Holistic Self Care

I'm Kristjana Hillberg, ex-Mormon and mom of 3, and this is I Fucking Knew, a show where we break down life's unexplainable moments, the times when you know something's off but you can't put a finger on it, or you're drawn to a path that feels right for you despite others' opinions, and when your gut feeling was just too loud to ignore. Each episode features a guest who shares how their intuition showed up for them, everything from vivid dreams that a partner was cheating to meeting someone and instantly know and being called to just do something else. These are the moments that change our lives forever. Ready to strengthen your intuition?

Tell me about your business, because when I found your website, I was like, yes. I mean, all of it was just so beautiful and so, like, personalized. And curated. I would love to hear like the story behind that.

Thank you. Well, I am the founder and CEO of R&Rae, my first initial and my daughter's name. And when I think of inspiration, she definitely is it. I lost my job November of 2019 as a manager and I took the opportunity to take a chance on myself, to bet on myself rather than waiting for an employer to do it. I had been making my shea butter infused products or skincare for about 5 years. That all started, I had really bad eczema growing up, really bad and just allergies. And I struggled, like I can remember wearing turtlenecks in the summertime because like my, my skin My skin was just so raw. And when my daughter was born and then she was having the same issues, I'm like, I can't, I can't have you do this, the same thing, the same thing again. So when I started to look for all natural products, then the natural products, I couldn't really understand what was, what was that big word on the back of that label? Is it really even needed? You know, what if I, what if I wanted this but not this?. And I either found it to be out of my price range if it was something that was offered, but it was really hard to even find that kind of customization. So then I did as many makers. I go on Pinterest, Google, start looking up what are the natural, you know, stuff that works great for skincare and just eczema and that whole thing. I liked Shea also, you know, it's made in Africa. So also getting to using ancestral products. That we've been using to heal ourselves for eons. So I just figured I'd start from there and yeah. And then, yeah, it's just come to be this thing. But in regards to self-care, I found going out to get your nails done or your hair, or I just need to go out and have some time to myself to go on a walk was, was seen as an extravagance or a a lavishness, especially in our community and for the folks that are really the backbone and carrying community. Those are the people who should be able to, to have that the most. And that is women across the planet. That's wholeheartedly what I believe. So.

I love it. Well, and specifically though, like your boxes are so— each product that you put in the boxes is just like very specific. Specific and intentional. Tell me the story behind each box. Did you have a specific woman in mind? Like, was it, did you almost like create a picture of like the woman that was going to receive this box?

That's a great, really great question. I really think all women deserve it. And that's really what this is about is accessibility. Um, you know, I am really, which is very difficult as a new maker and this being, you know, my, my primary business, but Radical affordability is really important to me, especially the aspect of having the underserved be, being able to access these products and, um, and have something that's good for them. I mean, I definitely think that we are a social impact company and we are social justice oriented. Um, and that really comes from the roots of being a Black woman in America, raised by a Black woman who is an immigrant here from the Caribbean and just the, triumphs that I've had, but the tribulations that I had to go through to get there. I really, I don't want any, anyone else to suffer that way. So one of my core foundational features of this business is also collaboration over competition. So that's where the businesses come in and lifting up other women makers that, you know, are making it in their home, just, just like me, or have just gotten into a few stores or finding those people and just building my own community. Because I also really realized when I started to build a business without real background on, on how to run one, running out of resources. So like, for instance, like capital for one, and then network, you know, who are the gatekeepers? Who do I know? And I really found myself being like, I don't really know anyone. So bringing in another business, leaning in on their networks and community, um, has really helped me thrive and, and grow rather quickly in the past year.

So you partner with other women makers and that's kind of what fills the boxes, right?

Correct. I have my own boxes that I create from all of my products, but then I also have curated boxes where they're all— well, some of them are local, some have been in California or Atlanta. I really would like this to be a global movement ultimately and to have items for all over the world.

That's such a beautiful mission of collaborative women creators coming together. And like you said, it's not about competition, right? It's about like loving, connecting, helping each other. And I love that, that just like letting yourself lean on somebody else to also help you and then giving your resources as well. That's what it— that's what we're here for, is to connect and help each other. Do you also do like special notes or like how do you find all of the women? Do you intentionally reach out to people like people that are completely in alignment with you? Do people find you?

Yes. Well, it's a combination of all of them. I've had really, really amazing people rally around me and lift me up. Hannah Kohlberg is one of them in the Portland area. Also my business advisor. Um, she knows a lot of folks in the community. So a lot of her friends and loved ones are in these boxes. I, I reach out to some folks on Instagram. Some folks reach out to me on Instagram once they, they know that I, you know, I partner with skincare companies that could be very well my direct competitors. But one, I have the mindset that my only real competitor is myself and that we all can eat and ultimately we all eat better once we help everyone be able to be on, on that level. So that's really what that mission is. Yes, there are personal notes. That is really, really important to me that everything that I create or put together is made with the intention. I even make Intentional candles. So you can be able to infuse the candles with, you know, I'm looking for abundance or I'm looking for clarity or my, a lot of my products have a metaphysical piece to it. There's crystals. I give a free gift. I'm just a super giving person. I honestly feel that if you give without looking for something in return, you will always be blessed. Like, and if you start in gratitude, like I, I am so, I'm filled with so much gratitude with everyone that's pulled into this world of mine and we all get to support each other.

Yeah, 100%. I love that. Okay, let's talk about all the products that you make.

So it first started out with my shea-infused products, with skincare products. It's a shea butter is kind of what it is, but once it comes on, it's very much like oil. It, um, It penetrates very quickly. And the popularity of those really came from when I started to add CBD. So then it started to become a real muscle remedy that I've heard. And so, yeah, and it helped me as well with a lot of my back, back injuries and whatnot. And then I make soaps, I make candles, I make bath bombs. My bath bombs are a little different than the ones that you might find particularly on the market. We don't use any alcohols or anything like that. It is very simple ingredients, baking soda, citric acid, and oils or Epsom salts depending on which one. But yeah, so I really try to keep things as pure as possible. I also make body oils as well. The one that right now is My dear love, and also a favorite product is the I Matter Self-Love Oil. And so what this is is really a way of infusing with your own intention for yourself. It's an adornment oil. There's gold leaf, actual real 24K gold leaf in there, and lavender buds and rose petals and a small piece of rose quartz at the bottom floating around in there. So yeah, just a super special— I want folks, when they put this on, you know you are it. It even says on the side, you know, we believe that you are beautiful, talented, and you matter. And that's the goal of all of this.

It's your intuition speaking. Just kidding, it's me, Kris. If you've been yearning for more but aren't sure where to start, your life doesn't look like your own, and you're ready to make changes that lead to a reality that feels like you, I encourage you to apply for a 15-minute call with me where we talk about your goals and the next steps that feel completely aligned with you. Click the link in the description of this episode to apply.

Well, yeah, and I think that, that message can't be said enough. I think that it's something that we need to hear over and over and over again. So I love that, that every time that you, you know, squeeze it into your hands or whatever, put in your hands, you can feel that. And just knowing like where it came from is, I think, so special about actually being able to put like a voice or a face to the product. And like, it's almost like a connection, right? Makes it extra special. So I love that. As far as people that you're partnering with or people that can partner with you, can it be like— I'm only saying this because I do PR for clients. And so, and I am starting like a membership collab partner group. There's so many people, like so many women with like incredible things and they just don't know where to find other people. They don't know who to connect with. They don't know like how to pitch it. And so really I want to provide like just this whole network group of creatives, people who are just all about that same message. Who are the people that you're trying to connect with?

Yeah, absolutely. It is everyone. Specifically, it is, you know, we focus more towards, or we find women products, but it's really inclusive. I just think that ultimately I want to make sure that my social giving is giving to the folks that I feel need it the most. And ultimately, I feel that if we empower women and we give them leadership roles, we can heal the planet. But until we do that, yeah, it's just putting Band-Aids on there. So this is my way of doing my part and being really a self, self-care, self-support system. And so anyone to answer your question. But yeah.

That's great. As far as building this business, because you've been building it now for over a year during COVID during so many things happening in this world. What were some of the— because there's hardships, I know— but what were some of like your triumphs where you felt like, yes, I've got this, or I'm empowered, or you just really felt fully just there and just, you know what I mean? I'm like, I— people see this, but just like, yes.

Yeah, I feel there's been quite a few times that's happened for me. I think the very first thing is I got really clear on my vision and that was a triumph enough. You know, I really felt just like Einstein said, like a fish trying to climb a tree. Every job I did, I just, I would, I would do them well enough, but just still didn't feel whole in it. Um, and it is a very scary thing owning your own business and creating all of the products and doing all the things that you're talking about, marketing, PR, building network, all of those things. But once I got clear, and I started to tell people about it and then they started to say, how can I help? Or like, hey, I may not know this resource, but let me introduce you to this person. Or that's the thing. When I started to see people really open up and share their resources or would share it to other people, that was huge. Every time I do something like this, I, you know, it is a triumph for me. I'm fully confident and know front to back my business and where I want to see it. But there is this, especially with what's going on in the world and the climate, putting myself out there and, and unashamedly doing it. Yeah, it was, it was a lot for me to overcome and to have the strength to not just hide behind a brand, but actually let people know who I am. So that was a major triumph.

That's incredible. And my platform really is we all have a story and we all have a story that needs to be told. And so that's why I started this podcast in the first place, is I'm like, so many times I think we either forget like how incredible we really are. I've had so many people just be like, "Eh, my story is like whatever." And to me, I mean, just sitting here and listening to your story, I'm just so moved and thinking that at some point you may have not thought that yourself. Or maybe like not shared it enough. And so I love that. And I think that through telling our stories, it just helps us come back to ourselves. Sometimes when we're telling our stories, we don't even know we felt a certain way until we're sharing it. And then it comes up and we're like, oh, I don't even know I felt that way. It's almost like finding another version of yourself, which I'm sure you've experienced in growing and building this business. Like I came kind of like you. I just would do a job, do a job, and like, yeah, I could do it, but it didn't feel like truly me. It didn't feel like I was doing work that mattered. It was just work. And I think now that I'm actually spending my time with people that are making change and actually like caring for humanity, it truly is like giving me a feeling that I could have never found in another job. And so I'm sure that you now, like working with other women, creating these beautiful boxes, drawing inspiration from your beautiful daughter, like that probably means way more to you than like anything else that you've ever done.

Yeah, absolutely. And it's also lended to me some bigger dreams happening that I didn't even think I could be able to accomplish. I've always wanted to get back to the land, but never thought that I could ever be able to afford it. You know, I'm in my late 30s and I'm, you know, I'm running a business that's been a year in, but I have a 5-year-old that I want her to have a place where she can— actually, that might be her in the background— that I could be able to have her have a place where she can go run and be safe. And so this has lended the opportunity for me to have my, my first year of growing. So it has also grown my business as well.

Oh my gosh. So for you, like your dreams and goals for this business, obviously you said that you want it to, the box to be full of just things from all over the world for women. What do you think, like what is something this year that you are really working on or really working towards with the box, with the business?

So there's multifacets with this business because I do feel that ultimately it is a self-care system. And in order for us to have an equal playing field, um, we need to hit up housing, food, and also self-care and also that spiritual aspect as well. So that is ultimately what I try to encompass in this business. Um, so in regards to what I am really passionate in working on right now is a vertical grow system that people can have in their homes, and so I can— so that people can have autonomy over their food. As we've seen during this pandemic time, folks standing in lines at— to get into a food pantry, and the fact is, is that we really, with the time, could grow our own, or at least supplement that. In regards to the boxes, I would like to see this be a a worldwide movement where, you know, not just with me, but other women meeting each other. That's what happens as well. Or people get found just by being in the box or, and being in someone else's box. That's what I would really love to see. Just the growth in that more folks, I'd like to get more media attention, just getting more people knowing what this is all about.

Yeah, 100%. Who else has started something like this? Who else could like weigh in on what that feels like or, you know, what I'm going through?

I honestly wholeheartedly believe that is the way to save small business is by us collaborating together and letting other people, using our networks and our platforms to be able to share other folks' products. I actually, as I'm saying that right now, I'm looking around to see, cause I like, I have, these, just these amazing makers that I have privilege to be able to work with. Pretty phenomenal.

Okay, so I just decided that when this episode goes live, I'll just do a giveaway. So they can reach out to you and then you just tell me whichever box they want and I'll just pay for it and you just let me know. I'm like, because everybody needs one of these boxes. You'll probably get multiple requests from me, but, um, Let's take— I don't know when I'm gonna put this up. Of course, I'm just so glad that you like, wow, and came on because seriously, when I went to your site and I mean there's a lot of different like subscription boxes, self-care boxes, but honestly like when I went to your page there was just something different, like something about the descriptions, the products that I felt way more drawn to than I've ever felt to another. I haven't really ever, I guess, bought a box for myself, but I was like, oh, everyone I know needs one of these. So yes, I was so happy that I, that you found me, or I found you. But we should take—

That means so much. It really does. It means so much because I've really struggled. I've had really long talks with my mentors and my business advisors about It's scary putting yourself out there right now. Um, you know, I've had folks leave comments or, you know, been really scared for my safety and putting myself out there, um, and showing my face because I could hide behind a brand. But, um, so it's really, really nice to hear folks be like, I put my heart into this.

So, oh, I could feel that. Like, I could feel your heart energy like radiating on the website. I'm like, you know, because I wrote you and I was like, yes, I want— like, these are incredible. So I know, like, through all of the hurt and the mean and the awfulness that's happening, like, you are so needed in this space, like, so, so needed and loved. And I cannot wait for somebody to get one of your boxes.

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