A moderated discussion among Pure Desire leaders about handling disclosures of potentially reportable illegal activity (notably child pornography) in recovery/support groups. Speakers agree child pornography should generally be treated as reportable, note gray areas and inconsistent agency responses, and outline leader practices: refer to authorities when in doubt, limit group discussion of specific illegal incidents, allow members to remain until a formal investigation/charges arise, use intake screening, and offer alternative safe channels (lawyer, therapist, pastor) for sharing details. The emphasis is balancing legal duties and creating a safe, redemptive environment.
Another scenario, I think that comes up in a lot of groups, Rich, because, you know, people are struggling with watching content online, and what's online and available is more and more broad and diverse and evil. And there is a lot of illegal pornography out there of underage, of children. So I've had group members ask, like, if I have viewed or, you know, they'll say I accidentally saw or maybe intentionally. But if someone is viewed, like child porn, do they need to report? Is that reportable? How does that situation work?
Yeah, unfortunately, this. This is. I would say this is one of the bigger reporting issues that I've come across in the last year or so. So much more child porn use. I mean, we know it's out there. It's just. It's everywhere. Right? So short answer. Yes. When. When I look in his book. Child porn is reportable. Yeah, but there's a lot of gray areas in there. So again, this is that one where it's like you refer out to, you know, call cps, call the sheriff, say, hey, I have this situation. You're watching child porn. Here's an example. We actually literally made a report. We called and said, the sheriff said, yes, child porn is a reportable offense. We called cps. CPS said, no, it's not a reportable offense. So in the same city, in this.
Interesting.
So it's really. You just have to really do your homework a little bit. And again, this is one where child porn. I just say child porn across the board, it's reportable. For us, as a PD group leader, we're just gonna say, hey, this needs to be reported.
That's our standard.
And then if they decide to do anything on the legal side with that, then we've done our part of creating that safe spot. When in doubt, reach out. It's just. It's so hard when you have an agency tell you that it's not reportable. And, you know, we're trying to follow what we know to be true just in our group guidelines. As a leader reaching out and saying, hey, this is. So it's very difficult when you have agencies that aren't on the same page, but we're following a guideline, and that just protects our group leaders and the individual.
Well, as I think listeners are well aware, this is a messy issue, even in just what you just said. Like, it's. It's not always easy. It can be confusing. So it's an area that can cause group members some hesitation and maybe sharing their story because they're like, oh, my gosh, what if it's a gray area or. I don't. I don't know. So how do we handle this situation? If a group member has legal issues or potential legal issues as part of their story, what. And what can the group member do?
Yeah, I think once if a report is made, this comes up. This is a great question. If a report. If I have to report somebody at that point, I'll say, hey, you can stay in group, but just don't say anything else about that incident situation. Yeah, if charges are brought up, then we'll have to bring them. Have them step out of group. So if they're. If it becomes a pending legal investigation, then at that point we would have them step out of group. And again, that is really making the group, you know, setting that tone early about keeping the group safe and handling that. So a lot of times we get guys that come into group that will sign a memo of understanding. They'll start a group and then find out that was we're into pillar one, two, or three. Then it's like, oh, hey, I am under investigation. It's like, you know, because we even asked that question, I believe, on the registration specifically for online groups, if there's any pending. And I know a lot of churches will ask that on their intake, whether It's Sexual Integrity 101 Conqueror series. They'll ask because we tell them to say to get that information up front. But I do, I do think it's really important for me. I just have a heart for those guys because that's my story. And I would hate for anybody to look at a guy who wants to come forward and not just love them where they're at and care for them, because they're at the point now where it's like, I need to tell somebody. And that's an important part. Place to get to. And if we drop the ball at that point, they may never tell anybody ever again. They may reoffend, they may do whatever, because that was the one opportunity to get them to the point where they can jump into recovery.
And I think that's been my encouragement to again acknowledge in some of these maybe challenging parts of a workbook to say, hey, I get that for some or maybe one of you in our group, there may be legal issues that are a part of your story. And we just want you to know we love you and we care about you, but we want this to be safe for everybody and not create a reporting situation. So we want to help you take that to the right place, either your lawyer or your Therapist or your pastor who will be more equipped to know how to direct you for the purpose of the group, I'll encourage them. There are a lot of ways we can share those parts of our stories without getting specific and making it a reporting situation. Because, you know, for example, someone could say, you know, I was, I was in an inappropriate relationship and the group doesn't need to know. I mean, if that was when I was a certain age and they were maybe underage, like in the group situation, they don't need to know that for you to get the benefit of sharing. I was in an inappropriate relationship and here's what was happening, or here's why, or here's what I learned, or here's what changed, or for someone to say, you know, I was looking at things online that I shouldn't have been, and if you're not sure you should share any, in most groups anyway, even sharing what kind of material you were looking at would be triggering anyway. Yeah, that's not what we do. So those specifics, just to say, hey, if it is something we want to help you deal with it, as Rich has talked about, it's going to help you, I think, actually own your story and find freedom. But in the group, that's not the place to share those specifics. So if you need to just leave that piece out. And I've just found even in a couple of situations where someone did have some legal concerns, they got tremendous benefit from group without having to share some of the particulars of their situation.
I love how just when we talk about, we look at the roots and not the fruits. Right. I mean, that's an often thing that we talk about. And I've said it, I think, in podcasts before. It's like, it's like, I don't necessarily, I don't wanna say care, but necessarily care of, like, how they're acting out unless there's a reportable issue. It's like, what's that driving force behind why you chose to do what you're doing? So I think when we can get to that point where we're sharing with those guys that piece, it's like, why did you go there? What happened in your life that you made you feel like that you have to go around this.
Yeah. I think it's just clear from our conversation that you need to tell somebody. That doesn't necessarily have to be in your group, but that is a part of your healing. And people who have had illegal activity or have been abusers, like a group is what they need. I mean, they need to figure out what is going on underneath. To your point, so.
