A panel-style conversation (YouTube transcript) where pastors and ministry leaders describe how the Pure Desire ministry helps churches address sexual struggles and develop healthier, more authentic church culture. Speakers emphasize Pure Desire as a trusted, structured resource for discipleship, peer-led groups, and pastor support—relieving pastoral burden and providing practical tools and referrals for deeper therapy when needed.
Foreign. Let me ask you this question. How have you seen pure Desire groups or the ministry help you as a pastor create a healthier culture of just more authenticity in your church community, especially around the area of sexual struggle or sexual health. And just talking about it, how have you seen that lived out there in your faith community?
This. This is the easiest question in the world to answer there, Ronnie.
This is.
Well, they always give me the easy ones, so.
Okay, okay, well, you gave me one. So this, this is. Man, I. I can't tell you how valuable it's been for me to address something like sexuality, human sexuality, pornography, the difficulties that, that we all, you know, face in these arenas and have a. A tremendously tried and true and trusted resource in the walls of our church to point people to. Because I, I'm. I'm a man, I'm a pastor. I've. I've gotten victory in certain areas. I've struggled in certain areas. And, and I mean, I can give you. I can give you scripture and I can talk about salvation and, and that's about where it stops with my expertise when it comes to this. But to have pure desire within the walls of the organization, to say, here, here's the scriptural standard, here's the freedom that many of us walk in and the freedom that you want, and here are the tools to get there, that has been something that has been so just beneficial to us around here that I can point at the people in the congregation saying, gentlemen, if you got a problem, you're going to go talk to Jeff. Ladies, if you got a problem, you're going to go talk to Ann. You know, and they've got an ongoing course, discipleship tool for you in this. And to have such confidence in that tool, man, it has been absolutely invaluable to us here.
I just got to hear Shanti Feldhun speak at a Christian Counselors association meeting, and she talked about the pressure that a lot of pastors and leaders feel that, that in every congregation, you've got like a triangle of people with issues. And you might have those at the top of the triangle that have severe, you know, high, high level need. You've got the mid level and then kind of low level, like, I just need help or advice. And what she pointed out in this illustration, the other triangle at the top of it was the pastor. And she said, in so many churches, no matter what level of struggle someone's at, all the arrows go to the pastor or the leader. It's like, help me. Help me fix this. And I, I Think we hear that from a lot of pastors and leaders who feel overwhelmed and overburdened and. And they're not an expert at everything. I mean, none of us can be an expert at everything. And so some areas, people come to us, we feel qualified, and other areas, maybe especially like, sexuality, we're like, I'm not sure what to do, but we're the one that everything comes to. And I think what you shared is just so much the heartbeat of pure desire that we want to be that trusted resource that we're not there to cast vision for you or preach or all that's what God's called and gifted you to do. But in your leading and preaching and vision casting, when people feel compelled of, like, okay, I want to deal with this in my life, for you to know that there's that handoff of like, oh, here's people in our church that have walked this road, that are using some really quality resources. They're not just making it up as they go along. You know, they're not just talking about life in general. Like, they're actually working through a process of healing and they can help you. And, you know, you just expressed it, having those people in your church. You don't even know how to say how much that's meant to you. And I think there are so many leaders that are just missing that component of people are coming to them because they've created this environment where people want help. But if it's all up to them, it's overwhelming. And so in any way we can, whether you're listening and you're a leader or you're in a church to create that imagery of, hey, this could really help a pastor, this could really help a leader have a lot less on their plate because they would have people they trust to say, man, this group in our church, this couple in our church, this man, this woman, this is the road they've walked. And I trust them in this area to really be a guide for you as well. And it's exciting to hear the way that you guys have really experienced that in your church.
Well, I was just going to. Like I said, it's been invaluable. And then to me, even on a relational level with our director of pure desire, his name is Jeff. Like I already mentioned, he and I meet every third Wednesday. We get together and just spend an hour talking and praying and talking about our lives, our ministry, our brotherhood, and the things that even he has given me. I can't tell you how many times I've been Preparing for a sermon or I've got a comment I'm going to make along these lines on a Sunday morning. And I'll go, hey, Jeff, will you give me some insight into this? You know, what am I missing here? What do I need to understand here? So it's not just even as a communal benefit that we have, but a personal benefit. Walking closely with this guy has been, I mean, it's something as silly as we couldn't have kids for a long time, so became parents. I was 41 years old and we had twins and a boy and a girl. And I had this just question out of nowhere, forgive me if this is inappropriate. All you know when to stop, like taking showers in front of your kids. You know, when did, when does that become inappropriate? And Jeff's in my house, I'm like, hey, Jeff, you got some insight in this man. He came with receipts. He's like, well, here's where, here's the age you got to really start watching this. And you know, these things can become problematic later on in life if you're exposed after this and this age. And I'm like, so not only ministerially and communally, but individually. I'm like, ah, thanks. Pure desire. Help me understand how to not screw up my kids.
You know, Ken and Nick, I just doubled down on what you said, Ken, because when I was a pastor in Idaho and I realized how excited I was to come back from a training of Dr. Ted and Diane, our founders, and really say I found competent, resource and compassionate people and this is going to help our congregation. It just relieved me of, like, I don't just have to just share my story and hope people all get into therapy. But there's a, there's a process now where we can get more people stepping toward healing. Some need more therapeutic work, and that's resources there. But it's so great to start educating and understanding. And I couldn't, I couldn't agree anymore. Just about a competent resource to help churches. Sam.
