EP303: When You Have A Big Vision For Your Life Without Letting The Crazy Take Over With Astrologist Kasey Hernandez (Enneagram 7)

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Welcome to the Leadership Formula podcast, where you will learn the secret sauce behind achieving massive success. I'm your host, Tracy o', Malley, multimillion dollar entrepreneur, your Enneagram expert, master performance coach, and mom to millennials. Do you want deep, meaningful relationships? To wake up every day with purpose and make money doing something you love? Well, you've landed in the right place. Every week, I will teach you how to get exactly what you want in life by strengthening your emotional intelligence. Using a combination of the Enneagram framework, live life coaching sessions, and real talk from yours truly, it's time to transform yourself into the ultimate leader of your life. Let's do this thing.

Hey. Hey.

Welcome back to another episode. And I thought since today is a very special day, it's actually my daughter's birthday and I always save these last few episodes of the year to bring something very personal part of my life, the. The most important people to my life, to you. And I think every year that I've had this podcast. So for three years now, my daughter Casey has been a guest. I think this will be her third time. And I thought since she turns 26 today, and she has grown more this last year than I think I've ever seen her grow. And our relationship has grown very, very, very close. Even closer this last year. I thought we would have a great little chat that I know that many of you listening will benefit from.

So.

Hi, Case.

Happy birthday. Hello.

How does it feel to be 26? I'm not a fan. Definitely hitting me in weird ways. It's like the first birthday that's ever, like, I'm not looking forward to, if that makes sense.

How come?

I don't know. I'm closer to 30 than 20, so there's that. And I definitely struggle with. So like, what am I doing? Am I up to speed for my age? Am I like behind all that? You know, everything comes with being a 26 year old.

I guess you're at that fine line between, like, living your best fun, free, spirited life and also venturing into real hardcore adulting. What's your favorite part about adulting?

Currently favorite part about adulting. I mean, I love feeling like smart and educated and things that even like two years ago I would have been like deer in headlights on, you know, like simple things like credit and taxes and whatever, insurance. But like, I, I like feeling independent in those ways and starting to kind of figure out the ropes on that. But other than that, adulting pretty much sucks. Not a fan elsewhere.

And this is exactly why I wanted to bring Casey to all of you because she is an enneagram7. She's also my greatest teacher and biggest inspiration. And the whole reason why I dove into personal development over 20 years ago. And she brings this beautiful energy even to hard things like adulting. So what currently is your least favorite thing about adulting right now?

Oh, definitely finances and like getting your shit together in that category and like trying to figure out how to level yourself up from just being like, you know, I can take care of myself but. And like, I can live my present days fine and I can take care of myself, but finding the shift to go from that to like, okay, now I'm like setting up a future financially for myself. You know what I mean? Like, not just what can I. What can I accomplish this month, but more like looking few years ahead and trying to set yourself up bigger. And that's the hard part I'm really struggling with is like getting out of that little rut.

Well, I think that a lot of you listening fall into this category too, whether you're an enneagram7 or not. I think if 2020 taught us anything, it's to kind of think forward, right, and set ourselves up for whatever life we want to live. And for an enneagram 7 are that free spirit. It's like whatever's exciting right now. But the reality of in order to do what's exciting to me, I have to have some things in place in order to make that happen. And I wanted to talk to Casey today because I know in my thousands of coaching calls I've done over the years that a lot of times we can get overwhelmed by what it might take to live that life or, you know, you have some stinking thinking or some self sabotage that comes into play or the who the hell am I to dream this big kind of mentality. Out of all three of those things, what do you think is the thing that gets you stuck the most?

I think I have a lot of anxiety and just in general, so I get a little bit panicked when I start to think about the future and I'm not in the place where I can make that goal or dream happen at the moment. And then I start to kind of like get very, very frazzled. And it starts, it kind of takes over my mind. I become like an overthinker and I become very anxious, hyper, like sensitive and things like that. I definitely struggle in that category, but I've figured out a few ways to kind of like help my own self out. And definitely I'm not, not doing it Alone and having people around me that kind of can recenter me also, you know, really helps.

What are some of the things that you currently do? Because I know I can go into a certain place and you're right, like having the right support, guidance, all of that around you is really important. But you know, watching you your whole life, it's been really awesome to watch how you do navigate the panic and the scary parts, which is human, right? There's no way to really avoid that. So how do you keep yourself grounded without losing your shit?

I used to definitely like years ago, I would say like earlier 20s, my early young 20s, I can't anyway, I would say like, you know, 22, 23 year old me would be very much like panic and act right away like, okay, I'm panicking, so I'm just gonna do it, I'm just gonna send it. And it didn't really always work out for me in that way. It would work temporarily, but it never worked in my future. And now I've noticed if I get say there's a goal I want to hit or something I really want to accomplish that I'm not capable of doing at that exact moment. I've gotten really good at like structuring my goals in my br, like kind of creating it like a checklist instead of something that you have to get done today. I kind of prioritize myself from like what's most important and what needs to happen first in order to make that like I separate my goals and make them almost smaller to lead up to the big goal. And it's really helped me because if I, if I give myself like a smaller timeline, it kind of relieves that anxiety. Like if I'm like, okay, I can't do that right now, but maybe come April I'll be there. If I do this and then I do that and then I do that and then it's like, it kind of relieves a lot of the anxiety because you know that you're going to accomplish it come whatever time you give yourself, you know. And then also having. Before I had a good support system around me. I've always had good people. But right now I'm with a lot of people who have like minded goals. And that's also really helpful because it kind of keeps you accountable. Especially someone like me who I don't know, not, I'm not, not accountable, but just someone like me who, if so if there's nothing, something on the line, it doesn't make me as motivated. So if I'm working Alongside someone for a similar goal. It helps me kind of stay more on pace. Cause I don't want to let anyone down or myself down.

You know, I was thinking about what you said about like, kind of reverse engineering what needs to happen and the smaller goals, because I know those types that are overthinkers, let's say. Or if you are an enneagram7 or you have big dreams and you want to do all of it right now, I know that all that extra chaos in your head actually gets nothing done. And then putting some smaller goals into place at least creates some momentum and it doesn't feel as overwhelming. Is that accurate for you?

No, definitely. Like, for example, I'm. I'm trying to move out with my boyfriend. We're trying to get an apartment, and things right now are crazy in the economy and we are trying to budget correctly. And I'm looking at my situation in a full panic, you know, And I don't want to let him down. I don't want to let myself down. I'm also so super prideful. X, Y and Z. So instead of just panic buttoning it, blowing all my savings, and like doing something, because I just want to getting a case of the fuck yeah, I. I like. I'm like, okay, so this will be my December goal, which is either to save this amount or shift my life a certain way to create more like, revenue and situations or whatever the case may be. And instead of feeling like, okay, I need to make this happen right now, I can just make abundance happen right now, or work on the saving aspect of things or work on whatever versus like, trying to tackle it all in one day or one week.

So as an enneagram 7, you like to make sure everything is fun, adventurous, exciting, all of the things. And I know the excitement of really starting your life with your person, as exciting as that is, because I get to watch you guys all day long. How confining it can be when there's all these logistical things that are holding that up. So how do you. Because I know when you feel anxious, the Enneagram one can look like an. Or the Enneagram seven can look like an Enneagram one. How do you manage the crazy and keep yourself out of that rigidity or frustration?

I don't really. I'm not gonna lie. I. I'm definitely still working on that part of myself.

I can't.

I don't know. At this point, I still struggle with that a lot because I want, like, the pretty side of things. I don't always want the frustrating like part to get there. And then I do get very hyper stressed and fixated. A little ocd, a little bit type A. But honestly, it's fine. I'm okay with being that person as long as it doesn't take me down mentally, which it can. But I know that I like you, for example, mom. And then I have Jake and my boyfriend or whatever and people around me just to kind of be like, girly, let's just take a breath. Doesn't like kind of recentering me. Honestly, the only thing that gets me through those moments are my people. Because alone, I would definitely be a basket case in that category. I don't know, I probably need to figure that out. But one thing at a time.

You actually are doing really, really great. And I will tell you this, this is the benefit of getting older, is you have enough receipts to show that even when it gets a little crazy up in our head, if we at least take some forward movement, we get a little momentum, it builds up our confidence and we know that this too shall pass.

Yeah. And actually I will say this when. With what you said. I guess I do have a one coping skill to get me through those moments. And it's actually advice I just gave my brother not too long ago. And when I gave it to him, I started to use it on myself and it really, really helped. Yeah. But I kind of just said, think about everything you've been through since you turned 21. Right? Like anything that got you that in that position where you're feeling that exact feeling and you're getting that hyper anxiety, super stressed out, super overthinking, panic mode, all of that. Think about how long it took to actually get over that hump. It wasn't that long. It worked out. And then you move on. And then there's another thing that'll happen next year that'll make you feel that same way. And so then I think in those moments, just reminding myself that like. Like I don't have the answer for why it's gonna work out, but I know it will because it never hasn't, has always kind of reminded me like, okay, take a breath. Like, you're gonna be fine. Chill out. You know what I mean?

I do. But I will say it's really hard when you're in the thick of it to remember that or to not get overwhelmed or angry or frustrated or even sad about certain things.

Agreed. But. Agreed. But that's why I make the extra effort to put that thought in my brain. Because even if I don't Believe it in the moment. It does help me when I just keep reminding myself, like, it always works out. That's like just what I always repeat. Even if in the moment I'm not believing it, or in the moment I'm like, annoyed at myself for even saying it, or if someone else says it to me and I want to be like, fuck you, you don't get it. But it does resonate and it always does come back full circle in my brain.

I also find that the more that you have gotten better about articulating your anxiety before you're in a full blown anxious moment, those that love you can help you without dismissing how you feel. Because I know when. When somebody like you gets into a panic, it's intense and it's. It's usually when you and I would go brawl, right? Because like, you had been kind of pushing it down, pushing it down. But you've gotten so much better about communicating with your support system in a way. And we all know you and know, like, this is a lot for you. And even though we may not process it like you. What's your most frustrating part about when you're in that panic for yourself?

Frustrating for like just me, myself and I are frustrating with people around me? Well, I would say the thing that can trigger it worse is when people around me don't take it seriously or kind of like minimize my problem just because it sounds like a mini problem. I think I get triggered really easily when I'm not being taken seriously and when someone's like, doubting my thoughts or like trying to tell me something, it's not because I'm like, I know what I'm talking about. I know what I'm feeling like, you know what I mean? And then that can just spiral me even more because it makes me feel very alone, which is also a very scary feeling for me. So that would probably be a really hard one. And then with myself just, I don't know, I think like you had said, like the imposter syndrome or I'm pretty empathetic and I kind of get mad at myself when I get mad at stupid shit when I. Because I start to think about big, big things that humans every day go through that I haven't even experienced. And. And that part really gets me, like I kind of go into a little shame bubble after I get like a blow up like that.

So you're multi passionate and that is like the beauty of being an enneagram7. And also kind of your kryptonite is you want to do all the things. But if you can't do one thing, great, it kind of prevents you from doing all the things. And you know, as a 26 year old, it's amazing. Like you've been in your career for eight years already, which is like at 18 you knew exactly what you wanted to do. You went out to la, did all the things. You're a licensed esthetician, you're, you know, you do like 13, 14 different services in the beauty industry. Highly professional, highly sought after. And I know that there's like even more that you wanted to do. And so, you know, as a little girl, I remember you totally always being into astrology. Thank you, Aunt Tracy. And just being really connected to understanding at a level like that. And it's been cool because last year this time you were in the middle of being certified. How has your knowledge, wisdom, and not just integration, but also now teaching of astrology, how does that help you in your day to day life?

Oh, that's everything to me. That's like my church, you know what I mean? I know it sounds cheesy, but I think anyone on earth listening to this should know that no matter what route you take with spirituality or religion or faith or the human understanding, whatever it is that makes you feel peace, I think every single person needs something like that. For me, it's my spirituality. And astrology is a big factor in that because it helps me understand. I've really in depth taken insane trips down who I am because of astrology. Just because of a natal chart, just the way the sky was when you were born, like it's just crazy to me. And the accuracy of it is what blows my mind even more. And it helps me guide myself into calmer moods or calmer mindsets when I'm starting to get a little bit overwhelmed because I can give it a why or a reason or something that can just be like, gives me peace, you know what I mean? And helping other people be able to do that with themselves has also been really beneficial for me as well because it shows me how everyone is just so unique and we're all so different. And it gives me a little more compassion for people who don't operate the way I do and vice versa because we're all different, we're all just trying to survive out here.

I love that you say that because if you haven't listened yet to the episode that got dropped two days ago, I talk about, you know, specifically, I know if you maybe are somebody of faith and religious things like enneagram astrology, There's a little hesitancy on leaning into that. And I shared, you know, exactly what you just said about astrology. What the Enneagram gave me actually rooted me more in my faith and allowed me to understand myself at a godlike divine level, right? Like what I was always designed to be. And I think anytime that we have some kind of framework or a roadmap that helps keep us rooted in that, that's when our gifts can come to the surface.

That's exactly it. That's like exactly what I was thinking, like, almost. It's reassuring. Instead of like being insecure about a part of yourself or like trying to change a part of yourself or be this type of way, even though naturally you're trying, you're naturally a whole opposite, that it's like learning the depth of your enneagram or learning the depth of your astrology and your natal chart can really be very reassuring to you and may you feel happy with who you are instead of trying to be something else. And then you can really lean into those gifts that you're reading about or feeling and learn how to make them even more powerful and better. And that's what makes us also special.

Honestly, I gotta say, like, watching you this last year, like, you've grown so much, and I know it's not just because you're hitting 26 today. I know a lot of it not only comes from understanding your own natal chart and the framework of everything about who you are on an astrological level, but watching you do this for other people. There's something about using your divine gift and your wisdom in astrology and helping other people find their way. What has been some of the most. It's, it's so cool to watch you. And I mean, you've helped me. There were moments this year I was like, case, let's pull up my chart. Like, I know my Enneagram and I know all of that, but I need a little more divine help. What. What has been your favorite part about helping other people with it? And where has that made a huge impact for you in, in your life?

I mean, there's so many ways that it makes me feel like positive ways when it comes to like, clients and, and stuff and like people who I've never even met before, reaching out and like, we'll hop on Zoom and do a little hour long session. Like when it comes to that stuff, that's very impactful for me because one, it's reassuring to me that I'm on my right path because I sometimes go into Him a little hesitant, like, oh, I'm gonna drop a bomb on this stranger, you know? And then when it's received well, then it's like, okay, like, you know, we're good. That's really fun for me. But then also, like, seeing. Getting responses months down the line from those strangers who are now friends or, you know, mutuals in some way. Getting, like, a text from them a month later, like, oh, my gosh, this just happened to me. And it just brought me right back to what you were saying in my reading. And I used what you said and the advice you gave me for a moment, like that, and it totally went, like, a positive direction. Like, when that happens after a natal chart reading with someone who I'd never even met before it, that's like, what gives me so much happiness in my soul. Because it just makes me feel like I'm making people live an easier life. Even though shit's still gonna happen. It helps them navigate through it a little easier. Yeah. And the free will. And that's the best part. I feel like people think, oh, I'm. My chart says I'm this, or the sky today said this, so this is gonna happen. Like, it's not. It's not so black and white, which is also what I love. Astrology in general, it's just a guide. It's not to be a rule book or a law book or tell you what to do or predict your future. That's not what it's here to do. And I think that's the misconception with it that I'm really trying to break, because it's really just there to help you. It's like a tool in your toolbox. That's it. And you can choose to use it, or you can choose not to, but it's always there, and it's always existing, whether you like it or not. You can't believe in it. It just is, you know?

She's also you guys a manifesting generator, like me. So we're both manifesting generators. We're both the assertive types on the Enneagram. And we have a very powerful big three in astrology. So what are your big three, and why do people need to understand their big three? And what do each of the big three mean?

So my big three, so I'm a Capricorn sun with a Gemini moon and a Scorpio rising. So pretty intense. Well, it's. It's a lot to explain, but in a basic version of it, like your son is, basically. I like to think of it As a tree. That's. This is like my little analogy I give to all my beginners. I like to look at it at your big three as like a tree, right? So if you think about a pine tree in the forest, if you were to like, chop it in half at just the. The root of the tree and it kept growing, it would still be a pine tree. Like, that would be your sun sign. You know, if you cut the Capricorn tree in half to the nub and it kept growing, it would still be growing as a capricorn. That's how I like to put the sun into perspective. It's just who you are. It's everything about you. And then I like to think of, like, your rising sign as the branches of the tree. The big outer shell of your tree is your protection shield. It's like your crutches for when you're feeling self conscious or a little bit insecure or vulnerable. It's like a very good protection shield. It's a personality trait that is very TR you that just comes out when you're not fully ready to give your full vulnerable self. But it kind of helps. It helps your sun sign. Like, it helps you kind of step into your sun sign.

You're like the wings of the Enneagram.

Exactly like, exactly like that. I feel like as humans, we're operating so much of the time in our rising sign because there's so many times you're not comfortable completely. And. And that's basically what your rising is there for. It's there to kind of give your sun sign a little bit of a booster. And then our moon sign, I like to think of that as, like, all the secrets inside of the tree that you can't really see on the outside. So, like, oh, there's a random football that got lost in that tree and a bird's nest and spiderwebs or whatever the case may be. And it's like, that is what I would call the moon sign. It's our vulnerabilities and emotions and our emotional side of things, how we process any of our feelings. Happy, sad, angry, jealous, mad, whatever. That's how I would describe the moon sign. So whatever your moon sign is, anytime you're in a hyper emotional state, that's usually what's coming out.

So it's funny because my rising sign is Casey's sun sign. So I can look very Capricorn for sure. That's probably what most people would see. So who can benefit if somebody knows astrology, but they know a little bit. They think they know who would benefit from learning about the big three and how can it help them?

I mean everyone, I think everyone can benefit obviously. But I think like just a simple knowledge of just your big three in general is obviously the best place to start. It's just like learning your Enneagram type in your wing, you know, before you learn your subtype and where you go in stress and all of that. You just need to know the general basics of type 7 or type 8. You know, that's kind of how I feel about the big three. Like anyone that wants to just figure out who they are on a very basic level, a very simple broken down level, that's exactly where you would want to start.

Now I know we have a lot of people that listen that, you know, they're familiar with Enneagram, obviously it's why they're here. Human design is really making, you know, a big emergence here in the personal development world for the person that is an entrepreneur or a mom or a business owner or just as interested in in them. What can going deeper in astrology do for them personally and professionally? Not just the big three.

Oh, so much. I mean, for me, I'll give an example just with myself. I love astrology, always have. Was raised on it. I knew my zodiac sign before I even knew what Christianity was. I swear, it's just been a part of me since I could remember. And I always looked at it as just something fun and I never looked at it as something so intense or such a guide. And it wasn't until I even took the astrology course with Natalia Benson. And that's how I became a certified astrologist. But through taking that course, that's when I started to realize I could actually use it as a tool in business. Because not only creating an astrology business, but also I work at a beauty studio with amazing women and we're all so different. And it helps helped me kind of know how to navigate, you know, business situations and business conversations. And even with my clients, you know, like when they come to me with needing to vent about a problem or anything like that, I my first, I mean I always ask their birthday. Like I know every single one of my clients sun signs at least. And like being able to help them on navigate feelings and struggles through a way that I know is going to help that specific sign is so great because I'm never going to tell a Pisces to navigate a problem the way I would. We're completely different and I would kind of shift my verbiage and it really helps. I feel like since I've become certified in astrology, I've actually impacted people around me in my business. So much more positive and actually giving them real stuff to work with.

The other thing I've witnessed you understanding and integrating that in your life and the people that you help, including me and your brother. Like seriously, like we all use enneagram, we all use astrology, we all are faith driven people that you have really helped us. And like you said, I notice you actually have more energy the more that you lean into your gifts. And I know there's a lot of people listening right now. You know, we're less than a week away now from 2023 starting and people really need some guidance and direction and a fresh start. And I, you guys, I'm not just saying this because she's my daughter and she knows this like I'm straight shooter no matter what. I cannot express enough how much her gift has helped me in astrology. Other than being my greatest teacher. She, she is my. Her and Natalia both are my go to's when it comes to understanding all of this. Where can people find you and maybe book a session with you and what kind of offerings do you have currently when it comes to astrology?

Well, I'm currently working on a website so for now you could just find me on Instagram. It's Kasey Nicole with three E's at the end. K A S E Y N I, C O L E E E. Just like you know, shoot me a little message if you're interested. I'm always, I love having like an open DM policy. I'm never one to good or too much for anyone. I just love connecting with people. I love building friendships and relationships all around me and helping people however I can.

And what are the kind of readings that you can do for someone?

So right now I really just have two readings that I really focus on. Obviously the big three one we just went over and that's a little quick half hour session that I kind of do quite often. But then another one I really love doing and I feel like the one that most people get the most out of is my hour long. I call it the soul map reading.

It's just taking your natal chart in a bigger way and breaking it down for your specifics. So whether it's finances, relationships, life purpose, parents and parenting advice, even though I'm not one, it's crazy how much I can see in someone's chart just with that alone. And really any category you can think of that you're struggling in. There is a house and a placement in your chart that I can show you that will open up a whole new door of like a brain thought and a brain blast almost, you know, like an a light bulb moment can go off so quickly with just one placement. And so those soul map readings, the hour long ones, are my favorite because we can get a little more specific to the person's needs.

My girl is spiritually gifted, you guys and very great at what she does and I would never ever send any of you her way if I didn't trust her fully. And like I said, this year has been my best and also my hardest. And Casey's wisdom and experience and and intuitive gifts in this department have really helped me go through the hard things and really transform abundantly, financially, physically, emotionally, spiritually because of her gifts. So you guys go check her out at Casey Nicole at K A S E Y N I C O L E E E. She's remarkable. She's funny, she's beautiful inside and out. Case you're my favorite girl. Happy birthday. Happy, Happy, happy birthday. December 22, 1996 was the greatest day of my life. And honestly, I knew that I, I birthed the person that would forever change me in all the beautiful ways. So thank you so much. I love you.

I love you too, mom. Thanks for birthing me. It's been a fun 2016 Sears with you.

You guys, if you love this episode, please share it with somebody. Do not be afraid to reach out to me or Casey if you are driving and couldn't write it down. Just find me and ask me where this magical creature can be found and and let her pour a little bit of of love and light into your life. You will not leave. The same as always. We are here wishing you love, light and transformation.

I'm so happy you enjoyed the Leadership Formula podcast. Please help us spread the word about this show by sharing it with a friend and leaving a written Apple podcast review. If you have any follow up questions to this episode, you can DM me directly on Instagram at tracyomalley. You can also find additional resources on my website@traceeomalley.com I'm excited to lead you into the next level of your your life.