EP184: The Anatomy of Your Enneagram Type: The Enneagram FIVE—Introverts Can ‘People’ Too!

Welcome to the Leadership Formula podcast where you will learn the secret sauce behind achieving massive success. I'm your host, Tracy o', Malley, multimillion dollar entrepreneur, your Enneagram expert, master performance coach and mom to millennials. Do you want deep, meaningful relationships? To wake up every day with purpose and make money doing something you love? Well, you've landed in the right place. Every week I will teach you how to get exactly what you want in life by strengthening your emotional intelligence. Using a combination of the Enneagram framework, live life coaching sessions, and real talk from yours truly. It's time to transform yourself into the ultimate leader of your life.

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Hello and welcome back to our series.

On the anatomy of your Enneagram type. And today we will be focusing on the Enneagram 5, otherwise known as the investigator, the quiet specialist, the most introverted on the Enneagram. And this type falls into the thinking center of intelligence, which means they process, they communicate based on their thoughts and things that run through their head. And quite honestly, there is not another type that uses probably their brain more than the enneagram 5. And I am coming off a beautiful week of tons of typing sessions. I think I did six throughout the week alongside, you know, my one on one coaching and my Enneagram experience coaching that I do. The very beginning of your journey starts with getting typed properly. And you know, I've said this before and you know, I think sometimes I surprise myself and I'm sure some of you think I say this just so you guys really get with me for a typing session. But you guys, I use a paid typing assessment in order to start the ball rolling. And out of the six Enneagram type sessions I did this week, five of them were inaccurate. And to use the beautiful framework that is the Enneagram for growth, for compassion, for yourself, for understanding, for anything that you desire, you got to have the right information. And getting typed properly is absolutely your first step. So if you have already taken an assessment and things maybe aren't making much sense, or it's not, you know, having the oomph that you want in understanding the Enneagram, I highly, highly, highly recommend you do a kickstart session with me. Even if you think you are typed properly, how about we give it a shot and go from there? Because the ahas, the tears, the feelings of all the people that I worked with this week feeling so understood and seen and all of a sudden things made a hell of a lot more sense in a way that they could actually move forward, move the needle in their life, professionally and personally and in their families. It. It was a beautiful, beautiful week. You can go to Tracy o' the Work With Me section, click on the little Enneagram kickstart session, and we can dive in. Even if you think you know your Enneagram type, I highly, highly, highly recommend you doing that, because I don't just focus on your type. I go through your anatomy, and also I give you lots of integration tools to carry on with the power of the Enneagram. So back to the Enneagram 5. We are going to talk about the Enneagram 5. It isn't just your core type. I know a lot of you focus on just your core type, which is a great, great start. But there are four other tools in your tool belt based on your Enneagram type. And obviously today we're going to talk about the tools for the Five and the framework and anatomy of the Fives type. But when you know how to use the other four types connected to you, that's where the explosive growth happens. That's where you know all the juicy parts of life that you desire are waiting for you. And so today with the Enneagram 5, the quiet specialist, the investigator, this happens to be a number that is connected to my type, so I know it very well. And I have often said if I had to pick one Enneagram type to be stuck on an island with, I would probably pick a Five. They are brilliant. They look at things in a way that most don't. They are often misunderstood because of their introverted ways. And I'm kind of introverted, too. So I have a soft spot for the enneagram 5. And because it is the stress number of mine, I really see them and understand kind of where they go and have a lot of compassion for them as well, and how hard it can be. Even though they are the type that has the strongest ability to detach emotionally, that is their gift as well as their Kryptonite. And I will dive into what that looks like. So the Enneagram Fives have the motivational need to know and to understand. They need certainty that they're going to be equipped and capable with resources, with energy. Fives value making sense of the world around them, and as a result, objectivity and knowledge are important to them. Anytime I Type an enneagram 5, I often joke with them. I'm like, listen, I know this information. You want to know all the things. Like, they are the epitome of. Give me all the things I tell them. Please do not stay up all night going down the rabbit hole of Google and your Enneagram type. And every single one of them do I laugh because I know that they're going to. Enneagram Fives strive for independence, appreciate privacy and tend to conserve their resources to ensure future independence. It's a lot of times why even though they are so wise and smart and know so many, that because they're worried that they will be depleted energetically or resourcefully. That's kind of where they go into that introverted nature and their private selves. Right. When they're at their best, though, others experience the enneagram5 as visionary and mindful. They offer the gift of non attachment, non emotional attachment to themselves in the world. That's why they're really great also in the workplace and professionally. Because when emotions can run high or feelings can get in the way, you know, Fives can seriously completely separate from that. But you can also see where that can cause some friction and we'll get into that. Others might experience an enneagram 5 as stingy, intellectually arrogant and disconnected from their heart as they retreat into their mind to avoid being engulfed or intruded on or depleted. Right. So you know, a lot of times people can feel like they're abandoning, you know, this is my stress number. So I am very aware of how that can make others feel. And to be, you know, it's. I'm not going to change who I am necessarily, but how I express that, you know, can. And so if you are an enneagram5 or you love or lead them, knowing that they do need some quiet time, they're never going to be the one, you know, planning the office party or they're very rarely the first to say, hey, let's all get together. They're scared, slow to commit too, because what if they don't energetically feel up for it that day, Right. So being really mindful of their need for certainty that they will have all their resources and energy. So the gifts of the enneagram5, and you've heard me talk about this before, for each Enneagram type, their gift can also be their Kryptonite, right? So this the same things that make you amazing are also the same things that can take you out. The difference is, is when it's coming from love, compassion, empathy, service, grace, wisdom, that's when they're gifts, right? And when we are in a place of fear, insecurity, unworthiness, shame, guilt or ego, that's when these very gifts turn into the Kryptonite or the wrecking ball in your life. So the gifts of the Enneagram 5, they're very perceptive. They offer objective, in depth and insightful observations of situations and information. They can hold common, complex problems and data and it doesn't overwhelm them. Like more data doesn't necessarily overwhelm them. But you can see where this perceptiveness can get them into trouble, especially if they're not feeling secure, is they might be stuck in the information gathering process, right, the investigative process, which can hold them back from action. They're very curious. Their interests and intellectual ideals enable the enneagram 5 to explore and build expertise in a variety of fields, especially random ones and different topics and theories. This is why like if you have or you lead or love an enneagram 5, giving them a specific task or subject to investigate, they will be happy as a pig in shit to kind of go down that rabbit hole. This curiosity can get them in a position though where they have procrastinated so long that their backs are up against the wall. And that can really wreak havoc on their relationships, on their performance in work, their participation in relationships. Another gift of the enneagram 5 is they're unsentimental. Right? They approach life in an unsentimental way and can put emotions aside when needed. Super, super big strength. You can also see where this can get them in a lot of trouble. There's times we do need to be in our heart space. This is why, like when Fives do air quote mindset work, this is why I have a very hard time. All the mindset work that's out there, especially for an enneagram 5, because it can detach you from your heart space. And the real growth happens when we do the mindset and the heart set and the soul set work. The Enneagram 5 have no problem with the mindset part of it. It's getting into their hearts that they can get challenged. They're very self sufficient independence. You will very rarely have to Micromanage an enneagram 5. They'll protect their autonomy and privacy. They prefer to ask little of others and are able to minimize their own needs, which like, you know, that can be really, really great because you don't have to be in their shit and their business all the time. That being said, you can forget about them. And because they're in that kind of autonomy and rabbit hole and independence, yeah, they, they won't always ask for what they need. They won't say, hey, I'm buried here. Can you can you help me, right? Enneagram Fives are also very inventive. They have an unconventional knack for outside the box. Ideas and depth of knowledge enable them to be inventive, visionary, pioneering, innovative, very, very cool. Again in the rabbit hole. Keeps them from taking action. They have it all stored up in their head, but very rarely will they feel it or take action. And when I get into their growth and their stress numbers, you how this can help them, right? Like where they can be in these gifts, you know, when a five goes down a dark side, they take on the enneagram7, which you would think might be great. You know, this introverted, investigative, quiet specialist. You would think that maybe going to the enneagram 7 would be a growth number. Quite the opposite. It's when they have taken in all this information and their brain is full, completely full, brain is overloaded and the overwhelm kicks in and they know they, you know, haven't gotten to projects. They know they are abandoning relationships. They, you know, their health is taking a shit in a way to disassociate, you know, because the seven, they want to avoid pain and hard things. So when a 5 is overwhelmed, they don't want to feel things either. So they can kind of really be disassociative. They can all of a sudden look very extroverted and participating in things. But this is where discernment, if you are in enneagram 5, will be really, really important. And when I talk about your growth number, you will see why. But this not wanting to have pain or feeling, they want to stay disassociated from things. This can cause them to become unfocused or all over the place. But they may do this internally, right inside, where you may not even recognize that they are in that 7 zone, especially the self preservation 5. You probably won't see them externally. But Even though the 7 is the enthusiast, it doesn't necessarily mean that they're, you know, the life of the party. But this frantic kind of brain overload and avoiding of pain is kind of what this looks like. All right, so the growth number for the five, this is why I end up working with a lot of Fives, because they can feel that they have this in them, but they're not sure how to access this. Because an enneagram 5 in a growth pattern has them looking like a healthy eight, right? All of a sudden this quiet specialist becomes this protective challenger in the world. And the eight is the biggest energetic action taker on the entire Enneagram. And because this is a challenge for the five. You can see where they won't naturally ever go there ever. They will never say, hey, let me fight this fight publicly, or let me use all this big energy to fight a cause or to stand up for something, because in their mind, they're worried that they're going to be energetically depleted. And this is where the wings come into play. The wings are the superhero of every single Enneagram type, because in order for each Enneagram type to get to their growth number, it's their biggest stretch. It's the thing that's probably most uncomfortable for them. And without the assistance of the wings, very rarely will it happen. We might get close, but then we'll, like, pull back or we'll sabotage or we'll procrastinate. And so as an Enneagram five, on one side you have the four wing, and on the other side, you have the six wing. And I've said this before, like, a lot of you lean heavy one way or the other. One of them is usually a harder stretch for you. Some Fives, probably more than any other Enneagram type, have a hard time leaning into any other of the wings. But what I usually tell people that are fives or love or lead Fives is, you know, you guys are the information junkies. You take in all the information. You don't really step into the feeling part of it. And so although you're taking action, especially the entrepreneurial five, or the one that is in a leadership position, knowing that you have to have intrapersonal skills and interpersonal skills, it isn't a natural go to for you. So as you're building a case, which is like what I like to say the fives can do and where I go when I'm under stress. When you're building a case, that doesn't always mean any of your innovative, visionary ideas will ever come to play. Right? You're just the gatherer of information. And if you just stay stuck in that information gathering. You've heard me say this millions of times on this podcast. Information doesn't equal transformation. And although fives know all the things, it doesn't mean that anything happens when they do. And so what I'll usually tell a five is to kind of check in with their six wing. Right? Okay. This is something that is exciting. I'm a business owner. I'm an entrepreneur. What things do I need to troubleshoot? What kind of other plans do I need to have into place? Right. Plan A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Right. Really, really Important. And the gift of the Six is that troubleshooting their need for certainty, their need to not get blindsided, right? So they're a little bit more of the collaborative Enneagram type. They're called the loyal skeptic. You know, they are the loyalist. They are better about working with others. And so for the Five that can be challenged by that, leaning into the Enneagram 6 is really, really awesome. That being said, the Enneagram 6 is also in the thinking center of intelligence. And they also could go down the rabbit hole of worst case scenario. So you want to be able tap into that beautiful energy and tactical strategical part of the six. But how you get to the heart space maybe is still a stretch for you. The good news is, is for the Enneagram 5. The other side is the Enneagram 4, which is the individualist. They're the most intuitive on the Enneagram. They can hold the most emotional capacity on the Enneagram, which is, you know, almost completely polar opposite of the 5, right? And so an Enneagram 5 can lean into the healthy parts of the Enneagram 4. When the 5 and even the 6 wing want to be stuck in information and tactical strategy, we still need to get into our heart and feelings, right? And there is not a type on the Enneagram that feels more than the Enneagram 4. And the Enneagram 4, being the individualist, they don't seek their significance outside of themselves. And so the introverted Five can really lean into this more like, what do I really want? I don't have to think about anybody else, but what do I really want? Where is my creativity in this? That creative, artistic, musical storytelling part of the human nature can reside in the enneagram 4. So if a 5 can access it after kind of troubleshooting it and using the emotional heart space of the Four and the the creative energy you can see when a 5 is kind of tag teamed by the 4 and 6 wing, the ability to be more decisive like an enneagram 8, and step into, you know, taking big, huge, energetic action like an 8 can. The only way a 5 can really access it is with the help of their Four Wing and their Six Wing. Some of the blind spots of the Five, their ability to detach from feelings and practice objective thinking can come at the expense of the interpersonal warmth. And even when Fives feel warmth, this may not be apparent to others. It's hard to feel the heart energy of a 5 because they don't verbalize it very much. And because they don't really go into the heart space as natural as maybe some of the other types. You might not feel it when they're in the field. That's what I usually say for a Five to kind of check in with that four wing and check in with what they're feeling and learn how to maybe articulate that verbally. And also articulating their need for their quiet time and their introverted stuff. You don't want to use that as a crutch. But using your words to let people know what you need and what you require to be your very best will help you eliminate people trying to force you or having some hurt feelings and some wreckage left in the path of your Fiveness. And another blind spot for the Fives is in trying to explain information and share your expertise. You can sometimes come across as patronizing, like I said, intellectually arrogant. And this can shut people down or make it difficult for them to understand and pay attention to what a 5 is trying to say. I am fascinated by the 5, and I kind of know what's happening when it's happening. But being mindful, if you are a Five or if you love or lead a Five, when you're asking them to kind of maybe go down and research a ton of stuff, is tell them, hey, remember you're going to be educating those of us that aren't as smart and wise as you. So it will be really important that you kind of put this in the book for dummies kind of thing. For Fives in relationships, commitment does not come easily to a Five. When they commit to a relationship, it might feel as if they have to open themselves to the pain of the relationships, whereas solitude is not painful. That's kind of where they can go into that unhealthy 7. 2 is the avoidance of it. This can lead to subconscious patterns of thinking in which relationships and commitments are equated with pain and struggle and cycles of. Of wanting contact and wanting to be alone. They can feel very conflicted because they do, just like the Eight. They want connection. But that vulnerability, not emotional vulnerability, so to speak, but this energetic vulnerability is. Is something that, you know, they have to be mindful of. Fives are fiercely protective of their time and resources, essentially hoarding them. This might seem like prudence to the Five, but may be regarded as greed by others. It's also known as avarice, this need to hoard their energy and resources. So the other part that comes into play is this instinctual reaction and response to life. And I've told you guys this before that. Next to trauma, I think the instincts of the Enneagram are the number one reason why so many are mistyped. A lot of the assessments don't take how we instantly, instinctually are driven that are these are essential for human experience. And although artificial intelligence is fantastic, this part doesn't get kind of articulated in any of those assessments. We have the self preservation five, the one on one five, and the social five, the self preservation. When life happens, they go to preserve their body, focus on physical safety, well being, material security and comfort. The one on one subtype has this drive to protect themselves in the environment. And so this one on one forms alliances to extend themselves, you know, through intimacy. This instinct focuses on intensity of experiences. And then there's the social subtype and the social instinct to get along with others and form secure social bonds. This can have them focusing on interactions and relationships with communities and in groups. This subtype looks unique to the five, for sure. Okay, so I've told you guys that, you know, within each of these subtypes, there's one that doesn't quite look like the others. I'm guessing you can kind of see which one that would be. And that would be the one on one five. That need for intensity, it kind of goes against what a typical five might want, is that, you know, conserving that energy. But A Self Preservation 5 is very, very protective of personal space and privacy. If you're a Self Preservation 5, they set clear limits and boundaries and is very comfortable living in a relatively solitary life with just a few close friends. My mom is a self preservation 5. The self preservation 5 would much rather observe social life than to participate in it. They're truly the most introverted of all and they prefer not to reveal much of their inner self. They find it difficult to lower their guard for fear of losing their privacy or sense of safety. Now, that one on one five, this is the one that doesn't typically look like your stereotypes of a five or the memes of a five. The typically cool, analytical five in the one on one five connects to passion in this subtype. Focusing that passion on one or two people in an otherwise pretty reserved life. And this five experiences strong chemistry with another person. This is where this type of 5 can become extremely codependent if they're not careful. They enjoy the connection and trust and openness that this permits. It's how they feel like they're connected to the world. But it's only usually through one or two people they risk depending on this other person. Like I said, Codependency. This is the part of the five that can really get stuck in that. And this can make them feel vibrant and alive. Leading them this, this is where they can test their partner's loyalty or resist sharing them with others. And finally, the social subtype of the enneagram5 searches for the essence of meaning of situations with a focus on the big questions. As they pursue wisdom and knowledge, they connect with groups or experts who share their brilliance and high ideals. This is kind of where they will kind of vet people to make sure, like, they believe they're on the same level as them, right? They want to know that they're not going to be dumbed down. This social five is often disconnected from everyday issues or emotions. And while sharing values and ideals with energy and enthusiasm, they may resist sharing space, time or inner resources, disconnecting them from the very people around them. And, you know, fives can be challenging to lead. Especially, you know, this is where the five and the eight really do kind of see each other in ways that the other types don't. Whereas the 8 is kind of always scanning for vulnerabilities, the 5 is too, but. But more their resources. The aid is scanning for vulnerabilities in a protective way of violation or betrayal. And so, you know, a lot of fives don't end up in the entrepreneurial space. Or they. This is what happens to a five. A lot of times is they believe that they can do things better. They like to be behind the scenes most of the time. But if they've worked with or for someone that they don't think can really do what they do, they can become intellectually arrogant and think, I can do this better than them. And then they venture into this entrepreneurial space and then they realize, oh shit, like, I still have to be the face of this. I can't hide out from time to time. Are you kidding me? And that's where a 5 can really struggle in entrepreneurship. But when they use and utilize their wings and the anatomy of their Enneagram type, when a 5 can lean into that healthy 8 challenger, make things happen kind of type the capacity of their wisdom and the effectiveness of their action and leaning into that heart wing of theirs, that is when the magic of the five can happen. I want to hear those of you that are a five, or if you love or lead a five, how this has impacted you, please share it with somebody you know, that's an enneagram5. And again, if you are struggling to connect to your type or you're not sure if you've been mistyped or you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, reach out. Go to traceyomally.com book a typing kickstart session with me. This is like the beautiful beginning of your journey with really integrating the Enneagram in all things personal and professional and helping you become the ultimate leader in your life. I look forward to next week when I bring you all the things enneagram6 and until next time.

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If you have any follow up questions to this episode, you can DM me directly on Instagram at tracyomalley. You can also find additional resources on my website@tracyomalley.com I'm excited to lead you into the next level of your life.