290. Al's Insights #14

Welcome to another episode.

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Al's Insights, here we go again. Very lucky. We're very lucky, guys, that, uh, this podcast isn't run on petroleum. $380 fucking dollars a liter, I tell you what. But the world is certainly cooked. I mean, I've mentioned that probably more than once. But ultimately, um, just a quick note before we dig into these 4 one-liners that I have for you all. What are you going to do about it? You know, something that was, you know, and I don't, I don't like the word rant, and this certainly wasn't that, but I do get fiery at times. Of course, I'm willing to die for what I believe in. And many people maybe say that, and maybe many people don't have anything to die for in terms of their integrity, the standards, what they will stand up for, which means what they will stand against, you know. So it's, it's, it's tough, man. Like, people will look back in the '20s— not the 1920s, the, uh, 2020s— and that decade, and wow, mate, what a, what a shitstorm we've been up against, right? Crazy. There's always opportunity, you know. So when we look at opportunity, it's, it's one, a perspective, but two, it's an empowering point of view that puts the ball back in your court. What are you going to do about it? What can you control? You know, I think that's what I love most, but I think that's what I enjoy about this process, man, you know, in, in earning the right to serve you, you know, it's It really is a privilege and an honor. You know, like we're all leaders here. It's not, hey, fucking look at me standing on stage. It's, we're all leaders here. And there's got to be that level of respect and even camaraderie, even if you're not in the inside of HPF to go, hey, you know what? This guy's got something worth listening to. And hey, you know what? You guys are worth me pouring into. Otherwise I wouldn't do this fucking podcast and nearly 300 episodes and do something else with my time. So it's a beautiful thing, but. But I really do feel privileged and honored to, to serve you men. Uh, you know, and I think what I do enjoy is I'm not some 40 kilo bloke with a fucking man bun who's talking about breathwork to command a whole legion of men. Now I say that to all of you men out there who might weigh 40 kilos or less, have a certain hairstyle and enjoy breathwork. All could be valuable things. Well, I don't know about the man bun, but they all have their place. But yeah, man, like, I, you know, I, I dress casually and I dress well. I look after myself, um, my skin when my wife tells me to put some cream on, but yeah, look after my hair. Um, I'm not a fucking supermodel, uh, but you know, I've got a few, a few battle scars and plenty of wounds all over the body. But you know, it's like, yeah, man, I I'm fucking put together, but I worked hard on that, mate. The fat kid that no one fucking liked, had nothing, had no idea how to provide value, or, you know, it's not even about making money, just provide value. I was an 18-year-old who just wanted to go out and play fucking sport, get paid for it, right? So yeah, but I want to keep challenging myself. That was that vehicle which turned me into an elite athlete. And, um, not even now I have kids, having beautiful children, but all of them having operations, and it's tough. And we've all got, you know, growing up in St. Clair, St. Mary's, Mount Druitt, like tough places, man. Um, don't know if they're any easier now, but they'll tough back in the '80s and '90s. So it's not, I've earned the right to speak, so fucking listen, but it's just, I enjoy looking back, man, and reflecting on what were once wounds that are now hardened battle scars. So when I look at where the world is at the moment, just on this, it's like, well, let's fucking do something about it, mate. I mean, that's, that's why we're here, over 500 men inside our community and looking at building in family, self, and service. And it sounds so, um, either counterintuitive or misplaced, but no, no, it really is. You know, it's, it's a, it's a saying that's actually in our movie, which premieres, uh, depending on when you watch this, April 1st. It's not a joke. April 1st, 8:30 PM, the, the movie premiere of Men Who Rise proper. Proper feature film, uh, goes for 4 hours. Now, not that long, but it's— yeah, it's incredible. So if you're listening to this before then, 8:30 PM, jump on, find the links. Um, you could do highperformancefather.com/men-who-rise. The dash is a hyphen. Uh, but yeah, man, can't wait for you guys to watch that. Fuck me, it's so inspiring, mate. I'm hardly in it. I said that at our Brisbane event last week, and the guys sort of laughed like that. I'm serious, like, I'm not into that much. It's not— it's definitely not about our— it is— don't even compare it to the COZY 3.0 documentary. It's, it's, it's completely different animal, completely different planet. But I look at the world today and I was like, yeah, yeah, like fuel, like what else is there? Fucking what else? What else can be real and/or quote unquote fabricated? You know, I mean, what's the difference between a conspiracy and, and the truth? Time, right? I get all that. And, and some conspiracies are bullshit and many of them are true for sure. But even that, this is what people need to understand, whether you're left or right, the two wings are the same fucking bird anyway. But, but, you know, No matter where you stand, you go too deep on something, relinquishing your control and your power of you as a sentient being, mate, a spirit of fucking light that you can do something with this world, with this life as a human, as a man, as a leader. You're forfeiting your power. So whether you're right or not, those rabbit holes don't serve you well. I went in all that shit, man. I did all that shit in 2015, 2016, all the rabbit holes, all of them, mate. Anyone could think of the child trafficking and the global elites and Satanism and all the shit which is tied into that really. So, you know, it's all sources lead to evil. And that seems really far-fetched, but does it? I mean, like, you think all the shit you either read in— not even the Bible, but yeah, the Bible, but history, World War I, World War II. You look at, you know, even going back in, in, in the, um, the ancient times, you look at all the wars, all the horrific evil that was happening. Fucking horrendous shit, man. And even child trafficking today is a fucking monstrous industry. See, but my point is, you look at all the things in history, you think that evil's gone? You think because what, we have technology and nice clothes that that shit's disappeared? Ah mate, fucking evil, you know, it's part of the fucking deal, mate. It comes with the territory. Yeah, it's daylight and nighttime. It's two sides of the same coin. So I'm not saying that to say, hey, you know, evil people are putting the prices of fuel up. Like, don't be so fucking ignorant, um, in trying to join dots like that. But ultimately, fellas, what I'm saying is regardless of how fucking hard things are, the next virus that has a 99.97% survival rate that's going to kill us all somehow, um, the next fucking shortage— I mean, I'm really worried about logistics, really. When you look at like farmers, like the people who are driving this, like, mate, if trucks stop, Australia stops. Like, fuck me, mate. Like, where's, where's the respect for the truckies? You know, it's, it's, it really is. And mate, All industries of value, but, but what I'm saying is, you know, you look at society and how much we balance on a knife's edge. It's pretty crazy, isn't it? But if you just went balls deep into observing and viewing all of that through the advantage you have of technology and embracing every environment in the whole world, every single environment in the whole world also has a piece of you and a piece of your mental real estate and your heart, your spirit, and your soul focusing on something that you can't fucking do something about. Some war overseas, or you won't do something about, or pulls you away from what you can do inside of the realm of you and your life. Which is this piece in this movie that, uh, one of our members shared from an old Greek woman who was his neighbor. There's peace in the home, there's peace in the street. If there's peace in the street, there's peace in the suburbs. If there's peace in the suburbs, there's peace in the nation. And that's not even about peace, war, or rioting. That's about a way of life. As men, what do we look for in our wives and our children? Our sanctuary, our home, a place where you can come to rest. You've gone out for the day and hunting and killing and all the things like, let's convert that in the modern world. You've gone out and worked hard serving other people, providing value to society, keeping this country, this species running with your point of value and your specific industry with your specific role. You want to come home. You just want peace and harmony, man. That's all we want as men. A sanctuary to come back to, recluse back into, and have that comfort of our home. A man in his kingdom. The movie The Castle, right? Man's home is his castle. So when I look at this, guys, yeah, look at newspapers over the last 120 years. Guess what? Every fucking 10 years something's going to end the world. So what do you do? You focus on what you can do, what you can control, and you keep fucking moving forward. You don't stop. You keep growing. You keep innovating. You learn hustles, you learn skills, other things, like whatever it is, mate. Like we're not a remote company. We had over 500 catch-ups last year and we're planning to do 1,000 this year. We've already done some of our major events starting with Brisbane, which was a huge state event, massive success for the boys. Unreal. Loved it. Um, you know, all over the country we travel, but also during a time of COVID Wow. How lucky. But, but was I? I started investing in a greater way to reach men through what was traditionally an online platform, which has now turned hybrid online and in person with Real Dad Movement. That was 2 years before COVID Everyone's going, ah, you're fucking mad, mate. Online, fuck that bullshit. All my mates, all mates who had gyms, nah, brick and mortar all the way, mate. Good luck, you'll fail, you'll die. Good luck, brick and mortar, mate. Something real, something you can touch. They're all fucked. Poor bastards, like I feel for them. You know. COVID happening wasn't their fault, but their ignorance to adaptability and change was. The lack of responsibility to fucking doing something and positioning yourself. Now look, we're all vulnerable. If oxygen doesn't exist, we're fucking dead. We don't have water and food, we die. Like, I get that. Like, we're all exposed in some way, shape, or form. That's why there's no such thing as self-made and no such thing as independence in this entire world as organisms. Organisms, we have relationships, you know, trees, oxygen, like it's the animals and the sacred nature they hold with us eating. I mean, if you're, um, vegetarian, all that stuff, like, cool, but then you got plants and fruit and vegetables. So there's, there's, there's energy which transfers and transforms, right? Fellas, I just wanted to, you know, I went pretty hard in our— so I won't do that today, but I went pretty hard in our community doing a live video about this, but it's like Whether it's the fucking dark suits or not, mate, like, don't lose yourself in chasing some other bullshit outside of you instead of looking inside of yourself, your home, who you could become, how you can leverage yourself and your skill sets to transfer to other things. If money's the prize and you need more fucking money for your family, how can you become better? Don't just work more fucking hours. What can you do with the hours you have? What can you cut away? Yeah, so that's— and I'll expand on that a little bit through these 4 one-liners, but I just wanted to start with that. Like, it's, it's There's always a reason to fucking die, worry, be filled with fear, and pull away and run away scared. There's always, always— I'll tell you what, there's always fucking reasons not to as well. There's always reasons to stand up for something and fight for what you believe in and become more and become better and do more and do better. Always reasons as well for the upside of life and what's possible. One-liners. First one: your wife isn't watching your intentions, she's watching your behavior. So these first two are very similar, these first two one-liners. I'll do the second one shortly. This first one: your wife isn't watching your intentions, she's watching your behavior. Your behavior is how one conducts themselves at any given situation and/or circumstance. So could be your behaviors in the morning, your behaviors with the children and logistics of the family, your behaviors in how you interact with her, the energy that you give off. All that sort of stuff, right? Um, and I get it, man. Like, for us, physical touch more often than not is, is the key and the prize to feeling valued. Uh, it's not that— women, if you ever listen to this, it's not about us just having sex with you. Not at all. It's, it's about that feeling and that connection. Um, and having intimacy is, is a very interesting thing because when you're, you're having, you're having sex or making love, when you're having intimacy, um, with your wife there's this combination of, of, of power and pleasure. Um, and power could be pleasurable, but like, there's power. You're giving your man power. Like, it's not, you know, like, it's not submission either. Just understand that. And then for you men too, but you know, it's, it's the closest two human beings will ever be. Like, men were on the battlefield or footy teams. You hug, you embrace, you high-five, you know, all that sort of— that, that's cool. But like, you, you become one. When you're having sex, when you're making love with your wife. That matters to a man, like it really does. It's not about just getting your dick wet, um, not to be rude, it really matters. Like you're making, you're making love, and that's a symbol of, of, of power to a man where he feels important because that's just with, with him, just with you, right? And, and, and the pleasure, like the pleasurable things of life, you know. And then I speak about this, don't ever let pleasure outweigh purpose. Purpose must always be greater than pleasure, which is why things like porn and that, just no-go, no-go zones, fellas. Um, it takes so much small. That I spoke about that last time. But when we look at behaviors, that's what can drive so much value in you. I get it, a lot of you guys will reach out to HPF Coach because your wife wants to leave, or it's something around the marriage. We're not like those other fucking relationship courses. They use these hooks to reel you in. They give you all this bullshit, bullshit, which is either fucking typically reconstituted institutionalized fucking therapy advice, or how to fucking pick up chicks playbooks. Like, fuck that, man. Like, The vehicle is different to the reason why you're here, to the reason of what it is that you want. And that's the irony of this. Okay, well, I've dropped the ball in my marriage. Hand goes up, taking ownership, falling on my sword. How do I fucking fix it? We fix it by becoming more valuable so that she becomes undeniably attracted to you. Well, how do I do that? Well, what are your behaviors? You could be an absolute Romeo and buy her flowers and post-it notes, all that sort of stuff. If you're sloppy as fuck with the children, not looking after yourself and your own health, who would want that? Who would find that attractive? No one would, mate. Would you? Your wife isn't watching your intentions. So intentions are what I intend, right? What I intend to do. So intentions are a precursor to an action or outcome that has not yet been pursued or attained. What is that? Ah, mate, it's fucking words. It's promises. It's, it's potential at best, which becomes empty very, very quickly and useless very, very quickly when the gap between the intention being made and the outcome not being reached, or deadline, so to speak, come to a head. It becomes very empty very quickly. Or good intentions, but you fucked it up and did the wrong thing. Like a lot of you guys who become too much of a panda, plenty of Viking at work, but then panda at home. Why? Well, there might be a skill gap, one, two. Could be the fear of loss, which is the undercurrent for all people that drives decisions and actions. Wow, deciding out of fear. Come on, man, tell me how that ends good for you, anyone else. What, because you stayed married for 14 years instead of 10? Because you stayed married for 40, 50 years, but you're both unhappy? Yeah, no, no, no, there's no— there's no— whether you stay married or get divorced, like, there's no good outcomes. Get divorced, find someone, no good outcomes. Because fundamentally you've been operating out of fear. So your wife isn't watching your intentions, she's watching your behavior. This is why you becoming the prize in HPF and the vehicle is about you getting structure and your shit together, getting you in order with your physical and mental capacity. What does that mean? You're stable, you're a competent man, you showcase discipline and commitment. It's not about getting a six-pack, it's about the behaviors that drive the outcomes of a six-pack, four-pack, dropping from 30% to fucking 18% body fat. Fucking great, mate. I don't have a six-pack right now. I'm fit as fuck. I'm in great shape. I'm attractive to my wife. You don't need to become Mr. Olympia. And as I'm learning, it's certainly harder as you get older, isn't it, men? That's for sure. It's like I turned 40 last year. I just got this extra little layer. It's like, hey, what's going on here? But no, all jokes aside, look, I'm in good shape. It's the behaviors and it's not, it's got nothing to do with her. Me as a father, but they are her kids. Me is a fit, strong, capable man who's mentally stable, making decisions when shit hits the fan at home. I'm cool, calm, collected, in control, driving leadership decisions, taking the mental bandwidth off her plate. Like, all these things impact and affect her in some way, shape, or form, but have nothing, quote unquote, to do with her. That shit gets her hot and heavy for me, man. Why? Because the peripheral value— Corinne's watching my behavior going, that is, that, that's the stuff at a primal level that attracts me and I want, and I want to be part of. And even if it's a little bit of, um, not jealousy but possession, which, which women have, even though they might put up the big, um, you know, put up the big mask and put the act of not caring— 100%, like, yeah, he's mine, that's my man, no one else will have Your wife isn't watching your intentions. She's watching your behavior. Second one. So just remember that, like, what are your behaviors? How are you conducting yourself? Right. Honey and handsome time, she shuts you down. How do you respond and react? Little powwow sookie, or do you bounce back? And that's, you know, like there's, there's a few intimate sort of, not tricks, but things that I'll do with Crin, like, you know, we want to have intimacy and whatnot, and she might shoot it down. And and, um, and, and get her worked up but still be able to calculate, um, I don't know if she'll be able to tonight. She's got this on, she's got the kids, little Flossie's been really tough, and— but I'm going to push, push, and push, and then I'm just, yeah, well, that's okay. I mean, I don't, I don't have to have sex. I just want to have intimacy with my wife, but if it's not tonight, it'll be another night. So I'll really work her up, and pull away is probably not the right word, but I'll, I'll then pull back and not pursue at all when it's nighttime, we hop into bed. And there's other times where I'll be assertive. I'll be like, hey, you got— and please, if there's children listening to this, kids probably shouldn't be listening to this episode. Um, and I hope Corinne doesn't listen to this episode, but no, there are times— and I say this, I'm very playful, so I say this respectfully— but there'll be times where I'm like, hey, you got a fucking 24-hour deadline and you better get on this or else, right? So, so, oh, I'll say shit like that. Man, I hope Crin never watches this. I'm going to bring her on for a session soon, boys. We've just got to try and get Flossie into a bigger sleep cycle of napping because we get about an hour at best. And I think with Crin, it's going to be a, um, a titanic 2-hour episode. But, but yes, I will do that. I will do that. I'm getting a bit sweaty here in this office again. Um, there we go. But yeah, I'll do stuff like that. I'll be like, hey, fucking mate, you better— just all playful, all playful, right? It would blow, man, it will fucking blow you away. It will blow your mind, man. The amount of times that has immediately led into a conversion, right? So I've got a pipeline. I've got my leads. My leads are Corinne and that's it. So I've got one lead. I'm going from warm to hot, right? So it's all sales, right? It's all sales and conversions with the wife. All right. As a conversion and, uh, and Corinne paid in full now, but look, the HPF Coach Oh, fuck me. What a time to be alive. Um, fellas, that, that is, I don't like the word play, but that is playfulness. That's a real thing that I'll do. And wow, what a decisive commanding man. And I don't, I don't grab my wife and, well, when she wants me to, I'll grab her and take her, but, but I don't like, please understand this is, this is like beautiful stuff. It's, it's so playful. It's, it's commanding. It's Viking. It's panda. It's, it's the art. It's the entire art, man. And, um, so yeah, rule 101, consent matters. Um, no doesn't mean yes. Persistence doesn't beat— well, actually persistence does beat resistance, but this is not a good example to bring that up. What gives me the leverage to be able to do that? The suite, the range of my behaviors, but guess who's driving them? Me. Not fucking reacting. Not being a little fucking boy, not crying, poor me, right? It's just, yeah, it is persistence beats resistance, I guess. Taking all these different angles and being detached, because sex isn't the end game. It's a continuation of connection and alignment and realignment with those you love and care about most at each stage or type of relationship you have. Your mother and father, what's the type of relationship you have with them if they're still alive? You know, bless them. Your wife, your siblings, brothers and sisters, your children. So It's not just your wife, right? It's the people closest in your life. They're not watching your intentions, they're watching your behaviors, and that drives your level of value, certainty, and predictability in their eyes, which gives them permission to bring the walls down and embrace, um, strong, loving, and vulnerable, uh, relationship with you. Second one, do you listen to what they say or are you seeing what they communicate? I've said this a couple of times in the, in the community, like, super important. So how's your day? Oh yeah, no, it's finals. I have a feeling, I hope I didn't do this on a podcast. Sorry if I'm repeating myself, but I got a feeling I did this in a coaching session on the inside. But yeah. Yeah. How's your day?

Oh, you know, it's great.

You know, we got there in the end. And like anytime they rattle off a statement like that, half out of breath, you're like, well, fuck me. They're obviously not great. So listen to your wife, your children, when they're in a state of stress, don't try and hold them accountable to their words. That doesn't work, mate. Do that with men. Sure. But don't do that with your wife and kids. It never works. There's being right. And then there's doing the right thing, right? Doing the right thing that is acknowledging the words they speak, but know that what they're saying is not the fucking words. It's what they're communicating that matters. What's their energy like? What's the frequency, the vibration? You know that, boys. Like, it's the wavelength. What wavelength are they on? Do you need help with anything? Nah, nah, I'm fine. I've got to just sort out the— Hey, hang on a minute. Hang on a minute. It's all good. Like, I'm in the office here. I can come out for 5 minutes. I'm not going to ask you, do you want me to do something? What you've just said, I'm going to run the bath, you go sort the rest of dinner, and I'm going to make sure that Stella and Roman pick up all the toys and the shit that they're playing with down in the lounge room, which has made it a pigsty. Okay, all right, you go, you go back. Not you go back at the kitchen, but you go back and do what you need to to sort out dinner, and I'll sort out the rest. That won't hinder me, so don't you worry. There's always going to be fucking work for me. I'll handle those things now. You sort out what you need. If you need me to hold Florence because your arms are tired, I'll hold her while I'm running the bath and sorting out the kids. Done. Don't listen to what they say, boys. Listen, hear, watch. So listen and hear, but also watch and see and feel. Get a feel for it. Like, what are they actually communicating? What is this person— what are they really saying in their words, their posture, their body language? The way they've communicated with you today, this week, this month. We used to call it a star system, right? It was like a relationship space I did in my events last year. Think of the star with 5 points and every point is the number 12. And you can do this as a very quick review. This is a little bit of a side bonus for you, a quick recap. Where, like what happened, what happened, what was the situation, circumstance, scenario that might possibly be related to where they are right now. 12 months ago. So, so the whole related to where you are right now with your wife or your kids or your business or your brother or your father, mother, anything and everything that could be related to this situation I'm in right now with them and how they are behaving. What could possibly contribute to that 12 months ago? The next start point, 12 weeks ago. The next start point, 12 days ago. Oh, sorry, sorry, let me recap. Years, years, man. For some of them, it's years. 12 years ago. What could have possibly led to this? Could be the European woman who watched her mother fucking dominate the father. The father became a bitch, full fucking panda. The little girl watched her mum become a fucking monster, overly masculine indexed, too much Viking father had fuck all. He was full pan. Her daughter saw that. So what does that mean? That is the standard for relationships. So yelling, screaming, hot, passionate sex with the Euros. Sure. Awesome. Good on you, man. Fiery Italians. But then what does that come coupled with? The weak fucker man of the house. That connection was actually seen because they were both married and they were her parents as the motherfucker dominating the father. And if there isn't yelling, there isn't connection. So all of you with Europeans and Brazilians and fucking the rest of them, I guess, like who are exposed to that, when they're fucking yelling at you, they are seeking normality and something that familiarizes them with at their core, wounds or not, a deep-seated upbringing that is part of their makeup and DNA, which equals connection. So what could have possibly happened 12 years ago? 12 months ago? Oh, that's right. Yeah. 12 months ago, Corinne gave birth to Florence and that was really tough for her. And she went down into a bit of a dip and struggling, a fourth cesarean, thought she was going to die. Not that it was that, Flossie's only 4 and a half months old. What could have happened 12 months ago? What could have happened 12 weeks ago? Did something happen 12 weeks ago? Oh yeah, we had to cancel that holiday because, you know, my cousin, my cousin's cousin died and we had to go to the funeral and we're really close. Like, what happened 12 weeks ago that could have led to your wife being on edge or something happening with your kids or, you know, they could have broken their arm 12 weeks ago and then they didn't make the footy team. Like, what happened 12 weeks ago? What happened 12 days ago? And what happened 12 hours ago? So that's the STAR, right? And it doesn't— you don't have to use all of it, but it's a quick reflective piece because my kids are 9, 7, and 5, right? So, or 6 and 5, she's about to turn 7. Well, nothing happened 12 years ago. They didn't exist. But 12 years, 12 months, 12 weeks, 12 days, 12 hours. What happened this morning, which is why my wife's fucking shitty, or this is happening with the kids, or— just want to share that with you boys. Do you listen to what they say, or are you seeing what they communicate? And sometimes doing a quick recap on that 12-star, those 5 points can help you go, ah, people invest when they see value. They keep investing when they feel valued. So if you can know more, that's one of John Maxwell's laws, know more than before, that's leadership. So if you can know them better than themselves though, know exactly what my wife's thinking, where she's at, her energy levels. She's gone to an appointment, getting physio. She's got really sore feet at the moment, the poor thing. And I'm picking the kids up from school right after this. So if I can navigate her life today, and find areas where I can alleviate and pull back on some of the stress for her, some of the mental bandwidth, making decisions, dinner. I'll still go to the gym this afternoon after school. Like, if I can organize my day in a way that also complements her in leadership, because I've got bigger capacity, bigger vision, and I fucking should as a man in what I'm doing in this household. Not that she doesn't have that, but mate, she's just had a fucking child. She's trying to survive, mate. 4 kids, you know, and I'm operating more logically. She's more emotional. It's how we are. Men and women, well, so I fucking should, mate. Like, it's a privilege, an opportunity. It's not a duty or a burden. Listen to what they're actually communicating. Then you can adjust, and then they feel heard and understood. And wow, he gets me. He understands me. Third one, you don't need more time. You need fewer, better choices made in the right order. So my life at the minute is anywhere from 10 to 14 hours a day work. Depending on the day. Um, investing in myself, my physical, mental, and emotional well-being, which is typically gym, nature, keep it tight. I haven't done golf for a little while, not that I'm any good, but yeah. So there's a little bit of hobbies in there. I like doing Lego, although I do that with Roman, not really on my own, but I'm not against it though. I used to do Lego, but I just, I enjoy doing it with him, right? Because something we can both do, even though I'm building at the same time he is, and I'll build the complex battle tanks and he'll build the army, the Lego army men, which is like 3 steps. Awesome. But that's it, man. Like, so with all this bullshit going on in the fucking world at the moment, you just got to look at yourself and go, hang on a minute, where can I do a proper audit? Look at my time, find where all the bullshit is, fuck that off. Like, there are so many TV series that I reckon I'd fucking love, and I'll never watch one episode ever, ever. You just cannot get that time back. So I'm spending 10 to 14 hours a day. HPF Coach as a mission is growing astro-fuckonomically. My relationship with my wife continues to improve with more stress, pressure, and children. My children continue to grow and and nurture, with one of them only being 4 and a half months old. My body continues to get stronger, sharper, bigger, more muscle. I'm booked in for a DEXA scan— oh sorry, booking in for a DEXA scan soon. Had one at the start of the year. Like, fucking great. Is it really a sacrifice? Because I'm not doing shit with the fucking boys and drugs and alcohol and fucking TV and all these other distractions. And I mean, I miss my jet ski. That was fun. That was good time out. But I love doing that for the kids. That was so much fun. But I got my family, man. Man, cup is full. Brisbane, I'm fucking 80 blokes. They're the kinds of, it's the kind of culture and the kind of memory. I'm like, it's the childhood dreams. I'm like, fuck, I wish, I wish we all just lived on the same street. I used to say it to my mates when we were growing up. You know, it's fucking sad, mate. Like, it's, I leave those events genuinely on the plane on my own again going, fuck, those guys are just such legends, man. They're working so hard on themselves. They're so fucking committed and it's hard and they're fucking dropping the ball, but they're picking it back up and, and they're making mistakes. But they're not fucking giving up or giving in. And I just fucking love being around that because it inspires me. You know, it's not because I'm better than them, it's not because I'm here to fucking lecture them or teach them things. They're reminding me of the core values and principles of fucking being a man that leads and doesn't give up and never says die. It is. So shout out to you boys. It's fucking sad, mate. I love the Brizzy crew. We got Victoria soon, but all of them are awesome. Like, mate, South Australia crew, they've been crushing the competitions online. You know, we've got New South Wales as well, the Perth boys, mate. The WA crew's fucking epic, man. The way they catch up and get to all of them, all, you know, it's, um, and then we've got our little pockets like NT and ACT and Tassie. But yeah, it's, that's a fucking, mate, sad sometimes, man. I finished those events, I'm like, ah, man, it goes so quick. I'm just looking into these eyes of these men. I'm looking into 80, 80 lifetimes being built, you know, hundreds of children, 2 to 3 You know, the average I think is maybe 2 or 2-point-something kids per family, but hundreds of kids being impacted, wives, and it's fucking special, man. So maybe I'm lucky in my industry, I don't need fucking mates, I don't know. But, but I look at it as, you know what, I don't want fucking friends in this world, I want fucking brothers, right? Whether you fucking fight, you're not aligned, you collaborate, you debate, you're so fucking tight compared to friends that just keep up fucking appearances and happy faces. And like, it's a beautiful thing. Not, not that me, me and the HPF Coach crew crash tackle each other through fucking gyprock walls like me and my real brothers did, but I'll tell you what, mate, that's the feeling you want though, man. That brotherhood. So just like the rest of the world, you don't need more time. You need fewer, better choices made in the right order. So if you need to develop your skills, get better, build a fucking side hustle, reallocate your time, do more work, maybe, maybe not. Get better at your work, develop your skill sets, work on yourself and your health and your wellbeing. That will give you clarity of mind. And then bang, that fucking idea pops up. I can't give you the outcomes, but I can give you the answers which will show these outcomes. Opportunity won't come looking for you. Success does not come fucking looking for you, man. You must go and hunt that fucking thing down. You must go find it. It never looks the way that you think it does. Everything I've been doing for fucking decades, mate, since I was 13, has primed me to be exactly where I fucking am today. 27 years. I couldn't have told you as a fat fuck who wanted to kill himself at 13 years of age that I was going to fucking lead men all across the country in HPF Coach and be the number one fucking movement for fathers and families. No fucking way. No way. And we're just warming up. We're already fucking number one and we're just warming up. That's crazy. That's fucking scary. Our goal, man, is a stadium full of families helped by 2030. That's 20,000 fathers over the next 4 years. Hit nearly 10 now. We've got fucking work to do. Same amount of men, half the time. No way did I see that. Professional athlete? You fucking kidding me? All I thought about was myself and running the fucking ball hard and tackling people. CrossFit? You fucking kidding, aren't you? Running a gym, my playground, just to fucking stretch, train, do mobility, undo all the bullshit that I got from my injuries with rugby league, and then try and be the big fucking man who can compete in a small man's world of CrossFit? Fellas. The opportunities you go fucking hunting for without fully knowing what they are, but I promise you, man, they fucking pop up. You better believe they do. That's the craziest part about life. They just reveal themselves. That's why I love the unknown. Because I know if you have the mentality and the values and principles aligned with your pursuit of greatness, it will fucking arrive. You will not miss. You will not lose. Yeah, I'm a man of faith. So maybe I become a, maybe I become lucky enough to be a pastor one day. I don't know. I don't even know what my life looks like, fellas, like in the next 10, 20, 40 years. I don't even know. But all I know now is HPF Coach is becoming an indestructible fucking movement that will far outlive me, that won't always require me, which is the beautiful thing. That's what I love most about this. It doesn't mean I won't be involved, man. I'll be with this forever. This is a beautiful gift. I feel so honored. Like, I want to be involved because of what I get out of this, um, in helping so many other people, mate, 100%. There's a difference between wanting to be in it and does it need me. Love it, man.

So good.

But that's, that's the gift. So through these times where it might be tough, whether it's financially or your relationships, and it's not even financial, but it's, that's the mask because petrol's more fucking expensive. So your wife starts cracking the shits, but you're like, well, we've already got the money. Don't worry about it. It's a few extra bucks. Then it's your fucking mentality. It's your skill sets, handling relationships, leadership, how to handle volatile environments, how you can be the chiefest who'll navigate your family through these choppy waters. You don't need more time, man. You, I, all of us, we just need to keep fucking getting better. So when I say that, I say we, not you. I'm not a fucking dictator or man just standing on a stage pointing at fucking people. We all need to get better, myself included. Because if I was better, I would have been able to fucking help more families by now, but I haven't. So let's fucking go. That's the mentality, man. It's not grateful but unsatisfied. I'm not a huge fan of that, um, because of the negative slight on that second piece, but it's, yeah, I am enough. I'm enough to become fucking more and use it. You are enough, man. You're enough to fucking use what you've got. That's what it is. You're enough to fucking use it. So fucking use it. And final one, what stories will you tell? You know, like it's something my children may not understand, but as we enter the 2030s, oh mate, fuck me, the war stories. I've shared this a little bit on this podcast, but the amount of times HPF Coach nearly died, how hard COVID was, pulled all my super out, you know, um, that was fucking horrendous, man. Just, just to survive, like, and I'm sure plenty of you guys might have as well with your business or whatnot, but mate, so fucking hard. What stories will you tell? Like I said, I will never be associated with the word coward. No fucking way, mate. No way. No way. But in the 2030s, hey, here's what a decade looked like where I lost everything. Many times over in every fucking circle, family, self, and service. And this is what I did about it. This is what we did about it. These were the people around me. This is what we built. This is how we helped others. This is how we led. This is how we provided value. Like it's not just, hey, we all have stories. We all have stories. And even if they're bad stories, um, they can still be filled with facts. So when we say your stories, like, yeah, you could have really bad factual stories where you were a victim. You're a victim of, um, you're a victim of circumstances. But it's on you if you choose to be a victim of nature and you just fucking hold onto it. What stories will you tell? I know that's a, that's a, it's a very short one-liner to finish on, man, but what stories will you tell? I'll let you run with that. Is it the stories you'll tell in 6 months' time on how you handle yourself through whatever's going on right now? Is it 6 years' time? Is it 16 years? Is it 36 years as an old man? All we will have when we're older is the people around us and the stories of the life we lived. Wow. That's so awesome. Or so horrific. Could you imagine not having any valuable stories to tell and no one to tell them to? Shit, man, that gives me chills, and not in a good way. What stories will you tell with the time that you've spent in this life? I know I say it, but yes, man, I truly hope this does serve you well I'm here to serve, and, and I fucking love this mission, man. And I love all of you men who are getting up and saying yes to fucking ripping in, whether you're in HPF or not. Just, just saying yes and, uh, not even having a dig, but, but fucking doing what's required, man, to win. Your wife isn't watching your intentions, she's watching your behavior. How you conduct yourself. Do you listen to what those around you say? Are you seeing what they're actually communicating? You don't need more time, you just need fewer. Don't stack your life up. Busy means fuck all. You just need fewer, better choices. And make them in the right order. Don't fuck things up. Like, do it at the right times as well, because going to the gym, like I said, is great, but doing it at 6 PM when my wife and my family need me is not great. And what stories will you tell? Not even on your deathbed. What stories will you tell now? 2 years, 5 years, 10 years? Stories of pure conquest and fucking domination. All the odds were against you. Think of the most amazing fucking stories, Disney or not. Fuck that, mate. You write your own, and they're real. They're true. They're so valuable, so insightful. And layered throughout them are the trials and tribulations, the struggles, the scars, the integrity that came and went, the values that didn't exist and the ones you built, the power of the man you are and how you restored that to full health, the family, self, and service, and how you did have it all. Like, wow, what, what better way to teach future generations, your children, your loved ones, than to share the stories of the history that you lived and created. Powerful stuff. Thank you, man. Appreciate you all. I'll see you on the next one.

If this was an episode that really resonated with you, I thank you for giving the time and effort and energy to yourself, but also to yourself through the vessel and the vehicle of High Performance Father. We've got a lot of wives listening to these now, if they don't mind the occasional F-bomb. Um, you know, I appreciate all of you for spreading the message. And if there's one thing I could ask, I'd love it if you could just give us a 5-star review or spread the love, share this message with those who you know need to listen to this. And there are a lot of people as men proud. We're not too open to go, hey, I'm hurting, I need help, and putting our hand up. But sometimes just a subtle way in their own privacy, whether in the car or the comfort of their own home, it really works when you just send a little link through. Hey Bill, hey Bob, hey James, look, I think you might, I think you might enjoy this. I'm not, I'm just going to leave it there.

You do with it what you will.

But you know, hit this link, man. Just listen to one or two episodes in High Performance Father and Alan, see what he has to say. I'm telling you, man, that That is one of the greatest ways that you can impact. And some of those men out there you think are okay, you're saving lives.

You really are.

I've seen this so many times where you just putting that little subtle message, putting the feelers out there, the amount of men, suicidal or not, the amount of men who are on the brink of breaking down, it is phenomenal, the ripple effect. This isn't my legacy. This is our legacy that we have together by spreading this message and living and breathing the message as well. So thank you. Appreciate you again. Hope you enjoyed this episode, but by all means, share this with someone who, in your gut instincts, in your intuition, you know, you're like, I think they need this, I think they should listen to this. Please, mate, don't hesitate with that. Pull the trigger, make that decision, send it out to them, and you'll be amazed at what you get back. Thank you again, and I'll see you soon.