108. Why I Have A Coach

Hey. Hey. Welcome back to Friday Bullpen Sessions. My name is Andy Neary, and this is episode 108. Today I want to talk to you about why you need a coach. I'm going to talk to you about why I have a coach. Because I think there's a theory out there that, you know, for you to have success, you got to go it alone. And I want to share with you today why that's just not the case. I want to share with you today why you need somebody else to help you, guide you along the path you're looking to go down.

You know. You know, you know me well enough. You've been listening in. I come from a sports background, whether it was playing baseball, whether it was playing football, basketball, you name it. Every sport that I ever played in my life had a coach, right? And I think about all the coaches I had in my baseball career.

And I look back at the lessons I learned from each and every one of them. Some good, some bad. I know for a fact that there was no way in hell I would have ever played professional baseball without the help of a coach. Now, I will say I had a distinct advantage that I grew up in a house with a coach, right? My dad was a. It was a longtime head coach at Oconomowoc High School, where I went to school. So growing up, from the time I was a little kid barely walking to the time I graduated from high school, I had my dad in the house, baseball coach, always teaching me along the way. In fact, my dad was my coach, often my coach in Little League, middle school, right on into high school. So I will say, yes, I had a distinct advantage growing up when it came to the skills, the knowledge, the mentorship that one needs to become better at a sport, especially like a sport like baseball. But that also is why I'm doing this podcast episode today, is I want to talk to you about why you need a coach in your life. Now, you might be playing a sport right now, or you might be in business. You might be running your own business. You still need a coach. And today I want to talk to you about what I've learned by working with my most recent coach and how I think it can help you definitely shorten the path to the goals you're trying to reach right now. So let me take you back about.

Three years ago. Three years ago, I was introduced to a man who has now become a friend of mine and a business colleague, Jerry Sandusky. Now, yes, I just said Jerry Sandusky, but I want your head to go to a different place. That's Jerry with a G. Not Jerry, the famous, infamous Jerry Sandusky from Penn State University. No, this is Jerry Sandusky, the sports voice of the Baltimore Ravens. The the broadcaster, play by play announcer for the Baltimore Ravens, also the host of the sports edition of the Baltimore News. But I was introduced to Jerry via a colleague of mine, Eric Silverman, about three years ago. And I had hired Jerry at that time to be as a speaking coach. I was ready to take my speaking career to the next level. I knew that I couldn't do it alone. I knew I needed some guidance. So I hired Jerry. And what morphed or what evolved into that coaching relationship is Jerry became more than just a speaking coach. He actually became a business coach. And I learned a lot of lessons from Jerry in our monthly calls that we had for a good year and a half. Now at that time, fast forward a year and a half later, Jerry got busy, I got busy. The coaching relationship just kind of morphed into a business partnership in a way, as we have now gone on to do some things in business. But at that time, instead of having a one on one coach, I decided to join a mastermind. Now masterminds are another form of coaching, right? Except you're not getting as much one on one. You're in a group, you're collaborating. So I decided to join the Fast Foundations mastermind, which was a mastermind and still is a mastermind dedicated to helping startup entrepreneurs, which I was at the ripe old age of 40 years old. And so I joined Chris Harder's Fast Foundation's mastermind to get the knowledge, the mentorship from Chris and his wife Lori, as well as the collaboration from other first time entrepreneurs. So I did that for a while, for about two years, year and a half, two years. And then heading into 2020, I decided that it was time to get to work. I wasn't going to rejoin Fast Foundations. I did, did not have a one on one coach at that time because it was time for me to get my hands dirty. It was time for me to get to work. I didn't think I needed a coach. You're going to see how I set this up and why that was a mistake. So 2020 kicks in. As, as, as we all know, by March 2020, shit had hit the fan. The world as we knew it had changed forever. But I was still mentally strong. I was still really focused on where I was taking this coaching business. Now fast forward three months, it's now June, July. I quickly realized that something was missing in my life. And what I was missing was that coach that I had always had, quite frankly, up until man.

Last year. I had a coach in my life in some way, shape or form. Whether it was living with my dad for over 18 years as his son, in his house, playing for my dad, playing for my coaches, Scotty Duff and Jerry Augustine in college, playing for the coach, coaches and pro baseball that I had. And then the mentors and the coaches I had all along the way in my business career. This was really the first time I was on my own. I wasn't working for anybody anymore, right. I was an entrepreneur. I had my own business, no coach, no mastermind. I was literally out on an island. And by mid summer it hit me that this is what I'm missing. Because anybody listening in, if you're an entrepreneur, you know, this is a lonely world. And this business, Your business is 100% your responsibility. It is going to succeed with you, it is going to die with you. And so I let that simmer in my head for a good two, three months. And then by September, I knew something had to change.

And I knew that if I was going to take my business to the next level, I knew I needed to get a coach back in my life. But I didn't know which way I was going to turn. I had looked at some coaches that I, that I really wanted to aspire, really wanted to, to hire at that time. But quite frankly, some of them were out of my financial range of what it would cost to work with them on an annual basis. So instead of making a decision, I kind of let it. I allowed myself to delay the decision for a while. But then it hit me.

I realized.

That I had to take the time before I hired a coach just to say I had a coach. I had to sit down and really write out a list of what I was looking in, looking for in a coach.

And this is late September. I had at that point about four one on one coaching clients. So the cupboard was far from full.

And I sat down and I made a list of the attributes, what I needed from a coach. And this is important, I want you to listen in because I think, I think a lot of people hire the coach with the expectation that they're going to have every single answer. They're going to have the silver bullet, they're going to have the hack. I get it once in a while when people are looking to hire me for my coaching services, they're looking for the silver bullet. They think Andy is going to Be the savior that's going to bring me all of the gold I've been looking for and that's been avoiding me. You'll see what I mean. When I made that list of who and what I was looking for in a coach, I realized what I need more than anything is somebody who's going to push me, somebody who's going to hold me extremely accountable. Somebody who's going to call my ass out when it needs to be called out. Somebody who's going to be direct with me. They're not going to tell me what I want to hear, they're going to tell me what I need to hear. Yes, they're going to have some answers. They're going to help me create a plan. But more important than anything, I needed somebody who also was going to give me confidence. You see, one area of my life I struggle with the most and I'm willing to admit this publicly on a podcast, is confidence, self worth. Yes, I have self doubts. I'm sure you do too. So I said I need this more than anything from a coach. Accountability. Somebody's going to be direct. Somebody's going to tell me exactly what I need to hear. Not what I want to hear, but also somebody who's going to instill that self worth and that confidence in me. And here's the other epiphany I had. Epiphany I had in that moment.

My entire life has been surrounded by getting that kind of coaching, quote unquote from women in my life. Believe it or not, I have a very independent mom, I have a very independent sister. Amy, my girlfriend is very independent. My entire life I have been given guidance from some coaches, some indirect coaches that I wasn't acknowledging up until that point. And this is when it hit me, maybe it's time to seek a female coach.

So I thought about it. I said, who can I look for? Who can I go after? Who can I seek that's going to be female, that's going to be direct, that's going to tell me what I need to hear, that's going to give me that confidence. And that's when it hit me. Christina, look here.

I had been in fast foundations with her. She has known her expertise, her niche is confidence, self worth.

And so early October I decided to hire Christina. And I will tell you Fast forward to April 2021. Just a short six, seven months later, my one on one clients are full. I really can't even take anymore right now. My academy is running, things are going great. But here's the Lesson I want to teach you today, it's not to talk about my successes, is to talk about what I have learned in the last six to seven months by coaching with Christina. The first lesson is extreme accountability. If there is one thing Christina does better than anything else, it's to hold me accountable. We meet once a week, and every single week, I walk away from our coaching call with an assignment, with homework, with something that's going to stretch me, something that's going to make me uncomfortable, that I have to try to accomplish by the next time we get together. And throughout that week, trust me, I'm getting messages, I'm getting voxers, I'm getting little notes from Christina saying, did you do it? Where are you at? Why aren't you doing it? So, accountability, hands down, number one. The second thing that coaching has brought back into my life more than anything is consistency. You see, just the fact I know I'm going to be meeting with Christina once a week. It has made me realize how important consistency is in my life. Now, there are many areas in my life I have been consistent for a long, long time. Taking care of my body, taking care of my health, taking care of my mind. Those are all very important things. But there are so many other areas of my life where consistency was lacking in business, in my relationships. And trust me, I am still a work in progress in many of those areas. But consistent consistency is something that has really been locked in ever since Christina and I engaged in our coaching relationship.

And then the third lesson I learned is the clarity that has come about from our coaching sessions. Because when you have that clarity, when I walk out, I leave our coaching call with the clarity. It does absolute wonders for my confidence because one bleeds right into another. When you have clarity, you will have confidence, which ultimately leads to that massive action that I always talk about. And this is why it is so important for you to have a coach in your life right now. Whether you are an athlete in high school, in college, professional sports, or you're a business executive or you're that aspiring young professional who wants to become a leader of your organization, who wants to own your own business, at some point, you need a coach in your life. Why? Not? Because they've got every single freaking answer. Not because they have the playbook or the silver bullet or that hack that's going to take your career to the next level. No, no, no, no, no, no. If that's what looking for in a coach, stop. There's no coach who's going to be a good fit for You. But.

If you're looking for accountability right now, you know that somebody could be busting your ass a little harder than you are yourself right now. If you're looking to show up consistently. Consistently. If you're looking to show up every single day and do the uncomfortable, the dirty work no one else wants to do, and then you're looking for that clarity, that path, that one unlock that you need that's going to give you the confidence that you've been missing to take the action you need to achieve the goals you want. That is what a coach is for. So, Christina, if you're listening in right now, I want to thank you. You have done wonders for my business. I'm excited to continue our coaching relationship well on into the future. And if you're listening in right now and you are lacking a coach and you're going, you know, I know that certain areas of my life could be a bit better, whether it's my sport, if you are an athlete, whether it's your business, your sales, your relationships, your health, whatever it might be. I want you to sit down today and I want you to think about what you want in a coach. What are the results you want to get from a coach. But most importantly, I will tell you if There are three things I am telling you today to look for in a coach. It's accountability, it's consistency, and it's that clarity that breeds confidence to help you take that massive action you need to start taking today. So do that today. Go out, make a list. Go find the coach you've been missing in your life and let him or her hold your ass accountable. Because I promise, if you just show up every day, show up consistently, and have that coach in your life holding you accountable, magical things are going to happen. Because you know what happens when clarity and confidence collide. Massive action happens. Go make it happen today.