136: The Enneagram in the Workplace: Helping everyone feel seen, heard, and understood

Foreign.

Welcome to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. I am your host, Tracy o'.

Malley.

I'm a mom to millennials, an author, Enneagram expert and multi million dollar entrepreneur.

And master performance and business coach.

I've gone from rock bottom to building a bulletproof business and life. If you're looking for the unfiltered transparent truth and even an extra kick in the ass, you will discover that here. Each week I'll be bringing you success stories of high level entrepreneurs as we discover how they became bulletproof and created their empire. You'll learn the story behind the glory along with Enneagram inspired truths so you can ignite your own purpose, profits and build your legacy. It's time for you to become bulletproof. Buckle up.

Let's go.

One of the biggest questions I'm asked about with the Enneagram has to do with team building and leadership. And honestly, you know, in, in the workplace or you know, entrepreneurship or anything, leadership. I mean you, you guys have heard me talk about leadership in your home as well. Like it's super, super important. But one of the things that I love about the Enneagram is it really gives you framework to not complicate things so much. And when we're dealing with all sorts of people, and if you're in a large organization or managing a large organization, trying to keep all that shit straight can be really overwhelming. And you know, one of the first places I used the Enneagram in leadership, first of all, was my home. And then in.

And when you have all different kinds of people with all different backgrounds and all different experiences coming at you to keep it all straight can get very challenging. And I think that's where so many of us, myself included in the past, have fallen into, like just doing it the way that we know how. And although that might work for us, or most of the time, it doesn't. To try and effectively lead from one frame of thinking, believing operating truly does not work. And I'm super passionate about helping teams and organizations.

Introducing the framework of the Enneagram and teaching others and leaders and management teams how to integrate this into their organizations and the workplace. Because when we're all kind of speaking the same language, even if we each have our own language, but when we can all understand the nine basic languages, languages of the Enneagram, and we're using this in the workplace, we have much greater capacity to make each other feel seen, heard and understood. We have a greater capacity to bring out the best in each other. There's less conflict, less turnover, less energy Bankruptcy going on. You get the. You get productivity. And all of that leads into higher profits, which, if we're in business, I mean, honestly, we want to make an impact and. And do good work in the world, but business is driven by, you know, profit and sales and all of that. And that's just the reality. And if you're a leader of an organization or part of an organization that believes that the framework of the Enneagram can definitely benefit you, please reach out to me. I have absolutely loved working with teams and organizations and seeing the light bulbs go off and the aha moments and just the amount of movement you can get in an organization when you can speak a language that others understand. And not only that, when whatever's in your heart and the message you're trying to express lands on whoever you're talking to, my goodness, are we way more effective? And one of the things, you know, that is the most challenging part when people come and want to work with me or have me work with their teams, is a lot of times I'm like, I just need you to fix my team, or, I want to use this in my team. And, you know, one of the biggest challenges is the hard work of leadership always begins with the most difficult person we will ever lead, and that is ourself. You know, it's funny because if you're familiar with the Enneagram.

You know, it can be confusing even if you know it. And at times, it can feel like a secret language. If. If you're one of those that is just brand new to hearing about the Enneagram, or you're stumbling upon my podcast and you're like, what the hell is this? It feels like some, like, secret society.

Just hang in there. It is. And it isn't complicated, but it is complex. But the more that you kind of dive in and understand, even just the basics, it will help you a long way with your communication. But people who do know about it quickly jump into this. I'm an eight, I'm a three. Or they'll say, I'm a three, wing two, or, you know, and that might lead you to say, like, I have no freaking idea what that means. And either you're intrigued by it, or you want to learn more about it, or even, you know, this is something you have to be careful of if you're doing all this. Any a talk around people. You don't want to make people feel excluded, right? Because it is a beautiful tool. But we don't want to turn people off from a resource and something that can Definitely help your team, your organization.

But the Enneagram is just a roadmap of self discovery and personal growth. You've heard me say that before. It's got ancient roots, but it recognizes nine very inherently different and yet connected. This is the cool part about it. We can be so different and so interconnected. Personality types that frame and describe, describe the why behind what you think, feel and do, not just the behaviors. Like, it's one thing when we correct behaviors or attempt to correct behaviors, but if we don't understand the why behind it, we're kind of just kicking the can down the street and we never get to the root of what's not working. So basically, this is the challenge of the Enneagram. And there's a few, obviously you've heard me talk about, like mistyping. And if you're going to use this tool, having the right information is key. But one of the other inherent challenges of the Enneagram is that nothing with it is very brief. Right? It's not just like, hey, let's do like a quick study or watch a webinar or you know, even listen to my podcast and you know, you got this and all my threes out there, you know, because I work with a lot of threes. They want to know what book to read and how to implement this in all areas of their life so that they can achieve super success or help others do the same. But it takes time to understand. It's not just understand, but it takes even more effort to utilize this as a leader. That being said, is it worth it? Hell yes. And even so, I am convinced, seriously, that it is a proven leadership tool for individuals and teams to lead themselves better. I've been at this over a decade, using it first on myself, then in my family, then in my leadership teams, and then helping thousands and thousands of you do the same. But like I said, the hard work always begins with you. You know, you can't give what you don't have. And the ability to have your own self awareness will not only allow you to have awareness of the root of what motivates people, but you'll also have compassion for them and be able to effectively lead them from the very thing that motivates them. Them. So here's the thing. If you're looking for a quick fix or some, you know, magical wand strategic process to grow your own leadership and the impact your team can make, this might not be the tool for you. This is going to take time. And it's. It's got some muscles to it. And you don't just go from working out a muscle to the Olympics in one day. It's a process. It's more like a long road trip that happens one mile at a time. And if you don't understand how to read the map, you can get completely turned around, you can get lost. Or if you got a shotgun rider, you might get into a fight about the exit you just missed. Right? So why does this matter for leaders? So you know, I've said this before on many recordings and podcasts, whether it was my own or somebody else's, that, you know, if you can't lead yourself, you won't be able to effectively lead other people. And the most important person you'll ever lead is yourself. So every leader has to first lead themselves. And the Enneagram will help you as a leader grow in your self awareness by understanding the why behind what you think, how you feel and the ways you behave. And the wisdom of the Enneagram is that it gives this beautiful, specific, understandable language and a very precise description to nine different ways people show up. So if you think about it, there's millions and billions of people in the world, but if you know you have framework of a basic nine different ways people show up, it makes thing it makes this a hell of a lot easier. And its language describes how you experience the world and how others experience you in the world. And that is also why it also matters when you're dealing with teams. So when individuals are willing to do the hard work of understanding who they are and why they do what they do, they will also begin to understand who others are and why they do what they do. Like I said, leadership always begins with an individual leader and their willingness to lead themselves for the sake of others. The Enneagram is important for teams because it can tell you what gifts you have and what others have and what's missing. Missing on our team. This was one of the most powerful things in building a large organization that's now upwards of over 110,000 people. I had a hand in building seven, seven figure income earners on that organization. And out of those, 75 different Enneagram types are represented. And not one of them is my basic type. So really having a diverse team in your organization, in any industry is super important. Important because we, we each in our nine basic Enneagram types have a superpower. And having somebody lean into theirs. You know, me trying to have a superpower that let's say a five or six has, it takes a lot more energy resources, which keeps me out of my zone of genius. And so this is why this is really important for teams. And using this in teams, in my approach to the Enneagram, I find that the names of the nine different types also tell us so much. It's like, what gifts does each type bring to the world? What dynamic tension are they always trying to resolve? Like, what's their internal struggle? And the ones that they usually kind of bring into their life and project in other areas of their life. Like I said, each. Each number, and each type has a superpower, which is both a leadership gift and a task to manage. If you've been listening for any length of time, I've told you all, like, each Enneagram type has a superpower. And when it's coming from love, compassion, empathy, service, and grace, it's a superpower. But that same superpower can also be this wrecking ball in our life, right? And if it's coming from. If. If the motive is coming from fear, insecurity, doubt, guilt, shame, ego, pride, that same superpower can turn into a wrecking ball. And myself, you know, as an 8, my intensity is my superpower. It really, really is. It makes people feel. Feel supported and protected and safe and like, holy shit, if o' Malley says she's got your back, she's got your back. When it's coming from, you know, the positive parts of me, when I'm in a not so great place and feeling insecure or, you know, whatever, you know, is not good for my soul, that same intensity can destroy anything in its path, and it has. And so understanding that that gift will also be your blind spot and a task to kind of keep an eye on, just sign up for it, say, I'm here for it, and know that it's always going to be there.

One more thing. There's a variety of names to the nine different types, and I've used many along the way. And I like showing the. The dynamics of each type and the wide range that each one has a skill set in. And I thought I would take you through. So if you're a team leader and this is maybe one of your first episodes, I like to bring new elements when I describe each personality type to each episode, because I think sometimes we need to hear things different ways or even repetitive so that it can kind of stick. Because I want you to think about the people you lead and even those that you love in your own home and really understanding, okay? So even though these behaviors of certain types might trigger you, when you understand what's at the Root of it, not only do you have more patience and compassion, but you're able to help bring out their, their superpowers. When you speak to them in a way that really makes them understand that you get them right. When I get people tell me it's like you're talking to me or I feel like you see me. That is one of the biggest compliments you can get, right? Because that means you, you have tapped into the very thing that drives them, the very thing that keeps them up at night, the very thing that they work to protect most of their life. And when you make someone else understand that, you see that and that you have their back too, or will help them maybe not be so afraid in leadership and stepping into their greatness. I'm telling you, you're able to bring out the best in people and that is some of the best leadership there is. All right, so we'll go through them real quick for some of you that are new to the game or just need to hear this again. You know the ones on the Enneagram, they are called the moral perfectionists. They're called the improvers, sometimes called the reformers. Sometimes some of their traits are they're very principled, purposeful, self controlled, perfectionistic at times. But everything they look at, they look at life through the lens of.

What is wrong and how can I make it better? Like they, that's why I call them improvers all the time. They look at anything. It's why, you know, they can get stuck in this. But how can we make it better? How can we make it better? So if you're dealing or leading a one knowing that a lot of times they're not going to be satisfied, they might be a little critical of themselves and sometimes outwardly and so really.

Reassuring them that the work that they're doing is beautiful.

And that you appreciate them will go a long, long way. The twos on the Enneagram, the supportive advisors, the helpers, they're super generous. They're the people connectors. They're the relationship builders. They're the ones that go out of their way to take care of others needs. They, they genuinely can sense what people need. So they can be very generous of their time, resources, heart. They're demonstrative, loving, hospitable. And everything they look at, they, they see where to help out and where they can say yes to make a situation better.

You know, they can be over givers. So really encouraging them to ask for what they need if you lead them because they, they won't a Lot of the time. Or they might have some resentment because they can kind of read what people need. They low key, kind of expect others to be able to read their mind. And so letting them know, like, I want to serve you, I want to help you, but I cannot read your mind. It is your superpower, but it is not mine. And so when you can get a two to ask for what they need before they're angry or feeling unappreciated, this is where they will really step into their best leaders.

Now, the achievers, the successful achievers, very adaptable, excelling, driven, efficient, and they get stuff done 24 7, 365. And they're always shooting for the goal line. You want something done, achieved, you want a goal crushed. They are the people you call when you're leading them, though. Like they want to be successful, they want to appear like they've got everything, like they're going to make everything okay. But what can happen is, is they can bulldoze through things, they can bulldoze people their health. And so really having them kind of slow down sometimes so that they can speed up will be really, really important. Their, their whole worth when they're, you know, not at their highest form, their whole worth is in what they do, what they achieve, how they appear. And we don't want to feed into that as their.

Praising them for the energy, the heart they bring to things, not just what they achieve or how they appear, will be really, really important. If you're leading one, and especially if you have one in your team, you might want to overly lean on them because you know that they'll crush it and move the bottom line. But if you want them to go the distance and not burn out, then you're going to have to know how to have them slow down, to speed up without pissing them off, because they don't like to slow down very much. The fours, my romantic individualists, they are the storytelling creatives. They make the world beautiful. They're very expressive, authentic, creative, introspective. They look at everything and how they can make the world and its people beautiful. They have the widest range of emotions. They need to feel all the things to feel alive. They're one of the most misunderstood on the Enneagram because they feel all the things at all the times. They can seem all over a place, all over the place, but it's very, very real for them. And knowing this about them, a lot of times people can say they're too much or they don't know how to deal with that especially in the workplace when, you know, shit's got to get done or whatever, we don't have time for emotions. But quite honestly, the emotions are what drives people. And not just the fours, but everyone. And so they provide a very safe place for other people to feel. They can hold without judgment. They don't get rattled by intensity. So that's something that is beautiful when, when things can get heated in leadership and business, the fours really can hold that space. When they're at their best. If you lead a four.

Really working hard to see them and understand them. Because a lot of times the four feels like something's missing in them. They think that they're on this constant quest to find out what's missing in them. And so a lot of times they don't even lean into their own beaut gifts because they, they're on this, this journey to find what's missing. And if you're leading them, really pouring greatness into them and encouraging all the. The beautiful qualities about them will be something that brings out the very best in them. Great storytellers, they, they make the creative genius in them.

It's sad that so often because people don't want to take the time to deal with the energy they bring to the table. We're missing a lot of the blessings that they can bring to the world. So be patient with the fours. They are incredible and they will make you feel things that maybe you need to feel or are afraid of. The Fives on the Enneagram, my investigating thinkers. They are your analytical people. They are perceptive, innovative, curious, objective. They are the genius of things. So if you have something that needs to be researched and studied inside and out, these are your people. They don't like to work in big groups and so don't push them to do that. You won't get the best out of them. Don't push them to be like, you know, the organizer of anything like community related. That's not their zone of genius. Give them a task to go down a rabbit hole about and they are your person and they will master and understand all of it. They observe, think, and then think some more. Sometimes you have to ask them what they're thinking because they, they hold on to and hoard their genius sometimes and their resources and their energy because they want to make sure they're always equipped and capable. So asking them about things that interest them will build trust with them that you actually give a shit. It's really, really cool to have a Five. I've. I've said this before. Like if I had to pick one Enneagram type to have, phone, a friend card, it would probably be a five, a healthy five. Because they know their shit. They do. And I have just a deep understanding of the need for some solitude. But to get them to feel will be really, really important. As their leader or somebody that brings out the best in the five. You want them not just leaning into information, but their own instinct, because a 5 goes into an 8 in their growth pattern. So instead of being wrapped up in.

Having them lean into their decisive muscle and the discernment muscle and kind of going off that instinct instead of just data and analytic analytics will be really, really important to bring out the best in your five. All right, My Sixes, the loyal guardians, the loyalists, sometimes they're called, I call them the master troubleshooters. They are your best collaborative partners, mainly because they want to make sure everybody's kind of doing their thing. They're very engaging, super responsible, super prepared, very practical. They're hands down the most reliable and consistent on the Enneagram. Having one of these people on your team are everything.

My best friend is a six. And honestly, it has been life changing having an enneagram6 in my back pocket. You know, they ask a lot of questions and in the past, I would have been a terrible leader to a Six or a terrible friend to a six because I'm such a decisive, kind of go in hot person that I sometimes, depending on how the questioning comes from them, I would sometimes take it as disrespectful or don't you think I got this? Or are you trying to slow me down? If you are leading a Six, let them ask all the questions. They are not being insubordinate. They have this divine need for certainty and they need never want to be blindsided. Certainty, security, safety, support is everything to them. It's their lifeblood. And so let them ask questions. And really important to not make them feel like they're too much because they, they will keep your organization and team safe. They will keep it very collaborative and efficient. If things come up that are unexpected, they have it, they have a plan for it, which is huge for me because I just don't even think of things sometimes and I just go in hot. So be patient with the questioning and, and the need for certainty from your loyalists, you'll. You'll bring out the very best in them. And when they are able to be certain that things are handled, they can bring all their genius to life. All right, my sevens, the enthusiasts, the entertaining optimists, the visionaries, they're super spontaneous and versatile, confident. They bring excitement to things. They don't want to be trapped in any situation or pain. But these guys, they can pivot at the drop of a hat. They're like, anything's possible, super optimistic. They have more ideas and energy than anyone. They don't have an off button. So when you get a seven that you're leading, know that they're gonna, like, come at you like a fire hose with ideas. Do they believe that all of them have to happen? No. But you have to let them brain dump. And I had to learn this the hard way because I'm leading one in my own home and understanding that my eight brain doesn't have to go into tactical strategic Mode When a 7 is firing at me with all these ideas, just let them get it all out. And you, like I'm telling you right now, if you're leading a seven, when you hear some of the things that they come up with, they are what change the world and bring innovation to life. But because they can get a bad rap for being all over the place, sometimes they're not taken seriously enough and their ideas kind of get pushed to the side, and my God, just let them get it all out. Something golden is going to come out of their brain, their ideas, their mouth. Give them the respect they deserve because they do change the world. All right, my fellow eights out there, the protective challengers, they can be difficult to lead. They will be testing to make sure that you can handle things. If you are their leader, they want to make sure that you actually can handle things. And so we can kind of push the envelope or challenge people, ask. Ask certain questions, put you on the spot, try to back you in a corner to see if you can handle it. We want you to go toe to toe with us as eights, but our intensity can kind of even have. Have some of the strongest leaders out there back down. The traits of the eight are super self confident, decisive. They can be very compassionate, super resilient. The eights are who you want to take to a fight or who you want to take to close a deal.

You Definitely want an 8 in your life because if all hell's breaking loose, the AIDS got it and they're not afraid.

Having them understanding their intensity and.

How it might affect others even before they open their mouth will be something that's really important for them to understand. But in order for them to receive that kind of leadership from you, they have to trust you. So your word is everything to an 8. Not only is your word. Everything. The actions must back it up. Otherwise, your words don't mean jack and you will never have their respect. And then it makes it very hard to bring out the very best in them. And they can be a little destructive if that's what's going on. All right, finally, the nines, the peacemakers, the peaceful mediators. These are your Yodas. When they're healthy, they are super collaborative as well. They're inclusive, they bring community together. They're receptive, reassuring, generous, very diplomatic.

They really want people to get along. Sometimes in their dysfunction, they can enable that, but because they can be the voice of reason, these guys are really great to have conflict resolution. And they do it in such a way that just, you know, is a true testament to their name that brings just such peace to the situation.

So all the different nine types matter. And when you have a little bit of all of them in a leadership team or an organization.

My goodness, people can just land in their zone of genius all the time and not try to pick up the slack in areas that, you know, we can do that. And ideally, we'd love to be able to embody all of them, but for us to be in our sweet spot all the time will keep us from being energetically bankrupt. And then we can bring our greatest contributions to any team, business and organization. So you can see how, you know, bringing the integration of the Enneagram into leadership and organizations, it's so valuable. And when you only have to really focus on the nine basics and the ins and outs of it and really being committed to understanding it at a deeper and deeper level and not just like, say, okay, yeah, I know I've got a 3 in XYZ. It's more complex than that. It's not complicated, but it is complex. And. And really, when you are able to bring this into your organization, there's a lot less guessing going on. And when you don't have to guess, you can do what you're here to do, which is make an impact within your organization or business. And if you are somebody that runs a team in any industry and you want to bring out the best in your people or you want your people to be so cohesive together and even though they may not always agree, but know how to communicate that with each other, please reach out at my website@tracy omalley.com the work with Me section. I can customize any kind of.

Workshop, organization, training, coaching within any business or organization that will bring out the very best in in you and your team. And also help you achieve what it is you're looking for in that. Also, I, I work with families, all sorts of things. It's. The home team is one of the most important teams that you'll ever have. And you know this all started within my home team and I'd be honored to do that with you and yours as well. You can reach out and find me on Instagram at Tracy Underscore o' Malley and like I said, the most important leader that you will ever need to understand is you. And you will also be your biggest challenge. And I do individual typing sessions and even if you've taken an online assessment, they are inaccurate 65 to 70% of the time. And if you want to use this tool, the right information is key and we can go through a good solid 90 plus minutes. I tend to go over time a lot and just give you everything. I've got a one on one individual typing session where we go through the ins and outs and really nail down what your type is so that you can be the best leader of yourself and in turn bring that into every person you touch. I've done hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of typing sessions and it's beautiful when you get to see you at your core in a way that maybe you haven't before and, and then be able to use that information so that things aren't so confusing and you can and step into the greatness and the calling that has always been on your life and it doesn't have to be as hard as you're making it. And I'd be honored to take you on that journey. Like I said, reach out Tracee Underscore o' Malley or just go to my website. You can, if you know you want to do the typing session, just go right now tracy o'malley.com the work with me section and just sign up and do this. It's. It's a beautiful process and I, I just want to say thank you. I get messages every day and this podcast is really resonating with so many of you and I know there's so many information teachers of the Enneagram out there and they're amazing. But I appreciate.

You telling me how much understanding how to integrate this in your life and using this beautiful, powerful tool in your life is changing everything for the better. It means a lot to me. I take this work very, very seriously. It is what I'm so passionate about so that you make the impact wherever you were called to do. And I'm honored to be with you on the journey. It means the world to me. If you are loving this podcast and the information and integration that you're learning about. It would mean the world to me if you went to itunes, maybe shut down a review. Even if you hate it. I'm cool with that too. I'm all open for feedback always. And if you're loving this episode, share it with somebody that maybe needs to hear it. You can tag me on Instagram at tracyomali and coming soon. Welcome to this podcast. We're switching it up a little bit and there's going to be live typing sessions on air. You're going to hear more from people that I have taken through an Enneagram experience and how this this information and integration has made an impact on their bottom line in their businesses and in their home team as well. And until next time, here's to Becoming Bulletproof.

Thank you for tuning in to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. If you learned a thing or two from our show today, it would mean a lot to me if you shared it and tagged me so I can hear exactly what landed on your heart. This will help me to bring you even more episodes with the topics and guests you want. Please head over to itunes and leave an honest and loving five star review. If this made an impact on you, you can find me on Instagram at tracy tracyomalley and I have tons of free resources for you@traceeomalley.com as always, if you are wanting to ignite your purpose, profits and build your legacy, it's time to stand on the front line of your life and do the work. Let's become Bulletproof.