301. Again, I Rise: Aidan Charles 1,000 Days On

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Thank you.

I, um, I just want to read before we kick off because it'd be great for you to do a little re-intro, but definitely, uh, I just want to reread, uh, where are they here, the first 2 episodes. That we did. So episode 240, 33-year-old father with terminal cancer's advice, May 3rd, 2024. And then September 2nd, 2025, episode 272, Defying Death, Aidan's Fight Beyond Terminal Cancer. 3rd year running, man. How, how does it feel like sitting here knowing that you've been doing this longer? than anyone told you was possible. Like, mate, it's incredible.

Yeah. Look, it's, um, I'm blown away every day. Every day I rise, it's just, it's a new day, right? You know, it's, there's your ticket, ticket for the day. And that's what I hold dearly. It's, I joined a 12-month program, 270 days prognosis to live. Joined a 12-month program, and now I'm over 1,000 days in. So pretty incredible comparison to the person I was and now the person I am now.

You look good, man. Like, you actually look, you look really, and it's not, I mean, we all have our days where, you know, oh mate, my kids, daddy, what are all these lines and these wrinkles? And they'll see a photo of like, man, only 4 or 5 years ago and be like, daddy, you look so, you You look so young. I'm like, oh man, the dog shots. So no, not that, but you know, that's what you've gone through, mate, is not your everyday run-of-the-mill, hey, this is a challenge, it's going to make me look a little bit fatigued. Like you've been in the, you've, you've had your, your extended periods of time in the wars and, uh, mate, you look awesome. You look really healthy. Got a good head of hair there, mate. Looking strong. And, um, hey, how are you feeling? Give us, give us a bit of an update, man, on, on how life's been for Mr. Charles and And the beautiful legacy that you're building, um, over the last 12 months.

Look, the last 12 months have been, as the last podcast, you know, it's been a roller coaster. It's, it's been ups and downs. Um, we've, I've had to, you know, scrounge back my health. Uh, I've had to, I've had to sort of regrow, um, even over the past year. You know, I've changed from the previous podcast. It was, I was, I was pretty much the guy, the person that was just surviving. I wasn't living, if that sort of makes sense. I was prepared my funeral. You know, I've said goodbye to, to my wife and kids and my friends. I realized that sort of along the Along this, this year, um, you know, that, that 1,000 days clicked over and I had 1,000 days of being a father, you know, being a husband, being, being a mate, being a person in this world. Um, and that, that was really significant to me when that, uh, you know, you guys put together that, that video for me. Um, I watched that with my family and that was just incredible. To watch my kids realize that there's something special inside of, I guess, the words that I've spoken over the past few years inside HPF. And to see all those guys, you know, just to say thank you for something that I didn't realize I did. And I guess that's the legacy part. It's, it's pretty incredible to think that, you know, I was there, 45 kilos, you know, 3, 3 years prior saying goodbye. And now I'm here, you know, climbing mountains, still in the gym 4 days a week. I'm back, back working. Look, I've had to let a lot of things go over the, the past years. Yeah. Last time we spoke, I actually had started my, uh, started up a new business. So I created a brick and mortar business from nothing. Um, and then things were declining. Uh, my health was going downhill. So I ended up having to, to sell the business. Um, and for me to even do that in this, I guess, day and age with what's happening in the world. You know, finance-wise. And to sell it right the day before capital gains tax came in was incredible. So to build something and then to get something out of it at the end was, it wasn't defeat. I thought we'd just have to shut doors and close. But yeah, it wasn't defeat. It was a new chapter. And that's when I really, really dug deep. I was like, you know what, I'm not surviving anymore. I'm going to live my life. And that's what I did. I just made a decision to just to get up and live, to not let that diagnosis define my world. You know, obviously we still, I still think about cancer, you know. Yeah. Every day. Um, but I just found, you know, I had to look inside myself, like, what am I contributing to the world? How am I showing up? What am I teaching my kids? And that's what really, really made me sort of, sort of push on. Um, yeah, like I've been, uh, I think You know, it's going back a while in my head, but I think it was, oh, maybe start of the year when Adam actually came up and saw me. Maybe it was last year, but look, I've been told that it's palliative care time and I'm sick of hearing that. I've been told that a few times now and And when they tell you that, it's, it's like 6 to 7 weeks you've got because it's, that's what they tell you. And the mind's very powerful and I don't want to struggle, um, being in a room alone without my family. And that's just not how my days are supposed to end. Uh, so yeah, I really, really, really pushed on. Through, through this year. But yeah, it's definitely been, been a huge struggle, but I've, I've definitely grown more this year than I have the previous years. You know, the support, the accountability I had within HPF, it's, it's just a game changer. Absolute game changer for me. I told the guys this is what I was doing, and we made it happen. You know, the check-ins, the check-ins. You know, my coach Ed, he's just did the last podcast, and he's phenomenal. He's very persistent. He's got a heart of gold. You know, and he did, he did save, save me, and. I owe that to him and I try to give back in every way I can. Um, 'cause I've helped along this year. But yeah, look, um, yeah, I'm not sure where you want me to go with that, Alex. It's just, it's, it's so hard to put in the year in words because it's, it's really a feeling. It's, it's not, it's not even a fight. It's just, I was stuck in that survival mode. Yeah. And this year I have fucking lived and it's, it's awesome. I feel better, got way more energy. It's not just, it's, yeah, it wasn't, it's not just about getting through the year. It's about achieving the most out of the year for me. So yeah.

That's incredible, man. Well, what, take us back though then, mate. Like, what was that moment like? Like the tumor started to Grow again, palliative care, or told or advised, this is, this is the path that remains for you. Like, you know, and having to, to fight, or, you know, in your words, having to survive or be pushed or challenged, challenged through a battle that, that you'd already won. You know, what, what was that like, mate?

It's, it's really hard. It, it, it smashes you down. Like, it really kills your self-esteem. It kills your confidence. It kills everything inside of you. Yeah. Um, you've been like, I've been trying so hard to consistently get on top of it. Um, and I know it's something I can't control. And that's, that was, that was the thing. It's like, I can't control whatever happens to the tumor, but I can control my mind and sort of how I feel after they tell me. And that's probably the most powerful thing because the previous times they've told me that, you know, your tumor's growing, um, you know, and every statistics, you know, every centimeter, every millimeter. Is months and years off your life expectancy. So, um, you just sit there thinking, well, it's this big and I've been going through it now. So it's, it's like, well, I can sort of do the math and then, oh fuck, I'm gonna die in a few months if that's what they're telling me. And that's what you start thinking. Um, but this time I was like, cool. Good on you. Thanks for telling me. Now I've got some fucking work to do. Looks like I've gotta work harder because obviously my days aren't up. They're telling me, well, you got this much time, mate. They've told me I had, had weeks to live. I've been in palliative care. I've signed up, you know, I've met all my nurses. I've had a palliative care team at home. I'm not going through that again. I'm not watching my kids deal with that again. Yeah, it was, it was a killer, man. It was, there's some hard times in your life. My father dying, letting go of what I let go at, at Cossie with, 2 very significant things in my life. And then getting told I was, had, had brain cancer and it was terminal. To hear that again and again, you just get this resilience. Like, you know what? You've told me this so many times; it's so hard to believe you now. Like, are you a professional? Are you just going off statistics of an eighty-year-old? Because I'm thirty-five now. It's yeah, it's it's it's it's a mind game. It really is. You can either believe it. Or you can believe it, put it behind you and do something about it. And those are your only 2 options out. And for me, it's why give up? Like, I've got too much to lose now. Um, I didn't used to think that way, but mate, the life I've got now is 100 times better than anything I've ever had. And I want to continue that for a long time.

Isn't it crazy though, man, how small but significant that shift is? You know, most men, you know, like I said, you thought you'd won the battle and here we are again, but most men think that they've got a handle on things and then life comes, um, not usually knocking or whispering on the door quietly, comes crashing through the house, right? But, um, but that, that small but significant shift between Where a man or where a person chooses to take control. Like, yeah, I can believe it and then wash my hands and that's— or I can acknowledge that and believe and go, yeah, that's cool, but I'm still going to do it anyway. I'm going to keep going. We keep moving. That's, um, most men break once and that's it. Like, how do you process that mentally, Aiden? Like, that's a, you know, you, you've had to rebuild your mindset and, and, and reshape your identity as we all do. Many, many times. Like, how do you keep recalibrating, man? I mean, one thing I guess, I guess would say for sure would be shifting and focusing on only what you can control, like you said just then. But it's, uh, it's, it is inspiring, man. Like, how do you, how do you process these challenges mentally and keep recalibrating and rebuilding that mindset to become stronger and stronger over time?

Yeah, um, look, the way I think about it Is I've, um, I've gone through probably the worst of what I have gone through. I see, uh, people that have gone through what I've gone through with worse tumors, with wild-type tumors, and they're, they're still pushing through. There's a, there's a top percent in the world. That I feel that have this drive that when bad things happen, they push harder. It's, it's almost like a, it's a proof thing. Yeah. If I can, if I can sort of use Kosi, the, the mountain, I guess, you know, the comparison was You know, 3 years before that, it was, you got this many months to live, you, you'll be dead. And then I was standing at the base of a mountain at 4:30 in the morning going, holy shit, I'm here. I'm preparing to climb a mountain. 3 years ago, I was preparing to lay down in bed and close my eyes and never open them again. Like the comparison to me is like, I can fucking do it, and those are the only words in my head. I can do it. It's been tried, it's been tested, and it's been proven that I can push through the hardest times that I think that are hardest times in my life. It wasn't like it wasn't about just. Like climbing the mountain, I guess, like walking my life. It was proof, not proof to anyone else. It was just proof to me that I can still do things. Like I can go through all this discomfort, um, and I can really, really push through the moments where I wanted to stop. You know, it was like the, the tenets of HPF came back in. It was like one more step, you know, one more day. I've got one more day, so let's make the day count. We don't count the days, we make the day count. So it's one foot in front of the other. Um, you know, and as I was climbing up there, it was, it was heartbreaking and I was just shedding so much pain along the way. You know, I had to stop quite a few times, but I was so proud of myself when I made it to the top. As soon as I made it to the top, I thought anything was achievable. And when I looked back down that mountain, I just saw my life. You know, it sounds cheesy, but I did. I saw my life in front of me and I thought, well, if I can do this, you know, there's hardly any preparation. I woke up late. I had half a banana and climbed Mount Kosciuszko. You know, hats off to all the boys that did months and months of training, but my God, you didn't need it, which is all good. It's just one foot in front of the other, determination. Um, and that's what I guess my mindset is now. It's just this hunger for life now because I know how precious it is. I know how little time we have on this earth. You look back a year and you're like, holy crap, where'd it go? And you just think, I'm not going to look back on my life and go, where did it go? I'm going to look back on my life and I'm going to be humbled. I'm going to be like, I did it. I did this for my children, not for me. Yeah, me in a way, but it was, it's, it's, it's proof. To my kids and my wife that this is the man that I am now. A man that is a man of his word and he doesn't give up because I've told you I'm not giving up. And there's gonna be a day that's gonna come and look, it's gonna happen to, to every one of us. But until that day comes, it's one foot in front of the other, you know, leaving them footsteps in the snow for someone else to follow. And that's, that's the way I think, yeah.

I love the last 2 episodes we did, mate. And, um, I get a real sense in this one of a, and your journey as of late of a real solidification of this is my life. This is my journey. One day, one step at a time though. I'm going to do it my way. I'm going to lead. I'm going to live with purpose and keep building. But this isn't the first time you've been ambitious. You've built big businesses, been financially successful before in the past and whatnot. Where, when is it recently or was it start of the year? When did that moment shift for you between all these battles and, oh, you know, I'm fighting cancer. Like when did it shift from that to, hey, this is my life and I'm going to do it this way. And what you're carrying right now, mate, cause I can sense a real solidification in your mentality and your approach to life, Aidan. And also you living that way when that moment happened, how's that working out for you? How has that impacted not only you, but your relationships at home?

Relationships are amazing at home. Yeah, look, they're really good. I can't ask for much better. Like, I've definitely lived a life where I thought was awesome. Yeah, I've been financially successful. I've worked hard, been ego-driven. I was never family driven, which I get more of a kick out of than earning big money. Hey, see my, you know, seeing Jared turn 7, you know, my youngest son turned 7. That blows any, any contract out of the water. Any contract. Yeah. Like the, the perspective of my life is That's that's what I do now. I meant the like I guess the mentality of you know what I see the shift of the kids. Now they're more comfortable with me, which is which is really good. You know there's it's always days that we're going to struggle being a parent, but it's hmm. I'm not sure. Hey, it's, I just have this, I don't know, good aura, I'd say, when we walk into the house now. And it's just a presence that I have that the kids know that it's a safe space. It's comfortable. And, um, life's, life's okay. You know, um, back on track, I guess. We've built businesses, we've sold businesses. Owed money to people, but we've always sort of pushed through. But the, uh, the comparison between money and living is, it's just not there really. It's, um, mate, if I earn $20 a day for the rest of my life, it wouldn't bother me as long as my kids are happy. And that's really all that matters to me. Um, Yeah, I don't know that I'll answer that question. Sorry, Al, it's a very, very deep one.

You answered it well, mate. And, uh, you know, I guess in the, the precursor to that was like, when, when was that moment for you? Has it felt recently or, or post, like you said, post-Kozi last year? When do you feel like you've really hit another gear, mate, and things have started to click?

Um, look, definitely It was Vic Catch Up, so Victoria Catch Up. I thought, you know what? I've never done, never never been down down to Melbourne. There's some guys there I really want to see, and there's some guys that just rallied around and made it happen. They got me down there. It was. Absolutely amazing. And I sat there at a table where, um, I didn't really know anyone. Most of them new members because I thought, you know what, I'm going to watch, I'm going to watch the start of this guy's journey. And I guess that was, that was the point where I changed my thinking going, I'm going to enjoy watching these guys grow for the next 3 years. I'm gonna make that happen. This guy's struggling right now and I can fucking help. There's so much more to me that I can give and I want to give more. And that was it. I spoke to a few guys there and, um, you know, Chris, who I mentioned last night, but Chris definitely knows who he is. He, uh, mentioned something to me. For my actual tumor, and over the past few months, it has been an absolute weapon of a killer for my tumor. And that only started with a conversation. I wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for Chris mentioning that. And I thought this is a guy. That's watched my journey. He's got his own stuff going on and he actually did some research, took the time out of his own day to help someone that's thousands of kilometers away that he doesn't really know. And he's just mentioned one thing and that's it. Just one thing and let me run with it. And it's like, if, if one conversation changes one man, Then many conversations can change many men if you get rid of the ego. And I got rid of it. That was, that was it. I can definitely, definitively say Vic Katchup was that, that changer for me, man, where I really, really just pushed through. It was like, I'm gonna run with it. Um, you know, and we, we talk about legacy and, and just going forward. I tell a little story. There's a guy called Pete on the Sunshine Coast. It used to be a guy called Pete on the Sunshine Coast. They named a roundabout after him just down the road from me. There's this old guy that used to get out every morning and just wave to all the kids going to school. And like, it was like 10 years. Of just before school, after school. And he, uh, I think he passed away maybe 3 years ago, 3, 4 years ago, something like that. And just him waving to children made the Sunshine Coast rally together, name a roundabout after him. You know, they paid for his funeral. He was a man that no one really knew. But he was a man that changed people, their perspective on beginning their day. There was someone to wave to. Like, how many kids go to school without saying goodbye to their parents? And then they get to see old Pete with a big smile on his face waving at everyone. And that's what I feel— getting a bit emotional— that's what I feel legacy is. It's not about It's not about things. It's, it's just these certain points in your life where you're like, you know, my kids don't listen to me, but they watch me. And that's legacy. It's the actions of a man create your legacy, not the words of a man. You know, we're pretty big on the be a man of your word in HPF. But I also believe, you know, that old cliché, actions are louder than words. It's so true because your kids model themselves after your actions, not your words. Um, so yeah, that was definitely the, the, that point in time.

You gave me an interesting thought too, man. Like I did, it's, uh, I've never thought about it this way, but I, I would Uh, I'm trying to find holes in it, but I would argue pretty strongly that the greater your legacy is, not the more famous or infamous you are, but the greater, the more impactful your legacy is. It's like a sliding scale. The less your ego would need to be. I would say, now don't get me wrong, there's people in positions of power with huge ego and huge influence, but do they really have a legacy? Like, is it, if we're talking on our terms, it's like a legacy is just the beauty and the gift that you leave in people. Um, you know, and I would say that, that old Pete would be extremely, you know, carry himself with great humility where it's like, uh, what I want to do in my own time for myself is nowhere near as important as me going out and, um, and blessing people for the day and wishing them well, uh, and welcoming them back, back home. It's awesome. But you mentioned that word ego though. Like, what do you think? Like, how do you feel ego can hold a man back? A father, a leader, a husband, a provider, like, yeah, I'd love to get a bit more insight from you on that.

Yeah. Um, it can destroy you. Like, it can destroy you so quickly. Um, I mean, even going back to, I guess, you know, my glory days when I was, you know, had my flooring company and, you know, 20-something-year-old walking into A room full of CEOs thinking he's swinging a big thing, walking in a room. That was my ego. It's like, give me, give me this attention, give me this authority, you know, give me the respect. It's so humbling getting rid of the ego. Um, yeah, I thought about this a lot and I've had to face mortality. I've had to prepare my own funeral and it's, it was something for me. I needed to get rid of my ego for me to, I guess, build The legacy, you know, one day I'm not going to be here, and that in itself is humbling. I know I'm not going to be here like everyone else is going to be. You know, I'm not going to see the gray hair, and that's a reality for me. You know, I know I've got so many more days ahead. But I know I don't have as many days as the average man. And to humble yourself and get rid of that ego and strip it away is, it, it just lifts this weight off your shoulders. Um, you know, there's gonna be a day that I'm gonna be gone and, you know, my wife, if she ever meets someone. I can't, I don't see that as, as like jealousy. Um, I just hope that I've let her understand what the values actually matter in a man. It's, you know, not perfection, it's not money, it's not status, it's not how impressive they are. You know, it's integrity, it's, it's loyalty, it's strength, it's Fucking presence, being a good father, asking for help when it's needed. Like, I don't need to be irreplaceable in my life. I need to be fucking meaningful in this space right now. It's like, and that's such a different thing. I don't want my wife to spend the rest of her days trying to replace me. I want her to understand the standard, the standard in me. And that's what I want for her. And that's what I want for my kids if that time happens. And for, you know, for to even say that. To even have that thought in your head, you have to get rid of the ego. And it's probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. And look, I still struggle with it. 100%, I struggle with it. But once you strip that ego away, mate, it can unleash a new level of life because you're not, as I said, you're not trying to be irreplaceable. You just You're there. You're present. And that word presence is so big. You ask any child the presence of their parents and they'll happily tell you. You know, you ask a 6-year-old, they're going to tell you how much their dad plays with them, how much their mum plays with them. And I want it to be meaningful. So yeah, I hope, hopefully that answers the question, man. Um, yeah, like that's, that's how I've had to really, really let go.

And look, uh, dissolving the ego, um, pushing it to the back of the bus and removing it, mate, from steering the wheel of your life, uh, could be related to what you've gone through. Um, but also I am curious. You know, like what, what can death staring a man in the face give him that otherwise we seldom find the opportunity to have those realizations, Aiden, when it comes to life, priorities, families? You just mentioned presence. Like you stared death in the face a few times, man. Like what can that give you that could give us some wisdom, give us some, some value like that? It's so, we all talk about this and we'll have one-liners and it's a podcast or it's an event and, you Yeah, awesome. But then the rest of the world just tries to fucking pull you apart and distract you and sedate you and tempt you into things that are unwholesome. And what, what, what can, what's that catalyst that you can really get that otherwise we can't? Because it's not a common thing for us all to either see a newborn baby, because I've definitely had some profound, um, you know, views on life when, when that's happened with all of my children. But what can death staring a man in the face give him? That otherwise, um, we struggle to see or find or remember that matters most in life?

What a good question. Look, you don't need a terminal illness to realize that you're wasting your fucking life. You don't need to die, in fact you nearly need to die, to realize that your kids are growing up. And You don't need to have any of this to realize that your wife actually needs you. But there's so much that I see guys are missing out on, fathers are missing out on. Um, they don't appreciate what they already have. They're trying to appreciate something that is apparently coming. It's like, don't wait. Just fucking— yeah, I can say it. Fucking don't wait now. Why wait? Have the fucking conversation. Make the phone call. Hug your kids. Tell your wife you love her. Put some action. Put those words into fucking action. Ask for help. Ask for forgiveness. That's going to be hard for some people asking for forgiveness. Because I fucked up, fucked up many times. But whatever sort of mountain you're climbing, start climbing now. Why are you waiting? And I keep, I mean, I've, I've said that so many times in the, in our, you know, monthly sort of Fire Breathers chats. Why fucking wait now? Like, what are you waiting for? And I ask that to so many people when, you know, they're talking to me and they ask me that question. I said, well, what are you waiting for? Are you waiting for your wife to go, you know, I'm done. Here's the divorce papers. And then, oh fuck, maybe I'll get myself into action. Like, you don't need to stare death in the face to start living your life. And that's the That's the biggest opportunity you guys have. I don't get that, but I'm telling you, you fucking have that. And that's, that's, that's pretty much all I can say. Don't fucking wait. Have the conversation with yourself, yourself now, not anyone else. Don't ask your fucking mate down the pub on a Friday afternoon after 5 beers because he's not going to give a shit. He's got other stuff going on. Look at yourself in the mirror and go, where the fuck do I want to be? What life do I want? And when I actually am, you know, pretty close to dying, what are people going to think of me? Because that really, really hits hard. What are people going to think about me? What are my family going to think about me? What are they going to say about me after I am not here? And it's the after not here thought that always gets me. It's like, you know, there's always people talking behind your back, but you want it to be good. It's, that's, that's all I ask for. And yeah, like I just want to, if I can reach through, you know, the headphones that people listening to now and just grab your neck and go, come on, let's fucking go. Mate, it's just, it blows my mind that men have to get into their, hit the lowest, darkest points in their life to kick on. And it shouldn't fucking be like that. Like, I want you to win. You have no idea what, you know, winning is. It's just, it's, it's breath. It's the air. Like, that's what it is to me. Um, so yeah.

Imagine, imagine laying on, that's powerful, man. And couldn't agree more. You know, imagine laying on your deathbed and, and just seeing a vision and the vision is, um, it's, it's a TV screen with all different experiences that you could have had, but never did. Um, the, the, the ghosts of, of all the different versions, version 3.0, 4.0, 6.0, 7.0, all the ideas, dreams, and goals. had, and that's all taking form around you. And those future versions that never eventuated are standing there looking over you as you're laying on your deathbed going, hey, I'm just curious, man, all this stuff here, like, this is all possible. How come you didn't do anything about it? I'd love to know, like, what, what stopped you? Like, we planted the seed, we were whispering in your ear, we showed you, um, you know, we showed you HPF. I'm just kidding. We showed you, you know, we, we showed you things that could get you into gear and get your ass into action and, and moving the direction that you know deep down you want, but you just, you suppress that gut, that feel, that, that intuition. I'm curious, like, why'd you do that? Yeah, and that's the hardest part, Aidan, because we all know the common answer is, is, is actually, whilst we say it's rooted in fear, it's rooted in ego because it's the sense of self that is protecting it with the possibility of failure. which withholds it from ever making a decision and moving forward and taking the leap. Man, like, let me tell you now, guys, the more successful you become, the greater the student you are, the greater the servant you are for people and life and community and your legacy, and the greater the failures you've had. Like, the more it's, it's, it's, I talk about being the chalk chips in the cookie, you know, it's part of the formula, mate. Like, it doesn't mean you need to go unnecessarily being reckless and looking for trouble. But understand that the more micro failures or lessons or learnings or points where you looked a bit foolish, or we were talking about this before we hit record, Aiden, about my, my earlier videos. And I listened to my first podcast and the bones were still there, but it's like, wow, there's a difference between learning and learning and having some knowledge and books and, and, and knowing, you know, with, with conviction through the men of HPF, not through me. That's, that's the shift in my confidence. It's not that Al's more confident because of Al. It's, it's The, the, uh, the environment around me, which I'm very lucky to be part of. But it's crazy, isn't it, man? Like, imagine having that and it's like, hey, just, just out of, out of curiosity, how come you never actioned anything that could have been yours if you just took the plunge? But, uh, your kids have seen you, man. They've seen you in low lows and high highs. Like, what— how do they, how do they see you now? Like, what are they saying? Your son, he was 3, maybe 4 when you got the news, I guess, originally. But yeah, what— What do they understand about Dad and, and, and who they see now?

Dad's a maniac to them. Doesn't stop. It's like, it's almost like, I, I just, I've never really sat down even on my couch. I'm not that type of person, you know? And it's, it's so, it's, it's so awesome. You know, my son's 16, turned 16, and it's like, We're getting to do these boy things now that, you know, we weren't allowed to do. And that's just, it's fucking great to be able to spend time with him. And, you know, he, he's a big, big kid. You know, he's a bit taller than me. His shoulders are broad, mate. I think I need to do like 600 push-ups a day just to keep up with the kid. I don't know what's in his food, but I'm not getting it. But, um, you know, for, for James, like, he's my stepson, you know, he's, uh, met Kathy when he was 1 and I've watched him grow and, you know, I see he doesn't say much, um, you know, to me, but there's definitely a video that he's, uh, he posted on one of his social media accounts and, um, it was when we did the walk for brain cancer and I've got that video saved, and you know, every time I feel down, I just sort of look at it because he's—he knows that I'm fighting. He knows that I'm fighting for them. That's what makes it okay. It's the—it's the trust that they have in me to know that I will fight until the very last minute because obviously I can't sit still. And, you know, it's the boys are, the boys are so different to, you know, my, my daughter Azalee, you know, spitting image of me. And I just see so much of myself in her. And I, I just, you know, she, I'm definitely not like the, the girl sort of dad, you know, but she's such a girly girl. It's, it's, It's just beautiful that I've been able to sort of watch her grow. And she, like, she loves me. She loves, um, getting on the back of my, my motorbike and we, we love going for a ride. She's a bit of a rev head, that one. So it's gonna be dangerous. Um, but mate, we've had some beautiful conversations just about, you know, very, very private, deep conversations just about It's okay that I'm not gonna be here. And in a way, over the past sort of, you know, 6 to 8 months, I'd say, you know, we had a conversation a few weeks ago and I asked 'em how they felt about it and they said, Dad, it's okay. Like, son. Yeah. Like, we know you're gonna be here with us forever. And, you know, after that night, it was, we, we spoke about this on the last podcast. It was, you know, the kids would say goodnight and I would, they'd say, I'll see you tomorrow. And I'd stay awake all night just to see them the next day. And you know, I've never slept better having that reassurance that it's okay. They're gonna be strong because I've instilled that in them. Mate, that's, that's all I could ask for. And that's Why I've been fighting the past 4 years. I just wanted my kids to be proud of me. And now I have that.

Is that what this is? What— you're getting emotional. Like, what sits on your heart, man, when you're thinking of your children?

Future. What they're going to go through. Have I spoken to them enough? Have I missed anything? What's my daughter going to look like walking down the aisle? What's, you know, my son's first heartbreak? Son's first car? It's, you know, I do live in the, in, in definitely the present, but when I see my kids, I don't, I don't see them there. Like, you know, in that, in that moment I do, I'm there with them, but I'm thinking about changes they can have in life. And that's, I want to be there for them. That, that, that's it. It's just, I want to be there. I want to see the future. I want to see as much as I can in the time that I have. And if that annoys the shit out of them, so be it. Good luck to them because they're not getting rid of me. It's, yeah, I just, um, it's future, bro. It's the future and it's, it's getting rid of that ego to see the future. Yeah.

Hmm. Becoming a, uh, you're becoming an elder in the, that's a beautiful piece, by the way, but I, I want to shift that into the, the men of HPF. Becoming a statesman in the community, you know, being here over 1,000 days now, you've seen plenty of men come in broken and then building, you know, like what, what's that like for you, man? Like, what do you see in the new guys that reminds me of where you were, you know, not so long ago?

I just see, it's not so much they're broken, they're just lost. We don't have the tools. It was like, you, you're, you're a product of your environment. If you don't have the tools and the resources, you know, I didn't have the tools and resources. I didn't know I was doing anything wrong because we get told that, you know, you gotta provide. And that word provide is so vast. What the fuck does provide mean? What the fuck do you want me to do? Like, I just, um, I just think it's, yeah, it's, it's, they're just not broken. They just don't have the tools to actually get up and go, you know what? I may be fucked up and now I need to apologize, but I need to put something into action where I don't want to be here anymore. And look. I mean, I've seen some guys absolutely fly because they have made that, they've drawn that line in the sand from day one. Wow. I do see, I do see guys struggle because, you know, and I've gone through it, the guys that are winning, they join when they're not winning. They see these guys winning all the time, look what I've done, but they don't realize the fucking work they've had to put in. You get out as much as you put in. It's that simple. For the guys that aren't giving as much as they should, and they know that, you know, this isn't a fucking, um, no, we don't get, we don't get awards every week going, oh, Aiden got 5 gold stars, so let's pass him this fucking week. It's no, it's, you know, you're on a phone call with your coach going, hey, I've, I've won in this area, but you know what, I'm fucking up in this area. What else can I do? Give me some tools. And it's usually, you know, talk to the guys, be, be yourself, get rid of your ego, post what is on your mind because there's hundreds of men within HPF that have gone through or going through, have been through 7 times. You know, we all read books. I guess we'll take this as an example. We all read books. So someone's written this over, you know, autobiography or whatever, over 20 years of their life. And you've read that book within one week. You've just accumulated 20 years of one man's knowledge in one week. Take some fucking advice. Get rid of that ego and just go, let's try it. Let's try it. And that's where I see the guys really start to just fly, where they just go, let's just do this one thing. Let's implement one thing and then we'll implement something else. But it's the consistency. Consistency is key. You need to stay consistent throughout the whole process or You're gonna lapse. 100%. Yep.

That's powerful advice. The, um, I was gonna ask you like what, going back a few years for yourself, you know, what would, what would the Aidan now say to the Aidan 3 years ago when he first got the bombshell or the news drop? But at the same time, um, I'm sure you've told me, I'm just curious like why you actually reached out to HPF and joined too. Maybe you could answer both in one go, mate, but I'm just, yeah, I'm genuinely curious of why you did reach out and But, but, but what would, what would you say anything different? Because it'd be hard to say yes, because I guess something clicked in your head, which had you reach out and take the plunge anyway. But yeah, I am genuinely curious on that. Would you say anything? Um, and if so, what? And, uh, and why did you join HPF?

Mate, I joined because my life was broken. I was weeks away from death. Like I was. Oh, the week before I called, made that, you know, made the call to HPF, I gave up. Had already given up, given up on everything in my life, made the decision I was gonna die. And then I've seen so much death over my life. You know, I've seen quite a lot of male figures in my life leave. Selfishly, I didn't do it for me. I did it sort of out of spite to go, look, I'll join something and Maybe the kids will think that I made an effort in the last, the last stint. And that's the God honest truth. And it was talking to, ah, fuck it. It must be, I think it must be Timmy. You know what? I don't even know who I spoke to. Timmy, Adam, one of the legends. I know there was a couple, but It was they listened. They said afterwards, it was like, "That's heavy, Adam." So they said, "But the but I think we can help with a few things," and that's all I fucking needed—a few things. I just wanted some help with something to make me feel. That I was going to do the right thing because you know, as your video said that fucking got me. Nice one. You know, I want to be on your deathbed with a pile of regrets, and that's exactly where I was. I said that so many times. I was regretting my life. I had done nothing with my life except build some money up. Whoop-de-fucking-do! Not taking that to the grave. I had no memories. I had no experiences in my life. And that's all I wanted. And when they, when the boys said, you know, we can't help you with everything, obviously, Aiden, but let's knock down the basics. Let's get these basics down. I think we can help you. And I think this program is going to be right for you. All I needed was someone to take The wheel for that five fucking minutes and let me escape and get everything out. Because once you get everything out, and these guys have seen like the guys on the end of those calls, they're fucking amazing, you know? And they're not just salesmen; they are fucking members. And I know each and every one of them. They have gone through the shit. And they're there for you, and they only want the best. And you've done it out on our in our very first podcast at the end. You said, "I'll see you on the next one. Let's make this annually." And fucking that was it. Someone actually believed in me when I was fucking up all the time. My wife didn't believe in me. My kids didn't believe in me. Fucking no one did. Except these guys that, you know, you come into this ecosystem and you're like, holy shit, where do I even start? But they've got your back. They can let you rest for a little while and then you can keep fucking charging ahead. So yeah, man, that was a That was sort of, sort of that one. Hey, yeah.

I, uh, would love to know about the poetry, man. You talk about charging ahead and how's that going? You still diving into that or?

Man, I, um, in the process. So I've actually, we've, so at the start of the year, I, um, actually went to a publishing place. So I've probably got about 45 sort of poems that I want to put into a book. Um, and that's what I want to leave behind, I guess, for people to sort of remember me by. Um, and yeah, look, I, uh, I made a couple of mistakes. I thought I paid the whole damn thing, but I only ended up paying the deposit. So look, I'm nearly there. So it's gonna be, I dunno, 3 months or something until they're out. So look, poetry is a way for me to just to get, get things out. I always, you know, I've got an older brother. It's just, you don't mention poetry to your older brother cuz mate, the punches and kicks just keep coming and the teasing. Yeah. So yeah, I, um, it's a big thing for me. It's a huge, huge thing. So, um, yeah, I, I really do love it. Definitely.

Do you have a, you have one you'd like to share with us, mate, or, or do we need to wait for the book?

Um, look, I'm, I'm, um, I'm happy to share one. Yeah, let me just let me just grab one up. I think this one was the cozy one, man. So it's titled again "I Rise." I was thirty-two when the world split open. A quiet room, doctor's tone, suddenly, and suddenly the future shrank to the size of a heartbeat. My own fragile, uncertain. But even then in the dark, I could feel them small hands searching for mine. A wife's steady warmth pressed against the chaos, reminding me that love is louder than fear. The nights were long. Scar tissue on the soul takes time to heal. But every morning my kids would burst into the day like sunrise with legs, and I remembered what living is for. She held me up. The woman who saw the man I'd forgotten I was lifted me piece by piece until I stood again. Without shaking. And then the brothers, the high-performance fathers, men who refused to let each other fall. They carried part of that weight when mine was too heavy. They sharpened me, reminded me that strength is not always raw. Sometimes it whispers. Relax, we've got you. Now I live slow and I live full, breathing in the ordinary miracles. A laugh from down the hall, a message from the boys when the days get rough. I am you, still here. Life tastes different now. Richer, warmer, real. I survived cancer, but more than that, I came back to life. Through them, for them, with them. And every sunrise I whisper, not in fear, but in gratitude, again I rise. That's it, bro. That's me in a nutshell, and the the brotherhood. That's life. That's my life.

It's very special, man. Very special. We are. It's not even a joke. We laugh and say same time next year.

Yeah. Yeah. Within a few months, I guess.

Within a few years.

Yeah. Look, life gets busy, but—

Time is good. Spring, new life.

Uh,

it's

beautiful up here, you know, living back in Queensland is stunning, you know, uh, I don't miss the southern, southern end of the world, but, uh, Sorry to everyone that lives there, but

yes, that's beautiful where you are, man. What do you want to? What do you? What do you want to be telling me, Aiden, next time that we sit down again?

Hey, I've got a huge goal for next year. I don't know if I want to tell people yet, but look, let's let's make it accountable. I'm um. I want to do a marathon with my dad from WA. He knows who he is. And yeah, that's that's my goal for next year. But look, I just hey, I just want to say that I'm here and I've fucking achieved a million things that I never thought I would have. Like this year, it's still not over. So a few months until the end of the year, and I have. Too much to achieve. Mate, I'm gonna— yeah, I'm not sure what I'm gonna say, but it's gonna be a fucking ripper. I'll tell you that. It should be good. Hopefully I have bigger shoulders, you know? I think that's it. As long as I can get as big as Ed, I'll be happy, alright?

And jiu-jitsu champion so you can wrestle your son, mate, and sort him out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, mate. I think I might have to hire someone for that. Mate, he's way too big. Yeah, it's awesome though. I absolutely love it, man. Um, yeah, yeah, it's great.

Nah, it's gold, man. Look, it's been, uh, it's been a beautiful episode, Aidan, and, and, uh, mate, countless little golden nuggets of wisdom. But, uh, but every year, you know, that, that poem was so inspirational too, man. But every year you, you know, you leave us with, um, final thoughts, food for thought, wisdom, advice. And I guess I'd love to give you the floor, mate, as we wrap up this session, um, before our next one, which I've already got in the calendar, mate. I just sent you an invite, 365 Days Real. Thank you. But, uh, can't wait for that one. But, um, but also, uh, I can, because what you keep reminding me of, because most of the things fellas have not learned, they're just reminders, is, uh, to honor the day and honor the moment and the now. So, uh, even that saying I can't wait for our 4th one, I absolutely can because I want to embrace, uh, 365 opportunities, uh, and seeing you in person as well, which I'll see you at the summit, mate, which I'm looking forward to. But, um, yeah, I'd love, I'd love for you to leave us with, uh, any final thoughts, mate, or Or, or a big golden nugget or any, anything that you feel compelled to share with the men as we wrap this up. But, uh, but I thank you for giving the time though, mate. It's been awesome.

Yeah, look, man, I appreciate, um, you letting me back on, man. Um, you know, I've, uh, I met a few guys now that have listened to my first podcast and that to me is, you know, just like Pete waving. It's just whatever I can do and, you know, someone saved me. So I'll help out as many people as I can. Um, look, I think the final thoughts, um, uh, I wrote down a quote the other day. Let me grab it. Hmm. And this was just, it, it, it hit me like a ton of bricks and, you know, look, it might hit someone, it might not, but it's gonna hit the right person. Um, I stopped becoming the man everyone else expects and started becoming the man I respect. And I just think, you know, there's so much outside influence and it's so hard to let go, so hard to ask for help as a man, but you have to do it. If you are staring at yourself in the mirror and you do not respect yourself, you've got to get back up and you've got to show up every single day. Um, you know, I've watched my children grow over a time that I never thought I would, it would happen. I've rebuilt broken parts of myself over this time. I've learned how to serve. I've learned how to slow down and I've learned how to be present. And those 3 things I'd say are huge. Slow down, serve, and be present. They're 3 big takeaways that I think everyone should really have a think about. The more you serve, The more you learn, the more you give back, it really levels you up more and more. You know, it's— life isn't about taking, it's about giving. And when you flip that around, it's, um, life's so much more beautiful, bro. So much more beautiful.

Yeah. Couldn't agree more. It's, it blows me away how much you actually get when you give. It really does. Powerful one to finish on. We're lucky to have you with us, mate.

Appreciate it.

Appreciate you, man. And, uh, as always, hope you guys got great value out of this one too. I certainly did. I got a whole page here of notes, as I do from our sessions, mate. Yeah, appreciate you, man. Thank you guys. Thanks, Aidan.

Very welcome.

Thanks, guys. Well, that wraps up another episode. And just as we wind this down, I want you to just reflect and think back through some of the golden nuggets, some of the revelations, some of the sore Some of the things that might have hit home with you, and then just look at ways that you can apply a different set of actions to change your position, change your circumstances, change your feelings, and change the facts. These episodes are done with your best interest at heart, and there's always something we can get from that. Maybe it's not the first time, maybe it's the second time. We've had members listen to episodes four or five times, and then it finally clicks. But either way, I hope you got a lot of value. Value out of this. And also, if this is something that you really want to solidify inside of your life, repetition is the key. You've listened to it. Write down your revelations, think about them, read them, speak them, believe in the changes that you will carve out in the action plan of those revelations to create change in your life, and then share that. And when you teach, you learn the second time, right? So teaching and showing this to others you love and care about is the greatest way that you can remember And make sure you consistently learn and relearn what is it's true and what is it is important to you in your heart. Take care, have an amazing day, night, weekday, weekend, and I'll see you for another one soon. Cheers.