72: Leading, Learning. Laughing, and Loving with an Enneagram Type Seven

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Welcome to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. I am your host, Tracy o'. Malley. I'm a mom to millennials, an author, Enneagram expert and multi million dollar entrepreneur, and master performance and business coach. I've gone from rock bottom to building a bulletproof business and life. If you're looking for the unfiltered transparent truth and ethos, an extra kick in the ass, you will discover that here. Each week I'll be bringing you success stories of high level entrepreneurs as we discover how they became bulletproof and created their empire. You'll learn the story behind the glory along with Enneagram inspired truths so you can ignite your own purpose, profits and build your legacy. It's time for you to become bulletproof. Buckle up. Let's go.

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. And today we are breaking down type 7 on the enneagram, otherwise known as the enthusiast. And let me tell you, they are the most fun type on the Enneagram. They're blast and I'm raising one. So they also challenge me in a lot of ways. They used to. I shouldn't say they do anymore. They're probably my favorite, to be honest with you, because they bring such a excited energy to every situation and there's a reason behind that which would. Which we'll get into.

But the type 7, if you didn't know this already, they fall into the.

Head center of intelligence. And if you've been following along, you know there's three centers of intelligence, Intelligence, the head, the heart, and the body. And the type 7 falls into the head category. So that means they're thinkers. That means that their underlying emotion is fear or anxiety, and their driving force is certainty, some security. And even though they fall in the same center of intelligence as the five and the six, the seven looks a little bit different. And I'll get into that in a second. The good thing about a seven is they can tap into the wing of the six, which is the loyalist, or the eight, which is the challenger, which puts them into the instinctive triad.

You know, Sevens, oh my gosh. When I knew that I was pregnant with a daughter, I was like, oh my gosh. Like, first of all, I'm a tomboy. I am not girly. And I can tell. I could tell just in utero, like carrying her that she had this free spirit. With both my kids, I could tell their personalities, like just in the way that they were when I was carrying them. And I knew that I was going to be birthing this beautiful Free spirit. And sure enough, out comes this incredible little girl that was nothing like me. She looked a lot like me, but she had this different, like, spirit and view even as a little girl. And I knew, like, I didn't know how the hell to deal with that. I didn't even know like, how that person operates because it was so just opposite of me. But I also recognize that, oh my gosh, that, that is something you don't want to diminish. That is something you don't want to cage. Because there is something so infectious and innocent and childlike and fun about that personality. So the enthusiast is the number seven on the Enneagram. And when sevens are healthy, they know that less is more. So these guys are big, huge thinkers. Like.

No stupid idea. There's no stupid ideas. Like they think so outside of the box. So they're super innovative. Like I said, they. They think about things that most of us wouldn't think of. So. So they can be a little over the top. A lot of times early on in their life, they were told they were a little too much or they were a little flaky or kind of out there, not always taken seriously. And so when I get into kind of like where this larger than life kind of thing comes from, it makes sense. But when sevens are healthy, they can kind of rein it in and know that less is more. They don't have to be so over the top or high energy all the time. The healthy sevens are aware that the energy that they have, they don't have. They have that they don't have to manufacture happiness. And they know that that joy is a gift. When they are at the average health, you know, they're getting by. They can turn almost everything that is sad or limiting or failure into something positive. They don't like to feel hard emotions. And because they're in that thinking triad, they can kind of think their way out of things or so they think. When sevens are unhealthy, they see themselves and like their environment as inadequate. They can feel sorry for themselves. They can also believe they maybe were dealt an unfair hand. The main mo, like the main behavior that is very evident in a seven is their desire to avoid pain at any cost. So that can sometimes, like when they're on the real unhealthy spectrum, this can lead to super irresponsible behavior. Instant gratification. They can be a little more reckless.

Not all sevens will fall into this category. But on the Enneagram, this type is most prone to addiction.

But it doesn't mean that they will all turn out that way. But because of their desire to avoid pain and instant gratification, you can kind of see where that would fall hand in hand. Honestly, I would love, like, thank God I am an 8, because now I have a 7 wing. But I'm going to tell you something, like, growing up and until I was about 40, I could not tap into that to save my life. I didn't know what it was. Like, Like, I. I judged them. Even my own daughter sometimes. I mean, I didn't judge her, but I was like, I don't even know how you function. And that is how I pretty much would look at the enthusiast, the Sevens on the Enneagram, I was like, how do you even, like, survive life? But I kind of, like, low key, want to be one. And now that I am healthy.

And really can learn a lot from my own seven that I have raised, I can tap into this. Because when healthy, Sevens probably might be my favorite on the Enneagram because they embody that joy and boundless love and gratitude for life, right? And most days they burst into life like little kids who just found out, like, school's out. So, like, that they're so in the moment and spontaneous that I think even those of us that are a little bit more fixated on some control and being vulnerable and like the threes, the ones, the eights, we look at the sevens like, how in the world, but we low key, really kind of envy the fact that they are so present in the moment and they don't let one ounce of joy pass them by.

Just like with every Enneagram type, though, what's best about their personality can also be like their nemesis. Like, the gift can also be the curse, right? So their compulsive need to have positive experiences and really stimulating events and having fine, fine things to fend off, like the suffering and the pain.

You know, like I said, they can crave stimulation. Like, they're always, like, looking for the next best thing. And that's the problem. Like, there's never enough fun. There's never enough to satisfy them. Sometimes when they're unhealthy.

Their.

Underlying passion. So I've talked about this before with the other Enneagram types. Like, each type has a passion, and for the Sevens, theirs is gluttony. And that doesn't mean, like, they just are savages, but that means they're never satisfied, right? And the opposite of gluttony is sobriety. And it doesn't mean giving up a substance or anything like that. But it's living in the present moment, having self restraint.

Reining in their monkey brain a little bit, and allowing the ordinary to be beautiful as well. You know, the stuff the regular folk like us Eights and the rest of the types have to do.

They believe that the source of their joy is never found within them or in the present moment. So they're always, like, looking for the next best. Even though they can find joy in any situation, to avoid pain, they're always kind of seeking, like, what's next, what's next, what's next? And a lot of times they're looking so forward to something that when they actually get there, they're like, okay, that was anticlimactic. So they're always looking for the next thing.

It's hard to, like when you're looking at a seven, it's hard to imagine that they're. That they. That their underlying emotion is fear or anxiety. Even though they're like the master escapists, like, I know this, but unless you're really understanding kind of what's going on, you just think that they're not afraid of anything because they're so, like, they bound into rooms, they. They'll stand up on stages. They. They're hilarious. Like, they, they will talk to anybody. But they're every bit as fearful as the Fives and Sixes that are also in the head triad. But the way that they're different is the way that they defend themselves against it, right? So the Fives kind of like, avoid fear with knowledge. Sixes do it with their pessimism and their troubleshooting. But the Sevens will avoid their fear, their anxiety, with, like, continuous optimism. Like, they will look for the gold in even a pile of shit, right?

So what happens is, is when they are trying to deny themselves of all these negative feelings, it can cost them their authentic selves. So they start to fool themselves, and no amount of anything can kind of fill that void because they want to avoid fame. Like I said, they believe they can think their way out of it.

You know, it's. It's. It's easier for them to deal with, like, trying to think their way out of it than actually feeling it, right? So for them, worry or stress is easier to deal with, you know, for that. Fear and anxiety is easier to deal with because they can work that out in their minds. But feelings like disappointment or grief or sadness are harder because then they actually have to feel them, right? And that's the last thing that they want.

Honestly, I love that there are Sevens in the world. There's like when they. When they can face the fact that life consists of both agony and ecstasy. That's really when you can see the magic of a 7 shine. But the problem is, too many settle for being like Peter Pan and they never want to grow up, you know, raising a seven who's now, gosh, she's almost 24, which is so crazy to me. I could see this, especially when me as her mother was unhealthy. So when she was, you know, in her early teens, I could see that escapist, you know, because I was such a pain in the ass to be. To be in the house with, you know, because I was intense, and a lot of times it wasn't always positive. So no wonder my beautiful little escapist enthusiast enneagram7 was hightailing it out of there so much. You know, she just did not want to be around for that. But as I've watched her and myself evolve, and she's really witnessed me, like, embrace the full spectrum of emotion. Not just the anger like I used to, but, like the happy, the joy, the sadness, the pain, the disappointment, like, all of it. And she's really watched me process that. To see a healthy seven at such a young age is incredible. And because she is a seven, she does have that ability to tap into the eight wing. And with an eight as a mom, she can harness that really, really well, which has made her a powerful entrepreneur.

So sevens are like the master of, like, reframing things, right? So, like, in a moment, they can take a bad situation and make it into a positive light to kind of avoid the feelings of pain that you and I would experience if the same thing happened to us. So that's why people like being around them, quite honestly, especially people who want to avoid the shit. Not all. Not all. Sevens aren't the only ones that want to avoid pain, right? A lot of us do, but they really do. And so people like to be around that if they can, you know, find the positivity.

And this thing that they do, it becomes so unconscious and instantaneous. And it's honestly quite impressive. Like my daughter, even as a little girl, I remember this is so funny, when I was trying to potty train her, so she was like three and my goodness, like, hilarious. Like, she had a mind of her own for sure. And she got in trouble for something. I can't remember what. And, you know, I was like, I sent her to her room for a few little minutes of time out, and my goodness, was she the cutest thing ever. And I Remember going in there and talking to her and I'm like, casey, you really don't have a choice. You. You have to do this. No, actually, mom, Casey does have a choice. And she goes, and you know what, mom, I love you very much, but right now, I not like you. It was the cutest thing ever.

Here's the thing with sevens, when they're under stress. So a seven under stress takes on the unhealthy one. So that perfectionist, reformer, the improver. And so the unhealthy traits of that one is that, like, real rigid, defensive, critical. So when you call a seven to the carpet and they're under stress, like, especially if they're acting selfish or having a shitty attitude or especially in, if you question their thinking, like, a lot of times sevens aren't taken seriously. And I remember doing this to my daughter, like, if I, if I was, like, cautioning her against making a not so great decision.

They will defend, and they got to have the last word. And, like, they will come up with a million good reasons for doing whatever they want to do, no matter what it will cost them or others.

Because they don't want to feel guilty for being selfish, for having their own things. So they will defend it till the end of the earth. And they don't want to feel stupid because a lot of their, their lives, they've been not taken seriously because they are such big thinkers, right? They love sevens, love to debate ideas. And, you know, occasionally, because they can work a room like nobody else, they can have an inflated sense of their own kind of, like, gift in the world, and they can kind of become a little arrogant if they're not carefree, careful. So they love to debate, and they are so articulate and fast on their feet that they rarely lose even if they're wrong and even if they know they're the master debaters. And I've said this before, my daughter, an enneagram7, is probably the most socially intelligent person I've ever learned from. I, you know, and she doesn't know a lot about, like, a lot of stuff, but she knows how to communicate with people. And people immediately feel comfortable and have a good time. They. They enjoy life when they're around her. And that is the gift of the sevens.

I've said they're. They're the escapologist, you know, they're like magicians. And they always have a backup plan. Like, if they're going out and shit gets boring, they've got a Rolodex for the old school or a text Thread for you younger people of options in case things go sideways. They don't want to be tied down, they need flexibility. They don't like long term commitments, they don't like to be pigeonholed into anything.

You know, they love lots of options. So like taking them to a buffet. Like, my daughter is notorious for ordering like six things on the menu. It drove, it drives me crazy. I'm like, seriously? And she eats like a bite of everything. I'm like, next time you're paying.

Seriously. But they're always living for the next adventure.

You know, she, this is something that's been really important to her and this is a classic example. So she's an entrepreneur and this is very common for sevens. Like they don't want to be locked in. And I know a lot of you are entrepreneurs out there and you know, she is in the beauty industry and she's got a, even at her age, she's got a wide range of certifications and skills and all over the place. And she wants, she's always said, I want to travel all over the world and obviously in that kind of industry to like keep moving and trying to get new business all the time. You know, it was scary for her to go into this. It was the one thing that she didn't want, like, want about this industry. I'm like, well, why don't we think about it this way? And obviously, as she matures and sees like the possibilities in this, you know, she's okay now with having a home base here in Arizona, at least for today. And she's only 24, almost 24, but then taking six or seven weeks off and traveling all over the world. Right. So because they're always living for the next adventure, they don't want to be like stuck anywhere. And so once we kind of like talked about that, ironically, like she started to even thrive more in her business, get more clientele and she's rolling in the cash and so she'll have more options as far as that goes. So if you're a seven out there, or if you love a seven, you know, don't squash their dreams. Seriously, like, you want to drive a seven away? Squash their dreams, tell them their ideas are stupid.

And hear them out. Like, don't interrupt a seven, that's, that's a big no, no, but really listen to them and be excited, as excited as they are for it. And then obviously, like when I was listening to her, I'm like, there's no way you're going to be able to re. Establish you Know a new clientele in every city you go to before you want to move to the next one. You'll be poor, and you won't be able to. To finance your dream of going all over the world. You know, I didn't say that to her in that moment, you know, I was like, oh, my gosh, that sounds so exciting. I'm like, well, maybe think about this. You know, I didn't say you should do this, because that's like putting them in the corner. So even though I knew, like, okay, I need to be able to explain this to her in a way that.

Has her really excited about her dreams, but maybe a way that she can have all of it, right? So that's. If you're a seven. And that's something like, really learning about sevens. Usually sevens as children, they're what, some kind of disconnect. And, you know, you know, by nature, she was always this free spirit, but then, you know, the nurture part of it, like your environment, you know, growing up with me, there was a disconnect. I mean, I was a very good tactical parent when they were little.

But, you know, there was something that she was like, okay, well, we're gonna make fun out of everything. I remember her as a kid saying, mama, our house is a musical. And she would sing everything and dance from to room. And so, like, that was her escape of maybe my energy, even though I wasn't like, this raging crazy person or anything when she was little. But there was definitely an energy to me that I would have wanted to avoid, too, if I was very intense and things like that. And so her way of dealing with that, let's just make this personality that's natural to her sparkle even more. And that's how the escapists really kind of start to.

Take on that even more role. So if you love a seven, they're fun loving, exuberant, like I said, expressive and whimsical. They bring light and joy everywhere they go.

They're positive and upbeat communicators, and they don't like to be bogged down by negative. They really love talking to people who have an open mind. So even politically, my daughter and I have very different views, but what the way that we communicate with each other, we both have an open mind to hear about what the other person has to say. And, like, they love that. Sevens love that.

Sevens can also seem super argumentative, which she can, because they often say the very first thing that comes to their minds, right? And like I said, they love to debate, and sometimes they Sound like they're debating everything, because they're just throwing ideas out there all the time, like, whatever's on their mind. Like, think of brain dump. And that is what sevens do. So conversations are always an opportunity for them to brainstorm. Like, when they're communicating, it is like they're having a brainstorm session. And I had to learn that because whenever not just my daughter, but any seven would speak, I'm like, oh, my God. Like, they're like, no wonder. I thought they were all over the place. But now that I understand that, that's their way of, like, processing all their stuff out. So let them roll. Let them roll. You want them to eventually land the plane, if you know what I'm saying. Like, bottom line, I've said that to her before. I'm like, okay, I don't need all the labor. Just give me the baby. Just give me the baby. But you want to do that with respect, and you don't want to minimize kind of their ideas, because quite honestly, they think of things that nobody else does, and their ideas are what change the world.

Their joyful demeanor, and I've heard this a lot from Sevens, can cause others to assume that they are never hurt by stinging comments or that you don't hurt their feelings, but that's because they just don't show it. They do have feelings, and.

They feel things very, very deep, but they don't communicate, or they try not to think about them, but they carry that in their heart. I want you to know that even if they make a joke about it or laugh their way through.

Negative emotions are hard for them to think about. So even though they're normal.

In a healthy, romantic relationship, sometimes they need to process that before they share, you know, so if you're in a relationship or love a seven, knowing that is really, really important.

They also sometimes have a hard time with conflict because it requires kind of going into the negativity that they work so hard to avoid. So if they realize that conflict is inevitable, they like to stay on the bright side and clear things up as quickly as possible so that they can get back to their happy and peaceful existence. And I know when they're in a situation or a tense situation, they're usually the ones that will try and make jokes to ease it, ease the tension.

And when they're not healthy, they have a hard time admitting and owning that their words and actions can hurt somebody. Like, if they're being dismissive or joking, like, even if they're joking, even though that's their way of Avoiding pain, it can be hurtful to others, especially if it's something that's really important, and hard emotions that other people want to process.

So it's awesome when you can see a healthy 7 engage in the wide spectrum of the emotions. So if you're loving a 7.

A lot of times they'll avoid that because they don't want to admit that they hurt you. Because they really do want to make everybody happy, not just themselves, but they really want to make everybody happy and they don't want to fail their partner. Intimacy and a seven. They don't really and readily trust everyone with their emotional needs. So sharing them, sometimes.

When they do share them, that is where real emotional intimacy happens for them. Because sevens tend to have so many interests and feel connected to their partner. When they're able to talk about all their hobbies with them, that's how they feel connected. They really, really do. So if you have. If you love a seven and you know this, know that they are going to, like, love all types of music, all types of food, like, everything gluttony, right? And the more things that you, even if it's not your thing, but you'll share that experience with them. So, like, my daughter loves all type of music and, like, loves music festivals. I can't stand music festivals. Like, it's like my worst nightmare. But when she's excited about it, sometimes I'll look up the artist or I'll listen to some of the music, even if I don't love it. But showing just that initiative that I'm interested in it because she is and I want to learn about it. That has gone a long way. She. She did play some sports as a little girl, but more for the experience. She could give a shit about the actual sports and winning. She just wanted to be part of something. Like when she played softball, she was, like, loving all the cheers. When she played soccer, she just wanted to run around with her friends holding hands, like it was all about the experience. So recognizing that, I was like, honey, you don't have to do sports just because mom loves sports. Like, what do you want to do? And that's when she got into theater and dance and singing. And I suck at all three of those. But because that was what was exciting to her, I really, really, really tried to understand it. And I was participating. I was like, helping out. And that goes a long way to a seven. So if you love one, whether you're parenting them or in love with one or partnered with one, when you show an interest in things that they're excited about. That's when they relax and let their guard down and you'll see a more softer side and they will enjoy the more quiet moments. So, like, I'm more introverted. And because I do show such an interest in all the things that she loves, she'll chill on the couch with me and watch dateline or law and order and just chill out. So that's where that emotional connection. So if you love a 7, just know you're going to be in for a wild ride. And then. And they will be, you know, talking at rapid speeds. But be excited for them because you never know what they may introduce you to something that you never would have thought would excite you, but it actually does. And I will say this. My daughter, my seven, has taught me more than anybody else in the entire world because as somebody who grew up very rigid and with a lot of intense energy, that refreshing free spirit, wide open mind of all sorts of things, that anything's possible and anything's exciting, she's really introduced me to a lot of cool shit. So, you know, even though they might drive you crazy and you wonder how the hell they function, and they seem like they're all over the place and even irresponsible at sometimes. They have gifts that you need, and I encourage you to just pour so much love into them and embrace that, because when you do, they're more likely to take on some of your healthy traits. So, like, my badass daughter is pretty damn responsible and has a work ethic like nobody's business. And I know that she learned that from me, and she was open to learning from me because I let her be her. So when you're loving a seven, do that. So even though they may take a little time to emotionally commit, once they do, they are so deep, they are loyal and they can be more emotionally expressive. And because they are the seven, they also have that. That tap into the six wing, which is the loyalist. Right. So final thoughts. For being in a relationship with a 7, it's important that they feel you want to be present with them in the fun things. So if they drag you to a music festival like she already knows, that's I'm not the person for that. I'll do the other fun stuff, but I'm not the person for that. But if you're in a relationship with one, being present with them in the fun things.

You know.

They often feel like others are trying to get them to live in the present so much, but the present doesn't offer anything Interesting or engaging, even though they're enjoying, whenever they're there, they're always like going for the next thing. So show that you care by being engaged and authentic with them in whatever moment they're in. When you show the enthusiast that they are loved by surprising them with a fun activity like that, that's a good, like a fun activity, time spent, quality time, experiences. Make sure to appreciate their humor and their exuberance along the way because you will bring out the best in your seven when you actually enjoy that part of them. So now if you're leading a seven, so a seven in business, you know, they're the innovative, optimistic, visionary and they're focused on the future. And when you think about it like this, innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower, quite honestly. And that, that quote was from Steve jobs, you know, Mr. Apple Guy, because they are so innovative and innovation is what drives this world like the future. You know, a lot of the things that they're developing now, especially in the world we live in now, I mean, we're having to think so outside the box. So having a seven in your organization, if you're lead one or you are a seven leader, they want more than anything to feel good. Like I said, they're the adventure. They excel at finding unexpected connections between things and they also are masters at charming people with their fast paced and flexible thinking. And their attention automatically goes to what sounds fun, exciting and intellectually stimulating. So if you're trying to build a team culture, especially with a healthy seven, this is the person you want driving culture. As long as they're healthy, right? Because they can go off on a tangent and you'll never recover. But because they bring this excitement to a culture, this is one of the most important things in business is culture and environment is stronger than willpower. So if you have a healthy seven in your organization or your leading one, let them lean into that gift. This is their superpower, right? So their style is shaped by an intolerance of limitations. So it's really important if you're leading one, that they feel free to do what they want and feel how they want to feel and to have a lot of choices around options. And they want to avoid outside constraints at any time or of any kind either. So if you have a seven that you're leading, like giving them spreadsheets and paperwork, you might as well just expect them to call in sick or half ass shit. Like this is not their superpower and that is not a role you want them in. That's what you want to give to a one, right? The Ones or the Sixes are the spreadsheet people. The Sevens, they are your innovators. They're big ideas, the culture people. And because their speaking style is so quick and spontaneous and their words are like coming out like a canon, they tell engaging stories and they can shift from one topic to another. So they're very talkative, they love to interact with people and engage with them about all different subjects. So this is really good for client relations too, because they'll want to hear about other people and every new person is something exciting. So because they look at the bright side, you know, that's really good for client relations too. As leaders, the Sevens are gifted at brainstorming and envisioning what might be possible because their mind is like boundary free. This is what makes them so good at generating so many ideas. So when you're dealing with the seven, you want them part of like a board or.

A tart, you know, if market research, you want them to be part of all these ideas.

And give them that freedom to come up with all these ideas. And when you harness that or not harness that, when you allow them to do that and.

Allow them to make connections between all these different ideas without any limits, you're going to bring out the best in them because they tend to be visionaries and they have a talent for seeing new possibilities. So it's really, really important. They also might be really good networkers and service oriented cheerleaders, the dreamers. But let them be them. Let them be them. You know, the healthy part of the seven can tack. When they're in a growth pattern, they take on the healthy traits of the five, which is that investigator. So this is where like the more streamlined Seven can come in, where they are more organized. They aren't just like, you know, flying off their the cuff here. Like they actually are more thought through. But you never want to, like you never want to cage that boundary free brain. You really, really don't. That is their superpower.

It's amazing. It's amazing to watch. So some of the things about the type 7 in business.

Because their brain definitely looks for positive data and positive elements of their work. They love, you know, envisioning future possibilities, which is really important in business. Thinking ahead. They. This is where they can get into trouble from time to time in business. Is that.

The shiny object syndrome, you know, the squirrel like, oh, they can get distracted. So helping them kind of stay streamlined in that without caging their beautiful free spiritual. They're fascinated by interesting people. So Clients, events.

They're interested in all different things, but sometimes they won't go very deep into any of them. So especially in business, if you are an entrepreneur and you're trying to niche down, this is hard for seven sometimes. Or they'll have five different niches and they'll change it. Like, one day it can be health, the next day it can be sales. The next day it can be being a speaker, you know, and that's okay.

Knowing that. But the goal if you're a seven, is to really master one at a time, right? It's okay. Like, I want you, if you're a seven or you're leading a seven, to know that they may have all different kinds of exciting things, but the way to lead them is like, okay, I promise you, you don't have to stay here forever, but let's master this and crush this right now. And once we crush it, we can move on to the next thing. That almost encourages them to crush it a little faster, knowing that they're not going to be stuck here. That's been really, really important. When I'm leading sevens or teaching sevens.

They keep positive energy in the workspace. So if you're leading them, that's really cool. Especially, you know, if you have bad morale. Sevens can kind of lighten that up.

They also, because of that, they turn positives out of. They reframe the negatives into positives. They rarely complain about their work because their brain emphasizes the positive all the time.

Because they don't like to be limited or constrained in any way. You know, giving them new things to do is really, really exciting and you'll bring out the best in them. And if you are a 7 in entrepreneurship, like I said, crush something and know that you're not going to ever be stuck there. The niches are in the riches. So master a niche and then once you crush it, move on to the next one. You have permission. My sevens out there.

Knowing that you don't love to deal with unpleasant emotions, I really want you to ask yourself, why? What's going on? Because. Because when you can deal with the wide range of the emotions, that will make you even better because you have that positive energy anyway. So, like, watching my daughter be. Be able to not just navigate her own harder emotions, but she's that person that people come to.

Sevens are amazing at winging it. So, like, they're not afraid to look stupid. And so they'll fake it till they make it. They'll figure it out, give them lots of options. They don't Love hierarchies. They'll make friends with everybody.

But they don't want to necessarily be caged. Right. So if you are leading one, if you're their boss, at least give them the illusion they have all this freedom and that will go a long way with them. They like being in leadership positions that involve generating innovative ideas. So like I said, the market researchers, the the ones that can come up with new ideas and have an open mind with all the crazy ideas that they will come up with, it's really, really fun to see what they can come up with. You know what I've heard from a lot of sevens is because they're so positive all the time when they have a hard day.

And rarely you will see that, but they'll share that with people that they trust. I'll hear that from sevens a few times. And they know because I'm an 8 and can space like that, they'll say like a lot of their friends, co workers, people in their life like don't know how to deal with them if they're having a bad day because they're always the go to person for positivity.

So it's awesome when I see one, when I see a seven, like express to me like they're having a hard day because that is kind of my superpower is helping navigate hard feelings and things like that.

If a seven comes to you. So if you love lead parent to seven if they come to you with hard emotions, take it very seriously and don't minimize it and really help them process it and let them know it's okay and don't just brush it off because that will encourage their.

Escapism even more. But really especially if you are one of the types that really. So like fours and eights with, with a 7 can be really great for them. We can show them what processing emotions look like. All the types can. But like fours and eights are pretty, pretty darn good at it. But if you have a seven that comes to you, that means they trust you first and foremost that it's safe to be them. They trust that maybe you can even help them with that. And don't be flippant with it, it's really, really important. So the superpowers of the seven at work, like I said, the positivity, the imaginative thinking, they're super fast paced so they can be on to move things and not get bogged down. Whether they're leading a meeting or planning projects, burning through a to do list. They're enthusiastic supporters so they're Great in teams.

Inspiring leaders that motivate people through their pure enjoyment of doing whatever work they're doing. So like if you are an entrepreneur and you're in a niche right now that just be in love with it and that's why you are able to crush it as fast as you are. Because in three, enthusiasm and confidence sells and that is a gift of a seven. So go all in with it, y'. All. And if you're leading one, let them lean into that. They're forward thinking, embrace that.

And they, they're great at celebrating successes. I suck at this. I suck at this. So watching sevens really celebrate the success because it's so important, especially in business. It's in, it's, it's my biggest as a leader, hands down. And I love watching sevens do this. It's a way of reinforcing what works and sevens do it so well. And even though they'll do it for themselves, they'll do it so much for everybody else as well.

You know, the stressed out sevens can be easily distracted, so keeping them with something exciting to do will be really, really important. And for, you know, leaders that are leading them that really don't want to do that, it's going to be really important that you do. Otherwise they can become erratic and unfocused.

The goal with your sevens, whether you're loving and leading, caring about them.

Parenting 1, is to help them learn how to feel all their emotions all the way to their depths, even when they're painful, instead of just skimming the surface of them.

Because otherwise, I mean, it all catches up. We all know this, right? We all know it catches up to us.

If you're a 7, this is what you can do to be easier to work with, right? So.

You need to understand that not everyone moves as fast as you do. So understanding that like as an 8, I know how my energy affects people. So it's really important as a seven to understand that not everybody's going to be like all over the place like you are. So knowing who your audience is, whether it's you're an entrepreneur in a workplace like downshifting to allow others to catch up or adjust their speed.

Will be really, really cool. So even though you love brainstorming and having creative ideas, make sure that you understand that some of your teammates and co workers might feel overwhelmed by your firing of all these good ideas. I know that like before I really understood the enneagra, I was like annoyed by it. I'm just going to be real honest. But now I realize that when I've got somebody like that in the room, like, okay, buckle up because they're about to fire a bunch of really kick ass ideas and there's going to be something golden in there. But as a seven, it's important that you know that so you'll make it easier on the people you work with if you can clarify that.

Although you like to throw out all these ideas, you are very aware that not all of them need to be implemented. You're just like firing out whatever's on your brain. So when you kind of let your people know that you know this, that will allow them to not be like, oh my God, like finish already. So that's really, really important. If you're a seven, know that we know that you pay attention to your own inner thoughts a lot, but really understanding that you got a bunch of other people around and not that that's a bad thing to think about yourself, but really intentionally take others needs into account as well, will go a long way, especially if you want people to be receptive to all the gifts that you have. You know, everything's about, you know, even energy exchange and, and give and take. So it's really, really important.

We know sevens that you're sensitive to being limited by others. So it's really good for seven leaders to be aware that they may react negativity negatively to some constraints. So be very mindful of how you manage your reactions to stuff.

And how you may question authority. Just, you know, pause before reacting sometimes will be really, really important for you Sevens. And be aware that sometimes you guys, I see it a lot. My daughter's done it. I've watched lots of sevens do this that you know your way around of limiting restrictions. This is where like your freaking charming personality can really. And people will look at you like, oh, the rules don't apply to you, right? Because a lot of sevens don't think they don't want the rules to apply to them. So sometimes you'll try to get around that with your humor, your intellectual manipulation. And you're so quick on your feet with, with communicating that you know all this stuff, you're like, okay, how did that happen? Right? And you'd rather do that than pick a fight. So it's pretty, pretty cool.

You know, sevens really have gotten a bad rap along for a long, long time. And you know, as children and I think especially in the world where we want everything to look freaking perfect and all of that, we really do.

Really do a disservice sometimes to the sevens because you Know, these are the people that can change the world. And I don't know what we would do in the world without sevens because they bring so much joy to lives and they. That, like, who else but the Sevens awaken that. That childlike wonder and rescue us from taking ourselves so seriously. I laugh more with the sevens and Lord knows my life. I needed that my entire life. And I know that's why I was blessed. I knew, like, I was gonna get a seven in the form of a little girl. Like, no shit. That's exactly what I needed, to not take life so seriously and help me appreciate the miracle of life. Like, she. She absolutely has me living in the moment. And it was because of her, like, quite honestly. And this is why, like, if you're loving, leading, learning from a seven, like, you will laugh with a seven all day long. So I don't even have to go there. And you can even laugh at. They're like, all like, I'm like, what is happening in that brain of yours? But not in a judgy way. Like, I laugh like, God, if I had even an ounce of that spinning going on in my head, I can't even imagine.

But I know, like, I would not be doing what I'm doing in the world today if it wasn't for my own seven that I was blessed with. When she was four years old, I recognized that part of her, that seven in her. And because I never had the opportunity to have a voice of my own or express myself or have that childlike wonder, and I was seeing this come out in my own little seven daughter, I was angry and I didn't want to take it out on her. And I knew, I knew from that moment, like, I knew this free spirit, but I didn't know how to navigate that because I had no idea. But I also knew that I didn't want to cage it either. And so I. That's when I started 20 years ago, really diving into my own personal development. And it's why I've continued and she is why I studied the Enneagram, because I did not. Like, I loved her and I respected her and I loved that part of her, but I did not know what to do with it. And I didn't understand how to communicate with her. And so eight years ago is why I started the Enneagram is because of my own enthusiast 7 daughter. So they are the best. We'll just tell them that, okay? They're the most fun. They change the world. So if you love lead parent seven, Yes, I know that they can be challenging, especially if you are not like them. And I know they can be a bit much sometimes, but allow their gifts to shine and let them, let them be them and they will pick up. They'll be a lot more likely to learn from you too. Which is, which is fantastic because if we can get a little bit of the fun and they can get a little bit of the structure, like the possibilities are endless. And when you can work together and love together and lead together and parent together, that's where the secret sauce is. So yeah. And if you don't know your enneagram type and you are intrigued by this, or maybe you are a seven or you lead a seven or you don't know if you're a seven or you want to know all the things, book a typing session with me. I would love to talk to you. You can go to Tracy O' Malley.com@the work with Me section. I spend a lot of my day kind of talking about the Enneagram and really sharing like how you can integrate the information of the Enneagram to really do some great things in your life, whether it's in love, in parenting, in your health, in business, all the things. And yeah, if we do it in businesses and organizations as well. And I would love to help you. This tool, hands down greatest personal development tool in the world, I think I love.

Is fantastic. So if you want more information, go to traceyomalley.com you can find me @traceyomall on Instagram and I would love to help you kind of find your way back to you. It's amazing. And until then, here's to Becoming Bulletproof.

Thank you for tuning in to the Becoming Bulletproof podcast. If you learned a thing or two from our show today, it would mean a lot to me if you shared it and tagged me so I can hear exactly what landed on your heart. This will help me to break you even more episodes with the topics and guests you want. Please head over to itunes and leave an honest and loving five star review. If this made an impact on you, you can find me on Instagram traceyomalley and I have tons of free resources for you@traceyomalley.com as always, if you are wanting to ignite your purpose, profits and build your legacy, it's time to stand on the front line of your life and do the work. Let's. Let's become Bulletproof.