6 Months to Top 1% Relationships and Results

Embracing change and unlocking your potential. This is what we're here to do. This is what Leading Dental Woman is all about— you getting you to change parts of your life, your habits, whatever it is that is just not serving you right now in your life, so that you can enhance every part of your future. So here we go. Today we're going to talk about the Kubler-Ross— I should say the Kubler-Ross Change Curve. I don't know if you've heard of it. If you haven't heard of it, uh, then here we go. You're in for a little journey, um, and it's not going to be a long presentation today. It's just, uh, going to expand your view on a few things. So let's, um, share my screen with you. So you can see it. Embracing Change, Unlocking Potential. So you can see it up there. Go to the next one. So here's the curve. For those who haven't seen it before, it's an im— important curve actually. It is also known as the 5 stages of grief. And it helps you understand your emotional journey when you're faced with significant changes or loss. So it could be making a certain decision or moving on from something or indeed loss. So in this instance, we're going to talk about it as women in dentistry with regards to change because we know that change is where the magic happens. So these 5 stages you can see on the chart, there's denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Okay, we all want to get to acceptance. We want to get to that part where we actually move forward with making that change happen. So these stages can be applied to various changes in your personal life and in your professional life. So let's have a little look at it. So you can see here with denial, that's where we could have disbelief, where we're looking for evidence that might not be true. So we're finding excuses, we haven't really accepted that we need to change something. So we're not in that moving stage, but there's a little upward journey from there, which then leads us to experimenting, where we initially engage with the new situation. So you're a little bit unsure, fear comes in, and then frustration comes in. And with frustration, sometimes we want to give up, don't we? But no, we're not giver-uppers, are we? Good word, giver-uppers. Uh, so frustration's about recognizing that things are different, um, and you might have anger come in here as well. So yeah, you just might go, that's it, I've had, I've had it. So you're gonna keep going down a little bit till you hit a point where you go, you know what, it's time to change, I'm making that decision. And from there you learn new things. That is a huge learning phase, and a lot of you are in that here in Leading Dental Woman. And I think most of you, actually all of you. And then we get to the integration phase where changes are integrated into your life and it is a new, new you, a renewed you. So let's go to the next one. All right, so that's another little summary of those. So we're going to go through these in a bit more detail. So we know that here in Leading Dental Woman you are undergoing big transformations, big changes are happening because you are addressing things you may have never addressed before. You are learning things you may never have even known existed, and you are also ignoring the avoidance— so sorry, not ignoring— you are also— I'm going to get this right in my head— you're also stopping avoidance and actually getting something done. That's what I'm trying to say. And in there we know, so we've gone through the chart in a little summary now, and you can see it up on the screen as well, um, that everyone goes through the chart at a different pace. And you can see there's lots of ups, lots of downs. So this journey you're having with me and my team in Leading Dead to a Woman and with the other women here has a lot of ups and downs. You're going to cry, You're gonna have breakthroughs. You're gonna think, oh, do I really have to face this now? Do I have to do this exercise? Well, you don't have to do anything, but if you want to progress and want to power through your blocks and things that are keeping you from achieving, then you're gonna hit frustration. You're gonna hit all these areas in the chart in order to get your breakthrough. So let's go back to the first stage, denial. So you may struggle to accept the reality of change, okay? The fact you are here, you've accepted that change needs to happen in some or many areas of your life, and I congratulate you for that because that's a huge first step. So it's natural to feel shocked in that step and to refuse that whatever it is is actually happening to you, so you don't believe it. But this stage allows you time to gradually adjust. And to gradually adjust to the new circumstances. Okay, because change is hard. Change brings on a lot of fear. The second stage, anger. So if you look at that second stage again, it arises as the change becomes more apparent. So you can't ignore it anymore. It's there. You've just got to figure out how to take action. You may experience frustration, resentment, a sense of injustice, and it's important to acknowledge and process these emotions. We love processing emotions. And if you need to talk with me, reach out to me, please. Me or my team, we're here for you. So that you're not hindered and so that you can start that adaptation process. Because it is about being flexible and adapting. Like we want in our workplaces, we want adaptability, adaptability, right? Um, each day brings new challenges and we want a team who is adaptable. Then the third stage, the bargaining. That's where you attempt to negotiate or find ways to cope with the change. So you may seek alternatives, so you maybe keep on looking for answers and things and not actually focus on what's in front of you. But you need to do that. You need to explore avenues so that you can satisfy your curiosity. So these alternatives or You might make deals to regain what you've lost. Um, might be happening, but remember that not all changes are negotiable. So you can't negotiate everything with yourself, and ultimately acceptance is the key and might be necessary for your personal growth. So if we don't accept, then we're not going to want to change anything. But you're here, you've accepted you want to change. Something in your life for all of your life. Okay, I know I hit a point many years ago, and every day I still search for what it is my purpose is. And I know I'm here, it's just getting down to the nitty-gritty, to the details. So I know I'm supposed to be here supporting you. That is my role. That is what I'm supposed to be doing in this life. But everything has led to this. So, um, I would suggest that you don't regret things. Things happen for a reason, for a learning opportunity, and it's about taking the learning out of everything. So once you have this key concept that acceptance is super important, then it is only then that you can move forward. I know, I've been there, done that. Absolutely been there. So what are you stuck on right now? What change do you need to make to better your life. And you might be at one of these stages we've talked about, or you might be further along and be sort of going gung-ho and saying, yes, I have embraced that and I am ready. I am implementing things because I know that change is necessary. So don't avoid that change. You might see it in your workplace. A lot of people find change very challenging. And because it is. And as I mentioned, it brings on fear, it brings on a whole lot of emotions that you might have been suppressing or that hadn't realized were actually there in connection with that change. And you could also apply this in your personal life as well. There might be changes in relationships with your children, with your partners, or with yourself. Okay, and that, that's an epiphany with yourself. That's the biggest one. Change the relationship with yourself. Respect yourself, love yourself, give yourself tenderness, and be easy on yourself. As women in dentistry, we can so easily take on that masculine dominant, um, perspective. And I know in business I'm more like that than feminine, but I do bring a lot of femininity in And I didn't know what I was doing, but I was— my leadership style is very different to others. I am firm in some things, but I also am gentle and approach things in a more gentle manner than others may. So, yeah, you'll know what your leadership style is, and we talk about this in other modules as well, and we figure that out, and we hone in and embrace whatever your style is so that you can better manage teams or even be around colleagues and kind of have good intentions, as we all do, and function really well within the team. So that you're happy and being a team and culture that you blend in with. Back to this chart now. So we know that in this chart, this framework of understanding your emotional responses is really big. So I just want you to remember, and I'm just stressing again, the journey is different for everyone. It is unique, just like you're unique, and it's unique to the experience as well and the change that you're wanting to make happen, or that you might be rebelling against, I guess. And it's going, hey, change is here, time to accept me. So it's about navigating your emotions. Do not ignore them. We are women. We have a lot of emotions, and rightly so, because we perceive things very differently to males as well. And I think we take a more holistic view. I know that we take a more holistic view when things happen. Excuse me. So I want you to know that reaching that place of acceptance and moving forward is your resilience and your adaptability. So we all know that we have that. And we all know that in dentistry we often encounter very significant changes. Changes to all the clinical side, to the management side of dentistry, to the HR side, to ownership, or whether you're buying or setting up a practice. Excuse me. And also within, um, what we want to achieve with our career as well, and what stage we are in our career and our life, and how much balance, how much of each, um, we value, I guess, what each brings in our life and what we truly want versus what we have in front of us. So, um, I want you to know that, uh, You're not alone. You're definitely not alone. And, um, change is omnipresent, so it's present all the time. And there are big changes and little changes. And, um, yeah, I'm just here to, uh, raise your awareness about what actually goes on when we change things. And you are likely going through one or many changes right now. I know that because I've spoken to many of you as well. So these experiences can range from breaking barriers. So it could be barriers within our industry, barriers within your life, barriers within your family. So you might be the first one to have achieved tertiary education in your family, or to have studied and gone to TAFE and achieved and soared and have a really high position in our industry. So, you're breaking barriers, and we all are breaking barriers. And I really want you all to succeed. And I know we face biases, our internal biases, and you'll see the module, if you haven't already looked at that one, about biases, really, really important one about biases. And these days, yes, I know they're not so much as sort of 20, 30 years ago, the biases of the gender equality, but we do still see it unfortunately in the workplace. Um, yeah, there's a still a big male dominance. And yeah, I just, you know, happy for you to discuss. So please, um, write in the comments or just chat with me. Um, yeah, I want to know, I want to know what you're facing. Uh, I don't know if it's more prevalent in larger corporations or businesses, um, but in small business, yeah, it's more avoidable, I guess. Yeah, it's more intimate and everyone's got more of a handle on the needs of individuals. Well, I'd hope so. It's good. I know I do. I know my team and I know what they bring to my practice. So, let's dive a little bit deeper now. I'm going to change the slide. Again, here it is. More little summaries. So number 1, embrace change. That's what I want you to do. I want you to embrace change. And at times we might find ourselves in a state of denial, hesitant to acknowledge the existence of any biases or challenges or anything within our field and our lives. So by embracing the need for change, and I know I always love change, I love new and shiny things, I love things that work, um, And, and that's with regards to processes as well. So it's about really good planning too. However, we want to recognize that change is needed. So change is needed for the progression of our personal growth, the progression of our industry, the progression of our businesses. And we empower ourselves by bringing new things in. And you're not always going to have people on board. How many times have you brought in a new policy, or have you seen a policy in your workplace and you just go, "Oh, not another change," or you've had team members who just have been resistant. So they've got to decide somewhere along this gorgeous chart, decide whether they're going to embrace the change, and if they're not, then they don't belong. OK? It's just black or white. And some people just don't like change or they're not ready or they've got other things, maybe too much change happening in their life. This is just like the final straw. Um, so by empowering ourselves, we overcome obstacles and we create a more sort of happy environment and a more forward-thinking environment. I think that's super important. You'll see fear, you'll see resistance, you'll see lack of confidence— that's another big one within there— and they're going to come up for you when you're in this first state, the shock state or the denial state. Yeah, right. I want you next to ignite your passion. So as we become aware of barriers and things that might be around us that could be stopping us from embracing change, and only you know these, but I'm happy to find out, I'd love to know. It's natural to feel anger and frustration. Okay, supernatural. So I want you to channel that anger and frustration. So it's about that mindset, the positive mindset. So our lovely module on mindset is vital here. If you haven't seen, or if you watched it a while ago, go back to it. Just, uh, go into your, um, above it, Leading Dental Woman course, and you just search in the headers mindset. You will find it. It'll be in there. It's the easiest way to look for it. So I want you to channel that energy into fueling your passion, fueling your pursuit for whatever it is that you are wanting to change. Flip it. Yeah, you flip it to the other side of the coin. And by doing that, you're going to welcome change more, more so. You're not going to repel it and be resistant to it. So break down those barriers that you've got within you that are surrounding you as well, and do pave your way to your future. I just realized I'm hunching over, I'm just, yeah, I'll bring my computer closer. That's better, that's better posture. Posture, dental posture. Then the next thing I would love you to do is to empower yourself through collaboration. So in Leading Dental Women, particularly, we have some beautiful women here who are powerhouses. You're all powerhouses in your beautiful minds. And together, you never know what you're going to come up with. So change will be much easier because being around people— and we know science shows being around people who are similar to you uplifts you, and you just go to the next level with everything. Okay, I'm sure some of you have already seen that even by doing these exercises and watching the module videos or listening to them in the car while you're driving home, whatever it takes. Pop them on, you know, while you're cooking. I'd love to know when do you listen to the videos and watch the videos, then I can, uh, spice them up as well, um, make them really fun. So really important to have mentors, and the women in this group are mentors. We have some beautiful women here. As I said, I am your mentor. I'm your number one mentor and number one cheerleader. I want to see you succeed and break barriers. So seek out talking to the women in this group, messaging. I know we've all got busy lives. Message, interact with each other, chat group. We've got our Facebook group Leading Your Torment. This is what it's about. I want you to interact and to post. I will post videos, I will post things to nudge you and to hold you accountable. Absolutely. So you want to be around women like this in here who are like-minded. And even in outside your life, outside your— in your personal life as well, you want to surround yourself with people who are like you. So if someone, for example, likes to go binge drinking every weekend and you're like, I really don't agree with that, you're not going to hang out with them, right? Because if you do, chances are you're going to pick up some bad habits, and then your life and other parts in your life will fall into bits, or you'll get really bored and go, what am I doing here? Why am I wasting my time? So you'll come to some realization at some point. Um, our dental profession can be very isolating, and I know firsthand, no matter how many people you work with in your team, you're focused, you've got a mission. Every day you're switching from patient to patient to patient to patient. Treat them, or you're, um, servicing patients, um, and the reception, it's a lot of talk, a lot of energy needed for all of that. See who else is on. Who's on here? I'm presenting to 2 people. Amazing. Don't mind me. Empower yourself through collaboration. We face challenges all the time, and by engaging together, great minds, right? Great minds. You get rid of that bias. You hear me talk about bias again. I like correlating things and connecting them, and you'll find your own connections as well. I'm just facilitating a few connections. You want to drive positive change. So within this group, the women here want positive change. You are not wanting to stay stuck or within a life that you loathe or within a career that you want to escape from prematurely and leave. So share your vision here. Share your challenges. Share everything you need to share. It's a very safe group, Leading Dental Women on Facebook. Absolutely. Um, together our voices, even through just talking it out, our voices and supporting one another and advocating for all our challenges to be overcome, is what we're all about, so that we can change our life. Because that's what you're here for. There's a part of your life that you're searching for, you're searching answers for. And the answers are within you, you know that. And then we get to resilience. I talked about resilience earlier. We want to cultivate resilience. I want to cultivate it within you, and then you also in your life and in your workplace, in your career, in every facet possible. So there may be times when the weight of the challenge feels overwhelming. Don't we all feel overwhelmed at times? How do you get out of overwhelm? Do you ignore it, or do you have to face the challenge? Right, the only way to get out of overwhelm, you know, is to face the challenge, do something about it. Take action. Big keyword today, take action. So resilience is the foundation of our strength. And take the time to nurture your wellbeing. Your wellness, okay, whatever that means for you, both physically and emotionally. Talk it out, reach out to another woman here, to another lady here, reach out to me, need to have a chat, okay. Sometimes you just need to be heard because we don't all have that huge support network behind us of family, and a lot of the time, even if you do, they may not understand. Partners may not understand. I hear all the time, my partner's non-dental, they don't understand what I'm going through, and I just don't have the energy to explain it. And I can tell you, I've been there. My partner's not dental, okay? And after 8 years, my partner Peter has truly immersed himself within dentistry now, and he's learning every facet of the business and training as well. So there comes a time when if people are going to come around, they will. But yeah, you need to reach out to, um, the women here. We're all going through very similar things. We're in the dental industry. We might be having different experiences, but at the end of the day, they all come to the core of dentistry. And it's really lovely to hear about these and also to, to get advice or opinions from other women who who, you know, have your best intentions. And this is what we're all about here. So seek the support. It is right here in this group. I want you to know that you can trust whatever you say is safe. And we're all professionals, and we're all people. At the end of the, at the end of the day, we're all people, and we want to see others happy. So we can rise together. And any setbacks can become challenges we can completely overcome. Absolutely. So then the, the last thing is leading with confidence, and we have a whole module on leading with confidence. Our classes are called Leading with Confidence or Lead with Confidence. So as we navigate this change curve, we arrive at a place of acceptance. So I talked about that earlier, a place of acceptance. Where we then begin to experiment. Okay, we begin to experiment and we have made that decision, that decision to change our life. And then guess what? It becomes a normal part of our life. The integration is there. And then we look back and go, gee, what a wonderful journey. Or we go, oh my goodness, I'm exhausted, right? But you sometimes look back at when you've gone through challenges and go, I don't know how I got here, but I did. So you obviously went through a process., and this is the process. So acceptance is not simply surrendering or compromising, but rather realizing that you have the power to shape your own desires. And I want to stress that to you today. Embrace your unique strengths, your talents, your insights as a woman in dentistry, and lead your life with confidence. I'm not just talking work. I want to do just Don't look at my posture now. So I'm leaning forward so I can look at— so I want you to just shake everything out. Take your hands, wave them around, do whatever it takes. Get that energy pumping in your body because you probably listen to me. So you could be in the car waving, you could be, um, at work or standing up at home. Shake everything out. Shake your legs, your arms, because you've made that decision to learn. And every new situation is a decision, opportunity to learn. And so the only way is up from here. The only way to get above things is by going through this curve, this Kübler-Ross change curve. Okay, that's one key point there. This is the last thing I'm going to go through very, very shortly. Every time you learn something new, it is normal to feel these emotions. It is normal to go through this change. And keep that in mind when you're training your teams as well. So you may have resistance initially, then you have people come on board, and then they will embrace it, and then they'll be like, I didn't realize, or I don't even know why I had resistance to it. It's just normal. Um, and as I mentioned earlier, some people just won't come to the party, so you know they're not aligned with you. But a lot of people do, as long as they make that decision that change is a positive thing. If they're stuck in their ways, you can't change them. But sometimes, yeah, look, I'm so happy if you play them some of these videos. Play your change, some of these videos. I really want you to do that. Anything you think is related to them or can enhance your team, your family, play it to your partners. Play it to your children if they're old enough. Super important. So keep that in mind when putting new ideas out. And also in giving feedback too. And we've got a module on feedback, which you may or may not have already watched. So really, really important. Remember, as a woman, you have the ability to make profound changes and impact in every part of your life. So I want you to learn to embrace change if you haven't already. Embracing change is the way of the future. So Let's stand tall. Let's take it on the chin as we do. Go through our little stages of change. And as you do more and more challenges, you'll get through them quicker and quicker. And also depends, it depends on the intensity of whatever change it is that's going to happen. Trust it. Implement it. And know that things will happen. And embrace change. So give it a big hug. Say thank you for being here rather than, oh my gosh, change is here again, how am I going to do this? So if you sit there moping about change and being so negative, you're not going to be doing anything about it. So I want you to know that change is where the magic happens. Be real with yourself, and as the last slide said, remember that you are your foundation for your success. So leave it here. Embrace change. Key message here: you are the answer. I'll see you in another lesson. Have a great day.