Harmonyx Cabaret 2014 Sat 800 Missing Opening Number

Two performers improvise a chaotic cabaret sketch mixing Star Wars, Disney, and musical theater parody. They trade personas from Princess Leia to wedding planner, argue over a girl, and constantly break character to mock the script itself. It's pure nonsense designed to celebrate fandom and the absurdity of live performance.
Chapters
—to one town. But we both cannot have her, so it's one or the other. It's like, boom! And one day you'll discover that she's my girl. I don't build you up to be let down, but I really feel it's time. You know, she said that I'm the one for her because she said I'd blow her mind. The girl is mine. Yeah, right. She is. The doggone girl is mine right now. Step aside. What's that? Don't waste your time. Back off. Because the doggone girl is mine.
I will have her. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Stop fighting. We're here to have fun. I'm so excited! We're finally doing this! Look, I brought us lunches so we don't even have to waste time standing in line. You two are the best friends a girl could ask for. I'm pretty sure we've been talking about doing this since the third grade.
Yes, talks of this began In the first grade. Whatever. Come on, let's go find the line.
I'll stay with the counselor if you'll get her bags, Commander. Oh, Dad, isn't life magical? I feel as though all of my fondest wishes are coming true. Yeah, well, it's a good thing I love you. My feet are just killing me. Oh, but you look so beautiful. Seriously? I'm Cinder-freaking-Rolla. Are you kidding me? I wanted to be Wonder Woman. Good heavens. Hey girls. Marcella! Oh, I thought that we each decided to dress as I'm the princess! My deepest apologies if I wasn't clear, but you don't fit our theme. What are you talking about, Mikayla? Look at you guys. This isn't DisneyCon, it's Comic-Con. You know Star Wars? I'm Princess Leia. Oh, she knows. She's thinking. Well, I suppose. Well, she is a princess. And didn't Disney buy Star Wars just now? I think I saw that on YouTube somewhere. So although her story's not quite uniform with ours, she does end up finding her true love and vanquishing the evil foe. And kissing her brother. Whatever. Hey, royalty is royalty, no matter who you have to kiss to get there. I own a million diamonds in the place. I get my weeks from happily ever after. I'm in love with my dress in a glitzy town, in my own castle. But every song is like poison apples. Home before the clock strikes midnight. Fall down, Obi-Wan Kenobi, we don't care. We're driving Cadillacs down the street. And every song is like lost glass slippers, waiting on true love's kiss, Jedis, Death Stars, godmothers on speed dial. You all care. You're all caught up in our love affair. And we'll always be royal. Royal. It just runs in our blood. That kind of luxe is just for us. And it's a wicked kind of buzz.
Royal ruler.
knows us know that we're fine with this. We have a lot of mouthpiece, but every song is like poison apple. Only want the blood, stress, midnight vodka. Only want the no be, we don't care. We're driving Cadillacs down the street and everybody's like lost glass sippers. There's a speed dump, you all care. You're all caught up in our love affair, and we'll always be rolling over. It just runs in our blood. The Cadillac's just for us, and it's a wicked kind of bus. Let me be your ruler, ruler. You can call me baby, and baby, I'll rule, I'll rule the world. Because I live that fantasy. Oh, oh, oh, we're better than we ever dreamed. And I'm in love with being queen. Oh, oh, oh, life was great without a care. You're all caught up in our love affair. And we'll always be royals. It just wasn't our blood. That kind of luck is just for us, and it's a wicked kind of fun. So maybe you'll rule, you can go and creep me, and maybe I'll rule, because I live that fantasy. Yeah! Oh, I do hope we see some dwarves or sweet woodland creatures. Really? Because I'm here to find a hot cot with only shirts on. No, no, no, no, I want to see some Stormtroopers, a whole bunch of them, so I can use my new blaster. Look, there's no need to be nervous.
Look, the girls you meet at this place are amazing. This is going to be tons of fun. Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill. Look, we've tried every other possible way of meeting someone, and to be quite frank, this is your last chance. I'm just not getting the Han Solo voice right now. What do you think it is? What am I missing? Oh, real mature, nerf herder. Oh, who's scruffy looking? Fine, let's just get in line. I'll work on the Han Solo voice later.
Honey, are you almost done in there? I know you went through a lot of trouble to plan this surprise for our anniversary, but I have no idea what I'm wearing. This isn't going to get all freaky, is it? I don't think I've been I was thinking dinner reservations, tickets to that new Cirque du Soleil show that's in town. Now I look like Cirque du Soleil. Honey! Can you hurry up in there? I'm very excited, totally terrified to find out where we're going. We're first. Comic-Con? You brought us to a comic convention for our anniversary? What are you doing? There is no way that floor is sanitary for kissing. Oh, stop hugging people! Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. What are you doing? Oh, are you a dwarf? Excuse me? No, no, no, let me guess. Happy? Orthopy? Oh! I'm an elf. Arwen. And this is... Argonauts? Like Jason? Oh! Aragog. That's a dragon. Is that a dragon? I'm trying! Aragorn! This is Aragorn. Oh! I get it, she's grumpy!
You know what, Julie, I think you're right. Miss Arwen does look pretty uncomfortable. Excuse me, Elf, I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse. Would you like a chair to sit in for a little while?
Oh, actually, yes, that would be great.
Here you go. We could be standing around for quite some time.
Thank you. What are you due? Uh, just a couple months. Oh, that's awesome! That's so exciting! Yeah, you're killing me. I need to sit down too. Seriously, behave yourself! She's only pregnant! Oh my goodness!
We should probably stay close together throughout the day because, you know, we do end up married in the end. Sounds like a plan. I would kill you where you stand if you weren't my best friend. You wouldn't dare kill number one. You have far too much honor. Are you sure? Because I knocked out a number two about 20 minutes ago.
What are you doing? What is it with you and furry creatures? He is the biggest, most adorable woodland creature I've ever seen! Don't you think? I wish it, wish it were the one I had. Seriously, that's weird. Seriously.
No need to wax philosophical or poetic. Yes, Snow White is a lovely creature, but I'm pretty sure her character is into, you know, sort of man with a pickaxe, hi-ho, and all that kind of stuff. You can go talk to her if you like.
Well, children, this voice is not quite right. Rude. He says the line's moving.
And in this twisted face, there's not the slightest trace of anything that even hints of kindness. And in my tortured shape, no comfort, no escape. I see, but deep within is utter blindness. Hopeless as the dream dies, as the time flies. Love, a lost illusion. Helpless, unforgiven. Cold and -driven to this sad conclusion. No beauty could move me, no goodness improve me, no power on earth if I can't love. —No passion could teach me, no lesson could reach me how I could have loved her and make her love me too. If I can't love her, than who? Long ago I would have seen all the things I could have been. Careless and unthinking, I moved moved onward. No pain could be deeper, no life could be cheaper, no point anymore if I can't love her. No spirit could win me, no hope left within me. Hope I could have loved her and that she'd set me free. But it's not to be. If I can't love her, let the world world be done with me.
Okay, girls, I've got it all planned out. The first thing that we have to do is find the limited edition Death Star model with actual blueprints and realistic battle sounds. It's the only thing I came here for, and I'm not leaving without it. She has on her crazy eyes! Okay, I think it's gonna be over here. Well, come on! Let's go! Time's a-wastin'!
She's got feet too! Okay, so Chewie, I'm pretty sure the limited edition Death Star model with actual blueprints and realistic battle sounds is going to be over here. I will die without it. Oh, that was not dramatic at all. I live a hard life. Oh, what's been hard? Some people say a man is made out of mud. A poor man's made out of muscle and blood. Muscle and blood and skin and bone. A mind that's weak and a back that's strong. You load 16 tons. What do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt. St. Peter, don't you call me 'cause I can't go. I owe my soul to the company store. I was bored one morning when the sun didn't shine. Picked up my shovel, then I walked to the mine. 16 tons of number 9 coal I was Draw, I said. Well, bless my soul, you lost 16 tons. What do you care? Another day older and deeper in debt. St. Peter, don't you call me 'cause I can't go. I owe my soul to the company store. If you see me coming at you, step aside. A lot of men did, a lot of men died. One fist of iron, the other of steel. If the right one don't get you, then the left one will. You load 16 tons, what do you carry? Another day younger and deeper in debt. St. Peter, don't you call me 'cause I can't go. I owe my soul. To the company store.
Gentlemen, would either of you happen to know where the restroom is?
I had some Romulan ale that didn't agree with me. More like Capri Sun. Yes. So the bathroom is around the corner, first on your right. Are you quite certain to the right? To the right. Thank you. Tak na. Did he just say tak na? No idea what that even means, but it doesn't matter because I just told him where the women's bathroom was. Wrap it up, buzzball. He wants a hot dog.
Fine, I'll get you a hot dog. Do I want anything? No, I'm only growing a human.
Why would I need to eat? Oh, watch your step, She-El. My phaser is set to kill. Yeah, Lieutenant, my wife can take care of herself.
She's not your wife. I'm sorry. I'm pretty sure that was my fault. Oh no, that was me. I was blinded by the rage of a thousand burning suns. I just didn't see you. Yeah. Everything okay? No, I don't.
Wonderful to be in love with such a strong and independent woman, with the spirit of a stallion, the courage of an Amazon. But I want you to know that I would defend you to the death if you asked me to.
Wow, that's a really nice speech.
Commander, you are pathetic. I am going to find the men's room. Restroom.
Wow, Rob, you are really into this. That is so awesome. Kevin never would have been this cool about character development. Kevin? Who, who's Kevin? Are you joking? Kevin and I have only been dating for 2 years. Kevin Reynolds?
Yes, my lab partner from senior year. Yes. Acne face, personality dry as a wheat thin? That Kevin?
Hey, be nice. You haven't objected the last few years.
Why? Why? I'm so much more manly and charming, chivalrous and magnificent.
Okay, Kevin. I'll tell you why, Kevin. You won't find him drinking under the table, playing dice and staying out till 3. I don't do that anymore. You won't find him ever being unfaithful. You will find him, you'll find him next to me. You won't find him trying to chase the devil, but money's in more power power out of grief. You won't ever find him where the rest go. You will find him, you'll find him next to me, next to me, next to me, next to me. You will I'll find him, you'll find him next to me. When the money's gone and all my friends have vanished, and I can seem to find no love or help for free, I know there's no need for me to panic, 'cause I'll find him, I'll find him next to me. When the sky is grey and all the doors are closing, And the rising fresh dawn makes it hard to breathe. When I need a hand to stop those tears from falling, I will find him. I'll find him next to me. Next to me, he, hoo-hoo-hoo. Next to me, he, hoo-hoo. Next to me, he, hoo-hoo-hoo. Also, he's modest, which is the last character trait he'd date.
Come on, John William. Dude, did you just kiss your biceps? What are you doing? Just shut up, okay? I don't want to talk about it. The John Williams panel is starting. Are you coming? Yes, of course I'm coming.
Honey, my feet are really hurting. Do you think you could rub them while we stand in this line? Honey? Hello? Ugh, rub my own feet. So this John Williams guy, is he hot?
I don't know. He's 82 and bald. So do you need to be in this line, lassie?
Oh, somebody's throwing something there. You know, you should get that looked at. He's so fluffy, I'm gonna die! Oh, whoa, hot Han. I mean, hi Han. Okay, so you may be ruggedly handsome, but it doesn't give you license to be rude.
This is John Williams after all. He's kind of an icon.
Oh, I totally agree. We have that in common. I know. Great. I'm gonna go back to my friends now. See you later. Oh, I don't laugh like that. I can't take it! I've been walking around on swollen feet all day! I'm wearing this ridiculous costume and I'm starving! I'm going to wait in the car and don't follow me! I said don't follow me! We should follow her! She said not to follow her. We should follow her! Whatever. Looks like you're missing a shoe. Keep it up and I might miss another one.
Hey, Invisible Man, don't you think you should follow your pregnant wife? She might get the idea that you aren't really there for her. Yeah, yeah, women can see right through excuses.
That's a good one, too.
Trust me, it was hilarious. Oh no, no, the women are fine. They'll get there. It's okay. Plus, this is John Williams. John Williams.
You must use the Force. You must use the Force.
You must use the Force. You must use the Force. You must use the Force. You must use the Force. You must use the Force. Once, time ago, far, far away, long, long ago, Time ago, far, far away, kiss a Wookiee, fly the Falcon through an asteroid, till the princess is a boy. This is spaceships, it's monsters, it's Star Wars, we love it, come and help me, Obi-Wan. X-wing fighters and a blaster gun, dance with Ewoks. Oh, what fun! This is spaceships, it's monsters, it's Star Wars, we love it! Get in there, you big furry wolf! I couldn't care less what you smell! I take orders from only me! Maybe you'd like it back in your saddle, Your Highness, Your Worshipfulness, Your Highness, Your Worshipfulness! No one cares if you upset a droid! Nobody cares if you upset a droid! Don't tell your took stock in. Nobody cares. I suggest a new strategy: let the Wookie win. That's because nobody cares if he upset the droids. Now we listen to Luke whining, one more season, one more season, one more season, one more season. I was gonna go to Tosh. One more season, one more season. Station 4 Power, come forward us. Now I Guess I'm going nowhere. It just isn't fair. One more season.
One more season. One more season. One more season.
One more season. Wookiee, Wookiee, Wookiee, Wookiee. Someone move this walking carpet. Someone give this Wookiee a break. Wookiee, Wookiee, kiss your brother, kiss your brother, kiss your brother. Kiss your sister, kiss your sister. Kiss your mother, kiss your brother. You know anything about women? Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy? Whoa, I'm your father.
He's using us for more business.
Come with me, my son, we will rule. Such a pity, it is true. So you have a twin sister. Only one was wise till night. If you will not turn, then perhaps she will give in to your lures. You are mine. Long, long, long time ago, far, far, far away, kiss a book, kiss a book, keep it trolley, keep it trolley. Fly the falcon and an asteroid. This is spaceships, it's monsters, it's Star Wars, we love it, it's true. It's October 7th, 2015, so let's go forth, let's sing goodbye, fly me to the constellation I like, and trust the time. May the Force be with you all. John Williams is the man!
Men. Men are pigs.
No, silly.
Pigs are pigs. But sometimes men just don't know how to listen to the music in their hearts. Can we get anything for you? Marcella. What? She's pregnant. That's deaf. Oh, these buns. No, thank you. I think it's just the hormones. The raging hormones. Go ahead and let it all out. The least we can do is listen. Oh no, I'm not one to air my grievances to strangers. I'm a fairly reserved individual. But I do really like this song. Your love is like a tidal wave. Spinning over my head. Trying to hear your promises that left unsaid. You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasy. The eventual winner, and you know that you were born to be. You're a heartbreaker. Dream maker, love taker, don't you mess around with me. You're a heartbreaker, dream maker, love taker, don't you mess around.
Not now.
Your love has set my soul on fire, burning out of control. Guitar The waves of desire that was taken as hell. You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasy. The abyss of a winner, and you know that you were born to be. You're a heartbreaker, dream maker, love taker. Don't you mess around with me. You're a Heartbreaker, dream maker, club taker. Don't you mess around, not now. Release my inner fantasy. The invincible winner. To know that you were born to be. You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker, love taker. Don't you mess around with me, all right? Heartbreaker, dreammaker, love taker. Don't you mess around with me, all right? Heartbreaker, dreammaker, love taker. Dream Maker, love taker, don't you mess around with me, you're a heartbreaker. Dream Maker, love taker, heartbreaker. Okay, so that's intermission. Take about 15 minutes. People will bring you your desserts. Oh, hi! Did you want to talk about the bathrooms? Okay. Okay, see you in 15!
What else could I do? I'm so inspired by you. This hasn't happened for the longest time. Once I thought my innocence was gone. Now I know that happiness goes on. That's where you found me when you put your arms around me. That hasn't happened for the longest time. Maybe this won't last very long, but you feel so right. I could be wrong. Maybe I've been hoping too hard, but I've come this far and it's more than I've hoped for. Who knows how much further we'll go on? Maybe I'll be be sorry when you're gone. I want you so bad. I think you ought to know that my intention's to hold you for the longest time. Hey, darling, I said to myself, hold on to your heart. Now I know the woman that you are. You're wonderful, So far, and it's more than I hoped for. I don't care what consequence it brings. I have been hopeful for lesser things. I want you so bad. I think you ought to know that I intend to hold you for the longest time. Whoa, the longest, for the longest time. Everybody's okay with these being up here the entire show, right?
Especially these guys and those guys. Clearly that was not part of the show. Yes, yes, yes. Oh, very, very yes.
I can go on living now. No, no, no, this is my moment and let me have it.
Come on, girls, let's hurry. I think we have enough time to catch the other jumpers. Hurry! Oh, you got my game! Call the guy. There's only one left. One left. No, no, no. No! Oh no, oh no, what's happening to my eyes? Oh, oh, stop! You're in black and white! Color! Food has lost its flavor! Life holds no joy!
Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck. Some nights I call it a draw. Some nights I wish that my lips could build a castle. Some nights I wish they'd just fall off. But I still wake up, I still see your ghost. Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for. Whoa, what do I stand for? What do I stand for? Most nights I don't know anymore.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Whoa! What in the heck does this have to do with the scene that just happened? This makes absolutely no sense, right?
Who wrote this script? Hey! I wrote it. Don insisted that we sing this song. I didn't know where else to put it. It doesn't fit anywhere. He's killed my dreams of the Best Original Script Oscar.
Nicole, I thought it sounded wonderful.
Let's finish.
It's fast, man. Anyway, I think we need to get back to the scene. A very, you know, climax. Leia wants the Death Star. Life has no color. No food.
Okay. And— oh, oh, it's you! Yes, you got it! I Oh, it's beautiful!
Oh, it is very lovely, is it not? Yes. Would you— would you like to touch it? Yes. Or smell it? It is magnificent. Oh, please.
Oh, what a recollectible smell! It is very, very nice.
I am so sorry you did not get it. Could I maybe buy you a Slurpee? Strange cream for curry.
Staring at your phones all day has made me really hungry.
Can we please go buy the Cinnabon? Okay.
Thank you. Come on, honey, you're going to thank us for this later. No, no, no, I don't want to go. I want to smell it one more time. Can I lick it?
Oh no, no, you'll lick you by!
You'll lick you by! Please, leave my legs here! I want to save you!
You really got to work on that honk. But I mean, I got it, so— Oh no, please. Ah, Counselor, what has happened between you and the Commander? Did he hurt you? I will rip his arms off!
Wow, that's a really nice offer, but I think I'm the one that hurt him. See, I honestly think he didn't know that Kevin and I had been dating for 2 years. I mean, 2 years! How oblivious can you get?
The commander is quite oblivious. Yes, he is. Kevin? Kevin Reynolds? The kid who smelled like soy sauce? That Kevin Reynolds? What about me? I'm fairly fluent in Klingon. Hadvid!
Two years! I thought you two were my best friends! Give me your phaser! Now!
Phaser, set to kill!
I can't believe this! Now away with you, furry creature!
I reflect on my reflection, and I ask myself the question: what's the right direction to go? I don't know. Am I a man or am I a Klingon? Are you serious? Are you a Klingon? What? If I'm a Klingon, then I'm a very manly Klingon. Mildly. Am I a Klingon loser or am I a man? Yeah, you're a man. Who's saying that? I'm a man that makes be a cling-on of a man. Maybe a clingy man. Am I right? Am I right? Ruining my song. Poor guy. As I look into these eyes, I do not recognize the one I see inside. Well, this is awkward. Time for me to decide. Am I a man, or am I a Klingon? I hope you had a breath mint. Those poor front rowers. I'm a Klingon, and I'm a very manly Klingon. I'm pretty sure you live with your mommy. Or am I a man? Yep, he's a mama's boy. If I'm a man, that makes me a Klingon of a man. Just keep on dreaming there, buddy. Here I go again, I'm always running out of time. I think I've made up my mind, now I understand what you are. Just wait for it, this one gets good.
You're a nerd!
You're a very nerdy nerd. I will find you and I will kill you. Where's that voice coming from? The guy over here said it. You with no hair, come here. I will hack you. You right here, you with the— How dare you insult my mother! I will tear your scalp from your skull! Computer lights off. Computer, beautiful Klingon woman. Commander, I didn't expect you to appear on the holodeck. What have you— Commander, that's You're a spout even for a Klingon. Get your nose out of the shoe. Anyway, what is it? It's mine. My own.
My precious.
Commander, it's just a shoe. Actually, it's Cinderella's glass slipper. I'm gonna find her and finish the fairy tale. Well, Commander, I'll help you finish the fairy tale provided you stop sniffing it. Agreed. Just give me the shoe.
It's mine. My heart will be silent no longer! And I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you. I hope that hurt.
Anywhere I would have followed you.
Say something, I'm giving up on you. This does not get any easier for you, man.
And I will swallow my pride. For some reason, you're the one that she loves.
She's saying goodbye. Me. Say something, I'm giving up on you. I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you anywhere Where I would have followed you. Oh, oh, oh.
Say something, I'm giving up on you.
Say something, I'm giving up on you. I swear if you don't, I'm going to knee you in your little book bag. My dear, fair princess, I have loved thee since I first saw thee.
Your voice is like an angel. Your heart is light and warm. It would be my pleasure to take you to dinner.
May I pick you up from your cottage on Friday? At 7, please. She'd love to. G'day, princess.
I really admire your passion, and I think you should have this.
Thank you.
I think it's yours.
I really, I really couldn't. Are you sure? I'm absolutely sure. You should have got her number.
Hon?
Yes, Leia? I heard about joint custody.
You are wonderful! I'd gladly jump in a vat of carbonite for you. I'll tell you what, let's go back to my place. Yeah. Let's reenact the scene where, you know, you saved me from Joma's palace. I would love that.
Can I just say something crazy?
I love crazy.
All my life has been a series of doors in my face, and then suddenly I bump into you.
I've been searching my whole life to find my own place. I've Maybe it's your funds talking.
What a comic hump these ones have taken.
I see your face and it's nothing like I've ever known before. Love is an open door. Love is an open door. Love is an open door with you.
With you. With you, love is an open door. I can get down.
You know what's crazy? What? We finish each other's—
Sandwiches. That's what I was going to say. I never met someone who thinks so much like me. Jinx! Jinx again! Our mental synchronization can have but one explanation. You and I were just meant to be. Say goodbye, say goodbye to the pain of the past.
We don't have to feel it anymore. Love is an open door, love is an open door.
Life could be so much more with you, with you, with you. Leah, can I say something crazy?
Would you marry me?
Can I say something even crazier? Yes! This is just great. Just great. I'm the one that came to this thing to find a hot guy, and instead my two best friends end up leaving with somebody. You know, this would have never happened to Wonder Woman. I'm pretty sure this belongs to you. You think? Yeah.
Can I help you slip it back on? Whatever. Oh, oh, oh! It's a match. Oh, man. So I was wondering if you would like to come back to my place for a drink.
A drink? Did you say a drink? Yes! I've been waiting all day for a drink. Let's go. Come on.
So my mom makes these great milkshakes and killer chocolate chip cookies.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did you say your mom? Yeah, well, yeah, I did. You live with your mom?
Well, I mean, she's not exactly my mom. She's my dad's fourth wife, so So she's basically my stepmom.
Whoa, Cinderella does not do stepmothers. It's you. No, I didn't even make it to the car. I did find one of those chair massage places. I just hung out there all afternoon. Well, you should be. I mean, did you even think about me when you planned this? My pockets? This thing has pockets? Pockets? Oh! Dinner reservations, tickets to Cirque du Soleil. This was your plan all along, wasn't it, honey? Ugh, I feel ridiculous. I mean, I've been walking around all day like a crazy person. Well, that's very nice of you to say, but I feel completely— Oh! Oh, oh. When did you learn to dab? What we have is real, isn't it, honey? I mean, people wait their whole lives for something like this. Ah! We are in public.
Commander, what has happened? Security team to the lobby. I went outside to get some fresh air and some teenagers pelted me with water balloons.
Oh, I thought there was just a lovely spring shower. Those cots! Let me at them! I'll get them for you! I'll get them! Whoa, whoa, whoa, sister. Look right here. Calm down. We've been through this before. I haven't. Well, that's true. You see, Cinderella here, she protected Snow and I in high school from the bullies in exchange for her art— well, my tutoring. Snow just brought the apple pies. And for the rest of us, we've We've all had targets on our backs, whether it was junior high or high school or college.
Ooh, really, Dad? You know, just the first 4 years. It doesn't matter.
At any age, being a nerd is tough. That's right, but we're not afraid to do it. Yes. Well, we all have our sad stories. My great old bright trapper keeper? And my My Little Pony hair bows?
My Pokémon card club in high school?
Hey, but what have we got to be ashamed of? We're just like everybody else, aren't we? Well, we are. I mean— Look, dry your eyes, my friends. Today is our day. Yeah, you know, for a crazy person, you kind of make a lot of sense, sister. No, we ain't going to take it. We're not going to We can't take it anymore. We've got the right to choose, and there's no time to lose.
This is our life, this is our song. We'll fight the powers that be. Just don't kick our destiny 'cause you don't know us. You don't belong.
We're not gonna take it. No, we're not gonna take it. Shoot it. I'm getting it. We're not gonna take it anymore.
I'm a good executioner. You're so condescending.
Your gall is never-ending. Come on, we don't want nothing, not a thing from you. Your life is straight and dated, boring and confiscated. If that's your best, your best, won't you tell them, sister? Yeah, we're free! Yeah, we'll fight! Yeah, you'll see! Yeah, we're not going to take it! You want me to shoot you? No, we're not going to take it!
We're not going to take it anymore.
Yeah, we're not going to take it. No, we're going to take it.
We're not going to take it anymore.
We're not going to take it. Come on! No, we're not going to take it.
We're not I'm not gonna take it anymore.
Thanks for a great day, everyone. It was really fun. Yes, it was. I didn't mean you two. Yeah, I had a pretty good day. I can do this.
This has definitely been one of the best days, right?
We need to really work on that. I know it will help. Okay, we'll watch Star Wars episodes 4, 5, and 6. The Star Wars marathon. Yes, and we can cuddle with our baby. He has your eye. Hey dude, I want to go play some video games.
Milkshakes and chocolate chip cookies? It would be an honor, Commander.
My drink, you can't have it. My drink. My girl. My homies. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I still love you! Lots of love. Oh, yes, dear. God bless us, everyone.
That is not at all what he said. And I am not repeating what he just said.
Okay, let's just sing the last song, shall we? Do you like this? Life leaves you high and dry, I'll be at your door tonight. You need help, if you need help, I'll shut down the city lights.
I'll lie, cheat, I'll beg and bribe to make you well, to make you well. You well.
When enemies are at your door, I'll carry you away from war.
If you need help, if you need help, you're hope dangling by a string, I'll share in your suffering to make you well, to make you well. Give me reasons to believe that you would do the same for me. And I would do it for you, for you. Baby, I'm not moving on. I'll love you long after you're gone. For you, for you. You will never sleep alone. I'll love you long after you go. And long after you're gone, gone, gone. When you fall, I can set you up. I'll be there to catch you, put you on your feet. You on your feet. And if your well is ever not a thing, then tell me what you need. What do you need? I surrender there honestly. You've always done the same for me. And I would I do it for you, for you. Stop it!
I see you! Okay, sing, honey. He's really good. I stare in my face. Brush when my legs stop moving.
You're my hair star.
You're my rugged heart. You're the toast that I'm pouring. Like a drum, baby, don't stop beating.
Like a drum, baby, don't stop beating. Like a drum, my heart never Don't stop beating for you, for you. Baby, I'm not moving on. I'll love you long after you're gone. For you, for you. You will never sleep alone. I'll love you long after you go. Like a drum, baby, don't stop beating. Like a drum, baby, don't stop beating.










