What Women REALLY Want with the LadyGang

Okay, so let's talk about one of my favorite ways to upgrade your solo or partner play. It is the Hera by Jeju. It's a sleek, powerful rabbit vibrator that's basically the best of both worlds. It's incredible for internal stimulation and those rumbly, mind blowing clitor vibes Jaejoo is known for. Here's what I love. The external ears are powered by the same motor as the Mimi, which you've heard me rave about before. I love the Mimi. And the internal arm delivers deep, deep, satisfying vibrations right to your G spot. It's super soft, ultra quiet and it moves with your body. So whether you're using it solo or with a partner, it has this feel like it's made just for you. And honestly, it's kind of a no brainer. Everyone loves the hera and right now you can get 20% off the hera using code emily20@sexwithemily.com hera that's emily20 for 20 off at sexwithemily.com h e r A so if you've been looking for a toy that delivers powerful blended orgasm with thoughtful design and serious quality, this is it. So go treat yourself. You deserve it. Hey everyone. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily today. We've got the smart and sexy women from the Lady Gang podcast in the studio and we're gonna get into some very hot girl talk. Just you wait. Thanks for listening.

It seems like on almost every podcast I I advise women that what feels good to you might not be what feels good to someone else. Exploring your own self pleasure is not only fun, but it's an important part of learning what really works for you. For 30 years, Vibratax has understood that giving women options means more than offering a variety of colors to help women explore. They were among the first to introduce toys that rotate and twist to stimulate all your sensitive areas. One of my favorite examples is the Dahlia from Vibratex. The battery powered Dahlia is a silky smooth, beautifully shaped dual stimulation vibe. You know it hits your clitoris and your G spot. The splash proof exterior is 100% body safe, phthalate free and latex free. But the best part is the rotating shaft. Nothing rotates quite like this baby. You can also play with the five vibration patterns and four intensity levels. So I know you'll find the one that's perfect for you. So let's get on with the exploration. The dahlia is just one of more than 50 unique fiber protects products available for your own experimentation. Visit sexwithemily.com to see the full selection or to learn more about the Dahlia.

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they call them, in a bygone day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.

A girl's gotta have her standard. Oh, my.

Do women know about shrinkage?

Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks.

Can we not talk about sex so much?

Are you kidding me? Oh, my God, I feel so good.

Being bad feels pretty good. But, you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com where you know what you should do there? You know, you gotta subscribe to the newsletter and the podcast. So easy. Because we do two podcasts a week, and you will never miss an episode. You just subscribe. There it goes. It's your phone. It's awesome. And we are coming at you live from the Gibson showroom in Beverly Hills. And I'm with Menace. What up, Menace?

What's going on? What's the latest?

The latest is.

Are you hooking up with anybody yet?

No, dude, this is like. I have the longest I've ever gone without sex in my entire life. It's sort of like a. It's been two months in two weeks.

Well, how are you meeting people?

I realize that I'm not really trying. No Tinder.

Nothing.

Vacation. Bumble.

Bumble.

Approaching that. Thinking about it. I'm not really, like. It's weird. I've been going on dates.

Is Bumble the one that chicks pick?

Yeah, the guys. Oh, yeah. No, I haven't done it yet. Not really. I have a date. Isn't that a date? I've not really, like, gone out with people, but no sex. Like, two months, the longest in my life is weird.

You love meeting people through friends. Isn't there one called, like, Hinge? Where do you.

Yeah, I did that. Yeah, I did Hinge once. I did for, like, a second, and then. Oh, do you remember when I blind Tinder date on the show? Do you weren't there for that episode, but I did a blind Tinder date. That was my one Tinder date, and I did it on the show live, because. Why? Why the hell not? And I ran into him recently. I was at the April Foolishness. Kroc thingy. And he was there, and then he asked me out again, and I was like, I really. I think I just liked us on the podcast Tinder date. But no, right now I'm sort of. I'm sort of just.

Just hanging. Just put it out there.

It's weird. Like, I feel like I'm doing a lot of. Just not when you. When you're not focusing on your energy on that. The sex and the penis and all that. It's like, creative stuff's happening.

You're doing Loveline five nights a week now.

So now I'm doing Loveline every night.

For people to hit you up.

No, I actually did meet someone cute on there, but I can't talk about it right now.

All right.

Also, Madison, I just want to say that I'm very excited because we are finally gonna do our drunk podcast. We are talking about since show 69.

When is this happening?

Which was seven years ago. We were like, oh, my God, show 69. We're totally gonna get drunk, and then.

We'Ll do show 200.

Do you know when we're doing it? When we're having our office party.

Oh, really?

At my house?

Who's micing that up?

You are. Sorry, I am, Madison.

You guys didn't tell me anything.

We're doing it at my house. But I decided that all the girls, you never get to all hang out, they think you're, like, mean, and they don't know that you like them and stuff. And I'm like, no, Madison's actually cool. We gotta hang out. And so I thought, well, as long as we're all hanging out, I just demand quality.

And some people that don't work for you anymore were effing morons. And I just couldn't stand them.

He was so mean. No, right. But still, they don't know you. So I thought. I just want to tell you that we're going to do the drunk podcast.

Okay, good.

What if it's like, what if the drunk podcast is the best podcast ever and then we just have to get.

Drunk forever, but we'll finally get it out of the way?

I don't know.

But anyways.

Okay.

Anyway, who cares about me?

And you've got such sexy women in the studio. I'm so excited, Menace. Yeah, because this is the Lady Gang. Hello, Lady Gang.

The Lady Gang. What is that?

Hello, Sex with Emily.

Hi, guys. They've got a killer podcast called the Lady Gang.

Yes.

And I was just. It's a celebrity driven podcast from the minds and mouths of Keltie. Knight, Jack Vanek, and Becca Tobin. No subject off limits. And each week, a celebrity guest joins them. They have an honest and hilarious look. This is, like, from your thing, but you're gonna explain your own words of what life is really like under the bright lights of Hollywood. And I'm so. I had a bl on your podcast when I was on.

You were one of our best guests.

Oh, my God.

People are freaking out about everything you said. Having to do with lube, having to do with queefing. You covered everything.

That was. I mean, I felt like it was intense, but it was like. Yeah. What'd you guys think?

I think you helped so many people, including us, find our G spots. Cause I knew it was there. Did you find it?

Did you find it?

I did the two fair.

You did? Yeah. This is so funny. Here's the thing.

I already have my question, though. I. I had to pee. That's what it says.

Yeah.

It makes you feel.

No, it makes you feel like you have to pee.

Yeah.

And then you don't.

Yeah.

Oh, so what, you do and then you pee.

I didn't pee.

Right. That's okay.

But did you give yourself.

No, I didn't continue on. Like, I felt it. Felt the head to pee, and then I went back to the.

Okay, so what do you want?

That's good.

Can you have a. Is a G spot orgasm? That's different than, like, a clipped tour orgasm?

Thank God we're together again. We still.

Oh, no, you got to.

I'm so glad we had an hour with Emily on our episode of the Lady Gang podcast. That was not enough.

That was foreplay. Let's just be honest.

So.

Okay, so that's awesome, Kelsey. So that's the thing about the G spot orgasm is another tip for that is typically. Cause Jack just said. Is it a clitoral? It helps to have a clitoral one first if you can you get that, you know, rub your clitoris, and then your G spot becomes more pronounced, and then you're more likely to have a G spot after that happens.

So then when you have your G spot orgasm, then you have dinner. Then you have the clitoral orgasm as well.

At the same time, you could have a blended. No, there's so many different kinds. So you could have the clitoral one. Some people just have it clitoral one first to kind of warm you up. And then you could have a G spot one. Some have a blended where you have both at the same time, which is a party. So then you could even Have.

That sounds.

Right. No, I'm telling you, my G spot orgasms didn't come. I. I don't remember I talked about this in your show, but I, for years, was having sex. I was like, why am I not? And I had to, like, spend some serious time with, like, vibrator. Like, a G spot vibe. And, like, it wasn't until, like, a vibrator that I was like, oh, now I get it.

Do you think vibrator is the best way to get it? To get to it?

I think fingers are the best. With lube. Always lube. Or a vibrator. Like a vibrator. You could have one on your clitoris and one inside of you, and that could have that.

To me, that's like chopsticks.

It is like chopsticks. It is like. It totally is. You're like, what? Please nobody come in. No, I know, but there's, like, where the Rabbit vibes are great. Because they do both. Oh, my God. That's.

But that's the one that's super embarrassing when your parents find it in your house. It's like, such a monster, you know?

I do have a question. Yes, I just got one. It's this, like, steel.

Okay.

Because I read that it's, like, for the G spot, like, the most perfect thing.

Okay.

This is like, steel, sort of.

It's a crowbar, Jack.

Looks like a crowbar. The enjoy. The enjoy. Yeah. Okay. So that's like a dild. Well, it's more like a dildo. Cause it doesn't vibrate. But that one.

It's so heavy. It's like £10.

No, literally, like, your luggage. You have to check your luggage and stuff. It's so. It's so heavy. But that is the, like, holy grail of if that's how you. Yeah. Have you tried it?

I tried it once, but then it's intense.

Because the thing about that is that it's like. It's like. It's still.

You could, like, do, like, arm lifts.

You could really, like, bring it, like weights or G Spot. Because the thing about the G spot is you don't need. Necessarily need vibration. It's more of, like, pressure. So that's why. That's just like. It has little balls on the ends. And you just keep pressuring it. And that works, too. But you gotta play with it. That's the thing with juice. But it's so hard, right? Being women, you gotta, like, work hard.

But once life's hard enough. Emily also.

I know, like, who's that Time? But it's Kinda. It's kinda. Kinda worth it. Right? So I love that you guys already came in with questions. We're already going, but I should have.

Like, written some down.

No, no, believe me, there's gonna be more coming up. Because I just wanna say that it was awesome on your show and I wanted just. You guys, let's just start going around just saying who you are real quick and your. What you do, your social media. Jack, would you like to start?

My name is Jack Vanik. I own a clothing line and my social media is Ackvanek Everywhere.

Okay. Love it. Love your clothing line. Thank you.

You have a few new pieces.

I know I. I have them here because I was gonna do a little fashion thing. Okay, thank you.

I got a fashion body for radio.

I'm just saying. Exactly. And I was like, yeah.

Faces for radio.

Becca Tobin. I used to have a face for television and then I turned 30 and now I do a podcast.

Perfect.

And my Instagram is Becca Tobin. Don't bother following me on Twitter. I don't do anything there. Definitely. It's dead.

And that's it.

And it's also an embarrassing name still.

Yeah.

Beck. Beck.

Bo Beck.

Slash. Amazing.

Hello, I'm Keltie Knight and I am the one with the most questions. My Twitter. Cause I'm an old person and Instagram is Elty Knight. But most importantly, we don't really care about our personality. Yeah, we don't care about us at the lady gang.

Yes.

Tell me about your. Your own words about your podcast, Kelsey.

Basically, you know, we all kind of work in some way in Hollywood, and it's just like, even the magazines and the covers and all these celebrity interviews, it's like so airbrushed and so PC. And so this is what my publicist told me to say, and this is what we've promised. That you don't really ever get a real role model and you don't ever really get to have a real conversation about stuff. And so we just. No holds barred. We talk from everything. Like we had you on talking about sex, but we talk about the disappointments about body image, about our skin, about, you know, our lives, our biggest disappointments. How we stay inspired, you know, kind of a little bit of everything. And we're not afraid to call out things that we absolutely hate and we're not allowed. We celebrate things we love.

Yeah, right. I loved it. I felt. I mean, you guys were like. I was sitting there. Cause you guys did your opening part about your good week, bad week. Is that it is. And you're like. I'm like, God, they're all so beautiful. Like, you guys are so hot and done. Like, God, now I'm feeling kind of bad. No, really, you guys are amazing and hot and smart, and I loved being on the show, and it was awesome. Thank you. But. Okay, I want to get into some, so. Oh, I also wanted to ask you your relationship status, because we're going to get in some dating, and then we're going to move into a little bit of sex. Okay.

Boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

Disgustingly cute.

I know. Okay, we've seen your Instagram.

Everybody hates it.

Is it real? Like, is it real? It's like a catalog.

No, he's the most amazing person in the entire world.

Is there in the cocaine. Is there. It's a proven thing. There's like the cocaine stage where, like, your first few months of dating.

Yeah. Honeymoon phase.

Yeah, she's in the honeymoon phase.

That's what I.

Celebrating it.

Oh, wait. I wanted to mention that Jack. Jack was already on the podcast.

Yeah.

So I meant to mention that you had just met him, like, five minutes earlier, and that was an awesome pod. I. I loved that podcast with you guys. That was super fun. And that was a really popular podcast, and it was called Fashion Do's and Don'ts. So Fashion Do's and Dating Don'ts. That was a frigging blast.

And we talked a little bit about Tinder, which is. It's funny because when we have our good week, bad week, we don't have the guest talk. And now I know how hard it is not being able to talk. So I wanted to be like Tinder.

Bumble. I know everything about that.

Right, Exactly. I know. So I love this story. So you guys met directly on Tinder?

I matched with his best friend on Tinder.

So how does that work?

I don't know. I matched with his best friend, and then his friend was like, oh, you know, my friend's Scott, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, don't know who that is. But I looked him up on Facebook and I'm like, no, this is the hottest guy I've ever seen. So I'm gonna start messaging him instead. And.

And now you've been together a few months now?

Yeah, like four months.

Okay. Yeah. They're still not honeymoon page, but that's good. Yeah, they got great shots and they're having fun.

Yeah, all the shots.

I love it. Okay.

Relationship for about a year.

Oh, okay.

Yeah. So we're out of the cocaine phase.

Not having sex anymore. Netflix. Right? Yeah.

The angry phase.

No, we're still in it because we are sort of long distance.

Oh, good.

We travel a lot, so when you get together it's still like, you know, some fireworks.

Is it LA long distance or for real?

Is he in Venice and you're in Hollywood?

No, it's Atlanta.

Oh, okay.

That's for real. That's for real.

Legit. Yeah.

Okay.

It's good for the sex life, I believe.

A little distance.

I think it's good.

Honestly, I'm sure Emily would love it.

We love long distance and not committing all the time. Right. It's fun. Okay.

Kelty. I am in a long distance relationship with my husband who lives in my house because we are both workaholics and I travel a ton for work and so we have completely different schedules. I get up at like 4 in the morning and I go to bed at like 7pm and Chris gets up at like 10am and gets home at like 8 or 9. So we miss each other like most of the time ever. But we've been together six years, three years married this summer and I still really like him. There can still be. I did have a dream last night that we got divorced.

I fell out of love with him.

I fell out of love with him in my dream. Like, I don't. I had to have the conversation of like, I don't love you anymore in my dream. Then I woke up this morning and I still thought I didn't love him. And I went to work and then I like shook my head off and I was like, wait, this was not real. Anyway.

I hate when that happens.

The marriage can like mess, you know? This is what I thought was so great about when you came on our episode is because you, you are teaching us so much. And it's so interesting that people are in four months, a year, six years, like we all learn something and you're just so talented and like, it's just awesome.

Oh, thanks guys. I feel right back at you. I was sitting there going, these are some talented chicks. I love them. So I'm so glad you're here.

If you want to do a blog post about like lesbian friendship girl crushes, then we could like have a make out together.

Let's do those. Oh yeah, wait, I have a girl crush. On you. Go. Same mutual girl crushes. What did you mean? Can I be? I kind of want to be part of the lady gang like you can.

You do.

I'd be like an understudy.

You can be an understudy.

Can I be like, if someone comes in sick Yep. Not too sick. Like a cold. I could be an understeer. Okay, perfect. Nothing bad. I don't want anyone to die or anything.

You're in.

Okay, cool. What would you say, Jack?

Oh, I was gonna say another thing that I loved when you guys were talking earlier is your drunk episode.

You've inspired us. We're doing a drunk episode?

Like, oh, my God, you guys had some drinks. But.

I was gonna say our Dr. Episodes.

Kelty has.

I've had some drunk episodes before.

We haven't, which is weird.

Yeah, we've tried, but we were always in a.

We were at cbs. We were at the radio station.

Yeah. We're at, like, big companies in their workspace, and we couldn't get plastered while everybody else was sober, but.

Are you in a relationship?

I am.

Are you worried that you might get drunk and me.

Oh, no, no, no.

Joking. What? Open with me.

No, I'm. I've been professionally drinking because I work. I've been working radio for, like, what, 18 years now? So I know how to handle myself, sorta.

Except when he gets drunk and falls down in Mexico.

Not my fault they didn't have slip mats on the. On the ground.

He just gashed his head in Mexico and bled on the ground.

They wanted me to get stitches, but I said I wasn't a pussy, so.

Oh, that's all good.

That's how you handle.

They wonder if we would hook up. People don't ask us anymore. They used to say, like, you guys didn't hook us up.

Yeah, but no, I've. I've railed on you so many years. I don't think they all.

Yeah, it's gonna happen.

I have to say, like, after Emily was on our show, like, I was definitely horny.

Oh, that's so good.

I'm completely flaccid every time we do the show.

But if you at least finished.

Flaccid. Stayed flaccid. It's okay. Were you. So did you go home that, like, What? Did you guys.

Oh, yeah.

Did you have sex?

Did you have sex?

I wanted to so bad, and then I fell asleep.

Okay. But that's a start.

But I definitely thought about it the whole way home, and I was like, I'm gonna go in there and I'm gonna light the camera candle that you gave us, and I'm gonna have this wild night. And then I was like, ooh. Or this hello Kitty onesie. That sounds nice, too.

Oh, my God. Damn it.

Those ones.

Okay, well, I'm working.

I'm working on it.

Do you like the candles? Okay, wait. Okay. We're working on it. I have some. We'll give you stuff.

Okay, wait.

But I know more gifts. Okay, so when I was on your podcast, you asked me the most common question I get asked, which is, why can't I have an orgasm during sex? And so I want to know from you guys if you're comfortable. Are you? Can you orgasm during intercourse?

I can with my current boyfriend, but I couldn't for a long time before that.

Oh, my God. He's staying around longer than four months at least. You could never before that. And what do you think it is, Jack? Say that.

Are you thinking because you're super into him, because he's, like, hot and stuff?

Well, I think it's number one that we're in love, which I wasn't in love with people I was sleeping with.

It's like your first love. Okay.

But then also, it's just. I don't know, it's just we fit better together than I did with other people.

I think. Packing.

What?

Bigger than.

And he's packing.

Yeah, she talked about in the last one, we got some emails from people, right?

Oh, really?

Yeah, no, like, they're like, tall. He's tall. Has a big penis.

Like, yeah, he's six, seven.

You gotta hope he has a. Oh, geez.

But sometimes you're disappointed by the tall ones, right? Right. Yes.

I mean, these groupies that hang out with basketball players, sometimes they say they have heard this. Really small wieners.

That's. Okay. So how about your organ?

Like, yes, I can.

Wow. Yeah, I know. Look at Kelsey.

Are you shocked?

Do you not.

It's not my turn.

Okay. Yeah, no, I do.

We're a very good sexual match. That's great.

Yeah. He's really. You know when you just sort of. You like having sex the same way? Not. Not the same way like this each time, but just your. Your energy is the same. Like, we're good at matching each other.

Yeah, that's good.

Yeah.

But don't you say, like, it's like 80% out there, something like that.

20, 30% can. So you guys are like, really?

That shocks me.

It's true.

I can totally get that.

Yeah, you can get that. You can.

No, I mean, that makes sense.

Yeah. It's so hard. You got to feel comfortable. You got to know your own body.

And we're talking about how it's such a mental thing for women.

It's such a mental thing. You got to get out of the, like, oh, I didn't turn off that you know, I gotta go pick up my dry cleaning or the phone's ringing. You just. You gotta, like, block all that out. Kelsey's an excited to answer this question.

No, no, listen. I'm gonna keep it real for, like, a whole bunch of ladies that don't want to feel like they can't do something everybody else can't.

Well, you're talking to, like, 80% of the women that's listening to this podcast.

I cannot. But I will say this, that my husband is the best sex I've ever had. And this is why he's a learner. Like, you were talking about how you need to communicate. Chris and I, I'm so safe because we have such a. Like, a deep love that we've been able to really communicate and teach each other what's amazing. And I'm a big fan because I can't or haven't figured out how to get there yet. What we do is we'll, like, have home sex, and then I always have, like, little. Those little vibrators, you know, Like.

Yeah.

And then, like, we'll. Whatever. And then I'll, like, put the vibrator on my clit while he's having sex with me, and then it's, like, mind blowing. It's so great.

Yeah, exactly.

And that's, like, my favorite.

Yeah. And that's why I'm so glad you said that, Kelty, because I was just gonna say to you, it doesn't matter.

I guess I kind of read that's Emily's favorite thing. She's always.

No, same with me. I gotta say that that's. That's me too. Like, I want a little clitoral vibe during intercourse. And that's how I do it, too, I gotta say. So there's nothing. I guess I shouldn't have started. Like, do you. Can you. Are you guys the special ones? No, I'm just. I guess she was wondering if you guys orgasm, like, clitorally or vaginally or however you do it. But you figured it out, so. Yeah, there's no reason.

I very rarely have sex without having an orgasm, which I think a lot of people lie and they, like, try to get it over with or, you know, when you're busy or whatever and you're like, I just want to get him happy. Like, my husband is. Someone's, like, always, like, no, no, no, this is. And then it's like a workout, right? Like when you're tired and you're like. And you're exhausted and, like, life just gets really busy. You're like, oh my God, I need to, like, I want to have sex with my husband. I gotta like, keep him happy. Sometimes that can be like a load on you if you're not in the mood. You know what I mean? But it's like a workout. Like you never regret a workout you never regret. Like having an or.

Exactly. Right.

Like you were saying.

Yes.

Once you get going, you're like, oh, wow, why was I ever like, oh, maybe I don't wanna do so that's.

The most true thing I've ever heard.

Right.

Like it's. That's hits the nail, right?

Because I was saying that it's like a lot of you are like, oh, I don't want to have sex. I'm not in the mood. But it's like once you get going and you have the sex, you're like, eh, Then you're in the mood and.

Then your skin's all glowy and like, you feel nice and you're happy.

Right? It's totally true. So I have a question about. Okay, so you guys all figured out your own orgasms, which is awesome. And you're all in relationships, so. Because I had some dating questions, but I feel like you guys are in relationships, so I want to know.

About orgasms. About. Okay, okay. Can we talk about blowjobs for a minute?

Skip the orgasms.

You just love them or hate them.

I hate them.

I hate them too.

I would rather clean a toilet than give a blowjob.

What did you say on our show that one time that you had the bet going on with your cast or something? What would you rather do?

Oh, we were playing what would you rather do instead? Instead of give a blow job. And there were amazing.

Amazing.

That's amazing.

I said pick up garbage on the 405.

Well, okay, I take it back. If I've had a couple cocktails, it is enjoyable. But like, I just. I have a weird thing about spit. I hate spit.

Oh, me too.

And I also like the girls that can like, wake up in the morning and like, go down there. Number one, you haven't brushed your teeth. That makes me want to vomit. Also, he hasn't showered. He's been sleeping all night in his bald vinegar.

Bald vinegar. You're so right.

So I'm just like a really. I have a good sense of smell, which I hate sometimes. And I just.

I get it, you know? Yep. That's where like, lube comes in too. You just give him a hand job or something? Yeah, yeah. And I've got this blow job spray that you put in your mouth.

Oh, you've been pimping me.

That's what I mean.

Oh, my God.

Wait, what does it do?

Okay, it's the best thing ever. So this woman was on my show. Doc Johnson makes it. I'll bring it next time. I got goodies. But she brought it to me. She goes, oh, she had a show too. And she was like, you know. Cause, you know, sometimes like on the radio, you're like. She's like, oh, it's blowjob spray. So it automatically helps the dry mouth. But she's like, it helps on the radio, but you squirt it in your mouth. And I think it's called Bleff. What's it called now? It's called Good Head Goodhead, and it's by Doc Johnson. It's like $9, and it tastes like strawberry. And it instantly like your mouth. Like, it helps with dry mouth. And you can give a blow Dr. And you could also taste like strawberry. That could help.

I like to give a blowjob for the first minute and a half, and the next eight are hella fast.

Yeah.

But I don't consider that a blow job.

You're talking about like a finish.

Yeah, like, that's fine. I do it often.

But like a full on, like, you start with that and then you have sex.

Yeah.

Oh, you start with that and then have sex. Do you hate that too?

No, I don't hate that. Cause that's like very quick.

I don't.

Full start to finish.

Yeah.

I mean, it's hard on your job.

I know, but that's why you can just do it.

All right, well, you guys hate doing them, but how often do you do them? Like from start to finish in a relationship? Yeah. I don't think, like, if you in. If you're in a relationship for quite a while, I don't think you do it from start to finish.

Right. Cause you're like, let's just have sex.

Yeah, but how often do you do it now that you've been in a relationship for a while? I mean, you're only in four months, so I'm sure you're still doing it here and there.

Yeah, she's still doing a job.

I mean, it's like, mine are always like, I start and then we have sex. Cause he's so excited that, like, you'd rather have sex.

Right.

Which is great. I'm just curious because blowjobs is. Okay, here's my other thing. Is there one thing that gets you turned on every time you have sex? What's your one thing that you're like, oh, now I'm ready to go. I'm just curious if you guys have anything.

I mean, him going down on me, it's like, right?

Oh, you're speaking Emily's language even when.

I'm not in the mood.

And I'm like, no, no. And he's like, yes.

That stops you in your tracks. Literally.

Done.

Every time I would have to say the little. The g. Spotty finger thing. When he does it, Wally's going down on me.

Right? That is like the fingers, which is so interesting. We talked about this. That some women like the fingers during oral, some people don't. But yeah, it's got turned on. Okay. Which is amazing. I can still get turned on after talking about sex for 10 years. But that's what I was wondering.

Two things. I like a guy. I like a husband.

I like the one.

No, I like, my husband has, like, big hands. And I like when he like, grabs me, like, I'm gonna kiss you now. And, like, I'm gonna, like, hold you with my big manhole.

Yeah.

And it's funny because I'm such like a. A type aggressive human being that I'm always doing. And so when someone can, like, get control of me, that's really hot. I also love neck kissing.

Oh, I know.

Like, it's very romantic and it's totally underrated.

I.

People don't kiss your neck.

Also anything in the ear.

Yeah, I agree. You guys do know that it's very. Those are highly erogenous zones for men and for women, but especially for women, the neck and the ear. But it's like, they do it on the first date. You're so right, Kelty. Underrated. And I don't know why men don't kiss your neck soft.

It's like when you're not having sex with someone when you're first dating and you're just doing the deep makeouts, there's always neck and it's so hot. And then when you can get to the main event, they like, skip the neck.

Yeah.

Yeah. I think this is why I always say, like, you gotta go five times slower than you thinks. Actually, for guys, my tip is always, like, slow it down because we, like, we need the build up, like the foreplay. So, like me, obviously, you guys are like fans of fort me. Sometimes you wanted to have sex.

Sometimes it's like, I don't know. Sometimes I'm just like, let's just like, do it right now. I know once if I'm not In the mood. Foreplay actually doesn't help so much.

Except for going down.

Yeah, Right. But all the other stuff, it's like, if you just, like, start, then I'm in it. So the foreplay, it's like a hit or miss?

It depends.

Because sometimes you're like, I. I need to go fast. And that person's like, I'm going to be Fabio and make the greatest luck.

And you're in your life.

I gotta be somewhere in five minutes. I need to get.

That's why I really enjoy shower sex.

Oh, shower sex is so fun.

It's efficient, it's clean. You don't like, shower afterwards? Yeah, you're already there. I just think shower sex is great.

No, you're right.

Your boyfriend's tall. How do you do that? Do you have a step stool? What the.

I'm just, like, way on my tippy toes. And he's in, like, a deep squat.

Chris can't get down low enough. My husband's 6 5. He's very tall as well. And, like, he can't. Like, he would. I don't know. It's very uncomfortable.

What about when you bend over? Don't have a position in my book. I'm bringing you guys my book. But there's a page in there about bending over and grabbing your ankles.

You gotta watch out, though. If it's too hot, you can pass out. That happened in Palm Springs once.

I also have an above shower.

I thought I killed somebody, drowning me.

And then it's not that big, so I'd be like, scrunched up in the corner.

It's usually like Vegas shower, hotel rooms and stuff like that, where you get.

A lot of shower, vacation sex. So fun.

Oh, my God.

At the Venetian or something.

Yeah. Okay. Is there anything that you guys have been wanting to try in bed that you haven't yet you're thinking about?

No, because everything I haven't tried, I'm so disgusted. Disgusted by, like, I will die an anal virgin.

Oh, really?

Say no to anal.

No.

Okay. Never. Okay. And is your partner cool with that? Is he, like. Yeah.

Thank God, right?

He's not into it.

He has no interest.

Has he done it before someone else and been disappointed?

I think he has. I don't know, actually. I know I've asked him, but bring it up tonight.

I'm sure he'll love it.

I know.

No.

Not a huge fan either. Got to be honest. And I'm so glad the last guy's dating. He's like, nah, not my thing. I'm like, thank God. Like, I've tried. Of course. Have to try everything once, but. Yeah, I mean, a few times I've tried everything.

I don't mind. Like, I actually. I love, like, tongue and stuff happening around there, but I would not like a big object in my butt.

No, but you're right. The little tongue. Little tongue.

I love it.

It goes to Roger Stone as well. The outer, you know, part of your anus is very sensitive, that whole area. Kelsey's going, I don't want any licking there. No. Do you? Oh, I don't.

I'm waiting. The fifth on this one in the car.

I got it.

What that means.

Okay, what about threesomes? Anyone have a threesome?

I'm gonna say no to that, but.

Well, should we have a lady gang threesome?

And just like you do every week, have your lady gang threesome. Right? But it's.

We don't penetrate.

I think the idea, like, not yet.

The idea of having, like, I always get very turned on when I watch another woman hit on my husband. Because often, like, I don't. We're, like, real bad. Like today, like, we always forget our wedding rings. And so, like, I'll be at a Starbucks and he'll be getting this drink and bring it over, and I'll watch other girls checking him out or, like, whatever, trying to get his eye. And then I'm like, my man, I love you. Like, you know, that's.

Is he super hot?

That's mine.

You guys all have super hot boyfriends, I'm sure.

I don't think Chris is classically super hot, but I fixed him up a lot. Like, when we first met, he was a fixer upper.

Yeah. Oh, you fixed him up.

That's why I always say you should go with the nice guy. Because sometimes a nice guy doesn't have the best shoes or the best clothes or, like, is so suave, but you.

Can buy that stuff.

You can train them to. To, like, be the man of your dreams.

How did you train him?

I think just with Chris, like, he was such a good guy, and he is such a giver, and I'm an excellent communicator about what I need. Like, hey, when I say, don't get me anything for my birthday, it means throw me a surprise party. Like, things that, like, I had to teach him, you know, And a little bit about clothes. Like, when you're 6 5, and you're wearing, like, clothes from the Gap or whatever. Like, you have to customize make your suits, you have to custom make your shirts so that everything Fits. Like, I turned him from, like, a regular guy to a GQ guy. He's, like, so cute, you know? And just about, like, what you were talking about when you came on our show, like, about communication in, like, sex. I think that works in all relationships. Like, men can't read our minds. And so the best gift I've ever given us is, like, we just communicate like this. What do you want? What do you need? Can you please. Here's the thing. Our life is busy. I need you to be the grocery person. I need to be this person.

Exactly.

You know, all of that, like, is.

That the kind of stuff. You got it, right? You got. You can't just fight about it. Like, just talk about it.

And interestingly enough, when I was. When you had on the show and I was listening, it's like. Then it started a whole conversation about, like, how much sex do you need? How much sex do I need? Like, what? You know, it started.

Oh, did you guys actually talk about.

It this whole conversation?

Did he listen to the show?

It's very interesting.

Yeah. I love this.

He said, here's the thing, is that there's not a number. He's like, I want to have sex. Whenever you are really into it. He's like, don't ever have sex just to have sex. He's like. Because that is like the biggest insult.

What about naked stretching? Was he cool?

He loves naked stretching.

I love naked stretches. Naked stretches. Just since she doesn't want to have sex, but she'll naked stretch.

I really want you to come out with like a yoga mat for the bed for naked stretching.

Yeah, you need to do that.

Okay, I'll do it.

We can do it together and then make a video. A non slip sheet.

I'm sure there's porn where girls are just doing naked yoga.

Oh, I'm sure it was probably porn. Yes, I did naked yoga once. I know. I just remembered that I did in.

Like, a group of people.

Well, it was. Yes.

No, it was like on a retreat or something.

Yes, it was. Okay. So I did this thing in San Francisco called Oming. You remember this? The.

Yeah.

It's such a magical shit meditation.

Wait a minute.

What is this? I know, right? It's the.

It's a bunch of pervy dudes that want to rub vaginas for, like, days on end.

They're not pervy. They're there to help you.

Complete bullshit.

So they do they. Yeah, these guys. You go in and it was really was research. Okay. Okay.

I'm not gonna say shit. Just listen to the description.

This is the definition of pervy guys, though. But continue.

Just go ahead. I won't even jump in. Just describe it and then you guys give the reaction.

Okay, here we go.

Okay. So it's called orgasmic meditation. And you go in and these guys are there. I don't think they do this anymore, but they live in a house with. With women. A lot of they live and they like it. Almost like they ring a bell, like three times a day. And you have your partner, they might match you for like, a few weeks. I did not live in the house, by the way. But then they. They. They have this technique where they stroke the clitoris and it's not sexual. Like, they don't have sex with the person and they. They stroke the upper left quadrant of the clitoris. They teach this technique. This man just strokes it. They have the stroking cream for 15 minutes.

How are you doing when you're doing this?

You're lying down on pillows and you're comfortable, and the point is not to bring you to orgasm, but they have this thing of, like, going. You don't want to go over, but it's like your sexual energy flows through and blah, blah. To be honest, I did it for a week.

How did they find volunteers? I don't know.

Can I be honest with. The guys that were there were not. They were like. They felt. The men that I talked to and I interviewed him after. The guy owned me all weekend. He came on my show and then talked. You met him. He was not pervy. Huh.

Was he attracted?

He was some nerd.

That this was a rough vagina.

But they really. I think that a lot of guys are confused by the vagina. Right? They're confused by the whole thing. And they. A lot of them feel like they really felt it wasn't about their pleasure, but they learned how to connect.

Wait, so were you, like, with an amateur guy?

No, he was like a professional omer.

Okay.

So you go in as women, as like, you're just.

You just show up to some building, and then you just hang out there and random dudes rub your vagina. That's.

You go in the back alleyway to get that dumpster.

I have a friend that does this, like, her regular practice.

Is this the only right in San Francisco? In San Francisco?

No, she's here.

She's in Venice. Yeah, they do, right? Of course. But. But I did it just for a weekend. But the thing is, there was this couple there that. And they had, like, flew. Fallen in from somewhere. I don't want to like out of the country. And they were like, paying for a weekend. Like, this woman wanted to live her fantasy out. So they. The weekend I happened to do it, they were like, oh, can you come do this special thing? And this couple that were married, they wanted. He wanted to make all of her fantasies come true. And one of her fantasies was to do naked yoga. So the weekend that I was there doing this. Oh my. I didn't live there. I was like, went a few times, like, he wants to naked yoga class. There was like 10 of us that I like, did naked, yo. I was like. Because I'm kind of like, why not try everything? Like, once. And I did that once. Was it.

Did you down, dog.

I was in the front row because I was like, I don't want to, like, see balls like in front of me, like, and I. So I did every. Men and women I know, I blocked this moment.

So many jerk off sessions after perhaps or not.

Was there any boners? You don't know. I didn't look. You know yoga, you're just kind of in your space. But I just kind of remembered that I did that. I know that you only. I have some questions for you. So that's my naked yoga experience.

I'm gonna ask you. I've got five questions that I ask everyone. I'm gonna ask you all. I'm trying to think if I should go. Okay, so your biggest. And you go around each one of answers. We'll go back. Biggest turn on Jack.

Well, we kind of had this conversation on our podcast, but just.

My answer is the same. Having your man just be super turned on by you, I think is the biggest turn on.

Yeah, I like it.

Mine's power, Becca.

Pow. What do you mean when a man has power?

Like when he's in a powerful position or like showing, like, doing what he's good at, you know what I mean? Or like commanding, you know?

Right.

I don't know. Not like Hitler.

Let me clarify.

Yeah, yeah.

You know, just taking charge.

I like someone who takes charge in.

The bedroom or in life. Like when you see like.

Like if I see him just handling business, it's like, that's hot.

Yeah, that is hot.

That is so hot. I think that is like a great lesson for all men out there. Just like, yeah, own your shit.

Don't be a pussy. Yeah, right. Menace.

Exactly. Be confident. We always talk about being confident because you'll get friend zoned so quick all the time.

Just bring on the confidence.

Look, if a girl's not into you, you're not going to die if she says, you know what? I don't think. I think we should just be. Be friends, but find out right away. Don't.

Right. Don't do the friends on stuff.

Be a puss and hang out with.

Change your tires and pick her up the airport. Why does she want to bang maids? Because you did all you find out.

Just find out if she's interested and if she's not and she's a cool person, you want to hang out with her, fine. Awesome. You know? But just find out right away. Don't waste time.

Okay.

I friend zone so many people in my 20s. I know the amount of people that helped me with my groceries in New York that I know they were in love with me, that I was like, no chance. So many.

Yeah, but. But if they were straight up with you and wanted, you know, find out if you were in. If you're into them or not, you would give them a straight up answer, Correct?

Yeah, I might. Well, I might have did.

After the grocery.

You give a girl a couple cocktails and she still doesn't try to at least make out with you. You're not in. You're never getting in. It's not happening. So, like, get it over with.

Yeah.

Biggest turn on is I agree with Becca Power. Like, when you watch anyone doing their shit and doing it so, so well. And then I like, I'm all about that mood thing. Like the candles and the warmth and.

The, like, the warmth. I keep thinking about you.

Like a nice, like, deep Sparks by Coldplay playing in the background. I like everything to be like a movie, you know? Like, I want to feel like I'm all about the ambiance of it. Like, I need a clean, nice sheet and a nice smell. Like I'm very.

So no Angels and Kings bathroom for you?

I mean, not this time. Jack. Thanks for bringing that.

Okay, Jack. Biggest turn off.

Oh, God, there's so many.

Probably it's bad breath or stinky.

Just hygiene. Okay, stinky.

That was bad.

Biggest turn off.

Okay, sexual turn off is bad breath, but turn off in general is someone who's cheap. Oh, I can't deal with a cheap person.

Right.

Also on confidence.

I guess for me it's poor dental hygiene. Like, if you're not flossing and brushing with fresh breath and, like, a nice chapstick. Like, I need your whole mouth to be pristine because that's the mouth that's gonna kiss me. And I'm a vegetarian. And so if you're a meat eater especially, you have to have Incredible delta hygiene. Because if there's any remnants of your meat dinner. We're not having sex after dinner. Do you know what I mean? Like, you need to be hungry.

Is he vegetarian?

He eats meat, so it's like, you know, he's a brusher.

Yeah.

You don't have to.

Is there any remnants of meat?

I think it's so gross.

There's a great product. It's called Smart Mouth. I recommend to everybody.

What is it? What is it?

It keeps your breath fresh for like 12 hours.

What?

Yeah, I think you can get out, like, Target or something like that.

Smart Mouth.

Yeah.

Everyone's writing down.

Yeah. No, it's like. No, it's just like mouthwash, but it's weird. It's a weird bottle where it pours out two different kinds of liquid and then you just use that. It works really well.

You guys have so many good products on this.

Yeah, I mean, I don't get. It's not an endorsement. I don't get paid. Smart Mouth.

Oh, double activated.

Yeah, do it.

Twelve hours. We're gonna try it.

Do it.

Okay. Menace, do you want to bring back. You know, these. These are. Remember. Do you remember early on, I used to the top. I used to have every guest five questions. Do you remember this? Like, yeah. So this is. I'm actually bringing this back. So these are a little bit new ones. Okay, so biggest. We all did the biggest trap. Okay. Craziest place you've had sex.

We've just heard this on the podcast before.

Not on mine, though. Maybe I'll say we don't know you, but now everyone's in the love of.

Lady gang on the roof of a sushi restaurant.

We, like, climbed up on the roof that was like, off limits and had sex up there overlooking Manhattan Beach.

Cool. I like it.

It's pretty fun.

Okay, good.

Mine was in high school on the 50 yard line. Whoa. After hours. I grew up in the South. That was a big thing.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

That's such a big high school.

Football is used in the south and the Midwest. I'm from Michigan. That was like our front lines.

Jack had teased me about this earlier, but you didn't know what you were talking about. I had sex in the bathroom at Angels and Kings in New York. Does Angels and Kings.

I don't know what Angels and Kings.

No, you were just like, it's like a dive bar, and it's the size of this room, and it is. It's disgusting. And it was during a time of grave eras. I used to be wild. Oh, I used to be a real crazy because I was really desperate, and I would do a lot of things like me. And then I grew up.

Okay. That happens. You grow up. Okay. Got crazy. Okay. Sexiest word to you, Jack.

Oh. Oh, my God.

I like baby girl for some reason.

That's sweet.

Yeah.

Okay.

But like, in a sexy way right now.

Like, baby girl.

I guess I know it's top of my head.

That's right, baby girl. I like it.

I don't know this one. Do you have one?

Yeah, I do.

It could be your name.

My love. My husband always calls me my love. Doesn't matter where we are. We can be at the grocery store, my love. Do we need apples? In front of his family?

I love that.

My love. Did you get the stuff from the car? And to me, like, my love, where's my pants? On the floor. Because we're having sex. Because you call me my love. I love that. And I think it's very romantic and it's cool.

I like it. Okay, last one is. What's the one thing you wish guys knew about women and sex? Like, if you could talk to guys, you're like, why don't they know?

I would say going down on a girl. Slow down.

That's a good one. Becca.

The area around the vagina hole is important.

Labia.

Not just penetration.

Right.

With a vibrator, like, sometimes to just get you in that place where it's going around the area and not directly on. Like, people, they think there's two stops, the hole and the clit. And there's like a thousand.

Oh, yeah.

Go around all the time. There's so many nerve endings. It's not just that whole area. Yeah.

You could spend so much time.

Becca, don't get out of that.

Come on.

I know. I'm trying to think. Well, we talked about the dryness thing on our podcast, how you're like, it doesn't matter if you're super turned on. Sometimes you're just not wet. Like, if I have cocktails, it does not matter. I could have, like, I could be so turned on. And it can be a desert. I'm dehydrated.

That's true.

And so that, I think, is, like, a nice public service announcement to men that, like, don't worry. We are still in the mood if.

We'Re saying yes, it is perfect announcement. It doesn't mean anything.

I'm just drunk and I don't drink enough water.

You should give me a water.

No, but I think in general, like, have you ever been sitting on your Couch or out on a date and you're watching a sexy movie and there's some sex scene going on, and then you're feeling sad because you're like, that's not my life. Cause it's so ridiculous fast and it's hot and the lighting's amazing and they're doing, like wild acrobatics and you're like, I'm so lame. But I don't know, I guess just like, love is not like the movies. Like, it's not like porn. Yeah, it's just like.

Like porn.

A little more than that.

You know, you're so right. I actually like that. Slow down. Right?

I totally agree.

Well, okay, you guys, thank you so much. How can. How can everyone. Do you guys all have to go?

Yeah, you guys, this was awesome. Yeah. Okay.

Do you have to go to the Harry Potter event tonight? Like I did.

Give me a wand, please.

Yes. They have special wands there that make things. Do things throughout the park. I don't know. I have to go there for work.

That's so funny.

I can't. I have to love that. Okay, you guys, thank you so much. Lady Gang podcast.

Yes.

Yes. And they can find you. We are at Lady Gang.

The Lady Gang on Twitter, Instagram, Twitter.

And we'll have this all on the website. You guys, thank you so much for being here. It was awesome. Thank you. You are welcome.

You have the best podcasters and you're such an inspiration to all lady podcasters out there to tell the truth and be funny and cute and have great.

Hair and be yourself and do what you love.

And great arms. What do you do to work out?

Thank you. I, you know, I do a lot of different things. I do soul cycle. I do yoga.

I do push ups, naked stretching, naked yoga, baby.

I don't do big rum, but I do a little bit of everything.

We love you, Emily.

I love you guys. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you. Bye. Bye. Oh, my God, they were awesome. Menace, do you love those girls?

Yeah, they were great.

Okay, thank you. Lady Gang podcast. Everyone should check out their podcast, and when we come back, we'll be answering your emails. And now a quick word from our sponsors.

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Love it.

Dear Emily, I love your show and I've enjoyed it over the past five years. So back in 2000 I met my dream girl. We both immediately knew we were in love and had a very intense 1.5 year relationship. We even bought a house together. That ended when I got accepted to a top business school and she wasn't willing to move. It got messy and very emotional for both of us. Fast forward six seven years. We are both married and she also has a kid. After seven years of complete silence, suddenly she called me this January to tell me that she had forgiven me, was finally at peace and was sorry. I told her the same and that a day that not a day had passed without me thinking about her. Which is entirely true. We've exchanged a few friendly no flirting, nothing appropriate texts since then. And last week she called again. This time she tells me that she had a very intense dream, one where we lived together. Then she moved out and then she moved back in. She said it was so vivid she could remember every detail. The metaphor to me was pretty clear. So here we are. Since I was at work we left it open to talk again and have a proper catch up. If it was any other woman, I would use my rational thought to ignore the call and go about my life with my wife. However, my emotions are so strong for her. I still think about her at some point every day. I know I still love her until the day I die. I love my wife very much, but I can't stand seem to ignore these emotions very much. Look forward to your thoughts, Chris.

I have a ton of thoughts, but go ahead.

Well, I was going to say that it's understandable. Well, I don't believe in that one who got away theory. People like think, oh, who got away? Who got away? You know what? Nobody got away. You know why? Because when you were with that person at whatever time in your life, it wasn't right for whatever circumstances. You weren't ready. He was going to business school, you weren't mature enough, you were living in another city. No one gets away because they didn't work at that time in your life. So I don't believe in going back and looking back at regrets and all that. Just keep moving forward. We like to dwell on the past. Loves, they don't exist.

It just sounds enticing. Probably, maybe bored. And you know, being married for a number of years, I had this happen to a buddy of mine. He had a great family, him and his wife had a couple kids and I believe that she was just bored. And she reconnected with her long lost love from high school on Facebook and it was something new and enticing and exciting and blah, blah. She left him, went and hooked up with this guy. And I don't think it worked out for her.

Right.

Because it's just, it just seems exciting at the time. And you again, when you always go back and look at past relationships, most of the time you think about the good times, not the bad times.

Right. You have this euphoric recall.

Unless you had some really bad times, then that pops up. But yeah, the good times mostly pop up.

Right, exactly. So I have to say that when I was reading this email, I hadn't read it, I was reading through it and I was thinking, oh, he's unhappy with his wife and so maybe he's gonna up with her. But the fact that he ended it saying he's so happy with his wife and he loves his wife, I say here, Chris, I'm so glad you emailed, but you gotta end this with the ex love because it's not healthy. You're in a really good relationship now with your wife and I think you can just call her and say, you know what.

I'm glad we reconnected, I wish you the best. But I don't think it's that you can't carry on A relationship with her, because this is going to seep into your current relationship and you're in a good place right now with your wife. And I think you just gotta end it. You can always think fondly of her, but I would not continue down this road. And you didn't miss anything. And she's not the one that got away. And I don't believe any of that. So keep on doing what you're doing.

Don't destroy your relationship in your marriage just because you wanna have fun. Flirting over text.

Exactly. But yeah, exactly. Okay. Hey, Emily. I hope all is well on the west coast. I'm a 28 year old male who just moved from Texas to Nashville about two months ago to start my doctorate degree. I also started listening to your podcast about two months ago and I have to admit, I really enjoy it. You offer great advice, perspective on sex, relationship, et cetera.

Because it's the only, like the best podcast out there. That's why.

Exactly. What else is there? My field of studies, small herpetology, Wildlife diseases. It sounds like herpetology. Okay. Predominantly male. Recently, I was at a conference and wanted to approach a woman. She's really pretty and her research is so cool, but there were so many guys flying around at the evening social. By the time she finally had room to breathe, she looked exhausted and soon left to go back to her hotel room. I was disappointed I didn't get a chance to meet her. But the field is small and everyone attends the same regional conferences, so I know I'll see her again. My question is, when I do see her again, how do I not seem like all the other dudes and get her attention with such little time? Literally. There's small conference rooms too. There's a little time, little room. On a side note, I get it. In a way, I'm kind of like all the other dudes at the conference. We're in the same field, we're attracted to a particular woman and I'm at the same conference as them. But hey, I bet those nerds don't listen to sex with Emily. Thanks for your help. Ciao, Brent. So Brent wants to stand out. He wants to stand out and he wants to make a good impression on this woman. Because when you're a hot woman, there's a lot of guys, especially in a field that's dominated by men, non stop men coming at you like you. I mean, it's hard to kind of differentiate.

What do you think he should do?

I think that he's got to. He's got to make himself Stand out. But I'm not gonna give you any cheesy pickup lines, but I think you should go directly up to her and you should be honest and just be like, you know, if you know something about her work or you have met her, you know, I would just say, I saw you here last time. I'm thinking about you. Let's go grab a drink right now. And I would be something. I would do something really confident and aggressive and I would try to. I would make a plan or I would whisk her out of there and try to take control of the situation.

And if she says no, then what's gonna happen?

He's not gonna die.

He's gonna be okay.

You keep moving on. But don't try to like, just, hey, small taco, we're in the same field. I've seen you, I think for this hot woman who's the one woman in her field who's doing that, she's gotta go in there and just say, hey, I'm Chris Brentwood. You Right, Yeah.

Well, don't. Also, here's a move, like you gotta figure out maybe if she's single or if she's single or not.

I think he would know.

He would.

I don't know. She's there. She's not.

Maybe she's not wearing ring or anything.

Let's say her name. I think, Brent, you should go like, you know. Hey, Beth. What's. I'm Brent. Good to see you again. Let's. Let's go get dinner after this tonight. What are you doing after the conference? Let's get out of here and get a drink. Just be, you know, you can say you've seen her work. It's cool. I like your work.

I just got out of aa.

Burn.

Yeah. Dinner. Let's get some dinner. Let's get some dinner. I want to say, I mean, be. Have the man with a plan because everyone else is like trying to like, you know. Yeah.

Don't ever leave anything open ended. Don't ever tell a woman, say, oh, so would you like to go? We talked about that on the last podcast, which I didn't know that was put out on the Internet is that we had a thing. I talked about that. No, no, I'm just joking. But the we a similar situation where a guy had these text messages and he just gave too many options, you know, too many. It kept it open, ended too much. Just be direct. This is what we want to do. Oh, oh, you're not available that day. How about this day? And she's not available that day, then she's maybe not that interested.

Exactly. That guy was, like, sharing his Google calendar. He was like, 27th, 28th, March 8th.

Do you maybe want to do this? Like, hey, I'm going to go grab something to eat. Do you want to. To come with me?

Right. Exactly.

And if she says, that's a good one again, you're not gonna die. You're just gonna move on the next one now, you know, not to, you know, waste any more time.

Exactly. That's how you make the impression, and you be you and be confident, and that's how you're gonna die.

I feel we've said this so many times, but people just don't believe it and believe in themselves and believe that they can do it. You can. I've. Believe me, I've been that person. I was too shy to ask, or you talk to somebody, but then after a while, you just kind of just get over that, talk to them. And you know what? It works out. It does.

It's funny. It does work out. We get a lot of calls on Loveline. You know, there's a lot of younger listeners, and they. We get a lot of them. They're like, God, I so regret. Like, there was a call last night, a guy called in, and he's like, 21, and he's like, I can't get over it. Last weekend, I was away for the weekend with all my buddies and a bunch of girls from college, and we were all. I ended up sharing a bed with this girl, and the whole night, like, I didn't make a move. And now all week long, he's beating himself up, which is, like, normal to do that, but, you know, to beat yourself up and not have the confidence to make the move. But here's the thing. Like, I think that you learn from those situations, and eventually you just like, you know, what? If I feel like making the move, I'm not gonna second guess it. I'm just gonna do it. And that's something that I think that you learn, like, with age and maybe from having some regrets from not making the move. But, you know, just. You have nothing to lose. And in that moment when you're thinking it, you know, I think that a lot of times we're so afraid of rejection that we're like, oh, maybe she's married. She won't like me. I'm just like every other guy. No, you're not. You're not like every other guy. You're Brent, and you rock Brent. And you just go up to her and you make that plan.

Yeah.

Okay. Dear Emily, so I'm in a great relationship with an amazing lady. We have awesome children, and I can never ask for more. We have amazing communication. She knows all my fantasies. I love to be dominated, spanked, tied up, blindfolded, etc. She humors me a couple times a year, but it isn't her thing. I've also told her about a cuckold fetish of watching her with another man. She said she would never do that. She loves me and doesn't want anyone else. I've let both go with her, but I'm still looking at porn or reading erotica of it, too. But you think it's too much. How do you move on from your fetishes? Thanks for your time and I love the show with your advice and ideas. My wife has gone from orgasm and during sex from about 1 out of 5 times to 4 out of 5. I feel like I could die right now. Thank you, William. He says, thank you, William. Dayton, Ohio. Wait. I'm so happy. Did you hear this? It's one out of five. Four out of five. Love it. I feel great. But it's not about me. Thank you, William. Thank you so much for sharing that. I'm so glad that you're pleasing her. First off, I love V's great sexual communication with his wife. He shared all of his fantasies with her. And great job with the orgasms. High five. But first, let's just talk about the difference between a fantasy and a fetish. So life is a fantasy?

Yeah. A fetish you actually do, and a fantasy you just think about. Correct.

Sometimes some fantasies we keep.

But how can you have a fetish if you never do it?

Well, right. A fetish you definitely. A fetish is something that is required for you to enjoy sex and to achieve orgasm. Like, it becomes like an obsession. Like, you actually can't enjoy sex without that foot. We love talking about foot, but without that foot.

Without nipple clamps, right?

Without, like, you need to have a breast. Like, you need to have a foot there or you can't work it. That's what a fetish is like. It is required. A fantasy are things that, like, turn you on, that you like to think about and that you actually can enhance your sexual experience. Now, what you're talking about, menace, is true. There are some fantasies that we have that we just think about during masturbation, during sex, that we don't actually want to happen. Like, a lot of women have fantasies about, like, having a gang bang. Well, they don't Want that, but they think about it. Turns them out they want some fantasies. No, but some fantasies we do want. Right. So I think that you're talking more about a fantasy and not a fetish.

And so I. So again, these are fantasies you're having, but there's no reason, I don't think that you should. William, stop looking at the porn or reading erotica, especially if it's helping you. You know, he wants his wife to basically cuckold. You know what cuckolding is?

Explain.

Okay, cuckolding is when he would like to watch her have sex with another man.

That can be touchy or she might really enjoy it.

Well, she said no, she doesn't want to do it. So that.

I'm just saying in general, when you try to talk, to have that conversation.

No, totally. Some. Some. Some women are totally down.

Then, yeah, just watch it online. Who cares?

Yeah, exactly.

But that's. You should.

Be excited. I know this is something that you're into, but hey, you know, your woman just wants to be with you. That's kind of cool. I mean, a lot of men out there would really like that. But if this is not your thing, then yeah, just watch it online. Who cares, right?

I mean, I'm thinking that, you know, so with the cuddle thing, people don't really get it. They're like, how could a man want to watch his wife? So it's really like kind of a formative, ethical.

Hulk Hogan just made a hundred plus million dollars off that. You know, I'm saying.

Right, right. He made so much money. Right.

Because the. Allegedly. The. The radio DJ was into that.

Right.

That's what people say.

It's a common.

Not my words.

No. That's not your thing. But, you know, for a lot of guys, it's kind of like a kind of form of S and M. It's sort of emasculating in a way, but it turns you on. But I think that if they look at porn and they read erotica, a lot of time you could do that together. You don't actually have to have her have sex with the other guy, but you could read stories about it, or you could watch porn about it and you could say, like, right now I'm picturing you, like, having sex with this guy. You know, you don't have to drop this fantasy or drop this, you know, entirely, but it could, you know, be used to enhance the sex life that you're already having with your partner. Because, you know, I don't think this is a problem. I don't Think you need to, like, leave your wife or anything because they are very healthy. You guys are in a good place. So again, but it's not necessarily these fetishes you said can you cure if you truly had a fetish. You can't cure people of fetishes. Like, it's not like there's a way, like. Like curing people. Being gay. You can't get rid of a fetish. Like you. Actually, a lot of times it starts in childhood, like certain obsessions and all that stuff.

Like feet and stuff like that.

Exactly. So I think these are just some fantasies. Keep communicating with your wife. She seems super cool that she's down with all this, hearing about all this. I think you guys can just find some compromise. So I don't think you got to give up anything here, but just find a way to work it into your already healthy sex life.

Love it.

Love it. Okay. Thank you so much, William. Thank you, Menace.

Thank you. This is fun.

Awesome. This is. Thank you to the Lady Gang podcast. The Lady Gang was really fun out on itunes. And Menace, we can find you at Menace.

Yeah. Menace on Instagram.

Dog Churro.

My dog, Churro. My little baby. My little French bulldog. If you're into French bulldogs.

Exactly. And I am.

Yeah.

Please find me on Instagram and Twitter and Snapchat at Sex with Emily. Facebook.com Sex with Emily.

She's posting nudes on Snapchat, everybody.

I am right now, actually. You better go there. Oh, it's gonna be good.

So many nudes.

So many nudes.

Dumb nudes.

So little time.

Sex Emily on Snapchat.

Check it out. Okay. Thank you, Menace. Thank you, Madison. Thank you, Nina, Lauren, Jamie.

Can I shout out one of my sponsors?

Lori, you rock.

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Oh, really?

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Yeah, you're not gonna Want to send them back. And I know it's just underwear. Who cares? But I'm telling you, super effing comfortable. They're made out of some material called modal or whatever. Like that.

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Can you show them to me? Can we put on Snapchat the me undies?

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Yeah, please do. Okay. Thanks, everyone, for listening. Was it good for you? Email me feedback with emily.com.

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