EP361: ENNEAGRAM 101 - What is the Enneagram and why do you need it in your life?

So maybe you are just hearing about the Enneagram for the very first time, or somebody in your inner circle or family is like talking about this Ennea thing and you don't even know what the hell it is, and you want to learn more about it. Well, on the front ends of the week, I am going to be bringing you enneagram101 episodes, which are all the little tidbits and information regarding things and parts of the framework of the Enneagram. And on this week's episode of the enneagram 101, we're talking about what it is. What is the Enneagram and why the heck do you need it in your life? Because if you're like me, I don't give a what it is. I want to know what is in this for me. And if you are anything like me, which I'm sure you are, you are going to benefit a lot from understanding what is in this for you. In all of these enneagram101 episodes today, we're talking about why you need this in your life. And trust me, after over a decade of of not just understanding and integrating this in my own life, but helping thousands and thousands of people all over the world integrate this beautiful tool in your life, in their lives, I promise you, there's a lot in here for you. So let's go.

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I know you may have heard about the Enneagram or someone told you you need to know all about it. So here you are. But what the hell do you do with it? Great news. You are in the right place. Lead with the Enneagram is the show where you will actually learn how to use this incredible growth tool and apply it in all areas of your life, personally and professionally. Hi, I'm Tracy. And to be honest with you, I was a skeptic of the Enneagram before I started to actually integrate it into my life. In fact, in true enneagram 8 style, I told my therapist to F off when she wanted me to dive into it well over a decade ago. Now that I have more than a decade of experience using the Enneagram and working on myself in my family with those closest to me, building my own bulletproof leadership. Sales teams with one on one clients, couples, leading workshops for top Fortune 100 executives, and speaking to large audiences all across the globe about this powerful tool, I've got the proof and deep understanding of how to help you implement this into your life. And instead of it just being some fun thing you heard about, the Enneagram can be A complex model. But with me as your guide, I will show you how to first lead yourself in a powerful, effective, and compassionate way, and then help you lead others that way in your life as well. This podcast will have powerful conversations with guests, live typing sessions, as well as solo episodes of breaking down dynamics of the Enneagram and how they impact your life, career, and relationships. So now let's dive in.

We are diving into enneagram 101. And for those of the you that have been around a while, or if you're new to the show, the first episode of the week will be definitely more about information and bits and pieces about the Enneagram. As you guys know, I say this all the time. Information doesn't equal transformation. But I know a lot of you are new to the Enneagram, are excited about it. Maybe a friend told you you needed to know about it. So I thought, like, the first part of the week being information, the second part of the week being more integration. And today we are going to be talking about, in our Enneagram 101 Little Series, what is the Enneagram and why do you need it in your life? Because it is way more than this fun, little, trendy, cool thing that you share about yourself. And it's way more than just a label or a box we put ourselves in. If you know what you're doing with this, this can be probably one of the most transformational tools you will ever have in your life. And how do I know this to be true? Because your girl came into this thing kicking and screaming. I was one of those people that was like, what is this? My. My therapist wanted me to partake in it. And if you've heard the story about how I was introduced to the Enneagram, you know, I came a little bit kicking and screaming. You know, I know for many of us, we did make decisions. We use discernment on what's in this for me. Right. And. And valid like. Valid like, yes. My. I make my living talking and teaching and integrating the Enneagram with people just like you all the time. And so why is this important to you? Well, first of all, you landed here, so this must mean you're interested in leadership, the Enneagram, all of it. But because I'm so passionate about helping you integrate this in your life, I think it's really important you understand what it is, what's in it for you, and why you need this in your life. And, you know, taking you back over 11 years ago now, when my therapist is like, I Want you to do this Enneagram thing. And I was like, go f yourself. Like, honestly, I don't need another label. I got enough issues kind of going on in my life. I don't need something to confuse things things anymore. And to be very clear with you, when you understand not just your type, but the components that are attached to to you within your Enneagram type, this can accelerate transformation personally and professionally. And I'll get to that. But what is the Enneagram? Right? It is. You know, I'm going to keep this really simple because we're, we're getting back to basics with this 101 stuff. The Enneagram is this beautiful language that has nine basic archetypes within its framework. And within that framework, all nine types have a different perspective and different lenses in which they view the world. They also have very distinct motives and distinct fears. Now, where the Enneagram gets kind of sideways with the online testing and why many of you that have maybe taken an online assessment before, maybe this tool isn't landing with you. You don't. The beauty and power with it is because a lot of times they're inaccurate because those online assessments are so focused on behaviors. Now, if you have been in the personal development world at all for any length of time, you and I both know that the behaviors that we kind of portray out in the world usually are a coping mechanism or a cover to guard and protect our biggest fears from happening. And so why love the Enneagram so much specifically is because it uncovers your main core motive. When you understand why you do what you do in every situation. This makes streamlining where you get off track, where your blind spots might come up, where you get tripped up from time to time. If you understand, like, ah, I'm procrastinating because my core fear is, you know, insert it based on your Enneagram type. You can reverse engineer and troubleshoot that with a lot more compassion, with a lot more efficiency and a lot more effectivity, if that's even a word.

To help you move through that. Also, like when you wonder why certain things when, especially if you're playing the comparison game out there in the world, you wonder why certain things motivate somebody else and they don't motivate you. And you're actually beating yourself up about that. Like this is where this can give you more freedom. You know what, what motivates an Enneagram 3? I wish I was motivated like an Enneagram 3 sometimes because they just like to win, right? Like, I'll Use the three as an example. They, like, see a goal, hit a goal. A lot of us wish we were threes, right? But I'm not motivated by winning necessarily. I'm motivated by autonomy and independence. And me understanding that takes a lot of the beating myself up out of the game. Do I have to get a little bit more strategic to perform? Yes. Do threes have their own issues? Yes. But within the Enneagram type and what it is, understanding that there's nine different perspectives within the world that we live in, nine different motives and nine different fears. Not only does it help you streamline your growth process and accelerate that transformation, but the other. Aha. That will happen for you as you understand and learn about the Enneagram is the eight other different perspectives that you don't necessarily default to. There's a beautiful teachable growth moment in there, I gotta tell you. In understanding that there were eight other different perspectives in which other people viewed the world. There isn't a right or wrong way in which we view the world. Where we default to is where we default to based on our core fears and our core motives. But really in intimacy and communication and relationships and leadership, understanding that there are eight different ways in which people might see the world allowed me to listen more than I spoke, have compassion where maybe I didn't before, and communicate more effectively why this is important, and understanding why other people are motivated differently.

You know, especially when there's conflict, we can take things so personal. And now I'm not taking away the fact that it can feel really personal, especially when things are getting heated or, you know, our biggest fears are being kind of exposed a little bit. I'm not saying it doesn't feel personal or it doesn't get intense. It does. No doubt about it. But understanding this framework will allow you to understand that it isn't as personal as it may feel sometimes. And we can learn to communicate, communicate a little more effectively with someone else who has maybe a different perspective than you. Also, it will open up your mind and help you become a little bit more well rounded and more inclusive and more discerning.

And also create deeper bonds and more support and have more depth to your relationships. Now, what do you use the Enneagram for? Well, if it involves people, you can say everything. I will say, you know, next to my faith, the Enneagram is the number one growth tool I've ever used. And I've got 51 years or so. 51 and a half years. Oh my goodness, 51 and a half years of life and experiences. Lived. And for the last 11 or 12, I've used the Enneagram, the way that it helps you grow first for yourself, understanding and having new awareness for yourself. Now I'm going to say this. Being more self aware doesn't necessarily mean it's always easier. There are times I wish I wasn't as self aware. But for the long game in which, you know, life is, life is here to play. We're here to play the long game and to be here and experience the full journey. So that when we get to the end of this, this lifetime, we know we have explored the full human experience. But in that self awareness, although sometimes it's challenging and hard, it also unveils new self compassion and self honoring practices. This is also where you can discern the right people for you. The right one or the ones that aren't, doesn't mean they're necessarily wrong or bad, but maybe they're, they're done with your part of the story. Things like that. The Enneagram can also. This is, you know, a huge thing because even if you're just understanding yourself, at some point you have to go out into the world, whether it's in your homes, in your friendships, in your relationships, in your professional life, if you're a parent. My goodness, how understanding and integrating the Enneagram and understanding the nine different perspectives and the nine different motives and the nine different fears which are represented in the framework of the Enneagram. Me integrating and understanding this has, oh my goodness, my relationships that I choose to have in my life. Specifically the ones with my children who are in their mid-20s. I have a boy and a girl, an enneagram 2 son and an enneagram 7 daughter, my partner in life at this juncture in my life. You know, I've been divorced.

Probably won't get remarried, but like, this is the one for me to go out the distance. I know for a fact without understanding this, there would have been a lot more turbulence and.

A longer way to get to the harder conversations. The friendships that I have in my life, the support in which I have in my life, the conversations that are had because of my integration and understanding and the people in my life that I've been blessed to educate. The relationships are more in depth and more soulful and especially knowing, like, you know, you never know how many days you got here. I want all my relationships, the ones that I choose to have in my life personally and professionally, to be their very best. And having a framework of communication and understanding and compassion for other people, especially People that are wired differently than me, which pretty much every relationship in my life is different than me. Understanding this and integrating this allows those relationships and those conversations, especially the harder ones, especially the ones that might be a little disruptive from time to time, which they're important in all relationships. Right? The Enneagram has helped growth in all of those relationships professionally. My goodness.

When you know where your strengths are, where you know where you're motivated, where you know, where you have blind spots, where you know what you are designed for, it can allow you to streamline niching. It can allow you to streamline and make decisions where you want to be in flow. It can allow you to hire more effectively for supportive roles where you aren't strong. This can allow you to understand your money hang ups and money blind spots. My goodness. Super, super powerful. But most of all, the Enneagram provide provides you a beautiful way to communicate with yourself and others in a more effective, beautiful, soulful way. And when you're doing that, quite honestly, everything else falls more, more flow like in your life.

So the Enneagram is just a system and just a framework that helps you when you get off track. I like to say it's kind of like your sole GPS. And I'll do many more enneagram101 episodes that will take you a little bit more of a deeper dive into certain components of that GPS system to help you when you do get off track. But just think about it like if you're, you know, plug in coordinates into your GPS and you kind of go on autopilot and you're listening to what GPS or Siri says to you on your journey, if you take a wrong turn, it's going to tell you. And the Enneagram can kind of serve as that for you. Or if you choose to go a different route, it provides you a way to get back on track in a way that feels more effective, more aligned and feels true to who you are now. How do you, how do you discover your Enneagram type? Well, there are a few different ways to go about it honestly, to use the tool in its most effective, powerful, beautiful, elegant ways. Having the right information. Information is going to be really, really important.

But if you want to take this on a beautiful discovery journey and take your time with it, by all means do so. But it may not land or translate the way that you want to. Especially if you are somebody who has been very intrigued by the Enneagram or you hear people talking about it and the beauty of it and it's not Maybe not landing for you. You know, having somebody guide you through that process will probably be a faster way to get the full experience and the full benefit out of the tool. But I do like to tell people, like, go on a journey of discovering it on your own. If I had done that, I would have honestly tried to fit into the Enneagram 3 box because it sounds really great and they make it look easy. In fact, I was originally mistyped as an enneagram3, which brings me to online assessments. They are inaccurate 65 to 70% of the time. If you want to go that route, just know it's a great starting point. But I have done thousands of interviews with people over the last decade and those, Those statistics of 65 to 70% ring true for a lot of reasons. We'll get into in other enneagram101 episodes. But take your time with it. If you're going to go and, and be curious about it, absolutely, take your time with it. But, but I want you to know that it is about what motivates you. And if you've experienced trauma or you're a high achiever and you're really good at compartmentalizing your life chances of those online assessments being wrong, or even you going on a journey where you kind of go into the wrong box.

That might happen and you might not move as fast in transformation and growth as you would like it too. And for somebody that is a high achiever into personal development, I know because I once I understood the beauty of this, I was like, oh no, I need the right information and I need it right now because I want to know exactly.

How to move through this. I was 40 years old when I was introduced to this. So I was like, okay, I've already got 40 years under my belt. I don't want to spend the next 40 years trying to do this the hard way. Right. But absolutely get curious about the nine different types. And, and if you're somebody like, that kind of rings true. That kind of rings true. That kind of rings true. I want you to look at the motives of those types. And if you're somebody like me that originally was like, well, certain things motivate me differently. It might appear that way. But the more that you kind of go on this self discovery, self awareness, self compassion journey, you're going to recognize that the more in depth you get with yourself, more curious you get with yourself, you're going to see that there's some common themes that lies within the motives and within the fears. But like I said, if You've experienced a lot of traumas and, and stuff in your life or you know, all those other things that maybe are tripping you up. Even with the best personal development out there, you might want to take this other option in discovering your Enneagram type. And that's doing my assessment. Like I said, I've been at this for 11 years now and done thousands and thousands of interviews with people. I've gotten very, very good at correctly helping people be typed on the Enneagram. And the assessment that I currently use has a 95% accuracy rate. Not only that, when you take my assessment, you get a customized blueprint that I have made for you that gives you basically your gps, your sole GPS in a handbook.

And it's super powerful. When you have the right coordinates and the right information, you can go off roading all you want, but when you have the right information, you know how to get back on track. So I do highly recommend if you are somebody who has taken an online assessment, but maybe you haven't been able to use this tool the way that you've heard about or you hear me talk about, it might be time to do my online assessment and get your blueprint or, you know, you want to dive deeper, go ahead and do a power session with me those 90 minutes. I did one today with somebody who is just spectacular. What we can accomplish in 90 minutes through not only understanding your type, having the right information, understanding all the components tied to your type, but how to integrate this in your life can be something that's really, really, really powerful for you. So what are your next steps? Well, I would say if you are intrigued by the Enneagram I have, this is episode number 360 or 61. I think you have plenty of information that you can kind of dive into. Go on a binging, binging streak with this podcast. There are several, several hundred for you to choose from. I'm not somebody who wants to necessarily guide you to a book because I think information can be a little overwhelming and information doesn't equal transformation. So I'd much prefer kind of like listen to the pod.

If you do my blueprint, then there are certain books that I might recommend to you. But I have some upcoming episodes on integration. I will bring you interviews with people that have done my assessment, that have deeper, more in, in depth questions. Now, how do I integrate some of this in my life? I definitely recommend you'll be listening to those. I learned so much from listening to other people, be coached or ask questions.

And for more enneagram101 episodes. On the front end of the week we will be diving into like things about the wings, the stances, the subtypes, the tri types, the growth number, the stress number, all sorts of the complexities and the depth of the tool of the Enneagram. The Enneagram isn't necessarily complicated, but it is complex and so I will be absolutely bringing more little nuggets to you. If you want a certain part of the Enneagram talked about, you can follow me on Instagram and send me a dm. I'm always open to what you want to learn about. You know, as somebody who has been in this tool for over a decade, I kind of even forget sometimes what it felt like to be a beginner in this. So I love your feedback. I love you telling me what you want to hear more of. So you can go to Tracy_ O' Malley on Instagram to kind of shoot me a DM. Or you can go to the website tracyomally.com there's a contact email there. You can always send something there. The website is also where you can find.

The place to get your blueprint or do a one on one session or you know, have me in your back pocket for a little while. All those things are@tracey O' Malley.com the work with me section. In the meantime, I hope that you find so much love for yourself in your Enneagram journey. Honestly, it has allowed me to look at myself and and care and honor myself in ways that I never could in the first 40 years of my life. So I will continue to bring this beautiful tool into the hearts and homes of many of you all over the world. Stay tuned for later in the week. We will have a special integration episode helping you take this information and put it into your life in action so that you can accelerate transformation and have the most meaningful juicy time here on earth. And until next time.

I'm so happy you enjoyed the Leadership Formula Podcast. Please help us spread the word about this show by sharing it with a friend and leaving a written Apple Podcast review. If you have any follow up questions to this episode, you can DM me directly on Instagram at traceyomalley. You can also find additional resources is on my website@tracy o'malley.com I'm excited to lead you into the next level.