EP216: The Enneagram Is More Than a Trendy Personality Test—How to Harness Its Power in Your Life

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Welcome to the Leadership Formula Podcast, where you will learn the secret sauce behind achieving massive success. I'm your host, Tracy o', Malley, multimillion dollar entrepreneur, your Enneagram expert, master performance coach, and mom to millennials. Do you want deep, meaningful relationships? To wake up every day with purpose and make money doing something you love? Well, you've landed in the right place. Every week, I will teach you how to get exactly what you want in life by strengthening your emotional intelligence. Using a combination of the Enneagram framework, live life coaching sessions, and real talk from yours truly. It's time to transform yourself into the ultimate leader of your life.

Let's do this thing.

You know how many times I get.

A message in my inbox or somebody shares a post with me about some cool Enneagram thing? Today, it was about paint colors based on your Enneagram type. And don't get me wrong, I'm all for the fun. Like, what would you order at a coffee shop based on your Enneagram type? And all of that and the paint colors and, you know, pop culture and Enneagram. I love all of it, right? But if we just leave it there as some fun, trendy party game or cool thing, you're missing the boat on the power and beauty of the Enneagram in your life. Welcome back to the Leadership Formula Podcast. This is your host, Tracy o', Malley. And I am excited to, you know, tell you the Enneagram is way more than a cool, fun, trendy party trick. You know, I was introduced to it 10 years ago in rehab by my therapist. So clearly I was not in the best part of my life. Things weren't working so great for me. And I say that because had the Enneagram been introduced to me, maybe even two years before it, I definitely would have fallen into the category of this is a cool, fun, trendy party game. I like the memes and all of that. So if that is you, trust me, I'm not judging you. I get it. It's fun. It's silly. It's just like astrology and all the things. Anytime we can poke fun at ourselves or poke fun with our friends and family members. It's fun, innocent fun. And I'm not saying we can't do that. But the Enneagram is a powerful, beautiful, self, personal business, emotional growth tool. It really allows you to connect with your inner child. It allows you to connect to your body and the somatic work that you need to do. It allows you to break generational patterns. It allows you to set and hold firm to boundaries. It allows you, most importantly, to have a hell of a lot more compassion for yourself. And when you can do that, you're able to do that with other people. Now we have things out there and you know, for those of you in business and corporations, I know, like Myers Briggs and the disc. Super popular, right? They were super, super popular for a long, long time and they still are in a lot of corporate spaces. What I'm loving though, is I'm doing a lot of work with corporations and with organizations and teams, entrepreneurs, businesses, families, because we're recognizing that although Myers Briggs and all of that are great, you know, any kind of self awareness on what we do and our behaviors and things, it's really, really important. But what those things lack is an understanding of why we do what we do. And the Enneagram does that. I like to explain the Enneagram as like nature and nurture collide into this perfect storm and opens up an awareness to not only what we do, but why we do it. And also touches on maybe some childhood patterns that we learned along the way that can change the expression of it. And it's this roadmap and this framework that especially if you were my age, I was 40 years old when I was introduced to this, and I'm about to turn 50. And you can imagine trying to unpack and reverse engineer how you've operated for 40 years and it's not working the way that you want it to. And to try and redirect how you live. That's such an overwhelming task if you don't have a roadmap or framework for it. And the Enneagram provided that. So not only could I look at myself very clearly, I could have compassion, but I could accelerate transformation. Right? It really, really is that powerful. Now the other thing a lot of you focus on around the Enneagram type, once you think you have your type, which a whole nother thing is, you just focus on your type and you're missing the boat. When I do typing sessions with you or do any kind of coaching with you, I don't just focus on your core type because your core type doesn't change, but the expression of it can. And there are times that the expression of your core type is very dysfunctional, like mine was for a long, long time. There are times that you'll lean into a wing, one of the wings, which are extra tools in the tool belt. And sometimes your wings are your dysfunction too. It's a lot of some of the bad habits and coping mechanisms come in Right. And not always in the healthy way. So knowing how to utilize those wings, they're extra. But so many of you just think, hey, I don't have a wing. Or you don't even know what a wing is, or you don't even have any idea the power in these extra tools for you. And knowing how and when to flex those is really, really important. But the real thing that I see is like growth. And I know if you're listening to this podcast, you have raised your hand and said, I am committed to my own personal growth. I' done personal development. I listen to podcasts, I read the books, I hire the coaches, I do the courses. And you know what? The shit's still not working. It's because you don't know how to maybe execute some of this information. You don't maybe have a self awareness that all this regurgitated shit that's out there, that seems to be a one size fits all, isn't based on your Enneagram type. So there's a way that you can take all this one size fits all information that's out there, put it into your Enneagram type, and then execute it based on the way that works best for you and pushes you into your growth. But for so many of you, you took an online test that took two minutes and I get it, it's fun. And if you didn't know, you didn't know. And that's why I am like speaking loud and proud about the Enneagram and how important it is. If you want to use it for the tool that it is, it's a life changing tool. And if you want to use it first for yourself and then within your families and businesses and organizations and teams, you got to have the right information. They're one of two ways to do that. You can kind of go at it solo. Take one of the paid Enneagram tests that are online. Those are still inaccurate 65 to 70% of the time. But the paid ones actually will give you a little more information that you can start to narrow it down. But if you have a hard time being radically honest with yourself and radically compassionate with yourself, it's going to be a challenge for you to nail it down. Because there are things that have happened early on in your life that have you operating in certain instincts that can mask what your true enneagram type is. And if you're okay with taking time in that self discovery process, then have at it. It's kind of like going to Disneyland without the fast pass and without a Guide and just kind of winging it. You'll still have a great time with it. You'll still have a great time at Disneyland, but you might miss some of the miracles along the way. And so sometimes taking this Enneagram path on own, you'll have a great time with it. You'll enjoy it, you'll enjoy the process, but you might miss the very thing that makes your life the most magical. It was meant to be. All right, the other option is to do a typing session with me. And you can look at that on my website@tracyomalley.com, the work with me section. It's the most game changing 90 minutes of your life. I will have you take an assessment that I am using, and those are still inaccurate, but I know how to break them down and how to read them in a way that we get it right. That's like having the fast pass at Disneyland, where. And a VIP tour. If you've ever done that, like I did that at Universal, let me tell you, that is the way to do it. I never have to go back to Universal Studio again. Unless, of course, I want to see Harry Potter World, which I might, but even then I would take a VIP pass for that. Like, if you know you want to accelerate your transformation, accelerate your growth, you want to use this tool that is not complicated. It is complex, but it is not complicated. Book a typing session with me. You can do that@traceeomalley.com work with me. It's a kickstart session. I have heard probably more than 25 times after the 90 minutes are up. You know, Trace, I have done years and years and years of therapy, and I got more out of that 90 minutes than I have in all of it. And I love therapy. And I still see my therapist that introduced me to the Enneagram. But therapy can be slow. And it doesn't always open your eyes up to why you do what you do. It kind of just goes through the past and looks at the patterns, and that's really, really important. But the gift of the Enneagram is the acceleration of your transformation, especially when you have the right information, you have the right guide, you know what direction you want to go in. Then it's like, three, two, one, blast off. Doing typing sessions is hands down one of my most favorite things to do. It really, really is. And I'm working on something for you guys currently so that if you can't do an Enneagram typing session with me, or if my schedule's too packed or it's out of your budget or whatever that looks like for you. I am putting together something for you that you'll be able to do that and you'll get direction and guidance from me like that. I would love to know if that's something you want. I'm excited about doing that for thousands of you because I do want to help more of you and I understand that there's so many hours in a day and I can't sit down with each and every one of you. If that's something you are interested in, shoot me a message, because I know that that needs to happen. It's the gap in this Enneagram. It's the missing piece for the Enneagram is making sure we get the right information so that you can use the map and the framework for your soul that will allow you to have the growth that you have been dying to have. You know, this last decade has been where personal development has really gotten the main stage. And I'm, you know, being 50 years old almost here. I'm a first generation personal developer. I really, really am. I didn't have that modeled for me. In fact, I came from the generation that, like, what happens in our house stays in our house, and, you know, do as I say, not as I do. And this is how we've always done it. And too fucking bad. And like, that's the generation I grew up with. And they. They're just repeating what they did and, you know, more power to them. And I love that. Like, I get it, I get it. But when we weren't taught, told, and modeled how to grow personally, emotionally, spiritually, it can be a challenge. And when we have decades of that or trauma or whatever else you've got going on in your life. I know unpacking a lot of this or, you know, you've got so much information, but it's like you're throwing up shit up. You're throwing a bunch of shit up at the wall, hoping something sticks and nothing is. And then you start pulling out the shame stick on yourself because, you know, you've invested a lot of time, maybe thousands and thousands of dollars on programs, courses, coaches, events, books, you name it. And I'm not knocking any of that. I love that you're committed. I love that you're raising your hand and saying, I want to change. The problem is so many of you are taking in so much information and quite honestly, a lot of wrong information that you have ended up feeling worse than better. And I would be so grateful and so thankful and so honored Quite honestly, to help you on a journey that at least can put you in the right direction so that when you start really doing some of this other stuff, it can actually stick. It can actually stick and you can feel the forward momentum that you're desiring. Now, does this mean I'm ever going to stop poking fun at the Enneagram types and doing some memes from here and there? No, because I think that, you know, finding the light hearted, free spirited, fun part of this is really, really important too. But I will always take it back to this is a very beautiful tool. This is the biggest tool that I have used to change my life and it goes along with my faith. You know, for those of you that think like, this is not something that, you know, if you're faith filled, that this is something for you, actually it's quite opposite how I've explained the Enneagram to a lot of people. And this is the God's honest truth. And you know, there's a lot to be said out on the Internet around the Enneagram. But whatever, this is how I describe it and this is the impact it's had on my life and the thousands and thousands of people that I have introduced to it and helped them integrate it in their life. Because I believe we are all born with a divine calling. We're a miracle just because we're born, quite honestly. And I do believe that God, a divine source, whatever you choose to call it, to me it's God has a calling on our life, has a plan. You know, the steps are already ordered and a temperament and disposition that is very unique to us, right? This is like nature and nurture colliding. And then we're dropped into homes and environments and schools and families. And how that temperament and disposition that we are divinely given gets expressed can change based on those environmental things. So nature and nurture collide, right? And depending on the collision and perfect storm that happens, we learn some coping mechanisms along the way. Sometimes they're great, sometimes not so great for us. Sometimes they hold us back, sometimes they help us move forward. But usually there's this, you know, roller coaster ride that we take in our coping that is blocking us from the very, very things we want. So when we have our proper Enneagram type, we know the roadmap. We can see where some of this stuff comes up. And really getting to the root of it will allow you to have compassion for yourself. And when we can have compassion for ourselves, we ooze that for other people. We're able to Lay down boundaries. We're able to say no when we mean no. We're able to say yes when it's a fuck yes. We're able to take scary action and be vulner and ask for what we need and do self honoring practices and honor the vessel in this body that we were given. This is the beauty of the Enneagram. It is the number one fastest execution of transformation I have ever had in my life. And I have been at this since I was 28 years old. So you can do the math. That was 22 years ago. I have been hardcore raising my hand, saying I'm all into personal development now because I didn't really understand why I was the way I was all the time. I mean, I knew I had it in me, but I couldn't really pinpoint a lot of it. There were a lot of times that I'd take some steps forward and a hell of a lot back and then I'd feel frustrated and beat myself up and then the cycle would continue. I know a lot of you are tired of the cycle of a few steps forward, a bunch back. Shame, spiral, anger, resentment, anxiety, fear, shame, right? Sound familiar? If you are tired of any of that in your life, book a typing session with me. Let's uncover who your soul was always designed to be and get on the roadmap so that you can live out your soul's calling, your soul's purpose for you, for your families, for the greatest good, and for the impact that I know without question you are here to execute in your life. And I would be honored to take you on that journey. If you have questions about that, you can find me on Instagram. Traceyomalley on Instagram. I'm also on Facebook, LinkedIn, all of those things. But if you know that you want to dive in a little deeper, even if you think you know your Enneagram type, I would highly encourage you to do a typing session with me because 65 to 70% of you are mistyped. Be on the lookout for a way to do typing with me that isn't as invasive as 90 minutes or as much of an investment. I'm working on that very quickly. But you can go to tracyomalley.com the work with me section, click on the little kickstart session, and we will dive in. It will be a powerful 90 minutes and probably never have felt so seen, heard, understood or valued in your life from somebody who had never met you before. And even if I have met you before, let me help you show the way of your soul so that you can do everything that you are called to do here in this world and everything that you desire and deserve. It is my goal to help each and every one of you become the ultimate leader in your lives, in your homes, in your friendships. I want you to have the friendships that support and empower you. I want you to have the sexy, romantic, powerful kind of love and partnership with an intimate partner. I want you to have a legacy and parent the way that fills you up inside. I know if I died tomorrow, I am one hell of a parent. I am probably one of the greatest moms to my kids ever and I'm so proud of that. I could not have done that. Without the Enneagram, there's no way in hell. And I want that for all my moms and dads out there. And professionally, I know you have a calling and an impact to make here in the world. And maybe you're pivoting and maybe you're switching things up and that's okay too. Knowing your Enneagram can help you pivot faster and without feeling like you're doing something wrong or like you're flaky or you don't know what the hell you're doing. Let me help you streamline this so that you can step in to that ultimate leader in your life. You guys, it is such an honor and privilege for me to be able to come to you and speak to you. I appreciate everything that you inbox me about and the shares that you do of the podcast. It means the world to me. If you have ideas and things you want to hear about on this podcast, please, please reach out and let me know what you want more of. I just want to bring you things that add value to your life. To your homes, to your businesses, to your soul. You guys, until next time, here is to becoming the ultimate leader in your life.

I'm so happy you enjoyed the Leadership Formula Podcast. Please help us spread the word about this show by sharing it with a friend and leaving a written Apple Podcast review. If you have any follow up questions to this episode, you can DM me directly on Instagram at tracyomalley. You can also find additional resources on my website@tracyomalley.com I'm excited to lead you into the next level of your life.

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