075 - Thought Life

Welcome to the Pure Desire podcast where we partner with you to bring hope and freedom on your journey to purity. Hey there. I'm your host, Trevor Windsor, and we're so thankful you're taking time out of your day to hang out with us. I'm here with my co host as always, Nick Stumbo.

Oh, I slept great. I got a full 40 minutes.

Christmas season is here. Elf. That's one of the greatest, greatest Christmas movies of all time. Honestly, my favorite of all time.

It's one that we watch their kids every year and truth be told, the end always makes me cry. So I know Elf's not thought of as a deeply sentimental movie, but. No, there's something about the father connection at the end and he starts singing and it's Christmas and oh, it's good stuff.

So this is my. I'm a huge Will Ferrell fan, but this is where maybe some people would agree with me. The cleaner a Will Ferrell movie is the funnier. I think it is where I think where he gets a little off base and gets a little wild and raunchy. That gets overwhelming very quickly. But that's why I love Elf. There's just a purity to it that is just brilliant.

Yeah, he, I don't know if you ever heard the backstory on it, but he almost didn't take that role because he thought it would be a terrible movie. But he embraced it and man, that movie has made millions.

So much money. If I had to pay for it, I would every year. So look, as you can probably already tell, you are in for another treat, listener. Today we don't have a guest. It is just us, me and people.

Wish there was a guest maybe.

Well, it's okay. We're not going to spend the next 25 to 35 minutes talking about ELF, though we probably could. Today we are going to be spending time talking about some tips and some tactics regarding thought life. We find that the thought life of someone in recovery from sexual addiction is usually the most difficult battlefield and is usually the last thing, like the last straw as it will the last rung of the ladder. So we'll be giving some different practices today that can help when actively working on purity in our thought life. And so we're gonna teach some of these that we talk about pretty often at our events and our conferences. So we're excited to share some of that with you today.

Yeah, we do talk about this at the conference and usually we bring this up in the men's only Q and A time. So for some of the Women that have been at these conferences and have wondered what we talk about. This is one of those that we share that we go and a little deeper and answer follow up questions with guys. But I think for everyone, the thought life is that part of us that it's just so deeply ingrained. And most of these things happen before we're even consciously aware that it's happening. And it can feel like, well, do these things even change? What do I do about it? But I really think when we practice some of these things routinely, we find that our natural thought process can begin to shift and become a real significant foundation for our long term freedom.

Definitely. Okay, well, let's jump into the first one and we are gonna have five with a couple of things here at the end. So we'll start with the first one. The first one is pick a different image. What do we mean by that?

Yeah, I think this concept comes from a recognition that when we're battling the thought life, we need to have a moment of realization that I'm not actually battling what I'm seeing. I'm battling what my brain is telling me that I'm seeing based on my, my arousal template, the things that trigger me, the things that uniquely, you know, start up that engine in my life. It's not actually what I'm seeing though. An example of that being I've noticed that when I'm out running on a trail or even the road that for about a mile off or half a mile, I can tell if someone walking or jogging towards me is a female. Which is pretty amazing that just by that observation you could see and assume someone is a certain gender. But what I noticed would happen in my addictive thinking is I would picture a female that matched, matched what I found triggering or someone that I found beautiful. And of course, that reality almost never happened. In fact, I can't think of a single time where someone that I maybe was picturing actually matched that reality. It was usually maybe someone that's a grandma or very different than the image popping into my mind. And so as I was moving into health and recovery, I made a decision to say anytime I see a jogger or walker coming towards me, if I think they might be female, I'm going to pick a different image. Rather than allowing my brain to pick the image of someone that's triggering, I'm going to tell my brain to think about someone that I know and care about. So my go to when I'm running is I imagine the person coming towards me as my mom or my sister. Now I know it's no way it's them because they live thousands of miles away and aren't walking the streets in Portland or jogging here, because that'd be weird if they were, and really shocking. But on the other hand, that's as close to reality as what else pops into my mind. But when it's my mom I'm thinking about, I'm reminded to pray for her, to think about her as a human being. I'm reminded that I need to call her and catch up. Or if it's my sister, I think about her situation in life and to pray for her kids and her family and her husband. And now I'm having a real prayer conversation about a real person. And then whoever walks or jogs by, it doesn't really matter because that's not the image I'm focusing on. So I would encourage everyone to just identify those places in life. Whether you're driving at the gym, at a kid's soccer game, at the mall, wherever it is that you just recognize, your brain starts to pick an image of someone triggering that that's the kind of person that you're drawn to and don't feel like you're powerless over that. Pick an image of someone that you know and care about and begin to pray for them. And that just changes that pattern that what pops in your mind isn't the triggering image. It's people that you love and care about. So I think that's a really, really valuable tool to, to change that automatic kind of image image that comes into our thinking.

Well, and I would just think you'd want to pick that image before you start your day. Don't wait till you're out on the run to pick that image. Make sure you have that image already locked and loaded, ready to go. And then for some of our listeners, you know, who, like me, don't like running like you do, I think a couple other things like with that, if I know that I go to Starbucks and there are people who I'm attracted to when I'm standing in line or I tend to look, or if I'm going to the mall or if I'm going to the gym, or if I'm going to anywhere in your normal day to day that you know, you've tend to maybe had some of those thoughts or tend to catch yourself drifting in that thought life, that's the moments that you should use it. So it's, don't just think of it when, when at random something could happen, like maybe I'm on a jog but think of it throughout your day that if you have an image picked in the morning when you wake up, this is where I'm gonna be, this is what I'm gonna think. Then wherever you're at, you're gonna have that locked and loaded, ready to go.

Yeah, I've had a lot of guys tell me that one of those areas is just driving, that they'll find their eyes trying to see who around them. And that's again, one of those the reality. You cannot physically discern what someone looks like in that moment when they drive by. But we pick up on a hair color or a feature and imagine something that's not helpful. So that's one again where maybe if it's a hair color, you realize, think of a friend that you really care about that has that hair color. And just anytime I see a blonde, I'm going to pray for them and not get into that old habit of, well, who's that and who's there? Because that's where our mind is going back down those old pathways.

Definitely.

Okay, so the second practice we want to talk about in this podcast is this. To prepare for the minefields. What do we mean by that, Trevor?

So the Minefield is one of my favorite images, especially in this topic, because I think it aptly describes the day to day, especially in thought life. I think if I know spots or places that trip me up that are maybe, maybe it's not. Because I think that some of us think of when you hear prepare for the minefields or prepare ahead of time, it's like, okay, well maybe I won't drive past that strip club or that adult store or something like that. But I'm thinking more of your day to day stuff. So on your drive to work, when you pick up coffee, when you come into the office, when you're picking up your kids from work, the places where maybe you've had that time where you've tripped up before, or you've had a lustful thought, or you've allowed your mind to kind of go to places you know that they shouldn't. I think that preparing for those and knowing and identifying those is so key because if you know it, then you're already aware of it going into it, rather than when you get into the moment and you're like, oh, shoot, I know I should have prepared, but I'm not and there goes my thoughts. But if you're able to really put on the tool belt, if you will, before you start your day, before you get out on the road and into your day to day life. I think that that helps because it can be a minefield and you're going to step in stuff or you're going to see things that could really damage your journey to freedom.

Yeah, well, and I think this is an area where our groups or maybe some accountability friends can play a huge role that when we're meeting with our group and we're looking ahead at our week, if we know there's a place that's a problem to talk about it and even come up with our game plan, then. So if we say, hey, we're, you know, we're going to a hotel with the family and there's a swimming pool and we're gonna have a great time with our kids, but there's a possibility there will be other triggering things there. And here's my approach, here's what I'm planning to do. Then you're going into it guarded. Or maybe for a woman with her group, she recognizes when I go to my kids soccer game, some of the other dads seem so much more attentive and caring than my husband and we're in a bad place. And for that woman to say to her group, I'm gonna have these fantasy thoughts about what would a different life look like. And here's what I'm gonna do instead. Here's how I'm gonna prepare myself. Because those thoughts for men and women really can become defeating quickly. And it's fantasy, though. It's not real. We're playing into the fake things causing us to move away from where we want to be. And if we can recognize that ahead of time, like you were saying, we're going to be so much more prepared for that battle.

Yeah. Okay, so that's the second. So we've done pick a different image, prepare for the minefield. And then the third one is practice breath prayers. That sounds a little spiritual, Nick. What are we talking about?

Well, it is, it is spiritual, but I think in a very doable way that just about anyone can incorporate into life. And I take this from something I heard from Christian author and speaker Greg Boyd. He was saying once that there was a grocery store he went to in his town, that every time he was there, he'd find himself being very, very critical and condescending of people he was seeing that weren't like him. And so he got into a habit that as soon as he pulled into that parking lot, he would begin repeating about every person he saw. Insurpassable worth in Christ. Insurpassable worth in Christ. Or Unsurpassable, you know, he's a theologian. That's a hard word. He used bigger words than I ever would. So that was his example. But I look at that, say, I know there are places where I go that my mind is likely to drift that way. And so if I just get into this habit when I see any human being of saying something like, that's a daughter of God, that's a son of God, that's someone made in the image of God, or maybe a breath prayer like, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Every time I see any person, whether I think they might trigger negative thoughts or not, that becomes my automatic response. And what I love about this is if we can allow seeing other people or possibly triggering images to become an excuse or a reason to pray or a reason to quote Scripture that's going to not only put us in connection with God, but also if there's anything about the temptation that is fueled by an evil spirit or the enemy or the evil in our world that's some sort of spiritual attack, well, that's going to drop off right away, because the last thing the enemy wants to do is give us reminders to pray and quote Scripture. So if anything tempting triggers prayer and scripture memory, then it will reduce any kind of spiritual battle. And then we're just battling our own flesh, which is still a very serious battle. But instead of letting our mind just be this open space to let anything in, we predetermine. Here's the thoughts I'm going to pray or the verse I'm going to quote. And honestly, the simpler the better. And so if unsurpassing is a long word, just pick something much simpler that you can say over and over to remind yourself, this is what I really want to focus my thoughts on.

Well, this is a beautiful place, too, where you can. You can start to counteract the way you've objectified other people. Because what pornography specifically does is. It does. It objectifies people as really being a vessel for my sexual release or my sexual fantasies or whatever. And so I think that I know statistically that it causes men and women to objectify the opposite sex. And so this is a great way to really start to see people for who they are and their identity. And so you can kind of reclaim that and really change that tide of objectifying other people.

Yeah. And the other thing, as we make it a spiritual practice, it reminds us that these thoughts do matter. I think that's something we can battle with, is feeling like, you know, I'm not going to go anywhere with this. I'm not going to go do something I shouldn't. It's just in my thoughts. What does it matter? But you know, we know God's word tells us to take every thought captive to Christ. And so even that little thought that comes because I saw a commercial or something on TV that was triggering, if I just let it drift there, it has a way of creating a pathway versus if right away the thought is on scripture and on God, that's also a pathway. And it's taking those thoughts captive to Christ that over time will continue to renew my thoughts and transform my way of life.

Yeah, for sure.

All right, so we've got three now. Pick a different image. Prepare for the minefields, practice, breath prayers. And now the fourth practice is to call your group members. So Trevor, flesh out what is the role of a group in this thought life battle.

Yeah, so obviously when you hear call your group members, it's pretty self explanatory. But I think that one of the things I found a lot of success in is especially, and this for me, this one's tied a little bit to preparing for the minefield. And you mentioned it briefly too. The idea of if I know that certain things are going to go out through throughout my day or I know there's, you know, like even recently in my life right now, there's been a tragedy that's happened and I know that that can put me on edge. I need to proactively call my group members and say, hey, this is the kind of spot that I'm in. And I know that when I'm going through something difficult, it's easy for me to want to find any way to numb out, whether that's on my phone or whether that's sitting at the mall. And I'm one of the people who likes to people watch. And even in that, that can be really scary if I'm not focused and attentive on what my mind's doing on where I'm going. And so this is where including other people is really, really important because I'm telling them about what's going on. And what I found is that when how I'm feeling, the things I'm struggling with, maybe the areas or pockets where I know that I've been struggling recently, when I start to voice those and get them out in the open, what I found is they actually have less power over me because they're not in the dark anymore. They can't fester and grow. And so being able to bring some Things out into the light. Being able to include other people in their perspective. I'm inviting them into my process, inviting them in to help me, but then also exposing the bad thoughts, the negative things that I'm thinking or the things that I'm going through. I'm able to take away the power when I invite other people into it.

Yeah, I had an example of this a couple years ago where I had pulled into a shopping mall parking lot. I was there to get my wife a Christmas gift. A very legitimate. It was a very legitimate opportunity because.

You'Re a great husband.

You're a great husband, I'm a great husband. So I was there for the right reasons. But I realized as I was parking that all these old thoughts were kind of creeping in because a shopping mall can happen a lot of triggering places and the feeling of anonymity because I was in a larger city and I was there by myself. And so before I got out of the car, I just called a group member and they weren't even able to answer. So I left a message and I simply said, hey, I'm here at the mall. I'm running into this store looking for this gift for my wife and then I'm going to come back out and I want you to ask me when we meet at group next week how I did with that. And I hung up. It was maybe a 20 second message, but I noticed the power of those old thoughts and feelings had just totally disappeared. Now, that doesn't mean I was immune all of a sudden, but it totally changed how I felt walking to the mall. And I went in and found the gift and bought it and walked out and there was no struggle. But had I not done that, then those feelings and ideas, they just keep growing and they gain more power. So just like you said, making that decision, and even if it means just leaving a message to say, hey, here's what's going on. I'm walking into the airport, I'm heading into work, I'm going into the gym. And I can feel these. Maybe we're a little tired that day. Or as you said, there's been a tragedy in our life where we just know we're a little more emotionally vulnerable. Just to connect with someone and leave a message to say, this is where I'm going, this is why, and I'm going to do my best to guard my thoughts and would you ask me how I did it? Can totally change the power of that situation.

Well, you're never going to regret involving other people in your process. You're never going to. Okay, so we've had four now pick a different image. Prepare for the minefield practice. Breath, prayers, calling your group members. And now this one. And this is the fifth one. And I really like this one. This is one of my favorites that you get to talk about when we go and do these conferences. The fifth practice is to envision the full reality. What do we mean?

Yeah, absolutely. Well, it's one of those things I like to ask and say, what is it that makes a fantasy a fantasy? And sometimes we think, well, it's a fantasy because it hasn't happened. And the answer is no, it's a fantasy because it's not real. We're actually picturing a situation that is not going to go the way we think it's going to go. And so if we want to picture reality, reality is our friend. What we can do is take those fantasies and don't stop them. And what I mean is picture the full reality of what could and likely would happen if we made that choice. So as an example, I had a group member once that told me one of their fantasies while driving is that they'd picture they'd see a beautiful woman, she'd notice them, they'd pull over, they'd have this quick fling and they just would battle this imagery. Well, I say to that example, well, keep it going. Imagine after it ends, what next? Now there's incredible guilt and shame. There's likely a moment of having to share that with your spouse that could lead to divorce. That could lead to walking into your kid's room and explaining why dad has to move out of the house. If you chose to continue in it and get married now you're going to have two mother in laws, both of whom hate you because you've left the one to be with the other. So just keep picturing what would really happen if that occurred. Because we only imagine and our brain is actually working against us in this scenario. We only imagine what feels good. But we know there's always more to the story. So invite some reality and invite the reality of this person that maybe I'm triggered by. They're a real person that has problems and flaws and they're high maintenance and they've got issues they haven't dealt with. All those kind of things that then we go, oh, that's not really worth it because the kind of maybe the fling we imagine or that it's not even going to be what we think it is. And if we can just keep inviting truth and reality and saying what would really happen in my life? Would I sell my life for the bowl of soup? To use the Old Testament analogy of Jacob and Esau, yeah, maybe the soup would taste great. But what would I be sacrificing? And to keep coming back to that full picture of what I would be sacrificing, that's sobering. And it can make us say, I really don't want that as much as I think I do, because I'd rather have these good gifts that are in my life and not sacrifice them for something that really isn't real.

It just is almost comical. Even as you're talking about that, you're talking about seeing someone pulling over together, hooking up, and then bailing. That's not even stuff you'd see on, like, the worst comedy, like, romantic comedy scripts ever. Like, you would see that in a movie and be like, that's so dumb.

But that's what our minds do to us. Right. This could happen.

Yes.

To just confront it with, that's not real.

Right. So what I would encourage, though, is that in that, because there are times where I've practiced this and have just laughed at myself, like, really? Come on, that's ridiculous. But in that, I think that very easily can shift into shame, where it's like, wow, I can't believe I thought that. I can't believe that that's really where my head went. Is to just make sure that shame is not a part of it, that you're able to reclaim that, that thought and really envision the full reality. What you're doing is you're moving back towards health. You're not moving deeper and darker down. You're actually making that step intentionally to go in the right direction. So don't allow shame to cloud that.

Yeah. It makes me think of what one of our guests, Ben Bennett, said on this podcast a while ago, that we're trying to meet a legitimate need in an illegitimate way. And I think fantasy and the thought life really is that avenue to recognize that what I'm feeling and what I'm maybe being triggered by the need underneath it is legitimate. Maybe what I'm needing is connection. I'm needing a sense of joy in my life. I'm needing a sense of belonging or a value. There's all kinds of things that, in a healthy way, we were made for. And if I can see the need underneath the draw or the trigger, then I think I can be more equipped to deal with it and go, oh, I don't need fantasy. I don't need this crazy thought in My mind, I actually need to just go call a friend. I need to go spend some time with my spouse. I need to hang out with my kids, because I just need quality time that can move us then in the right direction. So, Trevor, all these ideas are, I think, very practical. They're very doable, but they're maybe different than what some of our listeners expected. Because when it comes to thought life, some of the classic Christian teaching, if you will, is divert your eyes. That that's been what we've trained. You know, Stephen Atterburn's book Every Man's Battle is one that most of us have read and I think has some valuable tools, but that's kind of what's presented with the thought life is just divert your eyes. So why didn't we make that one of our five? And then as a follow up to that, are there behaviors? Are there physical activities? Because everything we talked about was more mental. So are there other physical activities we should consider engaging in to change our thought life?

Look, every guy who's tried to stay pure has bounced his eyes before. Like, that's. There's nothing wrong with that. And I think that that as a practice is one that I would encourage people. I mean, if that's helpful, definitely do it. But I think that what you'll see is that that is just more of a behavior modification when we're trying to get at the root of what's really going on in so many ways. And that's one of the unique things about pure desire and what we offer is that we're actually trying to get to the core of the issues and what's happening. So I don't. I'm not saying that diverting your eyes or bouncing your eyes isn't helpful. It definitely can be. But that is kind of an in the moment type of thing where if in the moment you're triggered, you just. You immediately think that or try to bounce your eyes, where these other ones can be something that you've already planned in advance, that when that moment comes, you already have a plan, and it's something that's moving you directly and immediately into health. Now, as far as other physical actions or behaviors, this is an area I've struggled with recently in the last year, because I've started taking some steps that I think are pretty extreme. And I don't like to be viewed as the extreme Christian or the guy who has to, you know, never use a laptop again or not have a smartphone. But what I found is that and the two things I'm Referencing right now are getting off of two social media apps, and that's Instagram and Twitter. For me, every time I'd go there, even if I didn't spend time looking at something that was bad, what I'd find is that I would just be wasting time. I would be isolating. I'd be finding myself going just further and further and further in just numbing out. And so what I found is that those can trip me up and have tripped me up. And so I decided to do whatever is necessary in order to maintain freedom and integrity. And so for me, what the principle behind that is this. Do whatever it takes to stay free. Do whatever it takes in order to stay in sexual integrity, to stay in freedom and ultimately stay in community. One of my favorite things that has been said on the podcast before is the opposite of addiction is connection. It's not stopping the behavior. It's connecting with other people. And so I think that, man, I've just heard so many stories and I've thought through this a lot in my life. I just. I don't think that you'll ever regret doing what it takes to be free, but you always regret that you didn't do enough in order to really maintain that sobriety or that freedom.

Yeah, I think what you're describing there, Trevor, is practicing wisdom when it comes to our own life. That if I recognize there's an area that's just consistently triggering, it's a challenge to my thought life. And if there's a way I can change my patterns to avoid that, then it is a physical action we should take. So, for example, if it takes us two minutes longer to drive to work, but we avoid driving through an area of town or even past a store or a billboard, that creates a lot of thought life issues. Take two more minutes to drive to work. Or maybe it's that online shopping is a form of trigger and is it going to be more work to have to physically walk into school stores and. Well, yeah, but if. If that's better for you and your thought life, then it's worth it. And so it's just looking at my life as a whole to say, where are the places I am most susceptible, that my thought life just doesn't go to healthy places, and what could I do to replace them with healthier behaviors? So, yes, we practice those things, but I think back to the heart of the question about diverting the eyes. The issue there is diverting your eyes or avoiding something doesn't really change the heart. And so, yeah, we want to avoid Triggering things, but also realize we live in a world we're going to see triggering things. We're going to have things come into our thoughts because we're human beings. And like you said, we don't need to beat ourselves up and shame ourselves. And so we do want to try to avoid as much as we can, but not bank on that. Avoidance is what's going to keep me free. It's actually changing those thought patterns, transforming our thought life towards health. And that's why I think we focused on the five patterns we did is because we feel at pure desire that those have more power to actually transform our thinking, not just try to avoid evil. So it's kind of a both. And yes, we should avoid triggering things when possible, but we should also look at how do we transform our thinking?

Well, I mean, if we're to even envision that full reality, like what are you gonna do anytime one of your friends has a beautiful spouse, you're just gonna avoid them and not be friends with them. Or you can't go to this church because there are pretty people there.

Yeah. Or can be a pretty difficult thing to maintain.

Look, there are just so many things that are going on. And so you have to really do the work in order to figure out what it is going on, what's at the core and how to address that. Because, like, I think I. It was kind of one of those moments where something just kind of sporadically came out of my mouth. I know if you know me, that's not surprising. However, it was at an event. And one of the things that just came to me was that pretty people aren't going away. People who wear inappropriate clothing are not going away. The culture that we live in, it's just getting worse. It's not going to stop. And so it's not the idea of how to avoid all that stuff. It's how to change my heart and change the way that I view the world and approach my life. And then in that, making wise decisions on what to avoid and what to move forward from or to really make sure isn't a part of your life. So I think that. Please just hear me. It doesn't mean that you need to drop all of your pretty friends or all the people that potentially may have triggered you. If had a thought about. It's not about it. It's about changing your heart, not necessarily changing the exteriors. Okay, so let's end the episode with this. So we've had a couple episodes where we're giving tips and we're giving Tactics on how to do things. And I think that a major question we have is how often should we do these? We've given these people five things. How often should these practices be a part of our life? Is it just in the moment when we're tempted? Does it have to be before? When do we put these into practice?

Yeah, I think what we really want to look at here is just saying, how can I incorporate these into my daily life? How can I proactively be putting my mind on healthy things? I mean, back to my illustration of running. If I wait until I do know that someone coming towards me is attractive, I'm really waiting too long. But if, on the other hand, I just get into a habit of anytime I see anyone coming towards me, man or woman, I use as an opportunity to picture it's my mom and pray for her, picture it's my brother and pray for him. Well, that's a healthy habit that's going to guard me against all kinds of unwanted thoughts. And so if someone is feeling maybe a little bit overwhelmed, where do I start? How do I jump in? It makes me think of what we talked about in the last podcast on the ways to renew your mind, and it did seem like a lot. And Heather's advice to us to pick one, pick the one that's a great place to start and just begin to implement it. And so I think when it comes to our thought life, to look through this and say, what could I develop just as my, you know, my breath, prayer. What could be that phrase or thing that this week I just practice, as much as I remember it to say that. And if that's your one thing for this week, that's going to begin to shape and change your thoughts. If it's looking at, you know, that picking a different image, that could be the one thing you're working on this week. And do it the whole time. If it's driving, do it the whole time you're driving, not just if you think you've seen someone beautiful, because that creates a whole different environment in those places. And over time, that will just become our natural setting. I really believe that's possible. That just as maybe lustful thinking became our natural setting because in our fallenness, we just never confronted it. If we routinely confront that and choose to go in a different direction, our brain will relearn and readjust. And then naturally our drive becomes a time of prayer and without having to really think through it. So that's the goal here, isn't just avoiding the sin or avoiding the behavior it's really transforming the way we do life. And I think if we incorporate these just into our routines, we'll really find that that can happen.

Yeah, I mean, I just think that these things should always be part of our daily lives. And don't, like you're saying, don't try to do all five at the same time. That could be kind of confusing and difficult. I mean, I would need a nap after trying to do all five at the same time. But I think that just an image, a visual that's been coming to me more often is just the idea of how do you prepare yourself for battle? And you don't put on your armor when you're in the middle of the field. You put your armor on before you go out to battle. And so it's the same thing. It's all about this, this preparation and this intentional, proactive stuff that we're doing. Because habits don't just become habits. They become habits because of consistency. And so it's the matter of being consistent in our proactive nature. And this stuff, I think, is just major, major for sure. So, look, this stuff has been awesome. I think this is stuff that I know you work on still. I work on still. It's stuff that we really need. And if you're a listener out there and maybe you have other suggestions, we'd love for you to email those into us. Tell us what works and what's been helping you, and just know that the thought life is not a place where you should feel shame. A thought life is to just consistently be aggressive and go on the offensive and try to be proactive in how we change the way that we think. So, Nick, thanks so much for your time, man. Appreciate it.

Yeah, great to be here.

And thank you for listening to the Pure Desire podcast. If you like what you're hearing and want to keep up with the podcast, please subscribe. You can also rate and review our podcast and let us know how we're doing. For more information, check out our website and you can follow us on social media. Earedesirepdmi. Once again, that's earedesirepdmi. We'll see you next time. Thanks for listening to the Pure Desire Podcast. For more information, check out our website www.puredesire.org. check in each week for new content on the podcast, and we pray that it will help you find hope and freedom on your journey to purity. Sam.