Nick StumboExecutive Director driving healing from sexual brokenness

How Letting Your Guard Down Leads To Relapse

12 Aug 2026 · 0 min

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0:29

In this YouTube video, Nick Stumbo explains why a short period of success in recovery does not guarantee lasting change. He warns that after a month of consistent effort, people often assume they are “healed” and lower their vigilance. When familiar triggers—such as internet use, smartphones, or old habits—are re‑introduced, the old relapse pattern re‑emerges because the new behaviors have not yet become fully entrenched. Stumbo emphasizes that lasting change takes time to solidify, and that external observers (e.g., friends like Brent) can often detect early warning signs of relapse before the individual does, highlighting the value of outside perspective and continued caution.

So if we've been stuck in a pattern of relapse and we have a good month, we're like, I'm healed. It worked. I'm good. It's been a great— it's been a whole— like you said, Brent, like if you're doing something every day and now it's been a month, you're like, I think I'm good to go. And then we bring back in the internet or that smartphone or that pattern. And guess what happens? We fall right back into the same pattern because it really takes time for these changes to solidify and become our new normal. And that's where someone else can see that more than we can. Yeah.