EP423: The CEO of You: Running Your Inner Boardroom with the Enneagram

Episode 423 the CEO of you. You're making high level decisions every single day. Hiring, scaling, launching, leading. And from the outside, it looks like you've got it all under control. But here's the truth most won't admit. If you haven't examined who's making those decisions inside of you, you're not leading. You're reacting. Most leaders are still being run by the version of themselves that had to survive, not the one who was born to lead. You make intensity for authority, strategy for sovereignty, noise for momentum. And your team and family can feel it. You can have the best business model on the planet, but if your internal boardroom is run by chaos, ego and reactivity, eventually the whole thing cracks. This episode isn't about managing people better. It's about managing power better. Your own. I'm going to walk you through how your Enneagram type, your tri type, and your instinctual drive are quietly influencing every move you make. And how to stop giving the mic to the part of you that's still running on fear. Because integrated leadership isn't soft, it's surgical. You are the CEO. Let's make sure you're the one running the meeting. Hey. Hey. And welcome to the Enneagram Edge. I'm your host, Tracy o', Malley, Enneagram expert leadership coach, recovering control freak, and your personal translator for the shit you keep repeating but don't totally understand yet. Now, if you're new here, buckle up. This is absolutely not another fluffy Enneagram podcast where we talk about how sweet it is to be an Enneagram too and bake cookies for your friends. No, this is the real deal. This show is about using the Enneagram as a tool for transformation. Not just information and definitely not some party trick. Because knowing your type is cute, but embodying your highest expression, that is where your edge is. Every week, I'm bringing you the truth behind the types and the hype. How to stop self sabotaging, lead like a damn legend, and actually understand the people in your life without wanting to scream into a pillow. Or if you're an Enneagram, ain't like me not throat punch someone. We'll talk about leadership, relationships, business, healing, high performance, and why couples therapy isn't working. But fully understanding your Enneagram blueprint might just save your marriage. I'll drop solo episodes behind the curtain coaching, and the occasional rant when someone calls the Enneagram just a personality test. So if you're ready to stop playing small and start showing up with unshakable clarity, confidence, and compassion for yourself and others. This is your space. You've got an edge now let's use it. Hey. Hey. Welcome back. And today's episode is for the leader in you who knows how to command a room, but might still be getting steamrolled by the voices in your own head. And trust me, I get this one at a deep, deep level. And I've worked with founders, C suite executives, high level coaches, powerhouse entrepreneurs and beyond. And I can tell you what breaks your leadership. What breaks your leadership isn't what's happening externally. It's almost always who's running the show internally. And unless you understand how to read your inner boardroom through the lens of the Enneagram, you're probably flying blind a little bit. And I get it. You know, for the longest time, it feels like we're throwing shit up at the wall Hop. Something sticks. Personally, professionally. And it wasn't until I harnessed the beauty of the framework of my Enneagram type that not only did I not energetically bankrupt myself all the time, there was a lot of less. A lot less wreckage to have to clear. You know, and I know you are the CEO of your life, your business, your legacy, but who's. Who's actually running the meetings inside of you? You know, you have this internal boardroom. Some parts are really loud and some of them are a little subtle or even hiding underneath some of that loudness. And for those of you that maybe are more quiet, like flip flop, that if you're not consciously in the chair, your patterns will be your coping mechanisms, your protective is going to kind of be running the show and create frustration, maybe have you playing small, not living the life that you want, not being honorable in your relationships like you want. So we're going to break down the key players in this. Your core Enneagram type is the CEO instinct, right? This is where your core motives are, your core fears. And each Enneagram type is very unique and very special. There's not one that's better than the other. The wings are your advisors. You've heard me talk about it. I call them the supporting cast a lot of the time. And you need both. You need both. Both to have this. This range, if you will. They both bring something very special to the table. And for those of you that have been around a long time, when I talk about the Wings, you know, and a lot of Enneagram teachings out there, you know, they teach you about leaning heavy one way or the other, or identifying with one, just think about it. If you are a bird or an airplane, if you only have one wing, what's going to happen, right? You're going to circle, you're going to crash, or both. Okay, so the wings, they're the advisors, the tri type, your tri type. This is next level Enneagram shit you all. And if you get your blueprint and upgrade to a 30 minute reading with me, we go through your tri type. And for those of you that do the deep dive sessions with me or workshops with me, we go deep into the tri type because this is, this is nuanced. This is where it gets really cool because the tri type is your strategist, your connector and your executor, like all three. And you have a very unique strategy with your tri type on what that looks like your subtype or your instinct. This is the CFO of your energy. This gets what prioritized when you're under pressure and the subtype. This is why all those online assessments are inaccurate 65 to 70% of the time because it doesn't take this into consideration. This is where nature and nurture kind of collided. This is where, you know, your life experience kind of comes into play into the expression of your Enneagram type and what that might look like. This is why you can have like two Enneagram fives right next to each other or any other of the types. And if they're instinct and their subtype is a little bit different, this is, this is why a lot of you are mistyped. So you can get your Enneagram blueprint. With my assessment, it's over 95% accurate. Like I said, you can upgrade to the reading. It's really cool. All right, so those are the key players in your Enneagram framework when it comes to being the CEO of your life and managing, managing everything in a way that feels really, really good for you. So who gets the mic when you're triggered, right? When you're under pressure, your default voice grabs the mic. The pattern that's been running this show since survival was necessary. And for the longest time even, you know, my default voice, my enneagram8ness, like all the dysfunctional stuff, when I felt that pressure, when I felt, you know, the core fear of my enneagram type is betrayal or vulnerability or violation, it gets hyper fixated, right? And it starts screaming. And not always, you know, did, did I bring in the advisors and my strategist, my connector, my executor or the cfo, right? It was just like everybody else. And I'm going to Run the show. And having the right key player, using their voice at the most effective times is where this gets really beautiful, right? And this is where leadership, your own and others go sideways. When a high achiever, for example, is emotionally hijacked by the unintegrated part of themselves, all hell breaks loose. And you know, on paper or to, you know, the Instagram world and the social media feeds and all the. And even, maybe even your P and L spreadsheet, right? On paper, you have the receipts, timelines, you know, all of it to show that it's working out for you. But inside, you know, you know, it's not. It's not working. So how do you become the chair, Right? You don't fire any part of you, right? CEOs, think about it. A CEO has a full crew working with and for them, so they can make decisions of clear mind, of. Of clear space, right? And this is why the Enneagram framework is so powerful. You're way more than your Enneagram type. Now that, again, is where your core fears and core motives. And it's really, really important to understand this, this, you know, home base for you. But you have to talk to the advisors so that you can effectively move. Like I said, you don't fire any part of you, but you have to know how to effectively lead them. Your wings, your instincts, your tri type, your subtype, all the things. So you have to listen to your core Enneagram type, but you don't have to let it steamroll the whole thing. And so often, most of my life, I did that, right? It's like. It's like. That's cute. Hold my beer. I'm just going to kind of run rogue here. And I know many of you are doing this, and we come by it so innocently. This is the part by default, right? This is. This is our default. That doesn't mean we're operating by design, right? It doesn't mean you change who you are, but you want to operate more by design with your core support of advisors, so you can listen to your core Enneagram type. And like I said, knowing where the motive is coming from. This will also help you understand why you get triggered, right? When your core motive or your core fears are about to be compromised or. Or imposed upon. Of course, if you don't check in with the advisors, you are going to go rogue. And you might leave a lot of wreckage in the. In the path. Not always a good thing, trust me. So consulting all three centers of your intelligence, and this is where the tri Type comes into play. And I love teaching and helping people integrate the strategies of your three centers of intelligence. Because if you didn't know in your tri type, which, like I said, we break down in the, the readings that I do or the deep dives or the workshops that I do, we talk about where you dominate in the other centers of intelligence. Your core enneagram type is the center of intelligence you go to first, right? It's your home base, right? So if you're an 8, 9 and 1, your core set or your, your design center of intelligence is the gutter instinctual center. If you're 2, 3, 4, your core center of intelligence that you go to first is a feeling center. And for my five sixes and sevens, your you go to the thinking center first. But. And we do use the other two centers, right? And where you dominate in the other two centers gives you a whole new set of tools, strategy, really cool things, right? One of my best friends, she's an eight like me, but we dominate differently in the other two centers. So even though we were motivated similarly, we fear very similarly. We respond under stress very similarly. The strategy we use when we're feel like when we use our feeling and our thinking is very different because I dominate like a 2 in the feeling center and a 6 in the thinking center. So that's the 8, 2, 6 tri type. So that's how that works. She is an 8, 4, 7, right? So we have one in each center. And that gives you new tools, new strategies, and new understanding of how you process thinking, feeling, and doing. Okay? So consult with all three centers of intelligence. And when you know what you're working with, you can lean on these strategies or, and you can also see where there might be a little bit of dysfunction. And I true transparency, like I can overcompensate like a two sometimes and over give and not ask for what I need, right? And also the good part about that is I have so much compassion and empathy, thank God, in the work that I do and in my thinking center, dominating like a six and, and using the six thinking strategy, it's why nobody can pull one over on me ever. I can poke holes through anything. I can reverse engineer. It's why I'm a great business coach as well and why I work with, you know, companies like Google and, and all sorts of different companies because my strategist brain like a six is so rock solid. And that being said, my six has been a pain in the ass the last year and a half because it overthinks. It's all the what ifs, the worst case scenario thinking, right. So understanding how you dominate in those centers will be really important in consulting them. Watch where your instincts hijacks your leadership. And the instincts are self preservation, one on one or sexual instinct and social instinct. In my assessment that I do, I let you know where you dominate. And this is really, really important. If you're a self preservation type, doesn't matter what type you are, safety, security, comfort is going to be on high alert and how this affects you. If you're a one on one type like I am or a sexual type, it doesn't mean sexual, but it's that intensity of experience, the interpersonal experience, really important to know and how this affects us. Right. This is what makes you great and also where a blind spot could be in all three of these instincts. If you're a social instinct, you think about like the collective, the whole grand scheme of things and how it affects the we. Right. Understanding this about yourself and calling in those advisors will help you navigate and hold your boardroom in a beautiful way. Okay, what part of you is speaking right now? These are key things to ask yourself. What part of you is speaking right now? Now, Right. And this is, you know, why being typed accurately with my assessment is important because you're going to know, you're going to get to the root of things very, very quickly. If you think about it like I know you've heard about like the, the laws of like six or seven layers deep, right. When you have your enneagram type, it's like the fast pass to the core, right. So what part of you is speaking right now? Number two, is this voice that's speaking strategic or protective? Right. And what would integration look like? And when you know your framework, this is also really cool because you can see when you have your correct enneagram type, you can see what your growth number looks like. And kind of where you know, the highest level of you operates doesn't mean you live in that number. Right. But you know, kind of what integration looks like, it's really cool. It's, you know, I, when I do this work, whether you know it's in groups or one on one or even just in a reading you get a lot in 30 minutes. It's so cool because you can, it's basically like I present you this whole roadmap your own compass so that when you are operating like this, you can be more effective, you can be more resourceful, you can be more resilient and if you're getting up there in age like I am, or if you're running a family and a business, like, you have to have strong energy management, this is going to be really, really important for that. You know, I see so often people building from these patterns, the dysfunction. And it's usually when people come to me, it's like they're smiling on the outside. They're like saying, I'm fine. Fine, fine, fine, fine means feelings inside, not expressed. Instead of operating from this divine knowing, this internal knowing, operating by design rather than default. So you can keep building from your patterns or you can reclaim your ed. And that's what the enneagram can provide for you when you practice integrating this and you understand your map and your framework. And that's why I love doing what I do. I know you want to become the leader who doesn't just lead others, but leads your whole damn self. And I know, like, I'm a parent and one of the greatest gifts we can give our children and our partners, quite honestly, is like being in that, right? Like, you know, leading with it, you know, especially if we're preaching, like, personal development to people we love and lead, there's nothing that's going to land that you say if you're not living in that. And this is why, when you know how to effectively lead yourself, no matter what shit show is coming, no matter what is happening in your life, when you're operating by design and not default, that is the surefire way to effectively lead those you love, those you work with, those that you coach, whatever that looks like for you. And that is what integration feels like. And that's what I help people like you do every single day. Once you step into it, you never go back. And you know, it's just like reading any map. Like, you don't just take one glance at it. Like, cool, I got this right. One of my favorite shows is Amazing Race. And I'm, I'm so fascinated. So cool to watch them, you know, when they have to ask people for help because, because they can't. They don't have like a cell phone or watching them try to read a map. You know, we've become so custom to AI for sake. We lean on computers and, and I love that too. Don't get me wrong. But could you read a map if it was put in front of you effectively? Especially when, like, you're on the road, like, think about your life like that. I am so skilled today. I could read not just my map, but anybody that's in front of me. I can read any that's why people are like, holy shit. Like, you see through my soul. I have been reading maps since I was a little girl. If you've listened before, you know the story. But now, because I understand the framework of the Enneagram so deeply, it's like every person that's in front of me is a human, beautiful map. And I could read it effortlessly without even looking, looking down at my atlas, right? This is what you can do when you really, really dive into this and start practicing it real time and turning down all these other roads and checking in with all your advisors. Not just when all hell's breaking loose, but for every day, every single moment. Decisions, feelings, thinking, doing this is how you can go blind and note your map like the back of your hand. And it's fucking awesome. And. But if you need to know who's running your internal boardroom. Boardroom, so that you can be the CEO of your life and operate in that without doing all the parts, right, Number one, you can do. If you haven't done so already, Seriously, go to traceyomalley.com the work with me section. Get your Enneagram blueprint. At the very minimum, at the very minimum, you'll have the right roadmap, you'll have the right atlas, and if you want to take that on your own and start reading it, go for it, right? If you want the guide, that's me. You can do a 30 minute reading with me. It's really cool. I'll break down your whole framework and send you on your way. You can deep dive with me even more. I have, you know, six month, 12 month containers. And right now, this is the best thing. If you want to spend a whole day with me, we will go through your roadmap, your CEO, the strategy for your business, the strategy for your family, your relationships. We do all of it in my VIP days. And I can come to you, or you could come to me. We can talk about what that looks like. But right now, through the end of the week, if you're listening in real time, May 31, I am offering a beautiful discount on my VIP day of a thousand bucks off. You can go to my website, apply there, put in the code VIP day, and you can get it there seriously, in person work, there's no match for like that energy exchange, especially my energy. Like I said, it's pretty intense, but in all the beautiful ways. And I would love to help you set the world on fire with this. You know, I am so excited for what's to come. For the second half of the year we're going into the second half of the year here, and I know that it's a weird year for a lot of you, and sometimes we feel like we're going blind. You know, we're running blind or we can't see effectively because you. You don't have the map in front of you. And I'm just so excited to bring more of this to you. Go grab your customized blueprint or book the VIP day. All the links will be in the show notes. I would love to hear what you're getting from the Enneagram. If you want new Episodes, please feel free to email me. That info is on my website as well or the show notes. You can follow me on Instagram @tracy o', Malley, of course, LinkedIn, Facebook, all the things. But in the meantime, you know, I want you to be operating in full CEO mode and stop being the bottleneck for all. All of your advisors and crew to run effectively. But so often we bottleneck ourselves trying to do all of it from one role. Right? Bring them all together. Let me show you how. It's such an honor to do this work and to see people just, like, live in that and be able to be their truest self and. And not feel like they have to do it all. Right? I know it's you doing it all, but you have all these advisors within yourself that when leveraged effectively, properly and not from a place of chaos and crisis all the time, this is. This is when all the magic happens. And this is how you can get to be my age at 53 and still feel like you're 30 most days. So honored to do this work. I love bringing the Enneagram to you to help you get an edge up on life, personally and professionally. You know, it's. It's pretty awesome. It's pretty awesome. And I know you've got an edge in you, so let's go find it. Until next time. And that's a wrap on today's Dive into the Edge. If this episode hit you in the gut or lit a fire under your ass, good, that means it's working. Here's the deal. Transformation is not a checkbox. It's a damn decision. And the Enneagram, it's your ultimate power tool when you actually know how to use it. If you loved today's episode, share it with somebody who's ready to stop playing small. Subscribe, leave a review, and if you're really feeling brave, shoot me a message and tell me what cracked open for you. Remember, your edge isn't something to be polished down. It's part of you that was always meant to lead. Until next time, stay sharp, stay true, and keep walking your edge.