Dr. Cara, a psychotherapist, argues that real leadership comes from genuinely seeing each person on your team, not controlling them. She draws from therapy breakthroughs to show how curiosity about someone's story and motivations creates actual influence. This works whether you're extroverted or not, if you listen with intention.
I began thinking about my most meaningful moments as a psychotherapist. The breakthrough moments came when I truly saw each person as unique, met them where they were, understood their story and connected with what drove them. What if leadership worked the same way? What if instead of treating my team as a group to manage, I approached each person the way I approached my clients with genuine curiosity about their passions, their motivations, what made them feel seen and valued. That's when I realized leadership is more than learning completely new skills. It's about expanding my understanding of human behavior and applying my person centered approach to how I lead. Because every person I lead is unique with their own story, their own passion, and their own way of contributing. Some of you may be thinking, that's all and good, Dr. Kara, but I'm not naturally outgoing. I'm an introvert. I don't just talk to strangers in the elevator. Trust me, I get it. Here's the beautiful thing. This isn't about being extroverted or chatty. This is about recognizing that connection doesn't require personality changes. It requires intention. Think about your own life. When has someone's genuine attention changed your day? Maybe it was a cashier who actually looked at you and smiled, or a co worker who asked how you were doing and waited for the real answer.
