V-Day & V-Steams

Okay, so let's talk about one of my favorite ways to upgrade your solo or partner play. It is the Hera by Jeju. It's a sleek, powerful rabbit vibrator that's basically the best of both worlds. It's incredible for internal stimulation and those rumbly, mind blowing clitor vibes Jaejoo is known for. Here's what I love. The external ears are powered by the same motor as the Mimi which you've heard me rave about before. I love the Mimi. And the internal arm delivers deep, deep, satisfying vibrations right to your G spot. It's super soft, ultra quiet and it moves with your body. So whether you're using it solo or with a partner, it has this feel like it's made just for you. And honestly it's kind of a no brainer. Everyone loves the hera and right now you can get 20% off the hera using code emily20@sexwithemily.com hera that's emily20 for 20% off@sexwithemily.com h e r a so if you've been looking for a toy that delivers powerful blended orgasm with thoughtful design and serious quality, this is it. So go treat yourself. You deserve it. Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. You know Valentine's Day right around the corner and I know you're scrambling to find the perfect gift for that sexy someone in your life. So in this show I'm going to tell you about the hottest Valentine gifts for your lover or yourself. Hey, Valentine's Day is all about expressing love and that means to yourself too. Plus we'll be answering some of your emails. So thanks everyone for listening to the show. Okay, if you've been following me lately on Instagram or Twitter or anywhere else, you've probably seen me rocking my Vesper by Krave. That's my beautiful necklace. That looks like a pen, right? Madness.

It's amazing.

Yeah, yeah, it's amazing. Vibrator.

People really have to look it up because it's unbelievable. It looks like a piece of jewelry that you would buy at Tiffany's.

Storm. Yeah, yeah, right, exactly. And it's a vibrator. I wear it every day like cause it's a layering piece. It's really beautiful. You can get something engraved on it. It's kind of my obsession and it's a very powerful vibrator. It's not just like a. I don't know, you just always have your vibrator on and you sexy all the friggin time. So it's the Vesper by Krave. And it's basically wearable technology. You always know you have your vibrator with you, and it's stylish and it's hot, and it's kind of the perfect gift. Do you want one for your girlfriend, Menace? Cause I can. When you want. It's a perfect combination of elegance and pleasure. I get compliments. Okay. You know, I love compliments, Madis. Every day. I love your necklace. And I'm like, oh, by the way, it's also a vibrator. It's super cool. So for a limited time. You guys, check this out. Go to lovecrave.com.

So from February 3rd to February 9th, use code Vdayemily, all caps. That's vday, Emily. And they never do stuff like this@lovecrave. So lovecrave.com, vdemily, you get 20% off. So. So I would go there now. And then your Valentine's Day present is done and done.

So I think it would be an amazing Valentine's Day. Jewelry.

Vibrator sucks. Jewelry sucks.

The thing is, like, also, like, so many vibrators are the really small, discreet stuff. It's still, like, oddly shaped or it's a weird color and stuff like that. So if it fell out of your purse or something like that, you probably get instantly embarrassed. But if this thing, like, you could wear it on your body and people would have no idea I do it every day. They would just think it's. They would just think it's cool, you know?

Yeah, exactly. I don't tell everyone either that it's a vibration. I'll be in a meeting, and I'll lean over and press it and start. My boobs will start vibrating. But I'm kind of happy about that. So, anyway. Okay, check it out. So. All right.

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they call them, in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.

A girl's gotta have her standards. Oh, my.

Do women know about shrinkage?

Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much?

Are you kidding me?

Oh, my God, I feel so good.

Being bad feels pretty good. But, you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

Okay, thanks, everyone, for listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to all of our podcasts. Sign up for our mailing list. Check out all of our Valentine's Day gift guides, because you better get on it. People's it's happening. And check me out at Facebook and Twitter and Instagram Sex with Emily. And also, it's really easy. If you subscribe on itunes, you never miss a show again. And also, oh, we have a survey up. I forgot to mention our survey. We've got an awesome survey. It takes like 3, 3 minutes to finish to complete. You could win some toys and it'll help us make a better show.

Yeah, I think one of the questions on there is, do you hate menace?

It's funny that you say that.

It's like 90%. Yes.

We've gotten a lot of results. I'm actually really. So thank you to everyone who's already responded to it because I'm just. It's great to get your feedback and a lot of people actually really like you, Menace. It wasn't even the. We didn't even put you in there as a yes or no. But they're like more menace. More menace turns like us.

Thank you.

There was some production stuff, but I don't want to talk about that because.

You'Ll get anxious because I get it.

Because we care about sound. Momentous does. I mean, I care, but he's brain all about it.

I don't care. Behind the scenes, you would think that I'm the biggest dickhead because I really want to make sure that every episode, the sound quality is amazing and sometimes it's out of our control and it doesn't sound that great here and there. And I apologize for that because I really do care and I want the quality.

He's gonna cry. I've never seen my man get so emotional.

I know, because when, like, somebody says, like, oh, it didn't sound that great here on, like, some episode, like, I get upset.

I know. Like, he's about to cry. Like, I've never actually seen you so emotional about anything in my life. It is true. So if. Yeah, I know.

Because it's something that's so easily that can be taken care of. And if it goes on over and over again, I get pissed.

Because we're gonna find a new studio. I got it. We're gonna get good mics. We're gonna get good things. No, we've all. But it's good. It's better than most podcasts. Let's just say that.

Yeah, definitely.

And since we were the first podcasters. I should stop saying that.

I'm like compressions.

I'm like Al Gore. I know, I understand.

But go ahead.

Yeah, I'm like Al Gore. Like, I invented the Internet. I had the first podcast on the web. No, but we did, like, 10 years ago. We always had really good sound. That was our thing. Maybe content has gotten better over time. I hope we've gotten to be better.

Hosts, but less sloppy all over the place.

Yeah.

Really?

Yeah.

You're gonna evolved. Okay. So. Yeah, that's the deal. And then also, are we supposed to. Yeah. Talk about the Podcast Awards. Oh. Cause I was gonna talk about the Podcast Awards that I'm co hosting April 14th.

Yeah, that's super cool.

I know. It wasn't that exciting in Vegas with Dennis Miller. And I want everyone to vote for me too. So you gotta, like, tweet this out.

Okay.

So there's a way that they can.

Vote now, Isn't there, like, a weird way that people have to vote?

It's really hard. It's really intricate. I'm gonna say this again later, but I just want people to know.

Don't you have to, like, give your blood type or some crap like that?

Exactly. It's not the easiest thing in the world, but if you guys nominate your favorite podcast. So it's for the 10th annual podcast awards, and. And nominate my podcast. So it's on the ballot. It's easy. It doesn't take a lot of your time. Go to podcastawards.com, type sex with Emily in the mature category. They're obviously not talking about me, the content mature person, and then copy and paste my podcast URL into the designated spot. See, you gotta copy and paste. Not just, like, check a box. If you're not sure where to find the URL, just click on the Sex with Emily show at the podcast1.com page, and paste that URL in the designated spot@podcast awards.com. this will all be on our website and nominations and soon. Please send me sign up for me today.

If you go through that effort to do all that and to vote, I. We really appreciate it. So again, go to God. That was Podcast one.

Yeah. That's the easiest way.

Yeah. And copy that Emily. And then is it.

Copy the URL and go to the Podcast Awards and then look for mature and then paste it in there.

Okay. All right. It's a couple steps, but you know what? If you really love Emily and sex to Emily, you would do it.

Exactly.

I mean, you don't have to pay for this show.

No, it's a free show. It's true.

It's a free show.

It's a free show. It's just my blood, sweat and tears.

We try to make you happy. Emily almost has a heart attack every single day over nothing about this show. So the least you can do for her is just go and vote.

How many breakdowns and heart attacks have you seen me have?

Oh, just like, mental. It's like. It's like exhaust. I love you to death, but it's, like, exhausting to be around you. So it has, you know, I have to have you in doses.

That's how you max out.

I don't even know like, how your team of people, they don't.

They barely.

Yeah, I mean, I'm sure they have some really good edibles or there has to be a dispensary somewhere nearby.

Yeah, we just.

Your office.

Exactly. We just got high in Sing Kumbaya.

You know what I mean? A lot of people have worked on the show and done bigger and better things. So.

What do you mean?

I mean, it's all worth it to be hanging around you. That's what I'm trying to say.

It's a good time. Okay, Menace, So today's show is very important because Valentine's Day.

You don't even have to tell me that. It's important because my mom has been a florist my entire life and my aunt, too. So it is like the end all, be all when it comes to relationships or love or something that you're interested.

Do you really believe that? Like, are you planning something with you and your girlfriend this weekend, next week?

Not like. Yeah, yeah, we're planning on. We're planning on maybe, like, going to Palm Springs or San Diego or something like that. Or like, doing. Doing something.

Like, chill. Not going for work like you always.

Do, outside the norm. But not like, oh, you know, I have to do this elaborate dinner with.

You know, I think it just cut to the sex. Like, try to improve your sex that night. Okay. If you're in a relationship, just try to do something that improves your sex life that night.

Yeah, well, that's what it all builds up.

Yeah. It's all about. It's a day of. To celebrate romance and love. Okay? Look it up. That's what it's about. Love, Romance. So what does that mean? Sex?

Yes.

Intimacy enhancing. Something in your life. Like, you can go out and spend, like, $300 on dinner, or you could sit home, have a picnic in your bedroom and just have some rockin sex.

Yeah.

Try to do something that you want to do all year. That's what I say day about love. But we're gonna get into the Valentine's Day stuff in a minute. But I've got a little bit sex in the news that I can't. I can't let this one go by. Like, I can't wait another second for it. I have a question for you, menace. Does your vagina need a steam cleaning?

Oh, not this.

Yeah, not so much. So Gwyneth Paltrow at it again.

I like Gwyneth Paltrow already, please.

She doesn't have too much time and money. She's like, maybe till I get my couch cleaned, steamed, and my vag.

I think maybe, like, Gwyneth Paltrow can live her life. And who cares what I say about Gwyneth Paltrow? All right. I think she's just such. In, like, a higher level.

Yeah.

She can't even maybe income level that, like, puts her in a space where she's not with the norm, you know? So it might come off as me, like, hating on Gwyneth Paltrow. It's just like. I just don't get it. I don't understand it.

Well, doctors don't understand it either because the star is touting the alleged benefits of another dubious practice. Vaginal steaming, or V Steaming for short, is describe a treatment that she received at the Tikkun holistic spa in Santa Monica, California.

See, you use me at the holistic crap. You love all that stuff.

Yeah, I do, but I've never gotten my vag esteemed. Okay. I mean, I was gonna do it this weekend, but now that Gwyneth did it first. Now, the actress said in her newsletter, the real golden ticket here is the Mugworth v. Steam. You sit on what is essentially a mini throne, and a combination of infrared and Mugworth steam cleanses your uterus.

Did she say wart?

She calls it Mugworth Worth. No. Is that from the Mugworth? Is that like a powder thing?

I don't know what it is. No. It sounds like it, though. Like more than what?

I don't know. Yeah, exactly. There's no scientific evidence that shows that it works. Says Dr. Birch. Who knows about it. I guess she's an obgyn. Steaming your nether regions could even lead to unpleasant side effects. I mean, it's true. It's just like douching, the whole douching thing. It's bad for you. Your vagina naturally cleans itself out. It regulates its ph balance. You should not Be sticking things in there that are not. You don't need to be cleaning it. You don't need to be like vacuuming it or whatever she's doing with it to get a vaginal. Steaming. Yeah, she squats over a steaming bowl of water. Blah, blah. I shouldn't even tell you about this. It's just bad for you.

Okay, people, I was watching TMZ live and they had a guy. Did they do it?

Did they have her doing it?

No.

That would have got a lot of hits. Okay, what happened? A guy was doing it.

Yeah, I was doing it and just.

Penis steam.

Describing the feel and it's just. Yeah, it's just like steam being pushed into your.

Yeah, you can get bacterial infections. Okay, so don't go if you're going to spend like. I don't have to add some like.

I mean Gwyneth Paltrow is probably going to a really extremely high end spa, but I'm sure like the day to day person like you and I can't afford to go to a spa like that. And if you're going to try to get it done is probably not the most clean the spa ever. You know.

Facial.

Yeah, that's where, you know, people, they get like weird funguses and stuff like that.

Exactly. Yeah, totally. So don't listen to Gwyneth Paltrow. She just says she had some extra pocket changes. She's a crazy. I'll go get my vaccine.

She's a crazy rich person.

You know, Nothing wrong with rich people, but you know.

No, I'm not. I celebrate Richards.

But she shouldn't be sending out this information where everyone's gonna listen to celebrities because celebrities have a lot of power in today's culture and they're all trying to get their vagina steamed. And then they're all end up with bacterial vaginosis. So don't do it. Yeah. Couples late night office sexcapades watched by an entire bar ends up on Twitter.

Sweet.

2 New Zealand Insurance company employees could be in a huge trouble after their attempt at some office sex went viral. As it turns out, those giant well lit windows faced out toward a bar of drunk patrons. So you know the building next to each other, Right? The whole pub knew about it, was watching while they were totally oblivious to it. Reportedly, even the in house band stopped playing as everyone watched the two get it on. They snap pictures and posted them on YouTube. And their employer says they don't condone the actions of the couple and are investigating the matter. So they could even get fired. They never realized how public their private time was. They wanted to avoid having sex, you know, having their sex life all over the news. So they should just turn the goddamn lights off.

Yeah.

Right, people.

It's crazy because you.

They're probably drunk or something.

Well, sometimes, like, when you think that you're on a certain level at a building.

Yeah. You think you can see it.

No, people can see. Like, I go down. I go down a bunch of levels in the building that I live in, and I can still see, like, right into my living room window from way far away. So people watch out.

Wow. So can people watch you having sex?

Yeah, I remember that I was in. I was doing something before I lived here. I was at Venice Beach, California, and I. It was with a bunch of people doing. It's called the Fiesta Movement. It was like this thing with Ford. So 50 people, YouTubers and, like, Internet people were all together. And we're all staying at the same hotel, and we just started partying. And then we sneak up onto the roof of the hotel and just keep on partying all night. And then we look over at the building next to us, which was the apartment building. And it was really, really hot that day. And everybody in all the apartment buildings were completely naked because it was so hot.

Okay.

And then you can, like, see people getting it on and all kinds of crazy stuff.

Course in Venice.

So. Yeah. So, yeah, put the blinds down if you don't want anybody to see.

Exactly.

Some people are into that. They want people to see them.

Yeah, but not these people. So they got fired from the job. That was kind of a bummer. Has anyone ever caught you having sex before? Walked in?

Me having sex? No. No, not that I.

Never in your life?

No.

Your mom. Did your mom ever walk in and you masturbating? No.

Oh, God, I would die. But what about you?

I'm glad you were walking.

I'm sure you've been. People walked in.

Yeah. I'm trying to think of it.

I was like, yeah, whatevs.

Yeah, like a billion times.

No, not a billion times. I'm trying to think if anyone ever walked in me, you know, there was, like, this horrible time. I mean, but this was freshman year of college.

Yeah.

And I'm sure. No, no one's ever. I'm sure someone's walking, but this was the worst experience ever. So we got home drunk, late night at the bar. My boyfriend at the time went to Michigan State. I went to Michigan. I drove there for the weekend to stay with him. And he had a loft. There's these tiny Dorm rooms. Right? So everyone used to build those lofts. Yeah, still do it. Whatever. So he slept in the loft. We got back to his room, we started having sex. We're, like, drinking at, like, a kegger all night. Whatever. We're having really loud sex. And unbeknownst to us, his roommate was just, like, right below us in the room. We didn't see him.

Okay, I've had that happen before, so.

That was really embarrassing. And I had forgotten about that. And. But no, no one's ever, you know. But that was like. I wasn't even walking in. I just, like, walked. I just didn't pay attention that there was someone beneath us sleeping. And to this day, when I run into this guy because he lives in hometown Michigan, I'm so mortified.

Lock your doors, people, and just pay attention to who's sleeping beneath you.

Oh, for real?

For reals. Okay, so we're gonna get into our Valentine's Day gift guide, and then we're get into your emails, because I know you're all like, shit. What do I do? We're here to help you. I've got Madison here. Hello, producer. What's up, Madison?

Not much.

What's going on?

Just hanging out, you know.

Hanging out. We're talking about sex toys because we've tried all these. Why is she here?

Yeah.

In this moment. Yeah, she's always here.

No, but what we're talking about.

We just said. We're talking about the Valentine's Day gift guide.

Yeah, but. Oh, what? Did she make up the gift guide?

Well, yeah, she helped. We're gonna talk about the toys with you because we've actually tried them all. Except for we have not.

Well, see, that's what I was asking.

Oh, I see. I didn't finish my sentence.

She didn't.

Well, I mean, she was gonna get to it.

I tried. It didn't cut me off. They think I was gonna say Madison is here. Okay, so Madison works with me, and we've actually, pretty much, between the two of us, I think, tried. We have tried everything on this list. She has more experience with the Fleshlight than I do. She's talked a lot about it on the show. Not that she has a penis.

Yeah, I was gonna say that.

Let me clarify. She's not a transgendered woman or transsexual, but.

Which is so hot right now, by the way.

I know it is. I wish you were. I really would like a transsexual on my staff.

We should actually put it out for an intern. You know, be careful.

You know What? I mean, not that a transgender person's not gay. I could totally be speaking. I don't know exactly how to put everything, but some of my gay friends are, like, mad at the transgenders because they're stealing all the thunder.

They're all over the place, though. It is true.

It's so hot right now.

Yeah. No, it's the whole chicks with dick thing, and the whole thing is that we're talking about. No, it is true. It is a whole phenomenon now that it's all over television around, but it is getting a lot more. There's a lot more action with transgender people. So I feel like maybe there'll be a lot of men now, you know, starting to buy some women's dresses. Yeah. And flesh their penises, I think. I love that people are getting threatened by transgenders now.

Well, it was like Entertainment Tonight, our entertainment show, that just recently they hired one as a correspondent.

That's awesome.

And then Orange, the new black.

Exactly.

Huge. Winning a bunch of.

Don't you wish that you decided to be a transsexual transgender person?

Me?

Do you wish you could have done that? Maybe your career would have just taken off.

Oh, yeah.

I don't even know how we got on that. Oh, the. Madison does not have a penis.

I don't have a penis.

Madison does not have a penis. But she does have experience with the Fleshlight. So anyway, we're gonna go over. You know, we get a lot of sex toys in our office. It's part of the jam. You work for me. You gotta try out some sex toys. Okay. And I don't always say to talk about it publicly, but it helps us review toys, and it helps us, you know, so we. Because I. When I talk about stuff and I say to you, oh, this is what you should. This would be a great gift. And not just because I thought it looked cool. It's. Cause I've tried it. I've tested it. We know. And I'm not gonna tell you or lead you down any roads, so your penis is gonna fall off or something. These are all really good tried and tested and true products. So Valentine's Day, first thing is, you've heard me talk about the flashlight a lot. Back to Madison's experience. Madison actually has a great blog on our website, and she's talked on the show before about her experience with her boyfriend giving. Do you remember this? Giving him a flashlight. She's 24. Her boyfriend's about this. 25 now.

Oh, yeah. I'm 24. He's 22.

22. Okay, so. And they're good. They live together. Everything's great. Would you like to. People who haven't heard your flashlight story?

Okay, so just brief thing. My boyfriend is a very sexual person. And I'm. He's 22 years old, but he's, like, all the time.

We'd be concerned if he had his way.

He would be having sex multiple times a day, every day. And I'm sorry, I'm a human woman. I'm busy. I have a job. Like, I don't have time for all of that. So every once in a while, when he's feeling frisky, he comes home from work and I'm doing stuff. I'm just like, yeah, no, no, go take a shower or take your Fleshlight. And it works out really well. It's got a couple of awesome benefits. I think most girls are like, I don't want to give a guy a Fleshlight. Cause then what if it's better than me? He's not going to have to go to their family's house for Christmas. No, it actually worked out a lot better for me. I feel like I got the better end of the deal personally, because now if he wants to have sex and I don't, he's got a great outlet for that. It kind of actually turns me on, too, because then I feel like I'm almost, like, having a competition sometimes. Like, he'll be like, yeah, I've got my Fleshlight. And I'm like, I'll show you. What's better than a flashlight.

Exactly. Like, get that flashlight. Right, Exactly. But it comes in handy. It's like, instead of, like, you know, oh, no, honey, tonight I have a headache. You like, oh, no, honey, here's your flashlight. Exactly. So it's kind of like it's presenting a solution to a problem, not just complaining about it. But what we were gonna say is, you've heard me talk about the Fleshlight, but the Fleshlight Shower, there's, like, accoutrements. You know, this. The Fleshlight Shower mount. You could put it in the shower, hold your flashlight, and then you could, you know.

They're taking it to levels now, dude.

Yeah. And then there's the launch. The launch pad, which is the one that it connects to your iPad. So if you're having sex, if you're watching, as men often do, some kind of porn or something on there or whatever turns you on. I don't know.

I'm sure they made, like, custom videos for that, too.

No, they did. They made Point of View. So it Actually, you're looking down at your Fleshlight as you're using it on the iPad and it looks like you're doing dog. Yeah. Having sex with. With a person.

Right.

That's amazing.

So that's what we're recommending some accoutrements for your Fleshlight if you already have one. So go to fleshlight.com or go to my website. Click on the code Emily, click on the Fleshlight banner, use code Emily. And you get like, you can get.

Him, you can even get him lubed too. And then you've got the whole package. He's got the Fleshlight, he's got the accessories, he's got the lube. You never have to do anything.

Okay, quick question. Like, what's the actual size of it?

Can you describe that the flashlight in itself?

Yeah. Oh, do I need a backpack?

They have.

Honestly, croissant. It's like this bottle of champagne.

No, they have ones that are this big, you know, full size, but they.

Just like a liter.

Yeah, they just came out with one. If you look at Emily's YouTube channel, she just put up a video, video the other day of the new Fleshlight Go, which we saw at she.

Dude, you can put it in your pocket.

It is actually the size of a flashlight and it still can encompass. It still can accommodate 90% of men, I think, which is pretty cool.

Yeah. So it really is like a flashlight. Flashlight on the go. It's a cool thing. So check it out then. The next thing that we want to say that we want to recommend here is a penis ring. So we've been talking about penis rings for a while.

Well, you have been talking about them for years.

10 years.

But they really are very pro penis ring.

You know what? But I think that I was pro penis ring before I even tried like the master mother of all penis rings, which is the Mio by Jae Joo. Okay. So they make my favorite toy, the Mimi, the little pebble. Cause their technology is like, it has this rumbling. This is the thing. It's become very nuanced with sex toys now that it's sort of this rumbling sound motor in the Jaejoo products that just make it better. So this penis ring is the Mio M I O and it turns into a. So how do you. You put it over. One size fits all. You put over the penis. It's like a lot of penis rings and some of them are disposable. This one is a full on twofer because it's a vibrator that you could use anywhere in your body. Like your nipples for clitoral stimulation. It's, it's great, it's rechargeable, it's beautiful, it's waterproof. But it's like a full on real vibrator that stays on your penis and you menace. I was gonna give you one for Valentine's Day if that's cool. Yeah, but you have to try it.

Feels good on the penis. Like men freak out. They're like oh my God. Like I didn't know vibrations could feel so good. And then it vibrates in the place where a woman climbs on top of you to have sex and then she gets the vibrations and everyone's now, is.

It rubber, plastic, steel, Silicone.

Silicone is beautiful. So Madison, would you like to talk about your experience with it? Because we both in the same weekend, not together, had great experiences with it.

Yeah, no, it's what sets it apart is that it doesn't look like sometimes you get penis strings that are disposable and they look kind of cheap. They're made of like the gummy material. This is a really nice material, super sturdy feeling. But it's also soft so it doesn't tug or anything. If you're trying to put it on, it's not gonna pull your hair or anything like that. And it stays in place. And I've had a lot of penis rings over my experiences with them that like slide around so you never know where the little vibrating bean thing is gonna be. Is it gonna be in your front? Is it gonna be in the back? Is it off to the side somewhere? The Mio stays put the entire time which is incredible. Like makes it a lot easier, right?

And you can like pull it off and then put it around your fingers and like use it like the nipples. It's like it's just the coolest friggin thing. So it's the Mio by Jaejoo. You can go to our website or no, go to jeju.com j e j O U E. There's also and use code Emily. Yeah, yeah, get a discount, get 10% off. Okay. Then we've got sex checks. What if you could have sex checks? Menace. Like I feel like every guy's complaining that their partners, they don't take initiative and that women don't initiate sex enough. What if I gave you a box of a book of sex checks and in them I wrote like good for one, blood job, blow job, like good for whatever. Right?

So this is an official one.

This is an official vibe. Vibes like people via good vibes. Dot Com. Yeah. They make them buy them in good vibes. You can get some sex stuff. Checks. Sex checks. It's $8 for 24 checks.

That's amazing. At first I thought it was like, cereal or something. Sex cereal that made you horny. But that's good.

Yeah. And you could. I think you can even like.

It's really good. Cute. For Valentine's Day.

Totes. Yeah. Okay. Then we have the gifts for her. The Tango by We Vibe. A lot of us started out. Bullet was my first sex toy.

Mine, too.

Yeah, Madison started out with the Bullet. Little tiny bullet. Not intimidating clitoral stimulation. The Tango by We Vibe is. It is the killer bullet, I have to say. It's rechargeable. It's only three and a half inches long.

All right.

Which is actually good and good for girl on the go. It's discreet. It's the most intense one I've ever felt. It's hard plastic. Metal material. Hard plastic material makes it durable and waterproof. Rechargeable. It lasts two hours and 90 minutes on one charge. It's $80 of good vibrations. It is totally worth it. I bring it everywhere. It's the only one I travel with.

Nice.

I think this. And what about you?

Yeah, I actually haven't tried it yet. But the cool thing about it is that it's super eco friendly, like, for. I always recommend it. Like, if you have any of those girls in your life that, you know, don't drink out of water bottles, and they're like, they want a Prius and they're all about the environment and everything. This is the sex toy for that girl because it doesn't use batteries made out of recycled material. And it lasts forever. Like, you charge it 90 minutes, it lasts for so long. Take it wherever.

Exactly. No one deserves it. The Tango. And this will all be on our website, too, right, Madison?

Yeah. I told you. I told you that story. I think that's what, like. So I had a olden old assistant in San Francisco, and we lived in the same apartment building, and so she asked me to help her move her bed, and it fell out of her bed and she almost.

Oh, her vibrator died.

No, it was like the Bullet.

Oh, the bullet. Right, right.

She almost died of embarrassment because I. Because I picked it up and I didn't know what it was. And I saw a little button on it. And I hit the button and it starts vibrating. And then instantly I knew what it was. And she turned totally red.

It's embarrassing, but, you know, I was like, dude, you're like, I know I'm sex with Em. Don't you know what I do?

I don't do sex with Emily. Come on, you don't have to be shy in front of me.

I know. I just wish that the whole stigma, I think it has gone away a little bit with the boys. I mean, I just think women just whip out your toys, show them. Or if you're a guy and she hasn't showed you, ask her, be like, hey, do you want any toys, babe? And then she'll feel comfortable. Because I think that with a lot of people, couples, because these presents too, you can buy for yourself, you can buy for your friends. You know, like, wait, whoever wants to have pleasure. But I don't think there should be an embarrassment around it.

Yeah, I would give all my friends tangos if I could. Like, I'd just be like, hey, who wants a vibrator? As it is, like, I try to be pretty friendly with the vibrators because I have access to so many. But I think it's a totally safe gift for girls to give other girls too.

Absolutely. That's all I give. And my friends who get married, I give them the. What's it called? The rub My ducky. It's a vibrator. Looks like it's actually a rubber duck, but you can also put it. This is a great. If you're having a friend, having a baby and you will only buy sex. I only give sex presents. That's like, I decided that. Cause everyone needs better sex at some point. Probably at all points. It's a double. You can use it. Clean yourself with it. Like truly on your baby. But then it's a vibrator. Yeah. Wow. Best present ever. Okay. Dahlia by Vibratex. This one she has always wanted since she blossomed into adulthood. Because she probably would like a G spot orgasm if she hasn't had one yet. So get her the Dahlia. It's pretty and pink. It's fun and flirty. It's kind of like a rabbit style vibrator with the little things. You get the dual stimulation.

And it packs a multi orgasmic punch. Dual motors, external butterfly appendage. Flutters against the clitoris. This gets me turned on. Just talking about like fluttering.

Dual motors literally is a butterfly though. So it's like. It's little wings and antennas. I have one. It's pretty crazy looking when it gets going.

Yeah, exactly. Takes AAA batteries. It's awesome.

Tesla must have a lot of closet space.

We actually do. Oh. At home. Oh, no. Do you Know that lately I've been. My office actually is bigger than my home. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. More space and bigger. But.

It'S. I've been obsessively lately to the point where it's probably unhealthy. No, no. Well, that too. But I've been trying to figure out the best way to organize my sex toys, and I'm, like, Googling it, like, going to Pinterest. Like, there's not a lot on Pinterest on it. I'm like, what is the best way? Because I have that I like. Of course, I get rid of the ones I don't like, and I don't ever talk to about them, but there's some that I like, and I want them to be with the charger in a place, and I don't have enough room. So I'm like, constantly, like, well, should it be in a hanging thing against the wall? Should it be. I obsess about it.

That's great.

I just want you to know IKEA.

Probably has something for that. IKEA has organization for everything.

Like, put out a line, say, sex toy holders. Like, make a briefcase on the go.

Yeah, I will. It's on the list, dude. It's just that in the special dump truck vibrator.

The Emily line.

Okay.

Storage.

The dump truck.

Yeah, exactly. It's a good idea. Okay, the next one is the Vesper, which I talked about earlier. Mm. Yeah, I got Vesper. Okay. So I knew that we were at the show in Vegas, that my assistants, both, they were like, oh, my God, I want one of those. I want one. And they gave me one. This was, like, a few months ago because I'm friends with Michael from Vesper. From Crave. That's the name of the company. And they make these. The necklace violator. And they were like, oh, my God, I want one. I want one. That's all I really want. If I could. If I get anything, I want that. Because they get a lot. Yeah, so they do. I want that. So anyway, I got them all one.

Nice.

I know, because I love them. I was like, oh, I saw Michael. I'm like, you know, that's all they want. They don't ask for much. They don't care if I buy them lunch or dinner. They just want to create Vesper. So, Madison, what's been your experience with the Vesper necklace? Jewelry that vibes.

It's. Honestly, it's so pretty that I have yet to use it as a vibrator because, as I pointed out, like, I feel like after I use It. It's gonna feel like a little bit. It's gonna feel a little bit more scandalous. Yeah, I know. I need to. I could wash it. I'm always so nervous about washing my sex toys, though. Honestly. I do it, but I'm, like, paranoid about it.

I'm like, burn the house.

It's like washing a baby.

Wait a minute. There's sex toy cleaner and spray.

I know. I don't have any.

I have a hundred bottles. People just need to come to my house.

We need to communicate with people.

We need to communicate that you just clean it. You just like, rinse, wipe it with a dry towel. But also, I have a cleaner, because you can. I'm telling you now that it's very powerful. It comes in rose, gold or silver. 1616 inch chain, USB rechargeable, conveniently plugs into your computer. Very quiet, three intensity levels, and it's anywhere from $79 to $149. And it's an awesome gift. And people can get it@lovecrave.com and from the second to the ninth, third to the ninth.

Yeah. They get 20% off if they put V Day.

Emily, all caps in checkout.

Nice.

Yeah, Nice, right? Madness. Yeah.

You're gonna have this whole list at Sexdom.

Yeah, I know. Should we just run through this quicker here? Because then we could.

Yeah, sure.

I mean, yeah. Well, no, I'm just saying.

No, you're right. It's all@sexdelmy.com I don't want to worry about. Because you're like, I don't want to get any of this. But listen, Tris and Tiramino's, this is great gifts for couples. Tristan Tiramino Shades of Kink bondage kit. We can't ignore 50 shades of gray. It's just coming out and it's bringing bondage and SM into the mainstream. And here's the thing. Don't freak out if you're like, I don't want to hit her with a whip and chain. When you hear bondage, you don't have to be thinking about pain. It can be just a blindfold. It could be tying her wrists above her, you know, with a bondage thing, with a restraint. It's like Velcro. It's not even like you have to use, like, handcuffs. Like, it's easy and it's fun and it's power play.

When people think bondage, they're thinking, like, your head and toe and leather. There's whips and chains and all that's immediately what they go To, I think, again, 50 shades of gray is probably gonna change everybody's outlook on that.

Yeah.

Which is good. So.

Yeah, it is good. It is good. But I'm saying, if you just want to get. And you're like, I don't have a dungeon I don't want to do, you can get the Tristan Tamino's Shades of Kink bondage kit. And then there's also the. Is there another one? They have a bunch of bondage kits too, at Good Vibes.

That's the top rated one. And it comes with a book, so it comes with her Intro to Kink book. So if you don't know where to start and you're like, ah, like, I have this blindfold. Like, what am I supposed to do with it? She like, walks you through how to use it. So it's just good for, you know.

Yeah. Cause a lot of couples don't. They're like, I don't know where to start. That is the perfect one. Okay, I think you guys should all check it out. Go to goodvibes.com Again, you can use code GVMLY20 GVMLY20. Get 20% off. But now, first, a word from our sponsors before we get back to our gift guide. Oh, my God, it's the Fleshlight.

So we've already told you a lot about the Fleshlight. Number one sex toy for men simulates the sensations of sex. This is a good gift, too. I was actually just saying you should get the shower mount and the one for the iPad, but Fleshlight guys freaking love it. No one's ever said to me, why did you make me buy a Fleshlight? Okay, it just. It's next. Some use your hand all the time. You might as well use a male masturbation sleeve. And if you hate it, let me know. Okay, I'm sorry. I will refund you. I shouldn't say that. I can't personally refund you, but no one's ever said that they hated their Fleshlight. No one's like, oh, I hated it. I threw it away. Like, it feels really freaking good. And I think it's a great gift. Buy them some of the things. And if you buy it from sexemily.com, click on the flashlight banner and use code Emily. You get their award winning lube.

Love it.

Lube and flashlights go hand in hand. Okay, back to the gift. We got the Jeju Dua Dua. And this is the couple's sex toy of the future. They've got these. It's a Whole trend now. The remote control vibrators that you can control with your Bluetooth.

It's a very discreet pen. It's not even out. Like, it's gonna be out by the time people are listening to this, but it's coming out tomorrow, and it is so frigging cool. Your partner. It has, like, a James Bond. It looks like a James Bond sex toy.

Yeah, it's got a little pen. It literally looks like one of those fancy fountain pens.

The stuff.

Small ones. And that's the remote control that controls it. So no one has any idea what you're doing. You could be sitting across your part, across from your partner at the dinner table or wherever you're at and just clicking this. People are like, why are you clicking that pen underneath? They're getting, like, full vibrations going on. It's pretty. It's pretty hot.

It is. And you can use it in. Yeah, you can use it with your same city or different city or long distance, because you can also control the vibrations through Bluetooth. It's awesome. What final thing I gotta say. Candles. Who doesn't love candles? Men and women love candles. Emily and Tony, aromatherapy massage candles. Add a little romance to your lovemaking with beautiful candles that I made for you. I made them so you could have better sex.

Tony and I were like, they smell good too.

They smell right. Fougere Coco creme de vanilla. The wax melt. It's not even wax. It melts into the most luxurious massage oil. And it'd be great for Valentine's Day because you could actually give each other a massage and connect intimately, because that's really what it's all about. So go to emilyandtony.com and use code Emily. And I think we've got some discounts going on then too, at some point. So check it out. Emilyandtoni.com. all right. That's my gift guide. What are you gonna get. What are you gonna get her? You're taking her dinner? You said something?

No, no, no. I said that I wouldn't do all that. We're probably just gonna go. Go somewhere for the weekend.

All right. That's nice.

Yeah, I'm gonna turn up.

Stay home for the weekend.

Huh?

I don't know what I'm doing for the weekend.

Why? You're just gonna call up one of these randos and go do something. You're not gonna be home on Valentine's Day by yourself.

What day is it done? Saturday, right? Mm.

Yeah. It's a Saturday too.

That's such a. But no, here's the thing. I'm not hooked up. I love. I think Valentine's Day definitely serves a purpose on the planet. And it's great that it's a day about celebrating love whether you're single or in a relationship. But I never. Doesn't like, bum me out if I'm alone. I'm like, good, let's go out with my friends and have a good night and then go home and masturbate with my new sex toys.

Yeah. Can I tell you the.

Please.

The worst Valentine's Day was.

I've said the show. I said this on the show a couple times. So I'm sorry if you heard it before, but when I was in high school, I got with this girl a week before Valentine's Day, and I didn't. I wasn't really paying attention. Even though my, you know, my mom always burnt in my brain that Valentine's Day was extremely important day because she was a florist.

You think?

Yeah. And.

I didn't get anything for my girlfriend at the time because we only been dating a week and she got me a ton of stuff. I felt so bad.

So what happened?

So. But no, she was like, totally fine.

Did you call your mom? You're like, mom, bring me some roses. Yeah.

Send me some flowers. No, but do you know what my mom did do back in the day, which was amazing is all throughout high school, she would send me to high school with bags and bags of single roses, and I would give them out to all. All the girls that I knew.

All the girls you knew were just.

Every girl that I was.

There were girls who didn't get flowers.

Yeah. And I would just, like, hook them up with a flower.

Dude, you were always the man.

Here's a rose.

That's so not like you. Now. You wouldn't do that now.

I wouldn't.

You got so cold and hardened. You're like, you want a rose? You can't have a rose. The rose is prettier than you, bitch.

Oh, no. This Valentine's Day, this is not like day to day where, you know, I'm gonna, like, act that I'm thirsty, you know?

I know, I know. Okay, fine. Okay, let's get into some emails. Because if people are looking towards forwards, towards Valentine's Day.

Yes.

Or anything. Are you in a relationship or out of a relationship? The bottom line here. Or let me just say this wrap up Valentine's Day thing is that it does. I don't care if you're, like I said, relationship or single. If it's A. When you are in a relationship, I don't care if he wants a briefcase, you can get him there. But try to do something sexy that night. Try to do something that just kind of spices it up a little different that you've never tried before.

Talk about sex for the first time. I don't care. But it's the one day that you have permission to do whatever the hell you want sexually and to bring it to the next level. So I say take advantage of it. You could spend $300 on a dinner. You could do that. Or you could go home and have amazing sex. Or you could do both.

Just do something now. Do you know the holiday a month after?

Yes, I'm a fan.

After. Oh, you are a fan.

I think it's clever. I wish I thought of it.

Do you know the name of it.

Is Steak and BJ Day? Yes. If I didn't know that, I would be out of it. Yes, I did.

It's a national men's holiday.

So explain how Steak and BJ Day. I think all it works is that a month from Valentine's Day, your guy comes home and you're like, hey, baby, wait right there. I gotta give you a blowjob, and then you can blowjob. Oh, but wait, the steak is ready. Yes. Steak. I think that's what you do. What do you think, Madison?

I thought you gave them a blowjob with the steak. Like you just wrapped it around and worked the shaft with it. That makes sense to me.

Not a bad idea. It's really creative. You can kill two birds with one stone.

I'm a vegetarian, so I would just hold it away from my face and be like, ah, there you go, baby.

Like a V steak or something, you know?

Yeah, exactly. Steak and BJ Day. Because guys don't get enough frigging attention out there. They gotta take it to get.

Shut up about the attention. You're so.

I'm just saying that blowjobs, I mean. You know what? It's funny, though, that there is a holiday. Blowjobs. There's not, like, cunnilingus, you know, Tuesday or something. There should be.

Every single holiday is geared towards pleasing a woman. It is.

Every holiday is geared towards pleasing a woman.

F. Yeah. Christmas.

Towards each other.

It is. Christ and stuff.

Christ. Yeah. What about Christ? Doesn't he get a day?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Like, if a guy gets you a lame present for Christmas, you will be upset. If a guy got a lame present from a girl, he wouldn't be that upset. He'd be like, okay, you know, whatever. He's not gonna go home and cry about it and call all his friends. So do not tell me that every single holiday is geared a little more towards a woman than a man.

I don't know. Maybe. Maybe.

There was a study that I read earlier. Did we do news in here? Yeah, we did a little bit. Something I read said that women would rather have gifts than anything else. Like that women are more uptight. Like, they really. I had a friend like this when she first got married. Her husband at the time, now it's still her husband, but when they first got together, he always messed up the gifts. And it really upset her. Like, I'm not really a gift person, but she was like, I can't believe you didn't get me this or that.

You've proven my point.

No, I get it. There's a lot of women. That's a big. To me, I'm like, don't get me anything.

And I mean it, so don't say okay. A lot of angry women let a guy have a steak in BJ day and not caca on it. All right.

Cock Allah. You should be the poster child for steak and bj. Maybe they're looking for one. It'd be a good sponsorship.

I don't, like, parade around until.

But, you know, you've got the billboards with your face on it now. Yeah, the cartoon. You could do like a steak and BJ one with you. I think it'd be good.

I'm not the staking BJ pusher. I'm just saying.

You sound like one.

No, I'm just saying that, you know, we. We mention it as we're talking about.

I'm just kidding.

Okay, so let's meet my friends. Oh, my God. That's all they talk about for a month.

We should do. We should have a steak and BJ party.

That'd be really fun, actually. I mean, there'd have to be some, like, different rooms and stuff like that.

No, no. But not really ideal jobs. But it could just be a fun, fun part. Just like. Yeah, I know. People would get the wrong message. If it's a blow job, they'd expect.

To come in and have a BJ party at Emily's.

There are no blowjobs and there's actually no steak because everyone who works for me is either vegetarian. But we're gonna talk about it. We should give blow job lessons. It's gonna be a great day. Okay, so emails from the people. Thank you, everyone, for emailing me. Feedbackextextwithelmy.com what?

I just thought of an amazing event.

Go ahead.

You'll have a stake in BJ event. I mean, you wouldn't be giving out BJ's, which would be extremely disappointing, but you would surf steak and teach people how to. How to give blowjobs.

I was thinking that actually my salon that I go to just asked me if I would do a party there. Like teaching blowjobs and sell my sex.

Steak at a salon. Never sounded better.

They probably don't want the steak, but yeah, I get it. Okay. Emails. How to find a third person for a threesome. Yes, we know. It's your number one fantasy. That's how we're gonna talk about it. For men, actually, it's their top fantasy. Okay. You talk about. Hi, Emily. You talk about how to approach your partner with the topic of a threesome, but what about after you've done that? We don't know how to approach a woman and ask her to have a threesome with us. We don't wanna just ask a friend and make things odd between us all. So how do we go about asking someone if they want to join us for fun? Thanks, Dalton. He's 22, from Missouri. So thank you for putting where you're from. We've started to ask for that again because people used to always. So, Dalton, 22, Missouri, how to find a third. Okay, that is true.

They get down in Missouri.

They do.

Yeah.

Right. I love it. And it is tricky once you get to this point. So, Dalton, I hope you're in a very good place with your partner. You discuss the rules and you're in a confident place in your sex life because that's when I recommend that couples have a threesome. So assuming that is all true. Looking for a third. I mean, back in the day, people putting ads on Craigslist. You don't really wanna do that.

No, no.

But there are sites online that cater even to your area. You can put in your area code or your neighborhood. There's FetLife. That's one F E T. FetLife Kassity is a big one K A S I D I E and adult friend finder. Those are websites. There's also play parties. I know you think you might not know anyone in your area who. Whatever. But if you've got like a sex toy shop or you've got some friends that you think might be into their world, people have play parties and swinger parties and. Do you ever hear this Madison with friends?

Yeah, actually, I hear about it. On Facebook, of all places, people are like, yeah, like an adult party. And I'm like, I know what that means.

You're like, I know what that means. Now, I'm almost. I'll be 25 soon. I'm not quite an adult. No, I get it. You know, they say you're not really adult, so you rent a car at 25, but. Yeah, exactly. If you keep your eyes open, Dalton, you're gonna find those people. I mean, but these are some websites to start with. You might even find that in your area. They might say, oh, if you're in our area, there's a meetup in one of these websites. So it's like, FetLife Cassidy, adult friend finder. And also, there's a new app I heard about called thrinder3 n d e r. That helps.

Well, I was about to say, I'm surprised Tinder hasn't. I mean, Tinder is still pretty new, so it's going to take a while to develop, but I'm sure that eventually it'll break off into something like this. There'll be a feature.

Well, now there is Tinder.

Yeah.

It hasn't gotten great reviews yet because there aren't a lot of users on there, so. The people on there.

Yeah, but it's not an official Tinder.

Oh. I mean, it hasn't reached fame like Tinder.

Okay. It is not affiliated with Tinder.

It is not. No, no. But there's ways. You just get into your, like, money, you know, your friends that would know this kind of stuff.

I was just reading about Tinder the other day, about the premium stuff. Have you been hearing about.

No.

So there's gonna be a paid upgrade. Yeah, they have to. Every place does. Don't get mad, but it's gonna have an undo button and some other thing where you can, like, swipe.

Oh, if you swiped wrong way. Right or left. Yeah, you swiped left, and you wanted.

So have an undo. And the other thing is, it's gonna be able to. You can pinpoint other cities. So let's say you're traveling to New York, Right? So you. But you're here in Los Angeles. You can start planning your hookup. So it'll be great for people that they're already, like. They're trying it out in Europe and. And it's already huge.

No, that's really smart, because a lot of people I know only use Tinder when they're on the road. So usually you have to wait, though, till you land in New York or you land because it picks up geographically where you're at. So this would be. You pay a few bucks a month, and you can start planning your dates for New York. Where I started using Amy Laurent from our Bravo show. We were talking about. I was with her in New York last Valentine's Day. She was my date, and she's like, you're not on Tinder yet. We didn't make up, and I actually ended up going out on my first date. Actually, I never talk about this because I forgot, because I always think my first one was on my show. But I did meet a guy for coffee in New York that I met on Tinder. Wow. For like, 20 minutes.

I swear to God, it wasn't a good day. I just saw that at Katsuya, some sushi place here in la.

Yeah.

Where the people met at Katsuya off Tinder, and they were sitting right next to me the whole time.

You heard him talking about it?

Yeah. Yeah. It was crazy.

That's awesome. I've actually heard there was a guy who live tweeted an entire, like, first Tinder date one time, and it was really funny. He, like, live tweeted the entire thing.

Was he into her?

No. It was really awkward, and that's why it was so funny.

Right? Exactly. He's not gonna be like, she's the love of my life. Like, really? Did you gain 10 pounds is your last photo? You could hear guys dissing girls.

They definitely continued the date because they were talking about, oh, so where'd you park? Blah, blah, and they took off. Because you gotta be pretty confident that you're gonna hook up with this chick if you're gonna meet her at Katsuya.

I was gonna say that it's not a cheap place, and I hope who's. Who paid?

Oh, I'm sure he did.

Well, I don't know if he's too sure, but I hope. I mean, maybe they've been chatting for a while or something, because that is a commitment to stump for sushi. I feel like on most dates right now, you. Most dates right now, you. Yeah. You want to do coffee or you want to do it quick or you want to do drinks? So that's nice. Tinder's taking over the world. Okay, next question. Man on bottom. Dear Emily, is it wrong for a man wanting to be on bottom all the time during sex? Sign Bobby. Okay, let's take this one. What do you think?

Well, it might be because he can last a lot longer being on the bottom than if he was any in any other position or it's A lot less work and you don't get tired as quick.

Yeah, but to only. He only wants to be on the bottom. And I'm wondering, it's not wrong. Like, people ask, am I doing something wrong? I mean, if your partner's cool with it, and your partner's like, yeah, be on the bottom. I'll be on the top. I'm happy. And you, you know, walk off into the sunset and everything's great. However, I wonder why you only want to be in the bottom. It is true that a lot of money can last longer because if your partner is a female, a lot of times women, they're on top, they can control the motion and the rhythm, and they can have more orgasm. Sometimes when they're on top, they're more likely to orgasm. But I don't think it's a bad idea to, like, switch things up. Bobby, I'm wondering, like, is it something about your body? Do you not want her to see you in a certain way? Like, why do you only want to be on the box? So you could try sitting on the edge of the bed. You could try the spooning position just to mix it up.

Because it's just boring times that you might have had it in other positions and wonder why, and then maybe it didn't last as long. And then that's definitely the answer right there.

Yeah. Because when guys get on top or they do the from behind.

Yeah.

That's their go to Dunzo. Dunzo. So again, Bobby, I'm not gonna tell you if you're right or wrong, but depends what your partner's with. If you, you know, if your partner's cool with it, it's fine. But I think also sex is all about variety, mixing it up. So I would try to work in some positions. Edge of the bed, couch.

Yeah.

Being on the bottom, sitting up, maybe holding each other, being on the.

Honestly, being on the couch is, like the most, like, effortless position for everybody. And I think it's, like, one of the more orgasmic, personally. Like, I really enjoy it.

I enjoy couch sex, too. Because you're not in your room.

Yeah.

You're already watching TV anyway.

Exactly. You literally just roll over and you're having sex. And then when you're done, you can keep watching the movie and it's fine. Nothing happened.

Except when the couch gets dirty.

Yeah, that's true.

You gotta get a special coat for.

Your couch coating, like a plastic. Oh, what kind of couch garden does that work? I brought some to the office for the chairs. I should bring them to My house for the couch. Because I have some issues.

Yeah, no, I think I have some, like, special coating on my couch that you can see.

But is it too late once you buy the couch? Are you just. Scotch?

You got to do it when you messed up.

Whoever has time to Scotch, girl. And you get something you're so excited, you just jump all over it and ejaculate all over it and.

Yeah.

The day you get it because you're so excited.

I have, like, special insurance on my couch. If it, like, does get a stain that they.

What kind of. Where'd you buy your couch?

Yeah, I didn't know they did.

What do you mean, the insurance?

Like, there's special insurance. Like, let's say you come over and you drop a glass.

Which I would. I would totally do that.

The second I walked. You'll drop some wine on it that I have it insured where they. They'll fix it.

Do you buy, like, a $5,000 million dollars couch?

No, no, no. It wasn't too expensive.

Like, from Sharper Image.

Yeah. That's so fancy. Okay. How do you make.

I like to be classy.

You are classy. Okay, next email. Dear Emily, you're always mentioning the wrong way to make love or have sex.

Totally.

I feel like you don't really ever.

My girlfriend says that she loves it when I pound her hard. She constantly tells me that she wants it rougher and rougher. Each time I began thinking maybe it's because she's only 23. Maybe she doesn't really know any better. I was wondering if you could. Would give me some suggestions on what real lovemaking or effing should look like. Thanks, Bob.

Now you guys are gonna poo poo it. But the thing is, like, believe it or not, every single woman is different. So you can't. You can't please them in the same way. And maybe this is what she's into. She's not saying anything.

She's never. An orgasm. Yeah.

Honestly, this is a girl who has only learned how to have sex from either porn or, like, an older boyfriend that she had when she was younger. And she thinks that that's the only way to do it. And so in porn, they're always yelling like, harder, harder. Like, pound me harder. And she's like, I'm just gonna do that because he really likes it immediately when I say it. And so she just keeps doing it.

Exactly.

She sounds like fun and you guys.

Listen, Bob, when you break up with her, can you just send her numbers? Because he just wants to pound the Shit out of a chick? No, but here's the thing. I'm not saying that this is wrong. I'm not saying that, you know, there's anything. Okay, what is he asking me exactly? It's only because she's 23, she doesn't know any better. Okay, first of all, I don't always say the wrong ways, but sometimes that's what people listen to. That's what you're hearing from it. Okay. Which I'm glad you're just learning that sex is. Is, you know, evolving, constantly evolving. And there's different tips and tricks I give on the show, but I think it's not a bad thing to take it slow. Do you practice foreplay with her? Do you ever slow it down? Do you turn her on beforehand? You know, slow sex, fast sex. I just think you don't always want to have sex the same way over and over again. So I'm thinking when she's saying, pound me harder, pound me harder, she just wants to be over because she's hungry or something or she wants to go shopping with her friends or. I don't know. I just think that you could, you know, the longer you stimulate her and slow things down, she's more likely have an orgasm. So maybe you're talking after you went down on her for 30 minutes and she had six orgasms, she wants you to pound her. Or you probably need to slow it down a bit and turn her on.

I vote alternate. Like, what's wrong with doing, like, a little bit of the jackhammer stuff? And if she likes that and then slowing it down and kind of, like taking it and seeing how that goes, switching positions? Like, you don't have to just stick with that one thing the whole time.

Exactly. Like, why not flip her around so she's on top from behind? So I think he's trying to tell me that I'm wrong, that girls, like, don't like it, and I'm not. And sometimes it does feel good.

In short bursts.

In short bursts. So alternate. Like, go back and forth, try different positions, but one girl just wants a pound. Pound, pound. I'm a little suspect that's all she wants.

All right.

Okay. What?

I'm just saying.

Okay. You're just saying what?

Okay. All right. Do time for one more.

I'd say so.

All right. Hey, Emily. I am a new listener and love your podcast and learning new tips each week. I'm in a relationship with an older and more experienced guy who's amazing in bed. I feel I'm not holding up my End of things in the bedroom, especially in the oral region, as I'm nervous my inexperience will show through. He says you'll be patient and wait, but my nerves get in the way whenever I begin to let my guard down. How do I gain the confidence to give him what he deserves? Thank you, Lauren.

Girls that are iffy about oral are like, what? The worst.

But have you met girls who tentatively approach your penis?

Yeah. That are just like, you know, they're not confident, which I understand. That's why she's emailing, that she's not confident. But it is very frustrating for a guy who is, like, dealing with.

What's the most frustrating blowjob you've ever had? What. What exactly happened?

I think. No, it's exactly what she's talking about right here. It's like you're not confident. You're not confident anywhere in any way. And you just like, oh, I'm not good at it. I'm gonna try it. And you, like, put, like, zero effort into trying to be good at it, you know?

So stop thinking about it too much, Lauren, because you are psyching yourself out. You can't really mess it up. If your mouth is warm, if it's wet, make sure that there's lots of saliva on there, that you have a lot of that. There's pressure, enough pressure with your mouth. And that's why your hands are your best friend during bloodjop. So use your hands. Your mouth goes up and down.

Worst thing ever is no pressure.

Yeah, no pressure. Like, a soft blow job is not good. So that's why your hands are your best friends. You use your hands in a blow job, make sure that it's wet. But honestly, Lauren, the number one thing that men across the board, across the world will say that it is about enthusiasm. A woman who is confident and even sometimes this is a fake it till you make it thing. Just go after it like it's the most delicious lollipop ice cream cone you've ever had. And you do not want to let a drip of that ice cream cone fall into the floor. And you lick it. And you look up at him and you look excited and you're into it. You will become that. And you just. There is. It's not like there's a right or a wrong. I'm just giving you a few things. Be enthusiastic, use pressure. Make sure your mouth, you know there's enough saliva, and you'll get into it and you'll learn it. And you know what? He'll appreciate that. You're making the effort. So I also, on my website, I've got a ton of how to give blowjob tips on my website, too. Sexelmy.com if you want to get into the details of it. But I think the most important thing is that you got to get your confidence up. He's not judging you, he's attracting. As long as you're willing to go for it, he's gonna be fine.

Ask him what he likes. Ask him to tell you, like, how to do it. It could be a big turn on for him getting to direct you down there also.

Yeah. Be like, hey, babe, do you like. Some guys like their balls licked?

Yeah.

Some guys don't.

Not into it.

Yeah, I know. Like, I give my boyfriend direction sometimes when he's downstairs and he really likes it. He enjoys the fact that I'm telling him what I like and what feels good to me because then he can do it better.

It is such a gift.

Yeah.

You know, right? Don't you wish everyone just came with an instruction manual because we're all so different? I wish guys did, too. So it's nothing wrong. Hey, babe, do you like this? Do you like that? Give her a little feedback, and then he'll be getting the blow job he wants, and you'll feel better. Lauren, I think that's great.

And just a heads up, for guys, if a girl says that she's amazing at it, it's gonna be the worst blowjob you've ever had.

Has that ever happened to you? Or is that just your pessimism side?

Oh, no, it's. It's a code amongst men that. We all know this.

What? I say it all the time, and I. Well, am I. Am I. Am I exempt from that?

Maybe I think I'm good.

Like, I just feel like I've had a lot of confidence in it, and I've even. I don't know, whatever.

But I shouldn't say that.

So I'm just ruining my whole life.

Well, no, you're not.

It's gonna mess them up.

Now, you're not parading. Because some women parade around and say, how amazing.

Like on their business card, like on their Facebook page, where it's like they'll.

Be having conversations with guys and they want to pretend they're a badass and, oh, I'm great at giving blowjobs. No, you're not. You see, right?

Be careful of any woman who says she's great or even anyone who says they're funny. Like, oh, my God, I'm so Funny, I guarantee you. Although I do that sometimes. You don't know me, but I'm actually funny. I tell you, I'm like, oh, shit. I don't necessarily have to tell you that they're funny isn't funny, or that they're good at blowjobs, although I really am. I'm sure Madison is. I'm sure your girlfriend's okay.

You'll get tweets and emails, guys agreeing with me, I guarantee you.

Okay, good to know.

Yeah, every girl's got to have her trick. Like, my thing is I don't give good hand jobs. I'm terrible at them. But I give good blow jobs. I have to be good at something.

Hand jobs are a waste of time anyways.

Lube. Lots of lube. Lots of lube.

Yeah.

Hand jobs.

Don't worry about it, girl. No one wants that anymore.

I look myself in the eye with it.

Exactly. I've actually had that before. Yeah, I've had the ejaculate. Lost my vision.

I was talking about too slippery. It's like. It's too lubed up. I'm just gonna, like, hit myself in the face.

I had ejaculate in my eye and I couldn't see for, like, a day.

Girls, like, threw up on them.

I was like, 25. Yeah, girls throw up on him, the whole thing. So just be careful there, Lauren, and have a good time with this guy. Don't stress on it. That's what we have time for. Okay, Madison, thank you so much. And how can people find you, Madison?

I am on Twitter. Therealmadeesha. That's my Twitter handle. She's kind of embarrassing. And Instagram, Hurricane Madison.

Hurricane Madison. And also she has great blogs on my website, sexwithemily.com. check those out. Thank you so much, Madison. Thank you. Thank you, Menace.

Thank you.

Find you menace. M E N A C E. Across the board. Yeah.

On Instagram and Twitter. And thank you always to the listeners that always tweet me and comment on Instagram that they listen to the show. I really appreciate it.

I appreciate it, too. Thank you, everyone, for listening. I love you and happy Valentine's Day. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Anyway, thanks for listening. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com thanks for listening to the show. I know we talked a lot about sex toys, but I'm gonna wrap this up for you here and just tell you about Jeju. That's J E J O U E. They make high quality, premium sex toys that are Rechargeable, waterproof, powerful, and they hit her in all the right places. And you can play with them together. And the reason why I know this is because I've tried every toy on the planet and I love the toys by jju. You've heard me talk about the Mimi, which is great for clitoral stimulation, or the FIFI dual stimulation. If you want to find her G spot, this is the one. Or the G key. Also find your G spot. We talked about the Mio, the penis ring. Oh, my God. That's all I gotta say is it's, like, fun for the whole family. Or at least for you and your partner. I don't know about the kids. Listen, you gotta check it out. You gotta check out the dua, which is coming out the remote control vibrator by them just in time for Valentine's Day. These are next level sensations. They're beautifully packaged, discreet. Leave them out. No one knows they're mini orgasm machines. Use code Emily for 10% off your purchase@jejou.com. that's J E, J O, U E. That's coupon code Emily for 10% off. Thanks for listening. Also, everyone, I'm gonna bring this up again because the Podcast Awards, they're coming up and I wanna win. I wanna get nominated. At least the nomination process. Okay, you gotta pay attention here. Ready? But I would appreciate if you did this. So what you gotta do is go to podcastawards.com, type sex with Emily in the mature category, and then copy and paste my podcast URL, which will pop up there, into the designated spot. If you're not sure where to find the URL, you can also go to podcastone.com, click on the Sex with Emily show page, paste that URL into the designated spot@podcastawards.com. you guys can figure that out, right? Podcastawards.com, copy and paste Sex with Emily. Just do it. I would love it. Nominations end soon, so please sign me up. That'd be awesome. I'd love it. Sex, Emily. Mature content. You knew that already. Thanks, everyone, for listening. There's one overlooked mineral behind better sleep, sharper focus, stronger muscles, and a healthier heart. And at least half of us aren't getting enough. Most people don't realize they're running low on one of the most vital minerals for human health, magnesium. And here's the thing. No single form of magnesium can deliver all of its benefits. That's exactly why Qualia Magnesium plus was created with 10 highly bioavailable forms of magnesium plus. Over 70 essential minerals. It provides total magnesium support, helping you sleep better, think clearer, move stronger and feel your best every day. And honestly, when you're less stressed and more energized, your intimacy and desire naturally benefit too. Sure, magnesium can help you sleep, but Qualia Magnesium plus goes beyond that. It's a whole body nourishment for how you think, move, connect and feel. More than just a sleep supplement, it's a foundation for daily well being which absolutely supports a healthier sex life. Getting enough magnesium from food alone is harder than ever due to depleted soils and chronic stress and our body's reduced ability to absorb it as we age well. Qualia's Magnesium plus formula is non gmo, vegan, gluten free and designed so all the ingredients work together for comprehensive magnesium support. And personally, I've been taking Qualia Magnesium plus in the evenings and I really notice calmer nights and clear mornings and just feeling more grounded in my body, which always makes intimacy feel more accessible and enjoyable. It's become such an easy part of my nightly routine. Experience the most trusted magnesium for your purity, potency and performance. Go to qualialife. Com sexwithemily for 50% off. And here's a bonus use the code sexwithemily for an additional 15% off your order. That's Q U A L I a life.com sexwithemily thanks for qualia for sponsoring this episode.