The Real Reason You Care What People Think (And How To Stop)

For you, what is your tongue saying or doing, or are you biting your tongue and not really speaking your mind in fear of something bad happening or conversations that will spur or ignite a volcano of emotions? Okay, a lot of the time we place identity labels on ourselves. Hi, I'm a dentist. Hi, I'm a parent. Hi, I'm a wife. I think the secret to everything, and I know, is to take those labels away because just be you. Pretend you're naked somewhere. I don't want to picture you guys naked. I don't want you to picture me naked, but pretend you're naked somewhere and you're put like in nature somewhere and you're just standing and it's just you. No degrees, no titles, no certificates, nothing. Who are you? Who are you really? The naked you, like strip everything bare, because that's who you really need to be. That's who you need to tune into. And so be very mindful of what your tongue says. Be very mindful of letting emotions get in the way and making that transcribe into something totally different. I'm guilty of it too. I get heated. I'm very passionate, as you all know, very passionate. And sometimes I do need to bite my tongue and wait and wait for like 12 hours, 24 hours, 3 hours, whatever it is. Take a walk, an hour, and then address that elephant in the room. Now, thoughts. We've all got these thoughts. Our thoughts, as I know, as you know, and as I always say, create our reality. And I think I mentioned earlier, do a cleansing process of your thoughts. And I want you to write down all the bad thoughts you have, okay? There was a point where I even considered killing myself, right? This was before Peter. You think, "What for?" I was a young woman, really beautiful young woman, who thought the world was the end because I was so lonely, hated my job in pharmacy, stuck in the dungeon in a hospital, so negative. My positive part of the day was going up to the wards. I haven't told many people, right? It's not something you want to say, but we all have times where we have thoughts and we can control those thoughts. And at that moment I'm like, don't be stupid, Vick. Like, you have everything to live for. How much would I have missed out on if I'd done something stupid and driven into a wall on the M4? And the M4 is like a big highway. It's not the end of the world, even if you think it's the end of the world. There is always a solution to your problem and you are never gifted problems. Gifted is the word. That you cannot resolve. You're up for challenges, okay? Speak to the higher power, speak to your higher self if you're more into, into that. I'm into all of it, right? There's a higher self of you. If you've never heard of the higher self, um, I'm probably not going to explain it well, but it is a version of you that you have not met yet. It is that empowered version of you who sees life and everything in a very different perspective and who shows up, shows up in a very different way. So I want you to think of the new year and this last week or two of the new year as your cleansing. So important because if you imagine there's two trees, right? There's a tree of life and the tree of good and evil and a lot of the time we swing like a monkey between both those trees. Which tree do you want to hang out more in? Is it the good and evil tree, or is it the tree of life? We all know tree of life. Your life can look so different. I didn't know that me saying yes in the start of this year would lead to all of this, and I'm just getting started. You have no idea what's ahead if you don't allow some doors to close. See, there's some decisions that you're holding on to that you need to make with yourself, or with your partner, with your husband, with your wife, that will change your life. And it's not just like ultimatums. I'm great with ultimatums, alright? And that's when Peter gets a kick up the butt. Like, Peter, it's this or that! And I don't say it jokingly. But sometimes you do have to say ultimatums. You do have to have those tough conversations with your husband, wife, partner, or even with your parents or your kids if you've got older kids. You've gotta have those conversations. Always have kindness, joy, focus on joy, self-control. That's a big one. And if you're going to In Your Element, like Peter goes, oh my gosh, like he's just starting, like I think it's in this, in the second, I think it's in fire, it's about self-control. And he goes, that really hit home, self-control. So go back, make that your project over the week, like rather than reading a book over the next holidays, go back and watch them in time and a half. I think Peter's actually watching them in normal time. He goes, I just want to absorb it and then I'll re-listen to it. It'll hit home differently. I even go back and listen to my own lessons because I forgot a lot of the time that they're the first lessons that I needed to learn to get me to where I am. And I share them with you guys, okay? Patience. Patience is a virtue. Patience will get you where you need to go. Now, your belief, your identity, your respect for yourself and for others is pivotal. You need to have belief. If I don't believe I'm good enough, as good as Tony Robbins, for example, as good as the best person in dentistry, as good as, I don't know, I don't really have huge role models, but I'm learning to do that, okay? I've never been someone who had posters of people in my bedroom, But maybe you do, so it's easier for you to do this. That's why I can't come up with names. I've run my own race, and I think I've just been observant. That's how I work. You may have posters and people up, and you might remember who you've had up through your childhood and even adulthood, who you've got on your vision board right now as well. Who do you look up to? You're just as good as them. If it's me, you're even better than me. I want you to be better than me, right? This is what I mean by win-win-win-win. When people around you want you to succeed, you're around the right people. And that's been one of my things that I've learned through the years as well. If people are holding me back with their fears, not necessarily that they're evil or bad or good or anything like that. People have fears. People don't have your brain. Yep. Please, yes, thank you. I'm so grateful you look up to me. I hope I'm a good example. I'm doing my thing and I want you to do your thing and I will help empower you to do your thing. You've just got to Message me, go, "I'm thinking this." I'm like, "Good, let's make it happen." Even if it's a problem, go, "Shit." Excuse my French. "I'm so stuck, Vic. I don't know what to do." I know many of you have reached out to me and I talk to many of you. You have me in your pocket. At some point, those in this program, if you're listening, will have the AI me and maybe you get me once a month. That's how it's looking. But you guys right now have me. And sometimes it's just a few words in a text that will change and shift that mindset of yours. And I posted something today, mindset and my willingness are two things that have shifted my life through the years and got me to achieve things. Like when I said, "I'm gonna be a pharmacist," even though I really didn't say that. When I said, "I'm gonna finish this degree even though I hate it," that's what went through my mind. Dentistry, when I woke up and said to my parents, "I'm gonna do dentistry," because I thought that's where freedom and money lied. Wrong. How wrong was I in the traditional form? There is freedom in money, but for me, because me, it's so weird. Through school, I was really good at languages and art, and I know some of you here are really good at other things other than maths, 4-unit science, and 3-unit English, all that stuff. However, I did all those subjects too, so that's where the confusion came for me, where I'm like, I'm really good at whatever I put my mind to, and all of you are the same. You need to start leaning into that intuition. How do you do that? Get back to gratitude, okay? This is a really good book. Peter's got it by his bed. I'm gonna go grab it. I go, Peter, you've never opened this book. Can you read it to us every morning? And he does now. If you're like me, like, he's even got his sticky notes, right? He's got his sticky notes. If you're like me and I'm like, I wanna make things easy, I don't wanna have to think too much. This is an awesome book to get off Amazon, okay? Sunrise Gratitude. So if I go to today, I'm gonna read it, okay? Today's 22nd here, okay? 22nd, I'm pretty sure it's 22nd. Your body is intelligent. So it comes up with the date and a little gratitude paragraph, okay? Your body is intelligent and provides clues about what it needs. Or is it the 23rd today? Anyway, I'll read both because I think this is important. Obviously had to read it to you. So whoever's 22nd and 23rd watching, watching this or, um, on replay, pretend it's today. That's the message you need to get today. Your body is intelligent and provides clues about what it needs. When we are in touch with our intuition— my goodness, I was talking about intuition. Maybe I was triggered like when you read it yesterday. And we can easily pay attention to the clues our body gives. By tapping into our inner wisdom, we can live a healthier and more vibrant life. Nourish your body and mind today. And how weird is it what I read earlier? You gotta like your wellness, you gotta nourish your body and your mind. Pay attention to what your body is telling you. Make your health a priority and show your body deep respect and appreciation. This is exactly what I'm doing, and I needed a mentor to get my butt kicked like Andy Elliott, right? This is what I paid for. This is what I invested in. Better quality me. Okay, let me be that for you. So this morning I didn't want to go to the gym, so I went and did my workout and I did Pilates and I feel really great. But the reason I had time is because I've also shifted how I make money, what my livelihood is, how I spend my days, even in the school holidays with 3 kids home.