162. HPF - Mastering Life As A Father, Husband And Man

Welcome to another episode of Real Dad Movement Podcast. The point and purpose of these episodes, as always, is to have a point and purpose towards helping you win the second half in life by building a path of becoming the best father, husband, man and member of your community that you can be. We do this with various ways of connecting. Life is connection. And as you hear these words spoken time and time again, know that the driving force of connection in life is energy. Which means that how you turn up as a father, as a husband, as a valued member of society will always start and end with how you turn up as a man within yourself. First. This is why it's my mission, my purpose, our mission, our purpose through Real Dad Movement to inspire, motivate, educate, and guide you into thoughts, feelings, actions, and a change in your belief systems to rise up, cut the shit from your life and live and leave a real legacy. When dads win, everyone wins. And when you win, I win. Let's get moving forward, mate. Right here, right now. Welcome to a special HPF edition. Today we have two guests with us. So it's threesome, the wrong word to use a three way spends.

There's a lot of time in the.

Day, I'll tell you right now. Just piggybacking off an amazing episode we had with Ken not that long ago. If you don't like our podcast, you can right off, just like Ken said, if you. If you're. Yeah. If you can't do four minutes of breathing, that's exactly what we. What we advise to be the next steps. But we've got Ken, our energy coach, and Adam, our head operations man. Boys, welcome. What an episode that awaits. How are we?

It's good to be here. Good to, I suppose, be amongst the. The jungle. Yeah. So exciting. Exciting times.

Yeah, no, it is exciting. I'm a little bit intimidated by sitting next to these two guys, but yeah.

You can right off.

There's the podcast.

We hope you guys enjoyed this episode of. Ken's had a shitload of arm curls. He's looking good, isn't his? Vascularity's through the roof. So we're very. We're very nervous, especially in some of the episodes where I've questioned Ken's height. It's like, I take all that back. I'm sorry, mate. I'm just kidding. This episode, you know, if you don't measure it, you can't master it. And you can.

No, exactly. Right. Because of. Yeah. What, what, what's your baseline? If you don't know your baseline well, then you don't know where you're starting and you don't know where you're finishing. So how do you kind of measure anything if you don't know where your foundation is?

Life is all about getting a gauge on things, isn't it? Because like you said, if we don't even know where our current footing is, what are we even doing? What direction can we head in? How do we even know what direction we should be heading? So the point of this episode, mastering life as a husband, father and man. Especially in the modern world, full of distractions, when you're distracted by something, you're distracted by something purely because a distraction is taking away from something else you probably should be doing. Which means in the chaos and whirlwind of life as a husband, as a father, as a man, not only do we forget things, but we get caught in the fluff of feelings, which means we're not measuring what we should be doing and whether it's your macros. And some of this shit's so fucking simple, right? Like, maybe it's not easy because of all the other hats we wear, but a lot of it is simple, hard, with some guys on their own. But that's one thing we want to open you guys up to today. The evolution of, you know, not just rdm, but our high performance father program. So that's our elite coaching program that really encases all the testimonials, all the results, all the runs on the board, everything you see. Fathers living and breathing, our message of being an amazing father, an amazing man, husband. If you're in a relationship and a member of society, there's got to be tracking, there's got to be measurements in place and how we've evolved. We're going to open that right up for you guys and show you exactly how you can master your life as a husband, as a father, as a man, and what numbers you should be looking for, what you should be tracking. And I guess I'd love to start with probably yourself first, Adam, and then we're going to throw straight to Ken and with yourself, Adam, being a member and now being on the inside as one of our coaches and a core part of what we do. What's been the biggest thing that you've seen since we started really introducing, which will probably be the start of this year, but in a rapid rate to where we are now, the tracking, the graphs, the data, how we're building a rhythm of accountability and cadence for the men on the inside.

I think for me, yeah, I mean, I joined roughly two Years ago. And while the tracking was great, at the time, it was very subjective. So it was, how do you feel about how you're tracking without as much, I guess, tangible data on what's the facts? Because we know that the feelings give us any indication of how we're going. But if we don't have the facts to build that up, are we creating a story in our head? So this is just a way. What we track now is finding a way to. Okay, are my. Are my feelings backed up by what the reality is? So I say I'm handling. I'm handling things pretty well with my family. I'm spending a lot of time with them. Okay, are you having dinner with them? Oh, shit, no, I'm not. Am I spending time with my wife? Well, no, shit, I'm not. So I feel like I'm going really well, but all of a sudden, I'm not doing all those little things that'll build connection. And then in six months, 12 months down the track, my wife says to me, I want a divorce because we don't spend any time together. And it hits me like a ton of bricks because I don't see it. So we're trying to find ways to peel the layers back, to take the actions to then create that connection. That's just one example. But that's what we're doing in all areas of life. Family, softened service. How am I peeling the layers back now? And that level of specificity that we now have with our tracking to find the feelings, okay, and then if my feelings don't quite match the facts, what am I doing about it? What is the reality? And now what are the actions? What's my most important thing that I need to identify off the back of that.

Yeah, couldn't agree more, man. Like, here's the thing, guys. And obviously the members listening to this would know what we do to the T. It's not about being robotic, and it's not about your wife being a fucking checklist. Okay, cool. I've done honey and hands for time. Tick that off. It's about everything that Adam said which represents presence. And what we're doing is we're giving you the best set of eyes possible so you can actually line up a true reality with what's actually happening. What. Not what you think you're doing, not what you think your family needs. What are you actually doing as a father, as a husband, as a man? And all of that connects to one thing. Yourself. Which is why I want to go straight to you, Ken, and go, okay, what's the foundation that we've started to set for these guys? One of the key things, our energy protocol, from which they're actually developing who they are and leveling themselves up so they can be more for everyone else.

I suppose the big thing is what I look for is people level of pain, what they're dealing with on a daily basis or a weekly basis, the stress that they deal with, whether it be physical, emotional or chemical. And then from there we start to analyze and particularly go after the things that, like the lowest hanging fruit to give them the biggest change in day to day life for them, so that they can actually feel the difference, they can see the difference, and also they can turn that into a habit, a daily habit, because the most simple things cost absolutely nothing other than a little bit of time. And this is where we'll go back to what we've been talking about before. Four minutes out of your day just to learn how to breathe a little bit better. We're so caught up in all the other things in life. When the most simple things, it costs you nothing other than four minutes now, really. Like when you start to breathe a little bit better, then what changes does that have on your body? Well, there's a physical change through improving your posture. There's a chemical change through improving gut digestion and absorption and everything else. So that's going to enhance weight loss and then the emotional side of things, then you can start to, when you're dealing with stress is you can start to relax, control your breathing a little bit better. So no matter what happens, whenever we're dealing with stress, the higher level of stress, the more rapid breathing we do. So just one thing in a nutshell is just learn how to breathe a little bit better. And then that's going to change everything, every physiological, biological process in your body. That's all it takes. And it costs absolutely nothing other than four minutes of your time.

It's the when as well, though, isn't it? I guess, like when we're talking about guys on the inside, we track morning routines, night routines. What do you find is the best way to start developing the really simple habits, Ken? Like, what's the best way to start with that and develop it and turn it into a habit? Is it the time of day? Is it the why and the purpose? You just explained, like, what do you think is the best way for these guys to actually stick to it, commit to it, and make it a habit?

Well, you've got to have a game plan. You got to sit down, you've got to have a journal or you've got to have a game plan whenever you start that, it can't be tomorrow, it has to be today, and you have to implement it. The first thing you get up in the morning, no matter what you do, even before you put your foot on the ground, you can literally start your breathing techniques. When you open your eyes up without actually getting out of bed, you're not going to make any noise. You're going to be there, you're going to start to relax. And then from there, that's where your day starts. And so if you're implementing something like that and turning that into a habit, then all of a sudden it's a game changer because that thought process is already in your head before you've even got out of bed. So then from there, that's going to change everything from what we've just spoken about, how breathing changes. But then once you put your foot on the ground, the first kind of placement of your foot on the ground, do you have any physical pain from a sore ankle, a knee, a lower back? Are you stumbling to get out of bed? Now, just by doing a small bit of breathing, that is going to actually increase your heart rate. It's going to get the blood flow moving. And then straight away again, we go back to the that emotional thought that's going to go, okay, now I'm going to set my day up with everything that I need to do to enhance my performance. I want to do one thing better today than I didn't do yesterday. And so it's about the 1 percenters. It's not like about getting, you know, 100 runs on the board. It's really about the 1 percenters. And if you're doing that every day, seven days a week, 30 days a month. Yeah, 365 days a year. Just imagine how much better you can be literally in no time at all. But that's where not just one thing, we can look at the physical, the emotional, and the chemical. And if we're doing one of each of those things, then all of a sudden it turns into more than a thousand things a year. So they've got to become habits, and you've got to journal it so that it does become a habit. Because if you're not writing it down and you're not thinking about it and you're waiting and you're pushing it aside. Well, you know what, we'll go back to the old question. You're not really kind of invested in your own health or anyone around You, So you have to make those changes. Otherwise there's nothing else I can say.

Isn't it crazy though, like when we look at that over the years, especially in the last episode, when it comes to shit talking yourself, people want the big, the big win, the big, the big answer solution, the quick fix to their problems. Yet it's actually the habit that you need to build every day with those 1 percenters that they're doing in a detrimental effect which, like the last episode led to over the years, people will shit talk themselves 70, 80, 100,000 times, yet you won't put that amount of reps into just doing that 1% every single day. Like Ken said, even if you hit five days a week. Okay, cool. So if I'm hitting, you know, roughly around that 80%, then over 365 days, I'm hitting around 320 days. All of a sudden, like you said, three years time, you've just nailed your morning and night routine a thousand times. Is that going to improve your life, yes or no? Well, of course it is. You know, when you talk about game plan, it's really a review and self analysis where. And I'm going to throw to you, Adam, I know when I didn't have a game plan, not only was my life falling apart and turning to shit, but ultimately I wasted so much time and I did shit that didn't even matter. But what was happening in your world, Adam, when you didn't have a game plan? And then I guess on that, what do you see on the inside when we have guys who come to us without a game plan and then we develop one and they execute on it?

I mean, years ago when I signed up, I, yeah, definitely didn't have a game plan. I was very busy, but I was busy being busy because I never really knew what my most important thing was. So I was constantly running around doing tasks that I thought were important without any context. So I was just doing the next thing that came up. And when I'd review, which was very rarely at the end of the week, the end of the month, I'd look back and go, I've kind of feel like I've done a lot of shit, but I've achieved nothing. And even, you know, not that long ago, we had the gap, we were waiting for the journals and I could feel myself slipping because I didn't have that daily game plan. I was, I knew roughly what I wanted to achieve, so I was still achieving things. But I wasn't as dialed in as I needed to be because I wasn't, wasn't measuring my tasks every day. And that, that was really important. So now, you know, we've got the journals in finally. That that's been a probably a 20% turnaround for me even from, you know, two weeks ago to now, just having that. What's my most important thing? Nailing that. And I'm still getting other stuff done. But if I've nailed my most important thing for family, self and service for that day, I know that. And that's by midday, 2 o', clock, whatever it may be for the rest of the day, I'm free to make decisions, but on the fly because I've nailed what I need to know. And that, that in terms of stress, like Ken mentioned, it just removes it because I'm not busy being busy, I'm busy getting what I need to get done. And then I've just taken that weight off my shoulders. Really, really, really valuable, that journaling in whichever format you choose to do it.

Maximizing the two most valuable things, right, Time and energy. What about some of the guys when they first start or reach out or just men as a whole in general, like in society, fathers, all different hats, what do you see? It could maybe non members, friends, family members. What do you see as a common theme apart from what you described, which I completely agree, like you feel like you're busy, but you don't achieve anything. But in terms of emotions, relationships, what starts to happen, man, when these guys don't have game plans and life just starts to chew them up?

I think the biggest thing for me is they're not making decisions on how they're spending their time. So they'll let outside influences. If you don't have a set game plan that you're committed to, you'll let outside influences dictate to you what your tasks, what your actions should be. So you know that five o' clock news tells you that this is, you know, this is what you should eat. Even though there's, we know there's agendas. So all of these outside influences from the media, from the people that quote, unquote, care about you, that have your best interest at heart, they're throwing all this information at you. And if you don't have that frame where you know exactly what you need to achieve and why you need to achieve it and how you're going to track it, all these things you'll just do what you're told and all of a sudden that may not align with, with what you want and you get, you're in A position like we talk about that 1% every day. If it's not quite the direction you want to go, next thing you know, a year down the track, you're a mile, 10 miles, 100 miles away from where you want to be. And then you sit back and. And for most of us, we don't have that self awareness to sit back and go, well, all those steps I took got me here. They just go, what the fuck happened? How did I get here? With no real awareness of, of what that process was?

Yeah, it's fascinating, man, because we look over and all of a sudden 10 years has passed and it's like, where did all that time go? And this is where I'm at now. And then all of a sudden things start, cracks start happening and look, we all have peaks and troughs in our life to a degree. But the question is, you know, are they, are they more a consistent little climb up and a restabilizing or is it literally an emotional peak, which is a fantasy because you actually haven't done anything, but you think you're going well, and it's met with a big fucking chasm or a void or a massive trough which most guys find themselves in the pit of life. Look, we same with you. The journal, we've had these journals, they're phenomenal. Now we're going to open up some to the public for purchasing this week. But yeah, like, it's just we all need some level of accountability and sometimes it is just these professionally published journals are epic. They've helped me as well. They changed my life when we designed them at the start of the year. Just tracking the right things, like Ken was saying, building a game plan, assessing yourself, yourself, stress levels, daily habits, it's all in there. Like this journal. There's nothing like this in the world. And it's incredible to see how much this helps. And also technology is cool, we're using that now. But the journal has one sole purpose. It's useless for anything else other than exactly what it's designed for. It's fantastic. It's one singular environment for a father to get his shit together and move in the right direction. But Ken, how, like how do we get, how do we find or create the right game plan? Like in your eyes, how do we actually find, Is it the vision work? Is it dialing in your goals? But how do we find the right game plan? And I guess I'd love to get your thoughts on what we're currently tracking and sharing some of that in the energy protocol so that we know that the game plan's working because of what we track.

The key thing is no two bodies are the same. So then when you ask anyone a question, you'll find that, you know, two people ask the same question and you'll get two different answers. It's just, it's really finding out what works for that individual. And that's the key that I find when I consult with people generally, you try and build a bit of, a, bit of a dialogue because a lot of people are answering the same question as far as what their needs and what their wants are. As a professional, when I've worked with people one on one for such a long time, everyone's constantly saying or kind of when I'm asking them what their needs are, they're telling, I need three kilos of weight loss, I need to improve, you know, the lower back, my lower back because I've got an injury, et cetera, et cetera. But really, when it comes down to it, they're just kind of the superficial things. Once we start to peel the top layer, the second layer off, and we get to the crux of the matter is I'm going in from a physical point of view and I'm going in from a chemical point of view with nutrition and exercise. But in reality, the base of this whole discussion hasn't been that at all. It's just because they've got some emotional hang up earlier on in life, generally, in most cases. And I'll find, you know, like the key here is, is that we're digging and digging and digging to really find out what the root cause of, of why they want the change in their life. And, and I know when I work for a big corporation, the first and foremost thing we'll go on after was the underlying motivational reason why someone wanted to make the change. But people aren't always willing to share because you need to build a relationship, earn someone's respect before they kind of allow you into a little bit more depth into their own personal life and what's going on in their life. And that's why it's really exciting with what we do, because we've got so many expert coaches that we do start to, you know, get to know, get to know the person first. And there's no way in hell that I'm ever going to find out anything about anyone, what makes them tick, what they enjoy, what struggles that have had in life by just going in and trying to find out, you know, hey, listen, this is the best exercise for you. This is the best nutrition plan for you. Because that's never going to happen. Because really that's only the most superficial thing. Really, in all honesty, what we're always doing is searching for that one big kind of underlying issue, that emotional issue. And so that's why again, I reflect back to what, you know, what we're doing here now, guys, and why kind of we're experts in our field because we're always looking for what really is the underlying problem that anyone has. And it may not just be one problem, but you know what, we have to go one layer at a time. It's the onion theory. We peel one layer off and then hopefully we build a little bit more trust and confidence in someone to then allow us to the next layer, to the next layer. You know, we close a few doors and we open a few more. And that's what it's really about, building the trust, the relationship. And then just really at the end of the day, you don't stop at that superficial stuff. And that's where most people will go. You know what, it's just maybe 5 or 10 kilos. But in reality it's not that this is really bounded by some kind of emotional attachment that they've had a really bad experience in earlier in life. And that's what we're going after. And that stuff doesn't take for me, you know, half an hour, an hour to write some program down, you know, in a journal or on a piece of paper, or giving you access to some really basic nutrition plan and things like that. Yeah, that's part of the whole process. But in reality, what we're really going after is define what makes you tick, what you enjoy. I'm trying to get a conversation out of you where I've known you for 30, 40 years, I've played football, basketball, netball, water polo, whatever it is, and I want to be sitting down with you at the pub, having a beer with you and really sharing some good hard family life stories and really finding out what makes you tick. And once we get to that, that depth, then that's when we're going to find out really how we can implement the right strategy to get the best result for you. So that's why me giving you an exercise program is only going to be a very superficial thing. Me giving you a nutrition program is only going to be a very superficial thing. This is where we have to go in 3 months, 6 months, 9 months, 12 months, and then only then, once we've built that relationship and everything else within that 12 month period, then we start to get to know each other and that this is for about long, this is a life changing journey. This is not about a quick fix and this will never be about a quick fix. And if you think it is, you're doing all the wrong things. And I'm not going to tell you to fuck right off. I'm going to get you to stay on board, but I'm going to get you to stay on board. And that's where with all of us here sitting here now, we know that it does take time and that's, you know, kind of that's where I'd like to leave it. So I don't get to travel.

Alan, I did look at each other just then.

You just feel like you feel it in the air, won't he? Well, that, that, that we don't want you to right off for a reason. That's why we're here, you know, so you don't go and fall apart on your own. Depth is important. Couldn't agree more, Ken. Like you need depth, you need that. Like the key here with what Ken's saying is yes, it must be individual, but we must also dive into the root cause and then find the purpose. So you're moving away from and then towards what it is that you desire in your life. And it's crazy because people will spend thousands and thousands of reps on eating chocolate, scrolling through their phone, fucking TV time, sitting on a couch on superficial things that crush them at the source level or at a deeper level, yet they're not willing to go the other way around and develop the thousands of reps, getting into the layers of who it is they want to be, their identity, to then carve out what that specifically looks like and just from a pure energy point of view and diving deep into the core. How does that turn you around, Adam? When you're looking at peeling the layers back yourself to then define what is it you want. You left a lucrative job to come on board with us. And like, what does that mean for you? Because Ken's talking about people who look at superficial stuff but then diving deeper. How does that then transfer when you started diving deep in yourself in terms of being a dad, work opportunities, career, yourself, your energy levels, your mindset.

Well, I think a lot of the time it's probably a hard question to answer, I guess, but what I probably didn't know the answer to was what? First of all, what I wanted, but what I didn't want and really looking at why am I doing things? Am I doing things because that's just what you do or you know, I had to be really honest with myself. And at the time, yeah, like you said, it was a fairly lucrative job. But am I really enjoying, am I passionate? Am I, you know, I'm earning good money but then I'm looking at my kids who I see for an hour a day and you know, are they getting the best version of me? And I, you know, I'm earning good money, but what does that even mean? You know, I'm spending money to be able to pay for them to go to daycare, an extra day a week so that I don't see them. So it's, it's, it's kind of then going well is this, is this really, you know, in five, ten years time what sort of connection I'm going to have and really being brutally honest. And I guess for a lot of us we actually don't have the skills, the tools to have those conversations. So for me coming in was finding how to learn those skills. That was probably the biggest one. So once I learned that skill, that self reflection, I was able to actually peel the layers back and go, well, what do I want? And a lot of the time we don't get the answer until we actually experiment and try new things. You know, put myself in a position where I'm earning less money but I'm, I'm doing something I'm passionate about and if it works, it works. If it doesn't, so be it. I've learned something and I think that's, that's probably something a lot of, a lot of fathers don't do is they don't put themselves in a position to fail because they play it safe. And for me the real, I guess the turning point and the real decision making thought process was, and I've used this in a lot of different ways is if, if that was my son in 18 years when he's coming to me and said, dad, I've got this opportunity, would I tell him to play it safe or would I tell him to go for it and back himself in? And really obviously for most of us we'd say mate, back yourself in. And well, why, why would I talk poppy myself or reduce, remove that opportunity for myself when I wouldn't for my, my son? So for me that, that, that sort of, I guess hopefully that answers the question. But yeah, that was, that was the thought process. The real, I guess to break it down is we don't know what we don't know and we only ever know it once we've done it.

So taking those opportunities and becoming part of the tribe, what it does or what it did do for you and continues to do is it gives you space and time to analyze that, review that, to find that you're right, man. What do we want? What don't we want? Too often people are caught in the chaos and the whirlwind of life where they don't give themselves the time to actually review their actions and where their life's heading, their trajectory. They just accept it. They think that's it, that's the standard, that's normal. Whether it's their physical health, mental health, their work, their relationships, their marriage. She'll be right. We signed a fucking piece of paper. We're married. Like, what does that even mean? The interesting thing you said then was skill sets and I haven't even thought of this. This is why I love these episodes as well as when we work with the members. Brutally honest was also the term that you used. That is a skill set. Like honesty is a skill set. You guys think it isn't, it fucking is. Why? Because none of us want to naturally face pain. We don't want to. We want to move away from pain. We don't want to recognize pain or hardships or problems. That's where you get the whole turn a blind eye, sweep it on the rug, bury your hand in the sand, all the fucking terms. That's why people don't want to count their macros. I didn't lose any weight this week. Okay, cool. Well, yeah, I ate healthy. Did you? What about those fucking three or six Tim Tams, that's like 700 calories. What about that one, mate? Maybe that's the difference over six weeks, which becomes 4,000 calories, which becomes a kilo, you lose.

Like I love, I love seeing that because we sometimes look at the guys data when they track MyFitnessPal and you can see it. They'll track four days and it's awesome. And then all of a sudden, Friday, Sunday, Sunday, they don't track it at all. And you're like, come on guys. It's really easy to be honest when you're doing things well, but when you fall off that wagon, if you're not honest, just, it's a, it's a wasted day. Where with the tracking you go, okay, well, I might have failed two days out of the seven, but I succeeded five days. But if you don't track those two days, that whole week is useless because you don't have the entire data. So you need to you need to face, and we talk about, lean into the pain and that sort of stuff, but people talk about all that. But when it comes time to do it, we don't want to when it.

Comes time to do it without accountability to anyone else because they can hide and be liars to themselves and no one else will know. Right. Whereas when we've got that, I'm sure kennel diving here from his, from his field of what he's seen, people say one thing, but they're actually doing another thing. And even then, yeah, you might fall off the bandwagon a little bit, but at least if you got the data, you can review and go, wow, I really fucking bombed. Friday, Saturday. How about instead of the entire day writing myself off, I just make sure it's one meal and dessert instead of that, plus fucking eight beers and so on and so forth.

And I think that the beauty of the data is you can then analyze why did I fail. If you know that in that area I failed, you can start looking and go, okay, what was the trigger point? Was it that my missus whipped out? And I'm shocking for this, my missus will whip out a block of chocolate and there's no such thing as a half block chocolate in my fridge. It's, if it's open, it's gone. So the, the trigger point is the chocolate, so it off. I've told my Mrs. She can buy chocolate all she wants but hide it so I can't see it. So for me it's understanding. But if I don't track that and I don't understand it, I cannot analyze it and I cannot change it.

It's the onion theory, isn't it? You build, lay it back. That's the source, that's why I'm doing this. People don't even question the why though. And that's like you said, being brutally honest and everything you just mentioned, it's a skill set. They're skill sets. What are your thoughts on that, Ken?

You can't out train a bad diet. That's it in a nutshell. But nobody really knows what a bad diet is because what they've created in their lifestyle habits, they think that's just the norm. And so just working with a guy yesterday, life, one on one, and he's asking me to give him, can I do an extra 300 sit ups kind of when I don't see you, he comes and sees me three days a week. He said, can I do an extra 300 sit ups on the days I don't Come and see you. I said, yeah, but you're gonna fuck your back up, so what do you want the 300 sit ups for? And he goes well I just can't shift any weight. I said okay then, so let's just start looking at what you've been consuming. Oh no, no, no, my diet's fine. I said well let's go through it then. And so then he goes through one day, two day, three day, four day. Yeah, it's all great. I said what about, is there any alcohol involved? He said, oh yeah, yeah, I don't count that. He said all I had last night was a bottle of wine and two scotches. That's it. I said, what about the night before? He said I just had like, listen, I don't really drink much beer, but I only had two beers and I had my two scotches. So you're having on an average of three to four drinks a night, seven days a week. Oh yeah, but that's, but that's liquid. What? Fuck me. Like, seriously, like, like people just. Honestly, you've just got to be realistic to yourself. It's like me, I'm gonna just, just give you one slap across the face. Yeah, but it's not gonna hurt, it's just gonna be soft. It's okay, don't worry about it. I'm just gonna give you, you know like one, one slab of chocolate at em. Just no, no, no, be fine. You just take two blocks and then we'll have just. Yeah, no shit, I didn't eat the whole slab, I just ate a half a slab. So I'm only gonna put on half as much weight or I'm only gonna lose as half as much weight. Like is the glass half full or half empty? Don't try and look for results when you are not going to be willing to share what you're actually doing. So this is where it just kills me. People are looking to think, fuck, I'll just go and do an extra half an hour exercise a day and that's going to allow me to have two or three alcoholic beverages or it's going to allow me to have this dessert or whatever else. You will never ever out train a bad diet. Write the shit down, have a look at it, take a photo, don't even share it with me because as soon as you start to share it with me, which nine times out of ten you won't because you know you've already fucked up anyway. And so once you're putting it in front of your eyes and you can see it, the proof's in the pudding. So this is where people are looking for all the technical bullshit that they, they think that's going to work. 300 sit ups a day. I've been working on this guy's back for literally more than a year because of his poor health. And then so I've been explaining to him three days a week for more than two years that the last thing you should be doing because of your poor back is sit ups. We should be doing more core strength and things like that, but not sit ups because it's going to completely fuck your back up. So he wants to lose two to three kilos, so he's asking me, he wants to do an extra 3, 6, 9, 1200 sit ups when I've told him time and time again. So it just goes to show, when we're having conversations with anyone, are you really listening? Are you present? So when we're talking about family, self and service and nutrition and exercise and anything else, are you really absorbing this information or do you need me to hold your hand every step of the way? Or you're going to take control of your own life and your own destination? Because if you don't, well, then good luck to what's going to happen down the track. And then when it comes to all these different illnesses and issues and everything else, when you're not taking control, that's the old saying, like we said before, you give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, you teach him how to fish, you know, you feed him for a lifetime. So open your ears up, open your eyes up and listen and take this shit in, because this is valuable information. This is just, it just doesn't get any better than this. So I just don't know where to go with a lot of people when they're just, they're present, but they're not actually listening or absorbing. And that's where the problem lies with most people.

I think it ties in with something you said, a podcast you did a little while ago, about taking things personally. You know, I think a lot of the times the guys don't want to admit that they may not be doing the right thing because it's a reflection upon their identity, not just okay for that period of time. I let it slip. No, if I, if I eat these things and then they and Alan, Ken and Adam know that I did this, I'm a fuck with, because I didn't, I didn't, you know, and we get it all the time. It's like, I feel like I feel like I've let the tribe down through not engaging, from not doing the right thing. It's like, man, you haven't let anyone down. You've just learned something about yourself, you know, so it's not a reflection upon you. It's just a reflection upon your actions. So what are we going to change?

Yeah, it's why we have such a good sweet spot, really. I mean, for the guys, ken gives us 80 to 85% adherence. That made. That's a lot like, that means you've got 10 to 15%. So if you were essentially 95% strict or disciplined or, you know, committed to a regime that's designed for you, that means on the weekends, yeah, you can peel it back to 70% and the averages would still say the problem is, guys drop to fucking zero percent. They don't track anything, they do anything, and they blow themselves out of the water. It completely undoes the work. But you're right, man. Like, it's not the identity, they're just choices. The hard part is, though, when you're in a deathbed, when you look at the series of choices and actions you've made, then you can reflect and go, this was my absolute identity because these were the actions I chose to consistently do. So if you fuck up one day, one week, one meal, one training session, so be it. That doesn't have to define you. Like. Like Adam was saying that you don't have to take it personally or hide with. With your ego and suppress or pull it away. But it's crazy. The human mind, man. Just what you're saying, Ken, like how people justify to themselves, you know, like what you said, out training a poor diet. Like people. It's not even that people aren't willing to pay the price. It's. They'll go and overindulge and give into pleasures, but then they try and pay with Monopoly money, thinking that'll. That'll even out. It can't. It doesn't. Doesn't make any sense. It does. Does not compute. And I learned that trying to be an elite athlete, or being an elite athlete, but trying to sometimes cheat the system by not counting my nutrition because I was too busy. So I just made sure I got a shitload of protein. That was it. It's like, I look back now, man, there were heaps of times I was not giving myself middle of summer training in the shed. I should have had way more carbohydrates to fuel my body. Wonder why I was breaking down and cramping and feeling lethargic fatigued, burning out. You know, the mindset was there, the mentality was there, but who knows where I could have been if I actually did it properly.

The biggest game changer I see with people is definitely the nutrition. There's no two ways about it. And we all have grass fires and we're constantly putting out these grass fires. And the great thing about these grass fires, that if you put these grass fires out with no shoes on, you don't really, you don't really burn yourself because you're just putting out these little fires and you're keeping them at bay. But where the problem lies is we get through Monday to Thursday or Monday to Friday, and then those little grass fires and now become a raging inferno because you completely drop the guard, you drop your ball and you think, well, this is just my norm, this is my habit, this is what I do. You've got to be very, very kind of proactive and think to yourself, okay, let's just aim for that weekend that I can stay on track. Let's just get through. I can get through Monday to Friday because that's what most people can do. But then that Friday to Sunday evening, that's where we've got to stop that raging inferno. And then it becomes just continuous and like, this is where we've got to put those fires out before they become something that we cannot physically put out ourselves. And this is why this bad habit comes from one week to four weeks to eight weeks to 12 weeks. And then all of a sudden we've got these underlying systemic health issues that is no longer a grass fire because of you've had diarrhea, bloating of the stomach, poor gut health, bad choices, whatever else, it's become this raging inferno that really, it hasn't created so many symptoms on the outside or so much on the inside that we've been able to notice that it's been a problem because it's something that we've put up with for 1, 3, 5 years of our life. And then because of the body's taken such a big whack or the impact on the body that no longer that short term stress with those little grass fires, or that medium term stress where we're doing a tap dance or, you know, we're in the African jungle trying to put out, you know, 25 grass fires. Now this is the raging inferno where we've got to the stage now where it's been one, three, five years, and then all of a sudden we're presenting with some kind of terminal illness. And we go, shit. But like Monday to Friday I was eating well, but on the weekends I just couldn't put those fires out. So this isn't an overnight thing. This is something that is a lifestyle change. This is why where we go back to, it's not about what you're doing a day, a week or a month or a year. It's about what we're doing to change for the better, for the longevity. That's what it's all about. So that's why whenever you're looking on your day to day things, your daily action plan, your weekly action plan, how can you change that from one day to the next or from one week to the next and get the wins on the board so you get through that weekend so that you're not having to try and call the fire brigade or anyone else for that matter to help you put out these great raging fires. So that's really important that we recognize that. And the key, and honestly the challenge for anyone out there, if you've had however many weekends where you do drop the ball, the challenge is get over one weekend and get through, not your five, plus your two days of the weekend, get through potentially your five year two, and then another five days and have a look how much change you can actually create within your own personal space and not only from your nutrition or your exercise, but also with spending time with family and the kids and everything else. And that's, that's kind of the challenge I put to everyone. See how far you can get. And we start with a week and then we turn it into a fortnight and then just let the ball roll from there.

It's amazing. I mean, I don't know about you guys, but the amount of conversations I have with people that are big drinkers and that sort of stuff in the weekends they blow out, but then they do the one weekend where they, they don't drink and they go, I haven't seen the sunrise on a Sunday for fucking 10 years. And they go, how good was this? I woke up, I spent time with the kids and it's like, exactly. You know, then they go, oh, I'll probably do that next week. And then all of a sudden they don't drink on the weekend, but they don't know. And this is what we sort of said mentioned earlier, you don't know until you've done it. So, you know, and the amount of conversations I have with people externally to RDM and hpf, but no, I could never do that. You know that that's my Blowout. And then you go, but just try it. But they're not willing to try it. That's what frustrates me. Is it? You can, you can make a judgment on something that won't work for me. And then the next question I ask every time is when have you tried it? And they go, no, I just know it won't work. Well, until you try it. You can basically, in Ken's words, you can right off, but that's it. So you cannot know if something works or doesn't work until you put it in place and then measure it.

Yeah, of course it won't work, man. We get a monstrous amount of people reaching out every week about what we do in our program or not. And some guys will look through or they'll watch a video watching that and say, oh, you look so looks good. But it's not for me. I'm like, well of course it's not, mate. And it throws a lot of them by me reaffirming and being so direct and blunt in, in the story they tell themselves. And sometimes when they sort of get a bit taken back or ask why, I'm like, well of course it's not going to work for you. I haven't even looked into it or tried it or seen exactly how to apply. Same when people throw stones at what we do on some of our ads. It's like, I can't take it personally. He's got no idea who I am or what we do. To hell would he even know he's. His words have no weighting at all. Like a. It's delusion, it's fantasy, it's a feeling. But you're right, it's like a lot of people, they just don't know. And this is the thing, a lot of you guys, you may not know the strategies, tactics, what we talk about, the way to put yourself in the right mindset and then a lot of stuff you do know. The gift of what we provide here is we're just bringing to the surface what you should be focusing on so you can say yes to the right things and say no to the wrong things. And I'll tell you what, like nutrition, an ever moving beast for a lot of people, especially as men, fathers, different ages of the kids, the family dynamics, all that sort of stuff your work demands. Yes, there's a lot of variables, but ultimately your nutrition can be one of the easiest wins ever. Here's something in front of me. Pick it up. Put it in my fucking mouth. Let's look at this 21 meals a week. Let's say three meals. Three meals a day, main meals. So 21 meals a week. You do your meal prep fucking straight away. That's. Let's say you want to hit a reasonable percent, 85 to 90%. So let's get 17 to 18 of those meals. They're really solid. Fantastic. Do one meal prep for an hour. Fucking bang. There's eight, nine meals. You've cut that in half. Half your victories. It's already done. Talk to your wife. Hey, what should we have for dinner? Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday? Like, it's not monotonous or structured or boring in a sense that there's no value. We love that. We fucking love food. I don't know about you guys. I love food. It's like, well, hey, Krim, what are we gonna do? What are we gonna do? Mexican. Because Mexican you can do really well and really healthily. It's crazy, the flavors. We're gonna do it Tuesday night. We're gonna do this Wednesday. We've got a short little whiteboard. Write it down. There's five meals straight away. That means you've only got to really dial in, what, six meals out of the week, which could be your breakfast. And if you got that shit sorted with a good morning routine, came over. We saw a board. Krin showed me an art board because they're looking at getting some sort of appreciation slash achievement slash reward board for the kids. I don't want to do. Do this. You get that? I don't want to be that regimented, but I want to bring in some sort of thing to look for where the kids will be on there. But we will as well, Corinne and I. And she's showing me one. And one of the art boards was in the kitchen. And this art board, it had the days of the week with the meals. Monday was pasta. Tuesday was. It said chicken nuggets, chicken packets, chicken packs or something like, you know, it's like. Like the pastry. I can't remember what it's called. And then the next one was spaghetti Bolognese. The next one was just. It just said fried rice. And I looked at this, I was like, it's pasta three times this week. There's zero protein in this. One of them might have been nuggets and chips. I think that was the Friday. And I looked at it. I was like, holy fuck, man. Even these people, like, even writing it down, it's crazy what they're choosing. It's like they got no fucking idea. They just haven't even educated Themselves to a degree. So even people, when they plan stuff, at least they plan it. But when you look at that, these guys, it's like when I say these guys, guys like yourself who may be listening to this, you haven't even planned what you're going to be doing. How the fuck do you think you can have any success when your willpower is lowered? You're tired, you're more fatigued, your choices become narrowed because you're driving home. There's the servo, there's McDonald's. All of a sudden, your world narrows in and you're just in a channel where your willpower is down and you just accept. And then that's a standard on yourself and who you are.

Try to go to a restaurant and see what you can order. For kids. Go to a restaurant and see what's on the menu list and see where the options are. And not only for that, go to a restaurant and see how many comes with chips on whatever you order and just say you don't want chips with that. And they look at you like you got two heads. It's like, no, can you please leave the chips off the plate? Thanks. Just like, shit. I don't know if the chef will do that. Just like, well, guess what? The chef can fuck right off. Well, yeah, you're right, though.

There is a chance, because I make. My two oldest boys are autistic, so their options of what they'll actually eat is severely limited. So to be able to manage all that and, you know, and we don't do it well all the time, but, you know, just to try to go, okay, this is the stuff you need to be eating. And it's a constant battle. So then it becomes that. But that's all part of it, isn't it? You go, okay, well, this is the challenge. The roadblock, whatever it may be, is what is the path forward. Everyone's different. But until you analyze and understand why, you know, there's this certain basics that apply to everyone. But then we go, okay, well, how are we going to apply this into my dynamic? And that's really important as well, because that's the next step. These are all the fundamentals of what we need to be doing. And then, okay, then the next step is always, how am I going to apply this to me? Because what works for Al, works for Ken, does not work for me, so it's really, really important. And then again, it goes back to tracking, goes back to asking why all those questions that, again, peel the layer back on the onion to work out for my core, for my family, what works, you know.

And I'm going to ask you guys in a second, but on that note, I just want you guys to have a think about this, list to this and ask yourself, what does mastery mean to you? And I'll ask you guys in a second as well what it means to you. And we obviously going to run through now in the next few minutes, we're going to run through the tracking what we do so you can get an idea around the psychology of how you should apply it as a man. Because it's not just, hey, just do this, here's a fucking sheet of nutrition, here's your macros. It's way more than that. Like Ken said, that is the byproduct of what's going to connect to you. But I want you to ask yourself that question. What does mastery mean to you? And do you want it whether you're 60, 80, on your deathbed, who you affect in your household, the stability for your children? To me, mastery, not to just make it a word porn of all these different things, but to me, mastery is performance and achievement with a high level of control which equals more freedom in your life. I've mastered something which means mastery. You can't say when I say performance, it's not higher level performance if you master something you fucking mastered. So that is performance to the T where it's equal achievement and control over that specific area of your life. So mastery is a man, Mastery as a husband with your relationships, mastery as a business owner or worker. Mastery is an athlete. All of our dads are on the inside. They are all athletes. That is the mindset. You're a fucking athlete. You're not. You're not someone who hears just a thing, off you go. You have that mindset of being an athlete. Who wouldn't want mastery? You hear that whole thing, you got to do 10,000 reps, blah, blah, blah, cool, that's great for sports. How come you're not applying that to your life? That's what mastery is to me. But I'm curious. I mean, Ken, you've achieved some amazing things in your life and you continue to do so, but what does mastery mean to you, mate?

I suppose really it comes down to making sure that you've got a plan in place and you're actually following it and you've got to follow the plan. So my exercise, my physical well being, I know I have a minimum standard and that's a six day a week for me. And I know I've got A, that's for me to be able to master movement, to be able to master exercise, to be able to master all aspects. Whenever it comes to that, I know when it comes to my nutrition 9010 rule, for me, that's where I find that's where the master is. There's still room for flexibility. And as we step into that, then where else do I need to kind of be learning? It's got to be. I'm constantly upskilling. So there's always a minimum of seven hours a week of upskilling. I never, ever can get enough information. Like the day you stop learning as the day you no longer become a master at anything. You have to be continuously learning and upskilling at everything you do. Physical, emotional, chemical. I'm constantly, always learning. And that's where the mastery comes from, because no one has all the answers. The nutrition is so young. Exercise. Yeah, we believe we have a pretty good grasp on most things, but we're forever exploring. And then when it comes to the emotional side of stuff, we're forever looking for better ways to deal with day to day stresses and everything else. So mastery to me is, it's always a learning process and just trying to be a little bit better today than I was yesterday. That's, that's how I kind of put my mastery in place.

Yeah, I love it.

That's tough act to follow, Ken. I guess for me, mastery is the outcome. So when we talk about the outcome, that's great, that's the goal. But if we focus on that without doing the work, we're getting nowhere. So for me, it's, it's okay. What is, what is the goal? What is the myth? What is the most important thing that I'm aiming for, which in this case is mastery? All right, what's the process? Like Ken said, what do I need to keep doing? Where do I need to upskill? And for me, it's just turning up in the right way consistently because we know this is something on the inside we focus on. We don't necessarily focus on the outcome. We don't focus on the mastery. We focus on what is the process. How often did I turn up? Did I turn up in the right way? All those things, all those questions we need to answer to get us to that point, because it may be a 10 year goal, it may be a one year goal, whatever that mastery is. How, how do I need to turn up? You know, physical is a little bit easier to track. Mental connection, you know, emotional, all those sort of things. The intangible you know, we want to master ourselves. Well, there's probably a million different ways we can do that. So how am I going to turn up today to work closer to that goal? That for me, that's, that's my real sort of, I guess, mindset around mastery.

Yeah. Love it. Awesome. Continuously learning, playing the percentages, really alignment with lead and lag measures. What are the outcomes? What am I doing to get there six days a week? And the word that kept coming out to me when both of you were exploring and sharing, that was consistency. Absolutely, man. Continuously learning and consistency. How do we know if we are mastering something? This is where we dive into and look at something that essentially takes our guys six to seven minutes a week. That's it. But it gives us everything we need. Just like our force method, feelings, outcomes, roadblocks, commitments and evolution. Everything is ignited with that little spark. Sometimes it's deep, sometimes it's peeling the onion layer back. One, maybe two, maybe three. But there's always got to be some sort of emotional driver. That's why feelings are first in our big goal setting called the force method. But what we do when we start is we get guys into state. So the start of our check ins with our guys, it is subjective. What are your greatest wins for the week? What's something you feel blessed or grateful for? So instead of focusing on the shit like most of us do because it's wired into our survival mechanism of either fight or flight or just protecting ourselves, have a look at what the great things were for the week. You fucked up 10 times. Cool. What was the one great thing though? So we get guys into a state right away. Let's elevate and get into state to start reflecting on the good that you've done in the week, the great that you've done in the week. Okay, well, now start to rate yourself. How do you rate yourself and how you went in family, in self and in service, those three key areas that make the man's life. And then after, and then obviously rating your communication, Are you bringing clarity and context? So is it clear how you're connecting with people? And is there a fucking point in how you connect to your wife, your children and are you actually connecting with them and being present? When you get clear on those scores, all of a sudden it's asking the question, okay, well, looking back over your journey so far, how are you feeling? How are those feelings? That way for us as coaches, we can see where the mind is of the man, where the feelings are and the heart is of the man. But then we can start to dial in and go, okay, let's start moving forward with some more objective data and the facts. And that's when we move into essentially our habits, our energy protocol, and our connection piece and protocol with the habits family, self and service. What was your habit for the month? Did you execute on scoring yourself on that in family, self and service, what do you see is one of the biggest turnarounds? Ken, when we look, because I look at this, I'm like, fuck, man. Even if these people hit a 50% ratio to add something in, you got to take something away. So essentially, when we're building six good habits, so if they're a 50% ratio, you build a habit a month over the year and half of them you stick with. So you get six in each section. That means over 12 months, you've brought in 18 new habits that are serving you, moving you forward. One, because you're not alone. You've got the guidance and coaching to direct the value of it. And two, because you've got that continual accountability. But secondly, you've actually pulled away 18. Like, what would you see as that being a benefit for the man in family, self and service, bringing 18 new habits into the year, or even to take that away, bringing six new habits in and taking six away?

I suppose this really comes down to the habits that have been created and now for a lifetime. Like, it's really about changing your physiology. It's about changing every process within your body and being able to get those very small wins on the board. But those wins, when you do implement those, you've got to understand that how do you feel emotionally when you implement these habits? Because without that emotional attachment, to be able to keep that sustained and to be a lifestyle commitment with those new habits, how do you feel with implementing those habits? And really, at the end of the day, as you implement something, there's something got to be taken away and vice versa. And the whole idea is that you've got to be feeling better within yourself and it's got to be benefiting not only yourself, but the people around you. And what I find a lot of times when people are going through kind of working out what habits they can implement, whatever else are they actually present when they create those habits, rather than just like what you're saying ads before is that you can show up, but really if you're not present and there's no emotional attachment, well, then how long are they going to stick for? I know we talk about that. And when you look back on them, 1 3, 6 months, 12 months later. What was the purpose of implementing that habit? How do you feel about it? How's it changed your life? And that's what's important to me. If you're going to implement something, what impact is that going to have on your life and the people around you?

I think too, it then builds your self belief. You know, we get a lot of fathers come in that are quite, quite vulnerable and they've probably never done this for themselves. So that first small little habit you implement, okay, I'm gonna cut back on drinking one day, this one day a week for the next month. Awesome. I've achieved that. So I've got that little, little building block. Next month I can build a little bit more. I'm gonna cut back my smoking, you know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna cut back the drinking to only on weekends. And then all of a sudden in two years time, they don't drink, they don't smoke. I'm gonna start going for park run on a Saturday morning. If you'd asked them two or three years ago, you know, what would it take to get you to run 5Ks every Saturday morning, they'd go, they tell you fuck off, it's not gonna happen. But over time, building that belief, building those small little habits in that compound, over time it just creates a whole new identity for these guys. And I think that's really, really powerful. Not just the, the tangible result of, you know, eating better, drinking less, all that sort of stuff for your physical health, awesome. But emotionally, just to learn that I can actually achieve this, I've got the belief that, you know, and all of a sudden these opportunities we talked about earlier, the opportunities open up because we believe ourselves, the ceiling that we've created for ourself is gone. It's like, fuck, what can I run my own business? Why can't I take on that project that, you know, might earn me a million dollars five years ago that just never would have been a possibility.

Yeah, it's, it's what you're saying earlier. Completely agree, man, what you're saying earlier, Ken, along your journey, some doors you're going to have to close. You think that you're paying the price. You have no fucking idea what the price is. You're paying way more than you should. Right? And then you want to get in a bit of discomfort and create new habits and things that are going to benefit you and your family and you call it a sacrifice. I mean, you're fucking kidding, aren't you? Sacrifice to what? The Better version of you, what you're sacrificing is the shit version you've maintained for so long so you can actually fucking level up and upgrade yourself into a better human being. So it's not a sacrifice at all. Problem is, people are paying the wrong price or way too much. They don't even realize. Like you said threes ago. No, I'd never fucking run that. No way. It is a belief system and like Ken said, there's some doors you will need to close, but then there's going to be other doors that open. And when these doors open, you'll start to see things you couldn't possibly see before. And these opportunities then breed and breathe into your reality, which is, that is right. It is your belief system. It is your identity, who you are. And like both you and Ken said, Adam, the feelings, yeah, there's got to be an emotional driver. But then once you've created a set of facts, you've got to then review the emotional attachment again because that's what reinforces it. And then, you know, it's true. True feelings follow the facts because the facts are there. It's done, it's history, it's set there, you know, and when we're looking at habits, it really is a case of don't fucking sit down on New Year's Eve and say, this is what I'm going to cut it. That's not a habit, that's a desperate fucking plunge or a last minute pluck to try and grab something that's going to give you a level of self esteem, motivation or gratification. Two weeks into January and then shit just falls apart. You got to peel the layers back. It must mean something. It must be built in step by step. Like Adam's saying, it's really that domino effect where you're building this momentum to the point where if you asked me five years ago, Al, you reckon you'd be 160 odd podcast episodes in with nearly 50,000 downloads with men all over the country. I'd be like, I don't even know what that looks like. I'm just an elite athlete and I love training people in my gym and I run little programs for dads in the local community and that's it. Crazy, man. But you wouldn't see that if you don't take those steps, you know, it's incredible. That's why it's important. Again, we get you into state first. Let's get some subjective data. All right, cool. What are the habits? What do they look like? For me, the habit for last month was no technology. That was the family one. I don't want my son, even if he can't speak, to see a fade in my hand because he's conditioned to believe that that's something he should have at an early age. He doesn't know that, you know, he's his age and I'm my age. He just sees what I've got and he wants it. Just like when I'm in the gym now, he picks up little weights and throws them and it's pretty co my technique's better actually. Probably they'd argue that, yeah, his technique's better. He's got a full functioning knee. His squat depth, isn't it crazy? Their squats, they just sit there forever. And I'm like, fuck. It's just mate kids, they're so pure and you know, partially life gets in the way, but the other part is are we leading them or we fucking them up by not providing the right things to focus on? But yeah, the habits and that was great. I executed wasn't perfect, but I hit above 85% on that. Our 80 to 85% on that consistently. The one for myself was training volume, which I'm doing with you cam, which is going well, I'm feeling great. Shape is changing. And the one for services daily content, which we hit and then it just keeps you focusing on, okay, what's my most important thing with this month? If nothing else mattered, what's the one thing I can do that's going to provide impact in my life and those around me? Done. But then we move that into specifics. Let's get really clear on some of the facts. So energy tracking, your mizone, alcohol free days, your nutrition adherence, your sleep scores, your readiness, stress. Cause like, what are you seeing as the value of that, Ken? Because this is your area that you just dominate when now we're tracking MEPs, my zone. What they're actually accumulating their training regime, our HPF app and these different markers we now have to show they're not drinking alcohol or not this many times. And like, what does that become for these guys, mate? By getting clear factual data on how they've traveled.

As we look at the data, the proof's in the pudding. And so when I look at it and talk to the guys and I'm looking kind of on average when we talk about the 8020 rule, it's almost in reverse when the first conversation is had, it's almost like 20% of the time they're doing what they're doing. And 80% of the time they're doing shit stuff or not the right stuff. So the whole idea is to get the better numbers on the board to completely flip that around. And I'm just after that 8020 rule, just to at least see that they're moving in that right direction. The 8020 rule is what we're striving to get to. And then once you step beyond that 8020 rule, that's when we might have an opportunity where it's one week, one month, whatever, that's where we'll bring in these little challenges. And then when the 8020 becomes a lifestyle change, then we can start to bring the 8020 rule into a 9010 rule and then that becomes lifestyle. And just those little 1 percenters, that's where, no matter what and who we're dealing with, we need to kind of look at the percentages from what we track now to see what percentage they are at, whether it's 20, 80 or 50, 50 or 60, 40 or 80, 20. And then what we're going to do is look for the biggest kind of problem within any one of those mechanisms. And we're going after that. Yeah, all of those mechanisms are going to cause some kind of physical or emotional pain. No matter what it is, it's going to cause stress and we need to go after the biggest stresses and that's how we go after it. And then once we get the biggest stress under control, then it may go from 50, 50 to then 80 20. That's how quick we can make those changes. But I mean, you know, we're there to lead you to the water, but we can't make you drink, we can only give you the tools. But we're there to educate you, we're there to hold your hand, we're there to guide you through everything with all the coaches and all the expertise that we have. But at the end of the day, we're there to give you the guidance. But unless you actually implement it, then we have no control over that.

I think too, when we implemented this new Wheatley Temple especially, we talked about standards. So when it was very subjective, you could have a guy that would drink three or four days a week and yet still score in the 80s or 90s, because for him, that level of standard was, this is what I do. So if I nail this, I'm still at 80%, where if I have a little bit more this week, I might be at 70%. Well, we've now created a paradigm where it's like, no, no, you have to do everything perfectly to get 100%. Even the coaches, we don't hit 100% every week because we live in the real world, you know, that's okay. But we have to set the highest possible standard to say that probably Ken's probably the only one that consistently hits 100%.

Ken gets 105 sometimes.

That's crazy. But that's the thing. It's like, okay, in a perfect world, if all the stars are aligned and everything went exactly the way it should go, that's the point that I hit 100%. Anything else is context. Because if I'm not tracking my sleep, I'm not tracking my readiness, and I'm not tracking my workouts through my, my zone, I can only ever score 50%. And that's okay to a point as long as I'm tracking myself against that every week. So if next week I score 55%, awesome. But as soon as I hit the highest possible, which might be 60 or 70%, the highest possible score that I can get without tracking those things, I have to start looking at those because my life, I'll never get the result I want unless I do that. And we have conversations with some of the guys on the inside about tracking and all that sort of stuff. And I say to them, it's like, again, do the fundamentals right first. But at a certain point, you are going to want, you're going to need to track this stuff if you want to get to that to be a true high performance father. Because if we don't know, you'll never get to where you need to be.

Yeah, yeah. It's rewiring slowly. Like Ken said, let's work and leverage the percentages or the ratios in your favor of time. And then like Adam said, what does that look like for you to really hit the mark for your journey? And I'll tell you right now, if you hit not because of the metrics and what we track, that is a high performance phone. It's not you're fucking millions of dollars or you got a six pack or, you know, you spend time with the family all day, every day because you, I don't know, you, you're unemployed or you just, you don't do anything cool. What about all the areas that, that make the man? And when I say all, there's only three different types of significance. How you're turning up as a member of community, society with your work or business and providing value there, that service. And then for yourself, who you are inside of yourself as a man and Then who you are as a family man, including relationships with your wife and your children or your partner, that inner circle. And, you know, I'll tell you right now with the metrics and what we track, if you factually hit. Because I'll never hit 100% with this data, if you factually hit 90%, you will feel like 100%.

Yeah.

And that's the thing. It's like you don't need to try and get robotic in the number and yelling, hey, I'm just ticking a box here. I've got if I. I know because like you said last week, I was 82%. Anything above 85, 85 and above is blue ribbon. We call them blue ribbon winners. That's big, man. Because of the different metrics, which is faster track, but there are probably 13 to 17, I'd say, different metrics. So, yeah, it's hard. This is life. But when I Look at that 82%, the difference between me being in the green zone and being a blue ribbon, which was 3%, was I only created space three times. So there were four days of the week I didn't take time out for myself. And I think I had honey and handsome time. I spent time with Karin once in the week. Beautiful. So for me to get up to 90%, all I need to do is do two or three more fucking walks or read my book a couple of times more. Create space five times. We love to have seven, but that was a tough week. But create space a few extra times. Organize maybe a brunch or morning tea with Corinne when she drops the kids off at school, and change my day a little bit and then do the exact same fucking thing. And I'm at 87 to 90%. That's it. Like, that is how simple it can be. Doesn't start that way. But like what Ken's talking about, you're dialing in the habits, the routines, you're peeling back the emotion to attach. You're getting a logical pathway. Like Adam said, you're building step by step. All of a sudden it's all part of you. I don't need to be disciplined to train. It's part of who I am. I don't need discipline and self control. It's always layered into your life. But when things become your morning routine, it's exactly that. It's routine.

And I guess the next part is too for you, Al, if you fill it out this week, next week, the week after, and creating space is continuing issue, that then makes it very, very clear that here's the area I need to focus on because we know life gets in the way. At the moment, my young bloke is having some anxiety issues, so he's not sleeping well. So straight away my sleep scores are going to be low. That's okay because I know the reason I'm doing what I can do about it. So I'm still doing my night routine, all that sort of stuff, but I'm getting woken up. That's okay, because we're going through the path of, okay, well, what do we need to do to support correct this specific thing that's causing me not to sleep well? And then on the flip side, what can I do around my daily. Do I need to have naps every now and again to boost myself up? So I'm analyzing, why is this? So what can I do about it? I'm getting back control because it's very easy. We can sit there and go, I'm not creating space for myself eight weeks in a row, but if I do nothing about it, where am I going? So it's really, it just really informs what our, our new myths are, what our answers are, what our actions are. We need to analyze it. We can go, okay, cool, now what's the way forward?

The big thing that I find and just not the weekend gone, but the one before I went to Tumbarumba and to a nursing home for my wife's nan. And it's interesting because you're in a country town and pretty much you go into a nursing home in a country town and everyone knows each other. And there's kind of a couple of ways you can look at this. You go into a nursing home and that's basically where you go to die. Or there's another way you can go in. You can go in because you've got no support around you and you lost your loved ones and everything else. And Lisa's nan, my wife, she's 93, 94 years old. And the nurses and all the staff in there love her because she's like the most liveliest person in there. She's lived on the land her whole life. She's been on the farm for literally 90 plus years. And there she is. And the nurses love her and all the staff because they don't have to do anything for her. They're not getting her out of bed, sitting her in front of a window and just counting the hours past, making sure that she has a bit of food, sits in a chair for six or eight hours and then puts her back in the bed in the afternoon and just waiting till that bed becomes available for the next person to roll in that nursing home. Now the reason why I've basically spoken about that, telling you now with people's current lifestyle, when I deal with people on a day to day basis, if you're not striving to hit this 80, 20, you are going to be another number that when you get to such an age as the end of your 60s, not 70s or 80s, you will be that person in that bed where they're going to get an A frame to get you out of that bed, sit you in front of a window. They're going to have to feed you themselves, they're going to have to wipe your own ass or you're not going to wipe it, they're going to have to wipe it. That is no life to live. In the last part of your years of your life, the average male lives and what the statistics say, 82.7 years. Now I can guarantee when I looked in that nursing home, I reckon the average lifespan to me in there was 70. So let's put a bit of perspective on things. If you're not striving to hit that 80, 20 now, you're going to be that statistic, I promise you now. So when you talk about the hours that are left in your life out and we talk about how many hours we've got, you know what, if you're not hitting 80, 20 or you're not at least striving to hit that 80, 20, you might as well calculate your life, the rest of your life at the age of 70, because that's what I see and that's exactly how simple it is and that's what it needs to be like. So think about it. I'm sure you've got the numbers on how you calculate it out, but think about it now, you're not going to hit that 80 percentage. Well then, yeah, you might as well put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye from the age of 70.

That's a new one.

At least they'd be flexible, they have good mobility. So true though. This is what I don't get about retirement. I get it. Some people may use it with different contexts, but for me a retirement which becomes a lessening of the mind is turning everything into mush. What I'd rather be is somewhat wealthy in the sense where there may be financial freedom, there may be other freedoms that gives you leverage to do what you want. But I'm never going to retire or stop. So even the age of 70 I look back and I'm like, man, I reckon some people were probably 60 or just before they retire or getting a pension or get access to their super. Their brains already turned into fucking mush. So they're dead, they just haven't been buried. And think about that now. If you're a man listening to this and you're 46 years of age, you're 46, right here and now I want you to think, if you use only half of what you've already used, bang, you're nearly 70, you're 69 years of age. So if you're a 40 year old listening to this, use half of what you've already used, you've already used it, just take half of that, bang, you're 60. How far off are you? Not far off at all. Right?

Yep.

And like Adam's saying that we all have mess and life gets in the way and there's challenges and hardships, but sometimes the relief, because you want to talk about mastery here, this is what this is about. How do we know that we're mastering it? We need to measure it and you need to measure it. So sometimes the measurement alone can bring solace in the fact that, or even relief that this too shall pass. Of course, Adam's working on the young bloke to help him and doing what he can, what he can control, but just the relief in itself in knowing that sometimes when you're in the pit or in the grind of life, when you're tracking, you're maintaining level of focus. This time will pass, it will change, it will get better. Similar to myself with the sleep scores not up in the 90s, continuous work and effort, but knowing it's there and then focusing on other things I can do to compliment and uphold it is just as much the win. That's how you master it, by measure it. Because by measuring. Because when we're measuring it, we can then track, like I said. These are the guys scores, are they a blue ribbon? Are they green? Obviously most of the guys who come to us, they're in the red and the orange. That's why they've come to us. So when I see that and I see the tribe score again, the psychology is a man, you're part of the tribe. Don't let the tribe down, build yourself up. So our total team score is higher, it doesn't bother me if our team scores 62% or 68% or 75% or, you know, the old metrics we're using, we were between 76 and 83%, that's great. But with the new metrics and what we do, it's so much more truer and it's fantastic because we've got a lot of new members who've come on board and we've got such a better way to analyze and get the right scoring and metrics that's connected to the man's life. It's not just robotic. It's great because I know everyone getting a score of 60, which includes the median or the average of a lot of new guys coming in who are in the red and orange zones, is so much more truer than subjectively going, oh, yeah, I'm 100% this week. I'm 100%.

Great.

Well, what's your 100% look like you've done? Fucking. What has changed? Show me. And then it becomes an area of grace. Same with this part when we're talking about, you know, the final piece that we pull together, which is connection. How many days a week are you sitting down and having a meal with your family? Some of you guys, your kids might be grown up. No worries. That's cool. What does your family look like? Family dynamic changes from man to man. How many times are you spending quality time present with the kids and if the kids are moved out of home or whatnot, are you FaceTiming? Are you writing them a letter? Fuck, write them a letter and mail it. Putting some time and effort into some degree where you're connecting with your children. Maybe it's spending time, maybe it's connecting with them, doing something with them for them, whether they're close, whether they're distant in terms of location, what did you do to connect with them? When we talk about Honey and handsome time, how many times this week? And they're all weighted differently. That's why I like what you're talking about. Before, with the alcohol ads, we're never going to tell you to stop drinking alcohol, but the waiting is different. That's a score of zero to seven. Honey and handsome time, zero to three. I mean, if you're spending more than three days a week with your wife, great, you're the top score in that area. But when we're looking at the measurement of what a man needs to juggle and balance in his life, 30 to 60 minutes a couple of times a week is enough with the right quality and effort with your wife to stay connected as individuals, but also as intimate lovers. But then having that then burden release because you know who you are, where you stand in relationship gives you the tools to become Better parents and handle that shit too, instead of feeling neglected and then creating space. So there's a few key things that we run through that almost wraps everything, doesn't it?

Because we've got.

All right, this is our subjective data and putting into the state of how we feel. We're going. This is the facts of our energy. That's the vessel that's living life. How we. Truman, these are the habits. What's habits? And then energy. So this is what we're focusing on. And then this is what I'm connecting to in life. That's what gives you a high performance father score. And when you're measuring that, you know whether you're mastering things or not, to the point where after 12 months, hey, I fucking sat down. One of our members, he was in a podcast a couple weeks ago. I actually haven't sat down with a family for years. We just grab our dinner and sit in front of the tv. And now the dialogue opportunities, the doors that are opening because they're sitting down as a family. These kids are a bit older. They're not, they're not children. They're starting to talk about things that they wouldn't talk about if they're just watching the idiot box. Yeah, that's crazy seeing that it's like that. The question's so simple. Sitting down, present, no technology and having dinner with the family. And here he is, one of our members and lots of our members. Now to the point where when you come on board, okay, cool. In 12 months time, this is how many more times you're going to be able to share great experiences with your wife. This is what you're actually going to be doing with the kids. This is what your score will be. This is the athlete we'll turn you into. So it actually gamifies life as a man, as a father, as a husband to the T where it's, it's so fucking factual. But also it's continuously woven into and layered with the emotions and the feelings that make life and being a high performance father worth it and you being worthy of it, which has the ripple effect to your children.

I think too, it's good because within that metric, within that construct, there's still a lot of flexibility. So for instance, when we talk about having meals with our family, most of us will automatically go to dinner, got to have dinner with the family. But for some guys, that doesn't fit into their, their construct. So for me, when I one of my previous jobs, I was working afternoons, nights consistently. So breakfast was the meal you Know, I got the kids up. And even though my wife. I let my wife sleep in so she could sleep in, I got the kids up, we had breakfast together, we had a bit of a chat. Okay. You know, I set themselves, I set them up for the day. So I took the opportunity where for so many of us, we get caught up because we're not measuring it. We get caught up into, well, I need to have dinner with the family. But if I miss out for whatever reason, I don't look at. Okay, what are the. What are the other options I have? Can we sit down for lunch? Can we have breakfast? Do we have brunch? All that sort of stuff. And the honey handsome side, exactly the same thing. You know, it's not about, you know, most of us. A lot of the time we'll sit down and go, we'll watch a movie together, you know, well, okay, now you're great with this. You know, we'll go to an art class, we'll go do something that's outside the box. But we very rarely think about it because we're just so caught up in the day to day. We don't take a step back and go, what are the actual options? Where when we answer these questions, it's very, very clear. Okay, my wife might work nights, I'll work days. What time do we have together? And I have to force myself to think about it. I have to force myself to find an answer. Because then if I don't answer it or if I don't do the work, I have to be accountable to myself to go. I chose not to do that. It wasn't that I didn't get the opportunity. It wasn't that it didn't present. It's. I chose not to do that. And then I have to be accountable to that. If I'm not spending time with my wife, why am I choosing not to spend time with my wife? You know, that's. That's the answer that we're asking. Really?

Yeah, it's awareness. Awareness is the gateway to all the possibilities, man. But then you got to back it up with actions. And that's what I love about the temple as well. Half of it's just actually having guys going, shit, I didn't even think about that. I didn't even focus on that. You bring that awareness to the surface, then game on, you can shift where you're gonna invest your time and energy with the right focus and then build the right habit and make that part of your life. What do you do with the kids, Ken? Like when we're talking connection with the family and being that family man, like what sort of things hit home for you with maintaining that good connection with the kids and being the family man?

We've had to have a routine right from the get go because obviously we've had no family members to help us out as the kids have grown up. And the routine's always been where, Because I would leave home at 4:30 in the morning, every morning, my wife would have the morning routine and she would plan all that and I would always have the nighttime routine. We would share the cooking and everything else. And now I was always the one to put the kids to bed. And my son MacKenzie at 11 and a half years old, and my daughter Madison, 13 and a half, I'm still putting them to bed, still putting to bed, saying goodnight to them, it's still. That routine has been embedded into their life. And even though my wife misses out on a little bit of cuddle time now because she says they're getting a bit old, but the thing is, I always kind of spend a few minutes putting them to bed, asking them how their day's gone. Like, obviously when we get home we'll have dinner together as a family. I'd say out of a hundred days, we would have 98 days at the kitchen table eating a family meal. That's how it is in our house. That's what it's all about. The big thing that you want to bring a life into this world. My wife said to me, and the most important thing is that you're going to be here for the kids. And we both decided that's what we're going to do. So we've had to make many, many sacrifices and we've missed out on a lot of stuff. But what's that in one kind of sense of thing? Missed out on a lot of stuff? What going out with friends, whatever else, we've stayed home with our family. We've created that incredible environment. We haven't pushed him in front of a device, we haven't palmed him off to anyone else, admittingly. So we had to get him into before and after school care because of our lifestyle and our jobs. But there was always a routine. And now, just only now, within the last or since Covid's kicked in, I've been able to work from home on Tuesdays and Thursdays, which has been an absolute godsend. And now, only now I've been able to drop the kids off. And even though we're like 700 meters away from the School. My wife says to me, why are you dropping the kids off? It's because I can't. Why are you picking the kids up? Because I can. Because literally the first nine years of their life, or, you know, the last nine years or other than Covid, I've never really had that privilege of being able to drop them off or pick them up because that's just our lifestyle. So we've been able to make that work, and that's. That's our routine. We created that space. We turn that routine, and that's what worked for us, and that's where we are today. So I, you know, I tell you what, they. They learned how to sing Old MacDonald had a farm in Italian and every other nursery rhyme and everything else that I sung to them. And they kind of almost forgot about that until only about a month ago and they asked, dad, how come you don't sing us any more songs? Well, those nursery rhymes don't really cut it anymore, and my voice has gone a little bit croaky. But, yeah, no, that's a routine that we have in our house and absolutely love it. And, yeah, that's how we operate.

I love what you said there, too. It's a privilege. So something so simple as dropping the kids off at school and picking them up, it's an absolute privilege. And so often we forget how much of a privilege these things are. I do that with my young bloke when I drop him off. I'll park at the oval next to the school, and I'll walk up. So I'm standing at the gate where my wife, who does most of that, she'll sit in the car in the little pickup bay where most of the parents are. So. But for him, just seeing that look on his face as he's walking out of his school, out of his classroom, looking at me, and just see the grin on his face because I'm there, You know, that for me, that's. That's huge. I love standing there waiting.

Absolutely.

But it's literally a choice to say, am I going to just walk 200 meters? You know, so it's understanding the. The privilege, the. The opportunity, all these. Because when you live that, when you. When you understand how. How exciting and beautiful life actually is, you appreciate it more. You're willing to work harder for it. When we're caught up in the. In the grind, we don't appreciate anything. We don't understand how beautiful it is. All of a sudden your kids are 20, they've moved out of home, and you don't have a relationship.

That's the difference between being present and being involved in your family. And that's the key. Like, yeah, it's okay. Like, what you're saying. Like, you pull up, you pick the kids up, but you're sitting in the car or whoever's sitting in the car, and you're not there. Like, exactly the same thing. Whenever I'm there on a Tuesday or Thursday afternoon when my son sees me or my wife. My wife, my daughter. Sorry. Like they say, and you just see this big smile from ear to ear. And nine times out of the 10, when my son sees me, like, parked just down the road, and then kind of, I won't get out because of. You know, sometimes we're strapped for time, but as soon as he sees that car, he just runs. And he's just so excited about that. And that's why, kind of in all their sport and what they've been doing, I've always been involved in that, and I've been the coach. Not that I knew anything about soccer and anything else, but, hey, listen, I was there. I was present. I was participating. And that's really what it comes down to. Like, and the question I'd put to anyone, like, are you really there and are you present or are you just there? Kind of just there for time. That's the key. It's really important now. And. Yeah, absolutely. Fantastic.

Yeah.

And the greatest way you can be present is by making sure you're turning up to be 100%. That's why we have the energy. That's why we have the habits. What are the most. Everything we do? And it's been an evolving message of what we do here, but with high performance. Father. Yeah, it's. It's. Everything we do is built around those two most valuable and finite resources, time and energy. What are you focusing on? And who are you bringing to the table? Yeah, actually, like, yeah. Are you being present or you're just presenting yourself? You know, be fucking present. Be. Actually be there in that moment, you know, and appreciate that, because it is a privilege. It is a gift. Instead of everyone else or most people in the world, just look for those little fucking fixes, those quick little hits have. Dopamine fixes, little things that distract them to keep them. I said that to Corinne last night. I said, this calendar. I said, this calendar is fucked. We need to have spots in this calendar where we purposefully have nothing. Like, how often people say that. Like, we've got to fill that in. That has to be filled in. There's a gap there. What can we do? Like fuck that. The point of this is no point. And sometimes that is the point, having no point. So you can just be present with that purpose of being present with your children. Because there's always something like we shared Ken, with the opportunities that presented themselves for you. There's always something we can improve on, which is, which is beautiful. That's the gift of life. The crazy part is there's a high possibility that all of us, including you guys listening to this, there's a high possibility that you can do anything that you want. There's a high possibility that you can do anything that you want in this world. The hard part is we're all going to run out of time. So in the same, at the same stroke, it's like a double edged sword is like, yeah, you can fucking do anything you want in this world.

Yeah.

But with a limited resource of time that you don't know how much you actually have. So it's not that you can't achieve things, it's just that, well, you're going to fucking run out of time. So how about we dial it in on what those most important things are and we measure it in a true and genuine fashion. Not just tickets, ticking the boxes, but the facts and feelings. So we're not only connected to life, our family, as we care about, we're consistently turning up and looking to turn the ratios in our favor and improve on things that matter most. And be just as proud of the things you say no to. In fact, even more so because that's giving you the leverage and the freedom and the mental capacity to go. Now I can say a full, wholehearted yes to this because I've said no to all those other little things that didn't really matter. What an episode. I'll. I'll just double check and make sure I hit record so Ken doesn't tell me to right off.

Is this a two parter.

Computer? Doesn't turn off.

It might have been the first two hour podcast.

Yes, yes. So that, that, that finishes up the first section of our 10, 10 piece section. So kickback boys. We've got another eight hours left.

Speaking of time and energy. The time energy.

Yeah, we've given plenty of. Wow, what an episode. What a. What a way to close out or start to close out at the end of a crazy year. I can't believe how quick it's gone. We've done some things, haven't we? We look back and just unbelievable. The delivery, what we've done. The upgrades Everything we've done here, it's. It doesn't seem like, like, not that it doesn't seem like, like, doesn't seem like there's a huge amount of effort involved because it's just one thing, one thing, one thing. But we look over ads and not even Ken. We linked up very early in the year. It's, it's crazy. Crazy how much has been achieved and looking forward to a huge 2022 with you guys and the rest of the tribe.

Yeah, I think too, just tying it back to the whole message we're talking about today is we never would have done all these things that we've done if we didn't plan it, if we didn't track it. You know, all these metrics of what we're doing. The weekly temple didn't just come about because we sat down one day and said, hey, how good would this be? We kind of tracked the data that we were tracking to say, are we getting the right information? Is it working? Are we getting the right result outcomes from it? And then we pivoted and did what we needed to do to improve it. And we've done that the whole way along. And some of the other coaches probably hate us for it because every time we implement something we go, this is really, really good. But okay, now how do we make it better? And we go and plan it out so the next thing they hear is, oh, we're going to use this, we're going to do this, we're going to introduce this. But for us, there's a lot of planning there. And if we weren't dialed in day to day, week to week, what we needed to do and we drifted and we let ourselves get in that mindset of, of we just need to do the day to day tasks, we never would have been where we are right now.

The big thing, I suppose, you know, that when we look at what we're doing and how we're evolving, it's very, very organic. And as we've spoken about on many occasions, and when you really think about it, life is a gift. And there's no more importance than really having a look at where you are at life. And this is not an ad, trust me, this is by far not an ad. And the reason why I'm saying this is that if you're someone that have been on board and being part of this program and you know you're loving what you're doing, why not kind of share that gift with your mates, your friends and everything else? And we're not Doing it here because we're looking for more members. We're really here to change people's thought process. We're trying to implement better habits within their life. So if you've got a mate and they're not in line with you, well, then why not introduce them to something like this so that you don't have to tell them to fuck right off? And that's as true as I sit here. Because if you want to make changes in your life, it's the people around you that support you and are part of your immediate circle. And so when we talk about life's a gift, that's what we're trying to do here. We're trying to give you the gift of life to make better choices. And that's really all it's about. And it's not difficult. It's the 1 percenters. It's really just making sure that you're looking at what you're doing yesterday or what you've done yesterday to improve tomorrow and today. And from that, that's really how hard it is. It's so simple just to implement the simple things in life. So hopefully this might sink into a lot of people and that you can share the love.

Yeah, yeah, love it, Ken. Great way to finish up. And look, as men, it can be typical or ingrained in us to be proud, to not talk about emotions or shares or just share this. Like, start with the podcast, share this. Just share it with your mates, send them a message, flick them the link to this and say, hey, there's this bloke who fucking pumps dads up and he drops the F bomb every now and then. I think you'll like it.

Just tell him that his name's Al, not Ken.

I dropped the F bomb. Ken gives you the F, but he can. He's had his shirt off for this entire session.

Bricks.

Crazy, crazy.

Getting hot in here.

And Adam's right, You know, all we did is just one thing at a time. The most. There's not. There's not most important things. There's most important thing. So when we look at a family softened service, yes, there's three most important things, but it's the most important thing in that area of your life. I think that's why we've been incredibly successful, man, because you have no idea how much I get hassled with real mum movement and doing this and doing that and just so many coming on as a, you know, guest for other people's podcasts, but their values don't align with mine. It's like, oh, do I really want to do that? And it's like, you know, but there's that significance in me. Al can talk about himself for two hours. So why would I? Why wouldn't I, you know? No, no, no. Put that ego to the side. When I say yes to these, I say no to the good men and leaders out there, like yourself, listening to this, who want to be more. You wouldn't be listening here if you didn't want to be more. That's the thing. That's what I love most. Some of you guys might. Not a lot of you guys, actually, most of you guys on the inside, when we're looking at how many are listening to the inner circle. But essentially, you want to improve, you want to change. You don't want to flake on life like every other fucking bloke who just turns it in and goes, nah, she'll be right, that'll do. Because, you know, there's more to be lifted, lived. It's not a judgment, it's an opportunity. But great session, boys. I really enjoyed. This is a phenomenal piece. You know, we'll be throwing this far and wide. Like I said, share this with your mates, family, friends. You know what, we get a lot of guys who share it with their wives. And, I mean, look, yes, yes, we swear occasionally, but, you know, that's one area where we're showing a level of passion. You know, some women, when the guys share this with their wives, they look past that and like, man, this message is true. I can see this is a valuable thing. And you know what? There's lessons that women can take from this, and this is what it's about spreading, like Ken said, the message that is true and genuine and investing in yourself and your habits and your routines and a lot of time, that is your environment that makes a difference. But great session. Great, great session, lads. Anything you want to share as we wrap up, lads? Oh, not really.

I think we've covered everything. Really?

Yeah.

Like Ken said, it's that influence we can have on others, that ripple effect, you know, how you're turning up will influence others. So even if you're not directly saying, hey, this is what I did, this is what I think you should do just by projecting that showing up, you know, when someone says, you fuck, you're looking good, man. Yeah, this, you know, I've just been looking after myself and then, you know, it's starting a conversation about them asking, oh, what have you done? Awesome. Cool. You see, not controlling anyone, but you're having an influence you're because you know our main influence is going to be on our kids, but there's definitely room there to have influence on our workers, our workmates, our partners. You know, wherever we are, we can stand up and show that this is what a high performance, high performance father actually looks like.

It's good stuff.

Yeah, couldn't agree more. True leadership. Take care men. Hope you enjoyed this and got a lot of value out of it and tune in for more episodes soon. We will potentially do a strategies, tactics and tips. Again, there answers you probably already know, but working your way around Christmas and navigating through a period where you should be building good foundation now and especially through Christmas, there's amazing food available to get good protein, more time, more often than not to rest, to walk, to connect, to get good sunlight, to train. I love Christmas time because I actually improve as an athlete, not detract like unfortunately so many do through gluttony and indulgences. So stay tuned for a special episode on that soon. But above all else, what we've gone through in this session, mastery measuring, tracking, take some of the stuff, take all of it, all of the examples that we shared, take them and apply them to your life. Then you'll have a true gauge on where you truly are. Cheers. 1,000 minutes a day. It's a lot. But when you're wasted on shit that doesn't serve you or move yourself or your family forward, you are bleeding the most valuable resource that you and I never get back. How much time do you think you have and how much quality do you think you've had? Don't be a fool like like the masses thinking you will cheat the system or get round to it one day or worse. Just accepting life and sinking back into a slumber of regret. This is your moment, your time. You're cut from a different cloth. You have the hunger and desire to be more and live more. Otherwise you wouldn't be here. So stand up, find the golden nuggets in this episode you just listened to and align immediate action with them and where you want to go. You are worthy. This is your life. You are the king. And this is your kingdom. Now go and claim it by showing, not telling and be the real leader. You and I both know you were born to be.