🧔🏻 Evolution of Will

Hi, my name is Will Aha. I live in Collegeville, Pennsylvania, which is a little town outside of Philly. I'm 29 years old. I do sales and marketing for a company that puts in automation systems for pharmaceutical companies, and my current hobbies are powerlifting, jiu-jitsu, and experiencing life with my beautiful wife.

Welcome to The Girl with the Red Door. On this podcast, you will hear from people from all different walks of life sharing their real and raw experiences through their journey in this life. I don't like to bullshit, so here we go. Happy Tuesday, pumpkins! Okay, this is the first time since November that I missed my Monday, uh, my Monday release. I'm sorry about that. And also, I really like the term pumpkins because really the context could be used as pumpkin pie haircutted freak, like in Dumb and Dumber, or it could mean something cutesy like pumpkin pie. So it's kind of fun because you really will never know in what context I'm using it.

It's just all how you want to perceive it, I guess.

I'm so happy to be in your ears again. Like I said a few episodes ago, I will just on a whim decide to jump into a project, and I did that again a couple weeks ago. I said, Kurt, it's time to rip up our carpet and finish our wood floor, and within 10 minutes I was ripping up all of the carpet and just kind of volunteered him to help me finish it. So this past weekend we sanded and stained and then decided that we hated the stain, so sanded and polished again. Over Easter there was dust fucking everywhere. Yesterday was just a cleaning day, which also resulted in a Target run, which All of you know that when you go to Target, you find 87 things that weren't on your list, but things that you definitely needed. And I found lots and lots of those. So through my cleaning day and Target run, it was also like a redecorating upgrade every bedroom day, which has been super fun. That's why I missed the Monday release. But let's get to my guest. I have known this man since we were just little kids growing up. I think we met when we were 6 or 7. We went to elementary together. He's only a couple weeks older than me. We were super close with their family. He was, uh, somebody that was a really good friend in my first life. And then, um, we, we kept in contact when we moved to Arizona. They moved to Arizona. A few years later, and he actually came to my graduation, which was badass. We just have always remained friends, and this is his story.

A couple podcast episodes ago, I talked about Life One, which was Life in Cortez. So then of course I was like all nostalgic and I was like, oh my gosh, I need to reach out to Will. And see if he would be interested, because I know that life has just taken you in so many amazing places. And so I wanted to just kind of hear your story.

Yeah, that's awesome. No, I'm glad you reached out. That's, that's pretty cool. I appreciate you thinking of me. Life has actually been pretty interesting since then. And I guess I talk to my mom about this a lot, but I've got to see and do things that I never really thought that I would get a chance to. And so it's kind of Interesting. I was reminiscing with my wife about that this weekend that we really have built a really neat and interesting life. And sometimes I guess I take it for granted just because I like to document a lot of what we do on social media, which that's changed a lot too. It used to be for the purposes of like, hey, here's what we're doing. And now it's more like it's a good place to have a record of what you're doing. Not so much like a, hey, here's what we're doing type of thing. But yeah. So after college, I went to work for a company called Rockwell Automation. In the sales department and actually thought that I was going to be an engineer for them. So I went out to interview and instead they had me join the sales side of it. And I was in a pretty cool training program, got to go to a bunch of different places. So I mean, I mean, keep in mind, like I hadn't really traveled very much up until this point. And then all of a sudden it was like I was living in Boston. So I got to live right in downtown Boston for a couple of months. Uh, and then I moved to, uh, Cleveland and I was in Milwaukee. Um, got to live in Philadelphia and then I even got a chance to, to be in New York just for a little small time. Um, and so I, I got to jump around a bunch of different places and that was, I think that was a really strange defining moment for me because I went from being in college, being very close to my parents and my family. Um, and my sister and all of a sudden, you know, I kind of always had in the back of my mind, like I will return to Arizona at some point.

Yeah.

You know, because that's just, you know, that's what you do, right? And I went and traveled and just absolutely fell in love with this area of the country that I had never even been to before. And I love the East Coast. I love everything about being here. I mean, I love the climate. The people were so close to DC and New York and Boston and met my wife out here, went through so many different transitions in my life and kind of found out who I was and what makes me happy and really worked on a lot of things that I think everyone tries to work on during that time period and then settled down here. And I mean, I've got to live in a really cool place. My wife and I have got to travel to some really neat places. So we've been to Portugal, we went to Spain, we've been to Switzerland, and we got to go to India last year as well, which was probably the coolest place I've ever been, period. So it's definitely been a very cool journey that I'm very, very grateful for. I just sometimes I think that you can get so caught up in it that you take it for granted, you know.

Me watching you over the last several years, even though we haven't spoke, it almost feels like I've still got to experience little tidbits of your life and your journey. And so as you talk about the East Coast, like, I remember seeing that you moved out there and then meeting your wife. And so tell me kind of about how you guys met. Was it through work or How did that happen?

Oh yeah, it was totally through work. So I was actually her mentor, which made it a very interesting meeting experience. And actually we met right as I was making a transition to a new career with a new company. And so, but she had come on board to the same office that I was in and I was her mentor and we hit it off right away. And I think that I kind of knew and she kind of knew that something was happening there. And I mean, it, we very quickly realized that there's that— I think that sometimes you meet people in life that there's just this undeniable connection that you have with them. And I mean, it's something so much more. And it's so funny because you always hear it. I always thought it was the corniest thing ever growing up. It's like, oh, you'll find love one day. And like, when you know, you know. And I always thought that was the most ridiculous thing. And then I met Jay and it was like, you know, you know. It's like you just click with a person and you fold with them in a way that you've never experienced before. And you can share things with them that you never thought that you would share with people and you can really see building a life. It's almost like you can fast forward and see building this life and having kids and growing old together. And so, I met her and I think we have such a strong relationship because— and it's something that we don't even see as a problem anymore. We get asked about it so much. It kind of cracks me up of like, "How do you— like you're two separate religions. How does that work?" And it's totally not a big deal. But her being Hindu and being a separate religion made our relationship at the beginning very interesting because you kind of like when you see where it's headed to, you know that like your view of the future is all the positive things and you know that there's going to be a lot of decisions to be made leading up to that. And so in true, because she's an engineer as well, in true engineering fashion, we sat down and hashed out like all the very difficult things that you would talk about in a multi-religion type relationship right there. So, it's like we thought that it was going somewhere in the first couple of months. And so, we sat down and had a whole big conversation of, "Okay, well, how would we raise kids and what does it look like for holidays and what are some no-nos from your side and what is acceptable and what isn't acceptable and what are our parents going to think and things like that?" And so, I think that that That trial by fire made our relationship so strong that everything since then has been a breeze. I mean, it just, it just feels like a walk in the park.

Yeah, that's super admirable. I feel like sometimes you almost wait until it comes up and then you're like, oh shit, now we have kids. Like, okay, this is important to you. This is important to me. Like, how are we going to mold it all together? So I love that you guys just like hashed it all out and figured it out, even though I'm sure once you do have kids, it'll be like a whole, whole different ballgame because it'll be real.

Oh, of course, of course. And not that it'll run exactly to plan, but I think something that we talked about is that there would be so many challenges, whether from family or community members or whatever it may be. And our family is super supportive. So there's not challenges from that side. We just knew that there would be some obstacles to get through. And I think that something that worked out really well that I think is just a general thing that we've learned about marriage just early in our own is that you can't expect that someone is going to change after you get married. And even marriage, like outside of marriage, after you get into a relationship, if there's issues that you have, it's good to bring them up and maybe not expect the other person to fix them, but at least gain perspective on why they do or think a certain thing that, that you may not necessarily agree or may make you upset. Because knowing that ahead of time makes it so much easier. Because I think that Some people expect, like, you get married and all of a sudden everything's different and it's not going to be different. It's going to be like once the newness wears off, it's going to be just like it was before.

Oh, yeah. I was actually just talking to a friend and we were talking about— I'm reading this book, The Untethered Soul, which is super good. And he talks a lot about being like, you are not your emotions, you are self and detaching. And there's so much that goes along with it. And so we were kind of talking about that book and she She was saying that she heard this analogy that when you get into a relationship, you each have backpacks on and you have all of these boulders that you've just taken along the way. So all growing up, you just keep packing your backpack full of boulders with experiences and different viewpoints and just different things that have happened. And so now, you know, we're coming into this relationship nearing 30. And we, we both have these backpacks full of boulders that we have to like unpack. And you're also like carrying their backpack as well. And so it was just a good analogy to be like, oh wow, I guess I never really thought about like you're bringing two realities and two completely different backgrounds and experiences together and now you're trying to like mold them into one.

Absolutely. And I mean, you end up carrying and shouldering the other person's burdens in a lot of ways and dealing with their problems. And, you know, and you kind of— it's interesting because you definitely retain an area of you being your own person, but there's a lot of like— I think a relationship causes your personalities to merge in a lot of ways. And I think that with certain things that you almost see the boundaries of, you know, where your personality begins and theirs ends start to meld a little bit. And I think that's just part of the process. You know, part of that is carrying those boulders, so to speak.

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And something I've noticed is like I act a lot like my dad in several ways of how he deals with things. And so it did really set the stage and kind of showed me like, okay, here's, you know, here's what it can be and here's things that you can take and here's things that you can learn from. And I definitely think that that helped out a lot and gave me at least a perspective for for what it's like. But I mean, it doesn't, it also doesn't show you everything. I think it's, as I'm sure that we'll experience at some point, it's a lot like having kids in the sense that you can read a lot of books and get a lot of advice from parents, but until you're up on that first night, you know, with your, with your child, it's, you don't really know it until you experience it.

Did you ever view your parents as, did you just view them as mom and dad or did you view, did you view them as like human beings with their own separate, like feelings and emotions and like when they made choices, you were like, you were totally understanding of them? Or were you like, what the heck? Like, that's my mom or that's my dad. Like, at what point did you view them as like complete individuals?

I think that that has probably happened in the last couple of years. And it's weird that you say that because, um, I never really put words to, to the feeling that I was having until you just described it. And It's weird to see that transition because I think up until a few years ago, there's this idea that your parents are your parents and what they do. There's almost this view as if they are unhuman in a lot of ways. You don't judge them in the same way or you don't hold them to the same standards in that regard because they're your parents. And then, I think as I have gotten older and have had to make some decisions and had to do things and things that they mentioned when I was growing up are now starting to make sense because I'm actually half to do those things, uh, it's weird because you start seeing them a little bit more human. Like you start seeing that they're making decisions because, uh, they're human or that they're doing certain things because they're human. And, and it is, it's a strange transition. And my sister and I are actually going through it at the same time. Uh, and we kind of laugh about it. It's not that they're making bad decisions, but like, as we're getting older and we're doing things, it's like, man, it makes so much sense why they did this when we were growing up, because now we're having to do the same thing.

Yes, that's totally— I've just had that realization in the last, I would say, year and a half or so. I've just been like, wow, like, I look at my mom in just this different light to where I'm like, she's a human. And like, when she had me, she was, you know, like my age now. And so it's just this, it's just like a beautiful evolution to kind of like understand and look back and be able to like look back at the different times in your life and what your parents did or said or how they acted. And then to just kind of like digest it all now as an adult.

Absolutely. And I think it puts, puts a lot of things in context and it, it helps you learn from things that it also helps. Like if there's ever decisions that you were upset with or that you questioned or you just didn't understand why they did the things that they did, it suddenly— sorry, excuse me. Suddenly makes sense and it contextualizes what was going on there. And I really enjoyed the beauty in that just because there's things I'm like, I never understood why my parents did this or warned me of this or tried to protect me from this. And then you experience it and you're like, oh, that's why. Like a good example is I know my parents really wish that I was closer and I wish that they were closer as well. And I know that in some ways it's a selfish thing on their part, which I understand of just wanting their son and kids to be closer. Because there's, there's a lot of good that comes out of being close to your family. And I think some of it is that they, you know, my dad and mom both, both had a time where they were away from, from family. What, you know, my dad was right whenever he turned 18, he had a semi that he was doing long hauls. And I think part of it was he was trying to protect me from the heartache that he felt when he was away from his family. And, and it just kind of all clicks at once, you know.

As you look back, I know we've talked about, or I've mentioned living separate lives. Do you feel that way, or do you feel like your life has always been like remained a constant, or do you feel like there's definitely been shifts to where you had to like pick up and almost start over?

So there definitely— I used to view there being like these different Wills basically of, of, you know, like there's this version of Will and like I'll give you an example. So when I moved to Philly, there was the "Go out and have a great time" Will. And then, shortly after that, there was the triathlete Will. And then, shortly after that, there was the back to having a good time Will. And then, shortly after that, there was the obsessed with weightlifting Will, and then there was powerlifting Will, and then now there's jiu-jitsu Will. And I used to view— because I kind of send them around my hobbies because I need change in my life. If I don't have change in my life, I start to— it starts to bleed out in different ways. So, now that I have a solid awesome wife, a great relationship there, great things going on in my life, where you see the changes in my hobbies. And, the reason I stopped viewing it as separate lives and more looked at as the evolution of me is I read a book and it kind of described about how you can get so caught up in looking at these end goals like the end of your journey is what defines you. And, if you can just get to that end goal, you'll be happy. If you just get to this point, then you'll be happy. And, if you can just lose that extra 10 pounds, then you'd be happy. And, I realized that at the end of every journey that I had was not necessarily happiness. There was this initial happiness because I hit my goal and then there was an emptiness afterwards because now what? And, I always felt like, "Well, I climbed this mountain, where's the next mountain?" And, I think it caused me to dislike older versions of myself. So, I used to have this idea of old Will sucked, new Will is so cool and he's the best and this is my new thing and this is who I am forever. And it's only recently that I've embraced that there's just me and I'm just going through different evolutions and I'm still trying to find out exactly what makes me happy. And maybe that means switching hobbies all the time and maybe it means I'll eventually find the thing that I like to do, but it's helped me kind of embrace my past a little bit because I think that whatever you develop, at least what I did is I developed this unhealthy dislike for an older version of myself, which then any memories I had during that time I would associate as bad. And I think it can be unhealthy in a lot of ways. So, I've tried to embrace that. I just have had many forms and I've had a very incredible weight loss journey and I've done all these different hobbies and they're not necessarily different me or different areas. It's more like it's just me evolving as I grow older and become a little bit more wise.

Yeah, that's really interesting because I just put out a podcast episode yesterday and I was talking about this and I said, if you know me at all, you know that I crave change with like everything in life. I'm literally like purging my closet every 2 weeks. I'm changing the furniture around. I'm doing silks, I'm doing barre. Like I'm just, I just, I love it. And I used to look at it as a bad thing, or I had people be like, oh my gosh, Kris, like you're just so all over the place. But then I was reading something about— because I do, I'm a freelancer, and so I get to work from home, which I absolutely love. And I was joining this freelance group, and one of the terms that they use is a multipotentialite. And they were like, that is totally awesome and cool that you have 28 different passions. That's like, you don't need to look at it as bad. Like, you need to look at it as that you're just interested in a lot of different things and it's totally okay to try them all out and hop from thing to thing to thing and just immerse yourself, you know, like however you want to. And so I like that you said that, that it's just you embrace all of it. And it's not that you're a different person, it's just that you're evolving and you're changing and that's okay.

Yeah, and it kind of helps too, 'cause maybe you'll relate to this is when I jump into a hobby, there's no doing it 50%. Like if I'm going to do it, it's 110%. Like I'm going to research it until there's no end to it. And I'm going to like learn all the terminology and I'm going to get whatever outfit that I need. And I'll know the terms so that like you'll have a conversation with somebody as if you've been doing it for years. I'm like, I have to do that. And I think what I realized is if I don't focus that on hobbies, then that happens everywhere. So it's like, okay, well, This is the new way that I dress now. So, I'm getting rid of all my clothes just like you said and this is my new thing. And, it kind of helps. It's a way to control it, but it also is really fun because I've got to do some really, really neat things. And, I did a triathlon on the Jersey Shore with one of my best friends. And, I mean, having that experience and having a powerlifting competition and my first jiu-jitsu competition is next month. And, it's allowed me to meet so many different people and it's allowed me to experience so many different things. Oh, rock climbing. I forgot that I was rock climbing, Will, for a little bit. So, being able to go outdoors and do that. And it's really given me this plethora of experience that I absolutely love. Just the things that I've got to experience and see and do makes me feel really happy because I feel like when I leave this world, I want to not look back and think that I didn't take advantage of everything that I had given to me and I didn't live the best life that I possibly could, or at least one that made me extremely proud.

Yeah, you've done so much, and it sounds like you're just not afraid of change, and you're not afraid to jump all in, which is also an admirable quality because I think sometimes people hold themselves back because they're scared or they're scared that they might fail. And so that's, I think, another big lesson that I've learned is to just not be scared, just jump all in and that it's a definite that I'm going to fail, but it's okay and it's not a big deal.

Yeah. And actually I have a very different view on why this is, 'cause I've read a lot of books. So I like separate my reading. I read, like physically read fiction books. So like I'm a huge Stephen King fan, things like that, Game of Thrones books. And then I will listen to like your self-help or leadership books. And so, I listened to a ton of books about finding happiness and defining who you are and things like that. And, Gary Vee, I don't like most of the stuff that he puts out just because his personality doesn't jive with mine, but something that he talks about that really does resonate with me is that most things in life are repetition. And, I think that some people, I don't know how you can separate like getting really good at basketball or getting really good at softball has a lot— there's some genetic potential, but on a base level, it has to do with repetition. Repeating an action over and over and over again until it becomes so much a part of you that you do it without thinking and you don't really process it emotionally. It doesn't become this like, "Okay, I'm going to swing at the ball." It's just something that your brain does because you practice it so much. And I think that experiencing failure and being uncomfortable is no different than that, is you have to put yourself in situations. If it's something that you're worried about, being worried about it and not putting yourself into situations where you may fail or may be uncomfortable is going to lead to never being able to deal with that. And the more that you are comfortable and the more that you put yourself in a position where you may fail, the less of an impact it's going to have emotionally on you. And I'm not saying you should want to fail all the time, but you get to a point where you brush it off. So, you know, being able to go do a new sport or try something new isn't overwhelming because you've done it so many times before. It's just like the last time.

What would you say was another, like, really big lesson?

I think the one that I'm still learning that was the most difficult one, but I've at least accepted it. It's just that I'm trying to still work on it. Is accepting that you cannot change the way that everybody thinks. Um, and I mean, I do sales and marketing for a profession and my entire profession is built around changing the way that people think. Um, and you get to a point where you realize that, uh, I think it boils down to like, not everyone's going to like you is a more common way to put it. But, um, there's people that think a certain way and no matter how much that you, uh, want to change the way that they think, it's not going to happen. And that was the first step in the journey for me. The second step was realizing that it was extremely ridiculous for me to think that the way that I thought was correct and that getting people to think that way was also correct. So, I think that the bigger step of that journey is learning that everybody has different viewpoints and approaches things differently because of the way that they were raised or because of experiences that they have in their life. And, unless you were able to relive their entire life, you will never possibly be able to fully understand it. You may be able to empathize at some level, but you'll never understand what really led them to get there. And because of that, you have to understand and accept other people's opinions and, and, uh, learn from them and not just want to change them right away. And, and I think getting through the first step was, was difficult. And the second step is, is, is been what I'm currently working on. Yeah.

I, so I was talking about that book that I'm reading and in, uh, like chapter 2 or 3, he talks about, he kind of talks about this and talks about how As an example, say that you're driving and you— there's somebody in front that's going like 15 miles under the speed limit and your brain, like, you're just like, are you kidding me? Like, I have to get going. Why is he going so slow? This is so annoying. And he says to like, why, why are you the one who like needs to go fast? And why are you the one that needs to like get going? Why, why are you more important than this person in front of you? And so ever since I've read that chapter, I've been trying really hard when I'm dealing with any situation or handling any situation to think, okay, this person, I try to like really put myself in their shoes and think, okay, is this, is this just my point of view that I'm trying to like push onto them? Or is this, you know what I mean? Like you're, it's like just taking their brain and trying to like understand where they're coming from too. And to, not be so selfish in like, I need it. It's— this is the way it should be. This is how it— this is how like this needs to play out. It's just almost like whatever happens, happens. I don't know. It's just— it's a really interesting way of thinking because I think for so long I just was stuck in getting others to do what was best for me instead of like, why should what's best for me be above what's best for the other person. Oh, I 100% agree.

And the other way that I've looked at it too, 'cause I really try to like, I think, and at some level I think that the concept of like balancing energy applies to a lot more things than just, you know, like energy as you think about it. And I think that one of those is that something my wife and I try to work on is trying to inject positive into the world as much as possible and not in like an altruistic sort of way. I mean, like literally like trying to inject positive as much as we can. So saying hi to people and going outta your way to try to put a little bit of positivity out there. 'Cause something I think about is like, if you're stuck behind that car, they're going 50 miles under the speed limit and then you're getting upset and honking them and stuff, which I'm definitely guilty of. So I'm not saying that I practice this to a T, but you never know, like what happens if they just had the best job interview of their entire life and they were thinking about like how different their life is gonna be now that they've got the career that they want and they have the salary that allows them provide for their family. And that you've just ruined that moment because you're upset they're not going to the speed limit. And it's just, it's like something to think about is you never know what a person's going through. And to inject, like some potential negativity in that, it just, I don't, you know, I think that it's, it's, it's a, it's a tough thing to practice all the time. Because I think everybody, you know, we're wired to look out for ourselves. But it's something that's good to think about.

Yes, yes. I like to look at it that way. I like that analogy, inject, like only inject happiness. Out into the world. And then yeah, law of attraction. When you are happy and sending out good happy vibes, then that's what comes back. Let's just touch on one thing before I let you go. So you and I met in what I like to refer to as my first life in Colorado. What are some of your favorite memories of living in Cortez? Oh, there's, there's so much.

Um, yeah, that, that was definitely a very impactful time in my life and I think Something I always laugh about, like one of my, one of my funnier memories is I got to think about whenever we met is there was one time where we were at your house and your mom was cutting our hair. And I'm pretty sure it happened here unless I have memories crossing up. But whenever your mom walked away for a second while my sister was getting her hair cut, she grabbed scissors and cut her bangs all the way to like where her hair grows on the top of her head. And like, I'll never forget that moment because like, I can almost like still picture your backyard because we used to play all the time back there. Yeah, but I just think about like something that stands out to me in Colorado because my life definitely shifted when we moved to Arizona when I was 14, is that that really shaped the way that I look at the world. Like a lot of the experiences that I've had there, both good and bad, you know, because I think we both had our fair share of bullying in different ways. Um, and I think that the time in Colorado that I spent really, uh, shaped the way that I think about life. And something recently that I've been thinking about a lot is, uh, with my, uh, grandpa passing away a couple years ago, um, I've just now started to realize that there's things that I do subconsciously, uh, that are in many ways, uh, connected to the things that he did with me growing up. Um, like for example, I hate sweets. I'm not a sweet person, but I love ice cream. And it was only recently that I connected that my grandpa used to come pick me up all the time to go eat ice cream. You remember the Dairy Queen that was by the Pizza Hut, I think? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So he always took me there and we got Oreo Blizzards 'cause they would turn 'em over, you know, and they would show you that the blizzard doesn't come out. And he would take me there all the time. And to this day, like cookies and cream ice cream is probably my favorite ice cream. And so I think a lot of what happened there shaped who I am, like working, you know, working alongside my family and just taking cues from them really shaped my personality. Personality. So there's a lot of stuff there, you know, that kind of helps develop you.

Yeah, no, I feel the same way. And when I was talking about it and just thinking back to everything, it almost, it makes me a little bit sad because when we lived there, that was when I like, I sang all the time and I was constantly performing and, you know, doing all these different like singing gigs. And when we moved to Arizona, it just, it all shifted and changed and I was no longer really in the music scene as much. And so anytime that I think about Colorado, I think of just such happy memories and having such great friends and just being really like involved. And yeah, it was just such a great, a great little town to grow up in. And I'm so glad that we met and that we still keep in contact. Your family, I love seeing your mom and your sister and all the amazing things that they're involved in, and you and your beautiful wife. It's just been, it's just been a great journey. And to, to see it all and to think that we're going to be 30 next April. And I mean, your birthday's coming up, right? Or did it already pass? Uh, it happened on Saturday, actually. Okay, I was gonna say, I knew we were both April, but I couldn't remember what day. So yeah, it's just—

and yours is— when's yours again? The 27th. The 27th. Okay, yeah, I forgot. We were exactly 2 weeks apart.

Did you notice how I just nonchalantly mentioned that it was my birthday coming up? Because you guys, my birthday is literally my absolute favorite holiday. And yes, it's a holiday. I have celebrated it hard every year, and I always make sure to let my family and loved ones know, and not because I want gifts, but because I really feel like on your birthday you should be celebrated to the max. Not with gifts, but just like compliments like, hey girl, happy birthday, so glad you're with us. Hey girl, you rock, nice job. Nice work, way to stay alive until you're 29, anything, all of it. I, I love it. I love cake and ice cream and the whole birthday shenanigan. So that's my little spiel and my also reminder that you can totally reach out on Saturday if you want. So how awesome was Will? He has become this incredible human with a beautiful life. Which we all aspire to, to do. And I also like that he does it on his own terms, and we, we all should remember that. It's a nice reminder to live life on your terms. Define things how you want to define them, whatever success and happiness mean to you, not what society tells you you should be doing. All right, I will talk at you next week. I hope you have a phenomenal week ahead. Be kind, love each other.