SWE: Threesomes

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Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes. They call Them in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.

A girl's gotta have her standards.

Oh, my. Do women know about shrinkage?

Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean? Like laundry? It shrinks.

Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me?

Oh, my God, I feel so good.

Being bad feels pretty good. But, you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you will get all of your sex questions answered. You'll learn more about sex and relationships, and everything in your life will get better. Yeah, I just am eating this chocolate.

Chocolate. See, this is what's fun about being. Hello, everybody. That's listening on XM Radio and online at sex with emily.com. but we also have another home Stitcher radio in San Francisco. And they let us use use their lovely studios. This is packed to the brim. To the brim with chocolate chips, cookies, sodas.

That's why I like coming here.

Whatever you want.

And they're a great app that you can listen to your. You can listen if you download the Stitcher app for free. It's the easiest way to listen to Sex with Emily or any podcast that you like from your smartphone.

Yeah.

And they have really great candy. If you're ever in San Francisco and you want to come to their office and raid the refrigerator like we just do every day.

Yeah. And you just download it and search Sex with Emily. Pops up, right?

Pops up. We're the top thing. I think you just put in sex even. And we come up. Cause we are so frigging popular. It's been great doing the show. We are. I have to tell you, you know, I've been doing this reality show on Monday nights on Bravo TV at 10pm it's called MisAdvise. We've got a lot of new listeners, which is amazing. So welcome to the Sex with Emily family. It's been great from hearing from you. It's really easy. If you go to sexleyliving.com you can just email me any of your questions to my website. We try to get to all your emails. We're getting so many of them. And if we don't, when we do get to them, we will email you so you can listen to the show. And sometimes we post your questions online. I answer Them, but lots of different ways we can get your information across and we will get back to you. So I read all your emails and I love hearing from you, so thanks for that.

And we have another announcement.

Oh, my God.

What?

We have another new home. We're just going all over the place.

We got another new home.

Tell them T Radio v dot com. That's T Radio v dot com west coast time. Every Tuesday at two o', clock, we're going to be doing a live radio show with, like, five cameras. Back in the day, we did, like, one camera that was only on Emily. About Emily. All about her.

Yeah. Now you can.

This one is, like, totally interactive. You can call in.

And you can actually Skype in.

You can Skype in. Be on video.

Yeah, you can be on video.

And T. Radio. V. Radio and video. So that is every Monday at 2:00 clock Pacific.

Yeah. And if you can't tune in on at that time, there'll be a video that you can watch on.

You can watch the entire hour of Madness. And I in the studio. You can see the whole studio. It's very interactive. It's really cool.

Yeah. We just did a test run. I think it went really well.

I think it went well, too.

I want to talk to the people. And they loved it. They love you.

They do. Good.

They thought you were amazing. But they totally agreed that you would be a train wreck without me.

Oh, stop it. I'd be a train wreck without you. Menace, you have to throw in that Dig.

What?

How would I be a train wreck without you?

I'm just saying.

You're just saying that because you want to feel good.

No, I'm just saying that I, you know, I just keep everything in line.

And Menace likes to give me a compliment and then take it away because Menace thinks that it gives me too many compliments. My head's gonna get super big.

Yeah, wish it would.

She's like, compliment, compliment, compliment, dig, dig, dig.

All right. Thanks for having me.

You're amazing.

You can do everything by yourself.

No, I love.

Would just take off if I wasn't here.

Menace, you add a lot to the show, and I love you and I'm so glad you're here and I'm glad everyone's here. Today's show, we're gonna be talking about threesomes. Because, you know, I'd say in the last. There's been four misadvised episodes. Threesomes have come up two times. It's coming up. I just saw next week's episode. Cause we get it. A few days ahead of time and another threesome season situation comes up. So I thought I should give people tips on threesome.

You are pretty sick.

Apparently. I am threesome chick as far as I know a lot about it. And yes, I've had one or two, but not five. Even. Not even five. I'm not kidding you, but I feel like that's the number one fantasy for men. A lot of women are curious and how do you get into it? What are the rules? How do you make it happen? We're also going to be reading the emails that you sent me with your questions. We've got some sex in the news. We've got just a lot of stuff going on. Today's show is brought to you by Good vibrations. Go to goodvibes.com use coupon code gvmilyship and you get free shipping. But the easiest way to do it is to go to my products page at Sex with Emily and you'll see all my favorite products from Good Vibes. And you click on it there and you can go to the they have a special Sex with Emily page. And it's like 30 products that I love. So I always suggest the vibrating ring. Cock rings are amazing. I think I was the first person to ever say cock ring on national television on the first episode of Misadvise. And I just. I think I should get some kind.

Of metal Will find the people that make cock rings.

Yeah, they send me cock rings. I mean, I said it. I said it on television. I don't think it's ever been done before.

Have your people. You have a whole staff at this exosomy headquarters, which I put up on Instagram the other day.

Yes.

The search white menace on Instagram. One word. You can see it. You have a whole staff there. Tell them to call the cock ring people and let them know that you agree.

I'm a pioneer in cock rings.

Yeah.

I was talking to a new client yesterday and they were like, do you like cock rings? I'm like, do I like cock rings? I am the cock ring queen.

That should be in your bio.

I'm gonna wear one around my head. First person. I'm gonna stretch it really tight and put it around my head.

First person to say cock ring on television.

Yeah. And I always wanted to be the first at something, you know, to make a real, like, difference in the world. And I think that was one of them. So anyway, goodvibes.com, you can get tons of toys if you're products, toys, videos, whatever you want. We Had a party on Monday night. Menace wasn't there. He was glaringly missing. But it was a screening party for Ms. Advise that we did actually with Good Vibrations because Good Vibrations was featured in the epis. Because I attended a kissing workshop. During the episode, I had to make out with a dude on camera in front of people so people would learn how to do better kiss. And we taught that class at Good Vibrations. They have a store too, and an online site.

People had nice things to say about you about that on the Internet.

What'd they say? Like, can't believe you did that.

They said you were kind of a floozy.

No, they didn't. They said, I can't believe that you had to kiss that guy who was twitching the whole time. So the guy that I was kissing, his name's Reed Mihako. He's a well known sex educator. Nothing wrong with Reed Adore Reid. However, he has a particular.

A particular issue.

Trait.

Trait.

Trait.

Yeah, when he kisses, when he gets turned on. He said he gets a turned on. Tourette's is what he called it. This is like three seconds before we made out, he said to me, I get this turn on Tourette's. So we start to kiss and he starts shaking violently. But like, it wasn't like in a scary way. I mean, it might have looked creepy, but it was.

It was an actual no.

So then I'm kissing him, I'm trying to focus on kissing this guy and he starts shaking. And Tourette's. It's a funny episode. Go watch it. It's on demand. I mean, I think it's on demand or it's on some stations. On demand. It repeats every day. Misadvised. Check it out.

Well, not to bag on you or anything, but. Oh, you're going to take this the wrong way.

Probably.

Bravo TV.com if you click on misadvised and click on the videos, there's a video right now of you and I. Oh, God.

Should we talk about that?

And I just want to let you know right now I was not twitching.

You were not twitching, but you did get a boner. So it's a good thing I did.

Not get a boner.

A preview to next week's episode we get. So basically what happens is Bravo. I have not seen the episode. I don't see them ahead of time, but they send them to me. Three days. I don't see it like weeks ahead of time. I see it like four days ahead of time because I have to turn in my Bravo blog, which you should all read on the Bravo site. And I Facebook like it. Mendes and I watched the episode together, and what happened was I came back after the day, after the workshop. We did a show, and I was like, menace, I did this workshop. I. I taught people how to kiss. He's like, well, what'd you learn? And one of the main tenets of being a better kisser. Cause I don't know if this happened to you. It's happened to a lot. I know a lot of people. They say, you know, this person's great. Everything's wonderful. But we don't kiss well. We don't connect. Our kissing isn't very good. Can you teach someone to be a better kisser? And so what we taught in the workshop was that one of the tactics was. Is to kiss somebody the way that you'd like to be kissed and then switch. So let's say. So I was doing this with Menace. I said, menace, let's say you and I were dating. I would kiss you. I would show you what I like, and then you would turn around, kiss me, and show me what you like. So then we know, and then we can make an, you know, amalgamation of our kissing together.

Yeah, but I was an amazing kisser, but you, not so much.

So Menace says to me, okay, let's try it right now. Cause he's been dying to kiss me.

Oh, yeah.

So I got up off my chair here with my. During the show, and I make out with Menace. And there's a video of it on site on the website now. Oh, we should put it on our Facebook.

Ross Bravo TV dot com. I put it on my CEO. You don't go to my Facebook. I already put it.

You know. You know why you boycott your Facebook page?

Why?

Because you are like. You don't just let people post shit. You have to. You. You have to accept it. You prove it.

If I do. Only with photos. Only with photos.

Okay, so if I go, yeah, white man. Okay, fine. Doing it.

When we get back, you can write. Yeah, I've already posted. But Menace is mean because I kiss.

Him and then he wipes his mouth like he just had some broccoli or something that he didn't like. And that was rude.

Wow.

Wow, That's.

No, I'm sorry.

Whatever.

But yeah, check it out, check it.

Out, check it out.

And then totally put on your blog on sexdalemy.com.

I'Ll do it now. I'll do it now. I'll do it today. We need to. Yeah, we're uploading our blog every day.

For all the, you know, old school listeners, that's a moment that you've been waiting for forever.

Exactly. People don't realize that men and psy have been working together for a long time. And we got, we've a lot of people are newcomers now, but they don't know the history which actually we have a lot of our episodes up on the website. We've got like 150 shows and every week we're putting up a throwback Thursday episode. So actually today you're going to get a new episode from the past. But the point is, Menace, people write us. They're like, why don't you guys just hook up already? Why don't you guys just be together? You and Menace should be together.

They've been forcing this upon us.

So Menace was excited. He saw his in and he made me kiss him.

But I, I told you, only two people in my life, ever, the people that I've dated and made out with is like, I felt a really, really strong kissing connection. Like, perfect.

But do you think if we were alone and there weren't cameras around that you would have found that I was a better. You would have enjoyed my kissing better?

Probably not.

Madness. That's mean.

I'm sure it would be amazing.

I'm a good kisser. No one's ever complained.

Why guys are not gonna. Yeah, guys are not gonna say anything. They're happy. They're kissing.

Well, they always come back for more.

I know.

How about that?

Well, if you're putting out, of course.

You know, I don't always put out. Oh, that's one of our sex in the news things today. How women should wait for sex. That's one of the top questions we could ask.

Oh, do you know what?

What?

Are we gonna do this or not?

Yeah.

What are we gonna do? A live show after the airing of the East Coast Misadvised on Bravo.

When?

Monday at 8pm West Coast.

This Monday.

This Monday. We can do a live one hour after show.

Oh yeah. At TV Radio V. Yeah. Yeah. We should do it. Let's do it.

I think that'd be fun. But you would have to really break down the episode and talk about the other girls.

I will. I don't say bad things about them. I love Amy and Julia. I mean, but I would critically, I'd be critical.

Yeah. Cause I got some things to say.

Yeah, I'll bet you do.

So I love you, Amy, but you.

Know, she loves you. She's like, oh my God. She goes, lmfao. You kissed Menace?

Okay. If people don't know there's another girl on the show. Her name's Amy. Cute girl, you know, nice rack, nice body, nice body, all that stuff. But it's just, she's one of those workouts freaks. And I think the only. The only people that can date people like that are people that are just fanatics with working out too. It's not gonna work out with her, like trying to date somebody that's just not like food conscious.

Right.

And going to the gym, all that stuff. She can't date anybody that doesn't do that because it's just gonna be a constant thing with the guy. He's gonna be annoyed by it, like, because you're always gonna think, oh, I don't look good, or I'm gonna look fat and blah, blah.

Right. She's. Yeah. I mean, and. And you were like eating Taco Bell in front of her. She'd be horrendified. Horrendified.

Her panties would be horrendous if that.

Happened wet, I'm sure. So. Yeah, that's Amy and Julia's also on the show.

Yeah.

We're getting a good response. It's been fun.

I know. The viewership was up.

Way up. Tell all your friends. Everyone watch it right now or DVR it. Okay. We've got some sex in the news.

Do ya?

Yes, I do's. I don't have anything celebrity, so if we. Oh. Oh. You know what I did not mention in here is. We have not talked about yet is the Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes divorce.

What do you think?

I think it's not a surprise. She married him young. She was totally swept away by him. But if you look at his history and his past, like, he doesn't seem like someone who's like a safe bet to marry to date Nicole Kidman. It's always weird, the divorces that he gets into and the sexuality.

Yeah. Actually, I didn't know about his first marriage before. Nicole Kidman.

Yeah. To someone. Another.

She was another famous Mimi Rogers, I think. Yeah.

Yeah.

And she's actually the one that turned him on to Scientology.

Oh, interesting.

I was reading up on it because they mentioned it on one of the extra shows that I watch. That's how I get. All my education is from television.

That's great.

It explains everything, but it makes me go research. Yeah. So I went and researched and I found out that she was the one that turned them on to it. And she was actually. Him and her were only married for two years.

Yeah, I read that. I did know that and then Tom and Katie and then they say Katie's gonna be like the next it girl and all this stuff. Cause she's like single and Tom Cruise's money and she can live that life.

I definitely think so. She. People bring up all the movies that she was in. She was in this one movie called Go. Yeah, I love one of my all time favorite.

I'd love to see that.

They never give credit to go. When they give out the.

Maybe she's ashamed of it because there's like drugs in it or something.

It's just like very indie type.

I love to Go. I loved when it came out. Yeah, that was a really good one.

And you don't know, there's some sex scenes in there, people.

Is she in it? Does she have sex?

No, but there's a guy that has a threesome in the movie.

I don't remember that.

Yeah, the Irish guy, they go to Vegas and he crashes a wedding. And then he was able to take two bridesmaids up to his hotel room and he had sex with them.

Go. And go.

Yeah.

Oh my God. I don't remember that. Came out like 10 years ago, didn't it?

More than that.

Really. Okay, whatever. So we'll watch it again. Okay. Sex in the news. There's a hot. What do you think about this? There's a new no orgasm sex called Carezza. There's a curious new trend in couple therapy. Sex without orgasms. You might have already been having that kind of sex, but Matt Cook says his sex life with his wife is better than ever. But he never wants to climax again. He practices Kariza or Carezza. K A R E Z Z A. It's a form of intercourse that doesn't focus on orgasms as the big prize. In fact, people who practice are urged to avoid them altogether. It creates a deep feeling in a relationship that's very close to describe. Much deeper than conventional, conventional sex.

Dude, do you know what's crazy?

What?

Another guy in the movie Go talks about this.

Shut up.

Swear.

How do you remember this from 20 years ago?

Because I'm not crazy like you. I can remember.

I got lots of stuff in my brain, so. They say it's useful for couples even in the honeymoon stage. They offer this to couples who even together in a month, for even for a month or so. They say they wake up every single morning and they're not thinking about genital stimulation. They're snuggling. They're holding and breathing with eye contact and flow. And it's very conscious. So what they're saying is that it's a way to strengthen marriages because they can become closer without actually having intercourse. And then he talks about the biochemical things that happen when you have an orgasm, that you kind of get a hangover because the dopamine in your brain spikes at climax and then it crashes. So they say that the brain scans of people climaxing looks like that of a person shooting heroin. So if we avoid orgasms altogether, it'll keep couples closer. I'm not ready to give up my orgasms yet. If ever I do get. It's kind of like a tantric sex kind of thing that there are a lot of schools of thought that you shouldn't just focus on the orgasm.

Well, it's easier cleanup anyways. That's a benefit.

Oh, thank God. I hate all that cleanup. Okay, there's a dating tip.

You don't like to clean? In general, I clean.

I did my sheets yesterday. I've never cooked in my life. I did make a frozen burrito for my friend last night. Evil.

Go over to Emily's house. Swear to God, all there is is ice in the refrigerator. Like I don't know how this woman.

No, I don't have ice because my ice makers broken. So I really. I don't even have anything. I just like. It's like condiments. I've never cooked. It's so bad. I know, but I'm working on it. Okay, So I.

That's how you stay so thin.

I'm so thin cuz I have no food. I starve. I'm not on purpose. I just. Well, you.

You're not gonna like go get food or anything, so.

Well, I do live by a Whole Foods, but it's so expensive, it just kills me. You go in there for one thing, it's like 50 bucks.

You gotta go to the poor man's Whole Foods.

Which one's that?

Trader Joe's.

Oh, I'm going there today. I am going there. I love Trader Joe's. Cause I'm going away this weekend to my friend's cabin.

Who's your friend?

My ex boyfriend, the baby daddy.

Who's the group of people that are gonna be there?

I'm going with some friends. It's my friend's birthday.

Break down the friends.

Who are these, Charlotte?

I don't even know who are these people to you?

They're bestest friends in the whole world. And a guy that I've been dating and some other friends.

Guy you've been dating?

And we're sleeping in my Ex boyfriend's bedroom in his cabin. Oh, is that weird?

Is your ex boyfriend gonna be there?

Yeah.

He'S my ex boyfriend from years ago.

The current guy you're dating, we're gonna.

Have sex in his bed. Is that weird?

Wow.

What do you think?

I'm thinking if I was the current guy that you're dating, I would be saying you should go have a dated.

This other guy, like seven years ago. No, they love each other. They like art. They email. No, it's good, honey. I think it's healthy. I think what I'm representing.

Healthy?

That my ex boyfriend's my best friend and watches my dog when I'm out of town every five minutes? Yes. And that he loves my boyfriend. He not my boyfriend, but. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. The guy that I'm dating. I don't like that word. Please do not bring that up again. I'm gonna say please.

Let's just.

Can you cut that out of the audio?

Oh, my God.

He's not my boyfriend.

I know.

In fact, he's been mad at me lately.

Ex boyfriend, right now.

He's been mad at me lately.

I wonder why. Because now he's been watching a TV show where you make out with every single guy every episode.

Yeah, that hasn't been helping because I kissed my ex. I kissed my high school crush two episodes ago.

I kiss you, you kiss some polyamorous slut. Oh, dude. People tell me the line of the whole episode is, what? We talked about this yesterday. I go, people are going to quote this.

It's not sex with Emily. It's sex with everyone. That one.

No, no, it's about polyamory.

Oh.

I don't know. Tell me it. What?

We went over this for like an hour yesterday.

It's the polyamory Scrabble.

Oh, bring it down for everybody. So Reid, when we were talking about this, was not actually in the scene, but I quote it, that Reid likes to be penetrated anally while playing Scrabble.

So what's it called?

I don't know. What did we call it? Penetrative Scrabble.

Yes.

Yes. Dude, I'm sorry. Penetrative Scrabble. It's hilarious. That's what he likes, though. But, you know, everyone's got their thing.

That turns them on playing penetrative Scrabble.

Apparently. Read.

How do you even play that?

How do you focus on the letters when you're being penetrated and anally? I don't know. I'd be like, word, and then I'd forget the word.

I mean, when you get the word, you get penetrated.

I'm not. You know what? I didn't get into the details because I didn't think it was anything I was gonna be playing anytime soon.

There should be an app, a sex with Emily penetrated app.

I think that's not my next app.

Anal.

Anal app. An anal app. God. Anal sex comes up in the show a few times. And threesomes.

Wow. Only in your segments too.

Only in my segment. Mom. Sex with Emily. It's not gonna come up with Amy or someone. Right? Okay, so here's a dating tip. Keep your pants on, ladies. In a relationship, it's usually safe to say that women has far more to lose than the man. Sorry, gents. Until you can get pregnant. This is true. So if you want to protect your heart and save your precious time, here's some cautionary advice. So this is for women about keeping your pants on. Number one, keep your pants on until these elements are in place. You're dating each other exclusively. Keep your pants on until you're exclusive. This is just a suggestion. This is something that Amy would say, but like, there are a lot of women who sleep with the guy really quickly. They assume they're going to be monogamous. They make all these assumptions. They get, they get attached to the guy before they should because they had sex. So if you want to protect your heart, don't have sex until you guys are exclusive. Your primary dating purposes are in alignment. If you're sincerely seeking marriage and kids, don't go there with anyone else who's not on the same path. If you've not yet had that conversation and you don't know the other person's long term plan, keep your pants on. What do you think about this? Do you think a woman should ask you first if you want to have kids? This is for women who are on a track to get married, settle down, have a family, you know exactly what you want. Maybe this isn't for a 23 year old, but maybe this is someone who's 30 or who's looking for the right guy and keeps falling into relationships with the wrong people. This is kind of like just wait, just wait to have sex until you find more out about this person.

Yeah, I, I mean, if you're asking these questions right away, you're gonna scare off the guy.

I know. But then guys want to have sex on the second date. So what do you do? I would be like, I know there's, it is slippery slope because I do.

Not think women make sure you know, you have really Protected sex.

Yeah. Well, that's the next point. You have the check sheet, right? Have you been tested? Has he been tested? You gotta ask these questions. So. And remember when high school, we had lots of fun with our pants on. Sex is actually much more satisfying when you wait a while for it. And it's along the lines of lovemaking than cheap, casual sex. It's worth the wait.

Yeah. If it's a girl that I really like, then I'll wait.

You'll wait? Yeah. How long?

It depends on how much I really like her.

I mean, not like six months maybe, but maybe like a month, two months. How long do people wait these days? Let me know. Feedbackily Morse.com I mean, as you get.

Older, you know, girls get a little bit sluttier. They're willing to, like, hook up with you on the first day.

Really?

It doesn't. Doesn't really matter.

What do you mean, older? Do they. They lose their inhibitions.

They do. They just, like, yeah, they'll bang you.

Whatever, and then go get dinner and.

But if it's somebody that I really, really liked. Yeah. I'm willing to wait. I mean, I'm not gonna wait a year, but I'll wait. Maybe I'll wait. Like, if some. If she has, like, some issue where she really needs to date somebody, then I'll wait. If I'm exclusively dating her and she's not hanging out with anybody else.

Right.

And I'd probably maybe wait till, like, six months.

Oh, my God. Really? To have sex?

Yeah. As long as she's only hanging out with me.

I can't believe that. When are you gonna start meeting these people that you're. You want a relationship, don't you? Or no, you're good now.

Do I want one?

Yeah.

Yeah, I would have a relationship.

Yeah, I want you to have one.

I want a strong, healthy relationship.

Me too. I would only have that.

I don't want to go out and, like, bang a bunch of people. Do you know why?

Why, honey?

Because it's easy for you as a woman. You can just go. I'm not saying this is what you're doing. This is what you're doing. But it's easy for you as a woman to go on a bunch of different dates with a bunch of different people. As a man, it's not as easy because it costs a lot of money.

That's true.

It's expensive.

If you're old school like I am, A man should always pay for the first date. So if I'm hanging out with a bunch of different chicks. I'm going on a bunch of different first dates that I'm paying a lot of effing money for.

Can't you just take them to some of your free movies and stuff?

Unless you're just hanging out with a bunch of whores. It doesn't matter if you're taking them out or not.

Right. The whores just want to make sure you.

Yeah, the whores are not the ones that I want to, you know, have a relationship with.

Right. It is expensive. But there are things you can do on a first date that are not expensive. Go for a walk on the beach, go to the park.

Really?

Sorry. You would never do that.

Do you know it would be not expensive at all if a girl made me a dinner. You should make somebody a dinner.

I should make somebody a dinner. In fact, I should. I'm not.

When's the last time you cooked something?

I've never have in my life. Not one thing ever.

Are you serious?

I've never turned on my stove or my oven or whatever either.

What the f, man?

What? I cook. I've never cooked.

I saw the episode with your mom and she was cooking stuff.

My mom was. My mom. I know she was cooking. She said something for you. Okay. My mom's theory is that she tried to teach me how to cook when I was growing up. And she'd be like, emily, come in the kitchen. And she said I was on the phone the whole time. Like my entire childhood I was on the telephone. And I wouldn't.

Who are you talking to on the phone?

Friends. Girls. I was like 12.

What are you talking about?

Boys, probably.

Really?

Yeah.

At 12.

She says I was always on the phone, always with my friends, and I was not interested in learning to cook. And she said she tried to help me. I don't remember that. I don't remember her ever saying, like, learn to cook. But it wasn't like a fun thing. My parents were divorced. My mom's in the kitchen, stressed out. Like, I really want to go hang out with my mom, make some chicken. So now, as a result, I don't know how to cook.

But did that affect your brother? Did your brother.

My brother doesn't cook either. No one cooks in our family. And my sister in law kind of cooks, but my mom cooks. I know it's weird. We're a weird family, but we've got other skills.

Like.

We'Re pretty.

I mean, your brother, I mean, don't speak for your family, okay? Your brother has a lot of skills.

He's got mad skills.

Mad skills.

My brother's gonna come to New York. I'm going to New York. Okay, so I'm going to New York.

And he halfway invited me.

You're welcome to come.

I'm not going anywhere.

We'll be on the Andy Cohen Show. Watch what happens live on July 23rd. And if you're in New York and you want to come to our party, let me know. Email me.

This is how Emily invites you to things that she doesn't really want you to go.

Oh, stop. What?

This is what happens.

What?

She goes, oh, New York, you should totally come. Blah, blah. I go, oh, yeah. I actually have a plane ticket. I can go to New York. I can fly whenever I want. Oh, but you probably can't take work off.

Oh, I see.

That's how you saying how you don't want me to go.

Because if you came, I would be so happy. You could stay in my hotel. If you don't. If you promise not to try to kiss me again.

What?

I'm kidding. But no, but you could. I would love you to be there. Menace. If you can take off a day of work. Come on. Monday the 23rd to New York.

Ms.

Advised screening party. It's like two weeks. Honey, I always want you there. I just don't know you to ever take off on Monday.

I should fly out that Monday.

Don't doubt me. That I don't. That I don't.

What time's the party?

7 to 10.

7 to 10.

And then we go and watch what Happens live. And I'm allowed to bring two people. And you could be one of my people.

What? Are you serious?

Totally. Think about it. I'm gonna.

Seriously.

Okay, table that for after the show. We can talk about it. Okay. My last text in the news story, Jane Fonda says I have a great sex life. She's growing old like a fine wine. The famed actress is not taking her later years lying down. Or wait, maybe she is. The thrice married Oscar winner told the UK son that her boyfriend of roughly three years, a music producer, has shown her true intimacy, which she absolutely wanted to discover before dying at 74. I've never had such a fulfilling sex life. Jane said. When I was young, I had so many inhibitions, I didn't know what I desired. And I think that's true. I think the older women get that. They definitely. They definitely enjoy sex more. They enjoy sex more readily. You learn your own bodies. And I love to hear that she's boning people at 74.

She was just recently on the Kathy Griffith show. Really, Griffin?

Really?

Was she good or whatever her name is?

Yeah, she was really good, actually. She seemed a lot more reserved than I thought she would be.

Oh, really?

Yeah. Versus she was on there with Kelly Osborne. Kelly Osborne's mom.

Oh, okay.

Why can't I think of her name right now?

Osborne.

Osborne, Right. Yeah. And Sharon. Sharon. And I love Sharon Osborne. I don't know why, but her, Sharon Osborne, and Kathy were just, like, going crazy and just, like, being super sexual. And it was weird because I thought.

I should be there.

Yeah, well, you should totally be there, But I thought that. That Jane Fonda was a little more reserved.

Oh, interesting.

But they have, like. Do you have that. That famous photo of. Are you seeing that famous photo of Jane Fonda where she got arrested?

No.

Yeah.

I mean, years ago for protesting.

Really hot. Yeah. For protesting.

Yeah, she was hot. She is hot. She was totally hot back in the. Back in the day.

This is before, like, they started going out with, like, sexy pictures of her, like, everywhere. Oh, this is like, just her arrested in her 20s. She looked hot.

Yeah, I' she was, like, an activist. Totally. Okay, we can move on to some emails. We love hearing from you. You can write me@feedbackilymorce.com or. Easiest way is to go to sex withelmily.com and just use the form on the contact page and send me your questions and I will answer them. Please, please tell us where you're from. We want to know where you live. You can change your name. We don't care. But it's good to know your name, where you live, and how you listen to the show. Do you listen on your computer? Do you listen on your phone? Do you listen on your Apple TV?

Do you listen on Sirius XM?

SiriusXM? Are you listening on Extreme Talk XM 165 right now? Tweet us. Sex with Emily. And menace is white. Menace.

Yeah. And if you're listening on stitcher, we have, like, so many ways. Sex with emily.com youm can't even avoid.

If you, like, tried not to listen to sex with Emily, like, it wouldn't happen because it's so easy right now to listen.

Make sure to check us out Tuesdays at 2 West coast time. Tradiov.

Yeah, you can watch it on your.

Computer and you can call or your smartphone and you can call in, and.

You can call in and talk to us. Type in, like, live.

See your face. We can see your face.

We can see your face. And you can see our faces. Crazy. You better be cute. It'll be fun. Okay, so emails. Dear Emily, why is sex such a taboo subject? All of humanity has to do it. It's totally normal. If we all do it, then why is it so taboo? From Kyle. Kyle, that is a great question. And it's something that I run into all the time in the world. And the reason why I started the show is because I believe that especially in America. I'm not sure where you're from, but we live in a contradictory, repressed society where sex is everywhere. Like everyone's thinking about it, people are motivated by sex, but yet our laws governed and the way people act are. Are very repressive and very negative towards it's. Sex is still taboo. And so what I try to do on the sex family show is break that down and make it something that just normal. Like we can all talk about sex and relationships and, and it's. It's such important information to get out there because there's no, there's not a lot of smart sex talk shows and, and ways for people to get this kind of information. So like either porn stars or porn. But I'm just trying to educate people and I don't know why it's so taboo if that's what everyone's thinking about. But we're trying to break down that barrier here at the Sex with Emily show.

That's what you're trying to do. But you say that. I'm not trying to do that.

No, you are. You.

I try.

Yeah. I just say we. We at the sex on the show, we.

I know, but sometimes you say every piece of advice that I give out is a bunch of malarkey.

No, I didn't say every piece that you give out is malarkey. Just some pieces are malarkey. Okay. Dear Emily, I'm in the middle of watching misadvise and you make him a statement that really hit home with me. You are answering a question about monogamy and why you don't like monogamy. Saying, because I don't know that many happily married people that really hit home with me. I'm currently in my second marriage and I'm not happy. At times I think maybe I'm just not that marrying type, if that type still exists. In fact, I blame a lot of it on the possibility that I just always picked the wrong guys. But now I'm playing with the idea that maybe I just don't fit into the monogamy mold. Coming from parents who are very conservative and who've been married for 30 years, I've always thought that was the life I wanted. Now I'm not so sure. I'm married to a man who I thought was the perfect man for me. The problem is I'm unhappy. And I don't know if it's just me. I'm just not the. I'm just not the married kind or if it's just a relationship. How do I figure this out? What is this species idea? And how do I figure it out if monogamy is for me? Ugh. I desperately need to help to figure out if it's me or the relationship from Jessica. Wow, Jessica, this is a really loaded email in a good way. Now, I do say on the show that I think that monogamy isn't for everybody. And I think I talk a lot. You know, last week's show on Misadvised was all about polyamory, people in open relationships. But I want to know, Jessica, what I got to say is, you want to know if it's the relationship or if it's you or if it's monogamy. And I want. I'm thinking this is you right now. I think that it's not about the guy. It's not about what you choose. Monogamy, not monogamy. It's kind of like where you're not happy right now, and I want to know, are you not happy with yourself? Are there some things that are going on in your life that are. That you might need to work on? Like, are you not loving your job? Are you feeling like you're not doing enough things that you had set out to do in your life? Like, I'm wondering if you're just not in the right place for a relationship or if the reason why monogamy isn't working for you, like, because I don't. I don't have all the information, but are you saying monogamy is not right for you because maybe you want to have multiple sexual partners? Maybe you're not satisfied sexually with this guy because you didn't say here what it was you. You thought he was perfect for you, which I think is the first fallacy. We often meet people, really, we think, oh, he fits everything that I want. I check it off on paper. But a lot of times we just. People end up with the wrong people. And I think that maybe you might need to pull back and do some. Just some in some introspection, maybe some therapy would help you right now. Therapy is a great way to figure out what you want. I wouldn't say, go ahead and divorce this guy, it's your second marriage. Try to make it work. But maybe you need couples therapy, or maybe you need to start with individual therapy and figure out what you want, the hardest task that we all do on the planet, and what we're really lucky. We're lucky. We can all figure out exactly what kind of relationship we want, what kind of life we want, and we can make that happen. But we know when people do not spend the time getting clear. Like you said, your parents, like you said, Jessica, your parents were married for 30 years. You thought that was your only option. You thought, I want to be happily married for 30 years, just like my family. Because we often do what we see, what we experience. And so I think that maybe, you know, maybe you've been had these messages and you just need to pull back and do some self exploration.

What about her current relationship?

I don't know. They might need some therapy. She said she's very unhappy and she's not sure if she's the marrying kind or if it's just a relationship. So I would say that those are two really important, important things. I would say that it could be both. It could be one or the other. It could be a little bit of, you know, whatever. I'm not sure. So I think that you guys maybe come some couples therapy. Does your part. Does your second husband know that you're unhappy and why have you tried to work on the issues? Relationships are about compromise and communication and talking about these things. And if you're not currently talking, does he know you know that you're unhappy? Then you're not going to go anywhere. So I would say little couples therapy. I'm telling you, I say this, but it's so true that I have seen.

If not hundreds of couples enter into couples therapy. And it has either saved the relationship or end the relationship, but either way, it fast tracks your issues so you can figure out what is really going on. Because you have a third party and you go for a month or you go for two months, see this person, and I think you'll really get to the bottom of some of these issues. I say a therapist, you can maybe get one through health insurance. They have free clinics.

How many therapists are you currently visiting?

1.

Have I ever seen more than two? I have seen more than two.

Spilled.

I don't think I. I've been in therapy for years. I was, and then I stopped and now I'm back again. Yeah, yeah. How many therapists do you need? I think you would need a lot.

No, no, no.

You'd need a whole roundtable.

What are you talking about?

I'm just kidding.

I know my issues. I own my issues. You. You say that they're not true. The ones that you have.

I think I've worked on a lot of my issues. I'm working on more about work stuff right now in therapy. I think my issues are pretty. I think I've got my relationship stuff figured out.

Somebody that I really want to talk to is coming up in the new episode of Misadvised. People should really watch it.

Okay, well, who?

That guy that Julia talks to.

Oh, you like him. The relation to the love. The happiness coach.

Happiness coach.

I want to go talk.

I like what he said.

I know. What did he say? Exactly? We can't. I liked it too.

We watched it, but you should really watch it. People should watch it. Because I actually used to be around somebody like that when I. My. My early years of broadcasting.

Right. Really positive.

This. Yeah. This guy that I know, he passed away, but he had 28 grandchildren.

Wow.

Right? He was married twice. He did so many things, and he had a lot of life experience. He could talk his conversation. He could talk about a necktie and you'd be riveted by this necktie conversation for 45 minutes. But he was just so positive in building people's self esteem and making them feel so good. You got to be around people like that.

I know. I agree.

I was just actually reading on Twitter the other day that.

If you're in a negative relationship, then you're pretty much doomed. Like, they said that your breakup rate was 80% if somebody else in your relationship is just a negative person.

It's true.

I believe that's their vibe.

You know, it's funny that people are even attracted to people who are negative all the time. But they are, maybe because they think they can fix them, make them happy.

Yeah.

And you can't change the person you're dating. Emma.

So there's this girl who is actually doing a show on T. Radio V. And her. Her message, she's all just about being positive, right?

Yeah.

Her radio show is something that I would never listen to in a million years. Right. But since I see her energy and how positive she is, I'm sucked in.

Wow. Did you hear it? Did you watch it?

I watched it. Yeah. Yeah.

What's it called?

Her name's Cecilia. It's like Lost in Translation or something like that.

I love positive.

She's like, from. I. I could be wrong, but like Brazil or Argent. She's from Argentina.

Okay.

Her like, vibe is so positive that I'm just, I just can't get enough.

Is it a happiness show? Like, how to be happy.

Positive?

She's like, because, you know, news is. If you, if you flip on the news or just go online, it's just all negativity. It's the most negative news stories. You rarely see anything that's positive.

I know.

You know, and then you bring in all that negativity into your relationship.

It's true, believe me.

I've. I've dated girls that are just like, downer, doom and gloom.

I know. I don't have friends like that. I don't. I don't have friends like that anymore. And I don't, I don't date like that anymore because I just need to be around positive people. It makes you more positive.

Yeah. You date somebody that hates their job, all they do is complain about your. Their job.

It's like. Or their family or their friends.

I just don't want to.

Or their boss. I hate that. Yeah, don't date those people. See, negativity, it's going to bring you down. So don't do it.

I'm just saying, I know there's a lot of things that you got to fix, and you can't just float around and think everything is positive and hunky dory and you know you're gonna change the world and stuff like that.

Right.

You know, not to, you know, don't be lost in all this, like, trying to be positive type thing, you know, you do have to, you have to.

Work at it, though, because our brains do not default towards positive thoughts. Like our brains default towards worry and negativity. And so it really takes, like, conscious effort to. Every time you have a negative thought or worry, you have to flip it around and think something positive. That's like cognitive behavioral psychology. And it works. I've had to work on that in years. I used to be more negative. Yeah. Yeah. Can you see me being negative? You've seen that. You see me freak out and be anxious. Yeah, but I used to be more negative.

I go on phases.

You seem like you're in a good space now.

Yeah, I think I was in a really good space. I started getting negative just recently about other things, but I caught myself.

Good. See, you gotta catch yourself at it.

Because I started getting really depressed about, like, things and why things weren't going well. And nothing that had to do with sex only or anything here.

Right.

I was just like. And then I just had to check myself and I said, you know, What? Even if the worst thing happened, right? I'm still gonna be okay?

You're gonna be okay? Yeah. You're gonna be fine. Yeah. That's what you gotta tell yourself. Positive things. Positive just not. And not Polya, not polyamorous. Pollyanna. Ish. Positive, like, oh, everything's great, sunshine. No, you can ackn that things are bad, but you have to always just think of what you're grateful for. And like all the good things in your life will also help you be more positive. If you're like bummed about something, be like, you know what? I've got great friends, great family. I've got a pair of shoes on my feet. I've got a car to drive. Whatever it is that makes you happy. Okay. Dear Emily, Hi, I'm a 23 year old virgin. Unfortunately, I'm worse than a virgin. I've only ever kissed once.

Not only do intimate situations make me nervous, but I have issues trying to determine when is the right time for things in terms of social cues. Any advice you could offer. Thanks, Ken.

Ken, this is the biggest issue ever when it comes to guys because we can't.

Can't read the cues at all. There was a study that came out years ago that said that men actually are not equipped to read the cues. Like, they're not wired in the way to read cues from women. So, Ken, you're going through something that a lot of guys go through. You can't tell if she likes you, if she wants you to kiss her, and then you're like fuddling over it. You're like, I'm worried. I'm not running the cues. I say you just gotta be more aggressive and more confident, Ken, and not worry so much about what if it's right time? Not right time. Intimate situations that make you nervous just go in for the kiss. And I'm not saying within the first five minutes, but if you're on a date with someone and it's going well and an opportunity presents itself, try to kiss her. Try to be intimate. Try to tell her what you like about, you know, that you're having a good time. I mean, I think that you might be one of these guys, just aren't able to read the cues. And I also think that, like, even, and I've said this before, that you guys gotta make the move because you're so afraid of rejection. But life, rejection is a part of life. And there have been so many guys. And I'll tell you this, I've gone on lots of dates, I've kissed Many a guy. And I never get mad if, let's say, a guy tries to kiss me and then I don't want to kiss him. I'm never mad. I'm never like, oh, why'd you do that? That's so rude. I just. I think you can't really lose. If anything, you learn that she doesn't want to kiss you, but you gotta just be.

And you stop wasting time.

Don't waste your time.

And. And I'll tell you this right Now, Ken, I'm 20. I'm not 20. I'm 30. I wish I was.

How old are you now?

I'm 32 years old.

Finally.

When I was all the way Till I was 24, I was so afraid and shy to make the move when it came to women. I wasted so much time.

You never made the move?

I never make the move. There would be girls that I would hang out with for, like, a year, wasting my time, and I would never try to kiss them. And they wanted to kiss me. They wanted me to, you know, make the move.

But were you afraid of rejection?

I was afraid of rejection. I was afraid that, oh, they don't really. They don't really like me in that way. And I've messed up so many times because.

So then how did you finally turn it around?

I finally just said to myself, And I've said this on the show many times, so the new listeners, they might not have heard this before. If she doesn't want to kiss me or doesn't want to be my girlfriend or date me, I'm not gonna die. I'm not gonna die.

No. What's the worst thing?

You know, I'm. You know, I'm not gonna be homeless, you know, and there's so many women out there that you can't. That would be down to.

Exactly. To Mac with Menace.

And I've. Yeah, man. Women, you just. You gotta make the move, man. Just don't be afraid.

And again, keep dating.

If they say no, you're not gonna die.

Right? You're not gonna die. And I think you got to make efforts, Ken, to meet more women. Maybe you got a date online. You got to give yourself more opportunities. And just remember, you might get rejected 99 out of 100 times.

Yeah. And the rejection sometimes. Yeah. It's gonna hurt, man. You know what I mean?

It's for, like a minute. The more you've rejected you get, the more you get used to rejection. Right?

Yeah. And another thing, you always wonder why, like, oh, why is the slimy guy, you know, with that chicken. Because that slimy guy has been probably rejected by so many women 90 times, but it's just like a numbers game to him.

Yeah, it's a numbers game.

He doesn't care if a girl rejects him, whatever. He just goes on to the next one, on to the next one. And then finally he finds a girl this, like, this willing to put. Put up with the slimy, you know? So, yeah, man, just take.

Just take risks and don't worry and don't spend too much time in your head that you're a virgin, that you've only kissed one person. You're the only one that knows this stuff. And I think that you're using it to scare you. And fear is the biggest that holds us back. And I think that you've got some fear around it, and you've got to just release it and put yourself out there in situations where you'll meet people.

Yeah. And then once I got over that fear, man, I was banging so much.

Really?

Ridiculous. Yeah, ridiculous.

Ridiculous. Oh, my God. And you haven't stopped ever since, right?

Lighter. But, yeah, I was banging.

I can't believe you've gained 50 pounds.

Really? You just notice it because you see me every day. But some people that haven't seen me a long time, they're like, oh, dude, what? What happened?

God only can say that to other guys.

But I'm back. Back in the gym.

That's good.

And what's cool about the gym that I go to is each machine has its own television, and they all have Bravo. And it's weird because I told you the misadvised show that you star in and I make appearances on are playing in the gym, and there's people everywhere watching it.

That's crazy.

But it's funny because they don't recognize it because they're looking forward at the thing. So I'm like, running right next to somebody that's watching both the ones on the television.

That's crazy. I saw. That is so crazy. Someone else told me that too, that they saw it at their gym or not on the airplane. Oh, yeah, they were on the airplane. And everyone on the airplane was watching it. Yeah, we love that. That's cool. Yeah, no, it's cool. So let's move into our topic. Threesomes.

Threesomes. Oh, real quick. Sorry not to keep on talking about reality television, the show that you're on. Misadvised. There's a lot of people that are, you know, we have international listeners from all over the world, and a lot of Places you can download the show on itunes. Just search misadvised. I know people overseas that have downloaded it and watched it. So if you don't. I know Bravo's not overseas, so.

Right. You can download it.

Yeah. Go to iTunes, search Ms. Advice and download the first episode's free. Yeah.

Yep.

The whole season is like eight bucks.

Dude, eight bucks is so worth it for Menace 9 television. Of course. So please everyone, download the show. That's great, Menace. It's a great point.

Point.

Okay, threesomes. Three is company. Okay, so threesomes are one of the biggest sexual fantasies out there and one that a lot of people actually play out. And even if it's just a one time event, it can open you up to new arenas of pleasure and exploitation. Or they can be horrible. People have bad experiences with threesomes. Like it ruins relationships. They break up, they have sex with someone else in front of their partner, their partner can't handle it. So before you have you go head first into your first threesome, we've got some guidelines that will help you make it a night to remember and maybe repeat.

Yeah.

Okay. Before the trio, the most important thing is communication. Communication, communication. You have to get a lot off your chest before you take your pants off. For example, if you're in a couple, which is often a lot of times a couple says, let's have a threesome together. We're together, let's bring someone else in. Well, you need to set rules and guidelines. You need to decide, like, is there going to be penetration? Like, if it's a man and a woman, is she allowed to have sex? If it's another guy or is he allowed to have sex? If there's another woman, is there making out involved? Is that person going to sleep over? What are the, what are the boundaries? What are the guidelines? You have to set all this up ahead of times. Threesomes are not for everyone. Your partner may not even be comfortable with it. So you don't want to risk your relationship by pushing something for someone, something that you, that you want and your partner doesn't want. So you have to first just bring it up. Which can be kind of a hard situation. Hey, honey. Because then women could flip out, think I'm not enough for you. And I don't think it's about that. I think it's about a fantasy that a lot of men and women hold about just being with two women at once. But they might not be that into it. So you can begin the discussion though by talking about fantasies. You can ask Your partner, are there any sexual fantasies that you have? You can might. Instead of saying something like, I've always wanted to bang two chicks at once, you could say something more like, I've always wanted to see you kiss a woman. That might make her. She might be thinking, wow, I've got fantasies of kissing women. Yeah. So don't say you want to bang two chicks at once. Don't lead with that. If you are the one pushing for the threesome, they should be the one to decide who the third party is. So she gets to pick if she's attracted to this other partner. Like, you don't get to pick. I think it has to be up for the woman if the guy brings it up. So you have to again, establish if penetration is okay with everyone. Does everyone cool with that? Does the person sleep over all that stuff?

Stuff.

Okay. You have to avoid common mistakes with threesomes. So everyone involved is going to have their own expectations and limits. So pre coitus communication is a must. If you're a couple, make sure the third party is on the same boat as you. So you might even have to have a little pow wow before it gets started. Doesn't sound hot, doesn't sound romantic, but you might have to be like, listen, babe, you're not sleeping over. Or listen, third party, you're not sleeping over. There's no penetration. Talk about what you're comfortable with, what you're not comfortable with. And once you know the limits, respect them. I don't care how badly you want to have sex with this person, you should still respect them.

Limit the liquid courage. You don't want to get too effed up before you do it. Sorry, Menace.

Wow. You're always knocking the good name of alcohol. Emily.

I know, I love alcohol, but I just think that you, you know, and here's the thing about threesomes, they're tricky with relationships going in. I mean, a lot of times if you're a single dude or single woman and you want to get. Sometimes it's kind of fun having a threesome when none of you are attached to. To me personally, that's been a success because no one's expecting anything. It's not like I'm watching my boyfriend do something and I'm watching this girl do something. But I get that it's very common for couples to want that.

How was your first threesome experience?

It was good. It was hot. It was fun. Yeah, it was with. It was that situation. It was with a friend of mine, a woman that I had known for A while. And then this other guy that we were both kind of dating. And then we had this threesome, but we weren't really dating him. We were kind of dating him. Whatever. Long story short, we had a threesome. And it was great. Cause there was no, like, hard feelings. No one felt bad, whatever. I guess I've had a few. I'm trying to remember now, but I've had all good experiences.

Good.

Except for that one I talked about on television. The second one wasn't good.

But the first one, it's so hard as a guy to put it together. You gotta get the woman the women have to corner.

That's why it all takes communication.

I had, I would say, two opportunities for it to go down. I was messing around with a girl and she even brought it up. She brought it up. She's like, yeah, how the hell do.

You mess that up?

I was like, oh, yeah. But it was like super.

In the wee hours of the night, you know, in the a.m. right? So I'm like, oh, yeah, sure, of course. Blah, blah. So I started dialing the phone. I couldn't get the other girl to pick up the phone, right? So then fast forward many months later.

I'm with both of the girls again. I'm like, oh, yeah, tonight's a night. It's going.

Tonight's tonight.

We make history, you know, and then, you know, we're all leaving. We're leaving the spots that we're at. And suddenly the girl that brought it up initially, months before is not down anymore because she has feelings for me now.

Oh, God.

She doesn't want to do it anymore. And the other girl was upset. She's like, come on, are we going or not? Oh, my God.

She was down.

The one that I couldn't. The one that I couldn't get awake was like totally down for it.

And did you want it?

And now the. The one that brought it up in the first place didn't want to do it anymore.

So sad. The tale of threesome's gone awry. You should write a book. So whatever happened, you just went home with your girl?

Yeah.

That's a bummer. That's a.

Totally pissed at both of them. I just.

You just left both of them?

I didn't even get laid.

Yeah. You're like, don't. Don't tease threesome and then pull out.

Yeah, I went. And actually I went to work and slept on the couch at the radio station.

Are you serious? Oh, my God. Is that when you were sleeping in the morning?

That's why you know, bitches are drama. I mean, lovely ladies are drama.

Yeah, it's okay. Okay, so listen, when you're having your threesome, a few things to get started is might be nice to take a shower together.

I love taking showers.

Everyone's on the same page. You're open, you're clean, you're ready to explore. So a little shower together could be a little nice initiation. You still need to be communicating. Nobody's a mind reader. You gotta change positions. You have to announce it. Threesomes require a lot of foreplay. Not only for physiological reasons, but also for psychological because everybody needs to feel involved. There's a common thing with threesomes where one person feels left out. So remember, threesomes are about three people. You might end up feeling jealous if you're not the center of attention. So be complimentary. Use names. Also, keep the mood light so you and your partners know you're having a good time. If you're the man in the threesome, chances are this is a fantasy come true for you. But remember that the woman won't be catering to just you, but to other as well. So don't try to please both your partners at the same time. If you feel like you always have to be attention paying attention to both, neither will be satisfied. So think of how hard it is to please one woman. Yeah, imagine trying to please two at the same time.

No way difficult.

So, you know, maybe one you're pleasing one, the other one's masturbating or has a sex toy or something like that. Okay. Don't expect everything you desire the first time. Just remember that by having the threesome, you're actually experiencing a very great gift. You can also include masturbation in it. Might seem strange, but it shows how comfortable you are in the situation and sets the mood for others. So if you know the other two people are having sex, you can still pleasure yourself. Like I said, so after the threesome, it's mixed. Some people say it's not wise to all spend the night together. It can be really fun for you all to spend the night together. It's up to you. If you're in a relationship, you should reassure your partner that you enjoyed yourself. But it was experimental fun. Tell them how much seeing them in pleasure turned you on. And while you did enjoy yourself, you're happy that it's just the two of you. Sometimes women might need reinforcement after the threesome and tell them that it was no big thing. Yeah, she was hot, but I really would rather bang you. That kind of Thing I commend the.

Men that can coordinate it.

I know. I mean, it's hard. There's a lot of guys I know are like. A lot of guys I know wouldn't even want one. They're like. Like I just said, they're like, I can barely handle one woman.

Yeah.

But it is a common, common fantasy. So there's positions. You could also go online watching threesome porn together. You can discover the moves that you like. The Sinclair Institute. We love Sinclair Institute. They have a video called Nina Hartley's Guide to Threesomes. So if you're really like, I'm not getting this, Emily. I don't know. You know, you don't have to watch a porn with a threesome because learning how to do anything through porn is not the best way. But Sinclair Institute has instructional videos. And Nina Hartley, she's a longtime porn star. She did one on how to conduct a successful threesome. So I would suggest doing that. There's lots of great instructional DVDs out there that people can learn how to perform oral sex, how to do different things. You can read my book. I've got an amazing book called hot sex. Over 200 things you can try tonight. You can buy it on Amazon. And it is every position you can think of, every position in the book. But they're not like, difficult, weird positions that you can't do. They're positions that you can totally do, and they will make you happy since you're pimping yourself.

Talk about Keigo Camp, which was a huge hit because we did the video.

Show the other day and then they.

Played the video during the video show.

I love that. I loved our little video show. Tuesdays at 2:00', clock, Pacific Standard Time. Okay, So I have an app for the itunes store for the iPhone called Kegel Camp. Kegel exercises are for men and women. You can do them for five minutes a day. They're the pee stopping muscles. So they're those muscles that when you stop and start the flow of urine, you contract them and you release them. My app, and it's for men. I've heard, actually for more men than women, that it's helped them with their sex life. It helps men with premature ejaculation, helps men stay harder, longer. It helps women have stronger orgasms. It helps them with urinary incontinence after a baby or something. You tend to, like, leak a little bit. Like you sneeze and you pee in your pants. It's not pretty. But Kegel exercises tighten those muscles. And the thing about the app is a reminder pops up every day that reminds you to do your Kegel exercises. You're like, oh, time for Kegel camp. And it's my voice walking you through it, which we know is so lovely.

Yes.

Right.

Speaking about peeing, you know Snooki is pregnant.

Yes. She peeing in her pants.

And I was watching. She has a new television show with JWoww, who's another cast member from the Jersey Shore.

Right.

Which hopefully everyone's seen it. It's an amazing, critically acclaimed television show.

Christ.

But so they go to New York, and I guess there's this. There's this place called Ninja or something like that, some restaurant. And so they have, like, ninjas that just fly out from different places, and they're in the elevator going into this restaurant, and then Ninja flies out and she pees her pants.

Oh, my God. Really?

Yeah.

She's scared.

Yeah.

Yeah. That's what happens when you're pregnant, too. But, yeah, Kegels are.

So you're gonna definitely. Well, that's what they recommend for women after they have a baby to do.

The Kegel exercise or do it during or after. And it really helps. And you can buy these Kegel balls. You can buy them at Good Vibes that you stick in. Remember when. Remember I was wearing those for a few days?

Yeah. You had some balls.

I had some balls in my vagina Up. And you can do your exercises just by walking around. They naturally do the exercises for you.

Wow.

I know. It's awesome. I have to start wearing them again. They're sitting in my bathroom and I keep meaning to put them in the balls.

Has anybody walked in and go, oh, what are these?

No, no one's come over.

Are these stress balls?

Yeah, they look like that.

That you put in your hand.

They kind of look like that. But I hope nobody catches my Kegel balls after they've been in my vagina. Not the genesis wrong with my vagina, but I just, you know, germs. One more shout out is to Masks. Mask is kind of like a Listerine strip that masks the taste of semen. We all know that oral sex tends to fall by the wayside after you've been with someone for a while. If you're with a woman who. Or a man who doesn't love performing oral sex, you take these Lister. They're like Listerine strips. They come in chocolate, strawberry, watermelon, and mango. And it's your masque. M A S Q, U E is the website, and the goal of Masque is to Bring you and your partner closer together inside the bedroom and out. And they're delicious. We taste them. It lasts for 15 minutes. They're like this cool, minty, like, feeling with cool, minty taste. With chocolate, strawberry, mango, watermelon.

Oh, your favorite.

Don't you feel like if it would increase women's ability to give you orgasms, I mean, give you blowjobs, wouldn't you be like, here's the Listerine strip.

Yes.

Doing the Lord's work.

I remember when I was a teenager and I was, you know, trying to get fellatio, then I, I offered up strawberry flavored condoms and they were down for it.

Oh, they sucked the condom over your penis. Did it feel good?

Yeah. Just once? No.

No. You'd rather not do that?

Yeah. But this Listerine thing is not. They just put it in their mouth and it dissolves.

Right?

So they're actually sucking your penis without a condom.

Exactly. We've got some samples if you're interested. Email us. All right, thanks everyone for listening to sex with Emily. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com Good Vibrations carries the hottest toys and vibes. I love the Jeju Mi Me because it's discreet yet extremely powerful and great for couple sex. Find out how much pleasure your body can really handle. Use coupon code Emily for 15% off@sexwithemily.com goodvibes.

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