EP190: The Anatomy of Your Enneagram Type: The Enneagram SEVEN—Finding the Flow in the Free Spirit of the Enthusiastic Visionary

Welcome to the Leadership Formula podcast, where you will learn the secret sauce behind achieving massive success. I'm your host, Tracy o', Malley, multimillion dollar entrepreneur, your Enneagram expert, master performance coach, and mom to millennials. Do you want deep, meaningful relationships? To wake up every day with purpose and make money doing something you love? Well, you've landed in the right place. Every week, I will teach you how to get exactly what you want in life by strengthening your emotional intelligence. Using a combination of the Enneagram framework, live life coaching sessions, and real talk from yours truly. It's time to transform yourself into the ultimate leader of your life.

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Hello. Hello and welcome to another episode of the Leadership Formula podcast. And we are continuing our series on the anatomy of your Enneagram type. And today's episode is all about the enneagram 7. We which is sometimes called the Enthusiast. I like to call it the enthusiastic visionary or the master innovator. And honestly, I gotta tell you, the enneagram7 is why I was so excited, nervous, intrigued by the Enneagram. Quite honestly, you know, once I discovered I was an Enneagram 8 and realized that both my children are not an Enneagram 8, and very quickly realizing that I'm raising an Enneagram 7 and an Enneagram 7 daughter.

I love the Sevens. And actually as an enneagram 8, it is one of my wings that I get to use. And you know, if you're new to the Enneagram, don't worry, I will get into what wings are here on this episode. Specifically, if you love or lead or are an enneagram7. But you know, raising a daughter is. Is one of the most beautiful things ever. And raising a daughter that could not be more different than you in so many ways was also very beautiful as. Because I knew she was going to be my greatest teacher and also the thing at times that would make me feel so inadequate. And when I learned about the Enneagram and started to apply the self awareness for myself, I was like, wow, this can maybe help me understand, not just understand my daughter in ways that were so loving, you know, and I've always adored and loved my daughter, but it's been very challenging for me. And raising a daughter brought up a lot of my old wounds that I thought I could outrun, outwit, outlast, you know, move away from like all the things, right? And so this, the framework of the Enneagram that I'm going to share with you today about the enneagram7 really allowed me not only to love my daughter the very best way I possibly could. It helped me to understand her in a way that would help me empower her. It would also allow me to slip out of that habit that sometimes, you know, as friends, parents, spouses, whatever, we try to interject and get people to believe and operate like we do. And I knew because my daughter was so different than me, that without another set of tools to help me bring out the best in her natural tendency would be to just, like, try to make her believe, do all the things that I did. And I knew I didn't want that for her. And I knew that she could teach me a whole heck of a lot. And so you all, here we are 10 years later, have my daughter, who is an enneagram7, the enthusiastic visionary, to thank. Thank for the role that I have in the world today, talking about the Enneagram and specifically the integration of it in your lives, in your businesses, in your homes, you know, because I believe that, you know, leadership just isn't out into the real world. It's. It's pretty much in everything we do. So the Enneagram Sevens have the motivational need to experience life to the fullest and avoid pain. Okay. They sometimes get a bad rap of being all over the place or flaky. And before I get into this, I know that some of you listening, think you may or may not know your Enneagram type, or if this is something you want to explore. Getting the right information is key. Okay? And all the online assessments are a great starting point. However, they are inadequate 65 to 70% of the time. So I really, really, really always kind of.

Start the episodes with that. Because if you're going to use this beautiful, incredible tool of the Enneagram, having the right information will be key. Okay? So I do live typing sessions. I do them in groups. I do them individually. They're so powerful, so beautiful, knowing that whatever you decide to walk away with, at least know that you'll have the right Enneagram type. And then you can use this framework in this system in your life with those you love, lead, and most importantly, yourself. Okay, so we're back to the Enneagram Sevens. They value a sense of freedom and focus on optimism, being inspired, and taking opportunities as they present themselves. Like, the worst case scenario for an enneagram 7 is to be left without options. They want all the things all the time, right? And this is where they can kind of get that bad rap of being all over the place. They really, really have this hyperactive optimist, anything's possible. There's no stupid ideas kind of brain. And for somebody like me who grew up and as an enneagram 8, you know, I'm very cautious. I'm always kind of scanning for betrayal or violation. Having Sevens in my life with like rose colored glasses in all the beautiful ways, really open up not just my life, but the entire world. They're the master innovators. I joke all the time that the pool noodle must, must have been invented by an enneagram7, because there is no opportunity, no job, no nothing that's off the table for an enneagram 7. They approach life and everything that they see in life as an adventure. And they appreciate being playful and spontaneous. At their best, others will experience an enneagram7 as content and serene when they are able to embrace sobriety and become present to themselves and the world around them. Now, when I mean sobriety, it's like whatever's in front of them is enough. Because when a 7 is kind of not in the best place or overwhelmed, this sobriety kind of takes a backseat. Meaning they believe that more is better, right? More things, more people. More, more, more, more, more. And this allows them to disassociate from their feelings. And so what I mean by embracing sobriety is that what's. Whatever is in them or around them for the moment, for right now, is more than enough, right? So it's really, really cool watching a Seven step into this healthy version of themselves, where, yes, their brain is always kind of like, what. What else is possible in all the right beautiful ways. But they're also able to be present in the moment with those that they love, those that they lead, and even themselves in the quiet. When Sevens are less healthy, we can experience the Enneagram 7 as very impulsive, uncommitted and unfocused, as they are distracted by their insatiable search for fulfillment and fear of missing out. Like I said, like, if you take away the options for a 7, or at all, they feel like they're going to be trapped or caged without an option. This is when you start to see the darker side of an enneagram 7 come into play. It's when they start to get very rigid, a little nasty sometimes. But understanding this, and for those of you that love or lead an enneagram7, sometimes they'll fire hose you with all the ideas. And for somebody like me, who automatically is a strategy, kind of like, how is this possible? You know, if I'm scanning for all like problems and betrayal. You know, when I'm getting fire hosed by a seven with all the things, I can kind of squash their dreams, you know, before I knew this information. So if you are loving or leading an Enneagram 7, or you are an Enneagram 7, knowing that, like, listen, I'm about to brain dump all of the things that are going on in my head, do I believe that all of them are going to happen? No. But if I don't get these out of my brain, then I can become overwhelmed and start, like, feeling like a squirrel, like, looking here, looking there, looking all the places everywhere. So when you are listening to a 7, just know that they need to be able to brain dump and uninterrupted. Because Nothing makes an enneagram 7 feel more caged than going, yeah, but what about this? Or interrupting them. This was probably the greatest gift that the Enneagram gave me in dealing with my own Enneagram 7. So if you are an Enneagram 7, you know, doing all the things is great and being an adventurous, spontaneous person is awesome. Your ideas, off the charts. Now, just living in that zone all the time isn't always the right tool for the job. And so I've talked to you guys before, if you've listened to other episodes, that the wings on the Enneagram are actually the true superheroes. And for the Enneagram 7, this is no different. So the wings fall on either side of your number in the framework of the Enneagram. And if you aren't familiar with what that looks like, just gts that right now, Google that shit and look at the diagram and you can see how they're numbered. And so as a seven, you have the options. Four wings of a six and an eight. Although that visionary, innovative, adventurous spirit is your superpower, you know you're going to need these other tools, the six and the eight tools, to really help you bring all those beautiful, innovative, visionary ideas to fruition. And when I talk about your growth number, there's no way a 7 goes to their growth number without the help of the wings. So the six wing is your loyal skeptic. That was last week's episode. And they are the master troubleshooters. They are the best collaborators. They kind of look at worst case scenarios. So you can see where as a visionary, as an innovator of anything's possible. Although that's exciting, you do have to do some troubleshooting. This will save you time, money, resources, relationships. So before a 7 just kind of says, let's Freaking go. So I really encourage the Sevens to kind of check in with their six wing and using all the beautiful gifts of that six, like, okay, what could go wrong? If I take action right now, who will this affect? If I take action right now, what will this cost me if things go sideways? You know, things like that? And that is how a 7 can use the 6 wing. Now, sometimes if the 7 is overwhelmed and they stay too long in that 6 wing, they can kind of feel so overwhelmed that they'll move actually into their stress number. So how to balance that, the six wing, really, really well, I like to say, is, all right, check in with your other, you know, sidekick, your. Your other supporting role here, and that's the Enneagram 8. Because the Enneagram 8, as you heard me talk about, kind of scans for violations, betrayal, and vulnerable situations. So the seven has the idea, the innovation, the vision. Anything's possible. Let's make it fun. Blah, blah, blah. All of it, right? Beautiful, beautiful qualities that we all need Sevens in our lives for. Then they do the troubleshooting with the Enneagra 6. Now, the last chain of defense for the Enneagram 7 is to check in with that 8. Okay, do we see any kind of chances for vulnerabilities, betrayal, violation, what challenges might arrive? You know, the 8 is called the challenger for a reason. And if the eight kind of says let's freaking go, then we go. And if anything should go wrong, guess what? I got this. And that's. That's the beauty of this for me and my daughter is me being an eight. You know, I have a seven wing accessible to me, and she's a seven. So she is that eight wing. And so now that we know how to communicate with each other, the elegance in which the two of us really bounce ideas, perspectives off each other is magical. It is truly, truly magical. And they make a great team. Now, the growth number for the Enneagram 7, which means, like, I want every Enneagram 7 out there to look at the Enneagram 5, which is the investigator, the most introverted on the Enneagram, ironically. So you can see as a seven, kind of left to your own ways, you will never go into that introverted investigator. But I want you to know that when you do take on the healthy parts of this enneagram5, this is where all these amazing, innovative ideas can actually be birthed. You have to give your energy and your heart and your brain and your body and your time a container for these beautiful ideas to come to fruition. And it's only in solitude that you can really, really hone in on that. But again, because that 7 is, you know, fearful of being trapped or caged or feeling pain or, you know, feeling like stuck without any kind of juicy parts of life, they won't go there by themselves. And so really with those six and eight wings saying to the seven, hey, we're going to go take a little bit of solitude right now. This does not mean we're going to be trapped or caged. Right? We're just going to really kind of hone in on the vision of these ideas. Okay? So in order for a 7 to step into growth, it absolutely will need the 6 and 8 wings to get you there. Now the stress number for the Enneagram 7. So when an Enneagram 7 is less healthy, this is where the flakiness, the looking like they're all over the place, the bouncing from thing to thing. Sevens actually are kind of prone to addiction as well. All the types are. But specifically since their biggest fear is feeling pain or being trapped, you can see where, you know, numbing out or disassociating through people, places or things really, they're both very prone to, if they're not careful and let's say, you know, they're under some stress and bouncing from thing to thing doesn't feel like it's going to do the trick for them. They start to take on the unhealthy parts of the Enneagram one, which ironically is like the reformer, the perfectionist. So imagine a free spirited, anything's possible kind of person all of a sudden looking like the most rigid, critical, negative kind of person and they can turn on a dime. And this was the crisis moment for me and my daughter because when she would slip into that the Enneagram ate me, wanted to fight, and she's already like having to have the last word in that reform or perfectionist ways. And it was really when it got ugly. So now knowing that like these unhealthier traits of the Enneagram one are the critical, the rigid, close minded, you can see how that is quite the opposite for an enneagram7. But now knowing this information and understanding the framework of the Enneagram 7 and the Anatomy of the Enneagram 7. So for those of you that are or you love or lead one, this is really, really important to notice. Like these are like warning lights. And when the all over the placeness isn't working anymore, this is when they slip into high stress. And so now today, when I see my daughter kind of slip into this instead of being reactive to it or taking it personal or getting defensive, or quite honestly, putting on the boxing gloves and wanting to fight. Instead of doing that, I can kind of just pause for myself and ask the enneagram7 in my life, how are you overwhelmed right now? What's on your plate that is spinning you out? And not a condescending way, but because I actually give a shit, right? And you know, if you're dealing with an enneagram 7, even though they might be a little bit resistant at first to kind of get into the feels, if they know you're a safe place and you actually care and you are there to help them with it, they can still be really rigid sometimes, but just the pause alone will help them get out of that much, much faster. Now, the gifts of the Enneagram 7 are as follows. And if you've heard me talk about the gifts and superpowers of each Enneagra type, you have also heard that the same things that are your superpowers can actually also be your Kryptonite, the wrecking ball in your life. So you know it. They become our superpowers and our gifts. When it's coming from love, compassion, empathy, service and grace, right? The come from. Now, these same gifts I'm going to tell you about, the Enneagram 7 absolutely can take a 7 down when it's coming from fear, insecurity, unworthiness, shame, guilt or ego. Okay, so their optimism. They focus on what brings joy, happiness and pleasure. This enables them to exude optimism, right? Like finding the juicy parts of life. Now this optimism, if they're in fear, can have them not taking things so seriously or sweeping things under the rug. So you can see the the polarity in the come from on how these are gifts or the Kryptonite. The Sevens are flexible. They are attuned to possibilities and like to keep options open. They're adaptable in the face of change, setbacks and challenges. They're master pivoters. This is their gift and also their downfall. Right? They're very future oriented. They focus on what's. What's next. So the seven's enthusiastic and visionary qualities enable you to both anticipate and create and exciting future. You also know if you're too future oriented, you don't really get to enjoy much in the moment. You miss the miracles right in front of you. So really making sure, you know, you run it through the filter. Where's my come from? Is it fear, insecurity, unworthiness, shame, ego, guilt, or is it love, compassion, empathy, service and grace? Right? Sevens are also very practical. At their best, a 7 can combine their ideas with a practical and productive focus that enables them to make things happen. And this is actually where their wings come into play for that. And they're adventurous. They make everything exciting and fun and the innocence of newness. This is why they bring so much joy to my life. But as a playful, versatile, and spontaneous person, the Enneagram 7 savors their freedom and like to explore new territories and experiences. And for somebody like me that, you know, is always scanning for violation, betrayal, vulnerabilities, there were many, many years in my life that I wasn't as adventurous as I would have liked to be. So having Sevens all around me and as one of my favorite kind of people, this helps me tap into the innocence of my eightness. Okay, so there's some blind spots. The 7 is very quick to learn new information and skills. They may, however, overestimate the extent in which they have truly mastered and absorbed this knowledge. A lot of times you'll know when they're excited about something because they can become an instant expert without having the depth of knowledge. And sometimes they can get found out. And they come by innocently because they're genuinely, genuinely excited. So this is why they need that growth number of that five, that solitude to kind of really gather themselves before they start spurting off at the mouth and getting themselves in kind of a pickle. Sevens need to be active. Engaged in their highly active body language, communication, style and thought may be stimulating to them, but sometimes they can be distracting and frustrating to others. Right? Especially their stress number. Enneagram ones can be very frustrated with a 7 if their style results in fidgeting or pacing. People may not properly pay attention to their ideas or take them seriously. And an enneagram7 may not be aware of the extent to which this impacts others and the processes of a group. Their active and quick mind may lead Sevens to assume that they know what other people are going to say. And as a result, they may not listen fully to what people are really saying. An enneagram7 may want to feel totally accepting of themselves, but constantly avoid the things that will enable them to feel this way. In rationalizing their mistakes, moving towards positive emotions and seeking excitement, Sevens sometimes can keep themselves from experiencing themselves as a whole. The last blind spot that I want to tell you guys about is. Sevens may mask fear and unwillingness by expressing and tuning into boredom. When they feel terrified about something, they may end up tuning into the ways in which this opportunity will limit them to avoid facing their fears. Now, one of the things that I talk about all the time is being mistyped. And 65 to 70% of you are mistyped if you used an online assessment. And, and the number one reason other than trauma, I believe is the subtypes, which is this instinctual drive that all of us have. And there's three of them. One is definitely dominant, but this is what can alter the appearance of a 7 or any of the other types. Okay, this is probably why many of you are mistyped, because if you think about how you instinctually respond to life, the motive and behavior can change how that gets expressed. It doesn't change the core motive or the core fear, but how it gets expressed can. And all those online assessments really don't take that into consideration. So the three instinctual responses to life for all the Enneagram types are self preservation, one on one, or social. The self preservation has this instinct to kind of focus on physical safety, well being and material security or comfort. The one on one has a drive to protect yourself in the environment, form alliances and extend yourself through generations, leaving a legacy. The one on one focuses on the intensity of experience and relationships that are more one on one. And then the social has the instinct to get along with others and form secure social bonds. So this brings focus on interactions and relationships with communities and a high social awareness. So out of the three instinctual responses to life, one of these does not typically look like the others. And this is where a lot of the mistyping can happen. Any of the subtypes can alter this, but there's one in each category that kind of looks a little bit different than your typical. Okay, so The Self Preservation 7 is a great networker. They gather a family of closer porters and are motivated by wanting the best for everyone. They love the good things in life and may risk becoming self interested in pleasure seeking. This subtype is generally good at getting what they need to have fun and feel safe. But they're may also be good at rationalizing and defending whatever they want to do. The one on 1 7. This is the dreamer, the idealist, the romantic. This is probably what a lot of the stereotypes fit into into. Okay. The one on one seven sees reality through the rose color filter, connected to the possibility and everything. Their enthusiasm and optimism may seem unrealistic or naive as they tend to believe in the good in everything and everyone. They want the world to be more than drear and dull and may embellish reality and dislike relationships that have Become boring and predictable. Now, the Social 7 is the counter type. This is the one that doesn't look typical to the memes, the stereotypes, or what most of you might think of as the seven. So the Social seven, actually against the gluttony that characterizes the seven, they tend to mistype with an Enneagram too, a lot of the time. They are generous and have a strong desire to be of service, to create a better, better world. They will sacrifice their own needs to serve the needs of a group or person they support. They can be judgmental regarding selfishness in themselves or others, and they hope to be appreciated for their sacrifice. So you can see where that one looks a little bit different than the others.

Learning about each of the Enneagram types will really allow you whether you are learning more about yourself, which is is the first step in leadership, right? You must be able to lead yourself before you can really effectively lead other people. But really learning about the other types on the Enneagram that are different than you, and especially the ones that are very different from you, will allow you not only to learn a lot more, but have a more open mind, become more well rounded, have more compassion and empathy for humans in general, to not take crap so damn personal, quite honestly. And again, if this is something you want to explore, I love spending my days working one on one with people, getting them typed properly or taking them through the Enneagram experience, which really dives deep into the anatomy of your Enneagram type and even those that you love and lead. And it's. It's powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful. And you can go to Tracey O' Malley.com the work with me section to book either a typing session or go for the whole experience. Y', all. If you know you want to dive deep into this, just book the whole experience and I will take you on that journey. I will be starting group typing workshops here in the very, very near, future. You can actually bring, you know, a group of people together where, whether it's a girl's night, a couple's night, whatever. And also I'll be doing group gatherings in general. Like if you're just a single or, you know, maybe one or two of you, but you don't have enough for a whole group, I will be bringing those to you soon. So I would love to hear what you are thinking about those ideas or what this episode has brought to your life. Please share it with somebody that you love or lead. And if you are loving what I am bringing to you in regards to leadership, the Enneagram or anything else. It would mean the world to me if you left a review on itunes and all the other places. This is how I get the episodes and this information and integration process to more people just like you. It is always my goal to help you become the ultimate leader in your life. And until next time.

I'm so happy you enjoyed the Leadership Formula podcast. Please help us spread the word about this show by sharing it with a friend and leaving a written Apple podcast review. You if you have any follow up questions to this episode, you can DM me directly on Instagram at traceyomalley. You can also find additional resources on my website@tracyomalley.com I'm excited to lead you.

Into the next level of your life.