with your new partner. Ask what they like. Experiment. Ask questions. Talk about what turns you on. Like, literally. This is my biggest issue is that couples don't talk about sex. So, like, just tell your partner what feels good and don't assume that it is what the last partner liked.
Change out the lingerie drawer. Buy some new condoms.
Buy some new condoms.
Maybe get rid of those old sex toys.
Yeah, the old sex toys.
You have to switch it up.
Can we talk about that? Okay, do.
Oh, real quick. I just want to say.
Yes.
The reason that we don't stress it so much with women, like, getting into a new relationship, because us guys, we are simple creatures. It doesn't take too much to make us happy. So they don't need to, like, find a new move every single time. But every. Every woman is different.
Right.
You know, that's true.
I mean, men are different. So I feel.
I know, but it's not as different. Yeah. Like, I think all guys enjoy blowjobs.
Right? I'm sorry, not all, but a lot.
But there are blowjobs and there are blowjobs.
Exactly.
And then, you know, some female. Some females are not into you going down there.
Right? It's true, it's true. Some women just don't like. I know I have a lot of female friends who are like, nope, don't like it. I don't understand those people at all. But I feel like I gave a pretty good. Like I'm pretty good at oral sex. Performing oral sex. I think I've got it down. And I think that I. You do kind of change your technique when you're with different people. But there is a certain technique that I do over. I think I've got it down. I think I've got it nailed.
That's all I gotta say.
I do. Okay. So anything else you have to say to that, Ethan, what were you thinking?
No, I'm good. I think we covered it.
We covered it. Okay.
Okay. This is about Menace. Dear Emily, I have to make some assumptions about Menace. In the short time that I've listened, I think he's single, possibly looking for someone to get serious with, but has not had a long term committed relationship in his adult life. Whether that describes Menace's situation or not, I would agree that any guy in that scenario generally could give himself a better hand job that the date of the week or short term girlfriend could. Oh, it's a hand job debate.
I've had longer relationships than you.
Not true.
I've lived with people. What are you talking about?
I've never lived with anybody, but I've had two and a half year relationships.
Two and a half year relationships. I've had two three year relationships and then two one year relationships. And I've lived with three of my partners.
Yeah. Mistake, huh? Was it? Mistake? Why do you move in so quickly? Why people shouldn't move in so quickly. They're like, oh, I love you, let's move in.
Yeah, you should. You should move in with each other. The people that say that, oh, you gotta separate things. I'm not gonna live with people.
You get their mails still. You can't forget that they live there. Cause you find their sock behind the bed.
You sound like Kim Kardashian right now. Where she didn't want her new husband to move in boxes to her house.
I saw that episode. I saw that episode.
That's totally how you're sounding right now.
Yeah. I wouldn't want.
I wouldn't want what did they say about Kim Kardashian when she was saying that?
That she was crazy? She was out of her mind.
I want to hear about hand jobs. I know we got to go back to the Kardashians.
Okay, so here's the deal.
Here's the deal. Just to break it down real quick.
We got to break down the hand job. This has been going on for three years.
This whole hand job thing just got.
Brought up is because we've been having this debate for over three years now that I stated that, cool, a woman can give you a hand job, Fine. But I'm just saying that a woman cannot give you a hand job better than you can give a hand job to yourself.
I don't know if I agree. I mean, there's definitely something different about being in control and not being in control, and being in control has its advantages, but not being in control and having a little element of surprise. I mean, there's something to that.
Exactly.
Aren't you excited about this other person being.
Yeah, no, I think it's cool. I think adds a layer. I think it's awesome. A woman is giving me a hand job, but I'm just.
Getting the same pleasure. The point of my argument is that I can give a hand job better to myself than a woman can give me, no matter. No matter what.
Right. And I disagree. And I think I was trying to bring handjobs back. That's how it all started. I was like, you give a hand job at high school, and then you move on to blowjobs, and then no one's giving hand jobs anymore. But hand jobs can be really fun and sensual, and you use lots of lube, and you can use both hands, and you could use your mouth, and it's just a nice thing to add. So I was just encouraging women to start giving hand jobs again. I thought it'd be fun. But then we just got, like, hundreds of emails about the hand job debate and became. It grew out of control.
Guys never really give up on fingering, right?
No, no. Some do. And I'm pissed at those guys because I like that. I like that. So I'm gonna finish the email because it goes on to state, however, my scenario is that I have been happily married for 23 years, and my wife could give me a better handjob than I could give myself any day.
Oh, yeah.
She knows exactly how to touch me.
How long? So if you've been together for 23.
Years, she knows exactly how to touch me. How long? Where. How much pressure, when to vary the pressure and to get me off. Besides, she can freely use two hands in ways I can't. And she can reach or approach me at many more angles than I can myself. I wanted to throw Menace a bone, no pun intended, by saying that I would agree that generally a guy could masturbate himself to orgasm faster than any partner could. However, because my wife knows the right techniques that work for me, she can get me off as fast as I can. Thanks, Paul.
Thanks, Paul.
You've never been with anyone for that long.
Yeah. Not 23 years.
You probably haven't gotten a hand job.
I don't know if I would want to wait 23 years to have hand job perfected.
You could do it in a lot less time.
I just like that your listeners are paying such close attention.
I know.
And they're sending in such detailed feedback.
Oh yeah.
And advice to you, Menace. I mean, really, you know, the listening audience gets some benefit, but really we're here to help you out.
Yeah, exactly. Why?
I just know what I like.
You need some help with your 5v1? I just had a friend call it 5v1 the other day and I never heard that before. I like that.
5V1. When you meet a hand up.
5. 5 versus 1. Sort of. Yeah. A hand job being. Oh, 5 versus 1. Kind of like a maybe. That's. That's.
Yeah, I get it. I like it.
It sounds kind of sports termish.
It is. Sounds kind of sports termish. I can't even believe the hand job came. I thought we killed the debate, but it came back, so. Feedback at sex with emily.com what do you think about hand jobs? Do you wish that you had more hand jobs? Do you wish that women gave you more hand jobs? If you're a woman, how do you feel about them? I just think you use lots of lube. There's like methods, twist, turn the whole thing. Mm mm. What?
Well, no, it's just. It just goes back to. You think I'm weird because I like the things that I like. I don't think I have the statements that I. I have. And you know, you try to conform me to what? What you think is cool and awesome. It's just, I just think.
I think we need a new book, which is Masturbation by Menace. Because it's possible that menace has worked out some stuff, some techniques that we all need to know.
Maybe you do have some techniques.
Well, here it goes into another thing too. I'm like, why do women try to teach blowjob classes? They don't know A woman doesn't know how a blowjob feels. Gay guys should be teaching women. And they do.
You guys do.
I've not attended and they should.
I think a woman trying to give a blowjob class is ridiculous.
I think that's so wrong because women know. But if you've given a lot of blowjobs and you've had a lot of success, I think that women do know how to give.
Well, I hope if you're giving a blow job, you get a success no matter what which way you're doing.
Yeah, I think that women can teach. Definitely. I think I've taught. I have taught a class. Not like, not, not a formal class, but I've helped friends and interns, for example. Okay, this is a good one for, for Ethan because. Well. Well, kind of. I'm going to read it right now. Dear Emily, other than a cock. Wait, did we.
We didn't have to say anything about that. We just talked about. I'm just wanna make sure we gave him love. Thanks, Paul. Okay, other than a cock ring, is there anything else that I can use to help me last longer in bed? Any natural herbs or anything over the counter? Russ. He's from Brooklyn, New York. He's a Premium Friends with Benefits member. And I just want to say if you want sex with Emily three days a week, you become a Premium Friends with Benefits member. Go to Sex with Emily dot com. There's lots of perks and fun things happening there.
I don't know why none of the listeners listen to me. Over the counter tequila you can just buy whenever you want. And it works just as good.
But I want to just say that I want to show my favorite. My favorite cock ring out there. Okay. I brought my own.
Ah, yes.
Okay, this is. This is Jimmy Jane. If you're watching us, you can see it's the iconic ring and the reason why. Cock rings are great. And I will get to Ross's question in a moment, but it's because I love. I love that it can fit over any stuff. One fits all sizes, right?
That's right.
And it vibrates so it hits. It can hit the woman's clitoris or wherever it turns her on while they're having sex. And it can keep you. It can keep you hard.
It can help to constrict the blood flow.
Constricts the blood flow. That's how it works specifically.
And these are great. And I think it's. But there's a slightly different question being asked here. Although I know this may solve one problem. Which is that for a lot of men, they may want to take a pause and say, hold on, just stop moving for a moment. But this would still be providing stimulation because it would be vibrating if you were going to take a pause in your own motion, at least there's still some motion going on, some sensation on the. On the clitoris. But I think, you know, I know, honestly, I know very little about sort of the natural herbs, over the counter, et cetera. There are those numbing creams and so on.
I don't know if that stuff works. I mean, I would say I always talk about Kegel exercises for men. Like, that's what your doctor will tell you if you go like Kegels, like practicing your Kegel exercise, which is your PC muscles, which is those muscles that you use to start and stop the flow of urine. And you. That's. There's no fancy pretty way to say it, but if you practices, you tense and relax those muscles and you do it like a few times a day, you can do it anywhere. That will help you. That can help you stay harder, longer. You should also. You could always go to your doctor for a checkup, see what's going on there. But I have an app called Kegel camp that you can get in the itunes store and it helps people do Kegels, men and women, they're not just for women.
I think a lot of it's in the head and I think that there's. If you get into this loop, I can imagine this loop of psychology of I don't want to come yet. Oh, my God, I'm so excited. I really don't want to come. And it's just. It's sort of. It's feeding off of itself and.
Exactly.
And I think it's probably. I don't know if it's something that Russ, you know, if he has a long term partner, it's the sort of thing that you can actually just address outright and sort of address with your partner. That could be very different.
I think you do have to talk about it. I think you're absolutely right. A lot of it is psychological for men. And it is true that you do become. That you become like, obsessed with it. Like, I'm gonna. It's gonna happen and it's gonna happen, and then it keeps happening. So there's. It also there's the book called the Multi Orgasmic man, which I always recommend, and it has great techniques in there for helping men stay harder, longer to overcome that. It's a great book. What do you. Okay. So.
Hello, Emily. I am a dedicated podcast listener of your show. In one of your broadcasts you said you had a handful of penis pumps and to email you to request one. I've been married for 16 years and would like to try one to see how it works and see how it may spice up our sex life. If you still have any, please let me know. Thank you and keep it the great show. Say hello to Menace and the interns. Thank you. D. White, Ohio. D. White, I do have. We had a sponsor a few years ago and I have all these penis pumps at my house and they're taking up a lot of space. So I said I would give away some to listeners.
Are you gonna send them one?
Yes. Okay, D. White, we're gonna email you, get your address. We're gonna send you a penis pump.
Okay, that's cool.
That's what we got for emails.
Do you have any experience knowing if penis pumps actually work?
Have you ever heard about penis pumps?
You know, I also have no information about penis pumps. Although I suddenly have this image in my head of your place, which is kind of like I just saw Hoarders for the first time. Just because I was at the gym and I was running. I couldn't even hear the sound because this never works.
And.
And I'm looking at the inside of people's houses and it's horrible and whatever. And I'm imagining is your house kind of like Hoarders, but it's all just sex paraphernalia.
Yes, exactly.
That is literally is all sex toys.
You kind of spoiled it because the cameras are going to show up to her house actually later.
The hoarders. Exactly. Can we just talk about Hoarders? Since I just started watching tv, it freaked. I texted you Madis, didn't I? Yeah, it was. I got nauseous, I got scared, I got afraid. I was like, I wanted to go home and throw everything out that I own. Like I'm afraid because it's so scary the way those people live with all that crap in the house.
Rats.
They're hold the whole bottom of their house are like.
Yeah. And there's cats that are dead.
Oh my God. There's like dead. Oh my God. That's a terrible show. I don't really want that happen. So yes, I'm gonna friggin send him penis pump today because I wanna get three. I wanna get that shit out of my house.
You know what's funny is actually there was like an episode of Friends where I think Ross brings he goes to a chick's house. And they open up the door and she is just as messy. And he's like. He's trying to like make out with her, right?
Like get down and things are falling all over the place.
Yeah. He's like effing and he just runs out.
I think I remember that one.
Do you think you can take like a whole bunch of sex toys and penis pumps to Goodwill? What would happen?
Maybe a recycling center.
We need to talk about that in a second. About what you do with use. Can you use sex toys again with different partners? Like, it's kind of weird sometimes to do that. But this is what I want to say about the penis stuff and what I do know. The penis is like every. It is a muscle. And if you exercise.
Can expand in some way. There are proponents. There's a guy who wrote a book called Exercising the penis and he was on my show a few years ago and he says you actually can do all these exercises that grow your penis. And the penis pumps actually engorge blood so it makes it appear bigger, I think, like briefly, but I'm not sure the long lasting effects of the penis pump because I don't have a penis. I would have tried it out. Menace wouldn't do it.
No, no. You wanted me to try some other. It was like inches for charity or something where I put my. Basically put my penis in a vice or some crap like that.
Yeah, some vice grip. You wouldn't do that for me?
No.
Whatever. Okay, let's talk to Ethan more now about. Let's talk about. Let's talk about Valentine's Day coming up. So what do you. What do you guys say over there? Jimmy Jane, he's got. He makes amazing toys, let me say, Ethan, award winning products. They're beautiful. They are different than anything else out there on the market and we love them. And I love the massage candle of the iconic ring. I love the form. All the form whatevers. We're gonna get into that in a minute. But it's a great gift. If I got that as a gift, I would be like so psyched if I got one of these toys as a present.
Can I. Can I ask you real quick? Like, when you're dating somebody, I don't know, you have boyfriend, girlfriend, married? All right, before. How long were you doing? Were you doing.
Were you already working with the company beforehand or.
Yeah, I started the company a long time ago. I started the company. Well, I started working this in 2002. I was not. I didn't have a consistent girlfriend. I was dating Prolifically.
And then. So how was that conversation?
You know, I think it was sort of self selected for a certain type of person and woman perhaps who wasn't gonna be put off by that. But what I've come to learn is that you can't look at somebody from across the room and say, that person is into this kind of sex and that person's into that kind of sex. This person will or will not like somebody who is now devoting, you know, 80 hours a week to working on developing vibrators and other sex products. Yeah, you can't. You just can't see that coming. And so it definitely. I think. I think there was some self selection there, but I didn't really. I didn't really notice it that much. Okay.
I was like, pretty focused.
But yeah, it definitely came up. It definitely came up a lot. Yeah.
I was just wondering if you were nervous the first time. You're like, so. Yeah. By the way.
Oh, I totally would beat around the bush. It would take forever for me to get around to talking about.
Yeah, it's cool. I just always want to know people's stories on how. Because definitely with. With, you know, Emily, you always run into that thing. All I do is sex. Radio show.
Yeah. I don't even talk about it now. Well, because for me it's different. Like being a woman and you see a guy, like, he might not even. He might not be attracted to me. He might not want anything to do with me except for the fact that I have a sex talk show. So I must be either really good in bed or really bad in bed. And they just want to know. So I tried to.
How is that different from a guy who just has tons of vibrators at his house? I mean, it seems directly analogous to me.
Yeah.
That's why I never really understood their true intentions. Do you love me for me or just for the.
I might have slept with you for like a Form 4 or something, you know, back in the day. So I. But I just started telling, like, I actually try to avoid the conversation when I'm dating as long as I can what I do for a living. But it's hard. Just Google me or whatever. Go to my website.
So how long you've been doing this total where you actually had your first product.
So I started looking at the category in 2002, so 10 years ago, which is crazy.
That's crazy.
We met soon after.
Yeah, we probably met right around that, actually. And then in 2003, I got money from friends and family. My mom kicked down wow. Yes. And in 2004, outside investment. And so the first products hit the market for holiday 2004.
Really?
Or Valentine's Day 2005. And since then, it's just been. It's been something of a whirlwind and create new products. Changing it up.
Yeah.
And really helping, I think, I hope, to help transform an industry that was pretty antiquated in many respects.
It was. I mean, a lot of the sex toys were, like, not made of good products. And they have, like, porn stars on the COVID You're like, why would. I'm a box? You know what I mean? They're, like, cheesy. Like, his sex toys are like pieces of art. Like, you can leave them out on your table. You don't have to, like, hide them.
Look how friendly this is.
Look how friendly.
Yeah, that's form, too.
And it's charged like an ipod, too, right?
Yeah.
It has a little docking station.
It has docking stats, I think.
I feel like I already know you because she talks about the products all the time. They're always laying around.
That's true. Yeah. I feel like I know these products inside and out.
Yeah. And they are so smartly made and charged. The way you charge them and the way, like, I do, I have mine sitting out in my form, too. Like, sitting out. And all my interns do, too, thanks to you.
People say you are what you eat. I think I am what I create, which means I am a vibrator.
You are a vibrator. Oh, let me touch you. Okay, so that's amazing. And you've also won awards for all your different designs with different things. Herman Miller, Nike, Motorola, Ford. And then on sex toys.
Yeah. This was not the first time.
I appreciate that you're using your skills towards sex toys.
Well, that's actually. I think that was sort of the motivation was a lot of people were using a lot of skills toward new cell phones and toothbrushes and furniture and cars and footwear, whatever it was. But nobody really seemed at the time to be applying any of those same disciplines in this area.
You were like, the first one. And then everyone's copying you.
Ah, they're. They're. They're following their own path.
Okay, so let's talk about Valentine's Day, because it's really soon. So if you have not done anything yet, what are some. Let's talk about. First of all, we can talk a little about using toys. And we've talked about this before, but, like, what would you like? There are still are some guys out there. I can't believe they exist still. But there are men who feel, or maybe menace is one of them threatened by sex toys, that they are a replacement, that they're gonna replace you. And we've talked about this before, but, like, how do we. How do we integrate that into the relationship? How do we get men to understand that, like, it's an accomplice. We love you, too. We love your penis. It's an accomplice. It's your bff, I feel like. Right.
Yeah. I think that the hurdle, I think, is getting to that first time trying it. Because once you've tried it for the first time together, the understanding of how that might go is very different from that initial fear. It's just like anything afraid till you actually go for it.
Till you actually try it.
And I think that getting then to that first time is made a lot easier. If it's a product that's really approachable, that's maybe focused on external stimulation for the majority of women say things that you probably say all the time.
It's fine.
But the majority of women require clitoral stimulation to achieve an orgasm. And so the best place to start for a vibrator is kind of be an external vibrator. What that also means for the guy is that now you're not sort of competing from a penetration standpoint.
Exactly.
It's not something that's phallic. It's a very different sort of proposition.
We're just gonna hold on our clitoris and you can still pound away. Let me just put it bluntly.
Yes.
Right.
Let the vibrator do the hard work.
Yeah. You don't have to be down there with your menace.
You don't have to be there at.
All for, like, two minutes. Menace. Like, what do you do? Two minutes? Oral sex.
Oral sex.
You give, like, two to three minutes.
It depends on the lady, man.
Yeah, exactly.
I'm telling you.
I know what you're saying. I know what you're saying.
The special ones get extra attention. Not so special, eh? Not so much. That's all.
Okay, so we've got this. We got this from your blog, do it yourself, Valentine's Day. So these are some. This is some suggestions. Eat like royalty by cooking for yourselves. That's a good idea. Instead of making the dinner and having the reservation, head to the farmer's market, see what looks good, then ask the growers about their favorite recipes. Build up from there, incorporating a few seasonal aphrodisiacs. Yeah. Fennel, blood orange, and of course.
Or just do what you do. Just go to Whole Foods and just grab the meal.
Exactly. That's what I would do. That's what I would do. I don't cook. But if I. I always date people who can cook.
I think the broader point here is that this fits under is this idea of ultimately, what is Valentine's Day about?
What is it?
And it's this opportunity to have this special moment with your special someone. Right. What that probably doesn't look like is a bunch of red roses and a box of cheap chocolates and a prefix meal at the local restaurant. Because there's no faster way to sort of demonstrate how little you've thought about this than to walk down that super well traveled path.
Exactly.
It's really all about, like, what's unique between the two of you and how can you play into that. And one way of demonstrating that there's a little bit of forethought is going and actually making a meal.
Right.
So that whole idea of putting some of yourself into it. Your time. Yeah.
Emily, I've never cooked, but I will. Are you gonna make a meal for this chick on Tuesday, Wednesday?
No. Probably. No. If it was my girlfriend, then, yeah, probably make a meal.
I'd much rather stay home, make a meal, or have someone make me a meal or even order in food than go to a restaurant. That's how I feel. And it is more. You're right. It is so easy just to get the roses and whatever. But that's what some women are down with, that they're, I want a reservation at the best restaurant. So that's how. We don't know. Just like every woman has different orgasms. Differently. Every woman wants a different kind of Valentine's Day.
Yeah.
Don't you think?
Yeah. Some women are super simple. Just like, oh, just, you know, to show that you recognize the day and you care and just give me some flowers and I'm good. Or some chicks, you just gotta go all out. It's crazy, right?
And they'll be really upset. Have you ever had that? Even when you've been with someone and they're like, you probably always did it, right? No. Some girls are like. They're like, I didn't get this. I didn't get that. I never care. I'm not the girl that cares.
Yeah. I don't think I would have dated that person.
No, probably not.
I mean, I've told you before, I took a girl once to New York for Valentine's Day, but it wasn't something that she was expecting, you know, just.
That was nice.
Yeah. Just to have fun. But I feel really bad. Back in high school, my high school girlfriend.
Because I'm a dumbass, we get together, like, a week before Valentine's Day.
Yeah, that's dumb.
So I didn't really, you know, we weren't together forever, so I didn't really expect to do too much on Valentine's Day. Just, you know, the basics. Oh, my God. She just went all out, and I felt so bad.
Aww.
I felt so bad.
You didn't do anything.
I didn't really do anything because it was like, we're together for a week.
Right.
Did you at least masturbate so she didn't have to give you a handjob?
Yes. I showed her how much better I can give myself a hand job than she could give to me. That was her gift.
Sounds like a very warm cherry sort of experience.
Okay, wait. There are some of these things that we were gonna talk about that I really. I liked. The.
One about the cheaper Valentine's Day. Like, if you don't have a lot of money, what you should do on Valentine's Day.
Yeah. I think that's where you were. Right in here.
Oh, was I. Was this it?
Or maybe that's this one.
Your penis doesn't cost that much money.
Go local. Oh. Explore an area of town. You don't know. Check into it. Check in a hotel in the area.
Yeah. I realize after it's a great surprise.
Tip, a different bed is a great place to try different things. Yeah, I think that's true.
Hotels still might cost a little bit to get a decent hotel.
Stay at a friend's house. Do you have any friends out of town, see if you can stay at their house for the night?
No.
Are there any friends who have a vacation home? That kind of thing?
Yeah, I have tons of friends that have vacation homes.
I do.
What planet are you on?
So, yeah, some things to do. Because people like you don't. You know, I feel like that if you can, you can do something very heart felt for someone. And it doesn't have to be like. As long as you plan something. Like, have a plan. Don't just be like, I don't know, Plan something to do on Valentine's Day.
Plan ahead.
Plan ahead.
Be decisive.
Exactly.
The New York move is a good one. That's.
I mean, that is a good one.
That doesn't fit under the budget category.
Yeah, that's a. You know, but that's definitely. That was a girl I was dating for a long time.
That's a bold step.
Yeah. But Definitely. If I was only dating her for a couple months, I'm not taking her to New York.
But there's that whole. There's a whole study done around happiness and so on. And a lot of it has to. Our happiness has to do with limiting our options, actually. And so somebody making a decision like that and saying, like, if you guys sat down and had a whole debate, like, oh, let's go to a city, we could go to New York, or we could go to Montreal, or we could go to Chicago, or we could. It would just. Would not be nearly as much fun as just Menace laying down the lawns in New York.
Well, you're a man. You got to take charge. I mean, not a. Not a dick, but, like, women like that when you make the decisions, because I don't know if you ever done this before. It's crazy. You ask a woman what she wants to do, and she. She says, oh, whatever you want to do, she can't ever come up with the answers, but she knows the answer. She knows what she wants to do, but she won't tell you.
I don't know those women. Menace dates those women. Do you know those women?
Yes.
Yeah, I've come across those. But you know what? I've also. I've also been that woman on occasion, where you just want to be. You just want to have. You want the other person to be so happy.
Exactly.
And you don't realize that, really, all you guys need to do is make a fucking decision.
Yeah, exactly. Be decisive.
That's why you're talking about the group getaway. That's that same nightmare. It's like, you need to go away. You're going up to Napa with, like, 10 people or whatever, and it's like, where should we go to dinner? This is probably all planned out in your case, but then it's like 10 people negotiating where you're gonna go to dinner.
I hate that. I don't even want to talk about it. I just. Yeah, I want it to be done and decided. And it is true what you say about happiness. I think that's so true that we have so many choices today and so many distractions and so many things that it's just. It's. It doesn't make you happy. It really doesn't. To have more choices. Like, I just want. Narrow it down, narrow it down, narrow it down. So get creative. It is the thought that counts. If you're gonna give a card, make it yourself. If you're gonna give flowers, select and arrange them. Make a card. I used to have guy. We were talking about this in the office earlier. I had a guy once.
He wasn't exactly an artist, but he thought he was. And he painted a portrait of me naked. He painted a port. He gave me a naked portrait of myself.
Wow, that's dumb.
Okay, so that. That falls under a different category also covered on our blog, which is this. Which is a sort of don't. I don't know. We had, like, a smart term for it, but it's this sort of don't be selfish, like, who did you really want?
No, I couldn't. I couldn't show my mom was coming.
To town a naked portrait of you.
I don't know. I finally threw it away. Like, I kept. Because, of course, I'm not a hoarder. But, I mean, I felt like I couldn't. I couldn't get rid of it. Like, it was behind my back. I never hung it up or anything and didn't even look like it was. Like, he wasn't a good art. He didn't know what he was doing.
Abstract or something. He probably put a lot of time into it.
I know. So I would. It was behind my bed for a while, and then I finally threw it away. And then I had a guy make a sculpture of me once.
I date artists or whatever freaking weirdos that you're dating.
And it was a sculpture. And then I had a little heart that was hanging.
Oh, God.
Wow. I know the awkward one, which was along those lines. But it was like, I knew this woman, and then I met her boyfriend and her boyfriend, at some point, they had a party at their house, and he's like, come check this out. I've got these great photographs of my girlfriend. Look how beautiful she is. And she's just totally naked. And so I'm looking at this friend that I know naked.
Now. That is so awkward. Yeah. And she was cool with you?
No, I don't think so. I mean, she came into the room and kind of played along like she was, but I think it was.
I know a lot of women who have naked photos of themselves in the house. I know several women who do that.
Just like. Just up.
Just up. Like artistic. Whatever. I don't think I would do that. No.
Weirdos.
Weirdos. I have weird friends. You think?
Are the naked woman pregnant? I don't want to see that on your wall.
Naked woman pregnant.
Yeah, That's a hip thing to do.
Oh, that one that I have. That's not hip. My friend made that.
Oh, you.
Oh, my friend took that Photograph. The one in my house.
Oh, no, I wasn't even referring to that one.
Oh, I thought you were referring to the pregnant woman.
Oh, at least that chick has cloth clothes on. But yeah, the ones that are, you know, covering their breasts.
Oh, right.
And they're pregnant. I don't want to see that.
Right. I have a photograph with my friend took of a pregnant. Isn't she pregnant? Kind of.
Yeah, she is pregnant.
She's pregnant.
She's walking down the street, like in Manhattan or something. Yeah, that's kind of a cool picture.
It is a cool picture.
It would be hotter if she wasn't pregnant. But whatever.
Whatever that happens. Okay, so what else for Valentine's Day? Let's talk. So I. I think. Okay, so make it fun. Oh, this is your gift wizard. You can make it fun by. I love your gift wizard. Yeah, Yeah, I totally checked it out. So your gift. Explain that your gift wizard on Jimmy Jane.
So we added all these new items to our site over the past couple months, and we realized that it's just a plethora of options. And so in order to make that have a sort of different, more fun interface and like, oh, I'm going to look at edibles. I'm going to look at chocolate. Instead of that, you go to this, the gift wizard, which is our sort of interactive little tool, and you basically, you select who it's for. Her, him, us. And then whether it's serving the naughty or nice range. And that's a slider. Right. And then sort of a price range, and it like, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. And then it pops up.
I wish they had that in everyday life. Like, I want, like, a gift wizard for everyone.
Like, I'm.
It's a good concept.
And I want something salty and something.
Exactly. Just help me make decisions in life. I would love a gift. I would love, love, love, love, love that.
It's like a decision maker, but it's cool. It's a great way to sort of check out the. Check out the.
Check out the stuff at Jimmy. Dana. Okay, so what about foolproof? Fooling around? Please your woman, please your man.
So this was a set of ideas for.
You know, one side of this that you're looking at is sort of targeted toward her and one that's targeted toward him. I think that people get wrapped up in making things maybe more complicated than they need to be.
Right.
So, for instance, this Valentine's Day is on a Tuesday. So Tuesday doesn't offer that many great opportunities, unless you're gonna play hooky, which Is actually a great possibility.
That is a great possibility.
You could drop in and just pick up your man, or vice versa. Your woman for a nooner. Totally out of nowhere.
Right? That'd be nice.
You know, just a surprise, right?
Surprise him for lunch and have sex. That's a great idea.
Or better yet, even bigger surprise. Just take advantage of the weekend before because everybody's focused on the Tuesday. Would never expect that Sunday is actually gonna be the Valentine's Day that you're gonna celebrate.
Surprise. Or.
Right.
Well, it's the weekend, so just jumped the gun completely.
But.
And massage. Would you say there?
Yes, massage.
I'm so into massage lately. I think that massage is such a good. I think that couple should massage each other more. Especially if you don't. If you. If you're feeling disconnected from each other. It's a great way to connect again. And to use.
It takes a lot of effort, though. That's a lot of effort.
You've never used one. These are my favorite thing. The massage candle.
It's like the woman always wants to. Wants a massage when you're also exhausted and tired, you know?
So you are always exhausted and tired, though.
I know. I just found out the other day that you can only live without 11 days without going to sleep, without getting some sleep, and then you die.
Have you not slept because you seem, like, really tired today.
No, no, no, I'm good. You. You just handed me the candle.
Candle, yeah. It's amazing.
This is something that you've been talking about how. How many years? I love it. No, seriously, like, since I remember, like, doing the show together. You have talked about this candle. Like you love it.
I love the candle because. Okay, it's my favorite thing. It is amazing because it is. You want to explain it in your technical. In yours. I love this. I think it's the best thing for couples, for massages. It smells amazing.
Okay, let's explain how it works from the beginning.
Okay, so from the beginning, this is the afterglow massage oil candle. And the idea is, well, one thing that's important to know here and to realize people love candles and so on. Great illumination. Very flattering. Everybody looks great in candlelight, right? Number two, scent actually bypasses our sort of processing or cognitive processing in our brain and goes straight to the limbic system. So you basically react to it immediately. And if you had that experience of smelling something, and then immediately a memory pops up, it's because it was so important as part of our survival perception. But anyway, it's a very fast way to Sort of trigger and shift mood. And so it's true.
And your sense. That's one of the things that I do love are the scents of the candles that you get.
Well, it's really important not to get, like nasty cinnamon, whatever scents or overblown fake vanilla, and instead to get something that's more suitable to you and so.
Illumination scent. And then there's this tactile component, these candles. A lot of people have tried playing with wax, which is hot and exciting. Hot.
Like literally Ricky Martin video.
Like the Ricky. I didn't see that.
But that's a famous scene where people pour wax on Ricky Martin.
Are you surprised that I don't know that?
With his chest exposed.
Oh.
God damn it. All right. But that, that, that scene pretty much explains what you do with this candle.
That explains. Except.
Yes, except what's up for you? It's a special candle.
It's special because it's all natural ingredients and it's all body safe in the actual formulation of the wax base. And so essentially, it's not really a wax. It's a solidified oil. And that oil is made up of all sorts of botanicals and so on. Long story short, when it melts, it melts to warm temperature, but not too hot.
Not like a real candle will blister you.
Exactly.
You can pour it straight onto the skin and then it never re solidifies it. Basically, its melting point is body temperature. So it'll just stay nice and smooth and it's actually great for your skin. So a lot of our customers will buy them for massage and then realize, oh, I'm going to use this as body oil every time I get out of the shower. They light the candle when they get in the shower. They use this as body oil when they get out. Anyway, so we've got all sorts of different fragrances. This one happens to be bourbon.
It's the massage. It becomes your massage oil, your massage lotion massage oil that you.
It is your massage oil.
I love the scents.
And for lazy people, you know, like menace or others or people who are just weary at that moment, when one person wants a massage, the other one also wants a massage.
Right.
This combined with the massage stones, and I don't have one here, but these are these ceramic massage tools so everybody can give a fantastic massage. And a lot of women also complain it's really hard on my fingers. It's a lot of pressure. And guys are like, can you push harder? But it hurts.
Oh, so you.
So you use a massage stone with.
The massage oil that Is so cool. I don't think I have one of those. What's the problem? We're gonna have to. We're gonna have to work on that. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Anyway, so that's cool. And then they also have other little sexual purposes as well. So they're sort of dual function.
Right. They're just amazing. They're like my favorite things. Right. I guess I do talk about them all the time. Ad nauseam.
All the time.
Do I drive you crazy, mama?
Yeah, but not about.
But like in a loving. In a loving, loving, loving way.
Other things. So how many products do you have now? This is like not an infomercial for.
Jimmy Jane, but love each other.
I just wanted to add you, like, how many different items have you come up with? I love people like building companies like this. I love hearing the story.
The story.
So you start off with one, and now you have. Yeah, I started off with the first one.
Yeah. Actually, this was basically. The first was the little something vibrator. This is the little chroma which came just after, which is more accessible in price point. Because the little something. This vibrator that I designed was actually the first one was 24 karat gold. And that was really just to explore how different a vibrator could be from what people were expecting. Little chroma is basically the same shape, super simple, very compact little cylinder. And this is again for that, primarily for external stimulation.
What we're looking at right now is it looks like kind of maybe a tiny tube, and then it's rounded on each side.
People say it looks like a cigar case, which I don't really.
Oh, it does.
It does look like a cigar case. That's exactly it.
And it's not intimidating. And it would be mostly for clitoral stimulation.
Yeah. And it's smaller than he is and so on. So it's.
Hopefully you haven't been around to where I've been. I've had some. Yeah, I don't want to get into it, but yeah.
Anyway, so it started there, and then once we had a great response to that, we just kept pushing further and further and pushing really more innovation. So it's a lot of technology that goes into the form line of vibrators. These other ones I showed you form two before the sky and so on. And that's really technology.
Employed in a way that it makes. It keeps your life really simple. And you can do all things you want to do without really thinking about it. It's not technology. Like, wow, look how complicated this vibrator Is. And so it's innovation that you get to feel, but you don't have to really learn about sweet.
Sweet. Got that? Okay. Well, I hope that everybody has a happy Valentine's Day.
I hope you have a happy Valentine's Day.
I do. And I don't feel. I don't feel like. Like I said, I think Valentine's Day is something. If you. If you're in a relationship for Valentine's Day, I think that you should take a moment, don't stress it out. Don't be like, I gotta. Don't think. Like, take a moment and just really think about your partner. Think about who you're with. Think about something that you could do that would be really special, really memorable, and really sweet. It doesn't have to cost a lot of money. It could be writing something. It could be just be going somewhere special that is. Doesn't cost any money, but just something that is different, out of the ordinary. I would say I'm pushing for. Because I don't think that, like flowers and candy and dinner is. I just think there's more that you can do if you're in a couple, if you are single. Menace always talks about how it's a great night to meet people because everyone's out of the bar drinking because they're single. Haven't you said that?
Yeah.
Valentine's Day, go for it.
Don't sit at home and be sad that you're not with somebody, Lisa. You know.
Have an opportunity to maybe meet somebody.
Right? It's a good opportunity to meet somebody on Valentine's Day. Exactly.
It is.
And. Or go home and buy yourself something, like something sweet, something special, something that.
Makes you feel loved.
Love yourself.
Yes.
Masturbate, that kind of thing. Okay, that's what we got time for. If you want to join our Valentine's Day contest, you still have a few days left. You go to sexofemily.com all the information is there. Follow us on Facebook and Twitter. Sex with Emily and. Yeah, happy Valentine's Day and thank you so much, Ethan and Bowden from Jimmy Jane, it's jimmyjane.com. check out all his cool stuff there. And Mendes, happy Valentine's Day to you and everyone. Have a great weekend.
We'll see you next week.
See you next week.
Thanks, guys.
Bye. Oh, thanks for listening. Oh, wait, you're listening to Sex with Emily. Thanks for listening. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com thanks for tuning in to Sex with Emily. One of the reasons you're able to listen to us for free is because.
Of the incredible people at Good Vibrations.
Good Vibrations is a sex positive company based in San Francisco with an amazing website. I got my very first vibrator from Good Vibrations, so I hold a soft.
Spot in my heart for them.
They have a huge online store@goodvibes.com you can find literally anything on there from toys to DVDs to games. Just click on the Good vibrations banner@sexwithemily.com and enter GVshipMily for free shipping. So check it out.
You'll help yourself and you'll help keep.
Sex with Emily free, just like it should be. Thanks for listening. I promise your sex life will improve.
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