53: Unleashing your soul through movement with Tara Romano

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Welcome to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. I am your host, Tracy o'. Malley. I'm a mom to millennials, an author, Enneagram expert and multi million dollar entrepreneur, and master performance and business coach. I've gone from rock bottom to building a bulletproof business and life. If you're looking for the unfiltered transparent truth and ethos, an extra kick in the ass, you will discover that here. Each week I'll be bringing you success stories of high level entrepreneurs as we discover how they became bulletproof and created their empire. You'll learn the story behind the glory along with Enneagram inspired truths so you can ignite your own purpose, profits and build your legacy. It's time for you to become bulletproof. Buckle up. Let's go.

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. And I have one of my favorite people in the entire world that I am bringing you today. We've been part of the same network marketing company now for over seven years and we knew of each other, but it's been the last two or three years that we really, it's like our souls met and then we got into a room together and it was like two little Chatty Cathys that just could not break free, free from each other. And I knew, I knew that I would fall in love with her. And when I got to know her.

She did not disappoint, that's for sure. I've got Tara Romano with us today. She's an entrepreneur, performer, teacher, and she is definitely a personal development junkie and she's a Jersey girl. I love the east coast girls. For some reason, I don't know what it is. It's like a little Chicago meets East Coast. It's just a match made in heaven. But what I, when I first met her, even though we do the network marketing thing and we love it and passionate about it and believe in that as a business model and as a tool and resource to really help you change your life. The thing I was most fascinated by her with, she does Zumba, right? And if you don't know what Zumba is, it's like this dance fitness thing. And if you know me at all, I pretty much am the worst dancer ever. The only time I could ever dance is when I was drinking like a pitcher of margaritas. And since I haven't drank in about eight years, like my dancing skills are pretty limited. And I have a daughter that is very into dance and into Zumba and all of that. And I'm fascinated. I love, I Never get tired of watching people dance, especially when it just oozes out of them that soul. And Tara does that. I literally go down the scroll hole of watching all of her YouTube videos, all of her Instagram videos, because there's something powerful about movement and moving your body this way. And, you know, in talking to her over the last few years, understanding why she is so passionate about it and how that's even evolved over the last almost decade now, and how it's moved from just teaching classes in a gym to creating a movement through movement. And Tara Romano is here today, and you're going to learn and love and laugh with us. And I'm so excited to bring her to you because I'm sure this is going to be a real juicy conversation about love and life and all that in between. So, Tara, welcome to the show.

Thanks, Tracy. That was such a great introduction. I just love you so much. I feel like we should have pressed record, like 40 minutes ago when we got together, because that was just a great conversation, too.

Well, we never don't have a great conversation, so, you know, that was. That was our girl time. So I'm sure that whatever comes out of your mouth today, and my mouth will be exactly what somebody needs to hear, so. Hi.

Hi. I'm so happy to be here. I, like, literally love chatting with you. I feel like time just goes.

I know. We've been chatting for 40 minutes before we hit record. I was like, holy shit, we better get this started.

I know. I'm like, I gotta get some more water.

Yeah, we're busy girls. So for those of the audience that maybe don't know who you are, you know, I basically gave a little rundown. But if you were to tell people who Tara Romano is, what would you tell them?

Oh, my gosh, that's such a great question. I'm just gonna give you a Reader's Digest version. I'm like, I feel like I really am a girl next door who has a lot of grit, a lot of heart, and just shows up.

In every which way. I show up in my relationships, I show up in this world, in my work, and, you know, I'm just like always wanting to learn and learn more, be more. I know that sounds a little woo woo, but it's just the truth. Like, if I could just sum myself up and I honestly, it's so interesting that you mentioned network marketing, because I feel like 10 years ago when I was introduced to what network marketing was, that's where the personal development came. I didn't know what Personal development was aside from like the self help aisle and the bookstore and like, Maybe, maybe your Dr. Phil show makes it. I remember my sister giving me a Marianne Williamson cassette tape when I was 19, which was like, what, 23 years ago when we listened to cassette tapes and I just couldn't really follow it. My mind, I don't think, was mature enough to, or ready enough to understand those kind of teachings. And now it's like she's just my go to all the time, right?

And, you know, one of the things I love most about you and this is, you know, we were talking earlier about love languages and enneagram and horoscopes. We're going down the whole thing of personality and what that is. And, you know, my love language is quality time. And anytime I am with you, I feel like in the world nothing else matters to you but me, who is right in front of you. And you have that beautiful ability with every person you come in contact with. And it is a gift. And, you know, you are sandwiched in between a bunch of siblings, right? You've got. There's a whole crew of Romanos. And I know, like, because you're such an observer and empath, you really, really are. You can really put your thumb on the pulse of what's needed in any given situation. And yes, 20 something years ago, maybe you weren't ready to receive or mature enough in your brain to do that, but I think, you know, a decade or two later, here you are using those gifts that you had as a child even in that family, you know, kind of watching everything kind of play out the way it does. Right? And so 10 years ago, you get introduced to network marketing and know by your sister. Mm, yes, she went first. And, and I know her story too. Like, she was not like the ideal person at the time to get into it, but when she starts it and, you know, introduces it to you, what's your first thought? Like, do you think you can even do this? Or what is your. What is your thought? Because I know there's a lot of people in network marketing or looking at network marketing, especially right now with what's happening in the world. Like, somebody like you is like, yeah, I'm paper. I'm least likely to do this.

Yeah. And for whoever is listening, I just want you to listen closely because I truly feel whether it's network marketing or whatever it is that you want to do, like, you actually can do that thing. I'm really just a very average person with just a lot of work ethic. So my Sister actually gifted me the program of the company that I'm in for Christmas because I actually wanted nothing to do, like I didn't want anything to do with what she was selling me. And I also couldn't afford it at the time. So we're going back 10 years ago. I was 32, I went back to college for health and phys ed. So I was going to college more than full time. I had 19 credits, I was working full time as a bartender and I was teaching literally like 20 classes up and down two counties. So I was a worker. So she gave me the program because she was concerned about my health. I was a very much do as I say, not as I do fitness instructor where like meaning that I would teach like three classes after like drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee and then coming home, stopping at 7:11, grabbing a pre made sandwich and chips and calling it a day, you know.

So I tried the program. My results were ridiculous. Like I was in jeans that I hadn't worn since high school. And I remember calling my sister, I'm like, I don't know what this is, but like I feel amazing. But still, even after that like I just used the products and she always was telling me about the business. But I'm like, Lex, my sister's name is Alexis. Call her Lex. I'm like, I'm trying to finish school, I'm trying to finish college. I'm bartending, I can barely make ends meet, I'm teaching classes. Like I don't have time for this. Like I do not have time. So she would just like send me random emails and stuff like that. And I remember just like having a folder for everything she sent me and I'm like, it was just annoying. So yeah, I just like I had the Alexis folder.

So you know, I said I wound up graduating college and I was looking for a health and phys ed job and I was more than qualified. I had an electronic portfolio and back then that was like something electronic portfolio 10 years ago. So I just really was waiting to get a job. I couldn't wait. But after, after two years I still couldn't find a job. I was still bartending, which would have been fine if I hadn't been in the restaurant industry since I was 10. So it was a long time and I was just ready to do something I was really passionate about. So during all of this, Zumba came around and I started teaching Zumba. And for those of you who don't know what Zumba is, Google it because it's so fun. And I laugh at you when, Tracy, when you said you can't dance. I think everyone can move their body. Absolutely. And that's a lot of what else we'll talk about later. But I remember just starting that Zumba and then not getting a job and then finally listening to my sister about, oh, this is specifically what had happened. It was a Saturday night, and I was still bartending, and I called my sister crying, which was not, like, uncommon because I would always call her. And I was upset because I was still in the same place that I had been. And she's like, I'm so tired of you crying. Do something different, or you can find someone else to cry to. So I decided I would give network marketing a look. And then I committed after that to start getting on calls, going to events, and the events are what really changed my life. Like, I didn't even really still know what network marketing was, but I went to these events, and people were telling me I could do, be, or have anything I wanted. And I'm like, nobody ever told me that before. It's just not. You know, our parents believed in us, but it was not something that we spoke about. So, yeah, so that's kind of like the start of where that. That came from.

So you get into it, and obviously you start to have success. And, you know, I know that for me, I was the same thing with personal development. I had just started a recovery when I started in network marketing. So I was exposed to, like, books. Like, I thought it was like, books on the aisles, too. And I was like, whatever, you know, and all those things other than Dr. Phil. I love Dr. Phil, too. But I know that when we get into it and we, like. I remember sobbing, like, literally when I was making the decision to say, okay, if I'm going to do this, I'm doing it with network marketing, right? And that means stripping ourselves of an old identity. That means knowing that shit's gonna be said about us, because it's one of those things, right? And I also was in the restaurant industry for decades as well. So, you know, when we get into that, and I know there's a lot of you listening right now that are, you got one toe in and one toe out of network marketing. And that's possible to do, like, obviously. But if you want to be do and have everything you want and have the true residual and all of that, it's going to require you to, like, take off the clothes, go naked, and jump right in. And, you know, as we are in it, all of a sudden, I think a lot of us, I don't know anybody that hasn't been like, all of a sudden you're like, oh, shit, I don't have my whole life figured out right now. And you're dealing with all different kinds of people that aren't like, you necessarily. Like, that's the beautiful thing about network marketing is anybody can do it. And that's also like, the hard part about network marketing is anybody can do it. And so you're having to navigate all these different personalities, right? And you realize, like, some of your old limiting beliefs come to the surface as you're doing this, even as you're having success, right? So when you're starting this and you're being exposed to personal development, were you afraid of it or were you like, give me more?

So it's so interesting. I. When I first started this, I, like, I didn't know that people were going to defriend me. I didn't know that people were going to have any judgments or anything like that. I honestly, like, I really was that saying ignorance on fire. I had my head down because as I started network marketing, I also was starting Zumba. And I remember, so. So again, I just. I never had less than. I never had less than three jobs actually. The last year I had W.2 forms. I literally had seven. So I was doing. No, no joke. I was doing so many different things, and I am. So I was just doing. And I also started a YouTube channel sharing my Zumba choreography. So, like, I'm doing all these new things and I was just doing. And like, yes, like, I started to post a little bit more on social media, positive sayings. And that's kind of where I got the backlash from some friends. And I remember just like, not understanding, like, my friends are like, you're changing. Of course. Of course I'm changing. Like, I'm learning all these amazing things. So I still just. And I. I truly feel. Because my sister has been my mentor. I mean, even before the business, like, I had so many things to do that I just didn't have time to listen to the noise and thank God. Yeah, right. And it took quite some time to even get any success for me. Like, I. I was doing the business probably for like a couple of years before I even earned anything because I wasn't really fully in it because I was doing so many things. And yes, my. All my stuff was coming up because I was. I'm too busy or like, I can't do that. But I just would keep trucking along, messaging people I was really messy in the beginning, right. But, like, I just wasn't looking at anyone else or what anyone else was doing. And I have to say, between everything that I have done, like, anything I did in the past, like, when I started my YouTube channel, when I started Zumba, when I started network marketing, I really just was looking at other people truly as inspiration. It wasn't until after the success, then I started to get into my head, like, almost thinking, like, oh, no, well, what if, like, you know, what if I can't keep this? Or what if I can't sustain this? And things like that. So I feel like I started really working on myself and understanding more personal development as time went on, because I was just so excited of even understanding what it was like. I would go to these events and people were so nice to me and they were so supportive. And I was like, what is this? Is this, like, some kind of, like, cult or something? And I laugh now even thinking about it, but it, like, I wish they taught that stuff in school, right? Like, I mean, omg, there's a lot of people in my businesses that are even older than I am now that have never been around it. And, you know, I'm just so, so grateful because it's helping me in all areas of my life. I mean, hence, like, you know, why. How we even didn't connect because of network marketing was really afterwards in the mastermind, I feel like, is where we really got to connect.

Yeah, it's interesting that you said what you said. Like, when I made the decision to start it too, I pretty much wiped out everybody anyway, so I was kind of ignorant, on fire. And I think it's when we actually start to have success. And this is the thing I think people are. There's a lot of us that are more afraid of success. And what that means as far as sustainability and what people might think versus even fear of failure. I'm not afraid of failure because anytime I failed, I come up and rise up way better. But my belief about success, I mean, I saw success as power and I saw it be abusive at times growing up. And so I know, like, I've dumbed it down a little bit at times, even yesterday. Like, I find myself doing that sometimes based on experiences. And I love that you really just. You're gritty, your head down, you can do this. And trust me, if she and I can do this, anybody can do it. But what, like, you're right. Like, we've been in the same circle for four years, but it wasn't until after we both are, like, doing other things as well, that we really connected. And I've been following you for a long time because of the Zumba, not because of what you did in network marketing, but because I could see, like, obviously you're you. You're authentic. You show up as you. But there is something that happens my. When you dance. And, like, I'm getting choked up just thinking about it, because I think there is that part of us, in all of us that. I mean, it's still authentic to who you are, but there's this. This fun side. This. This extra, like, doesn't give a fuck about what anybody thinks or says or even what I think or say. Like, you just go out and you are like that. I think when you dance. And this is so true, like, and this is like, with my thing with the Enneagram, it's like, I'm not teaching you to be anything that you're not. We're just getting you back to who you always were before life got a hold of you. And when I see you dance, that is what I see. I see Tara before the world got ahold of her and before anybody started putting things into her head or she started putting things into her head. And I know that you started teaching Zumba and it kind of started because you needed to come up with something, right. To get into a gym to teach. Right? And that's kind of how it started for you.

Well, Zumba. Zumba is not my creation. That was. I just remember when I. When I saw it, like, I was like, oh, my God, what is this? And so I had started to. I had started to teach that for a few years, and then what. What had happened was the gym that I kind of grew up in, so to speak.

I was teaching other things, other. Other than Zumba. But, like, it's so funny because I was never a dancer ever. Like, my mom told me I would throw a. When I was five years old, when I was ready to go to dancing school. So I just thought that was always so funny. But so I left the gym I kind of grew up in because they wouldn't let me teach anywhere else in the surrounding area. I was only teaching three classes. They wouldn't give me any more classes, and they wouldn't give me a raise. So they literally put a cap on my passion and my income. So in order for me to. There was this new place to actually write, kind of right by where I'm living right now. And you had to audition to.

Work there. And the audition was creating A new format of whatever it was. And I'm like, create a new format. I'm like, what do you mean? I'm like, okay. So then she was explaining into it. So I went home, like, I have to create a new format of dance or fitness. So I went on to. I just googled them. I think it back then it was like, ask Jeeves. Do you remember Ask Jeeves? Like, it wasn't Google. Yeah, it was like, so funny. I vividly remember this. And I was like, I found Crunch Fitness and on the Crunch Fitness website. Now, if you know Crunch Fitness, they have tons of different classes of fitness and dance, and they're very original and creative. So there was this one class called Strip Bar. Now it was this amazing man with a body bar. Sexy dance fitness on this body bar. And I'm like, what is this? So I'm like, this is so cool. And, like, I just loved his movement. Like, I could see him right now. And I'm like, this is cool. I'm like, what if I did this with, like, a chair? Or what if I did this with, like a towel? Like, sexy dance fitness. So tone and tease was created. It was basic dance and fitness moves with a sexy edge and easy to follow format that anyone could do. So I started teaching this class. I had no idea what I was doing, but people liked it and they were having fun. And, like, then everyone started to, like, get dressed up a little bit. And then we, like, started wearing heels. And then I started adding affirmations. And then, you know, from my YouTube channel, I had been traveling all over the United States and then in other countries teaching my Zumba choreo. Then I started teaching, like, tone and teeth too. And I'll never forget my first. It was California I went to, and I walked into a room of 70 women, and they were like, their arms were crossed.

Yeah, that would be me. That'd be me. Like, terrified. Like, shit, what's she gonna make me do?

So now I'm coming in there, like, with these thigh high boots, hair down, like. But nobody really, nobody knew Tara. Like, the fact that I was in was insecure. I wanted to, like, literally cry in a corner. Was so nervous. But like, I.

Something.

You're right. Something happens when I put the music on. It's my moving meditation. It's my alter ego. And we actually talk about alter egos before we. Before we even get into it. So I found that in sharing my journey, my story, talking about an alter ego, the fact that we all have one, and, like, really warming these Women up through their mind and, like, their soul, so to speak. Before I even put the music on, it's like we can see each other all the same, right? Because you. I mean, you know very well these women, women's events that we go to. Like, I mean, I remember going into my first women's event, looking around the room like, oh, my God, I didn't pack the right clothes. Like, she's so beautiful. Like, oh, my. Like, all these things, and I'm like, if I feel this way and I know someone's looking up to me, thinking all these things about me, like, you know, I know she's feeling that way, so why don't we just talk about it and then move all that motion through our body so it became less about the choreography and more about just, like, moving in, like, the beautiful way that our bodies were meant to.

So you talk about the alter ego, and what do you believe the alter ego is? You know, when I was talking about it with you, and even when I see you, because, I mean, Tara is very different than the alter ego that shows up. You are the same. But I think it's like, this tandem relationship internally with you. Like, Eva is definitely you, but she doesn't come out to play every day until the music comes on. Right. But she is part of you. Right? What do you think? The alter ego. What's a good way to describe what an alter ego is? It's not, like, not who we are, right?

Yeah. It's just a state change. It really is. It's just an energy shift. It's so funny because I read the alter ego effect, like, two years ago, and I'm like, oh, my God, we should have collaborated and wrote this together, because that's exactly what I do in tone and t. So my alter ego name is Eva. But, like, there's so many different alter egos we have for so many other areas of our life. The one that shows up at work, so how I describe it is like this. So I turn. I turn the. It's like the phrase for tone and tease is unleash and let go. And that could be literally in any area of your life. So, like, maybe you need to, like, let go in a conversation, or maybe you need to ask the question in a job or in a relationship. Or maybe you just need to walk differently when you're walking out of your car. Like, so who do you have to be to do that? And I think that when people say, I can't dance or I can't do that, I'm like, well, can you walk on your two feet and move your body and hear music? Like, you can absolutely move your body and it doesn't have to look like anyone else. So, yeah, your alter ego is whoever you need to be in that moment. So I try to, like. And in that moment when I'm teaching, it's more about having fun and releasing and not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, but just loving yourself in that moment. And I'll never forget, it's the events that I teach that teach me what I need to do in this program. One woman came up to me after I presented and was crying, and she's like, I haven't had sex with my husband in a year, and I'm calling him right now. And I'm like, okay, well, this is definitely more than dance fitness, right?

It's life. And I think as women, we wear so many different types of ha. Especially now with everything going on. I mean, I could just imagine, like, you know, a mom. And I'm not disparaging men because I do have men that have taken my classes and do my program because they have feelings too, really. And all the things that you have to do as a mom and often forget to put yourself first and what that can look like of maybe not having time to get ready or going shopping or putting on the clothes that you maybe once did when, before you met your guy. Or maybe you're looking to meet the guy and, you know, you feel like you have to lose, wait or have to be this person. But, like, in the beauty that is right now and who you are, it's just more of an energy, right? It's not a look. Because I'll never forget listening to Oprah and she says looks are fleeting. And it's true. Like, we can get, you know, fillers, Botox, the abs, the clothes, anything that we want. But really who we are is the energy that we exude and the person that we are. So, yes, like, beauty is first eyesight, right? But, like, don't you feel it from someone like, oh, what question? Yeah. And I just think that for ourselves, because I know that there's many women who are so stunning that we would in a second want to trade places. Maybe like, by the visually looking at them saying, my life would be. I know that I have said this. My life would be so much easier if I looked like her. Like, I've said it. I'm like. Or thought it in my head. But really, I've seen beautiful women who teach me lessons just by who they are in so Many different ways. So, yeah, like, I know that was a really long answer. And who's. What is your alter ego?

I love this because I really want to transition that answer into something that is really powerful. And I'm going to be speaking from my own kind of transparency with this, because I think when I got into personal development through network marketing, and I understood, like, mindset. Mindset. Mindset. Mindset's everything. Mindset's everything. And I, you know, since I was a little girl, like, my mindset had to outsmart the entire room to be safe. Like, I understood mindset, and I could read a room before I could even, like, do multiplication. Like, I always had that. And I knew how to manipulate minds to stay safe. So, like, mindset, yes, is important, and the state change and all of that's really important. But I started to get frustrated with personal development because I think it. They. They emphasize that it's all that and it's not, you know, and then that's when I started to get into, like, emotional work. And I'm like, yes, I understand this, but I can also understand that myself so much, where I stuff the feelings down, because I get it. Like, it makes perfect sense why I am the way I am and why this person's the way they are. And it's not justifying, but it's like you minimize the emotions and the pain that came with that sometimes, or even the joy. Like, we can even minimize joy as well. And so that's when I became really passionate about, like, the energy work, the emotional work. And you and I were talking beforehand. And I'm going to be really honest with you, because dancing makes me really uncomfortable. I'm that girl in the room even today.

That'S like, I could never do that. I could never do that. But give me a pair of boxing gloves or something to hit, you know, Because I've always suppressed anger most of my life, and so that's like a safe way. So I played sports. Like, I could get out aggression and anger and move that through my body and out, and nobody really knew that's what I was doing, but I could get it out. But there's something with dance that's very sexual and beautiful. And I think for me, who's experienced lots of sexual trauma in my life and abuse in that regard, that I think part of me, and this may be something that you've dealt with with women that come up to you after.

I'm still afraid to be seen that way.

And to allow myself to go there in a way Even though I could sit and eat popcorn and watch you all day long, I think it's the most beautiful, beautiful thing in the world to watch people dance. Men, women, kids.

And there's still that little girl in me that's saying, that's not safe to do. So you're talking to me in a class. Somebody who's strong, powerful, independent. I have all the things that you would look at me and be like, you could do this. And yet there's that part of me that's like, this is scary. What would you say to somebody like me in your class?

So I feel like there's. There's not a ton of one on one that I, like, speak to somebody because it's more of an experience, I guess I would say it's like the. From the start until before even the music comes on, I feel like I create such a safe space in sharing my story and in the movements that I share, that even before we move our body that I think it kind of just opens someone up. And, like, we do a visualization as well. So basically, like, so how we started, Tracy. And, like, for anyone listening and I feel you so much on this, because I know it's a real thing, and I have sexual abuse in my past, too, so I can totally understand if, like, someone holding on to that, but I feel like it's. It's releasing it through your body. So, you know, I come on, I come into the class, and I've taught anywhere from, like, five people to 500, and it's just sharing a part of me and my story and, like, all the things that I've kind of struggled with. Like, and I think it brings people into the moment and slowly tears down the wall to be like, all right, it's safe. So, like, you need to know that the person that's, like, about to teach you is. Is a safe person. So we create that. And then it's about, like, you know, where in your life do you need to let go? Like, you know, and what does that look like to you? And knowing that we do do that through our body, so whether it's the punching, whether it's the running, you know, any kind of movement, it's. It's doing it through your body.

Mm.

So, yeah. So. And then, like, and then we go into the visualization of the alter ego and everything, too. So it's almost like. And not to interrupt you, just to finish this off, is when you. When you can kind of change your state and maybe even think of you as another person. You as your highest self, like, and how would they would do something? So I feel like that's kind of the, like the movement through before we even get to the. To the body.

Yeah, you know, I think, you know, and through my own personal work the last decade, I. You know, we talk about mind, body, and soul all the time, and I think the mind actually should be last on the list and the body should be first. Our soul kind of drives both. But looking back at my own kind of healing the last 10 years specifically, and even as a child, looking back as a child, my body, I mean, I had ulcers and migraines in kindergarten. If that's not telling you something at that age, the body always knows. The body is always the compass, and I spend four decades ignoring it. And I don't say that with shame today, but I think that our body is always giving us clues. And even in this conversation, even though you're in Jersey and I'm here in Arizona, there's so much heat coming off of my body right now because I've just hit on something for myself, clearly. And I knew it. I knew this conversation would go here.

But I think that especially as women and men out there too, but women, we kind of just power through. Like, that was my go to, is to power through, power through and ignore the body, because I'm going to mindset my way through this. And I'm not saying the mind is important and the soul isn't important, but if we really listen to what our body is telling us all the time, it's letting you know what you need to do. And I know that I'm supposed to be dancing with you because, you know, it was a couple years ago, we were. I think it was Lori's event where you were going to have us come and like, be like your backup dancers or something. And I was watching the videos and I had the moves down, and you know what I did? I bailed because I was like, I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. You know, and it was my stuff. It had nothing to do with, like, being on a stage or that I'm not good enough. Had nothing to do with that. It was that little girl in me that was like, this is really, really scary. This is really scary. But I think, you know, how powerful where my healing really shifted was like the. So the somatic part, like the movement of the energy through our body and whether it is through kickboxing and the anger part, there's. There's also the feminine energy that I've always struggled with, I know, masculine energy like the back of my hand. That's how I stayed safe, right? But it's this powerful feminine energy that needs to come out and needs to move, right? And I think that's what you do so fucking beautifully. And you give us all permission, myself included, to really be safe in that. Even though maybe my story was, it wasn't safe. And I know many of you listening, especially you, type A, overachieving woman out there, know that I get you. And maybe you don't feel safe being in that feminine energy. You can be as powerful in that, and that's what you bring to the table. And I think that's why I'm so drawn to you, other than just your beautiful heart and all the things you are. But it's almost like you're giving me permission. Every time I see you dance, I'm.

Like, totally receiving everything you're saying. And I'm like, yes, yes, yes. And I'm like, I was laughing at the Type A because that's so my sister. And she will. Like, she's not. Like, she's not open to doing it, right? But she releases it in another way, too. And it's interesting because whenever I do a class, the lights are low. And, you know, I've worked with a lot of women who just don't feel comfortable. And just, again, like, it's. Sometimes you don't have. It's like I don't have the verbiage of why and how it works, but just the flow of everything and the energy and the space that we actually all set for each other is really beautiful. That, like, no one's judging anyone. And I even invite you. I mean, you're obviously not at my class right now or anytime soon.

Well, you're coming to Arizona.

We'll have a private class. Oh, my God, 100%. But you just put some music on and put the lights down. Close your eyes. There was this one exercise I did at Lori's last event, the Bliss Project. And it just came to me at that moment, which was. It was just, you know, how the universe just kind of sends you. It was such a beautiful thing. So. And I hadn't planned it. It was the. After. It was towards the end of the class, and I had everyone. I just showed them a couple of movements, but I have them close their eyes and I put the music on, shut the lights down. Like, just do whatever your body feels. Whatever your body feels like, this is. If you don't know what to do here are two moves. It was so beautiful that I wish there was a video camera of these women. And, like, some of them were sobbing, some were smiling, and just. I had chills all over my body because at that point in the presentation, like. Like, everyone was completely. Had let go. They just, like, were so in their bodies, and nothing mattered at that moment. And it was just a testament to how the energy in our body is so real. We're truly energy beings, and when we can get out of our head, it doesn't matter what we look like. And, like, it was really beautiful. And I don't know, I just keep that moment with me anytime where I'm like. I'm like, you know, where am I going next with this program? Like, what is the next step? Like, knowing that it is something real that women truly need.

You know, it's. It's no, Like, I know God in the universe gives us everything that we're supposed to have to teach us. And it's no surprise to me that of course I give birth to this tiny dancer, you know, this butterfly of a child, free spirit, who, you know, came out of the womb dancing and, you know, singing, and, like, you put her on that kind of. In that kind of environment, and, like, I needed to see that. It's almost like, wow, like, that's what being a little girl should have been, right? And, you know, she. And she can do the whole twerking and all the things. Like, she can do all the dancing, and it's amazing. And unapologetically does it, and it makes me so happy. And, like, even listening to you right now, like, you know me, you put any challenge in front of me, I'll crush it. And yet, like, the thought of this still, I'm just being really honest, like, it terrifies me the fuck out of me right now. And, you know, you and I've been talking candidly about, like, what it looks like for dating for me for the first time in a long time. And when I was talking to my therapist about this, and this does tie into what you do, and if you need any direction about the healing component that you do bring to the table, like, please know this. You bring such power in healing, that feminine energy for women, because you are doing it to me with me, even though I'm not on the stage right now with you. But when I was talking to my therapist about it, I said, you know, I'm not worried about getting my heart hurt. I'm not worried about this. I'm not worried about that. I'm worried That I won't allow myself to really let that feminine energy flow. And yeah, that's a, it's a real issue for me. You know, give me a gold. A crush or something to dominate and I can do that and that feels safe to me.

And I really want to dance with you. Like I really. Because I know the healing that comes with that and.

What'S next for tone and tease? Do you think.

It'S so interesting? Like I love, I love these conversations because I think it sometimes brings me closer to what's next and can I just acknowledge you and how much, how amazing you are? Guys, don't you like love how honest and real and, and raw and just like open Tracy is? I just think you give so many people permission and I just, I'm so grateful for you. Love talking to you. So you know, right now, and I don't know when this is gonna air, but it's what it's beginning of almost mid May in New Jersey and you know, we've been really in the quarantine right now and I had so many plans for what this was gonna be with all the events I was going to and during those events with all of the videotaping and everything that was gonna have a product, right? So I was like, alright, like I can just take this online. I start, I also teach, still teach dance classes and other fitness classes virtually right now for free. And I remember first starting it, I'm like, it just didn't feel right and I'm just like, I do have that part of me where I push through to like I'm an entrepreneur, like make things happen. And one of the things I do struggle with is being and letting things flow. And I feel like for the first time I'm just kind of being and trying to get like, get those creative juices flowing again. I don't want to just put something out, just to put it out. And I'm so used to doing things live and when I tried to do tone and tease virtually, it just didn't feel right. Right. So. And the reason why I'm sharing this with you guys is because I feel like I think there's a time to push and to do things that don't feel comfortable. But I also think there's a time in your creative process where you can allow yourself to be so that long winded answer again is just I'm letting myself be and having fun with moving myself because I think I'm at a point where I'm like going through some healing which I think the world as a whole is so, you know, like, I'm busy in so many other areas of my life that, like, I'm almost addicted to being busy. I mean, hence 7W true form.

So.

Right. So in this time of quarantine, I finally have come to the place where I'm like, yeah, it's okay to be. And, like, I don't have to hurry up because, you know, we all need nurturing, including myself. So I'm excited to see where it will go. But for now, like, I'm having fun dancing on Instagram and, you know, in my stories and just connecting with people and finding the place of where it's going to go next, which I know it will be somewhere. Yeah.

You know, you are way more than just a dancer and a teacher. You really are a healer. And for all of those of you listening right now, even if dancing is not your thing, because trust me, like, unless there was a picture of margaritas, dancing was not my thing. And since I'm not doing that, dancing is so my thing. Even though I haven't partake, I'm not partaking quite all in yet. I know that that's coming.

I want you guys all to follow Tara. How can they find you on Instagram?

Tara Romano just. I do have a Tone and tease Instagram account as well. But, yeah, I'm really on there. I'm a lot in stories. I am on Facebook, too. You can Google me. But I. Right now, I'm just like, I'm just having fun living and just, you know, and doing, like, talks like this and just really connecting with myself and other people and just really trying to experience life the best I can.

So, yeah, for those of you that are a little more tightly wound, like I am from time to time, I really, I am, like, telling you right now to go follow her. She will make you smile. She'll make you feel good. She'll make you feel uncomfortable sometimes, too, which is absolutely what you need. I'm so, like, my body is, like, flaming hot right now, which is a good sign. And that's a good thing. Like, that used to scare me before. And like I said, our body's a compass. It's telling me something very clearly right now in our conversation. And I know that I'm not the only one that's listening right now to you and feeling that. So if you have been so deeply moved by this conversation, I know I was. So thank you. And it was way more than just, like, Eva and Zumba and all that. Like, you are a healer. My friend and please continue on your path to doing this work because it is doing so much for little girls like me even. Please go follow Tara and if you love this episode, I want you to screenshot this episode and let us know that you loved it. Please just give her all the love in the world because she is so dear to me. Tara, I just appreciate you so much and your friendship and your love in this conversation so much.

I just love it. Appreciate you so much. I'm like jumping through the phone and giving you a big hug. You're just such a special person. Thank you.

Thank you for tuning in to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. If you learned a thing or two from our show today, it would mean a lot to me if you shared it and tagged me so I can hear exactly what landed on your heart. This will help me to bring you even more episodes with the topics and guests you want. Please head over to itunes and leave an honest and loving five star review. If this made an impact on you, you can find me on Instagram at traceeomalley and I have tons of free resources for you@traceeomalley.com as always, if you are wanting to ignite your purpose, profits and build your legacy, it's time to stand on the front line of your life and do the work. Let's become Bulletproof.