What's in Our Box? Sex Toy Review

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Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Bedroom eyes, they call them in a bygone day.

Hey Emily, you got a boyfriend? Cuz my man e here, he just got his heart broken.

He thinks you're kind of cute. A girl's gotta have her standards.

Oh my.

The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common knowledge?

What do you mean? Like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my God, I feel so good. Being bad feels pretty good.

You know, Emily's not the kind of.

Girl you just play with.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com, you can also Comment and subscribe on itunes. I love, love, love when you do that. We read all your comments and it also helps us with the podcast continue to release two shows a week. So thanks for doing that. And also we're exwithemily on social media across the board. Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, all those places. Okay, let's get into the show. Cause I'm excited for this one. It's been a long time since we've done a really fun sex toy review show and I already know it's gon awesome. So. Hi, I'm here with producer Jamie. Hello.

Hello.

Jamie is 25 years old and seeing someone exclusively.

I know, it's so weird.

I know. And Sarah. Sarah has been with us for a while. She's volunteer. She's 25. This is her first actually time on air on the Sex with Emily show. And she is seeing someone as well. But not exclusively. Right? Hi, Sarah.

Exclusively.

Oh, exclusively.

Okay. Sorry, I was not in the. No.

And I'm seeing someone exclusively.

Oh my God. First time ever.

No, I mean exclusively right now.

No. Well, first time ever that everyone.

Oh, they were all exclusive. I know, you're right.

Very odd.

It is odd. I thought first time for me, I'm like, I've been exclusive, but you never went in the office.

Okay, before we get into some. Well, let me just top this out by saying I'm really excited because we've done these shows before where our team gets on, you know, we talk about toys and products. And I just realized we've been so busy lately bringing you guys a bunch of other types of shows. I was like, I miss review shows. And I've also heard from you guys that it's one of your favorite types of shows because, you know, I love sex toys and products. They enhance your life, your sex life and that. I know when we do these shows, they also kind of help you kind of sort through what you might like, what to buy. I know it's a big. It can be a big investment and it might be your first time. So I'd love to hear from you guys what you think of the show. And if you have any follow up questions, you can let us know. So I am excited and we're gonna learn a lot about each other. I know we haven't talked about it in a while. Okay, so first though, let's. With some sex in the news.

Men think food tastes better when attracted to the waitress. So people like love Hooters or something. Do you think there's a men going, man, they got great burgers or something. You know the Hooters that.

Yeah, I mean, I think it's the wings. And I've. I will tell you, I've been to Hooters, and yes, they are beautiful, lovely ladies there. The wings are, eh. They're okay. I've had way better. Also. It's always really hot in there. Like, do they not know what air conditioning is?

I don't know. I'm just using it. All I can think of which the guaranteed hot waitress is, but I've not spent a lot of time in Hooters, Jamie, you know, way, way more than I do. You're like, no, the wings. And it's hot in there. I'm like, I was making a joke. And Jamie's like, well, on their menu, their fall menu is now having special wings they have because they have persimmons. Okay. So this study shows that men were shown by the study to be more shallow than women. After rating the attractiveness of the wait staff as more important than enjoying the me, a survey of 195 people of both sexes found women were far more interested in the location and noisiness of a restaurant. So what does this say? I just thought this was interesting. An attractive woman raised their expectations of a dining experience even before sitting down to eat. So we're just more focused to. The women are just like, we're more into the food and the person we're dating than the waitress. Are men that easily swayed? I don't know any comments about this. Feelings, emotions?

I mean, I just think it's funny in general that they're like, oh, you're pretty. Yes. This sandwich tastes so much better now and then like this. And for me, too. I'm like, I don't care what you look like. Give me the food, please. I say it nicely. I'm nice to wait staff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. The scientists say it's because physically attractive women can change men's expectations about what they're about to experience. It just feels attractive. Women can change men a lot for a lot of different things, and not necessarily always for the better.

In the study here at the bottom, it says there was two women that approached them with food. The first woman was wearing lipstick and mascara with her hair down. And they rated it more delicious than when they were served to it by a woman who looked like she had acne eye bags and yellow teeth with her hair up.

I wonder if it's all men or just the men in the study. I feel like when I'm hungry and I'm at a restaurant, I'm such a present. Like, I'm paying attention to who I'm with. I'm nice to the wait staff always, but I'm not like, o, yeah, this particular chicken tastes great. So I'm never gonna get restaurant recommendations from a man again. That's my conclusion.

Yeah.

Game over. Moving on. Okay, next sex. The news. 92% of Americans say penny pinching is sexy. The results are in. And frugal is officially the new sexy. Well, at least according to 9 out of 10Americans. This study showed that 92% of Americans consider frugality to be an attractive quality in a partner or potential partner. And that includes former dating faux pas such as using a coupon on a first date. So it says, in fact, if you want to impress your date, don't resort to frivolous overspending. Because it's a total date ruiner for as many as 66% of Americans studied. Which I love this because I feel like there's always that guys think maybe this. Apparently this is kind of old. An old notion that men think, oh, I gotta, like, pull out all the stops and take her to a 10 course meal and do all these things where I think first dates are really about connections and it's not necessarily about what we're doing. It could be a cup of coffee, it could be a walk in the park. But, like, are we connecting? So when guys are like, overly spending, sometimes I can be like, what are you hiding? Why do you think you're gonna impress me with this? I found this to be particularly interesting. Is this cheap or frugal? This is how respondents voted. You guys want to go through some of these?

Yeah.

Not leaving a tip at all. Regardless of the service, 75% people say that's cheap. Like, if you don't leave a tip, like, yeah, I would not date someone who's like.

Yeah, what'd you say? Who?

What? Like, who is you? Because if. If they're not taping the waitress or waiter and then like, that's the person that you. You're gonna be with. Like, they're not gonna treat you right.

Probably.

Or appreciate. It's just like a. You just do it.

My mom always said to me, the way they treat the wait staff is how they're gonna treat you. That was like her one. And the way she. Does he love his mother or not the way he treats his mother and the wait staff. My mom told me that. So let's just. I guess if you didn't leave a chip, I'd Be like, whoa. And I still think if any of my friends don't either, I'll throw down.

I know. I get so.

I get pissed too. Well, I've been a waitress. Have you been?

No.

Okay.

Well, I kind of was. Ish. I worked. I worked at Chuck E. Cheese, and I was a party planner. And a lot of people, you know, I'm like, I'm your host for two hours to a party of, like, anywhere between 10 to, like, 70 people. And I'm, like, the only one. And I'm getting you pictures and all this stuff. And people are like, do you take tips? And I'm like, yes, I take tips.

Right.

Tip me.

I'm waitressing. What's a part of tip that you understand? Okay, we're using it. Tea bag or coffee filters, people. 60% of people say that's cheap.

I think that's just gross.

I think it's gross, too. Throw it out. Calculating your part of a group bill to the. To the scent, cheap. I agree. And only 52% of people find that cheap when that happens at a group dinner. And maybe just because I'm more of an adult now, I just take it. I'm like, I got it. I'll pay for it. Or I'll just especially go on a date with someone like, you owe me $6. 92. Whatever it is now. $22. 62. Oh, no, I didn't have the fries. I'm like, what? It just. You just buzz killed my entire mail.

Seriously.

This is a funny one. Lengthening the longevity of soap by diluting soap bottles with water. Cheap. 49%.

Okay, I'm gonna actually comment on this. I'm gonna comment on this because, you know what? If you're struggling in life or if you're lazy, I think it's fine. Whatever. I'm not even gonna comment. I don't think that's something that I would ever notice about someone unless they were, like, doing it, like, all the time. And I'm like, why the fuck is your soap so just water in my hand. But I don't think that that's cheap. I could call that frugal.

Yeah. Or sometimes you have time to go to the store to get new ones, so you just keep. I don't know I do that. But it's funny because I was at my boyfriend's house last night, and I was in his bathroom, and he had bars of soap that were all, like, little tiny things that were all collected on the. And I was like, oh, my God, is he diluting Chips of soap for something. Is there a reason? I don't think he's cheap, but I wanted to throw them away and just buy him a new bar of soap. I gotta ask him about that. Like, why collect so many bars there, buddy. But he's not cheap. Okay, re gifting cheap 44% thoughts? Not wasteful. It depends.

Like it depends on what it is.

I once had this boyfriend. Oh my God. This was like. Oh my. When I first moved to Sandwich years ago and they invited me over for Christmas. I was like 21 and they buy me to his house for Christmas and they knew I was coming. And the mom wrapped up a bunch of things that she clearly found in the home because she maybe forgot I was coming. And it was like she wrapped up. It was a picture of the family. I'd seen it on the table the last time I was there. Her entire family. I'm like, did you just. I've seen this. And then it was like some Christmas candle thing. It was like stuff that I'd seen in her house before she wrapped up stuff. So that was weird when I knew it was clearly gifted. But I don't know if I got something that I thought you'd like. Okay. Frugal. Buying no name electronics is frugal. How about no name products? 51% that say that's frugal. Yeah, I'd say frugal is positive. Right?

Yeah, frugal is positive. That's like you save and you're like being. And I think it depends on the electronic. I don't. Well, it's actually. I don't think this is cheap or frugal. I think that's like you buy it because you're like, I don't really care. But some people just really care about like quality of electronics. So that I get. But I do agree with no name products. Like at the grocery store. I will buy Ralph's brand. I don't care.

Yeah, depends what you're. I think so too. I think it's pretty much the same. And everyone's got their own brand now. Regularly tracking the home thermostat. Frugal 62%. I guess that's important to do. I never understand those meter things.

Sounds like a dad thing.

Shopping at a secondhand clothing store. Frugal 63%. I don't know. I do it because I think it's fashionable.

Seeking out deals or coupons for all purchases. Frugal 72%. Okay. Yeah, I agree. But why not? I don't.

Yeah, I think so. Like why not get all. Everything is so expensive now too. So.

And you gotta track those bills. They tap stuff on. You're like, that wasn't my water, that was my neighbor. Or whatever they do.

Yeah.

Toilet was running and my bill went up like a million dollars. My water bill. And I didn't know it was running. And I'm glad I looked.

That's good.

Yeah. Okay. Then there's part just randomly, which I love the top 21st date turnoffs.

Oh, good.

Which haven't changed over the years. I've been doing this for 13 years and I've seen these studies and I have to say that people are still turned off now by the same things they were turned off in 2005. So number poor hygiene. 77%. Now my question is, on the first date, does it mean they showed up with a piece of carrot in their tooth, they didn't shower? What is poor hygiene? You think the first date you're gonna kinda do a once over.

Yeah. The first thing I thought about was breath. Dirt underneath the nails and. Yeah.

Breath underneath the nails. Yeah. You guys check your nails. Check your nails. We notice your nails and then we're thinking, that's not going inside me.

Exactly. Also, I don't know why that's not 100% right.

Well, exactly like who.

If you show up, like who's going onto a first date and this person just looks raggedy as hell and you're.

Just like, yes, right. This is how he shows up for the first date to make it work. I love that he didn't shower. It shows that he's super busy. Okay. Bad manner. 73%. I agree. That stuff is just.

Should also be 100%.

Snapping for the waiter or something. Being on their phone. 57% that's consistent. Don't be on the phone.

A lot of people are. It's like if you're on a first date and you're like both on the phone too, though. Like if maybe it's not just one person, you're both on the phone. Like if I were to see someone that I felt like was on a first date, I'd be like, wow, that's not gonna go anywhere.

No, no, you're both. Unless you're both. I usually just go to the bathroom and check it when they're not look or like be like, I gotta go to the bathroom. Like if it's a bad day. But I do. What I love the dates I'm on. I'm actually like, I don't even think about the phone or when I Leave it in the. You know, that's a good moment when you haven't looked at your phone or a good date. Okay, what else here sticks out? Bragging, 49%. It's so fun. It's such a fine line between, like, talking about yourself and bragging. But bragging is like, oh, I did this, I did that. I guess that could be a turn off. Getting drunk. That's not always great. That's 54%.

I get drunk.

Usually the dates that I've gone on. It was a mutual getting drunk, not like wasted, but, you know, So I guess it depends on who you're dating.

Any of these stick out to you guys? Your big turn offs? Have you experienced any of these?

I do think that bragging about money should be way higher than 27%.

Yeah.

And so should being late because, okay, no one's ever on time anymore. And I'm not always on time. But when it comes to, like, dates, like, I'm like, no, because I just feel like that shows that you don't. Unless there was a really good excuse or it was only a few minutes. Right? You know?

Exactly. No, I agree. Being late is not. You're not respecting them. You're not respecting yourself. Bragging about money is bad. I remember going on a date with a guy once, or he was trying to ask me out. We had a bar and he's like, well, yeah, the reason why the first thing he said to me was like, well, the reason why I had to move there so I could have room for my Mercedes and Rolls Royce in my driveway. Like, he literally said that. Like, I was like, do you think, and what planet do I would. I find that that was hot that you had these guys. I guess men still, many a man or woman thinks that that would be attractive. I do not talking too much, 24%. I would just never get a second date. That person was pissed about that.

What about you, Sarah?

Talking poorly about an ex or talking about your ex at all, especially on a first date.

That's a no no. That is a no. No. That is a red flag of my first things. I tell people, like, do not talk about your ex on the first date. Do not. Do not. And I've been with people, they're like, I know I shouldn't do this, but. And then that's kind of okay. If they consciously are like, but it wasn't great, or they'll even say, is it okay if I do this? I know it's not cool. I feel like most people know not to do that. But if they don't know and they're just like, she was crazy or he was, I'm like, nope. Like, that's just not cool. Who else do you hate?

Exactly. Or if you're both, like, mutually talking about your exes, then that's like, a sign that you guys are both probably.

Still obsessed with your ass.

Yeah. Or like, yeah, you're not ready, you know, or whatever that's gonna happen isn't gonna be, like, something serious, most likely.

You're so right. If somebody still hung up. I had this with a guy. He was. Every time he brought up his ex, you'd see his face got red. And this was after we were dating. He got so angry about it. I'm like, clearly, there's some issues that you still need to work on. Let's just deal with that and then call me. All right. Under tipping a server, 13%. Not that.

That should be way higher.

I think so too.

I like, check. Is that weird? I like, look to see what they're tipping them.

No. Yeah, I've done that. I always.

I don't. I don't really say anything, but I take a mental.

Take a mental dip. He's like, I got that. I got you, buddy. You're 15%. Cheap ass. You gotta put more. I do that with my mom sometimes. She just doesn't tip as much. I'm like, mom, I put down, like, another 10. Okay. Lying about their appearance. Oh, I guess if they were. That's 32% if you were lying on, like, an eating app. Okay, so that's a. That's what we got for you for some sex in the news. And just a little reminder of the turnoffs on the first date to bring your best, most honest.

Yeah, maybe you learned something.

Okay, let's move into sex toy review.

Yes.

Oh, my God. Where to start? Where to start? Okay, Jane, producer Jamie, I see you've set this up nicely here. We started with a little bondage.

Yes. Okay, so I was excited about this. One because I had a fun story, and then two, because I know Sarah. Yay.

I, like, make Sarah so lovely. I might take toys home. She wanted them. And I was like, oh, I'm so glad Sarah's here. Thank you. Yes. I'm so glad you're here.

No, seriously.

So take it away, girls.

I finally used a crop.

Good.

During sex.

Explain a crop. Not everyone knows.

So a crop is similar to a paddle. A paddle is like, you know, like, think about it. It's kind of not like a ping pong paddle. It's not as round, but it's like, you know, kind of more narrow. But a crop is kind of like a stick with a little like spatula looking leather thing on the end. So it kind of does a little bit better slap.

Right.

You know, like, think if you've ever seen matilda. I think Ms. Trunchbull.

And this is all gonna be on the site, right? Sex with emily.com toys.

Yes.

Pictures of everything we talked about.

Exactly. So if you're still like Jamie, that was the worst description I've ever heard. You can go there. Sex with emily.com toys and look at it. And I mean, I'm just saying, like, the guy that I'm with right now, he is down to try whatever he. And it's just something. It's like there's certain people that you see and you're like, okay, he's not probably gonna be someone that wants to get rough necessarily, but it's always those people that do.

Oh, that.

I think.

How'd you find out that he did?

Well, because I just, you know, with this job that he knows that I have, I'm just like. So I got some fun stuff at work and I really, really want to try it because it's like, I just always have wanted to. And he like, I definitely like my ass to get slapped very hard. So I was like, thank you. And so I was like, this is definitely gonna help with that. And like, he handcuffed me and it was just like. It wasn't like during the sex. It was like before, and it was just so hot and like, oh, my God, like, I had welts on my ass last day. But it was like, nice.

Was the sports sheets crop?

Yes, it was the sports sheets crop. They have great stuff. And it's so elegant and nice and it's like, not even that expensive.

No, it's really not.

And it was just. I had so much fun and like, I can't wait to use it again.

Wow. And you were handcuffed on your stomach? Obviously.

I was like, kind of in, like, like I was like face down, kind of turned around with my hands behind my back.

Okay. Did he know how to use it and like.

Well, I had to show him a couple things.

Good. Of course it's fine. Show him and then take it away, buddy.

Yeah.

But it was hot. It was foreplay.

It was build up. It was forever. It was hot. The handcuffs really added to it as well. It was more of like, because he could like, hold on to the handcuffs and then use the crop at the Same time. So it was just very dominating and domineering and, like, hot.

I love it. Okay. And he thought it was hot, too.

Yeah. I mean, yeah, he's. I. It's my fault because I keep forgetting to bring it over. Oh, that. We haven't used it again.

Okay, you can leave it there.

I should.

Yeah. Pack up an overnight bag. Okay. Sarah, how about you bondage things?

Let's see. I got to use the flogger. I don't remember who it was by. Maybe it was sports.

Probably the flogger. Should we explain a flogger? People? Crops, paddles, floggers, ticklers. These are all things that you see can spank the butt with. Tickle, tickle the forearms. I mean, a lot of them are just for butts, but they're all kind of a variation of, like, spanking.

Yeah, I feel like floggers you could use on the back, too.

Yeah.

And the balls.

There we go. Step it up. Okay, so tell me.

I'm done talking here. Go ahead, Sarah. Okay, so he used a flogger, you said?

Yeah, so it was on me. It was probably before sex and then a little bit after.

So there was just, like, a lot of spanking that I received. And then flogging on the balls, just lightly, kind of like very gentle, like a tickle, I guess. And that was. He liked that. What else? We did try. We've tried before rope. Just being tied up by rope, and I loved that. That was really fun. And I also tried the handcuffs by Sportsheets, and he put them on. I didn't do anything. He just, like, saw that they're in my bag of goodies, and he was.

Like, yo, were they Velcro or were they.

I think they wear Velcro.

Okay, cool. I love the Velcro handcuffs. Yeah. Okay, so it was hot or was. Had you ever done that before?

I've been. That's a tricky question.

Is he gonna listen? No, you never have before.

You're the first I ever had. Yeah, I've been there. Okay, but this time.

What'D you like about it? Being handcuffed?

I like the. I guess, like the dom, the dominance and like, the submission aspect of it. And I think just being teased like that, especially before sex, and then, you know, it's coming. It's just really fun, you know?

Yeah. Did you use blindfolds as well?

No, we haven't done that yet.

Okay. Just curious, because we talk about this, like, taking restraining or taking a. Putting a blindfold on when you remove one sense, all the other Senses become more heightened. God, you guys are inspiring me. Because I don't think I've done. I mean, I've done this before, but not lately.

Like, recently.

I have my under bed restraints, though, under my bed still. I gotta have. Okay.

Didn't you have a funny story?

When I do a funny. I was moving beds recently. I was, like, redoing my house and redoing my bedroom, and then the guys came in. They didn't speak great English, but they came in and they were building something for us. And they're like. And I wasn't there, but the person working my house says, what do we do about these? What do we do about the ties? And they're like, what do you mean? Like, what do we do about these ties? And they pulled out the underbed restraints. And she's like, you can just leave them over there. Yeah, so that's what happened. But they're really cool because you can leave them under your bed at all times if you ever just want to be tied up. But, yeah, I love a good spanking. What else have I done lately? Oh, the. Oh, role play. Bondage. I just think the thing about bondage and just playing with these things, I think people are like, oh, bdsm. It's so painful. We're just talking about me. It could be. But if you're just playing with some light crops or paddles or your hand, even handcuffs, it's just a little something different that could just spice it up. Delaying sex. It's not like we're having sex the same way every single time. And I just think it's fun to kind of bring a different Persona. I was at Bloomingdale's the other night before I left for Wanderlust. I was running, and I was super late. They were closing. I had to get something real quick. The woman there, Lydia, at the makeup counter, she was like, what are you doing? I'm like, oh, I'm gonna go speak at Vermont, this festival. She's like, oh. I'm like, what do you do? I'm like a sex doctor. And she's like, role play. She's like, I've been doing that for years. Just tell every woman to get a wig. I'm like, what do you mean? She's like, well, I just put my wig on, and my husband, we've been together 20 years. I throw it on, and he knows I could just become a different person. He knows what that means. Like, I'm. My alt. Her ego. And I just think there is something about throwing out a Wig or, like, using paddles or just using one thing a little bit differently. And, like, you can kind of be someone else and she's like. Or have someone wear a mask. And, you know, I've talked about these things too, but there's something about wearing a mask or changing your appearance slightly. Maybe you're talking in an accent, but the second you can adopt a different Persona, it might give you permission to kind of let loose in other areas. Your partner sees you as someone else. You see yourself as someone else.

Yeah, and it's. It's just like. It's like letting yourself go and really just like, if you ever. One of those people that's not, like, can't really always get in the moment during sex. Like, these things bring you to the moment. It's, like, really hard not to, like, be focusing on what's happening when you're getting smacked in the ass with a paddle and then getting a nice little feather tickler for the aftercare.

Yeah, exactly.

That sensation play is important. Just spice it up. So switch it up.

True level sensation play. Okay, you guys, we'll be right back. Thank you to our sponsors. We love you. Thank you for supporting them. It helps keep the show free. Allows two shows a week. We love you.

Should we get into some vibrators? Do you want to?

Yes. My favorite.

I love vibrators. Okay, so where do you guys want to start?

Well, from our good friend Dr. Sadie Allison. She had sent us this finger vibe from Aria, and it's a little bullet that you put into this little, like, purple type sleeve that has kind of like a little handle so you can kind of, like, wear it on your hand in a sense. And I unfortunately, was not able to use it during sex. But it was just interesting because I had actually never used a bullet vibe. Like a little tiny bullet vibe. I'm a starter, and I'm fortunate because with Emily, I've just been able to just, like, go from 0 to 100 as far as sexual toys go. But it was like, I was actually surprised about how powerful that little thing was. It, like, really, like, it got, like, the highest setting. I'm like, oh, damn.

You could wear it on your hand. Your partner can wear. I haven't tried mine yet, but yeah.

So it's a little heart thing, right? And then you like it. So it, like, kind of, like, fits as, like, you know, like those. Those pop things on phones now, like, you can hold your phone. It's like, kind of like that. But for you, you know, for the vibrator, I Love it.

Your finger turns into a vibrator, which.

Makes it like also, if you're ever trying to like, oh, should I use a vibrator during sex? Like, it's so small and it fits on your hand. It's like the easiest way to get clitoral stimulation or whatever kind of stimulation you're looking for.

That's true. You know, there. And it's not intrusive.

Exactly.

Yeah. And you use it during.

I used it during masturbation for me. But it's like a nice break because I always use my womanizer. So it's like, ah, I gotta try.

You're still in the womanizer train.

I just love it.

You've been doing that forever. It's under your pillow.

It is still. I wash it and then put it.

On the pillow or the womanizer.

Both.

Okay, good. But I don't recommend both.

Yeah, recommend both. But, you know, so it was actually fun to like break away from my routine and like try something else. And I definitely. Because then I'll know. I'm like, this is gonna stay in my bag. So the next time I see my guy, which is gonna be soon.

You always have it with you. It's not obtrusive. And I love the idea of like. Yeah, the hand. The hand. It just becomes a vibrant. Did you use it as well?

Yeah.

Tell me, Sarah.

I used it during masturbation with the forea massage oil. And I think it was really relaxing. I was really surprised by how strong that thing is. And I think it has like 10 plus settings.

And the little thing.

Yeah, it's. And it's ergonomically. Right, that's the word. Designed in the palm of your hand. Yeah.

Nice. Okay.

Very cute. It can fit in your purse if you want to. If you're out on the town and want like spontaneous orgasm sex with your person.

Yeah. You just have it with you.

I like where your head's at.

No, but like, it's important.

It's true.

Sometimes you just want to some stimulation.

And it's strong, it's small and strong. So yeah, you can insert it a little bit. Like it comes with like a piece attachment.

Okay.

And I don't know if that can reach to your G spot, but.

Right. But it's secure on your finger so you don't have to worry about like falling off. I love, I love hand vibe. Jimmy Jane makes one. The touch. Not the touch. It's called the hello. Maybe it's called the hello touch.

Oh, hold on.

The Jimmy Jane one. And that one's a little more expensive than, like, this little bullet one we're talking about by Aria. A R, A. But I love the idea of it. And people even said to me, they should have a hand vibrator. I'm like, they do. So that's a cool one. I'm glad you liked it. Now, what about the forea? Let's explain what that is.

It's the first ever massage oil designed for a woman that has CBD as one of the main ingredients in this coconut oil and a whole bunch of nice, natural, organic ingredients.

What do you think about it?

I really liked it. I used it while masturbating right before going to sleep. And I don't know if other people sometimes get like this, but, like, sometimes you're so stressed in the day or you kind of feel, like, detached from your parts down there.

Yeah.

And like, I don't know, it just helps you just relax and connect. Yeah. Connect to it and just, you know, do your thing.

Did it feel tingly when you use it? Because it's like a little bit.

Yeah.

Yeah. Okay, good. I used it a while ago, but they just gave us some. So we're going to be reporting more on cbd, Using CBD as a. As a. Yeah. And I'm stimulation.

I'm all for cbd, thc, all that stuff. And yeah, I used it for masturbation, too. Not with the finger vibe. The aria. I actually went old school and used my hands. Yeah.

Oh, my God, girl.

And, you know, it takes a little bit longer, but it is good to, you know, get back into knowing your body. And, like, I mean, as someone that, like, experiments with smoking marijuana and all that stuff, I couldn't tell if my vagina was high, but I wanted to say that it was okay.

Did they have the munchies or something?

I mean, if it's. If the munchies is fuel for orgasm.

Right. Oh, good. So you felt a little more turned. I think that it could help. Just relax. Like Sarah's saying, we just hold so much tension. I think anything we could do to get people into their bodies and connected. And I think that the forearm can do that.

Definitely.

I'm gonna try mine. I've got a lot to do tonight. You guys are inspiring me. I didn't travel with it, so I know we were gonna try it. And so. And I just want to say one thing. If you're new to the show or you just. This is your first sex toy review show. I've just been having a lot of them.

I've Been feeling sort of lately about having to defend the vibrators. I know I've been talking about this internally on this, you know, in the office. But, like, seriously, if you're this person going, oh, we don't need those or vibrators. Why would we use it? We've got our hands, like Jamie here, it's great to use your hands. It's great to just have to have intercourse. But this whole, like, we don't need that. Like, the only way you should have pleasure is just skin on skin and nothing else is like saying, when you get a car, you should never get your windows tinted. You should never get nicer, you know, wheels. You should never, like, get that extra sauce on your dessert. Like, I just feel like we're always trying to go with analogies here for vibrators. And not because I'm a pusher. It's just because I feel like this notion that the only right kind of orgasm, the right kind of sex is just between this natural, God given, like, we're all gonna have these orgasms when we touch is just not realistic. And I think you're missing out because it could just. For a lot of people, it's orgasm. For a lot of people, it's connecting to themselves. For a lot of people, just fun. It's a great way to spice up your masturbation routine, your solo routine, sex with your partner. We know the vibrations feel great for men and for women. So I'm still on that whole, like, fu. For, like, I didn't need it until Try it out.

This, like, reminds me of this. This porn I was watching actually. And Erica left porn. So if you have never heard of her, she's great. We did an episode with her and it was about these ladies at brunch. So I actually. Okay, so we watched this one.

Not together.

Yeah, not together. Probably would have, though. I know, but so we. I had to skip through to the first 15 minutes because I didn't really care about all the women talking. I was just like, I just want to see some good old fashioned, nice lady sex. But that's the thing that I like nice ladies. Yeah. Well, no, but I just like. It's because they just. It was basically like these two women and they were just like, beautiful and on a bed and just like experimenting with all these different toys. And I just was like, that is so amazing and great. And I wish that all people could, like, just be open to that because, I mean, like, obviously, like, with two women, unless you're using a strap on, there's not really penetration, so. But they could have the most fun. I think out of any combination of couple, I think two women could have the most, most fun because you could. You're multi orgasmic. You could just go. You could try out all the different toys. Oh, my God.

I had like 13 orgasms the other day. It was. I can have a lot.

Yes, Emily, Yes.

I gotta remember. No, I was. Where was I? I was. How do I remember this? Oh, no, I do remember. I do remember. I wasn't. I was.

It was a Tuesday. Come on.

So I did. I knew we were doing the show, so I went to Wanderlust in Vermont to speak, and I was with Ben, my boyfriend, and he came to see me and see each other in like two weeks and. And I packed up my sex toy thing and I was. And I had my period, so. God, that's a lot of information. But I was like, I wasn't into. At that moment into having sex, and I was into intercourse. So I don't think he'd ever see me on my roll. That I do. Like, when I can just. I could literally could still be there now, but I had to come back to California and it was just. I think I was using the. What did I pack with me? I packed the Pivot, which is two for like a cock ring by WE Vibe. And I used that. And then I was using. Oh, the Touch, which I also love by WE Vibe. But what else did I pack with mouse? Oh, and I tried the jive. So I tried the Jive too by WE Vibe. So I like, I was trying them all, but I had the Jive inside me. Should we get into that?

Yeah, I love that one.

The Jive is a brand new toy. New. Ish. Now right. By WE Vibe the last few months. Mm. And it's like a. An egg is what they call them.

Yeah, it's like a. Where it's called. It's called a wearable vibe. I mean, it's. It's called an egg, but it is a wearable vibe. So what it means is it's like it just. You put it on inside you and then you can use. There's like a little. It looks like it kind of looks like a blue sperm.

Yeah, that's like a blue sperm because.

There'S like a little tail and that's how you control it.

I love it. I love the nuanced little controller. Right. So I put it. Well, first I just knocked out a few with the Touch and then some other things and then I put that inside Me, because it's so you can, like, clench it like you're doing your Kegels. And it kind of can have an internal and an external, like, blended orgasm. And then we were supposed to go out that night because it has the remote control. It has. You can use it with the app. And we didn't do that because.

I had 13 orgasms. I was like, we don't need to continue this on the road. But we were going to. And I was speaking. But I want to do that, to me, is the most fun thing because I've always been so been into, like, panty vibes and, like, how you can, like, wear them in your underwear and your partner controls them. But this is like that next level where you're actually can go out at night and you can wear it inside of you, and then your partner can kind of control it, and it's really powerful and cool. And I love all the different vibrations. Did you guys try that as well?

Yeah, I actually used mine with my womanizer, because you put it inside and, like, I'm one of those. People are like, I think the patterns are fun and they're cool.

Yeah.

I don't need them. I just want that straight, constant vibration. So I use that with my womanizer. So it was like two stimulations in one. And I just like, this is gonna be graphic. But I orgasm so hard, the jive's shot right after me.

That happened to me too. Everything shoots out of me. Like, even his penis when I'm orgasming, sometimes shoots across the room. Yeah.

So that was fun. And it was like one of those moments where I'm like, damn, I wish I could tell someone right now. But it's like, also be like, what?

I don't think I should tell someone. Wait, did you know what happened to me?

We were at this yoga festival. I just remember this. And I didn't know the window was open. And there was, like, 80 people taking some kind of aerial yog beneath our window. And I was so loud, and it was like, oh. And he's like, people just doing aerial yoga, and I don't know if they hear it or not, but he just, like, slams the window. He's like. I'm like, I didn't see the windows open. That sucks. Like a yoga festival. I was chilling. It was funny. So you liked or did you use the use it on your own?

Yeah, I mean, and I want, like, again, it's like, I want to use it out.

To dinner or something like that, but it's like, it's Kind of like one of those things that it's like, it's. It totally fits in your purse, but it's, like, not one of those things that I'm conscious of. Like, I'm gonna bring this to dinner, or I'm gonna put it in there and wear it.

I just like, yeah.

Because then it's like, what if you have to go to the bathroom while you're on the date? You gotta pull it out and then you put it back in.

What do you do? You wash it and sink. And someone's like, what is that blue sperm in your hand? Like the sign, please wash your hands before you go back to the meals for you that day. Like, we don't care who works there. Like, wash your hands. Did you try the Giant?

I did.

I did. During sex? Yes. I used it mainly as an external vibrator, and I just put it on my mons pubis. And then also just on the exterior part. Oh, majora.

Okay.

So when his. He was inside of you for part of the time.

Yeah. And then you had.

And you had it on top of you. Okay, good.

Yeah, it's really strong. So those vibrations feel really good. Even I haven't. I'm trying to be more mindful when I masturbate or when I'm having sex, and with sensations in the different parts of that.

I love it. He's like, she's calling because the labia. I learned that and read like, the labia is so sensitive. I was thinking that actually with a lot of these toys that just because it says, wear it internally, a lot of them feel great. Like, to pivot. They feel great externally, too. You can just put the vibrations. You can play with them. Let us know.

Yeah, No, I love that. You're like, one of your favorite vibrators is the pivot, because it is a cock ring that, you know, goes on penises. But you're like, no, I'm gonna use it for me. I'm like, on my fingers.

Yeah. Equal opportunity vibe. Speaking of, was there anything else with the jive or any of those? Did you like the jive? You used the.

I used the G Pop. Human with the phoria. Because he was very jealous. He was like. I was like, no, this is for women. And he's like, no, I can use it.

The phoria? Yeah. I think anyone can use it. Okay, so you use the.

The G Pop. It's by FT London. The cool thing about this that I think is that you can use it for a G spot, but you can also use it for a P spot.

So, I mean, prostate.

Yeah.

So just wash it in between.

Yeah, exactly. Don't. Do not transfer. Do not do it.

Wow.

So what'd you think?

I like. Well, I think he liked it.

Oh, he liked it, too.

But I also used it. Washed it in a different time. Not the same.

So he had. He ever had anything in his prostate?

He had. Yeah. He's done that stuff before, and he didn't know I had this with me, but he brought it up earlier in the day. He's like, I think I'm willing to try something like that. And I was like, okay.

Just you wait.

And so that was the first for me. I'd never stuck my finger in that area before, so I don't. I feel like I get a gold star or something.

How did you know what to do? Did you. Because you listen to the show.

You work in here.

But, like, did you use lube? And then you gently put it inside.

Wow.

Was he sitting? How was he? What was his position?

He was on his back.

Okay. And he liked it.

Yeah.

The G Pop. It's cool. It's a good one. It's like, two for. Again. It's like G spot. It's like. Yeah.

Five different settings, too.

Yeah.

Cool.

I love it. G Pop. And so these are all gonna be at sex with emily.com toys, right? Okay. The other thing, speaking of, you reminded me, which I love. Sarah's, like, breaking down to the mons pubis and the labia that I've only realized in recent years, paying attention to it are that it's not just about the clitoris at the. It feels so great. There's all these nerve endings up and down the labia. It's not just the tip. It's everything. Did we all try the Mimic?

I did, yes.

Okay. I'm glad you brought that up, because they sent it to us to try. And it's called the Mimic. And I love that it was all external nerve endings of the vulva.

No, seriously. And it's like. Cause it does. It's ergonomic, so it's easy to lay in the palm of your hand. There's no handle thing, but it lays in the palm of your hand.

It looks like a butterfly kind of.

It does. Or like a stick.

Stingray. Yeah, Stingray. Sorry.

Yeah.

No, but it's true.

Because it, like, nestled into my little.

Yeah, you just kind of like. Because normally I masturbate on my back, but with. When I use that, I was like. And so I laid on my stomach and I put it underneath me and, like, I mean, I don't know. It's just like, it's good to experiment. And I thought it was cool. And it is true. Like you said, there's so many different nerve endings down there. And also, like, what I didn't know before working here is that your clitoris actually extends within your pubic mound. So, you know, if you ever feel like, oh, like, that feels good. It's like, well, it's because you're indirectly stimulating it. And so, like, I use that for there. And I think that's.

Yeah, I like that too. It's true. That's why I used to. When I didn't understand this, when I was sex, I was pushing down on my pubic mound. I was like, pushing to, like, have orgasm. It's because, yeah, through there, you're. You're accessing your G spot or the internal clitoris or whatever it is. So the whole thing. I know what it is.

Terminology doesn't matter.

Pleasure doesn't matter, but pleasure does. And that it all makes sense. So that's why we do talk about mindful masturbation. That was one of my talks. I gave it at wanderlust was about how do we become more mindful when we masturbate, which will help us to, you know, kind of get out of our heads during sex and also discover all these new erogenous zones. So I love that we also had this little, like, I'm like, I gotta bring all these toys because we're doing a sex toy review show. And even me, it's my job. It got me to be like, huh. Like, I like. Because I wanted to be able to tell you guys, you know, the most. With the most detail and information I could about what I learned. So I really was, like, paying attention. So, like, I liked that the mimic in the Sting was reaching these other areas that I usually just, like, got used to. Just sometimes just touching my clitoris. But I like that this gave it a whole. Like, it spread all part my vulva. Yeah, spread everywhere.

Like, the way that it kind of like, the grooves are. It really does kind of just like Nestle.

Nestles. And then I would flip it and it nestled on both sides. Did you flip it around both sides, even think about. Oh, yeah, I flipped it. I. I did a little. I twisted around. Like, I did. I was like, I did it fit each way you upside down and. Yeah, we'll get you a mimic, Sarah.

And then. I don't know. I mean, not that. Okay. Like, none of. No one in this room besides Michael who's not talking has a penis. But just if guys are feeling, like, left out or anything, there's stuff there for you, like the prostate, like Sarah said with the G pop. And then Emily was talking about the pivot for the ring, you know, so you can use it as a cock ring. But there's, like, stuff besides, like. I mean, Fleshlight is great, but there's also stuff like, you know, like, Hot Octopus has this thing called the Pulse duo.

Yes. I've been wanting. They're gonna get. They're gonna get us one. I've seen that at the sex toy trade shows, and people apparently.

I love it. I'm so interested.

It's like a male. It massages your penis. It's a vibrator. It's like the. One of the first penis vibrators for penis.

Yeah.

Yeah. Like, not like it nestles your penis in there and just kind of has these. I don't know. I have a penis. I think I'd be super psyched about it.

I would. And then they also. They do have one for, like, if you are using it with a partner. There's, like, one called, like, the Pulse Duo.

Yeah, the Pulse Duo. That's been all the way so that.

It can be, like, two vibe. Two people can benefit from it. So I think that's great. But I just wanted to make that note.

Yeah. What's the other one? I'm looking for the new. It's not the pivot, but it's the.

Oh, the verge.

I love the verge because that's also Penis ring. But it also can be worked so that it's powerful. It's a really good powerful. All these toys can be used as a clitoral vibe, But I like it because that's the balls. Also. It's a perineum and also the ball.

So that's like indirect prostate simulation.

Indirect prostate stimulation. It's a good way to start if you're like, I'm not sure if it feels good. Men can put it on their penis. You can wear it during sex. You could just use it when you're masturbating on your own. But it was pretty. I didn't use it with anyone else. I was just playing with it and. And I really like it. Like, I can't. It's just really. I don't know. I was just kind of laying it over my vulva. But I actually have it in my go kit to use during sex. No one else has used it here? No, I think we only got one of them. That's right. We need more.

Yeah.

Damn it. We Vibe. No, we love you. No, we love you. We get so many fun toys from them. I'm so proud about the cool companies we work with. The Womanizer, Kate, Jamie. I love the Womanizer. That's always like, one of my go tos. Do you have a Womanizer yet? Did we give you?

Yeah, I have the Womanizer.

What'd you say?

I like it a lot. And that's a really cool combination that you with the dive. Yeah, I want to try that.

Yeah. That is kind of the perfect combo. The jives inside of you, which is like the. And I called it an egg because that's sort of one of the classic vibrators, like a clitoral vibe, a G spot vibe, and egg vibe. It's called an egg vibe. They used to have them with strings and a remote control, like, years ago. So that's a great one, though, because the. The we vibe. I mean, the we vibe. The Womanizer is a very different kind of clitoral stimulation. It's like nothing else, but it's the sure thing, and it just. It's intense. I could have, like, 86 if I start on the Womanizer. Like, I'll be, like, not coming into work for a day because you can get so many orgasms from it. What'd you think about when you first tried it, Sarah?

I was kind of blown away by the fact just like that. Air Pleasure patent technology.

Yeah.

And I was like, whoa, what is this? Like, even if you were to be in the store and play with it with your hands and do. It's foreplay right there. Cause you just imagine it in that area. I liked it a lot.

Yeah. They make a bunch of them now. The latest one is the starlet.

Yeah. Which is the little one, which is a little cute. You know what it reminds me of? Now that I think about it, for those of you who are into Mario games and stuff like that, it's not Yoshi, but I always forget the name, but it's the purple one with the nose thing. It's just what it reminds me.

I know you said this, but I don't know.

You guys are never going to look at Mario Kart the same way again.

Thanks, Jane. Thanks for doing that.

You're welcome.

So that's the Womanizer, which we haven't talked about in a while. I'm so. I want to give a shout out to UV Clean. Because now that I've finally spent time organizing my house and my life and my. My sex toys, I The UV is amazing. It is. It cleans stores and sanitizes all your sex toys. But not only that, it plugs into the wall, it kills 99.9% of all harmful bacteria. And it's a cool looking box that locks so your parents, your kids, your roommates can't get into it. And I use it now every time I take a toy out instead of like putting it under the pill like, Jamie, why don't you. Do you have a UV in your house? You must plug it in. But I mean, you can still. I'm not judging you. No, no, no.

The thing is, I put it in the. I put my other toys in the uv, but I put it in the uv, but I just like to have it under.

I know. Who wants to get out of bed and walk to the uv? I have my next time bed. But what I'm saying. What I love about the UV is that. But it always is. They're always charged. But plus I clean my phone at night and clean your makeup brushes. It's got all these uses now that I'm just like kind of obsessed with it being near me at all times. So everything can be clean.

Yeah. Cause everything is like crawling with bacteria.

Everything is okay. And there's also some great toy cleaners too. Joe makes a great toy cleaner I'm really into. Like when I want a quick thing, I just use a spritz.

It's cool. Cause you can hear it cleaning. It's like this foam and it starts to like, like make the sound like. And I was like, yes, get rid of that.

Clean that.

Right.

Okay. So what else, you guys? Anything else exciting here?

The vesper necklace.

Ooh, yeah. Talk about the Vesper by Crave.

That was my first vibrator and it was because of this show when you talked about it. Yeah, I love that thing.

It's amazing. You always have it with you.

Yeah, you can.

Yeah, I actually do.

And I love that you can pair it with so many different things. Like, and we didn't talk about it yet, I don't think, but the unbound jewelry.

Oh, let's talk about that.

Yeah, like the cuffs. And then they have like, what are they? The choker necklaces that are also floggers and like nipple clamps and click clamps and all these different things on their site.

Those are great gifts too. Yeah.

And some of those you can wear in public. And that's foreplay right there, at least for me, when you're wearing that. And like, if your partner doesn't know what it Is. But like, you're inside on the joke and it's exciting for you. Or if they are inside on the joke and like, somebody points out your jewelry and they're like, oh, that's really cute. He knows what it's for, so it's.

Like a joke for him. That's such a good way to put it. Sarah. It's a really cute little. If you guys could check the Crave Vesper. I mean, God, it probably came out six years ago now. And I used to wear it all the time.

Still pretty.

It's so pretty. No, I want to, like, I want to start wearing again. It's true. And you always have it on you and feel like, what is that? And then you're right. And unbound jewelry, too. It's just kind of. It's seductive because it's beautiful jewelry. And I think it's. And also, yeah, it can be like they. The loose vial and they have a little flogger.

Oh, yeah. Seriously, like, it's, it's. It's just like, you feel elegant and so sexy because it's dual purpose.

Dual. You got your accessories and then if.

Yeah, you wear around your partner and.

They'Re like, it's going down, it's going down, it's happening. And I want to say also, I think this is the season that people are like, getting like, bridals. I feel like there's bridal season or graduation season. And I think that great gift for someone or bachelorette party or something is to give away, like, get some unbound jewelry. It's not that it's not super expensive, but it's super fun. And the necklace for your friends, I think you get engraved on them. Yeah, I think it's a gift.

They have like, tickler rings too. So it's like this cute little, like, fuzzy ring thing, but it's like, you know, supposed to be a tickler. And then they also. I love. And Emily wears it, like in the office sometimes. It's like their massage ring. It kind of goes around like two fingers and it has like these like little like, like, you know, like gold balls on it or whatever. But it feels really good.

Like, it does feel good. And like, I think it'd be nice nicely paired with some massage oil. Yeah, you could kind of massage your partner down because the oil and that.

Ring, Sarah's like, I know what I'm doing. I know.

Dude, we gotta give you some more jewelry.

I got to use the Donna kissable massage oil. Oh. Tell us each of the scents. Flavors smell amazing. Don't eat them. Or like, don't.

Like, don't. Because they smell good. It's chocolate, but don't eat it. Okay, Good to know.

And it's really comfortable on the skin, and it's not sticky or anything like that. And you forget that you ever put it on because it just absorbs nicely into the skin and no cleanup needed.

Good. Okay. I love massage, you guys. A little massage oil, a little bondage stuff. We're just giving you some little tips here. Sensory play, little things to add accoutrements to add to your already exciting sex life or do spice it up. Okay. Jamie's been hankering for a glass stone or steel dildo.

I want one.

We're getting sent to us. We are just like. We have a dearth of dildos here. I don't know what happened to them.

Yeah. And I mean, because that's the thing. I've never really experimented with that. And I really like cold stuff. So I really want to get like a glass one or stone and put it in the freezer.

That's a great thing. And it's great for G spot stimulation. Great for prostate play. If you've never. Basically, a dildo is a non. Does it doesn't vibrate. Everything else people kind of say, is that your dildo? Like, they'll say to a vibrator. I'm like, actually, a vibrator vibrates a dildo, but they're cool. Like I told you, the enjoy one's really cool. I think it's in my garage, not used. I have to give you one of those. It's a different kind of pressure. It's a different way to find your G spot or just to kind of open everything up inside of you without the vibration. But just applying the pressure inside can feel amazing. So we're gonna experiment. Fun with dildos. 2018, summer 2018. It's the dildo tour. Dun, dun, dun. Okay, what else? We got the clit stimulation. We got the massage oil from Forea.

I think we can move on.

Let's move on.

Let's do some.

Let's move on, you guys. So there's some sex toys. Let us know if you have any questions. You can all find@sexfelmily.com toys and we love you all. Let us know what you think of the show. I'd love to hear your suggestions if there's anything you try that you like or other ways you'd like to hear about the things that we love here. Okay. We're on to emails. If you have A question you want us to answer on the show. You can text Ask Emily all one word to 797-979 and then you fill out the short form. Go to sexwithelmily.com, click the Ask Emily tab and always include your age, your name, where you live and how you listen to the show. And you can always change the cities you live in. You can always change your name. We're cool with that too. We just want to help you. First email. This is from Josh, 36, Denver. Jamie, you want to read it?

Sure. Okay. So Josh says, my wife and I love silicone lubes, but we also love our silicone toys. I know that silicone lubes generally don't play well with silicone toys. And the last thing I want to worry about when things are getting hot and heavy is what lube to use. Are you aware of any toys or toy brands that work with silicone lubes or silicone lubes or silicone hybrid lubes that are silicone toy safe? Thanks Emily. We love the podcast and you. Aww.

Love you too Josh. This is a great question. So I think that is true that you're really not supposed to use silicone lubes with silicone toys, which is kind of a bummer because if you like silicone lubes which are more that slippery, they last longer, they're great for anal sex, they're great for foreplay, but with your toys they're not supposed to work as well. They could break it down. So I recommend Joe Silicone hybrid lube. We've all used that and it's a hybrid so it still has that slipperiness but it's water based and it's not going to do as much of it. Probably won't do any damage.

Yeah, I think if you.

As long as you wipe off your toy after.

Yeah, just wipe the toy off after, it's fine.

Yeah.

You know, don't let it sit there for and like ruminate.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wipe it off. And then Joe Jelly's water based, they'll last longer. For your silicone toys, it's a jelly water based lube which has a really fun texture that lasts longer. That would be amazing. It's thick. And then there's also glass and stone toys. Cock rings. Dildos that you can use your silicone lube with if you'd like. Since it's the summer of dildos, you can jump on our dildo tour.

Yes. Check it out. Jump on the dildo tour. I love that.

2018.

Thank you.

They took a dildo on the road. Okay, so thank you, Josh for that. And next email.

John 45 Australia. How to get men to approach you. Hi Emily. I'm a heterosexual appearing man who wants to explore his bi side. I have almost never been hit on by a guy. How can I change this? How can I let gay or bi men know I'd like to be approached? Thanks.

Okay, thanks, Sarah. Well, I think that it makes sense if you're, if you're heterosexual appearing and you haven't been kind of curious before, it makes sense. They probably haven't approached you. So it's not like a weird thing. I thought maybe he was saying like, why hasn't it happened? But you can approach men as well, not wait for them to come to you. And I think that would just be a matter of going to places where more bi or gay men hang out. If you have gay bars near you, if you have gay friends, bisexual friends, I'd say that would be a great place to start. Ask them for advice too. And I think it's the kind of thing, if you asked your friends like, hey, I was thinking they'll be like on board, they'll be taking you out. You can ask them these questions because I'm not sure exactly where you are in Australia, but I feel like there's probably gay bars. I don't know about the apps there, but we do have some apps here that are more open to people exploring.

Yeah.

So you can check that out. And I think just like when you're trying to attract anybody, you just want to use eye contact, you want to be sincere, you want to smile and put out a vibe that you're ready to talk. Just be confident. Just be confident and be yourself. I know it's kind of nerve wracking probably if you've never had to, you know, never approached a man. But I think it goes just when you want to approach, you want to get the job or you want to, you know, make new friends, you just kind of be open, be yourself and kind of just. Yeah.

And I mean, I'm feeling like because he's never, he's wants to experiment, he's just nervous is really what it is. Because he's just like, oh my God, like, what if I get rejected or they think I'm weird or whatever and it's like, no, I think you can just like, you know, like I feel like I randomly strike up conversations with people when I'm out. Like you can kind of just gauge, kind of give them that like signal or whatever. If you're just like, doing that maybe. I don't know.

And I think you're right, Jane. That's a really good point. If you're nervous about it because you haven't approached anyone in a while and anybody listening to this, if you're like, yeah, I'm nervous to talk to this woman or this guy I find attractive, I'm gonna remind you guys of this, that dating is a muscle. Approaching people is a muscle. And if you don't use it, you lose it. Or if you've never used it, let's build it. Because we all get insecure. We all have times where we're more social than others. But the more you just practice when you're out, like, you could be at the coffee shop, you could be in the elevator, or practice smiling and talking to people. Just, hey, how's your day going? It could be, obviously someone you're not attracted to, just anybody. You just want to say hi. And practicing just being that person that's smiling and you're paying attention, you're asking questions, then it'll just become part of what you do every day. Holding the door open for somebody, you know, washing your car, talking your friend and talking to strangers. And I think it's a great way to meet people. And you never know who you're going to meet. Maybe a new friend, maybe your next job. You'll meet your boss somewhere like you, we don't know. But I just think that we are so isolated. We're on our phones. And since we're on our phones all the time in public, I've noticed this, that it used to be when you're waiting in line for something, you didn't have anywhere to go and you'd have to talk to people. You'd talk to the person at the cash register. You'd talk to the people behind you in line. But now we're all staring down and we have less and less opportunity to talk. We actually think, oh, well, this person might be offended if I talk to them because they're on their phone. No, they're probably just fucking scrolling through Instagram. Say hello. Nothing wrong with going to add sex with Emily and liking my photo, but.

That'S the only exception. Practice talking.

That's the only time. Practice talking. Practice. Okay. Is that all we got time for?

I think that's.

This was a fun, packed show. Thank you for making our summer tour sex Show A Reality 2018. Thank you, everyone, for listening to the show. Thank you, Jamie, thank you, Sarah. Thank you for helping people here and trying out the toys. I know it's kind of a grind here. Gotta masturbate a lot but Emily, how.

Could you make us do such a thing?

You guys are awesome. I'm so glad you guys are on the team. Really. This was a blast and thanks to everyone for listening. I love you all. Please keep sending your emails and being in touch and if you want to be included in a call show, you can just check that box too in your emails when you send them in. So thank you all, hope you're having a great summer and thanks to Ken, volunteer, Sarah, producer, Jamie and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me feedbackexwithemily.com.

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