10 Relationship Truths Every Woman NEEDS to Hear

So many people look to relationships to fill in broken pieces or things in themselves that are missing, and that almost always leads you to relationship failure. So it's really important to have a full, complete sense of who you are before you start looking to partners.

Welcome to the Love Strategies podcast where we help successful women attract high value men, date with a strategy, and improve their relationships. Now, whether you're single or dating or in a new relationship, we, we're here to help you dive into the male mind and provide raw insights found nowhere else, backed by science, psychology, and our own personal experiences. Your hosts today are myself, Adam Lodolce, professional dating coach and founder of love strategies, and Dr. Gary Lewandowski, relationship scientist, professor, and our head relationship coach here at Love Strategies. Please share with a friend and enjoy. All right, so today's podcast is a very personal one for Gary, and we always have podcast notes before these. Sometimes I read them ahead of time, sometimes I don't. Today I did not. I was going to start this one off by saying, and this is the 10 relationship truths every woman needs to hear, but it's really kind of a letter to his daughter. I was going to start this one out saying, gary's definitely crying on this podcast, but I started reading this and I'm starting to get teary over here, so maybe I'm the SAP. This is, this is really good stuff, Gary. And I don't know, this is kind of your podcast today, so I want, I want you to kind of lead this a little bit. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Yeah, I hadn't started yet.

Me too. I, I, I don't know. Like, we talked about this a little bit on the podcast before. I'm going to set, I'll do my best to set this up in a, in a way that doesn't make me cry because the thing in my, I'm a crier about things, but the thing that most reliably makes me cry is anything having to do with my daughter. Like, there's, I don't know, like, my daughter and I have a really special relationship. Like, we're tight, we do a lot of things together. Like me being a dad is literally the most important thing to me in my, in my life. And so this summer she turned 16, and also this summer she really started, for the first time, she started dating, which is like the gray hairs coming in. You see them, um, it's, it's happening. So it's interesting, it's an interesting spot to be in because, you know, she's dating and Starting to like, enter that world of relationships. And it's like literally what I do. And so I, I wrote her, I'm trying. I, I do this a lot on her birthday. Like, I'll, like, I'll give her something special. Yeah, yeah, I'll give her something special and like heartfelt and something that she's like a written out card or something like that. But this time I wrote her a letter because, like, no daughter wants to sit and have her dad, like, give her a, like, here, here, Avery, here's a bunch of advice for you. Like, you got to do this, this. So I'm like, how can I get her to like, hear some of this stuff without me, like, giving her. And so I just wrote her a letter. Here's the huge bonus. So for her birthday, we took her and her friends to Cape May for a beach weekend. And so when she opened this letter, she read it in front of all of her friends. And so not only did she get to hear all this advice, all of her friends got to hear this advice, which is huge. Huge, huge. It was like just a happy accident, right? But it's like now all of her friends are working from the same information and have heard the same thing. So like, who's she going to turn to for advice and relationship stuff? She doesn't go to me or my wife. Like, she's going to talk to her friends. And now they all have kind of the same basis of information which just, just, it, it was, is just worked out really, really well. And so this actually became, after I did this, my wife's like, oh my gosh, like, other people have to hear this. Like, this is so good. And so then I, I printed it. I read an article for a column for Psych Today, so I printed it up there. Now I've had lots of articles and I've had articles that have had over a million views, but this article with this group, this set of advice that I'm about to share, I've never received more personal notes, more just emails and people reaching out to me and like direct messaging just like to kind of like, thanks for putting this together. I. Sharing this with my daughter. I'm sharing this with every girl I know. Like, it's just the feedback I've gotten from this has just been overwhelming. And so I'm just really glad to see that something I wrote just from, from my kid has been able to help other people. And so I'm, I'm really jealous, jazzed about the idea of being able to do this on the podcast, because, you know, getting this information out to more people is super important. And, I mean, one of the reasons why I thought to do this in the first place is. And I'm sure, Adam, you've heard this too, on our. Our client sessions, is the number of times when you are talking to women about relationships and you're talking about different strategies and ways to think about it, and probably the. The feedback you hear more often than anything else is women saying something to the effect of, man, I wish I knew this earlier.

I wish I knew this sooner. Yeah, I wish I knew this when I was teenager. I wish I knew this before I married that guy in my 20s and then stayed with him for 20 years. God, I wish I knew this sooner. So 100.

It's like, you hear what our clients. Every time I teach a relationships course in college, like, the students will say, man, I wish I would have had this when I was a teenager. Right. And so, like, that was kind of like. Like, I could just give my daughter a bunch of this stuff now and maybe hopefully help her going off into the future. And so that. That's kind of where this came from. And so, you know, this was really, like, 10 lessons for my teenage daughter. But because of the feedback I got, it was like, it's really not 10 lessons for just a teenage. It's really 10 lessons for everybody. Like, you know, and then it's directed towards women. Because I have a daughter. If I had a son, I could have called it 10 lessons for my son. I mean, they all pretty much apply to anybody. But a lot of good stuff in here. I hopefully. Hopefully this benefits a lot of people. So you want to. You want to jump in? You want me to just kind of start rolling through them?

Yeah, why don't you go. You got to read them. I mean, this is your. Your writing. I'm happy to comment on them.

So, you know, here. This is the exact list. So we'll just take on. Take them one by one, maybe chat about them a little bit, and then just kind of go to the next one. So the first one, I started with this one intentionally because it's where most relationships kind of start, is with, like, physical attraction. And so this is what I wrote. You're beautiful, but don't let people fall in love with you for your looks. Prioritizing superficial qualities leads to superficial relationships. This goes for you, too. Don't get distracted by physical qualities. Looks are temporary. Character is forever.

Yeah.

And so, you know, it's like, how often do we particularly grow in A relationship, let that relationship develop or not based on, you know, how cute a guy is or how attractive a woman is. And you know, it's, it's important for women, especially because guys are so visual, to not let guys fall in love with you. Just be based on your appearance because that doesn't lead to long term happy relationships. And women, you know, don't date guys just because they're six foot two.

Right, right.

They have great abs, they have great hair or whatever, you know, whatever it is like those things, those are, those are temporary. Character is forever. And so.

Well, and we know from the data and the research that two attractive people in a relationship are not going to have a better relationship than, let's just say two physically unattractive people in a relationship. There's no correlation there between attractiveness and longevity of the relationship and happiness. It actually might be an.

Isn't it?

It's a negative correlation.

A slight negative. Yeah.

So when we're dating in a way where we're just focusing on that, the physical attributes and I get it, I mean, you want to be with someone you're attracted to and you feel that instant chemistry with and you're just drawn to that human being. But if it's only based on that, the relationship is doomed to fail. Because like you said, character is what matters most. I think characters, as I'm getting older, that's what I look for the most in anyone I spend time with, whether it's family, friends, co workers, characters, what really matters. So no, I love that.

Yeah, because you're looking long term. I mean, that's the stuff that, that matters. So the second one is you have to be the right person to find the right person. Before you focus on what you want in a romantic partner, focus on your own development. Relationship success isn't about finding any partner. It's about finding the right partner for you. Know who you are, love who you are, and be confident in who you are. She's pretty amazing. And that's just, you know, we both. My synergies section of our program and your little love steps, it's like we both start in the same spot, which is, you know, you gotta focus on yourself. And so, so many people look to relationships to fill in broken pieces or things in themselves that are missing. And that almost always leads you to relationship failure. So it's really important to have a full, complete sense of who you are before you start looking to partners.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, how many people will join Love Accelerator or want to work with us and they're like, just tell me the magical places where to meet a guy and that's all I need to know. If I just knew those places, everything would be easy. And like, okay, like we can help you with that. But we all know first, like month of working with someone, we don't talk about that at all. And we don't give them that because we know that our love life is merely a reflection of it's. It's merely a mirror reflection of what's going on in our own life. And so we need to start focusing on our own life and building ourselves up. Not only our confidence, but also just our character qualities. Our traits are the way we show up for people looking at our relation, our non romantic relationships and you know, our romantic relationships are purely going to be a reflection of what our platonic relationships are like. If all your platonic relationships are a nightmare and they're full of drama and chaos, guess what? You're, you know, your romantic relationships are like. So focusing on that first before trying to get out there and meet the right person is ultimately what's going to set you up for incredible success. So I think that's great advice, especially for someone who's in their teens or at any stage in life, but especially when someone's younger, because so much of the advice out there is focused on meeting the other person, on attracting other people, on what to say, what to do, how to respond. No, just focus on yourself first.

Yeah, because, you know, particularly at this stage of life, you know, teens, and it could be really any, any time period. But it's like if you're not sure about who you are, it makes everything a lot more difficult and, you know, you can. You know, I like that you bring up that idea of like, you know, where can I meet people? Because you could walk into a room full with all the perfect partners, but if you're not a full, complete person, you. You may not even be able to recognize that they're the right person for you because you're not full yourself. Right. And so you have to be the right person to find the right person. It's super, super important.

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All right, so the third one was chasing perfection is a trap. Don't be too hard on yourself or others. Focus on progress, not perfection. When finding a romantic partner, you can have anything but it's almost impossible to get everything. Prioritize what's important. Huge. Huge. And it's like my daughter gets this from me and it's terrible but it's like I'm a perfectionist and she is too. And so like lots of people are and lots of people are in like relationships because we all want the perfect partner. But it's like if you constantly demand perfection, you're always going to be miserable because it just doesn't. Doesn't exist.

Yeah. Yep. I don't know if you've noticed this trend in Love Accelerator is our, our core coaching program for those who are just kind of tuning into what we do. We have this, I have this process called the seven little love steps and seven small steps to go from struggling your love life to attracting long lasting love. And we have this little love step called little love step number two where you create your love vision. And it's where we really help you get crystal clear about the man, the relationship you really want and deserve and that'll set you up for long term success. And the trend that I've noticed on a little bit lately, I'm going to address this with the community is I hear people come on and be like, oh, I created my love vision. I have my list and you know, I have about 20, 25 things on it. I know what I want but I can't find it. And I'm like, oh, you haven't actually gone through, you haven't gone through those modules then clearly. Because creating a love vision is not about having a list of a hundred or 25 things that you're looking for in a person. It's actually about creating priorities and minimizing that list. And so figuring out what are those core priorities, what are those absolute needs, understanding what is most important for a long lasting relationship and then anything that falls outside of that, you're going to stay open minded to. So it's like it's actually the opposite of creating a list. Like you do create a list as part of the process, but it's not about having this long list of like he must like to read novels about cow cowboys. I don't know why would anyone do? But you know what I mean? Like he must love to crochet he must love to do this. It's like, no, it's not about that. It's about focusing our needs. And I think that kind of relates to what you're saying here, which is, you know, chasing perfection. It's a trap. You're never going to get everything that you want in a human being, so you really got to prioritize what is going to actually make you happy in the long term.

Yeah. And it's just, it comes. It starts from this recognition. And like we say all the time, everything starts with you is like, you just got to realize, like, you're not perfect. And that's okay because, like, that's not the goal. Progress is the goal. It's like, perfection isn't a it. It's a journey. Right. It's like, I'm not perfect, but I'm trying every day to become a better and better person. And, like, that's what you want. That's a fulfilling life. I mean, that. That's just how it works. And so, you know, you just have to prioritize things accordingly. And I. Everything you just said, I wholeheartedly agree. You can't have a checklist relationship. Like, that's not how you find partners. Like, that's not the way to go.

About it or checklist for yourself. You know, you. You just. Yeah, like, like you said, it's. Is she kind of a type a person?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She's got that in her. So, yeah, I feel, I feel your pain. I'm with you. I'm with her.

And then, you know, it's. It's. But it's, you know, it's particularly if you like, any. Anybody listening, if you think back to, like, when you were a teenager, it's like, everybody has this idea of, like, what it means to be, like, the person you want to be. And it's. It's this weird vision, and it's something really hard to get down to. And so you just have to calibrate accordingly. Right. So the fourth one is every relationship problem has the same initial solution, communication. It's the best way to keep small problems small and solvable. And so this is something we've talked about a lot in the podcast, and I don't need to go into too much, but it's like, instead of wondering, ask.

Yeah, right.

Like, if you're. You're talking to somebody and you're not sure how they're feeling, like, ask. Like, just instead of trying to, like, conjure up what's actually going on, if there's Something that's bothering you, talk about it. Because keeping, you know, burying those problems, you know, you'll, you'll do it for short term harmony, but it learn it leads to long term problems.

And so, you know, well, like how many times on masterminds are we talking to a client who's in a relationship and she's like, well, I can kind of feel that there's something wrong. Really off. And you're just like, have you talked to him about it? Right, no. What do I do? Talk to him about it.

And, and what you find, what they find like nine times out of ten is it has nothing to do with them or the relationship. It's like their mom's sick, they got a fight with somebody at work, or, you know, who knows what's going. Like it's a million things, something else. All right, so number five, never hide, minimize, or otherwise sacrifice your personality and identity. Anyone who truly cares for you will authentically love you for who you are and not try to change you. Don't trade who you are for someone to be with.

Yeah.

And it's like if there's a mistake that you see more people make, like this is one of the biggest ones is like they think like, love requires this like, sacrificing of self. It's like, it's this overly romanticized idea. It's like, I'm gonna compromise things about myself to make my. Make this relationship work. It's like, that's not the way, just not the way to do it.

Yeah. I think that there's no greater hell than being with someone who's constantly nitpicking you and trying to change who you are every step of the way. Like that just sounds like I, I've actually never been in that or. Because I've never stayed in those relationships for longer than like a week. But I know people who are in that. It's like everything they say is a problem, everything they do is a problem. And that to me just sounds like truly my definition of hell.

Yeah. It's like, don't do it to other people and don't let anybody do it to you. Right. It's like the whole point of like long term relationships is like, I like you for who you are, flaws and all. You like me for who I am, flaws and all.

Right.

It's like we're still working to get better, but we still like each other. This next one relates very much to this. So this is number six. Don't expect someone to be right for you once they change the fact is people don't change much. What you see is generally what you get. Don't think I can change them. You want a partner who is your equal, not a fixer upper project. And that, that's one, you know, like, this is for my daughter. But I think this is one especially geared towards women. I mean, I think women generally have more of a, I can fix them, I can mold them, I can shape them, I can, you know, make them into the man I want them to be. And kind of like that idea of like this reclamation project to kind of turn this guy into the perfect vision of what they want.

Yeah, well, it's kind of like that motherly instinct that comes in, I feel like. And it's like you have this person in your life that you want to help and you want to guide and you want to change them and you want to point them in a new direction. But if you're with a man who's just not stepping up to the plate, maybe he's being non communicative, maybe he's pulling away, maybe he's hot and he's cold, maybe he doesn't treat you well, he's not going to change. So it's, you have one of two options. Either accept or move on. Change is not a strategy. And you just see it time over time over time where you're like, are you surprised? I even see that in my personal life with certain friends where they're like dating someone and they're like, oh, I can't believe she did this. I'm like, I can. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not surprised at all that she did that. I'm not surprised that she cheated on him. Not surprised a bit. She hasn't changed. What are you talking about? Or vice versa. I mean, and for whatever reason, when we're in a relationship, we think that somehow we can mold someone into our, our ideal partner, but it just doesn't happen. Just doesn't happen.

And it's not fair. Right? It's like, you know, you might think, oh, I'm gonna help them. But it's like if someone basically, it's basically what you're saying to, to that person is, I'll love you if. Yeah, and it's conditional. And if someone did that to you, it would feel pretty crappy, like, I would love you if you change X, Y and Z about you. It's like, wait, what is what? You're supposed to love me for who I am. And it's like you have to Realize that you're doing it right. And it's not something that people always realize because like you said, it's come. It's very well intentioned, it comes from a good place. But you can't have one person pulling all the weight in a relationship. Like, it's got to be equal. Right? So number seven. Seven is don't use how someone feels about you to decide how you feel about them. When a person likes you, it feels good, but it isn't impressive or unique. It's expected. You're awesome. They're not the first person to like you and they won't be the last. Instead of wondering, do they like me? Ask yourself, are they good for me? And so it's very easy to, like we. Everybody likes attention, right? And so if someone's giving you positive attention, it's easy to be like, oh, I like that. That must mean I like him. Right? Yeah, you're gonna realize, like, it's not that special because some of that attention you're getting isn't genuine or authentic.

Right? Well, I mean, I think that's why, I mean, the earliest YouTube videos we ever came out with would be like, 10 sign, 10 signs he likes you. Those would get millions of views every single time we release a video like that. 10 weird signs, he likes you. 10 subtle signs. He 10 because you just are like, oh, that's nice. Yeah. He is doing that thing with his eyes or he does hug me for two seconds longer. That subtle sign that he likes you, or he is cracking jokes or he is just talking to me. Whatever. All these examples, it feels good, but none of it comes to the question of like, is this good or bad?

Right?

Right. So what if he likes you? If he's a jerk, who cares if he. Yeah, please.

I was just gonna say, like, we all. It's like a deep, fundamental human yearning for to be seen accepted and to be heard and to be accepted. And so we're very sensitive to any form of attention in that way. And so you just have to make sure you're not overdoing it because it's you people are gonna like you. Like, that's just how it's going to work. And it never feel. Sometimes it doesn't feel like that, but it will happen. But like, are they good for you? That's what really matters. Because that's the long term piece. Right.

And so also, people are not gonna like you.

Okay.

That's just the opposite, which is, guess what? A lot of people aren't gonna like you. And don't Use that as just. Because now, if he doesn't like you, don't start liking him because he doesn't like you. Which is. I know that's another piece of advice. But this whole idea of seeking to understand if someone likes you or not is a trap in itself that we all can fall into. It's like a game. I used to play that game all of the time. I would never ask myself, are they good for me. I would just be like, does she like me? Does she not like me? And depending on the answer to that, oh, I'm gonna. I'm gonna fight. I'm gonna fight for her to like me. I don't care as much as I can. And it's just. It sets you up for truly a life of misery if you're. Because the only way to feel good is when you get that validation from another person.

Yeah.

And it's not worth it.

And you end up twisting yourself into all these kind of contortions to get everybody to like you. And it's like, you know, if you're this person for everybody, like, who are you to yourself that you kind of lose your center. You lose who you really are, trying to get everybody to like you. And it's like, if some people don't like you and they don't like you for the right reasons, Mission accomplished.

Done.

Right. That's perfect. Great. You don't. You don't like me because I have a sense of humor. Okay. Yeah, that's fine. I mean, that's just. That's, you know, that's a more healthy way to look at things, and that's.

Something that is especially. I know most of our audience is. Is much older, but when you're younger, that is such important advice, because you just care so much about what other people think. It's. Yeah. Once you turn. For me, honestly, once I turn 30. Right. I legitimately kind of stopped caring about what people thought of me. Like, in my 20s, I would tell myself I didn't care. I really cared. It was weird. Like, I swear, once I hit 30, maybe it was when I met Jess or whatever, just something clicked to me. And now I'm getting to the point where I'm like, I should start caring a little bit about what people think, because I care so little that I'm like, have to remind myself, no, you should care a little bit about what people think about you. You know.

I can just imagine you walking around Boston streets and white Crocs and black Soc pulled up to your knees like, I don't give a. Oh, my God.

No, I wasn't in Croc. I was in, like, highlighter pants with, like, dark, black dyed hair and, like, a ear piercing. I thought it was really cool. And I'm like, I don't care what people think of me. And then if someone doesn't look at me the right way, I'm like, why don't they like me? You know, why doesn't she like me? Why did she reject me?

You know, it's so funny because you really do go for that. Like, I want everybody to like me. And then you go through that. Like. Like you said in your 20s, it's like, I don't care what people think, but you secretly really, really do care. And then, like, you do 30s, 40s, is like, you legitimately stop caring so much. Right?

Yeah. Like, my dad's age, where she's 80, and he's just like, I don't give a. Like, Yep. Who cares? I. If I. If I'm talking to someone I don't like, I just, like, leave that conversation. Like, it's just like, life is short.

So I think it's on.

Yeah. Yeah. So.

So speaking of time, like, I don't draw this out forever, but, like, so number eight in. In this list is relationships require sacrifices. However, those sacrifices should be mutual and minor. The right person won't require you to give up too much, and you won't need to ask too much from them. And so, like, you talk about romanticized ideas about relationships, they often go too far. Sacrifice is one of them. It's like, you're gonna have to make sacrifices in a relationship, but they. They need to be mutual and minor. Both people have to be doing it, and they shouldn't be on anything big. Too often people are like, I'm gonna give up my career to go follow this person because they want to be in a band. No. Right. Like, the amount of times that that stuff works out is very, very small. And so you have to make sure that you're not making big sacks. And your partner, for that matter, is not going to ask you to change fundamentally who you are, because they love who you are. And so you shouldn't have to even worry about some of these things.

Yeah. There's something so romantic about sacrifice that's just like, oh, my gosh, she sacrificed everything for him. And that's so beautiful. It's like. Is it.

Yeah, it's a real problem, actually. Like, it's one of those things that, like, controlling, emotionally abusive partners, they start, you know, making you make all these kinds of sacrifice, like you can't see your friends anymore, you can't go out anymore, you, you can't do anything you like to do. You have to do everything for them. And it's like it happens little by little so you don't even notice it. But it's like those sacri. You have to pay, pay close attention to those sacrifices and don't over romanticize it.

Yeah, well said for sure.

So number nine, the best partner. Support your aspirations and your continual development. Find someone who will push you out of your comfort zone and nurture all the ways you want to grow. And so, you know, as you know, like one of the probably the main thing that we do more than anything in this program is women empowerment. So I think what we do is much more about empowerment even than finding relationships. And so growth is. And nurturing that growth is empowerment. And so you want to make sure your partner is nurturing the growth you want, you want to happen. That's the important part is it's got to be what you want and they support it and vice versa because that's the nature. You know, we talk about synergy and we talk about, you know, what we want our relationships to be. The best relationships help you grow and change in the ways you want to grow and change. And you do the same for your partner and so you make that the bedrock and you're going to have a lot of happiness.

And I mean, a counterexample to this would be, let's say you are successful female, you have a lot going for you. Start dating a guy who starts telling you, you know what, you don't really need to do much with your life. You don't really need to move up in the ladder. You don't need to focus on your health, whatever, in subtle ways and kind of starts chopping you down because he is not on your level. So he's going to just chop, chop, chop, chop. That would be a counterpoint to this. Instead you want to be with someone who just kind of support your aspirations, supports your development. He. You do the same for him. And that's why synergy is all like one plus one equals three or four or five. When you're with someone, two different people working together and kind of building each other up. The. Some, some of each part is so much greater than the whole.

Yeah, I mean, you don't want to be with somebody who's going to undermine your success or feels threatened by your success. Like you want someone who's really going to champion your growth. As well as their own. And if you're both growing individually, you're both going to grow together. And that's really, I mean you want to talk about relationships are all about. It's really that me grow, you grow, we grow together. Like, I mean that's synergy, you know, defined. I mean that's exactly what we're shooting for, for amen. And so the last One of these 10, 10 truths, and I ended with this one on purpose because in some ways, like, you know, what we know about lists is like the beginning and the end are what people really remember it. So this last one I purposely saved for the end as like a grand finale almost. And it's long term relationship happiness relies on compatibility. Your romantic partner should be your best friend. They should be understanding, easy to talk to, caring, supportive, fun, respectful and kind. Don't accept anything less. And I think this is one of those things that when you hear it it's like of course. But it's like how many people do we see and do we know personally in our lives who like are with people who they don't particularly like? Yeah, they just tolerate. And it's like their relationship is based on a bunch of things that's not about caring, support, fun, easy to talk to, understanding and kind. Like, you know, women, think about your best friend. Think about all the things that make your best friend the most wonderful person that you know. Like that's what you want, those qualities in a romantic partner.

Yeah, yeah, I remember. So my mother's a divorce attorney and for gosh, over 40 years now and master wants like what's the main reason people get divorced? And she just says people stop liking each other. They just stop or they'd never liked each other, they just don't like each other. You just see it like they just. And you can go further than that. They despise that other person. They just, they're not friends anymore. They don't respect that person. And you gotta, that does require some work from time to time, you know, reconnecting and wanting like, just like any friendship really does. You can't just rely on it always being there. You gotta nurture it, you gotta build it and you know, just spend time with each other. Quality time. So I love it.

Yeah. And so, you know, I, I had the, the 10 things. And so you know, this, this was an actual letter to my daughter. And so I'll just, I'll read the rest and try my best not to cry. But so what I wrote to her at the end was I Hope these ideas give you something to think about and that you'll return to them as often as needed to remind you of what's important for a fulfillment, fulfilling relationship. But most importantly of all, always remember that no matter what, you'll always be my superstar. Love always. That. And so, you know, it's. Thank you for, for giving me the opportunity to talk about this on the podcast and to share this, because I really do, I do think this kind of stuff's important. And whether, like, anybody listening, if you, if you like the list or don't like the list, have this conversation with your teenage daughter. Share some wisdom. Share. Share relationship wisdom that's based on, like, good information and maybe not just the stuff you've seen in other people's relationships, because some of that stuff isn't always right. Really, you know, the other nice thing, I'll say, you know, I gave this to her about a month ago, and just last night we had a conversation about, you know, some dating thing that she, she's going through about, you know, a guy and, like, whether he's texting and what it means and all. And we, like, came back to a lot of these things. And it's like we now have this common. I don't like vocabulary almost about what goes into a good relationship. And she's, she's making really good decisions so far. And, you know, we're talking about it, which. And that's. And that's really what you want.

Yeah. Having core set of principles to always live by, I think in anything you do. But certainly relationships, it just brings you back to ground zero because you could be like, well, he texted me this. Should I do that? It's like, go back to the list. Does it fall into line with number seven? Does it fall in line with number three? And so, yeah, I hope everyone got a lot out of this. I would recommend sharing this with anyone who's younger, who needs to hear this, or anyone who's in their 50s, 60s, 70s, or 80s who's never heard this, because I'm sure they're going to get a lot out of it. So, Gary, that was really special. Thank you for sharing that. I hope everyone got a lot out of it.

Thanks, Adam.

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