217. From His Wife Kicking Him Out, To King Of The Castle Again

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He goes, I'd rather the fucking Western star truck hit me than fucking Alex. He goes, you look like he's fucking mascot.

Keep.

Keep going, man. Tiny compared to it.

That's because I ate the pasta, man. I ate the pasta.

He's a weapon.

Too much. Too much pasta when I was young, man. Too much.

Good, man.

So good. Welcome to a very exciting podcast. I just literally got chills in, man. I just got a goosebumps. I got a phenomenal guest, Nazarino Santoro. I've got a. A fellow Italian. Fellow Italian with us. We actually have a fair few Italians in the. In the tribe, Nez, which is cool. But, guys, we've got a very exciting episode for you today. Whether you're watching this or listening to it, I've got a. A guest who is one of the members on the inside with such an inspiring story. Like, it's for all the flak that we cop and the criticism and the. Which I don't really highlight much, man, because it doesn't mean anything, but it, you know, it's still something you see. It's worth it to hear stories like nazes, which you guys are about to hear. And it's just so inspiring to see men who just grab life by the balls again and say, this is my time. I'm going to stand up, I'm going to do something about my position. I'm going to become a leader again in family, self and service. And, you know, we just got to catch up recently in Victoria, which was fantastic to meet Naz in the flesh, and I want to share his story. And it was just. It was incredible to Spend some time with 20, between 25 and 30 men down in Victoria. But more importantly, man, it was great to sort of reflect over your journey and bring you onto this podcast to really share your story, where you're at now. I know we've got some huge things we're going to continue to create together, brother, but you've already made some amazing progress. But first and foremost, mate, you know, welcome to the show and appreciate having you on, man.

Yeah, thanks, Alex, man, this is. This is an absolute honor to be a part of this and the whole program. To be fair, it's an amazing experience. And yeah, everyone that's involved in the inside knows exactly the emotion and the feeling that I'm talking about. It's a different level. And yeah, the. The weekend was. Was off the charts, man.

It was. It was.

It was good. It was really good.

Looking good in that shirt too, brother. We're like twins.

I had to represent. I had the emblem, man. Yeah, yeah, love that emblem, man.

Oh, it's the best, man. Symbolic for life. You know, holding our children up requires, you know, not a. Not only the dedication folks to lift them, but the strength. Right? And it's just. It was epic to catch up. So just. Just for those who may not be sure, I do ex as I am real, mate. What was it like? What was it like, mate? Nell in the flesh, mate. And we. We got to. To hang out together.

I've still got a sore neck, man, because I've got short man syndrome. So looking up all morning was. And Saturday night was. Was pretty hectic. But, yeah, no, you are a man mountain, to be fair. And yeah, no, you are. You are definitely. You give an energy and. And a presence. That's definitely something to be qu. Yeah, your. Your passion is. Is very, very inspiring, motivating as all the fathers are that are in the tribe. But, yeah, no, take my. Take my hat off to you, man. It's. You are real and you are. You are large, man.

I'm not gonna lie. Well, in my eyes, anyway, speaking of passion. That's right. Those. Those peaches. Unbelievable. And that's bought a. Some. Some incredible couple different types of peaches and nectarines. And I mean, for those of you who are listening, you know, best bloody peach in town, mate. 299 a kilo. Get them now. It was proper. It was like an Italian fruit market. I was like, what's going on? Here we go.

I was just passing them here, there and everywhere.

Go.

Come on, boys.

What a difference, though, between. Between getting it fresh and Just I.

Guess everything else and fruit, man, you can't go wrong. The flavor and the smell and yeah, it's, it's a different, it's a different, different taste. So I'm glad all the boys enjoyed it. I, I'm gonna be honest, I didn't, I didn't have one. JK the beast, the, the CrossFit beast, mate, he put me through my paces on, on that with that challenge that we did, that trading challenge and yeah, I tell you what, my stomach wasn't feeling the best after. Straight afterwards.

Yeah, man, you and Jed destroyed it. Well, definitely get Jed on for an episode soon. He's, he's made some amazing success. But you're in fucking good shape, man. Like you it up. Yeah, very impressive.

Thank you. Yeah. When I promised Luki that, that first, that first call that I had, he gave me this opportunity. I made a promise to him that, yeah, that I was going to be 110% all in to change my life. And yeah, the 17 weeks in tomorrow, man, and it's.

Yeah.

And the changes that, that I can proudly say I've made in my life have, have made vast improvements with, you know, with our household, our home, connection with, with my wife and my two beautiful daughters. That three of them mean the world to me. Yeah.

Yeah, well, we'll definitely, we're definitely going to go there, mate, and see the, the kind of changes you've made and, and we'll talk a little bit more about Victoria. But I guess just to paint the picture a bit clearer, I'd love for you just to maybe share a bit of your background, mate. Obviously, I mean you can dive into your upbringing too if you like, but just sharing a bit of your background and, and then I guess leading into, you know, not why we're here, but what was going on in, in, in life, mate, that led to obviously the position that you're in because it's probably something that a lot of fathers go through, man.

Yeah, yeah, well, look, I know, I know there's, you know, every father has a different story that, you know, can sometimes lead down, lead us down the wrong road or wrong path. Look, I'll start, I'll start from. I'm a born and bred country Victorian boy, lived and breathed all things Italian, Italian culture, have an Italian background. Third generation on our land that I'm very, very proud of. I'm a fruit grower by trade.

Yeah.

Being a part of, it's been a part of my life, my entire life. And I love what I do. I'm Very passionate about what I do. I'm a mad football soccer fan. Played, played that for majority of my life. I used to love going to, to soccer on Sundays and I still remember dad playing and he had that big, you know, that big Italian big boofy hairdo and you know it's different, different lifestyle back then but it was a simple lifestyle and yeah, mum and dad, they have been extremely supportive and I come from a very, very loving family as you can well imagine, a very large Italian family and yeah, proud of it and yeah, met move forward, become you know, an adult and was living, living life to the fullest, working hard, playing hard as every single guy does and come across Rosie, love of my life and yeah, she, she took my breath away. And yeah, we spent a couple years just together and then we got married and we built our own home and settled down in town in Cobram. And then we were blessed with our first beautiful child and who's now six, nearly seven, beautiful little girl. And then our second daughter came two and a half years later and, and yeah, look, I've had a, I've had a very, very supportive, blessed life but I could, I honestly can say now with a bit more clarity and peace in my mind that I am the, I suppose the pinnacle, the pin up boys for self sabotage at the time where I indulged in sedating any little issue I had. I can't pinpoint as to when or why I did so. That annoys me, that annoys me now because I'm in a place where excellence and perfection is key thanks to hpf. But I have found peace with it.

Where.

Look, I let my ego and I suppose and the bullshit run my life and it became a major problem then I used to justify, you know, my ego and let that lead and take control of my action and my choices and I didn't have any remorse, which was even, even worse. You know, I started lying to Rose. I was creating arguments and with no meaning, no purpose and, and still justifying, still standing on my own two feet like I would today, as if I was the one in the right. But you know, I hurt Rose a lot and started using illicit drugs.

I.

Suppose to mask those emotions as well as to, you know, things got pretty hectic with service. We were in a position where financially as a family, as a whole, things were pretty tight. So you know, the more we did, the less money we were, we were putting out. So I started to burn out and I was utilizing lisp drugs also to keep me, keep me going instead of, instead of doing the right things that I know now that serve me well now. And with that came a lot of, a lot of hurt and pain with my family. You know, one of the, one of the ex HPF legends. I've listened to his podcast a couple of times and he's even in the Cosby Video where he said, you know, that he loved his wife and he loved his kids, but he was a shit husband and father, man. That resonated with me so much early on in the piece and it still does because I was, you know, I love, love my wife and my kids and they were, you know, getting choked up. Man, this is pretty heavy. Yeah, like they're just. Everything was a chore. I didn't enjoy anything. And I, and it was, you know, it was my own fault. And the more I realized it was my own fault, the more I tried to sedate myself because it put me in a place of, you know, of non reality. It was all bullshit. It was Naz's facade. And when I got pulled up on it. Look, Rose is an intelligent woman and you know, she's a smart woman and she, she called me out, she called me out on it many a times. And as you can well imagine, two hot headed Calabresi's in a, in a, in a, in a room going toe to toe sometimes. Didn't, didn't go too well. Argumentative wise. We were never going to back down from each other. And yeah, I put my wife and my girls in an unhappy, unhealthy environment that it got to the point in October or the start of November where, yeah, Rose has had enough. Look, I'll give her, I give her fucking credit, man. She, she's a resilient woman. And yeah, she held on for very, very, very, very long time. And it got to the point where she just said, Naz, I can't do this no more, man. You like, you, you're ruining yourself. You virtually destroyed me. And all for what life? What, you know, why are you doing this? And she said, I can't, I can't, I can't do this anymore. And more importantly, I can't allow you to be around our daughters with this unhealthy lifestyle that you're giving yourself. And she asked me to leave. And that, that's where rock bottom is starting to, starting to, you know, be my reality. And yeah, I, I found myself in a position where I, I went for a very long drive over a late afternoon overnight, thinking about things and thinking how, how worthless I was or how the Position. I put my. In the. I could say probably in a position where I hated myself and the person that I was and how I disappointed not only Rose and the girls, but my family as a whole. And yeah, there was a time there for a few minutes that, yeah, I was. I was looking. I was. I was looking at giving up. And yeah, for whatever reason, I. I thought of my. I thought of my girls and I thought that I was disgusted in myself or even contemplating that, you know, there's. There's. There's a lot more meaning to life than, you know, than. Than just giving up. And. And I went looking for. For help and I. I sat. I sat Riverside and I got my phone out. And as as many of your special guests on this podcast. Podcast say, they've got their phone out or they're on the computer and they looked for help, they seeked help, and they found high performance father and Alex Ranieri. And I watched the video in Cosi and I broke down, man.

I was.

I was a mess. And so much of what you said and what the other father said in that video resonated with me.

And.

I said to myself then and there that I was going to do whatever it took to be a better father and a person for myself. At that point in time. I didn't think that. That I was going to be able to do anything for Rose to forgive me for the pain that I put her through. But what I wanted to do was at least. At least be a better father and. And support Rose in being a proper parent. And whatever relationship took for. Took. Took forward. After that, I'd have to respect Rose's choices because of, man, what. What leg do I have to stand on when I've. When I've put her through what I did? So I sent a message to you guys, and Luki got in contact with me within five minutes. He messaged back and said, man, look, my message was pretty deep and thorough. And I actually told him where I was and what I was thinking of doing. And I'm forever, ever grateful for Luke for reaching out the way he did. Man. I. Yeah, the words he said to me gave me hope at a time where I was deep in the pit. And he said, you've got to give me 20 minutes, man. I've got an onboarding call to make and I've got to keep this appointment. Give me 20 minutes and I will call you back. And we're going to take the next steps of moving you forward and. And see if we can help you. So, yeah, that I did. And, yeah, the. We went through some questions and we spoke for a lengthy time, and then I had my onboarding call with Zach and, yeah, Remembrance Day has a new meaning for me now, man, because I joined. Officially joined HBF on the 11th, the 11th, 23, and it's a day that have. A day that I would never, never forget the rest of my life. So, yeah, that's. That's where I was at, man. That's where I was at, yeah.

Wow, that's. It's incredible, Naz. Isn't it crazy how. How heavy life can get, man? You know, goosebumps a couple of times when you're sharing that, because it's just. It's just. It just gets so deep, gets so hard. And like you said, we. We find ourselves in the pit and, you know, it was certainly my life five and a bit years ago, and it's. It's really hard, man, because it's such a. It's such a true reality for so many men, but they conceal that reality or the pathway towards that being their reality with. With the lies or, you know, with the misdirection of their focus or the stories they tell themselves and gets tough. And this isn't about to. And we'll obviously talk about your progress moving forward, but a lot of you men out there, this isn't about. Especially if you want to reconcile relationships. It's not about giving up your power either. But, man, like, what power do you actually have? Like you said, what leg do you have to stand on when it's lies and. And, you know, you're betraying yourself and who you can be and the version that you can be? And what do you. I'm just curious, man. Like, what do you think? Like, you spoke about a couple of things, you know, justifying the ego and. And whatnot. And sometimes we find arguments without purpose or meaning, but shores up what we consider to be significance through power or, you know, aggression or emotion. But what do you think's the block, man, for so many men out there, for this to just continue to happen for so long and then things break down? What's the block from men not seeing it? Is it because they're alone? Is it the stories? Like, what do you think's the common thread here where this just becomes such a part of everyday life for so long?

I think, man, we. We. It's the lifestyles that. That us as men perceive or think that, you know, we need to be one of the lads, you know, we need to follow suit, and we just, you Know, have a bit of shits there, a bit of banter and whatever, but, you know, beat the chest. I'm the man. But, yeah, when you, when you, when you take that shirt off, man, we've all got. We've all got the same skin. We've all got a heart beating. And we, we all have. We all have fucking problems, man. We all have problems. And we, we all build, you know, we build this facade that, you know, that my grass is greener instead of, you know, the grass is always green on the other side. You always, you know, and I think, I think it's society today because of social media and things like that that, you know, everybody tries to make everything look pretty and fine, you know. No, you know, you go on social media, nobody's fucking putting in their dirty laundry on, you know, on social media, they're always, you know, putting all the. All the glitz and the glam on it, whatever, and we all get. We all get caught up in this bullshit and then all of a sudden it becomes too hard to talk about or it's, you know, it always goes in the too hard basket because you. You worried about, you know, what your mates are going to think, what your, you know, extended family is going to think or what the neighbor's going to think. But, you know, one thing I've learned, man, is talking about it is power. You know, and if you. If you start opening up and being vulnerable, then if you have a genuine person beside you or another genuine guy beside you who obviously you think you've got, you know, got a relationship with a friendship or, you know, whether he's a business partner or a mate or someone you grew up with, brother or a father or whatever the case may be, obviously you value their, you know, their relationship that you've got with them. So if, like, you start to, you know, when someone. Someone says to you, you know, how things going? I haven't seen you in ages. How are things going? There's your chance. Take that opportunity and go, look, things. Things are doing okay, but I don't think I'm in a good place.

For.

Whatever that reason might be. And then talking about it, then they may feel vulnerable, you know, have that place where, okay, this is a safe zone where, you know, I can actually maybe vent my issues and maybe I can get something and learn something from him in, you know, the things I'm going through. We don't give ourselves that opportunity anymore because, you know, we have to. We have to be the, you know, the man, the, you know, this this guy that everything's just water off a duck's back. And you know, I suppose we look at, we look at things, some of us look at things still in the old values, not saying they're not good. You know, I love my Italian culture and my Italian heritage and, and I am very grateful and respect my father for my upbringing. I'm proud of it. But the world is a different place now to when he was raising me. And although I value the way I was raised, I've had to evolve and change and understand, you know, what's expected of a father today. And I think maybe I didn't, I didn't take that transition all that well and you know, just getting up in the morning, going to work, smashing yourself to bits and not, not looking after yourself and then coming home and you know, think you deserve the right to sit at the head of the table because you're the man of the house. Those fucking days are over, man. You've got to earn that seat, you know, and yeah, that's, that's where I think we're, where we're at today, in my opinion anyway.

Yeah, no, I agree, man. And I think there's like, not that fathers before us, you know, didn't earn it. I do, I don't know what you're saying, but I think that it was earned in a different way. Like you go back 100 years ago, it's like, man, I've got my axes and swords and knives to anything up that threatens my family. Yeah, I know how to grow food so my family doesn't go hungry and that, you know, but in, in the modern world where that's so accessible, it's tough. And it's nothing against women too, but they don't value that. No, they truly don't. So when they know they can get food at the shops, when they know they can get, I don't know, capsicum spray or call triple zero like that, they no longer see value in that. Right. So there's different ways for us as men too, where primal, Primal, wise. That's still important. I absolutely believe it is. But also it comes through communication and other things and, and it's, it's also a case of out of, out of sight, out of mind too. Right. Like you know, my dad, your dad, man, there's a status or going around where in the Modern Day a 12 year old has already seen or been exposed to more things than what an 80 year old with a full had 50 years ago. Like that's insane. But that's that's the level of saturation, Naz, that we as men have to process, that we have to work through. And so it's. It's not that our fathers had it easier, but in terms of focus and distractions, pretty simple, man. My old man came over when he was 6. On the boat, all he had to worry about was catching the chickens for dinner and growing food and. And eating and surviving and working with the family. He was one of six. That's it. And then, you know, fighting the boys that he used to call Skippy. And back then, man, in those days.

Yeah, man, it was different. It was different. I still hear the stories of the after school, you know, brawls that went on, but, yeah, it was. It was. Look, it was a much easier. A much easier life and world back then. So, yeah, you're right. And I do get it. They earned their. They earned their. Their right to have the seat at the head of the table in a lot simpler. A lot simpler way. Whereas now, like you said, we. We as fathers, we're fighting against so many other different things and different avenues, and it's. It's scary.

It's.

I. It's scary raising children in this modern era, I think because of all the. All the shit that they can be so easily exposed to if we as parents aren't keeping an eye and I suppose, and an open ear 24 hours a day. You know, we spoke. We speak quite a lot about just how they're influenced just by the bullshit on. On these cartoons and these TV shows that they watch. Some. Some say, oh, look, they're just kids. You know, we grew up with cartoons and we didn't, you know, we came up winning, you know, grow up to be all that bad of a human. But it's just the bullshit that, you know, that makes them think that they have to have a. This. They have to model their life around this and. Or the way they have to look or, you know, perceived to be. And it's sad, man. It's sad.

No, it is, man. It's. You know, it is, Naz. It's disgusting. There's. There's a book in Big W called Queer Chameleon in the children's section. You're kidding me, right? And I saw a video of this man, showing this Big W, bro, children's section. Queer Chameleon goes through everything, man. Terms I even heard before. And I don't even understand. I don't even think the people who identify as that understand. And I'm like, what the is this book doing? In Big W in the children's section. Queer chameleon. Like it's. You're right, man. So no, I agree. Like it's even, even when I look back then and this is not, you know, obviously at the time I enjoyed it, but I look back, man, and I know it seems a bit crazy and far fetched, but because of the space I'm in as it's a level of understanding that a of people may not be exposed to or know because of what I see. But I look back at like the Simpsons and I used to love that when I was young. Yeah, man. And it's so funny. But at the same time, have a look at the model and the picture it painted of what a man or a father is. Yeah, yeah, he would save the day here and there and yeah, he would be funny, but he's a slob. Just like Peppa Pig. Like they're ripping on him all the time. And I look back in the 90s and he. And he does stupid. And I look back in. In the 90s I'm like, yeah, man, like we turned out okay, but we still had fundamental things like get out, ride your bike and do other things and. And there was still that. The heritage and tradition of previous generations. Whereas now. You're right, man. Like we must. Like there's just such an exposure. It's like Pinocchio. Right? It's no longer the island though, where you willingly know where you're going. You hop on the boat and there's the island to carry on like fucking donkeys. It's an unwilling. Because there's a subconscious tapping in, whether it's at the shops, banners, cartoons, other kids at school who don't have parents that raise them. So they do whatever they want. YouTube, tick tock. So it's no longer a little island, man. It's the entire world. And it's not. I'm actively going to go to this island and do drinking, gambling and break down fake buildings and become a donkey as they turn into. It's a very powerful movie, by the way. Some of the old, old stuff is. But that's the world now, man. It's crazy. And just like for us as men and fathers, it's really hard because we're competing against a lot of bullshit with our wives as well or for our wives because they're emotional creatures and Silicon Valley taps into that. They tap into ways to influence and pull and seduce women to. To perceive value in different ways than just being a good strong man who provides. So it's Hard, like. And that's not an excuse for a lot of you men who are dropping the ball and being sloppy. Like, obviously you need to make sure that you. Everything we live and breathe and HPF and how you communicate and connect and love languages. But yeah, man, people these days just focus on the fake, you know, instead of addressing their problems and improving who they are.

Yeah, some of the things that the HPF has opened my eyes to, like, I hadn't read a book since I was 16, man, and, you know, like, I've read two books and I've listened to on Audible. I think I'm on my sixth book. And I listened to other. Other podcasts. And, you know, what HBF has taught me is knowledge is power, man, and opening your eyes to the world that we live in. And it was like, some of the shit that I have, I've now learned over such a short period of time has just blown me away, man. Like, the way they. They do things for. For tele or social media, how they have people with, you know, with monitors on their brains and their heart to see what. Even what colors that come up on the screen give them an addiction or dopamine to make them feel good, so then they can really, really, really draw people into the bullshit, you know, and we don't watching a TV show or, you know, or our wives watching these things, thinking it's just. It's a time for them to unwind and, you know, chill out. And I'm all for it, man. They deserve it. Fuck, they deserve it just as much as we do. But some of the stuff that they're watching, they are unaware that they're actually being targeted and drawn into this shit and drawn into this, I suppose, belief of this fucking fairyland. And our kids are actually exposed to exactly the same shit as we are as fathers. You know, like the. One of the podcasts that I heard in regards to the. All these gambling websites that, you know, that I was drawn into many years ago, I got sucked in as well. But now I know how they suck you in. They dangle that carrot in front of you, man, and they've actually done tests on these commercials. What is going to draw more men into checking us out, trying us out? And then what colors is a man more exposed to that's going to, you know, make them want to be more involved in it? And I was like, they're just. They're sucking the life out of us, and we're. And we're totally oblivious to it. You know, it's. It's fucking crazy.

Especially with relationships, man. You look at Hollywood and some of the shit they dish up, it's like, so all of a sudden women expect perfection, which means immediately. The opposite of that is they go looking for problems in others. And when I say others, it's their significant others. Yeah. Their husbands or in their relationships. And then it ironically hypocritically takes away the focus on themselves and their own problems. Because women have problems and mess and they need to sort out as well, just like men do. And I remember seeing this, this video of this woman and she's this 200 kilo beast and this massive woman, she was eating some sort of food. I think it was a hot dog or something. She had donuts and she's stains all over. She sloppy, like just horrendous.

Yeah.

And I asked her about the man she wants and desserts. She's like, oh, he's got to be 6 foot 2 and lean. And she made all these demands and I was pissing myself laughing. I was like, is this woman for real? That's that serious? I was like, have a look at yourself. Yeah. What the. Did what, what do you think entitles you to having that when your standards portray extremely the complete opposite? You know, and that's the world we're in, man. Because it's really tough where people believe in a certain reality and the walls come caving down. And unfortunately a lot of the times men and fathers become the outlet and that, that's the hardest part. And one of the other hard things which I'm willing to cop criticism for, but it's important, necessary is when us as men don't put ourselves in the greatest possible position to combat that by being the greatest possible man we can. And that, that's what I'm, that's what I'm focusing on. Like we can talk about all the hardships in this modern world. Yeah. And they are out there, man. Like they absolute. Naz. You're right, Malik. It's, it's, it is unbelievable. The machine that is, is in perpetual motion on trying to just find the greatest way to create addictions inside of humans for profit or any other agenda they have. But the message of us is, well, be a hundred to give a hundred. If you give it, if you give to yourself and invest in you and have the right people around you that are like minded and on the same page, you won't lose. You can't lose. And you can combat that stuff better. And that, that's, that's the, that's the snap. Out of it or the, the, you know, the metaphorical punch in the face that we all need. But hopefully a lot of fathers get from like these podcast episodes. And my videos are like, ah, yeah, well, all. There's everything wrong with the world, but what can I do in myself to, to be 100? And that's, that's where I'd love to go next, I guess. Man on, on your journey with, with HPF on. Okay, cool. Well, you've identified these things and it would have been pretty rough, man. I mean, I guess, you know, I'd love for you to share. You know, from that stage, Rose, I mean, she told you she wanted you to leave and then from there you took those steps that you shared and then joined the tribe and what'd you start doing, man? Like, knowledge is the gateway to power. And then we back that up with action 100%. But what did you do, Naz? How did you change? What did you implement? What. Fast forward 17 weeks, here we are now. What were some of the things that you, you took action on and achieve, man?

Yeah, look, it's, it's been a, it's been a roller coaster, but one of the best rides of my life, man. HPF has provided for me. You know, I just, I want to take a minute to honor the tribe and, and what they, and what they give and what you learn from other inspiring fathers is a testament to every single one of them that's, that's in the tribe. They are all legends and yeah, thank them all for, for their love and support and their guidance. That's one of the things that you get in HBF is other like minded fathers that want to perform, want to be their best. You know, what did I do to change? It's a good question. Kumpadi. It's one of those ones that, yeah, look, I, you know, Luke, Zach, Drew, you know, all of the boys that, all the coaches that I spoke to early on in the piece, they, they bailed me up. They were, you know, they wore their heart on their sleeves. They were all passionate and they said, man, you need to, you need to be extremely open to the process. And there's only one way for any man to get out of the pit and that's to go all in. That's the first podcast that I listen.

To.

How to go all in. And then what going all in all actually means. I listened to those first two podcasts to give myself probably a better understanding of what I needed to do and where I needed to be, you know, for anybody that's listening to this and is looking at, you know, options or opportunity. That's probably two. Two podcasts that, you know, inspired me.

After this one, they'll listen to this one first.

Sorry, forgot it. Forgot to Got to, you know, jack my. Jack up my own podcast first, you know. But then, yeah, it was, it was just implementing change, drastic change. I needed, I needed a slap in the face, man. I needed, I needed a good slap in the face, a good wake up call. Look, things. Things at home were not, were not fucking good at all. As I've shared.

I.

Was given this chance by Rose to, to move back in and to prove myself. She knew I'd taken on hpf and look, she was skeptical at the start and as. As she should be because I bullshitted my way through life many, many times beforehand. So she thought this was just another facade, another bit of bullshit that I was leading her on with. But with that, I started proving myself, you know, and took in all things that HPF had to offer. You know, the tools that we're provided with in this, in this program. And you know, the coaches put it to you straight and blunt, which is. Resonates with me a lot, man. You know, that's the way a man should be. Cut to the shit, cut the bullshit. Let's fucking talk turkey. You know, and all the boys have been like that and they've gone, look, we're going to give you the tools, we're going to help you, we might even fucking push you in the right direction, but it's all on you. What do you want? What do you want to be and how do you want to. To raise your children? And then what kind of relationship do you want to have with your wife? And that was the moment that was like, right, this is where things need to change. And with that, you know, we're given I suppose a few tasks to do at the start that we're. That were when we joined hpf and one of them was, was listening to the. The absolute legend and rock star in podcast of Ren Cheney's Got to give a shout out to him, man, because he is. He's rockstar red man. He's. He's changed a lot of people's lives. His podcast was inspiring for me. Just he's just how raw he was and the things you learn from fathers on the inside is a perfect example. Ren is. But yeah, implementing routine repetition and structure. Planning my excuse pre hbs. I don't have the fucking time. Where can I have the time to spend more time with the girls. You know, Rose used to say, like, yeah, you're good when you're here, but when are you here? Because if it's not work, it's this or that or excuses or. You know, at the time, I had no sense of time management because I would have been probably not on the same planet as, as every other human being because the. That I was taking. So, you know, like, that changed. You know, I'm proud to say that I'm clean from any illicit drugs, anything that is going to change my shift of focus or the direction that I want for myself or my family for a little over 18 weeks now. And I'm so much better for it. I've lost. Where am I? I'm 78.

I've lost.

Lost eight kilos. Looking like a bit of a. Bit of a beast, so pretty proud of that. And my energy levels are just through the roof, like I used to give myself. I used to charge myself up with shit to get me through the days when I was. When I was deep in the pit. And the knowledge that I've gained from hpf, changing nutrition and structure and planning throughout my day has given me so much opportunity and life back.

To share.

It with my family space for myself that I thought was. Was impossible. You know, at the time I. I didn't think it was. It was possible. But, yeah, I'm finding time to go for a run, train, spend time with the girls, catch up with mates that, you know, I was too ashamed to go and see because I was scared that they would bail me up on my own bullshit. I can now stand proud, Alex, on my own two feet and saying that I'm doing, I'm doing, doing right by me. I'm doing right by my daughters, my wife. The connection that, That I have with Rose now, I didn't think was. I didn't think I'd be given this opportunity or this chance. And I'm deeply grateful for her giving me this, you know, this one last chance. You know, she's. She's my rock. And for a long time I wasn't hers, you know, and, yeah, I'm starting to. I'm starting to be that man that, that she deserves by her side. And my daughters deserve to be there and protect them. And, yeah, I can stand proud now, man. Can stand proud now. And. And say every day I'm that one step closer to being that chief that they and I deserve.

Yes. Yeah, it's unreal, man. Yeah. We talk about time, Naz, as well, what you mentioned then, the weekly temples and the stuff that you guys fill in, and obviously it's confidential, but we. We get the data and we use that with you guys and to help you guys and whatnot. But in terms of collating the data, we have access to it all and. 52 million minutes, man. Like, I got you. You boys would be blown away at the stats. I did a video on it yesterday, adding our. Our Facebook group, just like the free community to help fathers and inspire them. And yeah, man, we've done over 5 million minutes of coaching, but the amount of time we've helped fathers get back, he's over 52 million minutes. That's. That's insane. I mean, you can convert that to hours, but that's. Yeah, but that's also a 10x return. Right? Like, I remember one of our first zooms that I did with you guys where I jump in with the new squad and. Yeah, you're pretty direct too, man. And you're sort of like trying to. Trying to find your way. And there were lots of things and like, that's cool, man. Let's just triple down on this one and then this one and then this one. And it was. But I do get it. I can see how it's not even a story. It is reality. You know, you've got 24 hours and you're using them like under the influence or not. You were using that time, just as we all use time. But it's. It's incredible when. Just a couple of notes I made here, that when you do realize you have the power, especially the power of focus, you create such a huge shift in your life, even just the energy with what you're focusing on. Fantastic. So the things that you have to do, you can actually do them quicker. And then with focus, you can choose the right things that are not bound by time. It's not like I want to spend time with my kids quicker. That doesn't make sense. But the stuff with work productivity, when there's an A to B, a tangible outcome, when you have a higher capacity, 100% and you're competent, you can perform that quicker. That gives you time back than the other one. You're choosing the right things. But then when you're doing the right things because of your capacity and energy, you're doing them better. Right. Connecting with the family and the kids. And so, you know, there's something you mentioned, one of the guys, Nath, I'll definitely get him on for a podcast in our Victorian catch up, which we'll go to in a second. He. He Said I just wake up every day, he said. One of the biggest things HPF has helped me with Al is I just wake up every day wanting to be better. And that really fucking hit me man, like is when you boys are just doing a short little shout out so I've got the video as well and I was like, like it's always been such a default for me to strive for excellence and grow every single day. But, and, and so for me, even though there's days where I get punched in the face, it's a, it's a non negotiable but wanting, wanting to be better every day. That's, that's, that's the fire man. That's the spirit, that's the heart and that is, that's the missing piece for a lot of men.

Desire to, yeah, it's, I, it's mindset. My mindset has changed so much. Where look, yeah, life's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination today, yesterday, or will it be tomorrow. But it's the different mindset that we create for ourselves now. You know, we're lucky enough obviously on the inside to have that support but you can, you can change your direction with your action and your choices that you make. If you start just as we say, peeling the layers back before you just, you know, just act on it. And that's, and that's where I think a lot of my self growth as has come from that I, I now, I now want to plan, perform and deliver at a level now that I didn't, I didn't know existed. You know, and then sometimes it doesn't happen, sometimes I don't get it. Like I've planned it, I get halfway through performing it and it turns to shit. But with the mindset that I have now, I'm able to adapt and still create a better outcome. Whereas in the past I wouldn't even have fucking bothered to plan because I knew it would have turned to shit because I didn't have the right mindset, I didn't have the right energy, I didn't have the right know how, the skills, the tools or you know, or knowledge to, you know, to make it happen. So you know, I keep saying to myself, now I will never, ever, ever live to work anymore. I'm going to work to live. And that's whether it's to do with service, you know, self, family or service. I'm going to work to live. You know, you want it, you want to, you want to live and take everything you possibly can into, you know, into Your into your life. Not just, not just grind every day.

Yeah, agreed, man. And look what Naz has shared as well. Guys is awesome on the tools and some examples but we look at this from three areas like your foundations. So a foundational approach on rebuilding who you are and getting your battle ready. Because you're right, Naz, there's always something around the corner. It's not something we welcome or even anticipate at times. You don't need to always focus our pink elephant like just small point. Okay, cool. I've got to be aware. But because you develop, you know the strength and the steel to handle it, it's not something you have to always think about. But there is always something that can put us in a position where we are tested. But then you have from a foundational point of view, we move into strategies which is then coupled with the tactics. So that's when we zoom right in. Okay, well this is our strategy around this that we can now attack and get after because of the foundations we've built. And these are the tactical things that we're going to do which make up the strategy in this order and that. So those three things which I've never really spoken about but that's, that's the zoom out and zoom in and I guess I just want to share one with the guys and get Terry on me Nez, but I'm going to share one of yours. Yesterday I just thought it was a man. It blew me away as it did. The comments and the guys were unbelievable. And I'm actually going to do a screen share for those who watch the video as well. But this is on a tactical approach.

This nugget, this is, this is one.

Of the greatest doing post it notes and to papa, love you so much. To the moon and back. Nadia, your daughter which is the same age as Stella and I'm just going to read this out for you, Naz. One of my biggest wins so far tribe this morning, getting to work and opening my folder that carries my journal and planner, I found this little Note from my 6 year old daughter, Nadia. Alex is right. Our children don't just listen, they watch. And our habits and actions have a huge effect on their lives. I just called Rose to speak to Nadia to ask why she wrote the note and her reply made the lip wobble. Papa, when you put notes in my lunchbox it makes me feel so good. And I see mama's big smile when she reads hers in the morning. And I wanted you to feel good like you do to us feeling on Top of the world right now. Yeah, that's. That's unreal, man.

Wobble, man.

Our children, they are.

Yeah, she. Look, she took my breath away yesterday. Brought him. And when I. When I picked her up after school to take. Take the service hat off and put the dance dad hat on. Oh, man. When I embraced her and thanked her for it. Yeah. Moments like that is what life's all about. You know, that. That was extremely special for me. And you know, just. Just to see the fruits of your labor and. And what I'm trying to provide for the girls now that proof is now in the pudding. Fuck. What can you ask, you know, what can you ask in life to have that? You know, one of the comments that I left there talking with one of the boys after sharing that was I actually do now know what proper true happiness means or feels like. It's a different level, man. Totally different level. We can have everything in the world. We can have it like the world's our oyster, you know, and the opportunities are endless. But true happiness is in those small 1 percenters, those things that no money can buy. And when you have, when you get opportunity like that, especially to see that what you're implementing and what you're, what you're putting out and what you're giving, the opportunity you're giving your children to learn from. Yeah, that's. That's. That's where the big wins are. That's where the big wins are.

Yeah, man. Our children are a vehicle for truth, bro. Like he just happened. He's. He. I'll put it another way, fellas. Happiness cannot come without truth. You can't go watching some bullshit and go, that movie made me happy. What the. Do you mean it's fake? It's not real. It doesn't exist. It was in a studio. You cannot. It's impossible to have happiness without truth. They go hand in hand. So. I feel you, man. I get what you're saying. And I didn't read this last part, but actually, well, because. Quite a good motivational piece for you men listening. For any new tribesman, the road is tough and sometimes feels like there is no end in sight. Stick to your plan and keep persisting on doing those good habits. And your happiness and love is closer than what you think. And it's so true, man. Like a lot of the new members and I try and explain this to them, especially when they're in a time sensitive position. Look, what you want won't happen as quickly as what you want it to, but it'll happen Quicker than you think. And that. That is different. Like, I know that sounds like it's the same thing and it seems to contradict itself, but it's not. Get down, get to work. Let's start fucking taking action. You've put all this energy and time into fucking destroying things up. Try. Lick your fingers, right? It'll turn around.

Yeah.

Why wouldn't you put the same effort in? You've put all that effort in.

You know, time to grind, you know, get down and get dirty.

Absolutely. But, yeah, man, what I mean, that was. That was so cool, because I love the poster note is such a beautiful, simple thing.

One of the little nuggets that all us men in the inside use to.

Yeah.

To give us some Browning points, you know, with. With the white. With the missus and. And the kids and. Yeah, look, it's. Yeah, all these little things have just changed. Changed the whole. Whole outlook on life, man, you know, that we take. Sometimes we just take for granted this. The small things, things that. That you just think they're just going to stay there and be there until they're taken away from you, you know, and realize. Realize the pain you're putting yourself and everyone through, man. It's. It can be tough and can be overwhelming, but it's. It's. It's how we. It's how you decide to progress. And like you said with, you know, with foundation and, you know, and where we set. Where we set our goals. It's challenging. Like, it is challenging, but the reward in it is next level. You know, you've got to take it. You got to take these opportunities. Like we talk about, you know, MBOs and then our ROIs return on investment. If we work hard and we keep working hard at it, things will turn around, things will change, you know, like going back from the start. And I was getting up in the morning and, you know, like, I felt like. I felt like a chooch, man. I didn't know what I was doing. I was like, what's going on? What are they talking about? Breath, work, meditate. I don't fucking meditate. You know, I'm a man. Then all of a sudden, I didn't. I had no idea what the fuck I was doing. I was getting up in the morning, I was going outside, watching that sunrise, sitting there, getting that new. That new energy, the new day's energy. Start to breathe in through the nose, power back out through the nose. And all of a sudden, after four or five days, I was just like, hang on a minute. I've got this Newfound focus. Things are starting to come along. You know, I'm starting to think about, plan my day differently. Started doing some stretching in the morning, and all of a sudden I had a little bit more energy to start my day instead of getting to work and, you know, being a bit hunched over or feeling those little niggling injuries from past, you know, from past, past neglect and going for a walk in the mornings. And then all of a sudden I started to see. And I still, I still. Well, I don't think I'll forget this for the rest of my life. Could hear footsteps coming down the stairs and it was Rose. She's decided to go for a walk in the morning now, you know, so all of a sudden I'm like, the things that I'm doing, this is where people are starting to catch on. People are starting to see that I am being better and I am getting better and I am creating a better life for my family. And they're jumping on board now. So where that, where there was that massive wall because of what I'd done with hard work and persistence and patience, that wall starts to get broken down and, you know, if. If you're lucky enough to have to have opportunity to reconcile, you know, your relationship, your marriage, like, like I have been. Yeah, man, when you, when you get, when you see these little, these little wins and you start getting better communication and getting that little, you know, spontaneous, flirtatious look back, coming back at you, all of a sudden, you slow, you know, you start buzzing again, man. You feel young again, you feel alive again. And it's all due to you being the man that they deserve. You know, it's simple. There's no, there's no, there's no, there's no magic potion to it. You're just stepping up to the plate, man. You're being the man that they deserve, you know, to have lead. Lead them.

Yeah, so, yeah, definitely, man. Yeah. Like, I, I can do a podcast and give you guys like 150 tactical things that we do in HPF, but who and where is it coming from? You know, like, even these post it notes, I did some for the kids the other day and I've got my own from Stella. And it's just, I love you, dad, because I called her Stella Bella, you know, and, you know, wreck it Roman, because he destroys everything, but look at.

The DNA he's got. Look at the DNA he's got. He's gonna be a force to be reckoned with.

Good with soccer. I played soccer since I was like 2 and because I was so big, they got me in the under sixes. Probably couldn't now, but back in the day you could. So I played three years in the under 6s before I was actually 6. So by the time I was in under sixes, man, and obviously I've got a bit of a memory. Dad has a better memory than me because, you know, he was what, 36 at the time? But yeah, man, he reckons I'd score like 8, 10 goals a game, just destroy everyone because of my size, speed and skill. But Roman loves soccer, so I think I'll push that on. But. But it's just, you know, that I look at this post it note, I love you, dad pad, and it's got like 20 fucking X's and O's and big love hearts. And like, she wouldn't have written that just because I wrote her post it note. It's because of who I am and my relationship and connection to her. And then me doing the post note, just like Rose coming down the stairs becomes symbolic of leadership and an attractive thing because of what you said. And it all comes. This is the crazy part. We talk about facts so much and taking actions, but everything in this world is driven by emotion. The hard part is people get caught up in a false or an influenced emotion that doesn't have great interest at heart for them and those they love and care about, or they're not recognizing and identifying the future emotions or facts that will create the better feelings or emotions and then focusing on that, hey, if I just triple down and stick to this, this is. This is the outcome and this is what will happen. And. And it's about finding that for you too, Naz. Like, it's what it means to you, man. Like meditation, right? Like, I'll jump in the sauna, put on some nice slow 432hz music and just relax. I mean, that could be meditation. Yeah. People could say gym session is going with a whole bunch of juice. Junkies are doing one rep max deadlift. Gym is gym. So everyone has their own interpretation of what it means is finding, like, breath work. Like breathing, man, is probably the most debilitating thing humans are doing wrong right now. Where on the flip side, it's one of the most unbelievable practices just to breathe properly. Even at the point where at night, and it's just something I've had for a long time, my nose gets a little bit more blocked up. I've started using nose strips at night just to lift the skin a little bit. Breathing through the night, man. My deep sleep. I haven't had over two. You should have like three to four. I haven't had over two hours because I track my sleep. I haven't had over two hours of deep sleep since Stella was born, like seven years. Crazy. Put these on in three nights. Straight away, 2 hours and 23 minutes and I'm waking up filled with energy, pumping and so little things like that. It's finding works for you. But all of these tactics come from foundation. And that's the craziest part, isn't it, man? It's, it's always like we'll continue to evolve who and what we are with hpf, but the fundamentals never change, man.

No.

Four pillars, Alignment, energy, immersion, performance. The immersion is critical the tribe. You must have accountability because when you don't want to answer to yourself, it serves you best to answer to those who know yourself and who you are. And they, they know what's right for you as well. That's, that's, that's so undervalued in the modern world. Yeah.

And that's the power of the tribe, man. That is the power of the tribe. Like you, you know, understandably, we all, we're from all walks of life and we're from all parts of Australia and you know, and credit to hbf, man, now, you know, we're taking on the world. So we've got fathers from, you know, from other, other, other countries and it's, it's an honor to obviously get knowledge from them and their walks of life. But inevitably we're all strangers, man. Really, we're all strangers. But the power that you gain from the tribe, that there is, you know, there's no bullshit tolerance within, within it. And where there's no judgment, there's no bad or negative energy or attitude.

You'Re.

Just given a position to win and that becomes infectious when you take that on board. You then take that on board in your everyday life where you just want to win. You want to, you want to, you want to win for yourself, you want to have those wins for your wife, you want to have those wins for your children. You just want to be better in general. And you, that's, that's that power of the tribe. It's. I can't. I, I really can't. I feel like I'm, I'm undercooking it for how amazing it is, man. You know, is it. You be.

You're right. Strangers, man. Like we, but here we are, we do a Victorian catch up, everyone's high fiving, hugging like they've done each other for years. That was exactly like Kosciusko, you know, like there's. Out of Victoria there would have been maybe six guys that I've met before in person. The rest, that other 20 odd, I never met before in person. Yet you were part of that. I mean, what was that like, man? I know we spoke a little bit before we hit record, but. Yeah, the Victorian catch up. What, what was that like seeing these.

Guys after I asked the, the waitress to go get me a step ladder so then I could embrace you.

I just migrated from Amesbury and the other boys, there was probably four or five of you.

Yeah, I mean me and Ames, mate, we were hand, we were just side by side like two little midgets.

But.

Nah man, like that, that's, that's the, the power of what you get. I embraced, I embraced those guys like I embraced friends that I've grown up with and that's, that's the respect.

And.

The energy that you get from a high performing father. Full stop, you know? Yeah, it was just, it was, it's really unexplainable the, the energy that, that, that we got from the vic catch up. I, I honestly can't explain it man, because it's, it's something that I've never experienced. You know, talking with statesman, the legend that is Pete Dunlop and just taking a minute to just hear his story and what he shared and you know, the tough roads that he faced growing up to the man he is now. You know, like seeing him and Chris Madden, they're training, pushing each other to extreme levels at the age that they are and the accountability that they were showing and putting across to us younger guys, man, look, that's next level. You take all that into account and the emotion and the feelings and what you get from it, like I said, it's, it's unexplainable. You can't, you can't, you can't put a, a number or a price on, on that kind of experience, man. It's, it's amazing.

Pretty crazy too, man. Like even, even Pete, I should get him on again. Like, you know, it's, I, I can't even fathom it, but. Lost his mum when he was 15, his father when he was 18. Like you, happy 18th birthday. You've got zero parents, you know, and I know they're a kid. There's always someone who, who has it perceivably better or worse than us in life. But being so close to us and Pete being an original member is the Fifth man to ever join us.

I still remember. Yeah, you said number five. Number five on the list. You know there's membership number five number.

Yeah, yeah. For him, for him to go through that man life without any of that guidance because you know, like you still talk to your father, my father, like you, you still see throughout their phases and stages, you know, not what's to come, but you can see the different stages of life. And for Pete to have that and then become a father so late, you know, in his late 40s, he's in his 50s now, but you know, it's, it's incredible how, how unique but then how similar we are as men with some of the challenges we face and, and some of the pathways to, to getting that power back and getting on top again. And when you have that remembrance with other men, other tribesmen, it's really inspiring. Even if they don't acknowledge it like you, Naz, you're becoming very quickly a very high level leader inside of HPF where even if men haven't sent you a personal message saying, hey, thank you man for that post or that poster note from your daughter was amazing, or you know, it's, it's, it's that ripple effect that's impacting, influencing even men listening to this subconsciously, you know, you will pluck something out in six days time. But I mean when you were sharing one of the men, we don't have to say his name, one of the members was talking about how much you're, you're giving him hope and, and you.

Know, yeah, that was that like goosebumps, man. Like, you know, not. It was, it was great to meet, it was great to meet the other Vic dads. But at the end of it, after we had our, you know, our mindset session and our training session all together and the high fives and the hugs and the, you know, we went out for, we went out for a bit of breakfast together and kind of just mellowed down. We're all riding an absolute massive wave of, you know, of emotion and we were saying our goodbyes and, or having that last five minute chat with, with each other and, and one of the fathers came up and, and said to me, you know, I'm, I'm expired. I'm inspired by you and the level that, yeah, the level that you're at and, and what your, what you're giving, what you're giving to, to us as fathers on the inside. I'm very inspired by your shares and your videos and what you bring to the table and you know, and he said, sometimes it's actually maybe a little bit intimidating for me because, you know, I haven't fully immersed myself in, you know, in giving, you know, in sharing and doing videos and things like that. So that, that for me was, you know, probably the cherry on top for the vic catch up to know that, you know, the changes that I'm making in my life is helping. Is helping other fathers, helping other men. You know, no one, no one deserves to go things alone, to go about things alone, or to think they have to do it alone. There is no, There's no, there's no judgment in asking for help, Alex. Like, you know, we're all human beings and if we, if we take a minute to learn from each other, can be about anything, we're all going to be better for it. So, you know, to any, Any. Any fathers out there listening, you know, get off. Let's get off our high horses, man, and just be open. Open to the process, open to listening to, you know, to other fathers. And don't be afraid to say, look, I think I'm fucking up. I don't think I'm heading down the right road. I need help. There's nothing sad about that, man. It's honorable that you're acknowledging that and you want to be better. So, yeah, seek help. And gonna put. I'm gonna put a bit of a shout out, seek help. It's called high performance. Father CEOs Alex Ranieri, he's. It's. Yeah, no, just look in whatever, whatever, whatever you, whatever seats, you know, fits your bill for seeking help. But there is no, it's not. It's not a crime to seek help. We just. Because we're mentioning, and it's in our DNA, that, that we have to. We have to be that, you know, that shut down lockdown. Strong man. Take it from a guy that's been staring down the battle and giving up on, on everything that there is no shame, only gains in putting yourself out there.

So, yeah, man, and we're not here just to patch things either. Like, I want a lot of men listening who, you know, aren't members at this stage to just understand. We're not here to patch things or try and, you know, just fix you up and you'll be okay. We're here to challenge you in a genuine way so you thrive. We want you to be an animal, man, like just an absolute weapon in life. Dominating. It's not. Hey, I've got this couple of things I'm ashamed of. Yeah, cool. Let's the first thing to correcting course Correction, building version 2.2.0 is 100%. Let's get clear on the facts, the truth, and let's use that to then harness that competitive drive and that nature to get out, get after it, and fucking win. But it's not just, hey, I just want to get back to one. It's like, no, no, man. Like, we're gonna take you up to version 2.0. You might feel like version 0.1 at the moment. I get that. Don't worry. We'll. We'll help you fix that first. But then, yeah, this is something that we are taking you to a level that you have not seen or believed to be possible. And then when you see that, you do believe it. And then it. Like we said, MBOs, momentum building opportunities, they just build and stack on top of each other, you know? And. I don't know, like, men. Men seem to think a lot of people do, but. But men in particular, Naz, we seem to think that we have more time than we do, but it's like, how much control over the thing is. How much control do you have of a thing over the thing that you think you have more time on? Because if it's inside of your marriage, at best you've got 50. 50, right. So you think you have more time in a situational circumstance, you don't actually. 100 control. So what the are you thinking? You know, it's. It's madness. And that's the toughest part, man, is we, like, oh, man, it's. It's tiring, bro. Like, I, you know, and that's. It's just my. And not that I'm saying I'm special, but it's obviously my. My cross to bear, but, man, some of the messages, all avenues, social media, Instagram message, it could be a comment, it could be emails. Like, it's not just guys booking in calls and. And breaking down, sharing the stories. There are some men who reach out and it's just fucking heavy stuff, man.

Yeah.

And I look at this, I'm like, man, I could. Been around five years now. Like, the amount of money we spend on advertising to spread. Just to spread the message, just to. Just to build that idea and understanding of hope and opportunity. Why'd you fucking wait? Why did you wait so long? And then you pass that point of no return. Like, we. We're not fucking magicians. We do some amazing things and. And it's epic in how we assist and guide the man, but can't turn back time.

Naz no, no, it's one thing that you, that we can't, that we can't get back. We can't, we can't get back. But yeah, being present and focusing on the now has been a. Has been a big, big help, I suppose, in, in getting, in getting clarity and finding peace, you know, with, with the past and up. But you, you've got it, You've got to grasp it. You've got to take it by the balls, man. There's no, there's no, there's no two ways about it. You gotta, you've got to, you've got to. You're only going to get what you give. And unless we're, unless we're willing to give 100%, well, fuck. Should you expect anything else from, from anyone else. Sometimes we forget that, I think.

And yeah, and when we talk about, you know, the one thing you can't get back is time with people, guess who the number one person is that you won't get time back with Yourself.

That's right, man.

And it's seasonal, man. Like we all have the ups and downs. I'm coming off the back of probably a six month chronic illness. Really? Yeah. Which still is 100. That's why I was another sort of week and a half between podcasts after I. I'm back. Where's Algon? But I wanted to make sure I didn't blow anything out because of the Victorian trip. I wanted to make sure I gave that my all. And we were yelling, man, sometimes in that, in that restaurant at night time. That was a small little room for 18 large men ripping in as.

That's the first time you've said I was large, man.

Yeah, large in heart, man. Yes. No, but it's, but it is seasonal, man. Like we all have the ups and downs, which is great. Like a lot. Most of our members, all of our members listen to the podcast as well. So this is a call to arms for some of our members on the inside as well. You feel like you stagnate a little bit, man. All good. Pull your finger out. Let's go. Let's go again. Let's go again. But you know, isn't it crazy, Naz, if, you know, when you look at the ripple effect of life. If I didn't have Italian last name, your papa wouldn't have let you join?

Hell no, man.

That's so funny. I just need to master Italian and then we'll go over in Italy, man, and we'll be, we hope, the Italians.

Yeah, let's take, let's take it on the road, man.

The offshore Italian.

Let's take another road. 100%.

It's been an honor, man. Thank you for. For also choosing me and us and the tribe to be part of your life and your journey, mate. It really has.

Nah, look, Alex, I can't. From the bottom of my heart, I can't thank you know, yourself, the coaches, Zach, Ben, Drew, everyone, everyone. Luke. Like I said that. That I still think of that conversation I had with Luke. Word for word, man. I can't thank you guys enough for giving me this opportunity to create a better life for myself and to inspire my wife and my two beautiful daughters and giving them life that they deserve. I've put myself in a position where I've. I've never been so happy, and it's infectious and it's addictive, and I want more. And I have no one else to thank but HBF and all it provides. And to the other amazing fathers that are involved in it, I can't express the love and gratitude I have towards each and every single one of you that I've connected with. And then I'm truly grateful for everything that I learn and I get from you guys. And I want to keep. I want to keep keeping on, man, with hbf. And I only hope that I can give as much as what I'm getting out of. Out of out of the program. So thank you.

So goodness. Yeah, especially with the two daughters, mate. Like, I've got two daughters as well, and we can't raise our daughters. Like, no man can raise his daughter on how to be a woman because we're not women. No, what we can do is model and what they should look for in a man, and that's just as important.

Bro, don't go here, man. This is gonna. He's gonna just. He's gonna ruin me. Like, I knew we were gonna get here sooner or later. I kept trying to dodge it, man.

That's all good. So we'll change gears and we'll talk about the. You get special if you get three cartons of peaches. We get Nonna's posada at the back. Her and the girls are making it right now as we speak.

Week.

Homegrown tomatoes. You've really opened your heart, bro, and it's. It's great to see. I appreciate you, man, and like I said, humbled to be part of your journey, and I hope this is serving you men well. Who are listening, member or not, to first identify inside of yourself that, yeah, we all have issues. We all have problems and challenges. This is the. The ebb and flow of life. The problem isn't the problem you face. The problem is you not fucking doing anything about it at the end of the day. And credit to you, Naz, for standing up and being a true leader, man, and. And doing something about it. And, you know, I can't wait to see what the rest of the year unfolds with as well as the. The years to come.

That's it, man. Gains nothing but. Gains nothing but growth, brother.

Good on you, man.

All the best.

Well, that wraps up another episode. And just as we wind this down, I want you to just reflect and think back through some of the golden nuggets, some of the re. Some of the sore points, some of the things that might have hit home with you, and then just look at ways that you can apply a different set of actions to change your position, change your circumstances, change your feelings, and change the facts. These episodes are done with your best interest at heart, and there's always something we can get from that. Maybe it's not the first time, maybe it's the second time. We've had members listen to episodes four or five times and then it finally clicks. But each either way, I hope you got a lot of value out of this. And also, if this is something that you really want to solidify inside of your life, repetition is the key. You've listened to it. Write down your revelations, think about them, read them, speak them, believe in the changes that you will carve out in the action plan of those revelations to create change in your life and then share that. And when you teach, you learn the second time, right? So teaching and showing this to others you love and care about is the greatest way that you can can remember and make sure you consistently learn and relearn what is it's true and what is it is important to you in your heart. Take care. Have an amazing day, night, weekday weekend, and I'll see you for another one soon. Cheers.