254. The Battle Within That All Men Face

If this is something that you're really starting to resonate with and you've racked up five, 10, 15, maybe 20 podcasts by now, I just want to ask a small favor of you. The greatest way that we create the greatest impact inside of this world is by reaching more people and more people really tying into the value they can offer themselves at a fundamental level. HPF stands for fathers really valuing and believing in themselves and investing in themselves so that they and their family wins. A couple of quick things. I hope you enjoy the episode ahead. It's a phenomenal one that we've just recorded for you, but essentially I'd love for you to give us a review. Obviously a five star review would be amazing, but whether it's itunes, Spotify, Amazon, it could be on Facebook, a Facebook review anywhere, Google, anywhere where you see this value in you giving us the approval and recognition that will spread this message. Much respect. Really appreciate you for doing that and also sharing this with someone who you know would get a huge benefits out of listening to this as well. So enjoy the episode ahead. But if there's just one thing I could ask for 10 to 30 seconds of your life to give back. I love doing these episodes. I do these for you, member or not, and for the wider community. I'd love it if you could just give a little bit back and really promote that you support this and this is something that you would love to share with others who you know would get value out of this as well. The battle within. The battle within that all men face. Welcome to a pretty special episode. It's been a couple of minutes. Apologies for the delay. Been busy, been busy traveling around the east coast and serving many fathers and families. I might add to that though, with Brisbane coming up, it's going to be an unbelievable event. It really is. It really is looking forward to. It's probably going to be three times the size as the other events and pretty crazy what's happened. I mean, if it's one thing that the cyclone Alfred's not so much taught but reminded us all of, it's that life can throw you more, more than just curveballs, especially when you least expect it. And you know, as a special offering for those who are either in the Southeast Queensland area or willing to travel, we're actually partnering up with Give It a beautiful charity and foundation that we're going to be donating 100% of the ticket fee. Also discounting that ticket fee by 80% for those that are interested. If you are interested, strongly urge that you Come there's not limitless. Tickets will be at the Brisbane Convention Exhibition Centre. But it's not gonna be limitless. Pretty powerful, powerful workshop. It's a four hour workshop which I'm gonna give you little, little bits and pieces. Little bits and pieces today. I'd like to share that with you but strongly urge that you come. This is not something that I do every month. We do it once a year. So Sydney's already done, Melbourne's already done, Brisbane's 29 March. So some of you will be listening to this and that will have already been done. Looking at WA in June as well, which should be unbelievable. But all of your ticket fee goes towards those that are desperately in need of rebuilding. Even if the storm wasn't that bad, quote unquote was bad enough. But the flooding is just horrendous for many people. So we're going to be donating 100% of that as well as giving you guys 80% off. If you want to come or if you want to bring a friend with you as well and not only pour back in your own cup where maybe this was the icing on the cake for you, maybe it wasn't. But the cake that has layers with stress, work pressures, connection with your wife and children. I'm trying to juggle it all and trying to maintain your own physical and mental sanity. Mental sanity, physical performance, to be able to produce in life. It's a tough game. It's a tough game, but I just want to throw that out there, you know. Not that I'm looking for some sort of charity tickets. Hey, good on you, Al. It's like, oh man, fuck. That's the least we can do, right? We're all for the community and all for fathers and families. If you haven't figured that one out yet, let me just remind you of it. But look, it's been a little while. Been focusing on the physical events. Huge things in the pipeline. Huge things in the pipeline, man. Some of the upgrades. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. Pretty cool stuff. Pretty cool stuff. We've got cozy later this year which depending on how much we can take over Lake Crack and back is going to be also three times, maybe four times the size of what it was last year. That was an epic, epic documentary. But again, just coming back to that, if you want to look into the event, pretty simple. Www.highperformancefather.com live or live. The theme is live your legacy, but it's spelled the same but highperformancefather.com live and then jump in you can see all the details there. If something you want to or bring a friend to, it's just blown people away. And it's not just because of me speaking on stage. It's got nothing to do with that. It's how we just take these men through the process of giving them the tools they need to be successful in life. Even some of our members that have come to these to really reiterate and reinforce the path that is tried, tested and true and will stand the test of time, regardless of what era we enter into with hpf. Far outliving me and those that are listening to this podcast, whether it's women or children listening to this as well. I had a great one of our members. This is a shout out to Matty Lehman. What an absolute champion and his young bloke. This is a shout out to you as well, young man, because you'll be listening to this too. Matt Lehman connects with his son on the drive to school and his son's chosen to invest in himself and his relationship with his father to listen to these. Instead of catching the bus and fooling around or not hanging out with his mates, he's spending time in the car where he and his father, Matt, is one of our HPF tribesmen who's crushing goals at the moment. Well done, mate. I'm very proud of you. It was great to connect with you down in Melbourne. They will go through and listen to a portion of the podcast and then they'll dissect it and talk about it. I can't stress this enough for you, young man. Like, I think you're of age, from memory that dad was telling me and sharing how proud he was of you. This is an unbelievable platform for you. You have no idea how much is going to help you in your life, but that's exactly the point. To give you the tools and to give you the subconscious elements that are going to be banked inside of your head, your heart, your soul, to know exactly what's possible in your life and to have the runs on the board on how to do it, not only through your father's example, but absolutely through your own. Because if you can take this now, you won't have to go through what so many men go through in the journey of life and beyond that, because life is about adversity. You should challenge yourself, whether it's physical, in the gym, testing yourself, diving into business with dad, whatever it might be, you should always be challenging and testing yourself. But if you can do that within an environment that is not as traumatic as the unexpected events that turn through the course of time that people just spend being stagnant in life, you will win. Did I need nine operations through a professional rugby league career to learn valuable lessons about resilience? No, I didn't. People say it's made you who you are today. To that I say, yeah, maybe, maybe not. Maybe the plant was seeded before the seed was planted before that. Which is the reason why I went from nothing to being a first grade footy player in 18 months. So maybe I already had the drive, maybe already had the resilience. Because I got to tell you now, not to toot my own horn, but that's likely not really possible in almost any sport and not really a common thing, given that I was raised with soccer and cricket. So proud of you, young man. Well done. Keep it up. Your old man's definitely got your best interest at heart and it's fantastic to have you as part of this. Just turn, turn a blind eye, turn a blind ear to when you hear the occasional swears, but that's obviously something that is driven through a high level of passion of myself, the battle within that all men face. The reason why I just wanted to preface that. Is one up and coming. Brisbane would be awesome for you to come and join us. But two? Yeah. Young men could be listening to this. Men who are not fathers could be listening to this. There are women and wives who listen to this to understand what's going on. This is something that really is a challenge for everyone in life. But no more so than a man. Why? Because as a man with continued responsibilities, he becomes a father and provider for his family and his titles keep racking up. You're not just a son, a cousin, a brother, a nephew. You're a father, you're a husband, you're a leader in society. You're a business owner or not, or a worker or colleague or employee. Like your. Your hats keep stacking up. This is not to the detriment of women or children. It's just understanding that the number one person who needs to be needs to be. It's. You can't even avoid it. Women can get away without being accountable. That's why they are the way they are. The beautiful gift that they are. Men we can't hide. Women hold a level of value that isn't always necessarily fought for. You know, whether it's their beauty, their looks, their nature, the feminine energy that brings the softness that men enjoy. Whereas for men, your. Your value is based on your merit and your merit day in and day out. And that might not be fair, gentlemen, but that is life. We talk about in HPF being a four to one man. Now I'm going to talk about that a little bit later. But yes, life isn't fair, but what are you going to do about it? Is my question. So when it comes to the battle within that all men face, what's really important is to know that everyone can face these battles. And it's the battle of growing or stagnating, staying the same and how to combat that. The reason why it's so important for men and fathers is because nothing contrasts or exposes this battle of whether you're winning it or losing it more than you, your role and who you are to others around you. And that battle within really is this, this state of growing and settling. Growing or settling, not growing, just settling, all of it. I grow, then I settle, I grow. I don't settle, I keep growing, I don't grow at all. I just settle, you know, like it's. It's tough, it really is. And you know, it's something that I feel like resilience is important, you know, and persistence, which has lots of resilience stacked up over time. Sure. But it is at times a tiring thing. This battle within that all men face is the one of looking at the two, almost the two entities that come together as one, like the wolf you feed and the wolf you don't, you know, and there's some old Chinese parables I think, about that sort of stuff, but it really is a solid battle. There is part of us that doesn't really want to push hard, doesn't really want to fight for what we just want to relax, kick back, and I'll get straight to it. There are two things that come together that create this existence in life. There's the man. And that man wants to survive. He wants to procreate and continue the existence of his species. And that's it. The man in us, you might have camaraderie and tribes and laughter and all these little things that make you human, sure. But in essence, the man in us just wants to do only what's in front of him, only what's required to simply survive, procreate, live and then die. And you get that, right? I've got that in me. We've all got that in us. We've had a big day out, going off hunting or working or doing whatever it is that we're doing. And then we want to come home and like the, like the lazy lions who've got a belly, 40 pounds of meat, and we just want to kick back and relax and lay under the safari tree. And which is. This is why relationship's so important with. With women being as feminine and soft as possible, because life will harden women naturally anyway, over time. We want our sanctuary. A man wants a kingdom where he can be at peace. Not hassled, not, not heckled or haggled or whatever it is that needs to be done like that, but also the responsibilities on the man. What have you done? Have you frontloaded? What have you done to create the conditions where you're putting the mind and the heart of your wife at ease? And you are a man who is a man of his word and does what he says he will do and follows through. It's a very first value in hbf. Be a man of your word. But we have that in us. So there's the man who just wants to do only what he needs to, to provide, to survive, to procreate, to live and to die. And there's nothing wrong with that. That's a pretty important. If you can harness that in the right way. It's a beautiful tool for rejuvenating the other end of this, which I'll discuss in a second. The opposite side. But it's a beautiful tool for rejuvenation. We are humans, so we do have an animal element to us, obviously. We've got our five senses. Touch, taste, sight, smell, sound. And as organic creatures, as organisms, we're here to follow the path of least resistance. It's literally how the brain operates as well. The brain operates as an efficiency machine. So, you know, 20% of your calories, I believe, is your brain power, that's huge. This is why when it comes to leadership, articulation and helping people, if you're connected to the croc brain and any perception of threat comes in, whether it's this person scares me, I'm in fear of my life, or this is boring, I can't connect. These words don't make sense. Like if there's something in this podcast that wouldn't click with you, eventually you tune off about nap and then you click off. Why? Because your brain is focusing, working so hard, the croc brain, just to pay attention, hoping that's not the case. Some of these episodes go over an hour. This one won't. But that is a natural part of us as human beings. We're on the path of least resistance. Account just a man. So there's the man that contains the spirit, but then there's the Spirit of a man. So there's the spirit of a man and then there's the man that embodies the spirit and that is the up. That is the equal opposite. This is like the ultimate dichotomy or contradiction in life. It's so funny. You've got the man who contains the spirit, this being, this organism, this animal. I just want to go out, I just want to hunt. I just want to lay under the tree. I just want to kick back, relax and cruise. And then this, if you're not careful, becomes a suffocating cancer. It becomes a disease, it becomes a toxin that then creeps out and up and into the spirit of you. And the next thing you know, you are dead. You just haven't been buried yet. And I look out over the world and I look at all these different people I've had conversations with. So many, so many thousands, thousands. There's just nothing behind those eyes. Guilt, shame, holding onto the past. Every minute in the past costs you a minute in the future. Why so much waste? Yet here you are. You're dead. You just haven't been buried yet. I'm hoping it's not our listeners, I really am. You don't need join HPF to have these breakthroughs or these lessons or to learn something or remember something. But I tell you what. Your environment matters, but you've got the man that contains the spirit. And this man, he has his place. He does have his place in this world and in your life. But then you've got the spirit of the man. And that is the opposite. The spirit of the man, that is your real consciousness, that is your real being. That is how and who you are living life through, through the eyes of this being that has then entered itself into the human meat sack that we are to experience life in the human element. I'm not here to preach religion or God or any other thing onto you. Universal energies and blah, blah, blah. But you can't deny that. You cannot deny that you have a conscious. Like if you can be consciously aware of your thoughts, then what is that? It's about zoom. It's almost like you're zooming out in third person view and analyzing and observing yourself. Who is that? That's not the human, that's not the animal. So you've got the man that contains the spirit, but you've got the spirit of a man. It's just screaming to grow. I just want to live life. I want to grow and become the greatest I can be. I want to take risks. I want to take Chances you can't have the good without the bad, man. I'm not saying you need to walk up and down like a heartbeat, you know, and have ultimate highs and ultimate lows. But I'll tell you what. A lot of the different traumas, five core ones throughout my life, wouldn't have been possible if I wasn't stretching and growing and wouldn't have come through the other side if I wasn't stretching and growing. And that's who you need to listen to. That's who you need to pay attention to more. The spirit that is containing and living the human experience. This is really important, men. Every now and then when I'm driving home from the gym, I'll drive, pull into the. Pull into the cemetery and just sit and park and look out there. Some of these dating back to the 1800s. Crazy stuff. Cemetery already gone, already done. One day I'll be dead, so will you. And within a hundred years of me passing, less people live longer. Everyone that knew me will also be dead in a hundred years, maybe less. Isn't that something? So what can you do about it? Now that supersedes that trumps that, goes above and beyond just living as a man with quote, unquote feelings, which are sensations, which still feelings aren't in your heart. They're actually stimulated through your nervous system and your brain. You are more than that. You're so much more. How can you leverage the spirit in you to just be kicking and screaming and wanting? And there's nothing wrong with that in life. I want to win and I want more. One of our guys, Adam Marquez, he's a legend, you know, we call him Superman. He's like, I just want to win and I want more. Is there something wrong with that? I'm like, absolutely not. Don't you ever lose that. Don't you fucking dare. Don't you ever lose that ambition or that hunger. The only reason HPF exists is because at the core of it, that's exactly what was required and what was deep in my soul to make sure this made it through the rocky stages. 2018-2019-2020-2020. Like, it's been quite a journey, man. It really has. So I want you to sit there and understand that there's nothing wrong with you. This is a real thing. This battle within that we all face. It is absolutely real. Part of you just wants to kick back, become a consumer, become a slouch, be lazy, watch tv. Don't try and push hard in work, don't grow, don't develop, don't do more and you'll be right. It's like, where have we found our place in this world? Whether you've gotten a trade or not, you'll finish high school, then you dive straight into work. With work, whether it's trades or not, university or not, you're establishing yourself in a career. And then inside of that career, you'll then push to build yourself even further. Maybe, or maybe you won't. But what rate are you progressing? What is your rate of progression? What is your rate of improvement? And then it just becomes a volume game, just numbers. Okay, you hit your mid-30s, early-30s, mid-30s, late-30s. All right, cool. I just gotta work more hours, try and do more deals, Try and get a little bit more cream off the top and pay down that mortgage, pay down that home loan, provide for my family. I'm having more kids. My wife is stressed. I've got to keep her happy. Got to keep my kids happy. I'm not as fit as I used to be. Letting my myself go. I've just got to go into zombie motors. Need to become a vegetable. I just want to sit in front of the idiot box. That's my dad used to call it. Old man used to call it the idiot box. And guess what? He'd still sit in front of it. Crack me up, man. Couldn't call him out on it, though. He's got a bald, angry Italian with his. With his bowl of fruit late at night. He doesn't want anyone around. But that's. I'm not dissing my dad either. Like, he's worked very hard, Came home, just wanted to relax. But what are you doing on your personal development? What are you doing to feed the spirit in you? We have that in us. And then all of a sudden it could be 23, could be 28, could be 34, could be 41. It just stops. Why? Why do you stop? There's nothing wrong with you. It is a battle that you will face. It is a battle you'll continue to face. And the hardest part is getting it through your head that this is an infinite game. Like I said, it's the ultimate dichotomy of life. It's an infinite game until you breathe your final breath, and then it's done. You can't play life as a finite game because you could have another 40 years of that. That doesn't really feel very finite, does it? Doesn't feel very final. When you're year three into the next 40 years of your life, when you're year seven into the next 40 years of your life. So you need to build the mentality and be at peace with knowing that. This is an infinite game. This game just keeps going. There is no one pin drop. There is no one point of success. We spoke about this inside of the events that we run. Like, what is success? Look at that man. He's a success. What do you mean he's a success? A success at what, when, where, with who, why? Why is that the definition of success? Whereas for us, we understand that the game is infinite. We understand that it's a game you've just got to keep going at, but going and growing. Going and growing. I'll tell you right now, a lot of people say, I don't like change. Bullshit. You should love change. You should welcome it if you are behind the wheel, if you're driving it. I don't like change. I don't want to change. I don't believe in change. What do you mean? Change is inevitable in this life. Every single day brings change. And every single day is a gift. None of the tomorrows belong to you. You don't own any of them. Call it God, call it the universe. None of tomorrows belong to you. They belong to someone else. And every single day, guess what it's like, you walk up to a little ticket booth and you get your little ticket here's today, you get another today. And then tomorrow you walk up to your little ticket booth in your mind, as you wake up, you open your eyes, hey, congratulations, you get another day. Hey, congratulations, you get another day. Not you have to live today, you get another day. How dare you? Don't you dare fucking waste that. Don't you dare. So when we look at success, it's like, no, I don't want one point in success. I don't want one pin drop. I don't want to just be version 2.0. I don't want to just be version 3.0. I want to live a life that is successful. Our definition, high performance, Father, our definition of successful is this. Successful is a conscious advancement from where you are to where your next point of achievement in life is. So picture yourself, you're at the bottom of a mountain. Little stick drawing. Draw a line up to the top. Put a flag at the top of that mountain. Successful is a conscious, conscious advancement. It's not. Oh, shit. Fell into my lap. I just. Yeah, I did the same thing I did last year and I've earned X amount of money and I did this one holiday and I did it. It's like, no. How have you changed. How have you advanced? It's a conscious advancement from where you are, bottom of the mountain to where your next point of achievement is. This current mountain. There isn't one mountain. There isn't only one mountain. This is the next mountain. Your next point of achievement in life is pursued in a way such that by its distance closing and eventual attainment, your life and the lives of others you love and care about improves. That's the definition. That's what you must strive for in this infinite game until your final breath is drawn. Successful is a conscious advancement from where you are to where your next point of achievement in life is pursued in a way such that by its distance closing and eventual attainment, your life and the lives of others you love and care about improves. So when you realize this, men, you realize that this battle within is something that you will face for the rest of your life. But if you maintain the attitude mentality of wanting to be a successful man, with thousands and thousands of pin drops, little points of reference to drive, more courage and firepower, a few more cans of spinach to move ahead despite the circumstance being familiar or new, and to recollect your life and look back over the journey you've had and the impact you've had with people, yes, it is all about playing this infinite game. And as soon as you come to peace with that and know this battle within will never stop. The man that wants to be lazy, the spirit that wants to fly free, and this ultimate clash that happens every fucking day, as soon as you realize that's just part of the game, you're in front, you're already one up. And if you hold on to that with actions and facts, as the men that we are that drive change through leadership, you'll win. You really will. I promise you that, hand on heart. So we look out over our life and there's this battle within. And the sooner you can come to peace with it, the better. You are equipped to start moving forward and focusing on what you can do, what you can control getting out of the victim's seat and into the victor's seat. And being one who drives, drives his ship the way that he wants, where he wants to. You then start to look at, well, what do I actually want as a man? What am I looking for? And as men, we just want to know that we mattered. Women want to feel like they mattered. Men want to know with facts that they mattered. So we want to know with facts that we mattered. Why is this important? Why does this matter? Why is what I'm Sharing with you even mean anything. We all have this battle within our. Okay, cool. I get that. Got the man. You got the spirit of a man. Okay. They've got to fight each other. I want the spirit to win because I want to grow. Well, do you? And I'll tell you why you do. Because the man loses. You look at anything in this world, and it's not saying calling a spade a spade is a bad thing either. You can be a direct, factually, logically driven man, but if all you've relied on was just operating the way that a man does, you lose. Instead of being the spirit of a man that drives and instills that change inside of himself, the evolution, the growth for himself and others. If all you do is operate as a man, you will lose. You'll come into the fold like everyone else. You'll become an average man. 5 million fathers across Australia. I'm not average, Al. I'm above average. Is that some sort of flex? What does above average even mean? Who in their right mind in today's world would want to be just above average? And what are you measuring that against? Can you see the flaw in this argument? You're measuring yourself against average people. What a horrible game to play. Talk about putting the blinkers on. It's. Man. Fuck. Shut the gates, hpf. We're done. Let's wrap this company up. I've already achieved way more than what an average man would. I don't need to do anything anymore. That's it. We're done. Cool. Like, that's crazy. It's almost more dangerous. Think about everyone out there who's living an average life as a man who doesn't embody the spirit of the man that can actually thrive and create unbelievable change that lasts generation after generation. Your generational bloodline has gone on a completely different trajectory. You're measuring against average. Like, have a look at that for a second. Just. Just sit and reflect in this session and go, what am I really measuring against? And why does that even matter? Measuring against average is a fool's game. You are comparing yourself to someone who's already bowed out, already come in the fold. They've already sold. Whether they admitted or not, they have. And. And remember, if you. If we're looking at, like, the median, which is the average number or the average of something that's. That's being measured, and you want to find just a single, let's say 5 million fathers. What that means is, if we're talking in terms of not numbers, but standards and success, family solvent, Service. I'd say the average point would be, say, Father, Father. Four million. Father. 4,650,034. Cool. That's because I'm telling you now, average isn't two and a half million fathers. But let's say even if we did say that was two and a half million fathers instead of 4,800,000. Whatever I said earlier, let's say it is two and a half million. Okay? Let's work on the sweet spot in the middle. That means that father number 2,500,001 is above average. Tell me right now that you want the life of that man. You're above average. This is the craziest part. And then what's even, even more madness in today's society, especially in Australia, is that's coupled with. That's coupled with tall puppy syndrome. It's like you got these bums who have nothing that you want in life, and I don't know who they are. So when I say bums, it's the behavioral traits and character, not their identity. You can change your identity in an instant. You've got these guys carrying on like bums who are trying to pull you down. They've got nothing you want. They've got nothing that you're aspiring towards achieving. Zero influence on me. If you haven't worked that out from all the ads you've seen and the stuff that we cop. Horrible game to play. These men have already died. They just haven't been buried yet. That battle within, ah, they lost years ago. Years ago. Waving the white flag. Waving the white flag. I'm done. Battles. I don't want to do any more battles. Let's just concede, you can have the war. Life's okay. I'm a man. I've had babies, I make a bit of money. I'm alive, I can eat food. Yeah. The lasagna kid out of the freezer. And the chicken nuggets are good. We'll just defrost them and we'll chuck them in. Easy night. Easy night tonight. Hey, kids. Who wants to do pizza? Who wants to do pizza? It's okay to treat yourself just as long. Yeah. There's nothing wrong with having a treat. Yeah. A fucking daily treat. Yeah. I look at and it's not even just about health and fitness in that respect. It's just standards. All right? Value number three, perform with excellence in hpf. That's a type of standard. It's a level of standard. These men have had success in some stage of life, but they're not Successful. So I want you to understand. One, this battle is finite. It's never ending. Be at peace with that. Two, what do you actually want? You just want to know that you're mattered. If mattered means impregnating or having kids and providing a roof and shelter and surviving, of course. Those basics are fantastic. And we should have great humility and be thankful and grateful for the simple things in life. But that's not where you should end. Every single one of you has so much more to offer this world. You are here for a purpose. You have been given a purpose. Whether you've stopped listening, whether you've turned that voice down, whether you've walked into different rooms, whether you've knocked it out and tied them up almost like they're a hostage, and you've got them in the cabin. Like, you must listen to that little part inside of you. That little voice. My one's huge. Like, he's. That doesn't make me any better. It's just. It's like a muscle, right? I built a relationship with him. The spirit of Alan. He's like, al, mate, how are we gonna grow today? Hey, you just got punched in the face. Well done, mate. Hey, there's no blood. You'll be right up you. Off you go again. Hey, I guess. What, it's the 15th time you've been punched in the face. It's been two days. Congratulations. Let's go again. Like, it's. It's. Maybe I'm crazy, I don't know. But I really see that. I see the ambition and the hunger and the drive of men in hbf, and they've got that in them. They've got that. They've got that fucking mongrel. They've got that animal, and I love that. I love that. No discredit to women or kids. I'm not saying you have to be an animal. I'm just that that's the term that we're using for men to be. Yes. Yes. Not today. You wanna come at me? Okay, cool. Good luck. Not today. You will not take this day from me. And when tomorrow comes. Hey, not today either. Hey. I've spent half the day getting punched in the face and losing. But guess what? Not today. I've still got time. It's not midnight left. I will not stop. Hey, watch this space. Let me show you something. This is what I'm about to do here. Hey, look at what I just did. Hey. Even though today's been this. Look what I did there. Hey, you know how the first 12 hours of today was fucked. Well, look what I just did in the last hour. Look what I just did four minutes ago. I'm a winner. Good luck with that. Hey, you might have got yesterday, you're not going to get today, and you won't get tomorrow. And watch me. Try me. I remember. This is nothing, men. This is nothing compared to the dialogue both inner and whispered, the dialogue I had going when I was fucking Falling apart in 2023. Collapsed in the shower, trying to get steam and get something into my fucking lungs because my throat was shot to shit. Nothing was working. I couldn't breathe, couldn't exercise, couldn't walk. Wake up every fucking day, my wife's at me, and I'm doing the whole hands across the neck. Like I can't talk. You know, Hand across the neck. Hand across the neck, like, wake up every fucking day with 30 or 40 words before I started to get this fucking burn through my throat. And my wife's looking at me like I'm a fucking mute, going, hey, I'm your wife. I still need something. Understand you've got some sort of chronic illness that no fucking doctor has any answer on. But I'm a woman and I'm your wife, and I still need something. Because as humans, we're all fucking selfish creatures. And I don't blame her for that. That's her right. I'm her husband. But I couldn't fix it. Couldn't do anything about it. Couldn't even talk to my children. Couldn't sing them to bed every night like I used to. Having that dialogue going, heh, heh. Lap it up. Lap it up. I'll be back. I'll be back. You watch this space. I'll show you. I'll show you whether that's the devil, little voice inside that's negative, or what. The one thing men. Because the man was gone. He was fucking dying. The man in me. 2022, 2023, part of 2024. Wait. Fuck. He wasn't helping. He was pretty useless. That. That was the spirit inside. What you heard just then in the uptake in energy isn't some sort of fucking motivational speech. That was the spirit talking to you. What do we want? As men, we just want to know that we mattered. How can we know that we mattered? We've lived a successful life. How are we going to ensure that happens? Fellas, you don't have time. Whether you think you do or you don't, you are wrong. You know, I do have time. No, you don't. I don't have Time. No, you don't. You don't understand how. Less, how little. And maybe sometimes you do. That's what I mean when I say you're right or wrong. Hey, I don't have time. Well, maybe you got a little bit of time. Don't rush that. That's a foolish decision. Sit on that. Do some thinking. Time. Create some space here. This is the hard part. Like it's. It's. Most of the time you don't have the time, you think, but sometimes you do. Just. Just don't build the wrong machine. Make sure you're listening to the true, authentic version of yourself, not driving something out of fear. But one thing I've learned, and there's a big revelation I had with the team earlier this year, was the bigger you dream, the more you realize you're running out of time, the more you realize what little time you have. We've got very big goals and plans, hpf, and I just. I turned 40 this year, so. Wow. Where's the last seven and a half years gone, man. Where's q1? Q1, 20, 25 is coming to an end. Quarter one wrapped up. Wasn't it Christmas two weeks ago? No. Maybe. We're in the middle of March. Welcome. Crazy. Crazy. Why is this important? Coming back to the point I made about eight minutes ago is when it comes to the what you want in your life, this is what I desire. This is what I want. The why drives the what. And the why has to be really engulfed in this huge, deep, burning purpose of I don't have time. I'm going to be dead one day and I don't know when that day is yet, which means I can't fuck around. And two, I want to know that whatever time I got left here, I actually mattered. I was successful. I had impact. I improved the lives of others I love and care about. That's what drives the what. What do you want? I want a million dollars. I want to. I want a Kia Carnival, brand new. I want a Lamborghini. I want to go on holiday. Whatever it is, I want to have this relationship. It's not just facts. It could be connections and relationships and different points of attachment. What it is that you desire must be driven through the wire, otherwise you won't stick it out. You'll become a man just like everyone else. The man that embodies a weak, flailing spirit that's just left in a smolder. It's not some bright, burning torch inside of you without that why, without that purpose. Purpose. You don't have time. We're born here to be more than just men who procreate and survive. And you want to know that you mattered. You want to know that you had impact. That's what leadership is. It's not social influence, it's behavioral change inspired in others because of the change that you inspired inside of yourself first. Change is inevitable, but growth is optional. And that's the craziest part of life. You can't avoid the change. When that time comes and you are called upon to go above and beyond what you've done up until that moment, it's too late to prepare best. What's that? I've heard that saying before. Best to have an opportunity. Best to be prepared and not have an opportunity than to have an opportunity and not be prepared. Right? So true. Bit corny, bit cliche, probably a hundred years old, but so true. So as we move through this session, I just want you to reflect on this and go, hey, you know what? There's nothing wrong with you. This battle within, it's a battle that we all face as humans, none more so than men because of the pressure, the stress, the accountability, and who and what we have to answer for in our life as husbands, as fathers, as men. But also know that all you need are too little ingredients to keep feeding, keep fueling that spirit inside of you that wants more. It's the concept of time and how valuable it is. And it's the definition of successful. And your conscious advancement and continually pursuing it's not just one mountain. You are the goal. Your continual evolution is the goal. If version 10.0 is the goal, cool. What do I gotta do to get 3.0, 4.0, 5.0? You can't skip steps, you can't jump steps. If I started HPF tomorrow, sure, I'll be able to get to where we are in seven and a half years, in probably two, maybe less. That's a five year tax or penalty I've paid through my ignorance, my learning and life. Tell you what, turning 40, don't want to really do too many more of them. I don't want to do three or four more things, whether it be family, my wife, HPF's evolution, business, professionally, personally, being an athlete, whatever it might be, I don't want to have three or four more of those types of lessons. And then I'm in my 60s and 70s, So it comes down to acting now with the fuel. You're feeding your spirit as you go, hey, you know what? This is what drives me in my life. The Concept of time and how valuable it is knowing that it could go at any minute and knowing that I'm at it in my life to be successful. Okay, cool. Now what's the what? Knowing you can't. Like I said, you can't skip steps. The hour you're hearing today is a bit different to the very first podcast episode on this podcast, that's for sure. Can't skip steps. So whilst I could accelerate and condense time because of who I am now, couldn't do it back then. That's why it's taken me seven and a half years to get here. And then at the core of all of that, because I gotta tell you guys, like, and I'm proud of everyone listening to this, if you're listening to this, there's a reasonable chance that you've got it. But I tell you what, after doing this for so many years with so many people both inside and outside hpf, some people have it and some fucking people don't. And there are so many men out there that will never have it and they will never be a fit for hpf. And that's not because of us. And I know that seems pretty cold hearted and candid because I talk about change and growth and evolution, whatnot, but I tell you, I believe it. I really do. I think those who don't think they've got it, but really do, there's a lot of them out there and they're just in a tough situation, a tough situation and circumstance that is pulling them away, but they've still got it. But there are plenty out there who've never fucking had it and never will. I'm hoping that's not you and I don't think it would be otherwise. You wouldn't. Why would you listen to this? Why would you listen to these podcasts? So well done. But then there's having it and there's fucking doing something about the fact that you've got it. So you've got it. But what are you doing with it? Are you using it? Yeah, all the superstars, amazing elite sportsman back in the day, whether it's high school or not, and then they just disappear. So plenty of people have it, they just give it up. I think that's worse. Talking about being above average, coming back to my point about 14 minutes ago, I think that's worse. Imagine being above average. Fuck, man, You've already broken through some of the rut. You've got way more to lose because of what you've accumulated. But not only that, your opportunity cost is why you've got way more to lose. Cause you've got it. You're above average. How fucking far can you go? How high can you shoot? How far can you reach? How long can you reach? And extend out so your children standing on your shoulders can go even further and harder and higher and faster. And because they're going to run out of time too. You've only got one life, but so do your wife and kids. So if I'm alive to 80 and my kids are around for like 50, 60 years of that shit, man, that's like 70% of my life. Them watching what I do with my actions. 70% of their life, 70% of my life, they're watching that. That's huge. What example am I setting my children in their 50s about life and growing and pushing and striving? That's what I mean when I say it's infinite, but it's also final on your last breath. So if you're just above average, the biggest cost to you is opportunity cost. You've got some sort of foundation. Where can you go? How hard can you push? How high can you reach? People are average. I mean, not even talking about the ones below average, but people around that average, oh man, they haven't got a chance. If you're above average, you've sparked something slightly different and unique in your life against the grain of the fucking flock or the herd, man. You have no idea what you're capable of. That's good and bad. That's fucking dangerous if you're not doing anything about it. It's also good if you stretch and grow and just push because you can break through limits you don't even know were possible to break through. Yet here you are, breaking through. Breakdown. I didn't know I could do that. I didn't think that was possible. Here I am, wife had left, now we're back together. Thought it was just is what it is. Yeah, that's not a, you know, it's not a dad bod. It's a father figure. All that hiding behind your jokes. Fuck, mate, turn yourself side on, look in the mirror. It's a fucking cancer. If you have a look at that. It's like this big fucking tumor that just needs to be cut off. Oh, God. I don't have a six pack right now. I'm getting pretty fit though. But yeah, like, that's one way to look at it. And that's a bit rough. I'm not here to be real. I'm just saying that's an observation. I Used to do that when I was younger. Look at myself side in the mirror, I'd be like, oh, there's the ribs of Al and the body of Al. What the fuck's this growth? What's this thing at the front of me that's hanging down? Gotta get rid of that. Standards you don't have. And you don't need your whole life to build a standard. Your standard is an instant, it's a buy in. It's that simple. All these limiting beliefs, you didn't think you could break through. Next thing you know, hitting another one, another one, another one, another one, one. HPF to be is recognize the emblem on my chest. I want that to be as recognizable as Ralph Polo before I die. Now as recognizable as Ralph Polo. Super achievable. Super achievable. Super achievable. HPF continues to go. HBF goes for 100 years, 200 years, 300 years. There's no way it can't not be as recognizable. People look at a Ralph Polo, Someone walking around, Ralph Polo shirt and be like, hey, that's nice, man. Yeah, that's you. HPF as well. That's awesome. Oh, no, no, it's. It's the fucking horse hitting something. It's a man sitting on a horse hitting something with a stick. Oh, sorry, mate, got confused. I thought you were wearing a HBF shirt. Super achievable. Super achievable. Deadlines drive deadlines drive desire. Deadlines drive decisions and urgency. I want that to happen while I'm still alive. If I live to 80, I've got 40 years. I don't know how long I'll live for. Pressure's on now. That's a big goal, man. That's a big goal. Things take time. These seven and a half years gone, blink of an eye gone pretty quick. So when it comes to your life and what you desire and what you're pushing and stretching for, you have no idea what you're capable of until you're in an environment that fosters that and a mentality that ensures that and a fuel system that guides the spirit in you to make sure it happens, because it can. And I want you to have that. I want you to have that mongrel, but also that. That harmony inside of your heart and your soul and your spirit. And that mongrels are you. Hey, I'm creating something out of nothing. Your children, something out of nothing. Your business or your place of work, something out of nothing. Experiences holidays, something out of nothing. Every single fucking thing you do was impossible. Until it was done. The reason why it was impossible. Even a holiday, oh, yeah, I can throw money, go on a holiday. Yeah, but it was impossible. It was not a possibility. It, like, it's. It's non existent, didn't exist, didn't come into the fold of reality until you did this at school, went through this career path, met this woman, married this woman, had this child, raised this child, continue to provide for your family, did this, had more children, continue to provide for your family, maintain a relationship with your life. Booked that holiday, flew over, landed, you're sitting on the fucking beach like that journey goes all the way back, all the way back. Decades. Impossible, not possible, non existent. You create something from nothing. You all have that in you. So one, be at peace with the fact of what you're capable of and knowing that you have so much to offer this world and really sit and relish in the fact of the possibilities and what you can have in your life. But don't just stay there. Also get a bit of that gusto, Get a bit of that mongrel in you to go, hey, let's go do something with it, because I've got it. And even though I face this battle every single day, that battle within, that we all face of the man versus the spirit, how can I bring them together as one, in harmony, where the right driver is driving this bus and I'm a man who knows when to retreat into his man cave. Retract, recluse, rejuvenate, recharge, rest, reallocate energy. I'm trying to think of any other words starting with R. So I'm being a bit of a smartass now, but anytime where the man's like, hey, I want to pull back in and just. Yeah, I just need to. Just need a bit of R and R. Okay, cool. That's all right. Don't make that a chronic habit. Next thing you know, watching the TV three hours a night. But then also, where's the spirit in me? How do I feed him? How do I feed that bad boy? He's hungry. He wants more. I want to give him more. I've got version 10.0. Al looking back at me in my dreams, saying, make me real. You've got this, mate. You can do this. Board of directors of life, sitting down in the morning, doing a journal. I'm looking around at my board and there's version 10.0. Al. God. Hey. Knowing what you know, Al version 10.0. What should I be doing right now? Stay the course, mate. Stay on track. Focus on One thing, keep driving hpf. Be the mission lead, first by example. Make sure you look after your family. Look after these men. These men are a halo for this message and mission. HPF is going to reach millions of people. We've got some huge plays in the pipeline, but the core group of men, they really are pioneers. Yeah, we've got some OGs, but even now I'd still call them the OGs. Before 20, 26 hits, all the men coming on board, they are really going to be pioneering this message. We're at a stadium one day with 80,000 people. Maybe there'll be several hundred, maybe there'll be a thousand. Maybe there'll be 1500 that come join me on stage. This core group, it will cap one day. It's not going to be limitless. But this is the core group that shines that light. It's that beacon of hope for these men. It's that lighthouse. All you members listening to this, you are that to me. Hand on my heart, I'm saying that you are that. You are so important to me in this message and this mission. I thank you for that. Because most men out there who've still got it and don't want to lose it like all the rest who don't have it, never had and never fucking will, they don't want to fall into that fold. And they need more than just one voice, and they need to be shown the example. So let's feed this spirit inside of us. There's a man that contains the spirit. Not denying that, and I love that part of us, but there's the spirit that embodies the man and what he can do and what you can do in this life. And I want you to know this battle is something you should welcome every single day. And maybe it doesn't become a battle soon enough. Maybe it just changes and it transitions, it transcends into something more. And it does become a unique relationship where it's not so much a fight anymore. I don't have that fight anymore. Stories are clever. The stories are clever. The little voice can come inside. He's your mate, remember? He knows everything about you. He knows all your little buttons to push. Hey, Al. Al, mate. You've trained hard, mate. Just do three sets. You don't need to do a fourth set today. You're all good, man. Now, I don't get that in the gym. Like, he just. When I go to the gym, he goes and sits in the locker room. That is my 100% domain. That little voice, he never captures me. There, he knows better. He's not silly, he's not dumb. Every single workout I do, I'm not saying I'm always exhausting myself, but the intensity and the intent, phenomenal. Knock it out of the park every training session, regardless of how I feel, it's always performed at my best. But he's sneaky. But maybe it's not a battle. Maybe it becomes a better relationship over time and maybe you just learn how to listen. That spirit inside of it wants more, yearns for more, and just is really screaming. And like I said, if there are kids, teenagers or women or others listening to this that aren't quite fathers yet, like, this is a powerful thing. Maybe this is more of a philosophical podcast today, I don't know. But one thing I will say is you need to not feel or be grateful, but show your gratitude towards life in the limited time that we have. Congratulations. Here's your ticket. You've got another day today. Congratulations. You've got another day today. Today. Hey, guess what? You've got one more day. You know, it's. I remember hearing this on a. I think it was a podcast. Something you only ever. You'll only ever understand the power of one day, just one day. You only ever understand the true power of one day and what you can do in one day when you're threatened with never having another one. That's powerful stuff. Powerful stuff. So when we look at this battle within men as we wrap this up, knowing full well that it's not so much a battle over time, it becomes a relationship with the man and the spirit united as one. You realize the greatest way to feed that is understanding the value of life itself and how limited time is, coupled with the purpose we have in being successful for those we love and care about, which is a continuation. It's a continual journey. It's not just one mountain, it's many mountains and such that by doing that, we can lay back on our deathbed knowing we mattered. And how do we know we mattered most? By knowing that we've won. We're family, self and service. What's the vehicle you are, always have been, always will be. And so will your kids for them and their life and their children for them and their lives and so on and so forth. And that's all we want to do. We just want to win. And this is why I talk about being a four to one man, because life isn't fair. You know that. And the weirdest part, I remember writing this down somewhere, but it's like there's no guarantees in life for all the amazing great things that you do. But there is definitely that law of attraction type. There's that universal energy. If you consistently keep performing, you'll consistently and over time, in a compound way, develop that feedback loop and achieve said outcome. So life will actually give you everything that you ask of it? Absolutely will. What's the asking and the asking price? Well, that's not just words and visualizations and all this manifesting shit. That's not. I don't really. I don't know. I just don't know if I believe in manifestation or even the word, to be honest. But anyway, save that for another day. But yes, life will give you everything you put in, you'll get out. What's hard though, is life will also give you things you don't ask for, which is why it's never a one to one ratio. So whatever it is you're putting out in the universe, yeah, there's a reasonable chance you'll get it all back. But also you might not get it back today. It might be an 18 month journey or an 18 month war instead of 8 months like you originally anticipated because of this curveball, that curveball, that curveball. But you will get there. And that's the hard part. It all chews up time. It all costs time. But life isn't fair, gentlemen. So what do we do with that statement? Do we sit on it? Yeah, life's not fair. Do we allow it to control our decisions, our thoughts and feelings? Absolutely not. You recognise. Okay, well life isn't fair. What am I gonna do about it? Well, this is what you do about it. You'll become a fucking four to one man. Write that down. Write it on a poster Note. Be a 4.1 man. Be a 4 to 1 man. Because all we ever want is that one. That's all you ever need. Just that one. Or this. With your wife. She doesn't initiate intimacy. Okay, you don't have initiate intimacy. What can you do that would drive her desire for you so that she will want to initiate or at least be reciprocal when you're initiating and advancing that connection of intimacy with her? I don't do one to one. You won't. It won't work. If you're a one to one man, you won't get the one. If you're a two to one man, you won't get the one. If you're a three to one man, you won't got the one. But if you can be a four to one man, you will get the fucking one. I promise you, whether it's your wife, your kids, and don't you want that? If I gotta come 90, but that means my kids will come to 10, I'm gonna get what I want anyway. And that 10 might be over time compounding their appreciation and respect for me as a father. I'm always the hero in their eyes. They constantly come to me for guidance, leadership and mentorship. When they start having children, when they're building their own businesses or place of work, when they're looking at expanding their friendships or developing a de, a relationship with their husbands or wives, like absolutely, absolutely. It's worth it to me. Why wouldn't I come 90 if I can come 90? So my two daughters come to 10 and in 10, 15 years time I have a great relationship with them. And not only them, but 15 to 20 years time or maybe more, but 25, 30 years time, they're having kids, they're married, their husband, there's great alignment. I'm not here to step on the toes of their husband, but he also comes under my wing, he becomes a son to me. That's, that's one. That's a tight unit. That's the one. Of course it's worth it. So sometimes we have pity parties, we've got to hand out the invites, run the party short, turn the fucking lights off, kick everyone out and then get the fuck up and go, hey, I'm going to be a four to one man. Why wouldn't I? Or why would you, man? It's not worth it. What, the one isn't worth it? Yeah, that's right. That's why you're the one commenting on my fucking ads. And your wife and your kids fucking hate you if you're dishing that shit up to me. I can't imagine what's happening in your home life and you're telling me it's not worth it. What about women too? What about high performance mother? Fuck you like, where's your head at? What are you doing to take ownership over yourself in your life? It's disgusting. Mind you, a real high performance mother would be fantastic for. Yeah, here's the thing, just wrapping up on this. What makes women so special in terms of communication, connection, relationships and what men want and need? You think they've been taught by their mums? Absolutely not. Not at all. Are women better communicators than men? Doubt it. They communicate more, but if there isn't truth or honesty inside of that communication, that doesn't make them better, just makes them more frequent. So Women need help too. Women aren't made. They can grow, they can build, they can develop. They can develop in family, self and service. So absolutely, a high performance mother would be fantastic. What I'm saying is why the fuck as a man would you sit back on your ass and look for someone else to do some other fucking thing for someone else in your life so you get even better rewards doing nothing. Hey, I want this person to start a high performance mother to connect to my wife, to make my wife do stuff so I get more cool, man, what have you done? Help me understand your level of leadership. I'm curious. Oh, mate, I. I know men listening to this are not that way inclined, otherwise you wouldn't be listening. But fellas take this as a valuable gift of who to never be and what not to do are very powerful. I'm not here to yell or lecture or put it over. Those men are certainly not here to do that to those men through you. What I'm doing is I'm helping you see a pretty clear example. Hey, boys, make sure you never dive into that stuff. Don't ever entertain that stuff. Do we have feelings? Of course you're not robotic. Do we have desires and sensations and impulses? And I think of course we do, all of it. But I promise you this. If you keep going, you keep growing, you foster the spirit inside you, he's driving the ship. You become a four to one man. I promise you, you'll get the one. And that might not always be your wife. Maybe things have been separated, maybe there's time to move on, but 80% of the divorces that happen probably haven't really given it a great crack. Maybe more. At least going all in and exploring and exhausting all options. And then sometimes people eventually do just drift apart. But what could have stopped the drifting upstream? And can we realign and drift back on course together? You can. It's possible. But if you be a four to one man, the one is symbolic of your success and continued success, making you successful in life, in family, self and service, regardless of who's part of it. Whether it's more your grandkids than your kids, whether it's your wife or your second wife, whether it's your brothers, cousins, your mother or father still alive. Don't you want to be a phenomenal son to your parents? I do. That's what the 4 to 1 is. It's not holding on attachments to external things that you can't control. It's understanding that you will get the one if you go above and beyond the curveball that comes for you, Cyclone Alfred, whatever it might be, anything, any trauma, anything you can't see the life throws at you. If you geared yourself up where you can operate where your Life is at 60, 70% easy because you're such a fucking animal. And you just dominate in life when something happens and you get stretched to 100%, you're still good. You're still good. Think of it this way. Wouldn't you want to be a version 3.0 that experiences current challenges that 2.0s are having? Of course you would. You wouldn't want the opposite. I want to be a version 1.0 that experiences the challenges that version 2.0 requires. Man. Good luck with that. If you build and face, don't turn away, you face this battle within and you feed the spirit in you and you become a four to one man. I promise you, men, you'll win. You'll get the one. Let's wrap this up. Hope this serves you well. Looking forward to having some special guests on and doing many more. But I've missed you all. I've missed doing this, and hopefully this really hits home for you. I really hope it does. And hopefully I'll see some of you boys in Brisbane. Cheers, guys. I'll see you in the next one. Well, that wraps up another episode. And just as we wind this down, I want you to just reflect and think back through some of the golden nuggets, some of the revelations, some of the sore points, some of the things that might have hit home with you, and then just look at ways that you can apply a different set of actions to change your position, change your circumstances, change your feelings, and change the facts. These episodes are done with your best interest at heart. And there's always something we can get from that. Maybe it's not the first time, maybe it's the second time. We've had members listen to episodes four or five times and then it finally clicks. But either way, I hope you got a lot of value out of this. And also if this is something that you really want to solidify inside of your life, repetition is the key. You've listened to it. Write down your revelations, think about them, read them, speak them, believe in the changes that you will carve out in the action plan of those revelations to create change in your life and then share that. And when you teach, you learn the second time, right? So teaching and showing this to others you love and care about is the greatest way that you can remember and make sure you can consistently learn and relearn what is it's true and what is it is important to you in your heart. Take care. Have an amazing day night weekday weekend and I'll see you for another one soon. Cheers.