https://www.listennotes.com/e/491df361ce384b7aa27723b264e94dbb
1 Jul 2025 · 26 min
Tracy O'Malley, an Enneagram coach, goes beyond the basics to explain integration and transformation using the system. She covers practical applications for personal growth and leadership, plus details on her coaching and certification programs.
Let's cut straight to it. You know your Enneagram type. You read the memes. You shared the reels, maybe even told every friend what type they are. Maybe you've even worked with another Enneagram coach. And yet, here you are, still feeling like something's missing. Like you don't know how to use this freaking tool. Maybe you're still stuck in the same patterns when the stakes are the highest, still longing for a breakthrough that actually changes how you show up, not just how you talk about yourself. Because here's the truth no one is going to tell you. Knowing your Enneagram type does not mean knowing yourself. Insight is useless without integration and staying in enneagram101. It's like learning the Alphabet but never writing your own story. So if you're sick of wearing your Enneagram type like a cute name tag, and you're ready to wield it like a sword that carves a life aligned with who you truly are, this episode is for you. Because mastery isn't about memorizing your patterns. It's about transforming them. And today, I'm going to show you exactly what it takes to move beyond basic Enneagram and claim your edge in every part of your life.
Let's go.
Hey. Hey.
And welcome to the Enneagram Edge. I'm your host, Tracy o' Malley, Enneagram expert, leadership coach, recovering control freak, and your personal translator for the shit you keep repeating but don't totally understand yet. Now, if you're new here, buckle up. This is absolutely not another fluffy Enneagram podcast where we talk about how sweet it is to be an Enneagram, too, and bake cookies for your friends. No, this is the real deal. This show is about using the Enneagram as a tool for transformation, not just information and definitely not some party trick. Because knowing your type is cute, but embodying your highest expression, that is where your edge is.
Every week, I'm bringing you the truth.
Behind the types and the hype, how to stop self sabotaging, lead like a damn legend, and actually understand the people in your life without wanting to scream into a pillow. Or if you're an enneagram8 like me, not throat punch someone. We'll talk about leadership, relationships, business, healing, high performance, and why couples therapy isn't working. But fully understanding your Enneagram blueprint might just save your marriage. I'll drop solo episodes behind the curtain coaching, and the occasional rant when someone calls the Enneagram just a personality test. So if you're ready to stop playing small and start showing up with unshakable clarity, confidence, and compassion for yourself and others. This is your space.
You've got an edge.
Now let's use it.
Hello. Hello and welcome back to the Enneagram Edge. And you know, I, as you know, am obsessed with the Enneagram. Not for cutesy little entertainment, though, you know, And I fell into the Enneagram, obviously by accident, resistant to it actually kicking and screaming. And it was within the first few minutes of my surrender when I humbled myself enough to understand that this might actually help me get out of the box that let me life put me in. I put myself in. The people in my life that were well intended put me in that I understood the beautiful power of it. And it's when my. I don't like to call it obsession, even though I'm obsessed with it, began. It's when I understood the transformation, that this could accelerate not just in my life, but in my family's life. And then obviously now with thousands and thousands of other people over the last decade. So I want to start with the basics, literally, because there are limitations to enneagram 101, as it's taught in most places today is where self awareness goes to die. And this is the problem. Not just in Enneagram world, but personal development world. We listen to the podcast. Please keep listening, because that's important. We read the books, we take the courses, right? Pop quizzes, memes, cutesy reels. Maybe that make you feel seen. Maybe like I said, you've even hired an Enneagram specialist to help you understand this more, but it doesn't actually help you change. And then actually you end up feeling more frustrated, maybe even more shame. It's easy to mistake recognizing your patterns for transforming them. You know, I talk about this a lot, you know, from the neck up. You may cognitively understand all of this, but when shit's hitting the fan or you have something you need to react to, respond to, quite often we go into the old conditioning, the patterns that have kept us safe, certain feeling significant in some way. And that doesn't actually help us transform. That just helps us survive. And that's where most people get stuck, right? You're collecting facts about your Enneagram type instead of using it as a tool, a precision like tool, right? Think of a surgeon with a scalpel, right? They have to know how to be meticulous with it, with precision. And this is how you can understand and use the Enneagram. And I'm here to. To show the way with that, a lot of times you might even confuse talking about your Enneagram with actually living differently. And, you know, I've done this work for a long, long time. Like I said, worked with thousands of people. And, you know, several people have, you know, done multiple workshops with me. And each time I start to see and hear and understand that they're getting it, they're understanding the integration. And it's just like learning anything. We don't learn it one time here at one time, and it' check the box. I am transformed. I know how to use this. The most beautiful, powerful tools take guidance, take practice. And that's what we're going to do, right? As long as you stay in enneagram101, you'll keep looping the same cycles, repeating the same reactions, and calling it, this is just who I am. Or maybe I'm not made for this or whatever story you are telling yourself. So here's some signs that maybe you have outgrown enneagram 101. And I know if you're here listening, you have a desire to understand more, to. To use this tool in a more beautiful, powerful, effective way. So how do you know you're ready for something deeper? Well, let me tell you what I see in people who are hungry for mastery. And, you know, I have had several people that have heard of the Enneagram. It's, you know, pretty worldwide trendy at this point. And then they sit with me or attend a workshop or hire me for their or in their family. And all of a sudden they're like, holy. This is not the Enneagram that I knew. Right? You are like the master's program. And again, I am not knocking any of the other Enneagram teachers out there. We need kindergarten teachers. We need elementary school teachers. We need elementary Enneagram teachers. In fact, they are probably who brought you to me. Right? And your desire to learn more, grow more, use this more, become masterful in understanding. This is the master's program. So how do you know that you've outgrown the basics? Number one, you're bored with the same old one time. Are you Conversations. Because they feel really, really shallow. Now, I love it because it's a great kind of conversation starter. But a lot of times I'm sure that you'll get the people with the deer in the headlights as you start kind of going a little bit deeper and it's like, great. I can't take this conversation any further. Maybe number two, your patterns don't just frustrate you. They feel suffocating. And you know you're made for more. And this is personal development all the way around, right? Like, I know we're going to the events, podcasts, courses, hiring coaches, mentors, all the things. And the more you know, the more frustrating it gets. Because you can taste it, right? And same thing with the Enneagram. Like, even people that have taken my blueprint and have the accurate information, when you're in crisis or in reaction or responding to life, we will go to our old conditioning every time. My conditioning is no joke. And it is powerful and so reconditioning. You have to take the information and know how to integrate it. And it's always frustrating at first, and it's always messy and sometimes even painful, right? But I know you know you're made for more. And you know that this is the fast track to help you accelerate and escalate your transformation. Number three. You're craving nuance. You want to know why you do what you do at the root level, not just what your Enneagram type says. And this is where, you know, the deeper parts of the Enneagram framework come in that a lot of people don't teach at the level that I teach it, right? Understanding your instinctual stacking. Understanding how to use the wings. How to understand how the wings might kind of trip you up from time to time. How to use the other framework. Framework like a compass to help you understand where you're at without the judgment, without the shame, without the criticism. And instead, compassion, kindness and curiosity. Okay. Number four. You're seeing how your patterns sabotage the things that matter most to you. Your relationships, your leadership, your money story, your peace. And you want tools to break free. And you know you can taste it. You've been listening to me. You've been free, following me. You see how I use the Enneagram to transform my life, my family's life, my essence. I'm still the same spicy girl that I am, but I have this beautiful compassion attached to it. And I know that you know this is the tool to help you do that. However, you're still in kindergarten class. It's time to step it up. So what does Enneagram mastery really mean? Mastery means moving beyond. Who am I to. How am I showing up? It's about taking your self awareness into the moments that matter when you're triggered hurt or facing a big decision that scares the fuck out of you. It's about learning your subtype and your instincts so that you can stop fighting the shadows and the shit you don't even see. It's understanding your wings as resources and a supporting cast, not just boxes and not just these cute things that you hear about on the Instagram. It's knowing how your tri type, this is next level. Enneagram, by the way, creates blind spots and brilliance and how critical thinking and emotional intelligence goes to the next level when we understand this and using that to your advantage. Mastery is not about perfection. It's about catching yourself faster, repairing sooner, and aligning with your true self longer. And when we do that, it feels so damn good. It's about bringing your Enneagram insights into your daily life, so. So that you can shift patterns in real time, not just professionally and personally as well. So why my approach to the Enneagram changes everything, right? And this is where I need you to hear me very clearly. I don't teach the Enneagram as entertainment. I really will not. It's why I was resistant to being your Enneagram girl. You know, like, seriously. My ego had to get over itself because I teach it as a power tool, especially with beautiful intent and. And in integrity, always. Because. Because here's what's different about the way that I guide this work. I don't stop at your core type. I help you map your full Enneagram architecture, your subtype wings, tri type, instinctual stack. Because knowing the whole map gives you that precision. I teach you how to use the Enneagram in real time when shit's hitting the fan, when you are on the verge of, like, your edge going to the next level, right? When everything that you're afraid of, every insecurity that comes up will come into play when you're triggered, when fear takes the wheel, when your old patterns tried to protect you. This is where integration happens. And this is where I am the specialist so that you can recondition how you respond to things. I believe in radical honesty with compassion. Right? They call me the velvet hammer. Right? I will deliver exactly what I know you need. I hear you. You tell me I'm ready. I know that I'm here for more. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know the drill, right? And I also that maybe other coaches, other people in your life are keeping you smaller. They. They only know what they know, right? The thing is, is I deliver all of this with so much compassion because I do understand. I. I am my own best teacher, or I'm my own best student, quite honestly. And I. I have to walk my talk. And as much as I'm hard on myself, I equally meet myself with Compassion. And I do that with you. You'll never get coddled, but you'll never be shamed. You'll always feel nurtured, protected and guided. I hold a fierce, loving mirror so that you can see what's really holding you back. So that you can break it once and for all. And so that it become becomes sustainable for, for you and what you're here to do. I also give you actually actionable practices, not just vague advice. Right? This is why people do take the time to spend time with me, so that we can know the application in your life in real time. You'll leave my spaces with directional tools you can apply that day so that you don't just know better, you actually do better. And that feels really good. I see people that come to me and it's like, you know that first time you do something when you're a child and you're just so giddy and excited and proud of yourself. This is what I do with you and why this matters for you, right? You're like, great trace, that's cool. But here's the thing. When you master the enneagram at this level, you don't just feel seen. You become effective. Your relationships, every relationships, personally, professionally, romantically. Parenting gets so much deeper. Your leadership becomes magnetic. Your life aligns with your true self instead of your old survival patterns. And that's the edge the world needs you to come to, to claim. You know, when I think about the first area of my life this really transformed was my home team, you know, and my kids were teenagers at the time. And if you've been around teenagers or parented teenagers, you know, that's not always so easy. And coming off the track record that I held, this was going to prove to be even more challenging. And my understanding and integration of this beautiful tool rapidly immediately transformed the relationships that I had with my kids. I'm a single parent and have been for years the sole provider emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. And, you know, unlearning 40 years of conditioning, things that were taught, told and modeled for me, breaking addiction, breaking dysfunctional family patterns and generational stuff, this tool helped me streamline that process. Not just for me, but also the way that I communicated in my home. And, you know, here we are 13 years plus later, and my kids are almost in their 30s. And because of the effectiveness and the integration of this tool, not only do they feel seen, heard, understood, and valued, they are operating in integrity at the highest level, in happiness in all areas of their life. Right. My approach to this also is different because I have been an entrepreneur for 25 years. And most Enneagram teachers out there, again, thank. Thank you for being that most of them aren't entrepreneurs. Most of them were therapists, pastors, somebody that just fell in love with it. But have they actually run businesses for 25 plus years or been in corporate America or both like I have? Right? Not only have I raised kids, I have been through divorce. I have broken family patterns. I have run businesses for 25 years. I have been in corporate America. I've been in many different industries. And so I bring wisdom and perspective and experience that most don't have. So what's the cost of staying in elementary school and Enneagram 101? Well, if you stay in the Enneagram 101, nothing wrong with it if you enjoy it, right? Like, some people just want to know some of the basics, and that's totally okay. But if you're somebody who wants to run a strong family and wants the people that you love and lead to feel seen, heard, understood, valued, and to be a more empowering, effective leader for them, this is really important. Because staying at the elementary level, you'll keep looping, you'll keep explaining your sabotage instead of actually shifting it. You may know better, but aren't doing better. And I'm going to tell you that has a slippery fucking slope because that will lead you down a shame spiral that will keep you stuck and more frustrated than ever. A lot of times you'll keep mistaking insight for growth. Right? You can be insightful and understand all of this. But. But when life keeps lifing you and life keeps feeling smaller than what you know you're here for, you're going to get frustrated. Knowledge without integration isn't wisdom. You know, it's like the difference between being book smart and street smart. And a lot of Enneagram people are super book smart. Right? But when life on the streets gets hard, what are you going to do with all that information? Right? And this is where street smarts and book smarts come together. And this is where integration becomes the wisdom. And your potential doesn't stay locked behind the patterns that you've been carrying for decades. This is when you actually shatter that and break free. And I know you did not come here to stay stuck. You came here to change the game. You came here to own and honor your edge. So how do you step into Enneagram mastery? Right. First of all, if you're listening, thank you. Thank you. You know that you are here with the best mastery Teacher there is in the Enneagram space. So thank you for that. You'll have to seek depth over the dopamine rush. Right. And I love to know things. Like I'm obsessed with anything that helps me understand myself and people more. Since I was a little girl, I've been a student of psychology of some sort. And yes, I also started in 101 in the elementary area. But a lot of times we'll use it as a distraction, as entertainment, as a box that we're checking, like, oh, I'm doing the work, but that's not doing it for you. And chasing memes, even though I freaking love them and I make them, they're fun and everything, but start seeking people who actually embody this work. Hello, that is me. I want you to learn how to apply your insights in real time, right? Not just with yourself, but if you're somebody who loves and leads other people, whether it's your home team, professional teams, or both, like me, especially when you're activated and when you're triggered and afraid, or avoiding hard conversations. Wielding this tool in real time from all the authentic places, like I said, will give you so much more credibility and trust, personally and professionally for the people that you are raising, for the people that you love, for the people that you lead. This will give you that credibility and that like authority in a healthy, respectful way that you know you crave and that you deserve. Prioritizing integration over information. You've heard me talk about this in 420 something episodes. Information doesn't equal transformation. Integration of it does. And that's what I'm all about, right? I can tell you all the things I can fire hose you, all the Enneagram information, but without me kind of explaining what this looks like in real time, in real life, in real situations for you, your clients, your kids, your partners, this is where the magic happens. And practicing what you learn in every single moment, in every single decision, in every single conversation, in every single day, that's how we fast track this and that's what I'm a specialist in. And if you're ready for the deepest level of this work, honestly, it has been a decade in the making. But I want you to consider my Enneagram Master certification, level one. This is where we go through all the information and also real life integration. This is how you'll learn the way that I teach it, right? Or you can work with me privately to unlock the mastery of your life, your leadership and your legacy that you deserve, that you desire, and that I know you crave. So two things. You can go to my website and if you know that you're ready to use this in your own life, just personally, you want to see how this feels. I have VIP coaching. I only have two spots open right now because I go so in depth with people that I only take a few people at a time. And a lot of people this summer is when all of this kind of gets activated. And you don't want to start when. When you're. You're like, oh my God, after the summer and all shit's hit the fan or you're riding the bubble, right? You want to go into the holiday season armored up with this tool and. And load it up with this tool. So if you want to apply for my private VIP coaching, I have 6 month and 12 month month options because like I said, we. We don't just learn this. Check the box like, cool, I got this. No, no, it's not how it works. You can go apply@traceeomalley.com the work with me section. And for those of you that really want to understand Enneagram mastery, you want to use this in your coaching business. You don't have to be an Enneagram coach, but this. If you're a coach of any kind, a leader of any kind, a CEO, you run a team, you run a family, you run a household, Level one of this certification will absolutely change the game. And for my inaugural group that will start September 3rd, it will be a four week kind of level one. We'll meet once a week. You'll get lots of curriculum quality time. With me. It's a live course. It's not a recorded thing. This is me live teaching you the ins and outs of Enneagram mastery. It will be four weeks long, you know, every Wednesday in September. And for those of you that want to. To be part of the inaugural cohort, there is a special. And in the show notes, there'll be a link where you can get that beautiful, special, exclusive offering for the paid in full. And again, this is very affordable as far as certification programs go. Again, this is level one. And if you want to go on to levels two, three, and four, which is like the Holy Grail, Level one is required. And for a lot of you, level one may be all you want. And that's totally okay. And it's why I keep it super affordable, because I recognize that, you know, this is this. This part alone will be a game changer. This part alone will have you feeling more confident in the way that you lead and love people so you can look at the show notes traceyomally.com the work with me section under the certification part. It's there. You can reach out to me on Instagram. There are very limited spots for my first group of Level one certification mastery students. You can reach out to me on Instagram at tracee underscore O' Malley go to traceyomalley.com I would love to hear what you want to learn about. Because here's the thing. I'm a firm believer of when the student is ready, the teacher and tools appear. In every area of my life that has been true. And I know that when this one was dropped in my lap again when I was resistant to it, came into it kicking and screaming immediately, I knew, and it was really downloaded to me, that this would be my life's work. Not just for me and those that I love and lead, but teaching those of you to do the same. Because you didn't just stumble across the Enneagram by accident, right? And you didn't just find this podcast by chance. You're here because you're ready to stop living at the mercy of your patterns and start leading yourself and others with that precision. So if you're done with enneagram101 and if you're ready to claim your edge, like I said, DM me, drop a comment, go apply for my VIP coaching or the Enneagram Map Masters Cert Today, mastery isn't for the masses, but if you're ready to step it up, I'm here for you. And I cannot wait to lead, guide, nurture, love, and protect you every step of the way. Let's find your edge. All right. All right, you guys. Until next time.
And that's a wrap on today's Dive into the Edge. If this episode hit you in the gut or lit a fire under your.
Ass, good, that means it's working.
Here's the deal. Transformation is not a checkbox. It's a damn decision. And the Enneagram, it's your ultimate power tool when you actually know how to use it. If you loved today's episode, share it with somebody who's ready to stop playing small. Subscribe, leave a review, and if you're really feeling brave, shoot me a message and tell me what cracked open for you. Remember, your edge isn't something to be polished down. It's polish. Part of you that was always meant to lead. Until next time, stay sharp, stay true, and keep walking. Your edge.
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