55: Detaching from expectations and ego to find alignment, intuition, and happiness with Taylor Simpson

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Welcome to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. I am your host, Tracy o'. Malley. I'm a mom to millennials, an author, Enneagram expert and multi million dollar entrepreneur, and master performance and business coach. I've gone from rock bottom to building a bulletproof business and life. If you're looking for the unfiltered transparent truth and ethos, an extra kick in the ass, you will discover that here. Each week I'll be bringing you success stories of high level entrepreneurs as we discover how they became bulletproof and created their empire. You'll learn the story behind the glory along with Enneagram inspired truths so you can ignite your own purpose, profits and build your legacy. It's time for you to become bulletproof. Buckle up. Let's go.

Hello, hello and welcome to another episode of the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. And this episode, I have no idea what the hell is going to happen because when this woman and I get together, we probably cover 100 different topics within 30 minutes. And it's like, oh my God, totally. Like, I thought I was the only one that was weird like this. And she is equally as weird and amazing. So Lord knows where this conversation is going to go. And I was like, fuck it, let's just go and see what happens. Because it's always beautifully led, it's definitely divinely led, and exactly what you listening need to hear right now. So buckle up because this is going to be juicy and fun and if you got kids around, I'm just going to tell you right now, both her and I use the F word quite a bit. So just a little disclaimer. It'll probably be more than usual today because it won't just be me saying it. My good friend Taylor Simpson is one of the best motivational speakers I've ever heard. Mindset business coach. And she has an amazing podcast called A Tailored Adventure and Happiness. You need to follow her on Instagram because her stories are great. She'll just break out in dance sessions and she's traveling to Africa and then to la and every week you see her on a plane somewhere. Right now we're in the middle of a quarantine, so, you know, other than her not being able to travel anywhere, her spirit is all over the globe for sure. Like, she has made an impact everywhere she goes and she has been really tapping into the frequency of abundance. You know, we hear about manifesting and all that bullshit and you know, we know like, you can't just say I'm going to manifest shit and then wait for it to Happen. She actually teaches people how to use their frequency and actually make it happen. Not just say it. Not just, like, write it down in a beautiful journal and have I am statements. Hell no. Like, she's like, no, we're gonna get dirty and we're gonna do the fucking work. And that is what I love about her. She is somebody who walks her talk in everything she does. And she's got quite a story as well. Like, when I met her, I had no idea. And usually I can kind of, like pinpoint, like, where things went, the turn happened. And with her, I was like, you gotta be fucking kidding me with this story. It's crazy. And maybe we'll get into it. I don't know. But you can go listen to her podcast too, to hear some of that. But my good friend, Taylor Simpson. Hello, my love.

Oh, my goodness. Can you just intro me every time I enter a room? I love you. Thank you so much. I receive all of that. Likewise. Like, you are just. And I remind you of this all the time as much as I possibly can. You're just such a special human in my life, and you are such a bright soul. And every time we get together, it's just like, yep, our souls are just like, back together again. Let's go deep. So thank you for being you. And I cannot wait to dive in today with you.

Oh, my gosh. So when I met you, like, I could feel your energy before I even saw you. And that is one of my superpowers for sure, is like feeling people's energy. And I know it is yours too. I mean, that's what you do day in and day out about frequency. And even though we can feel energy, you and I, very differently, I think that's why we are such a good match for each other, because I bring something to the table with energy that you don't, and vice versa. So how did you end up realizing that this is where Taylor's zone of genius is? Because a decade ago, this wasn't it. You were, like, doing outfits on fucking Instagram. Yeah.

And anger management and Overeaters Anonymous.

Exactly.

So far for no. It's really funny. I've been doing a lot as I'm fully stepping really, really into even more gifts that I have that I have really been utilizing or even knowing how to share in the online space because they're more physical. It's been funny to literally take the past few weeks and actually unpack them and really pinpoint where they all started. It's funny as I do these podcasts, interviews, over the years, that view has changed because as we evolved and we kind of peel back layers, it's like, oh, wait, that's not my story anymore. So it's funny you asked this in this real time. That's what I'm unpacking. And so I knew I had a gift of being very empathic and being able to just like you, right, See someone and be like, oh, oh, oh, bless her heart.

Yeah.

And you're like, oh, God, my body hurts for, like, what happened to you when you were 15 years old, right? You just see it. You see the whole scenario play out in your head, and you're like, I should not introvert, but I should. And so that for me, it was. When I was a little girl, I used to be able to just.

I was too emotional, right? I was always called too emotional growing up because I was feeling everyone's feelings. Like, I could tell when my parents were fighting on a whole other floor in a whole other room. And I would get anxiety. Like, I can actually feel it. And then kind of. It wasn't really, you know, harnessed to express that gift. So I just kind of kept it to myself. And then we moved to Gettysburg when I was in middle school, and we lived in a house that was used as a hospital in the Civil War. So you can imagine an empathic girl living in this sort of home where lots and lots and lots of deaths happened. And so I would see ghosts and talk to them, and it was my normal and. But I thought everyone could do that, right? And so I quickly then was like ghost girl. And no one wanted to stay in my house, but then turn into bullied for being too much. All these things when I look back now, I'm like, oh, it wasn't. You were too much. You had a gift that stood out and people could feel that, and it was weird. It was too weird for them. And so I turned that off. And I'm realizing now, over the past probably two years, specifically, how much I turned off that gift. And one of the things that always stood with me, which I always thought everyone had, is I'm super clear audience. I'm literally constantly hearing it. I mean, I never turn that piece off. I've always heard what to do, what to say, the moves to make. That's why people are like, how does everything you put out in your business just, like, sell out? I listen to the guidance and I take immediate action when it's in alignment because I know that align with my soul. I thought everyone had this voice and conversation in their head. I realized over the past two years, oh, that's no, you're tapped in, tuned in. Utilize that. Utilize this team that's around you, your spirit guides, your intuition, whatever you want to call it, God, Jesus, whoever.

Being able to use that. Then when I started doing more in person stuff and mindset work and really infusing, every woman has this intuition. I'm no different. Like, these things I'm sharing does not make me special or a unicorn. I am a unicorn, but not a unicorn. I'm a unicorn.

And so I feel more ever empowered to remind women that they too have these gifts of intuition to making the right decision, to saying no, to creating boundaries. Really, really easy. Because every single woman, women are like so fucking powerful, has that innate ability. And I just tapped into that and accepted it. A lot of women just haven't accepted the gift they have because we've been told that, be quiet, don't be too emotional, don't get in people's space in their bubble and tell them what's wrong with them because it's offensive. All these things, it's really an unfolding of remembering what my gifts have always been. But I let society take them away from me and I let them, I let them take away from me. Yeah.

I remember the exact moment that I knew, like intuitively that all that stuff, that pain, even as a nine year old, like, I knew like, this is all going to matter for something really big, you know, and then life gets a hold of you and takes you on the journey of, you know, stuffing it, minimizing it, squashing the gifts. And, and I know when I hit the wall of like, oh, those things that I thought disqualified me are actually the very thing that qualifies me to be who I am today in the world. And the gifts that I have that help millions of people. Right? And I know that you had that same experience. So usually it's a rock bottom kind of like, holy fuck moment that we surrender that and say, okay, this has to mean something. And what, what was that for you? Or were there a few of them? Because as you said, we are constantly evolving. I'm like on Tracy 6.0 at this point, you know, I've got a, like a decade and a half on you, but I know that for you to really tap into the gifts that like you said, you've had all along as that little girl. I could totally see you. Oh my God, how cute were you? What was it? That was like, well, fuck, I got nowhere to go but up at this Point that happened where you were at least willing to unpack the gifts.

Yeah. Oh, my gosh. So clearly, like it was yesterday. It was sitting on a couch. And I'll give a lead up to this, but just visualize this sitting on a couch in our, you know, our basement man cave, right? Doing the same thing we do every single evening with my now ex husband. Watching tv, some stupid show that was dumbing me down by the minute. Just finished a bottle of wine and a pint of Ben and Jerry's, had probably just smashed a glass up in the kitchen maybe two hours prior from getting mad at my ex husband for gaslighting me, right? And I remember sitting on that couch and just kind of like looking around and seeing him and seeing the life of the Creator, living in this beautiful home. I had the dream job. I worked for the un I worked on Capitol Hill. I had the clothes, I had the closets, I had everything. Never felt so alone ever before. And at that moment, I remember hearing the voice that had dulled down during this time get really loud and say, you know better. You know better. And at that moment, it was like the little girl that was, like, always outside by herself, playing make believe, talking to the trees and rolling around in grass, right? She kind of reappeared and was like, you forgot about me. You forgot about me. And so that next day, I literally put myself in Overeaters Anonymous and anger management to get the help that I knew I needed, needed. And it was really fucking terrifying. I wanted to continue to numb away my feelings because the food helped me stuff down all the girls that made fun of me growing up for being too much, for wearing too many crazy clothes and having too much personality and talking too fast and being weird.

And then creating a life that looked on the outside, because I was supposed to do that. Getting married to someone who took care of me after my dad, who was a pastor, we found out, had multiple affairs, he swooped in and took care of me. I had all this anger that I just knew it wasn't me from literally that day when I went to anger management. Every age Anonymous. I then started to do the work. I didn't know what that meant at this time, dead asleep, but I had this whisper of like, there's so much more for you. You're such a ray of light. I've always been told I was like a sunshine since I was little.

I discovered the self development world eventually. And it's funny, what kind of woke me up, brought me back to it is, do you remember Tumblrs When Tumblrs existed.

Yeah, that was like seven years ago. Like six. Seven years ago, right?

Yes, yes. Because seven years ago was when I had my awakening and got my. Actually the chakras tattooed at my spine. I was at my 9 to 5, just miserable. Probably just got yelled at by my boss, who is just a narcissistic woman. And I was scrolling through Tumblrs of nature scenes and very mystical photos and the universe, and I was like, God, these are like. I didn't know what that meant, but my body was like, yes, yes, that's what you like. And I'm like, this is what I like. Like mystical stuff and nature. Like, okay, I'm going to keep going. And I was like. And it just. Every day I would get mesmerized by this Tumblr accounts of nature and mystical images. And so before I know it, I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, my God, I have it all wrong. And then I dove into the movie the Secret, which I hate, but it was obviously good for the time, and got into Law of Attraction and neuroscience and psychology to figure out what. Why I let the world do what it did. Why I chose. I chose to let the world do what it did to me before I knew I was in a rabbit hole and playing with my own brain and neuroscience and neuroplasticity and all of this, and completely changed my life around because I decided to go into the rabbit hole. I decided to turn off the rest of the world and actually go inward to figure out who I was and what I was meant to do. That's where I'm at today.

I love what you say because I believe that everything is a choice. Yes. When bad things happen to us as a child, most of the time we didn't have a choice in that happening to us. However, once we're adults, we get to choose how we use that either to destroy us or empower us to do great things in the world. Right. Everything's a choice. And I love that you own that. Like, you chose that ex husband. I got a few of those in my life. Like, I'm like, fuck, what was I thinking? But I chose it based on who I was at that time.

Exactly right.

And I also love what you said about, like, seven years ago and the Secret, and you loved it then. And, you know, you've changed your mind about that because you've evolved. And I know there's so many people listening right now that feel like they need to pick it, stick with it till the end of time, and when we do that to ourselves, we really, like, stunt our growth. Right. If we're not always open to evolving. And, you know, with the online space today, everything that we say at this point is documented and on the interweb for the world to see. So, like, I go watch videos that I've done six, seven years ago. I'm like, oh, my God. But that's who I was then. And it was great. But if somebody wants me, wants to hold me to that, then you're an asshole. Okay? So I know that there's people listening right now that maybe are sitting on that couch looking at their fucking asshole spouse. Whether it's a man or a woman. Could go either way. I got a lot of men listeners who have asshole wives or asshole partners, too.

Yeah.

And they don't think they have a choice because of what you said. Like, he's taking care of me, she's taking care of me. They fill this hole in my heart. What am I gonna do? Like, yeah, what would you say to that person right now, as you were, you know, taking that last bite of Ben and Jerry's, looking at him like, what? What the actual fuck? And then how do you take that next step when you have no idea what to do next? How do you know, like, anger management and Overeaters Anonymous is where you want it to be?

Yeah. For real.

The first is really, like, asking yourself, is this what I want to repeat every single day for the next, you know, 50, 60, 70 years? Like, really ask yourself that, ego aside, because ego is going to be like, yeah, but imagine how much harder it will be.

We don't.

Like, Right. Like, anytime you ask these kind of questions, your ego is the only thing that's going to get involved and try to talk you out of it because it wants you to be safe. It doesn't want you to shake things up. Shake things up. Money's involved. And, you know, I'm making an obnoxious voice because it's really ridiculous how much we let, like, we own a home together. We have kids. I get that. I don't have kids, but, like, you have things are things, right?

I have. I have. And I've been in a situation and. Yeah. No fucking idea. But you know what? So I do. So I can speak truth into this.

Yeah. Yes. Yes. And so it's really asking yourself, like, straight up, like, do I want to live like this for the rest of my life? And if you say no, it is literally at that moment, you have to take responsibility to do the hard shit, period. It's almost like a tough love with this. Get over it. Literally, even no matter if you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, but you don't know my situation. But really, everyone has a situation. Everyone has hardship they're going through. Everyone's been through trauma. Get through it so you can get over it. So allowing yourself to say, okay, I don't want to be like this. What am I going to do to move through what's holding me back from getting to the life that I want to live? So that way I can go over all of this and I say, go through it. That's then saying, okay, what do I got to do? Okay, I've got some anger issues that I know are fucking hot mess express crazy shit anger. Okay, I need to go get help. Noted. Wow. Yeah, I probably definitely eat my feelings away and then feel like shit afterwards and spiral into shame. Great, I need to go get help again. Your ego is going to be like.

You don't need help.

You can read a book. Ignore the ego. Ego age your amigo at this point. So really it's one, asking yourself, do I want to be here until the day I die? Two, okay, I gotta take responsibility. Three, what do I have to move through? What's the help I need to get? That's it. Don't worry about how are you going to sell the house? Where am I going to live? Oh, my God, I'm going to miss their family. What are my kids going to think? What are the neighbors going to think? Don't even go there yet. Work on you first. That way you can be the best mom, the best dad, the best partner, the best child, the best teacher, the best whatever it is. But those four are really going to get the ball rolling before you jump to the materialistic stuff that's going to come. And you're going to have to work through it.

Well. And I want to piggyback on what you just said because, you know, I know there's some of you out there like, well, she doesn't know. She doesn't know what it's like to have kids. And I'm here to tell you, like when she asked the question, is this something I want to repeat over and over and over again? If you are a parent, you actually have more of a responsibility to fucking do it. Because if you don't repair it, not only are you going to repeat it, but your legacy is going to repeat it for generation after generation after generation. And that for me was like, I don't want them to carry this burden. So if you're a parent out there, you are obligated, more so than if you're fucking single to actually do this work. And what you said was so important. Like, know why you need to make a change. Let go of the attachment of how it happens. Like, high involvement to the process, low attachment to what that looks like. Right. Love that. Okay, so you go through anger management, Overeaters Anonymous, clearly you lose the gaslighting ex husband, and then you're like, okay, and you're still at the job with the narcissistic boss. And then the next thing you know, you're getting the chakras tattooed on your spine and. And now you're moving into this space and you don't know how this is going to play out. But you know why, right?

Yeah. Yeah.

So knowing why is the most important thing, because that's what gets you up every day. And it. It allows you to not be so attached to the how. But I know there's a lot of you that are. That's great, Chase. That's great, Taylor. Yeah. But tell me how you did it. Like, what happened next?

Yeah, totally.

The top of it comes down to I made a choice with everything I made.

Right.

I made some good decisions along the way in alignment and some choices that were out of alignment. Right. And so before you start any sort of journey, just accept that you're gonna fuck up, you're gonna make the wrong choices, you're gonna get in the wrong holes, you're gonna hang out with the wrong people just like you did before. It's life. It's going to happen. So don't think that just by doing the thing and going all in on your sole purpose is going to be easy and fun. You can make it fun, but it's also going to be a challenge. It's not always unicorns and rainbow. As much as I would like it to be.

With that, it was really then putting all of my attention into what felt good to me. I literally led my life at that moment of doing what felt good to me during that time. I've always loved fashion. I share my personality through fashion. Since probably the day I came out of the womb, I'm sure I came out with a tutu. And so at that time, when I went to anger management and went through this evolvement, I love to be able to move my body to get that energy shifting. And so that's when I created an Instagram account to share my gym outfits that were like, neon pink and all this. And the captions would be Very mindset oriented because give them what they want, deliver what they need, give them what they want, the shredded abs and the hot pink sports bra, all that. But then also start infusing some mindset work while doing this and leading from what feels good to me.

That me sharing my workouts and my gym outfits and tips ended up attracting people from around the world to say, hey, I need some support, I need some help. Are you a coach? Can you help me with. Becoming happier was really what they wanted. They just wanted to be happier. I helped them with fitness, nutrition and got the certifications, and before I knew it, I was able to quit my job at the UN That I thought was my dream job because I'm a humanitarian at heart. So I work in the World Food Program. I was like, you know what? I can be a humanitarian on my own and I can do this giving back and helping people become happier on my own. So I was able to quit that 9 to 5 and take on, which was my first online business, full time, and serve people and help them and evolving along the way with myself too. Along with that was finding out more of what I want to teach. I started going down the fitness and nutrition route, and that really served me for a few years. But then I got to a place of, okay, I need to play a little bigger. These people need to hear a little deeper stuff. I need to get them to evolve faster was kind of the message I was getting because it's so easy to baby people and dance with them and give them a bottle on mindset and neuroscience. I knew that my people wanted to be like, okay, I'm ready to go all in. That was a time where I decided to pivot in my business, which was, I share this part because this was. Was very, very hard and super messy. Switching from being known really well in the fitness world because I was a competitor as well. Literally deleting that out of my life, changing my Instagram handle. Oh, my God, Heaven forbid. At the time, it was really fucking hard. I had to have the whole strip, the ego. I had to then work on my attachment to identity. I had a huge. I still struggle with attachment issues. I'm like 99.9% there on the art of detachment, and it's quite lovely. But that's present time. Still not 100% detached. I had to go through a detachment issue with ego and around fitness. And then I ripped that bandit off and went full into the mindset world. And that's when I really started to uncover health frequencies, work, and how the World works and how I can teach people. During this time, as working myself, I attracted my now current husband, who is my soulmate, who was at the same time going through a very mirrored life to a T, where eventually our paths perfectly met at the most divine time, where we were both like, okay, I think I've done enough work where I'm ready to receive my ideal partner with was a constant battle of attachment, detachment, ego, identity, releasing all the outside stuff that society thinks that we have to have or have to look like or have to. Always coming back home to what do I want to do, what feels good to me and not giving a fuck what it looks like on the outside or how others are going to respond to it.

I love that, like, even in the gosh, I've known you two years now. That's crazy. In the two years that I've known you, I've seen you evolve and shift in businesses and how you show up and what you teach and what you offer. And I know some. And I'm speaking to myself, y', all. Just so you know as well, like, I know how scary that is when you've been known as one thing or they want to hear this story about. I mean, if I have to tell, like, the rehab mom story again, I understand that serves people, but that's not. That's not all I am. Right. And I know there's a lot of people that started in one thing, and they love it, and that's who they were at the time.

And.

And this is myself included. It's like, but that's not who I am anymore. But that still pays the bills that still my ego really likes that I get validation. I could do that in my fucking sleep, like, but it's not in alignment. And so what advice would you give to that person, man or woman out there, that is feeling that, like, I've had tremendous validation that I'm good at this, yet my soul has evolved so much that I can't do that anymore. Like that.

Yes. Yeah, it's. It's. I actually just went through another pivot in January. I completely. When I had, like, another.

Awakening breakthrough, crazy whirlwind shift deleting any sort of business coaching out of my. My business. Because I'm fully jumping into the mindset and motivational speaker and mindset work, like, fully in that and even in that.

Wow.

Oh, my God. Like, all they have is my mastermind. That's the only capacity holding. Because we do more than just business in the mastermind, of course. And so.

Just went through another pivot. And it's a. I share that because again, no matter how long you've been doing this and how evolved you are and you know, and how aligned you think you are with something, you're always going to grow and change your mind, and that's okay. So it's giving yourself permission that it's okay to change. And here's the thing. We think that when we pivot, everyone's going to be like, oh my God, I'm going to unfollow you or stop buying from you because you're changing. I didn't sign up for this. They fucking evolved with you. I have people that have been following me since day one. Literally, day one, little 90 pound Taylor before videos even exist on Instagram. This is probably the majority of my followers have evolved with me. And now they're doing frequency work and they were dead asleep when I was dead asleep. Just know that when you pivot, people aren't. There's gonna be people that are like, what the fuck? Right now? I made people like, you're fucking getting real weird. I am not about that life. They'll come back. They'll come back. They'll be back in a year. I'm not worried about it.

Right.

And so understanding the people that do leave, great. Here's the thing. Amazing people then flown into my life that are like, oh my God, I've been looking for someone who teaches exactly the way you teach and what you teach. Thank you for doing what you do. They have no idea. I just went through a pivot, right? So knowing that you're going to make way for people that are way more in alignment with where you're going. And plus, you don't want to be continuously serving people that aren't in alignment with you and don't give you joy because that's not an equal exchange of energy. You're not doing them any good by serving people that are not in alignment with you. Just because it's easy or your ego is attached, you're actually doing them more harm. And that was my like, okay, I got to stop offering business programs because it's just not in alignment with me. And it's not fair to anyone who's receiving this. They get results, but it wasn't fun for me. Right? And so being able to have that tough conversation with yourself and putting your ego aside, you just, you have to do it. Especially if you're a leader and you want to grow and really set an example. You have to be brutally honest with where you're at and make those big steps forward.

And it does deplete you. Yeah. Like, you can do it. I know we. Yeah, we all know you can do what you do. But eventually it will rob you of every ounce of good energy that you have, that you'll start to see some of these old behaviors that you worked so hard to kind of, like, really move out start to creep their way back. And that shit gets scary. Right. So I honor the pivot, and it's such a pleasure to watch you pivot. And the other thing that you said was so powerful. Like, you have to. Like when I ripped my life apart eight years ago, took my shit to ground zero and wiped out everyone but my kids, Everyone got leveled. Like, I knew that in order to make room for the beautiful souls that were coming, I had to let go of a lot. And whether it's love that you guys are waiting for, you're gonna have to let go of the safe option in order for your soulmate to come in. If it's love, same thing with money. And you have to, like, circulate that shit and let go of it to allow that to flow back in. And same thing with your identity. Like, stripping the old identity will allow the divine, whatever you call it, to really help you walk into that. And it's so beautiful watching you do that. So with the energy and frequency today, I think especially, you know, we were laughing about it earlier, like, with the way things are in the world right now, this is so fucking important. It's always been fucking important. Yeah, Right. I think we're just. People are now being awakened to, like, oh, shit. Oh, shit. So with. With frequency and using that to bring in abundance, whether it's love, money, whatever abundance means to you, how does that play a role for you? And then how do you help others with that?

Yeah, I mean, literally right now, and I'm sure people have heard this, but, like, sometimes we need to hear the same thing 10 times over. Right. Right now, there's two different types of people. People who are in fear of what's going on. Fear is what's killing us, not the coronavirus. It's just the stats out there. Yeah, it's a little higher than normal flu season because our bodies aren't used to it yet, but it's targeting no one different than it did before. It's the fear that's literally killing people 100%. That could be a hard pill to swallow for some, but it's the fact with that, there's people that are in fear, people that Are looking for opportunity to thrive. The people that are in fear are the ones who have massive control issues they're fearful of. This is an opportunity for people that are in the fear. If you're like, oh, shit, yeah, I'm in fear of what she's about to say, right? Think about how you control every area of your life. Do you try to control the outcome of your business to a T where if it doesn't turn out the way you want it to be, you freak the fuck out? Do you control your relationships trying to get your. Your partner to be exactly who you want them to be? Do you always think about the future and fear the worst thing to have happen? Because oh my gosh, if this happens, this doesn't happen. What are you going to do? I'm going to live in a cardboard box, right? The coronavirus is literally just highlighting everyone's attachment issues to the need to control an outcome and mother nature, the divine baby Jesus, Whatever you want to say is like, oh, you're cute. You guys think you can control everything. Good luck, have fun. You're going to have to stay inside. So there's that person and then there's a person and you can see those people when you're out and about. If you have to go to like the grocery store, good lord, you can see that. But it just. I threw up the other day because I'm never going outside again. I learned my lesson. So then there's the people who are then now waking up and thinking, oh, shit, yeah, I asked for more time off. I asked for more time with my kids and to be able to have the time to start to building that online business that I've been wanting to build. Right? Like the universe is now given this to you. And so the people that are like taking this time to think, I totally asked for this. What has happened frequency wise is the end. We were moving so fast. We were moving so freaking fast in this world that we kept saying, I wish I had more time. I wish I had more time. Everyone sending out an actual wavelength. This is science. A frequency on I wish I had more time, which is from a place of guilt and shame. The lower level frequency, it's an icky icky virus type of energy. Enough that mother nature was like, well, I hear you. Here you go with that. This is a time to be so extra cautious of the energy and the frequency that you are putting out, period. The people who are fearful of the virus again, it's. You're dropping your immune system. You're actually asking to get sick. The people who are like, no, I'm super healthy because I know that where my attention goes, energy flows. I'm really, really healthy, right? And focus on that. And oh my gosh, I have all this time. I'm so excited to put all my energy towards this group program that I know when I put out, people are going to love it because they need help in this area. I can see that so much. Putting your energy and your actual frequency infusing it and your desired outcome is going to turn out just like the coronavirus was the world's desired outcome. It's no freaking different, really. Leaning into the power that you have with your energy, with the frequencies you put out, whichever you can use those words interchangeably, is going to serve you immensely or continue to hold you back. The people that are taking this time to say, okay, I'm going to infuse my energy into this side hustle that I've always wanted to build because I'm working at home now, so I've got the time when we come out of this quote, out of this, right? Because it's never come out. It's a new normal. Soccer. This is our new normal. Eventually we're going to be able to go outside, but this is the way we live. And this is. People are start working from home. Companies are going to realize they can still survive with people working at home. This is our new normal when we get out. The people who took this time to do the inner work, to ask themselves what their soul needs to put the work into their sole purpose, are going to be fucking thriving after this, financially, energetically, relationship. Lee. Like that's a word. Like they're gonna be thriving after this. But the people who don't decide to go in and don't decided to really use their energy and their intuition are gonna be in the exact same fucking situation they were when they came in, when we came in.

Or worse.

Or worse.

Because 12 years ago when, like, the recession happened, even though it wasn't like everybody collectively experiencing it, I was not in a good place and I went down the fear hole and. And rock bottom came three, four years later, like, complete, like, pulverized my life. And thank God it did. But, you know, going into this experience with new tools and this kind of emotional health and dropping the ego, which is what I want to talk about next, because the only thing that's going to stop us from doing any of that isn't our bullshit excuses, it's the ego attached to the excuses. Yes, right. It's the only thing standing in your fucking way is that little voice with the annoying voice. We can use a little voice because it's sassy as fuck, right? It's that sassy little bully on the playground that's thinking, who the fuck are you? Right?

Uh huh.

So I know there's those of you that are scared to like, okay, I asked for this. Now I don't know what the quote work is, right. And the first thing you do, you have to do is drop the ego, right?

Yep.

So how would you tell people to explore the work and how to really quiet that ego voice? I mean, the ego serves us well at times too. Like it's not like the enemy all the time. Right. But it usually holds us way, holds us back way more than it helps us a lot of the time. Would you agree?

Yeah, 100%. And what's coming through for me, and you've actually heard me share this, it's funny, this is like what's coming through to answer this question is out of my.

Keynote is the three fold. Fs are definitely, I think, what people need most right now. Because whether you're taking action on going inward into self development and unpacking what you need to unpack, it tends to involve other people, it tends to evolve. These three Fs, or if you're going into building your business, these three Fs are also involved. The three Fs that will keep you back from going all in, whether emotionally or in your business or anything, is fear of failure, fear of judgment, and fear of success. So these apply to doing the inner work because we think, okay, I got to go in. I keep hearing people say that, but am I going to do it right? What if it doesn't work? What if I fail, right? And then I'm exactly where I still am. Then the fear of judgment, well, if I start to evolve, I start to go in. My partner, who does not believe in any of this kind of stuff is going to start judging me, making fun of me and giving me backhanded comments. Right? Been there, done that. And so in the fear of judgment, or if I, you know, I want to go inward and maybe share my experience in social media, people are going to think I'm fucking weird because I'm talking about Palo Santo and Sage and energy and woo woo shit. And my friends don't like that fear of success. Oh my gosh, what if I go in and I discover what my true fucking purpose is? What then am I going to do? Am I going to be able to Handle the power that I have within me. So to help, these my favorite mantras. And again, you can apply that. You want to go all in your business, but this we're just talking about going in the fear of failure. My mantra is fail fast, fail fast, fail hard, pick up, move forward. So if you're doing some inner work and you're maybe working on, you're quick to jump to anger or quick to get defensive. That's definitely one of the things that I constantly am working on is the quick to get defensive. And so it's coming to the point of when you do accidentally, which to this day, I'll bite my poor husband's head off. If I'm in the zone and my loving bubble isn't up there and ego is totally showing its face, I'll just say, okay, it's all right. You failed there for a second, but it's okay. You learned you're human. Pick it up. You learned move forward. Don't do it again. Now you know, don't be an ass. Same within the fear of judgment. Fear of judgment. The mantra for that one is my favorite, favorite favorite one. This is probably my favorite. You can see people's faces for this because we all need it. It's a good slap. No one cares about you as much as you think they do.

It's true.

Totally. Yeah. They're all worried about their own shit. Your partner, who you're fearful of, judging you for meditating or talking about stuff, he's not judging you. He doesn't give a fuck about your self growth and the woo woo shit you're getting into, it's shining a light on the shit he now realizes. Oh, fuck, she caught on. I gotta get my shit together. It has nothing to do with you. Nothing to do with you. And the moment you get to a place in life where you literally realize every backhanded comment or a negative comment, right now I'm getting so many haters for like how happy I am. Because they're like, don't you know the world's falling apart? I'm like, okay, we don't even need to go there. And so I'm just like, oh, wow, that's cute. You're in a lot of pain. I'm sorry, I'm actually literally gonna pray for you. Like you actually clearly are in a lot of pain right now. And so just knowing, getting to a place where you, you truly get that it's never about you. Then the fear of success. My mantra for this one, if the vision is in you it's for. You know that when you go inward and you do the work, quote the work, and you realize, oh my God, it's art. I love art. Oh my gosh, art I'm going to create is going to be beautiful and it's going to cost so much money. How am I going to be able to handle that? Where am I going to be able to paint? I don't even have space to paint. Don't worry about it. If that vision popped into your head of you doing a certain thing, it's literally your future self. Because time is an illusion. It's not real, right? Your past self and your current self and your future self are all in the same fucking line. It's all illusion. It's the quantum field, it's science. It's not woo woo. And realizing, oh my God, this vision just came into my head and I see it so clearly. It's just your future self saying, yo, girl, we're doing this. This is what your life is like. So drop the ego, drop the fear of judgment, drop the fear of failure so you can actually get to this vision that you just had in your head. It is happening. So it is happening. Your future self has already figured out where to paint, where to put the things, how to build a website. She's already done figure that out. Just trust the process. So the three Fs are like game changers.

That was gold. And I think that those three Fs actually kind of do go in order. I think if fear of failure is your thing, you definitely just buckle up. Because fear of judgment and fear of success will follow that, right? So don't think if you've got this fear of failure thing down, like, you're golden because the other two will follow. And I think the last pillar of that is fear of success. To be honest with you, that's where I go. Like I already. I'm not afraid to fucking fail. Judge all the fuck you want because nobody does give a shit. That's true. And I know that when that vision comes for me, whether it's love, and you and I have talked a lot about that for me, and I saw it very, very clearly and what that's going to play out. And that's terrifying for me, right? And it's happening, which is amazing. And also for those of you, whether it's your family, love, business, your health, your, you know, your personal emotional health, whatever that is, if you can see it.

It'S for you, like you said. And I know that in order to really receive that you have to be able to be led by that intuition and that instinct. And I think this is why you and I do connect so well, is because we operate from that place, because we got rid of the noise and we removed the coping mechanisms we used to stuff all that down for decades. Right. And so we are able to be present with our self enough to be so easily led by that today. It didn't happen overnight, y'. All. It's like anything. You have to practice it consistently over and be relentless with it, which I know you are, and I am. How would you say? Because I think that once we kind of move through that, we're dropping the ego. But then we're like, our old pattern is to second guess our intuition. Right. Just like you and my. You know, you were too much. I was better seen than heard. You know, like, those were the messages that I got. And when my intuition was saying, no, you need to speak loud, I was like, what the fuck? Like, no, I was told to be fucking quiet my whole life. Like, shut the fuck up. Right. And so how do you move from operating from that intuitive space and being present with yourself enough? You know, like you said, the world just gave us a gift of this. We have nothing but time right now. But people are trying to fill it with noise.

Yep.

Because it's scary. So how would you, you know, close people out with, okay, we know if it's. If the vision is in you, it's for you. And I know people. I know you want to believe that and you're listening. Like, yeah, yeah. But then ego comes and tries to rob you of that. So what. What practices do you have or that you can offer people that are. They're almost there, but they keep sabotaging or procrastinating and not leaning into their intuition? Meditation.

Totally. I'm going to give you the most. One that everyone's always heard of. They hear it over and over and over again. And it's the most painful one. Meditation.

And it is. I know. Like, it's like, really? Come on.

It's such a quote. Isn't a buzzword because it's a fucking thing. Right? Like, it's so talked about because it actually forces you to be with yourself, which is painful. If you're hearing this and you're on the edge of doing it, but you're like, I actually have to sit in silence with myself for like a minimum of 10 minutes. Oh, God. I mean, that's literally. I can give you write down 10 things you're grateful for, which is Amazing, right? That is part of my routine and that it should be a non negotiable for everyone. Because gratitude literally increases your vibrations and your frequency and goes into your heart. Your heart vibrates faster than anything else and sends off the strongest wavelength is measured by science. You can google it.

I don't even like that answer. It really is sitting with yourself and ripping off the fucking band aid and battling with your Monkey mind for 10 minutes one day, 15 minutes the next day, 20 minutes next day you might battle your monkey mind for an entire year of meditating. Welcome to silence. In that you learn exactly what you need to work on and what you you get to work on, right? You get always a gift when you find something that bubbles up and you're like, oh, shame is there. That's great, great.

Like it's changing the story and saying you get to work on something. The other side of whatever meditation bubbles up for you is growth. So it's changing the story of being fearful around it, right? At first it's pain and then you're like, all right, let's go in today for 10 minutes. I don't know what's going to come up, but I know I get to work on whatever it is. And that will lead you then to doing another thing after that would be like conscious journaling. Like conscious stream of consciousness journaling where you just ask a question and you just like you write down whatever you think comes to your mind. Sometimes it turns out to be total like chicken scratch. You're like, I don't know what that was. But journaling is a great wine stream of consciousness. But only doing that after you've actually not spiritual bypassed by avoiding meditation.

You know, it's funny, I'm going to tell you a funny story that happened to me just fucking last night because I've been meditating. Like it was the hardest thing for me eight years ago because to be alone with yourself like is really, really, really fucking hard. And last night I've been having a hard time sleeping lately. And last night at like 2:30 in the morning, it happened. I woke up like fuck. Like okay. And I have my little app with, with the guided meditation and I'm like, okay. And I was so annoyed with the guided meditation, right? And usually I'll just lean in and. And I literally had like this tantrum with myself. Like, like fuck you meditation.

Fuck you.

And I took my iPad, I'm like, I'm gonna watch the blacklist instead. And I was like, oh my God. Like, and I know. And then I Was like, okay, Trace, calm the fuck down.

It's okay.

Yeah, this is hard. It, you know, it's so cliche like you said and so woo woo. And like, no, it's. It's the hardest thing you'll ever do is to be alone with yourself. And that being said, you are one of the most, most beautiful, meditative kind of speakers teachers that I've met. You really, really are, because you embody it. And I know that you have done some of these things that you offer, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What are those?

Oh my gosh, like meditation. And is that what you're meaning? Like meditation? Yeah, I mean, meditating and journaling and all of this absolutely attests to who I am today. And I would be still a hot fucking mess if I wasn't doing this kind of work and allowing myself to journal and ask tough question and have the tough conversations and allow myself to learn and drop the. Does this make sense? Right? Because when I go into 5D and mystical things, it's like our ego wants to question it and our logical mind wants to question it, but it's really allowing yourself to just move through life from a place of curiosity and joy and excitement. That's really what it's all about.

It really, really is. And I think now more than ever, you know, from the experiences I've had in my life, I realize that the time we have on earth is just gifted to us and at any moment that can change. And you know, one of the questions I ask people all the time because I really want to know and I would love. I bet, I don't know, who knows what your answer will be, but like if tomorrow the time was called for you, like, and we're all gathered at a dance party because you are not having like a traditional kind of like service funeral for sure.

Oh, hell no.

It's a.

I bet it's gonna be some cool ass dance party. Woo woo. Shit for sure. But what would you want us all to say about you when we got together?

Oh my goodness.

I left feeling happier every time I talked to her.

Well, that is exactly what I would say about you. Because I do. I do miss Taylor Simpson. I know that you do free meditations too. You have like something that those of you that are listening right now, it's like, yeah, I'm vibing with Taylor for sure. Where can they go to get that and to find you on Instagram and the podcast and all the things.

Yes, all the things, yes. So the meditation, you can go to abundancerewired.com meditation.

It's more than it's so hard to explain. It's a whole DNA. I do light healing so I infuse light frequencies in this meditation and you'll go to a whole other place. If you struggle with meditation or sitting with yourself in silence, just go download this and you'll be swept away into another frequency that you'll have never imagined before. That kind of meditation. So go download that. It's free. Go enjoy it. And then my Instagram is iamtaylor Simpson and then my podcast is a tailored adventure to happiness.

Oh, I'm going to download your meditation too because the next time I have a little tantrum in the middle of the night, forget my insight timer. I'm going to listen to you.

My husband, he read Johnny refuses to listen to it because I so when I channel my voice like changes somewhat and he's like so freaked out about super like alien with it. I'll purposely like play it at night and he's like seven turn it off. He's like, it doesn't sound like you.

That's so cute. My friend is such an honor to know you, to learn from you, to walk this journey with you. I love you so much. Thank you for pouring into not just me, but all the people that are going to listen to this and be blessed by you. I love you so much.

Received. Love you and thank you for having me on and sharing me with your community. So grateful.

Thank you for tuning in to the Becoming Bullet Proof podcast. If you learned a thing or two from our show today, it would mean a lot to me if you shared it and tagged me so I can hear exactly what landed on your heart. This will help me to bring you even more episodes with the topics and guests you want. Please head over to itunes and leave an honest and loving five star review. If this made an impact on you, you can find me on Instagram. Tracyomalley and I have tons of free resources resources for you@traceeomalley.com as always, if you are wanting to ignite your purpose, profits and build your legacy, it's time to stand on the front line of your life and do the work. Let's become bulletproof.