31. Fireman Sam (Drew)

And dad jokes. Where'd you start those?

I don't know. I've always had dad jokes. I had two good teachers.

Crack up.

They drive eight menthol now.

Yeah. I dropped one the other day and.

She just looked at me and went, really?

Yes, yes, really. That's awesome. Dad jokes. Dad jokes is where we're at. Got any for us now?

No, nothing of something.

Isn't that funny?

Yeah, yeah. I'm on show.

We're recording. We're recording. We're in. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen. We've got Drew McKenna with us. Fellow dad. Hence the dad joke reference. Although maybe we need to pick up our game bit. My dad used to have about eight dad joke books next to him, so where he sat on the toilet. Time well invested, I'm sure. But Drew joining us today. Drew's a phenomenal athlete. Does his best. Joining me in the. In the headquarters, the RDM headquarters and wanted to talk and share his story today. He does do training mixture well crossfit predominantly.

Yes.

Yeah. And he's been in the forest for essentially 20 years, which is pretty cool. Just told me then I knew he'd been a fire, but it's a long time, man.

It is.

I've seen a lot of things.

Yeah, yeah. Fair bit it actually it. It was confronting when you said it's been nearly 20 years and I. Wow. Yeah, I've been doing this a long time. Started out with the Bushies back when I was hiding in 99 and then got in the full time brigades at March in 07.

Yeah.

Quite a journey.

Never looked back since.

No, not at all. Straight in. Onwards and upwards.

Yeah. Unreal. So. And obviously father as well.

Yep, yep. Little girl. She's five and keeps me on my toes. Keeps me and the missus on the toes. She's a lot like me. So she.

She can.

We can go toe to toe pretty well.

She's got good dad jokes as well.

Well, I don't know about dad jokes but she can. She's got plenty of fire in her belly anyway.

Look at that one. That's important. Yeah, that's what I try and help raise Stella and well Lillian as she gets a bit older with. It's important for them to have that. So fire is for 20 years. It's pretty amazing, man. Any close calls? Many. Nay a few.

Had a few back when with the Bushies where fires got away on you and or other crews have done things that have. It's just contributed to a perfect storm kind of thing and you end up in the wrong Spot at the wrong time, had others where you don't actually know the severity of the job until later on when you look back at it and you go, oh, I probably shouldn't have done that. But at the time, because the level of training that we have and PPE and all that kind of thing, you, you get there and you go, well, I'm prepared for it. This is my job. I'll put my hand up to do it. And with the training and everything that we have, it's enough to. You look at the risk and it's calculated risk where I look at a lot of other things and I go, I'm never doing that. I'm never going to go and bungee jump off a bridge because it's a perfect bridge. Why would I go and do that? But then I'll go into a burning house because I'm trained for it and for me it's calculated risk. I can control to, to a degree. What, my own safety as well. Yeah, yeah. So I've had a few where roofs come down on you on. When you're in the middle of a job and a roof comes down or you get hit with roof tiles and things like that, a few explosions and, and electrical things. But it's not until later on that you go, whoa, yeah, I probably shouldn't.

Have done that or what.

We did what we had to do and then it did get pretty warm inside and that kind of thing.

So, yeah. Unreal, man. Funny you talk about the heat. I went away last week out to a little farm area and we created a little fire pit to roast some marshmallows and the wind changed direction and it was really warm really quickly on my legs, my arms and my face. It was actually too much for Stella and she was behind me, which made me think. I can't remember when, but there was one time where I felt the true heat of a flame and it really gave me the idea of the magnitude. Like if an entire tree was on fire.

Right.

You can feel that pretty far away, can't you?

Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely.

It's unreal, man. Like, what happens with.

How hot does it get when you're.

In jobs or houses? All these things, they vary in temperature.

From anywhere between 100 degrees to 600, 700 degrees. Bushfires can get a little bit more intense and they're wind driven, so it can jack up again. But yeah, it's hot. It's like it's not survival.

What are the suits designed to?

They're designed for radiant heat off the top of my head, I couldn't tell you what the actual degrees is, what the braking strain and all that sort of stuff is for them. But they do take a lot of, a lot of the radiant heat out of it and stop you from burning, obviously and flash over flash burns and all that kind of thing. So it does take a lot out of it. And with this stuff that we have now, even though it's hot as on the inside, because it doesn't let the metabolic heat out, you're sweating the whole time. It's kind of a false sense of security compared to the older stuff that we had where the older stuff would touch your arm and you go, oh man, that's hot. Because you'd feel the heat a bit more through it. The stuff now you don't feel the heat so much, so you're kind of in an environment that you're not designed to be in. And if you're not careful, you can be in there too long or, or you could be in a position where it's too hot for you. You should be coming out now. So it's one of those catch 22 things where you gotta really be aware of your surroundings and what you're doing.

How do you gauge that then?

Just training, whether you're in or not. My training experience.

Yeah. Seeing the flames or the types of fires and on it can be X amount.

Yeah, yeah. You get there and when you turn up to a job, you look at the job as to what the conditions are as well. Is it wind driven, what's the heat coming out, what's the flame heights and all that kind of thing. So it's not just you rock up, you go bowling in through the front door and you do the job and you get home. There's some jobs where you turn up and you go, I can't go into that. So then you're outside and you put it out from the outside. Well, there's ways now that we can kind of knock down the initial risk and then go inside after we've knocked it down a little bit and taken the heat and fire out of it a bit before. Even before we go inside the pool.

How big is the team usually? All varies?

Yeah, it varies. All the stations where I'm at now all have four on a truck. So you'll have a motor driver, a station officer and two firys. And then from the escalation of the job, depends on how many trucks turn up as well. So all trucks will have at least four. Unless it's a rescue specialist. Rescue or a specialist aerial appliance or hazmat. And they generally run with two. So they'll run with the pump. So you'll have the four guys there anyway. Plus the two extras.

Yeah, fair enough. These, mate. Pretty. Pretty impressive stuff when you break it all down and what you actually do to get the result.

Yeah.

And the outcome that's needed to obviously save lives and control the damage. But love to know why you got into that. But actually going back even before that, mate, and just sharing a bit of your story with like growing up and whatnot and some of the different challenges and adversities that you've been through that have led to, you know, where you are now and in between why you got into the fieries.

It's one of them things. I was always the kid that wanted to be a firey and I don't know why. I was like three years old and wanted to be a firey and that's all I ever wanted to do. Remember Mum and dad's place was virtually backed onto bushland or was crossroad from the bush. So whenever we did have bushfires, it was when I was a kid, I was terrified, but I think it was more the adrenaline and I didn't know how to control the adrenaline when I was a kid. Like you'd be standing there watching, crying your eyes out, but going, I still want to do that at the same time. And that just sort of carried through. So that was my end game for my whole career was to try and be a career fiery and get from where I had to be to there along the way. I grew up in the 90s, so that was when everyone turned around and said that fat was bad. So everything was low fat fat stuff. But then they jacked up the sugar and everything. And it wasn't a lot of education around meal sizes and stuff either. Portion sizes. So I became a bit of a big kid growing up. It wasn't that the food that I was eating was bad, it was more the portion size. And in that era, in the 90s, mom would go, I'm doing the right thing because I'm getting the low fat stuff. But she didn't know how to read a nutritional label. And nutrition like mob didn't tell you that they were actually removing the fat and putting the sugar in. So I ended up a heavy kid. I was 18, 21. I topped out at 120 kilos at 5:10. So it's not kind of too good in that was I always played footy, but then with the footy culture came drinking beers and all that sort of stuff after training, after footy pies and whatever you could get your hands on to eat kind of thing, and the info wasn't there. So I was a heavy guy, but I always had that goal of being in the fire brigade, and I had to get to 96 on the beat test and had to pass these fitness tests. So I started slowly chipping away at that to try and get the weight down, try and get faster, try and get past the fitness tests and all that kind of thing. It took me a long time to get into the job, but when I did, I weighed 100 kilos when I first got in, and now I weigh 84. And just through information, doing my own research, training and my nutrition and being picked on as a kid, being a fat kid, I don't want my daughter to have to go through that either. And I'd never want anyone that I know or, or anyone at all to have to go through that either as a kid or as an adult. So. And it's a place where, and you know yourself, you've always got that inner fat kid. So even though you look svelte on the outside and you might look amazing, you still feel like a fat kid.

From time to time on the inside. Excuse me. Yeah, you're right. No, it's true. It's true, man. Like, I. It's funny, I was last summer, so it was probably about 12 months ago now, or just under, or walking the dogs. Go for a walk as a family, because I live near the beach. And yes, someone yelled out, put a shirt on your fat seat. And I couldn't believe it. I still got that little initial. It was a shock as well. Someone yelling very loud, the car hooting past, but still got that initial little jolt. And I'm in not bad shape now. I was in phenomenal shape then. Coming up, getting ready for the. The CrossFit Open, which will be soon. I was in probably almost the best shape I'd ever been. I've just won a couple of comps, too, and I still got that little fat boy inside going, maybe you should.

Be a bit skinnier.

Unreal.

Hey, even now, as you say, you go to the gym and you strip the shirt off because you sweat and then you go, this is too hot. I've got to ditch it later on every so often. Oh, yeah, just put a shirt on. You just put some weight on and it's all ingest. But the little fat kid inside goes, oh, come on, man.

Yeah, exactly. I've copped it up in this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've been copying this shit for 30 years. Come on, give me a break.

Exactly. Haven't I showed it now? Bertlan stripes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's funny, you actually sent me a picture the other day. And you went to school with Kate.

Yeah.

When did you actually link up and start courting? Because I think you said you had a crush on her. Did you? During school?

Yeah, I crushed it. Crushed on her hard when I was about 14.

I don't know if she's going to be listening to this.

Even if she doesn't listen to it, she gives me heaps about it.

That's right.

I'm just totally honest with her and I've told her that. And I said, oh yeah, actually I always thought you're a good sort. And oh yeah. And here we are down the line. We didn't meet back up again until 2007, about September, I think. But we went to school together, went our separate ways, lived our own different lives and we had a lot of mutual friends together, but we weren't quite friends as much like ourselves. I wouldn't go to her birthday party and she wouldn't come to my birthday party kind of thing, but we had mutual friends. I was always really good friends with her little brother Rick. And I always say this, that he had a ulterior motive to get us together for years because we'd go for beers and that and he'd always tell me what Kate was up to and he'd always tell me keep what I was up to. Even though we're living different lives, still going our own different ways. And the night that we caught up and met back up again. She was moving to Sydney that weekend and I said, oh, there's a few guys from school and that down there now. So here's me number, let me know, we'll catch up and like it'll give you a network basis. She goes, oh yeah, cool.

No worries.

And then history down the line, this is where we are. And it was actually that Rick was out drinking with Kate that night that we. I ran into him and that's how we all ended up intertwined again. So I even said that on our wedding night too. I went, rick, stand up. It's probably your fault that we're all standing here now. So it was quite bizarre, especially when you tell people that you went to school together and they think that you've been together since school or a long time and you go no, for nearly 10 years we just went Our own way and then ended up. Let's just see how it went. So.

Yeah, it's amazing, isn't it?

I'm very lucky. Yeah, Very, very lucky.

And you said little one, she's five.

Five, yeah.

So here we are, mate. You've gone. You've always wanted to be in the forries and probably when you're in the. Yeah. Still had to work your way in like you said, with performance and he knows. Well, yeah, the tests are.

Mate. Oh yeah.

You need to cover to get into.

Yeah, there's a lot. But in each stage it took me maybe four or five years, maybe five goes to get in. And at that stage it was every two years that they were recruiting. So you get knocked back one time and then you get so far through the next time and then you get knocked back and then it was kind of like a. I just kept going until war of attrition. I went no, this is my job and I'm gonna get there. And so I just pushed it and got there.

Was good. Yeah, that's awesome. What were you doing in the meantime?

I had a few different jobs. I was started out as a gas fitting apprentice. It used to be. Used to be. I'm trying to think I've had that many names but it was the old gas company, old agl and I worked with in conjunction with them and a training division and so I became a gas feeder with them and then gas fitter and then went from that into home installations. So like your domestic installation from the mains to the meters, did a lot of stuff with regulate regulator and meter maintenance and all that kind of thing and mains maintenance when I was with the gas company. But I ended up in the domestic side of it and the installations to the. To the meters finished that and went into fire mitigation role at Lake Macquarie Council where I was just on the crew there. We'd go and put in firebreaks and fire trails and stuff and maintain those. That was a good job. I did that for a few years and ended up a team leader there when one of the other guys moved on and I kind of hit the glass ceiling. That's as far as I could get for a long time because we only had a crew of like four guys or five guys. So that was as far as I could get without having to branch into another crew. But my passion lied within that fire protection and that's where I love doing the job. I love being out in the bush, love being outside and working with the crew that we had was really good as well. So that was a really good time in my life. But like I say, I hit that glass ceiling and I went right out. Fire brigade came up again. I went, I'm going to apply. And that was when I got in that time in 07.

Yeah, right.

Yeah.

And then soon after then you would have met Kate.

Yeah, it was. So that was March 07, and then Kate and I met up again in September of O7 or thereabouts.

All coming together, mate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little boy who could.

Yeah, yeah, pretty much. You get there and like, if you look back on it now, you go, I got everything that I wanted when I was a kid and so how good is life going? But then you, if you take the snapshot, you go, okay, that's what I wanted then. That's what I've got now. But then the hard work that went through to get to that point was incredible. And so many twists and turns and ups and downs and it just shows that, well, it was only sort of fortune that we met back up that night with Kate and I. But everything else leading up to that point got the job, got everything else that I wanted. I was goal driven and that's what I wanted. So I wasn't going to stop until that's where I want, but got to. So I just made everything else work around it. You get your setbacks and then you go, okay, regroup, go again. And it's like life with everything. You just go, okay, I ate a shit sandwich this week, but next week will be fine. Or it all comes back around eventually. Whether it's next week, next year, but it all comes back.

It's fascinating, man. Credit to you for sticking the course and staying resilient with it when most, well, almost certainly most people give in or pack it in or settle for something and mate, talk to us about. Because those who aren't watching and listening. Drew's rocking the RDM shirt. He's one of our coaches now. He's our mindset coach and does a phenomenal job in helping the boys realign with what they need to do depending on the stimulus or what they're exposed to, which is the environment, isn't it? Like, there's so many things happening all the time to us with our work, our families, all these micro transitions. And it's hard work. Like, yeah, of course we get the guys fit and strong, but it all comes down to the real estate between the years. And that's why we love having Drew on board and where you're at and to get to that, which is. It's pretty amazing how that's worked as well, really, when I look back on how we've come together. But fatherhood, man, like, what's it like? Tell us about, like, when you became a dad, what was it like? And up to now.

Okay, well, always wanted to be a dad, even growing up. You go, I'll probably be okay at this and look forward to it. And then the reality hits. It's hard work. It's real hard work. And it's more getting your head around what you have to do, not just for yourself, but also for your wife, for the child, for the family as a whole. And then you ride the waves of. And the troughs of what's going on now. Every day is different with a kid, especially when they're really little. Like, one day you go, beauty, I've got their routine nailed. And then the next day they throw you the biggest curveball and you go, that work yesterday, I don't understand. Why are you screaming at me? And so that was really hard. And also being a shift worker, for me myself, the hardest part was being home a lot and not really having that outlet. I was home, my message went back to work. And so you just said, you're the dad with the kid in the park, the sole dad, and you got all the mum's groups. But there's quite a. Even now. And it's changed a lot since we've had Addison. But even now there's still that stigma and we're blokes, not blokes. But society looks at you like, why are you home with your kid? And even the other day we went to the shops, I'm doing the groceries. We do it every Thursday. And, oh, daddy's babysitting today. No, I'm not babysitting. I'm being a parent. And it's my child, it's my choice to have a child. I'm not babysitting someone else's kid, it's mine. And just that mindset that society still has towards it. I really struggled with that when I was especially early days. And even up until she was probably maybe three, it was hard for me to. You'd go out and do things. And even when she was able to go to the bathroom by herself, you go, right, you need to go to toilet, Beauty. You go to the carers or the parents room and you still looked at like, what are you doing in here? Kind of thing. And, well, my kid needs to talk, man.

Like, come on.

And so that's more society. Stuff that I struggled with and the different waves that you have to ride with children all the time. Because, as I say, every day's a roller coaster. And look her. And I'll go toe to toe the next day. It's like nothing ever happened. Or even 10 minutes later.

You could be screaming at each other.

One minute and then 10 minutes later, it's fine, it's all done. And I love you, Daddy.

Okay, Where'd that come from? It's like a massive gut check out of the history.

You just go, wow, I don't understand. But okay, you hated me a minute ago.

That's right.

And I know it's just going to keep going through that cycle for years, but it's just more trying to get your head in perspective as to what's going on with the kids and that. So I really struggled with that.

Yeah. And it's something we don't really understand, do we? Because we rarely have memories below five or four. But it's unreal, the changes they go through. Crazy what they go through. Their hormones are pill. Think puberty is bad. So what's going through there? Because Stella, my daughter, at the moment's three, she's on her way. And Lily, in six months, she'll be following suit. It's just, yeah, that. The change in emotions, like the hormones, teething, what they go through, the growth, growing pain.

Ah, it's unreal, isn't it? It's unreal. And then you sit, Sit there and you think, imagine stuff that happens and the stuff. The stuff they do, it frustrates you. Frustrates me.

Frustrates your wife.

And you get there and you go, imagine what it's doing for them. They grow exponentially, especially in that first sort of two years. And they still grow pretty quick after that, but for so long, they just go like they're this big and then they're this big. And then imagine how much agony they'd be in. And they're learning things all the time and they can see things and they're tasting things and listening and you just go, wow. Yeah. Must just blow their minds.

It's unreal, isn't it? Because they don't know. They don't even know what the concept of patience is. They haven't been here as long as us to develop more, build out that level of, you know, just sticking it out or seeing it through resilience, like I've said earlier. But they're very little.

They're egocentric little being, and they want it now.

I grew up with Brothers. So I had no idea when it comes to Stella. And now I got another girl. I'm not sure what to do except just a few arm curls and keep some weapons in the house. That's about it, ladies.

I think I'll be fine. She's got enough spunk that she'll just take down anybody.

Yeah, that's good. That's what I'm trying to gear Stella up for. To the point where me and Krina probably feel sorry for the blood she brings home.

We had that joke at the gym the other day, and she sat down at the table and one of the guys said, what are you gonna do when, like, she's 15, 16 and boys are hanging around, I don't have to worry about it. And they go, why? And I went. And I can't remember what I. What I did or what I said. And she bit at me straight away and went. And I went.

See? Case in point.

I don't need to worry about anything. I feel sorry for the poor bastard. He must have his wits about him.

Absolutely cracker. Yeah. So I'm curious. Those who don't know too much about rdm, it's a coaching group that is. That we have now that's growing. And obviously with rdm, most of you guys know if you've been following me, what I'm about, and the vision behind helping fathers create a shift. And it's just really bizarre how it came about, because Drew's name was always familiar, like, your name was always familiar. And I think it's because you shared and supported all the CrossFit comps I'd done over the years. And you messaged me here and asking questions about it and whatnot, trying to rally people to do it.

Not when you smash Randy.

That was it. He saw me once at Regional in tights, and that was love. That's right. Should have worn undies under the tights.

Or courtesy pants, patch the holes in.

The back, wear and tear points.

It was a wear and tear.

As part of the outfit called the Arseless Pants. Clutchless panties. Yeah, it was really funny. And then when IBM started to build and grow, engaged more and more with that and caught up, met in person, and now I'd say the rest is history. But I'd love to just hear on your end, from your perspective, what's drawn you into what's now looking to become, you know, a flourishing movement and also opportunity to work together to deliver a different scope or lens for dads to see and get the support they need. Like what Led you to that man. Like, I'm not saying, you know, why do you like me or love rdm? And led to that. I'm not looking for praise in that respect, but just being drawn towards a vision or a movement or something that you feel connected to.

It's more that, especially being like yourself, a reasonably fit dad. And you see so many people that we went to school with or our age, and they look 10 years older or they're overweight, they're going through the motions. Some of them hate life, or not that they hate life, but they're just not exactly happy. And RDM is shifting that away from dad bod. Why do you need dad bod? Why can't. If you want to be. Why can't you be ripped like Arnie? If that's what you want and you can manage to fit that in with the rest of your life, well, then you do it. And it's more about having that dad life balance so that you're not busted and destroyed. At 60, you see so many guys that are, you know that they're ill and you just can tell by looking in their face and you go, okay, I haven't seen you in 10 years, but you look sick. And just because you can tell the health in their faces and they might not be in a good head space either. And I've lost a few guys that I know to mental issues. And I went, well, there needs to be a way to fix that. Where you've got everything starting to line up, where you have your nutrition, which is tailored to each person. You, you got your exercise, which is the same, and you get there. And I've seen a lot of your videos where you worked on getting your head right and you do make sure that it's down to them. The person has to have that, not a killer instinct, but they need to have that attitude to get after it themselves and to make themselves better and to bring themselves above the line so they're not just getting sucked into the usual KFC 9 to 5, I'm eating shit, I'm turning out shit. And this is what life's supposed to be like. Life is supposed to be so much better and so much more than that. And that lined up with a lot of stuff. Growing up with my dad, dad was always really good at getting out there every weekend. We were always outside doing stuff, whether it was helping him with the yard or he'd take us on the bikes and all that kind of thing, because Mum worked mostly weekends. So we always made sure that we're fed.

Right.

But we go out and do fun stuff and had that balance between sucking the shit sandwich and having a great life. And so I got there and I see so many guys and been in a bit of a dirty headspace myself when Addison first came along.

I see so many people stuck there.

And you need to get them people unstuck. There's so many dads that are just sitting there and going. Because you take so much on as a dad, you go, even you take on all the stresses of yourself. You take on all the financial stresses of not just yourself, but the family, and you take on all the extra stuff that compounds from being a dad. As, you know, like, okay, I've been at work for 24 hours, but then I come home and now I've got to put the washing on, now I've got to do this, now I've got to do that. And then if you don't set your mind right, it'll just feel like it just compounds and everything just gets on top of you and you go, I don't really enjoy this. And so you go, well, there's an answer here. There's a way out of that. And why can't we help guys turn that around?

Yeah. Not to mention lacking that connection as well. You got all those roles and then still your relationship.

Exactly. And how many people do you see that don't really have a relationship with their misses it's like two ships passing the night. Or there's plenty of people out there that don't even sleep in the same room. Or the dad's asleep in the lounge all night because he's tired from working. And she's in. She's put the kids to bed and all the other stressors have worked on it and they're on tenorhooks. And I'm incredibly lucky with my wife. We're on the same page for virtually everything and we're in a really good place. So we just get there and go, why can't that. Why can't everyone have that? And for us, we understand that things get in the way, but we go, why isn't everyone. You have your ups and downs, but essentially you still you guys and you still. You're still you and you're still the couple and you're still the partner. And then you also now adapt, but there's no reason why that all kind of melding together and become one rather than having it all split up all over the place and you're not happy with anything.

There's some hard Truths too, man. Like, it's like, I don't got that much flak. Sometimes I do with some of my ads or my videos, when I talk about not having sex, not respecting yourself or looking in the mirror and feeling like a flop and all these different things. Like, this is real, man. I'm going off the data. When I'm having conversations and talking to dads and a lot of them are in tears and down about their whole life. It's like, well, this is the shake. The shake up or shake down in shifting the state and not just being the whole, oh, yeah, you're okay. It's just. Yeah, it just is what it is. And accepting that instead of going, like you said, the time it comes around, you're 60, you're falling apart, marriages have broken down. Did they need to. You're living a life with regret. Did you need to. You've not connected with your kids who are now either teenagers or adults. Did it have to be that way? Not necessarily. And this is for 99%. There's always variables and things we don't control, but 99.99% of it, mate, there's always a way. And it's funny. Like, I'm 34. You just turned 38. Yeah, I'm 34. And some people look at. Ah, yeah, you're 34. You're still young. Well, yeah, you might be 50 or 60. Do you remember when you're 34? Yeah, you do. That's how quick it is. I already know how quick it's going to go and it's probably going to happen quicker than that. Oh, yeah, it's going to fly, you know. Yeah, look, we have pretty good. Because we're in it all the time with shifting the real estate and the six inches between the ears and whatnot. And I got a pretty good understanding of myself and awareness and realizing the value of time and I like to the nth degree and I still feel that's off the mark. All these other people just, just become in the rut. And you just. Yeah, you just said, dad, well, no, you're a man who has all these additional pressures and burdens in our lives falling apart and what are you doing? And credit to you, mate, for seeing that gap and looking to want to, you know, move into a space where it's something that needs to be done and said where. I don't know about you, but I personally don't feel there's enough out there for dads with real impact.

Not really, no. There's nothing really, except for maybe a few places where you can go and have a vent, but there's no actual way of going, okay, what can we do to help you fix that? What can we. Like you say you might be 20 kilos overweight, you've got no energy, so you go to the gym, but what about the rest of the stuff that goes along behind that as well? So they've only fixed one part of that. Or you go and catch up and you might have a dozen blokes that go and get Barbie, have a Barbie every week or every fortnight, okay? But you're only having a Barbie and you just have an event and having a bitch about the kids. And Mrs. In your situation you're actually doing, there's no plan in place to make that greater and change that so that in two weeks time you come back and you're still pissing and moaning about the same stuff. So there's got to be something more done to be able to go, okay, yeah, put my hand up, I'm a little overweight, I'm a little dude, my head space isn't good. Mrs. And I don't talk enough, we don't connect, we don't communicate. I've got the shits with the kids, I'm not happy with my job and all that sort of stuff. Why can't you change it? Why do you have to be happy? Or it's happy because you're not happy. Why do I need to do that? Just because society has turned it into that. What can't I be great? What can't I go, okay, you know what? Yep, I've lost that weight, but now my mental state still isn't great or I'm still not communicating with the missus or whatever. So going to the gym is fine, but that's only got me half part of the way there. It's a full journey to come full around. And as you know, if the motivation drops off, then the gym drops off and the gym drops off, then you're back around the same cycle when you're back in the pit where you were. And so all the work you've done to climb out because it's only one rung of the ladder, you slip back down again.

It's a great way to explain it. So true as well, because you can flip that and go, I don't even do any training, but I really work on myself mentally and I'm in a really good place mentally. But how long can you hold onto that if you're. And I don't care how much better weight. But if you're 20, 30, 40 kilos overweight, physiologically you're not tapping into what you can become and your energy output and everything lacks might be better than when you were 60 kilos overweight. Still not going to put you in an optimal level of being. And when that temporary motivation, looking up quotes, watching some YouTube clips, when that borrowed certainty disappears, the shell is just remaining with something that again, like you said, you've only squared away one place and it's come back. And I'm back to the old person, the old version. And that's a big thing, mate. And the reason why RDM is the best. And I'm not saying. And this isn't opinions, it's results. And what we're doing is because we listen. Like everything people, everything you guys see out there is a result in feedback from data listening. We can do training programs. I was speaking to you about this earlier. We can employ the best nutritionists in the country and they can prescribe something. Is the dad going to action it? Have you connected? Do you know what time he wakes up, when he goes to sleep, what he does for work? When is he going to do some exercise? Morning, night, how's his body? What's his circumstances? Right now, when you listen and you look at all that, you get everything around what's necessary. With the dads, we've got an amazing approach with the nutrition, which is unique and it's everything in how it's encompassed around their life, which means it's personalized and achievable based on the stage of where they're at, based on what they weigh, the results, the outcomes, what they're looking to achieve. Which means I don't need a degree in dietetics or be a naturopath or nutritionist to understand that it comes down to connection. Right? And when you get that connection and there's purpose behind that connection, context, like you said, you can square away all areas, not just get fit in the gym, but your home life still sucks. You don't understand what it means to enter different environments and you can't connect with the missus and you've got a short temporary. It's all of it. That's what we encompass. How have you found RDM so far from a coach's point of view in seeing what we do, what you do, and also so much of what's left to be done as well?

Yeah, there is a lot, a lot to do. There's a lot of work there, working with the guys to get them to a point where they're consistently going to be kicking goals. And even to the point where the guys have flat spots, they go, man, this is. I'm not sure if this is for me. And you go, okay, but just stop and look back where you were. You're having a bad day today, but look at where you were 12 months ago. How does that compare to where you are today? They go, oh, yeah, you're right. There's. It's amazing. And you go, okay, so something's working. Yep. Beauty. And I like getting the feedback from reading all the data and when the guys put their entries and stuff in to be able to say, okay, you know what, I had a bad week this week with my food, but I'm picking it up now. And then, even with the mindset stuff, and they go, oh, I really struggled this week with this. But I've also identified from what we've been talking about and the videos and all that sort of stuff, if I do this, then it starts to pick up. Or I've actually tried this technique in my training and that's what's happened. I've noticed a massive change here and even just put positive mindset change and even if it's only once a day, it's enough. The guys are going, oh, actually this is okay, this is good. And it's when I sit back and I'll read that, and I go, yes, they're getting above the line. This is amazing. They're not sitting there getting sucked into the pit because they're there going, nah, you know what? I've had a bad day. I've taken the hit and now I know how to be a bit more resilient and get through it. And watching the guys just smashing their training and guys that want to lose weight, their main goal is to lose weight and they're losing a heap of weight, but then they're backing that up by building muscle and that kind of thing too. And guys that are not only cleaning up their own diets, but that's flowing back through to the family. So that way, the next generation now is going to be a lot healthier straight away because they're not eating at McDonald's 27 times a week, they're not eating at KFC. It's okay for once every so often, but you need to make sure that you've got a decent diet cleanish. You can still have little bits and pieces here and there if you wish, but the idea is context and being able to put the. To build that standard, we'll call it the gold standard. Where you want to be to be able to show the kids and their kids and the generations after that how to be human and be decent humans. Pardon me, because our time is only 60 to 100 years, if that. So you want to be able to get as much done, as much good done in that time as you can and enjoy it. Rather than, like you said before, looking back with your regrets and going, oh, I should have done this or I should have done that or I wasn't happy with this or why do you not have to be happy? Why can't you just go, okay, I can change something here, whether it's unhappy with the job, okay, I'll change jobs. And as long as you've got a plan in place so that you don't struggle financially, you go, okay, we're going to change shops and bam. I'm not happy with my weight.

I'm going to change that.

I'm not happy with how I think and feel about myself or with the family. I'm going to change that. I'm not happy with the environment that I live or the environmental relationships in different places. And you have, okay, what can I do to change that? If you can't change that, how can you change your own mindset towards something that you can't change? And then that in turn then shifts so that you go, okay, well, I have to accept that because I can't change that, but I can change the way I think of it and feel about it too. And so then that just a full cycle to come back around.

Reckon people can do that on their own?

No, I know I haven't. I've had to put my hand up and go, mate, I need help. And go on and seeing a counsellor about different things that I've had and then plus, which then in turn made me look for a better network of people to confide in and all that kind of thing too. So you got to pick the right people. If you pick someone who lives their life below the line, cruising along, going, yeah, but what about this and what about that? And sucks you down even further. Well, they're not someone that you need to confide in. You need someone that is happy to be able to give you advice, but from a different perspective where you're not in at that point, like a higher perspective.

Spot on, mate. On the money with that. Absolutely. And that's something where I'm doing. I'm going to do a podcast episode shortly about tribes and environment and how important that is as well, but you hit the nail on the head there. Took the words out of our mouth. I was going to talk about standards.

Standards, man.

And yeah, you're right. Like, do you want to have 60 years of impact, influence in this world? I want to have 600 years. Doesn't mean I need to physically be here for that. I want to have 600 years of impact. How about the next five generations? Well, six generations, unless they become superhuman and live for 120 years. And it's mate. A big part of life is about standards. And we reach down and we will.

Help pull you up, but pull you.

Up to a higher standard of being, because we are a byproduct, physically and mentally, of the standards that we set in ourselves. And they can change. You can shift a view of what your standard can and could be and your perception of a standard. But for me, maintaining, like you said, through yourself consistently, is what truly defines what your standard is. Not just for yourself, like you said for your children, when you're passing down that gold standard, which is. That's our monthly mission in our group, actually. Standards and excellence. They are the two buzzwords, the two keys that we're focusing on this month to go, you're here right now. You're all in your own evolutionary journey.

This is the standard that we hit.

Do you need to jump to there in one step? No, we'll show you the way. And your way is different to all these other ways with the underlying principles and foundations that become the tribe, the community. And that's something that's. I don't know, man. Like I said, we listen. I listen. I've listened for trained dads. I'm old school, you know, I've got older brothers. So when I started PTing at 17, I trained dads even though I wasn't one myself. Then I become one. It's like, shit. So I've listened for over 20 years, as well as obviously having a father and being around lots in the gym. And that's why I see it as a whole thing, which you obviously understand. And you do see it now you're in the trenches with us. And it's not just one aspect, is it? It's everything.

It all interflows in together. You can't have one bit without the other.

And that's where, like I said earlier, I just see a big gap. And I think there's a space there right now. Not to things like political correctness or maybe some of the extremities of feminism, but then also what a lot of the Minorities, small, very, very small portion of men did in the, in the 20th century as well. But looking at it all across that, plus our father's fathers and their fathers hitting them and beating them and telling them not to be a little bitch and don't cry, has led to it being a very tough landscape to navigate in the modern world as a. As a man, but then extra again as a father. And I think personally that's why it almost seems to me like no one's really taken the bull by the horns and run with it. Which is why you can see what we do as coaches is maintain that level of tenacity and standard, first by example, second by showing, and third by the father discovering. This isn't just telling you, you know, lecturing. And by holding that standard, yeah, we can break through, but it's not easy, which is why I'm not doing it alone as well.

And that standard, you might set the standard here today, but over time and discipline, the standard is going to be there. So your line is just going to exponentially go up and everything else underneath that, you're going to kind of get there and go, I don't have time to delve and get sucked into that anymore because it just brings you up that little bit further.

Yeah, certainly does, mate. And I love having you in the team with the coaches as well. Got a good, good coaching crew and, you know, where to. What's. What's something that you want to achieve? Like, I'd love to talk about the personal goal. We'll wrap up this episode, mate. It's been awesome having you, but something personal that you want to achieve within yourself and maybe with RDM as well. But moving forward over the next 12 months.

Next 12 months is to help as many blokes out as I can and to help get that. To break that cycle and get them to a better place and to be able to understand that they need to be accountable for their own actions and accountable for their own training and all that kind of thing. But there's also support there for them if they ever need it as well. So you're not just going, oh, man, I can't. Like, you might have a shit day in here.

I can't do this anymore.

And you go, you can, and then you go, I'll tell you why you can, because tomorrow's another day and there's another opportunity to go and chase stuff. And then rather than getting sucked back down the drain, keep your accountability high, stay above that line and work from there. Like we mentioned before, like you go, okay, I'm having a bad day today, but where was I 12 months ago? Your bad day line has already jumped up. So rather than being here where your bad day line was before, now here is a bad day, but you've already grown that much in that time.

Feel like your bad days higher than what your best day was, 12 months.

Yeah. That in turn creates a better and a more functional society. You have a little bit less. Well, it's going to be a lot less sickness and even environmental awareness and all that kind of thing. And you have people that are more attuned to not just their own bodies, but how they interact with everyone else as well. So rather than having massive fights at the lights like they do, especially in Sydney, that guy cut me off. And now they've got lights red.

So what am I going to do?

I'll go and punch him in the face, maybe sit back and go, okay, maybe he didn't see her. Maybe there's a reason why he did that. Or he's not just being a jerk for the sake of being a jerk. There's been a whole cascade of things to get to that point. So just be more aware of that.

Pardon me? Just to kind of be more aware.

That you're not the only being on the planet. And so you're there to set an example for the new ones coming through to be better again.

Absolutely, mate. That's something that will certainly have impact and be reached from that ripple effect through, like I said, helping as many fathers as we can break through the right way. The right way. But this isn't a social group where we get 10,000 together.

If you need a hug, I'll give you a hug, but I'll also give you advice on how to fix it.

Give you some hard truths that you need.

Four months later, if we have the same conversation, I'll go, why are you still crying? I'll give you a hug now if you have the same conversation.

12 months.

Why are you crying? I've given you. I've given you help, and you've done nothing.

Exactly, mate. It's been good having you on, Drew. Thank you. Yeah, thanks for joining us. Hope you guys got very much. Got a lot out of this. Do you have any actually to finish up? Do you have any. Any funny or bizarre stories from the fieries? Something that just was just real funny or stuck out or just a cracker.

Or some stuff we've got to keep confidential?

Fair enough. You do come across some weird things.

That people have been doing to each other. And also some weird toys and things. And you go, okay, I try to think that I have an open mind. And then sometimes you go to work and you get a call and you go, oh, wow, okay, maybe I live in a cave.

I'm not sure.

But you just get there. Yeah. Yeah, that was.

That was interesting.

Yeah, there's some. Definitely some funny stories I can. Tea off air.

The point of that is, guys, that there's only one way to truly toast a marshmallow. Stick with that. Craig, thanks again for jumping on, mate.

It's been awesome.

Good having you and thanks for tuning in, guys. Whether you watch this or listen to it, hope you had a great time and had a ball reach out if there's anything you need or you know what, if you're a guy out there who's looking to join the Florence and you're just struggling, you're not sure what you need, don't have to be a father. But if you ever want some advice or need help or anything, sing out, contact us through RDM and I'll happily chat to Drew about if it's something you want to link up with to get some advice from the main man, the expert. And I'm sure he'd be happy to.

Help out, but the experts are drip under pressure.

But look, enjoy this, mate. It's been good. It's been good chatting about all things related to your life and your journey as well.

Yeah, well, thank you.

Fascinating, mate. Thanks, guys. Have a good day. Night, afternoon, weekend. Whenever you listen to this, if I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening, good night. Is it? Oh, it's the side of stay frosty. Stay frosty. Stay frosty. That doesn't mean eat frosty. Stella had Froot Loops the other day. I was like, it's amazing. Give me some killer. Anyway, thanks, guys. Take care. We'll see you soon.