Monday Coaching Call Facilitated by Tracy Think Feel Act Cycle Sep 29 2025

So we try to keep this call a little condensed. So we're trying to keep it to about a half an hour. And it's called the Monday reset call. So the objective is truly just that, to just reset the week. Decide what it is that's important to you, what it is that you want to get done, how it is that you want to be thinking and feeling so that you actually get the results throughout the week that you're wanting. It's more about trusting the plan that you create and then proving it to yourself. That's what creates, like, a calm confidence, it creates clarity, and it creates empowered action. So it's a completely different approach to planning, time management, project management, than most people are used to. But. But nevertheless, it is an approach that we have found to be highly effective. So we offer it to all of our clients as a means of just like a springboard into your week. So I want you just to think about how it is that you are showing up today. Just answer that question for yourself. If you were to be using our planner, at the end of every week, we have what we call a weekly reflection page. So the planner is called Becoming Self Made. It's just a daily planner. It just literally helps you put pen to paper and make some big decisions about the next seven days. So at the end of every week, we have a weekly reflection that just helps you understand what worked well for you last week, what didn't work for you last week, and then what are you gonna do different this week? I like to start off every single day. As I'm, like, sitting down to do this work, I just ask myself, like, how am I showing up today? How am I feeling? What is it that I'm thinking? Those are really good pieces of awareness. I was working out this morning, and I was just kind of feeling like, ugh, I really don't want to be here. And I'm like, good Lord, do I have, like, the Monday blues or what? And that feeling is optional. That feeling is a choice. I don't have to feel that way. I could think, you know, this is, like, the start of a great fall week. There's so many things to look forward to today, but yet my unintentional brain, like the brain that just runs on autopilot, is going Monday. And then I'm feeling, like, kind of burdened and kind of, I don't know, grumpy. So asking yourself, like, heightening your awareness around, how is it that you're showing up today? What is it that you're feeling, and why is huge awareness. Now, the point is not to judge yourself. Truly, the goal of answering that question is just awareness, not analyzing. So maybe it's I'm feeling foggy and distracted. Oh, got somebody in the weight room here. Maybe you're feeling energized. But the thought is, but yet I'm pulled in too many different directions. Sorry. All of a sudden people are coming in. Good morning. Good morning. We're just starting off with the prompt of how are you showing up today? And we're answering that question without judgment. I would just want you guys to have a quick awareness of how is it that you're feeling and why? What is it that you're thinking? Are you thinking you're behind? How does that make you feel? Just naming the way you're thinking and feeling is so powerful because what you're aware of, you can actually influence. So at the end of every week, just as a quick recap, we always reflect what worked, what didn't work, what am I going to do differently? So if you are following along with the becoming self made day planner, making sure that either at the end of the week, at the start of the week, you give yourself the gift of that sort of data, like take account of what worked, what didn't work, and what you're gonna do differently or maybe even the same this week, the next step is I want you to reconnect with your 90 day goal. So in the front of the book we do a focus wheel like just what matters to you right now. And a lot of the men who are in dating with Gracie, what matters to them is changing their dating life. People who are in self made you, it might be their career, it might be their finances, it might be their physical environment, it might be personal growth, it might be health and wellness. So I just want you to ask yourself what matters to you right now? Or sometimes a better question is what area am I least satisfied with? Because that's going to point you in the direction of where it is that you might want to set some goals. And most of you know what your goals are, even if you haven't been through that exercise. If you're in the dating with Gracie community, you know what your goals are. You want to change your dating life. And I would encourage you to get really specific. Maybe it is something like you want to go on one date a week, two dates a month. Maybe it's you want to progress through some of the modules, get some one on one calls, be held accountable, it's your goals. But I want you to Always at the beginning of every single week. Reconnect. Reconnect. Is this still the right focus for you? What part of this goal or this vision am I most committed to? You might still feel strongly that losing 10 pounds is the goal, but maybe you are recognizing you also have a goal to save some money, pay down some debt, get a promotion at work.

And.

And through this exercise, through these questions, you're realizing, you know what? I need to simplify this. I've set too many goals at once, and it's making me feel overwhelmed. That's why we ask ourselves these questions at the start of every week. Sometimes your new awareness is around the commitment of finally being consistent with a morning routine. That morning routine, I promise you, it affects everything else. So if you don't know where to start, that's a great place to start. What is your morning routine? And when you're doing your weekly reflection, ask yourself, did my morning routine what it was that I was committed to? Sitting down and planning out my day with intention. How well did that work for me last week? Okay. From there, we want to set our priorities for the week. Okay. So we've heightened our aware awareness around what it is that we're bringing to the table today. We have revisited our goals every 90 days. You should be reestablishing goals. And I like for my clients to have a really strong focus, like, really laser focus, in on no more than, like, two areas of life and no more than four goals within those two areas. That's super important. Otherwise, the odds of you getting overwhelmed and distracted and really diluting some of the goals is highly likely. So now that you have reconnected with what those goals are, now you want to set some priorities. What are three types of wins that would be very doable and meaningful this week? What would stretch you just a little bit? Maybe stretch you a little bit out of your comfort zone? What actions are going to help you progress towards the goals that you've set or progress on what it is that you've already started or maybe get you over that finish line. What's one habit that would make the week feel very steady, very under control, very supported? So I want you to set some priorities. This is our weekly intention page. Set four of them. I think I might have said three. I meant four. And this is on the weekly intention page where it has the four goals. Goal 1, goal 2, goal 3, goal 4. If you don't have that page, that's not a problem at all. It's just this is a format that works for Everyone, whether you have this sheet in front of you or not, just set four priorities, four wins. That would feel very doable and meaningful for this week. Maybe it's prepping your meals for the week. Maybe it's walking 15 minutes. I had that one last week. Just getting outside. It's beautiful here in Minnesota. Getting outside for 15 minutes every single day. Or maybe it's planning out my day before checking my emails. Give you a minute. If anybody needs any help, feel free to ask. Grace, you want to offer some intention, some good intentions for the people that are in your group?

Yeah, I mean everybody's is going to be different. I think for the most part it's really deciding what, where you want your area of focus right now, what what is going to be most helpful to you and your dating goals right now. And so if just finding new places to meet women is one of your goals, maybe it's making a list of the different things that you like doing or want to try out or want to try for the first time. I think having a list like that is going to be helpful for you to actually then find the places in your area. So it's like kind of looking at it from a 10,000 foot view. What are the things that I enjoy doing? What are the things that I've maybe thought about doing? What are the things that maybe I do right now? But I don't do them in a social setting, I do them on my own. Right. Like if you're somebody that likes to read, maybe it's finding a book club or if you're somebody that likes to run, maybe it's finding a run club. Right. It's kind of taking the things that you enjoy doing right now, taking the interests that you already have and starting there. And then once we kind of exhaust those and find things for those that where you can actually start meeting women at, then we start looking at what are some new things that you would want to try, what are some new places that you want to try, what are some new social settings that you would be open to trying. So maybe that's an intention or a goal that you, you set out for this week. If you're trying out the dating apps for the first time or for the first time in a while, maybe it's watching the online dating course this week and then trying to implement two of the things from that course. Maybe it's working on your photos this week. Right. Maybe it's working on your messaging strategies this week. Really taking these things, especially if you're new to the dating scene or it's your first time in it for a while, taking them in more bite sized chunks, right? Like actually deciding this is the focus for this week instead of looking at it as a whole, looking at all the different things in the classroom tab of the community. Taking just one area to really put your focus on is going to be so much more beneficial than you going into the classroom and trying to watch all the courses and trying to implement everything all at once. Because it'll actually be doable and you'll be able to like actually see, okay, where are the areas that I need help with, where are the areas that I need to spend more time on and things like that.

Okay. And so for those of you who aren't in dating with Gracie, you probably have some maybe professional goals, some relationship goals, some physical environment goals. Maybe you're. It's fall and we're changing seasons. You want to get some organization in your house. Health and wellness goals, right? This is the page where we really break down into steps that are so easy it's almost hard not to do. This is where we break down those things so that we can now move into like a time blocking exercise. Where you are looking at the daily planner. So there's seven daily planners in this week. The first step is just to add the date, top right hand corner of each of your daily planners for the week ahead. Just quickly add the date so you kind of ground yourself in the week. So Monday, 929 is today, Tuesday, 9 30, Wednesday, October 1, Thursday, October 2, Friday, October 3, Saturday, October 4 and Sunday, October 5. Just ground yourself in the week ahead. Can you believe it? We are heading into a new month. Fall is truly here. Now I want you to look at those actions that you would have to take to make some progress on those goals and ask yourself, when exactly will I do this? Think about what usually gets in the way. How are you going to protect the time to get this done? What makes the most sense about committing to a specific time in the week to get these done? So I want to give you a couple minutes to literally just go line by line and start moving these actions that are going to get you closer to these goals onto the daily planners. Now if you don't have your whole week filled out and you don't even know where the white space is, but you know that by Tuesday I want to have made the pitch to my boss about the raise that I want. I want to make sure that that's done by Tuesday. You don't know exactly when that's going to fit in. Then that's what you write in the little daily to do box that's in the far left hand corner. Those capture the things that are going to get done before your head hits the pillow on that day. And it's only to be used if you don't know when to exactly schedule that in. So I like to just take a few minutes, look at my digital calendar, look at all the commitments that I've made, and transfer that into my goal planner, my daily planner. So today I have a 9:00am reset call, we've got a 2:00 call, and I've got a 6:00 clock commitment. So I have quite a bit of white space today. I know in that white space I'm going to be editing podcasts and working on looking over someone's homework and sending an email to a vendor. Those are in my daily to do's. I'm not exactly sure when I'm going to get those done, so I'm not blocking out the time, but I'm telling myself that before my head hits the pillow tonight, those things that are in my daily to do's will get done. It's not complicated. It's just a way to support yourself using this method. Now, looking at today, I want you to pick three events, three circumstances. It could be your 9am call, it could be your 2pm appointment, it could be a goal that you have, it could be somebody that you're going to be interacting with today. Just three different circumstances that are going to have an impact on your day today. Maybe it's just taking up some headspace, maybe it's an actual appointment, maybe it's a goal that you have. I just want you to pick three events. So on the right hand side of the page, under Thoughts and Feelings, that column, you're just picking three events. Put them in event one, event two, event three, and now go back to event one. And here's the part of your exercise that makes the most difference. I want you to decide, how do you want to feel at the point that you take on that event? So for me, my first event was editing the podcast. I'm not exactly sure what time I'm going to be doing that, but I asked myself, how do I want to be feeling when I go to edit that podcast? Here's the thing, you guys, if you don't ask yourself that question, your primitive brain takes charge and it does what it always does. It just follows a habit. It doesn't even feel like a habit. But your primitive Brain just runs on default, so it just thinks what it always thinks. And unfortunately your primitive brain is very fear based. So it's always scanning for danger and it always offers you fear based thoughts, limiting beliefs. That's what happens when you don't ask your brain to be intentional. So podcast edit for me is kind of like takes a lot of time, right? That feeling of like kind of heaviness is what unintentionally I would be feeling because I'm thinking takes a lot of time. I don't want to feel that way. I want this to actually be an enjoyable experience. So I write in this second space under event one. How do you want to feel? I want to enjoy. I want to feel joy. When I'm editing the podcast, what would I have to be thinking or believing to generate that feeling? Notice one way, one path is unintentional by default. The other path is intentional. And look at the contrast. One is heavy, one feels like joy. And it's just a choice. But you have to have the self awareness, you have to do the work to get there. And we support you with thoughts, suggested thoughts that create self made feelings in the front of the book on page 32 and 33. And maybe that joy is going to come from the thought that I'm constantly learning more about myself and more about the people that we're helping. And that's amazing. Like I rally around that thought which brings me joy as I'm editing the podcast. So doing the work, filling out those three events, picking just three events throughout your day, even if it's like sitting on the couch and reading a book, it sounds so insignificant. But why not decide how it is that you want to think and feel like? Maybe it's like you want to feel at peace while you're sitting down and reading the book. And maybe the reminding thought is, I'm so fortunate to have this time to carve out this time today, right? Be intentional doesn't have to be super significant events. Anybody have any questions? Go ahead, Dirk.

Not really a question, but the putting things into one hour blocks and focusing on that task for that hour really helped me last week because I was feeling overwhelmed because I had taken on too much trying to fill a new time gap in my life. And then when somebody would reach out and add the smallest task, my plate, I felt, you know, almost severely irritated because, you know, they feel that this is important, but they don't see what else is on my plate. And it's like, well, that's because you've taken on Too much. You need to focus on doing this for an hour. And after that, if you can move on to doing another task, great. If somebody needs something, then you can deal with that rather than, you know, just plan on doing something small for an hour.

Yep. And it doesn't even have to be an hour. Like some. Gracie and I did an exercise this weekend where we made the list of all the things that we needed to get done. And then we asked ourselves, how long does each one of these tasks take? And most of them were like 20 minute tasks. But it was super interesting because it was a pretty long list. And by the time we had like gotten to the end, we had like projected how long each task was going to take. Then I totaled it up and we were at like four and a half hours. And she's like, oh, I can only be here four hours. I'm like, all right, well, we don't know if those things are going to take 20 minutes, but we're kind of rallying around that and that's what we think. And it's super interesting to see how long things actually take. So doesn't have to be an hour. And when you do, like time block, I would also support yourself by turning off all notifications. If I was in a work environment with other people, I would do things to signal to the outside world that I am heads down and do not want to be disturbed. Whether if I have a door that I can close, if I can have ear pods or headphones to put on. So it just sends the signal, the message that I. I'm unavailable. I'm heads down. Like, do anything you can to support yourself during that time blocked period, no matter what, how much time it is. And you'll be amazed at how much more you'll get done when you support yourself on the front end. And then you're going to be able to in the future, like, be a little bit more accurate with the time now that you've learned how long it actually takes. And you'll also know, like, what else you're available to take on if you choose to. So thank you for mentioning that. I think that's a really good point.

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

Okay. So I like to, when I'm doing that, deciding how it is that I want to think and feel about these three events, I always kind of want to prove to myself the importance of this exercise. I really want to see the evidence. So I always ask myself, like, what was the old thinking? What was. What was I thinking before I decided to be intentional? Like the Old thought maybe is I never stick with anything. And the new thought is every time I come to a reset call, I get stronger. Or maybe your old thought is I'm behind compared to everyone else. And now your new thought is I'm moving at the pace that builds real results for me. Notice the difference, how different you feel believing those two thoughts. And it's a choice. So doing this work, just picking three events every day that you're going to be intentional in your thinking and feeling changes your day, it changes your week. It literally changes your life. So I highly encourage you to do this work. Write your, your new thoughts in a very visible place that you can come back to and remind yourself, our brains are not a vault. We treat them like vaults. And that's where we start to feel overwhelmed. They're. Our brain is a processor. So support yourself by writing things down, journaling, putting pen to paper. Now we've done one daily planner. I am confident that you'll be able to do the other days following today on your own. At the start of every day, I encourage you to do this work. Now, I want you just to look at your weekly to do list. It's probably blank right now. It precedes the daily planners. This is just a list of things that are non goal related. Booking the dentist appointment, sending that email to Michelle, dropping off bags at Goodwill, sending an outline to a client at some point during the week. It doesn't have anything necessarily to do with your goals, but it's taking up space in your brain. Again, our brains are not vaults, they're processors. So we want to keep a running list. I often look at last week's list and I just transfer the things that aren't, that haven't gotten done, that are still important to me. If it didn't get done, it's likely not that important to you. And so I would encourage you to either delegate it or delete it or schedule it at a better time. If it's not important to you right now, then it shouldn't really be on your list. But that's what that page is for. And then the opposing page, the brain dump page. This is your space to free write every single day. This is your space for self coaching. So like I asked you at the very beginning of this call, how are you feeling right now? How are you showing up? Those are the questions that I would ask myself every single morning. And instead of keeping it in your head, put it on paper. It allows you to kind of separate yourself. It allows you to stop making meaning of the feelings that you're experiencing because you see it on paper and it's like, oh, isn't that interesting? That's the vibration that goes through my body when I think that you can kind of put some space. So I highly encourage asking those very simple questions and writing the answer down. That's what I use that space for. And I just want to come back real quick. Want to kind of close the loop on who is it? What version of you are you choosing to be this week? Just this week. So many of us have really big goals and we think of ourselves way, way, way down the road as a different version of ourself from today. Who are you choosing to be this week and what action will prove that you are becoming that person? How can you prove that to yourself? Maybe it's I'm choosing to be the version of me who honors my word and I'll prove it by completing my workout every day this week. Or I'm being the focused version of myself and I'll prove it by turning off the notifications during my work blocks. During the time blocks. I'm the self made woman who resets every single Monday morning instead of spiraling. And I'll prove it to myself by sticking to my top three priorities today. Your brain loves evidence, you guys. And what makes you a self made person is by deciding ahead of time. Not waiting until the moment, not regretting your past, but deciding ahead of time who it is that you are becoming and how are you going to prove that to yourself. Any questions? This is how we reset every single week. Doesn't have to take a long time. Then from here it hopefully create some momentum and motivation to do this on your own at the start of every day. And then Monday we reconvene and we ask ourselves what worked? What didn't work? What am I going to do different next week? Okay, not in a punitive way, in a self aware way. In a way that helps us learn something about ourself. Any questions? All right, well that is our reset call now from here as you are progressing through your week and you're noticing obstacles are showing up because they will, they always do. And you're kind of feeling like ill equipped to handle those obstacles. Or maybe you're feeling rejected or lonely or incapable. Whatever the feelings are, bring them to your group coaching calls. So for self madeu we've got those on Wednesdays. For Dating with Gracie we've got them Tuesday nights. Thursday morning we've got tactical calls for the dating with Gracie crew. Join those Group coaching calls. Those are provided to you as a means to overcome the obstacles that show up during the week. That's what it's there for. All right. Hope to see you on one of those upcoming calls. And until then, take care.

Hey, Nick, before you jump, if you're still on, I just wanted to make sure that you knew where to find my message in school. Can you see the little direct message spot in the school platform, maybe? Looks like he's still on.

Yeah, I'm here.

Okay, awesome. It's so on the main community page, if you're looking at it from a desktop, it's in the top right corner. It's a little message icon.

Let's see.

I can share my screen, too, if it'll be.

I'm. I'm there now. Where is it?

Okay, so it's the top right corner. There's a little message icon. It should show that there's a message from me in there.

Yep.

Okay, perfect. So I sent you the link to the intake form in that message.

Perfect.

You want to just click on that quick and just make sure that it pops up for you.

Yep, it popped up.

Okay, perfect. Awesome. Just wanted to make sure.

No, I appreciate that.

Confusing.

I'll get this filled out right now.

Okay, perfect. Awesome. Thanks so much. I'll message you in there.

Sound great.

Okay, awesome.

All right, take care, guys.

Bye, guys.

Thank you.