Episode 264. "I've become the prize my family can't get enough of"

Hey, if you're someone who really connects to this message and you know there's someone out there who needs to hear this, but they're too proud. The walls are up. You can't show them. No worries. Flick them the link, share this podcast, send them the link. They can listen to it in the car, in the comfort of their own home, behind closed doors, in private privacy. Listen, absorb, and you know you are creating impact to change. There are so many people in pain who need to hear this message, who need to empower themselves, take their control and power back and get back in front. Appreciate you all much respect. Enjoy the episode and again, share the love, spread the love and let's create impact and change across the world. Cheer. Strap yourselves in for an episode for the ages. We've got the Australian living Swiss man with a Kiwi accent joining us, Mr. Lee Dorfliger. One of the. One of the most valued and cherished members of H. Well, they're all valued and cherished, so don't take that the wrong way, boys. But yeah, this man is one of our squad leaders with the mighty Titans crushing our Winter Wars Challenge at the moment as well. But a really valued man that I enjoy connecting with and helping. Walk through the gates.

Wow.

Some time ago now, I think you're just about, if not entering into your second season. But we've got Lee Dorflager with us today. He's going to share a fucking unbelievable story. So make sure you watch your eyes, ears and heart and mind open for this one. But Lee, thanks for joining us, man. Looking forward to it.

Yeah, no problem. Yeah, great. Yeah, yeah. Second season now. Yeah, 17th of July. That's when I joined up 2024. So now it's just entering second season. Loving it, actually. Yeah, I think it's loving me as well. I think, I think I'm getting a lot of, A lot of love from. From all departments, really. My wife's back in love with me, my kids back in love with me. It's, it's. Yeah, it's. It's been a great process, actually. Yeah.

Yeah. Credit to you and the exceptional work that you've done, mate. You know, it's. Yeah. Like the, the value that you're adding back into the tribe. I remember where was it was. It actually might have been a book. You know, giving is the path to receiving and it absolutely is. Whether it's a Christmas present or not and, you know, the gifts you're giving out in Lee 2.0 and how you carry yourself as a husband, as A man as a father, as a businessman, as a valued member of society, as value, member, community and hpf. How can you not win? You know? But may, I'd love for you to dive in and just share a little bit about yourself, your story, your background. You got some pretty wild stories. So I'll block out the next six hours and let's get.

Let's get into it. Yeah. Six hours. Is that it? Yeah. Fine.

Part one. Part one.

We've got.

Sean. We've got to make room for Hutto's hazing. That's a new segment we're bringing where Hutto's going to come in and, and just rip on the. On the society's shortcomings. This is what an evolution. We're entering eighth season of hpf. But yeah, man, we'd love to. Love to hear your journey.

Also, Huddo's hazing is actually. Is actually about ripping on society. I thought it was actually ripping on Hutto. So I'll. I'll just count all the things that I've written down then. Fine. I had to. I had to look at all.

We'll save a special roast for him for another time. We won't tell him.

Yeah, yeah. His. His slow times up Huddo's Hill. No, no, I not give him too much. He'll. He'll give it right back now. He's, he's actually. Him and Luke and, and all those guys, you know, squad leaders. We get together on, on the, on the Tuesdays. They're all. They're all absolute legends. We're. Yeah, we're really getting some. Lot of value out of getting together on that. Yeah. A little bit about myself. I, I grew up rural New Zealand. I grew up in a. A log home. My dad was a log house builder. He literally built our house out of $300 worth of power poles that he bought off the side of the road. Put it together. I grew up with trees and timber and, you know, big timber mills and building things, tree houses and, you know, a whole lot homeschooled. Didn't really fit in at school. A lot of fighting. Lot of. A lot of sort of, you know, angry behavior. I never really. I never really figured out why I was not fitting in, but I didn't. Um. Yeah, I got to about. About 11 or 12 and really just started to want to explore the outside world. I come. Come from a. Quite a. Quite a religious family. I. I don't know. I like. I don't like that word, religious, but I came from a family that was quite indoctrinated or they, they wanted to really have a tight Christian experience for us kids which was, you know, fantastic way to grow up. Very clean lifestyle, very focused on the well being of, of the children and gave us heaps and heaps of, you know, experiences with learning speech and drama, all sorts of stage experiences, camps, all that. They really poured themselves into us and, and, and continue to do so. They're, you know, amazing parents. I really grew up with a great, a great childhood, but for some reason, I'm not sure why, but for some reason I really wanted to go and have a look at what was offered on the other side of the fence and see, see where, see where I could go and, you know, stuff it up. And so yeah, about, about 11, I mentally probably left home about 11 and about 14, 15 I decided to finish up with school and by this time it got to the end of the, that, that school year, I think I was 16. And circus came to town basically. Yeah, I just, I was, I was, you know, away for a bit of a stray. I was doing my own thing and, and the circus came to town. I, I met up with guys there, my parents knew the advertisers for it and bada bing, bada boom, got a job. Off we went and, and yeah, and so we're life on the road, you know, and, and, and the circus life. Young guy in the circus got incredibly fit very, very quickly. And so it was just that, that lifestyle, you know, drug, sex, rock and roll parties, you know, riding naked on motorbikes through golf courses, that kind of thing, you know, just standard, standard, average stuff. When you're 17 and had a helmet

on, so, you know, you did the right thing.

Very safe.

When you say naked, was there no headwear as well?

Well, it was a helmet. I, I don't know. Yeah, we're carrying it. Who knows, I don't know, resting it somewhere. Anyway, it's not, it's not relevant. Look, we, we had a lot of fun, let's just put it that way. There's, I mean there's so many stories that came out of that particular time through till I was about 19 and you know, to be honest, I could tell you them but you wouldn't believe me anyway. It just wouldn't, it wouldn't translate into, into the real world. It was just like the surreal, surreal time got through that. I was probably a good sort of 90kgs of just pure muscle. I was doing Chinese polact. I was working pretty hard, doing a bit of catching on the flying Trapeze and yeah, yeah, ripped, ripped as 12. Body fat and yeah, powerful, powerful young guy, 19. I met the wrong girl and. And we actually went down the road of getting together, left the circus, got with her. She had a young son, started to raise him. After about a year and a half or so we went down the road of getting engaged together. And then two years in, I decided to come a different way home from work. Ironically, I started working as a timber machinist, going back to my roots, going back to what I knew and I went a different way home from work. And there she was walking down the road with another guy, hand in hand. She'd lived this whole other life together with this fella and my heart just dropped. That was it. My sort of world was over. I'd really committed to her and in the footsteps of my father and my mum, I thought that our relationship was super strong. Couldn't see the forest for the trees. I couldn't see what kind of a person she was and I couldn't see what everyone else could see. I was just blind. And so I really, I was really crushed by that. I really felt like she'd done the one thing that I'd sort of asked her not to do and not, not really her fault. It was her upbringing and everything else that really came to, you know, that was her playbook. And so I looked around to try and find solace somewhere and I, I would tell everybody the same story. Oh, I can't believe she's done this. I can't believe this. You know, this is so hurtful and I'm hurting. And then I. I met up with a mate of mine and he happened to cook crystal meth. And so off we went and cooking and smoking and, you know, there's some light distributation around the place and bits and pieces. And I slowly got further and further into that world whereby I was staying up longer and longer periods of time and taking more and more, smoking more and more and getting. So after about a year I got down to about 67 kilos and I got a photo somewhere. I showed my wife the photo and she said that's, that's no way. That's you shaved head, you know, scraggly beard and. And I looked like a emaciated person, just somebody without any, any flesh on their face and just, just looked like Skulltor out of he man, the master of the universe, you know, I looked totally different and I had an epiphany, a vision and I don't particularly. Well now I'M actually getting more into sort of the visions and frequency and that kind of thing. But at the time I didn't particularly buy into it. But I had a pretty strong vision of a hill in front of me, a path leading over the hill, and on the other side there was a crow waiting for me. And I knew that in one month, if I carried on doing what I was doing, I would meet my death. That would be it. So I stopped and I went home, went to Mum and Dad and I said, look, this is what I've been doing. I want to stop, I want to get out of it. And so I did. I quit. And I haven't touched anything since. And I wouldn't wish that. Six months on anyone. That was awful. Yeah, just months of sleeping one hour a night, waking up, being exhausted all day and then not being able to sleep again. And just your sleeping patterns, totally disruptive. Your chemistry and your body's totally, totally stuffed came out of that. I was still. Well, I say I haven't touched anything. I haven't touched any meth since then. I, I continued to take acid and, you know, smoke weed and lots of alcohol and lots of, lots of degenerative behavior. Bunch of different jobs while doing this, you know, in some pretty unusual positions. I was a stonemason and I was a daycare teacher. I was the most stone daycare teacher you've ever met in your life. So I did that for a number of months and, and, and then the circus came back to town and I saw it as my opportunity to get out of the rut that I was in. And circus came back to town, came over to Australia. I toured with them. I managed that show for about a year. I was 10, boss there for a year, came over to Australia, 2010. So I was 29 at the time by then, so a fair bit of time had passed. Six, seven years, you know. Oh, 10 years, actually. Met my wife and so 2012, we, we got married and, you know, pretty, pretty special lady. I, I remember the first time we met. We met at a Anulin Circus party. And the reason I want to touch on this is because I was very much the prize without any of the. Which is an HPF principle. I was very much the prize without any of the panache that we have in hpf. So I understood the concept very well about being the prize. And so I, I walked into the circus party and there was a bunch of people all standing around this really tall, slender, blonde, beautiful lady right in the middle, and everybody was facing her and I Thought, mate, I've got no shot with this lady. There's no chance in hell. So I thought, you know, the only way I've got to get her is that she comes after me. And so she came over to talk to me and she said, oh, hi, my name's Elena. And I said, yeah, I know. And I walked off and that was it. She, she, she said, well, he was rude. He's the first person who's ever been rude to me. I'm not allowed to let that go. So she came chasing after me. So, and she still insists that I was just rude and there was no, no strategy behind it. And I still insist that I'm still got the wedding band on. So I guess you know who's right here, you know. Yeah, yeah. So we, we went into a pretty massive journey. I mean there was, there was some pretty big exploration of frequency. I'm very fascinated about frequency. We traveled to Egypt, we've gone through pyramids and we've gone through a lot of ancient sites around, around the world. Because I'm really interest, interested in how ancient technology and frequency coincide with each other. I believe there's a big connection that we're not tapping into. And so we've done a fair bit of really interesting adventures based around that and it gives you a good holiday destination as well, often. And yeah. 2014, 2014, second of the fourth 2014, we had our first child and Cairo was his name after our love of Egypt. And he came out and unfortunately passed away a couple of minutes later. I don't, I don't particularly talk about it too much just because it's pretty, it's pretty, I don't know, it's pretty raw. It's a pretty raw thing. And yeah, she, she understandably, understandably, she, she, you know, mental state went downhill pretty pretty bloody quickly. And there was a lot of discussion, hard discussion inside of that time period. And before that, you know, we were very excited. It was perfect pregnancy. Everything was going really well. And after, it was very, very dramatic, a very dramatic loss of a baby. So after that the finances became something that I could focus on and something that she didn't want to focus on. She didn't want to focus on anything. And fair enough too. So it became a, you know, men are very work orientated. So you give us a job, we want to do the job. And for me, hey, there's a job I got to take care of. I can jump in and jump in on the finances. And I started learning about interest and then compounding Interest and then the share market and then investing in property. And then I become. I sort of understood that I was this little baby and in a paddling pool and there was this whole ocean of financial knowledge out there and so I just carried on learning and learning about it and that's where my, my fascination with that came about. In 2015, we had our next child, Zariah, and she's an absolute rocket ship. Yeah, absolute rocket ship. She is so special. She's. By the time she was one, she had 300 plus words. She could tell you where everything was. She's just a real smart kid. Amazing. Yeah. Love my life. She's wonderful. And then a year or so later we had triplets and we weren't trying, we weren't actually doing anything, I guess we. Guess you could call it. We were just having fun. And so that was 6th of 6th of June, 2017, we had triplets come out and I remember being in there with the sonographer and finding out we were going to have triplets and of course we just burst out into desperate laughter, I think you'd call it. Holy crap, what are we in for? I don't particularly wish the next three months on anyone, but it certainly gives you an idea of capacity multiples, gives you an idea of how far you can push yourself and how far you can, you know, how far you can actually go without sleep, without, you know, anything else. So it gives you a really good understanding. Yeah. So we were just. Then we're just sort of existing, working, raising kids, you know, just dealing with everything and just slowly getting the ball rolling on, on, on growing a life. But not. No direction, nothing at all. I really had no, no goals. I couldn't have told you really much. And now I've learned how much time I really wasted inside of that become very apparent now, you know, becoming very time conscious now. So then the next, the next sort of blow happened. In 2021, my dad. My dad lost his life in a very sudden accident. Truck came around the corner and collected his car and just took him out. And, you know, my mum rung me screaming, you know, it's very traumatic and sort of went down this road of, you know, one knock, one knock with the loss of the baby, one knock with this, you know, the hardship of having triples multiples and then the knock of losing my dad. And I just got into this, I guess this hole and I couldn't see any light at the end of the tunnel, you know, pretty, pretty tough. I just felt like it was just one, one Knock too many. And so then I started drinking. And I mean, I always, always was a drinker, but I started drinking pretty heavily every. Every night. You know, it wasn't a night that went past that I didn't have, you know, you know, six or seven cans and then into the. Into the whiskey and. And then from there we went down the. Down the road of, you know, going into. Going into, you know, gambling, pub, that kind of thing, and really started to, yeah, get. Get into that. Get into that area. And yeah, it became very, very difficult to sort of focus, to sort of concentrate. I really wasn't spending any time with my family, my kids. I was really just sort of going down the road of just, I don't know, being a waste. Waste of space, you know, waste of time, waste of a human, really waste of a dad. I did little things here and there, but we got to. Got to the stage of going on a cruise. A family cruise. Family. Family cruise where I just went off and gambled the whole time and drank and. And, yeah, it just really wasn't. Wasn't any kind of focus on my kids or anything like that. I spent. I spent, you know, the. The prerequisite amount of time with the children and. And then I was straight back on the tables and I came out of that and my wife sat me down and said, well, this is it. We're gonna have to call it quits. You. You know, we're gonna have to start talking about divorce. You're obviously not committed to our relationship and you're obviously not part of what we're doing now. And, you know, I can't see any way out for us. I wanna. I wanna divorce. And it was like a. Like a light. Light bulb went on. Not. Not in a bad way, but I suppose it just shone a light on all of the. All of the terrible that I was doing, all of the waste of. Waste of space that I was doing. And of course, algorithms, the way they work, as soon as you. As soon as you talk about anything, your phone's listening to you. And. And the ad for. With. With your face popped up and off you went, and you told me exactly. Exactly what I was going through. And I thought, Jesus, you know, this guy might be onto something. So I gave you a call and you called back. Well, I think. I think I actually got Mike first, and then we booked in a call together. And I still remember. It's funny because my memory, although this might be a limiting belief, my memory is not so great, but I still remember sitting in this same Truck and looking at myself on the zoom meeting and seeing my bright red face, my lobster red face from my high blood pressure and I had blood pressure up. What was it, 120 over 190 or something? Something ridiculous like it was just, you know, through the roof. I was just, and I was on two different types of medication at, at, you know, 40, 43 years old to try and bring my blood pressure down because of my, my lifestyle. And I think it took you around about seven minutes to call me on my, and look through my performance and see the man underneath and go, well, hang on, you just contradicted yourself. And I went, holy crap. He just, he just saw right through my performance. That's faster than anyone's been able to see through my, through my mask ever. And yeah. And then thought, this guy's onto something. And so went, all right, let's go. And really, really kind of went all in. I've really enjoyed it actually, to be honest. I've really enjoyed the exercise. I think I did four or five 21 day challenges back to back and then lost a bunch of weight. I went down from 98 kilos down to 83 kilos at first and I think I'm settled about 85, 84, but you know, pretty, pretty ripped, good muscle and now got a good balance in life and you know, and my state of being actually changed as well. It changed from a selfish state of being to actually one of caring and a purpose of caring. And I've made that. My edict when I'm dealing with the men of HPF is that I actually are genuinely trying to practice the care that comes with the responsibility of being a squad leader and that kind of thing. But what an environment. You can't beat it. I was telling my nephew about it today, the world is a bucket of crabs. Everyone's just trying to pull that top crab down into the bucket. Whereas HPF is just like this whirlwind of everyone trying to pick each other up. As soon as you get involved in that, there's no. If you, if you actually get involved in it and you commit and you go all in, just like, you know, just like one of our, one of our standards, you go all in. There is no way that you can fail. And the system is so well put together. And congratulations on that by the way. That's really, it's a really smart system.

Hey, sir. Thank you, mate. It's a credit to the men like you who've been involved at an all in capacity that's allowed us to engineer the system. Because no one person anywhere in the world can sit down and say they created something from nothing. Certainly not me, that's for sure. So maybe I'm not that clever, but I just listened to men like you and adjusted accordingly. I look at our community firstly. I mean, obviously the Jesus and pretty solid stuff to dive into there, man. Thank you for the shares and the transparency, but I see the HPF members as ladder building crabs. They've gotten out of the bucket, they jump back in and go, let's build this fucking man some ladders. Build him some stacks. He's a ladder. Sorry, you had me laughing because it's a true. I love that analogy with the crabs, but it's like I'm just visualizing these claws, like, getting little bits of string and delicately tying off corners and building this.

It's funny because I actually imagine this bucket being this. This. We're building an even better bucket, you know, like this palatial bucket with all these n. Nice areas.

Oh, shit, that's. Wow. What a share. What a share. I didn't want to shock you in our call, but. So I thought I'd give you an additional six minutes of space and talk time before I called you on the 7th.

But.

Yeah, it only took a minute, mate. No, look, what I saw was obviously, like, every man in his field, you develop. Look, I think everything's intuitive, everything's intuition. To be fair, Lee, like, you got to think about either having a consultation like we did, or talking through things or strategy. Like, the forefront of the brain is so limited at that 40Mbps. There's gotta be some level of, like, even if it's a tone. And my hardest part, I mean, I don't have those. Those calls on the front anymore. We've got valuable members who take those calls with and for us, and they love the honor of helping other men step through the gate. But yeah, with. With someone like yourself, it's.

It's.

And all. A lot of the calls that I had in the past was really hard because I could see, like, obviously the masks that we wear.

But.

But behind that there was a very genuine. And obviously, you know, have a look at you, but there's a very genuine man, you know, and then, like, that's always been the hardest part for me to be like, oh, man, you're telling me your life story. Me. You have so much potential, mate. You could be an absolute world beater. And. And. But who. Am I, right? Someone. You just meant to say that. Oh, yeah. Cool. You're just saying that until you ask for some money. And that's the hardest part. It's like fucking. And maybe that's a gift and a curse that I feel blessed through my mother, where I've always seen the best in people, but I'm smart enough now, because I'm a massive panda at heart, to embrace the protection of the Viking and the chief, to ensure the best possible path for those who actually want it, because that's.

Fuck.

You've been through some hard things, man. And my very first thing that come to mind for me is, why? Why did you do all that sort of stuff? And then it was like, okay, like, just. Just going through the process. But then it's also like, man, this dude's pretty fucking resilient. But then also with the story and what you've been through, I'm like, I used to always think, Lee, it's probably one of my older podcasts, persistence equals just lots of resilience. But I don't think that's true. I think persistence in life, because you're an extremely persistent man. I think persistence in life is a combination of resilience and the shortcomings and hardships coupled with a desire to change your location. Like I said before, can't see where you've come from if you don't actually move. Like, because if you really are persistent, well, that means you're going somewhere. You want to go somewhere. So pretty hard stuff, man. Obviously, for all fathers, one of the hardest things in the world is the challenge with the children we love and fuck, man, that would have been hard, but across the board, you've lived a very colorful and tough life. So I'm curious, with all of those hardships, you could have done what the masses do and just bow out. What drives you, man? Like what? Cause you're very resilient, but that doesn't mean you have to do anything. A lot of people in the world are resilient. Otherwise, respectfully, we'd see that horrific percentage be even more of people no longer wanting to be here and doing something about it, which is really sad. So everyone. So everyone who's still alive is resilient, but you've now taken that as fuel, and you're an extremely fucking driven man. Your drive's phenomenal. Very ambitious. Where do you think that's come from? Like, what is driving you, and what does that drive gotten you? Yeah, hpf. Blessed for the journey, and you're an amazing member whatnot. But your results, not mine. They're your results. What drives You. And where has that taken you now? 12 months down the track with HBF and your journey.

Yeah, yeah, sure. So it's either persistence or it's just a genuine attention deficiency and I'm just completely hopeless at focusing and I'm on to the next thing. No, it's not, it's probably persistence. Look, the fact is that I decided probably about four or five years ago and I didn't have the tools to do this, but I decided about four or five years ago that my timeline, why would I stick to my timeline being just my life? Why not make my timeline longer? So if I make my timeline 150 years, that seems genuinely achievable. Let's let me, I want to affect, not my, not just me and have a great life and have a fulfilling life. Something that I've, you know, and yes, I have to build wealth in order to go and go and explore the world and you've got to have money to be able to get on a plane, so on and so forth. So I've got to do that. But how do I create this timeline of 150 years where I can not only provide for my children, but for their children? And it's also about teaching them how to do the same thing. And so in order to teach them, I've got to know that I've got to gain the knowledge. And all due respect to my parents, they were terrible with money. They provided for us, we had an amazing upbringing, we always had food on the table, incredible home. But genuinely, if they wanted to get a new washing machine, they would go and increase the overdraft at the bank. They would go and talk to the bank, manage and say, listen, our mortgage needs to be a bit bigger so we can go and buy a washing machine. And that was a sum total of my financial acumen. So I really had no, no clue at all. So what drives me is this, this, I guess to gain the knowledge, to be able to affect those generations and pass that knowledge on. And so it, it, it all trickles on to everything else. The fact is that if I don't know how to do it, then I can't teach it. And today actually I had a discussion with Zariah, my 9 year old, about critical thinking. Why is it that I'm reacting this way? She doesn't want to go and sell these things in the circus. She doesn't want to walk around and sell these things in the circus. And why is it that I'm feeling that way? Why do I not want to go and sell it. And what are my markers for success? And if the marker for success is that you're actually selling the object, but everybody else's marker for success is that you're consistent in showing up, then which marker for success is right? Let's have a think about it. Let me ask you the question. And so I'm teaching her about critical thinking. And so if I can start teaching her now about critical thinking by the time she's 18, one would hope that she has a perspective where she can zoom out and practice this, you know, long term thinking, Long term critical thinking on, on her own, on her own. Standard stuff that I, you know, I really didn't have a clue on. So I'm learning at the same time as teaching it. But that's really what drives me is, is affecting that those next generations. That's what I want to, I want to do. I want to be able to, you know, teach that and teach other men as well. Teach, teach other men in hpf. I want to pass the knowledge on and, you know, I think it's the only way that I can impact the world in such a positive way. That's all.

Yeah, it's powerful stuff, man. They're the exact two key things that I wrote down. You know, it's, it's. We talk about this, you know, learning things and true powers learned to reflect a combination of all three, you know, not just the acquisition of information. That's not, that's not powerful at all. It's applying it and then applying it again in the right direction. So you continually making those incremental improvements and remembering. But I love it. So simply put, when it comes to the bigger purpose and your service to life itself, if you don't learn it, you can't teach it. That's really cool. That's something I actually don't think I've said or heard before, but makes complete sense. I did say this to the team the other day when I had a meeting. The greatest leaders are the greatest students. So fucking true, man. So it probably goes hand in hand. But that's something that I'm learning, relearning, remembering, learning at a different level, just levels in life. But it's like, yeah, the greatest leaders are actually the greatest students. Am I actually listening? And I'm listening to every word. I'm watching. You're right about frequencies. Like everything has a vibrational plane. We're. What am I sensing here? You know, like just, just the reason why people struggle or they're socially awkward or don't have social awareness is. You're just so fucking busy in your head, just stop and fucking listen and watch and observe. I mean, you're a human being, mate. We've got that in us. You know the survival mechanics to get a read on the room, so to speak. Like, watch your child play and you'll see exactly where they're at. You will watch two people interact. You can see through it, you know, watch. Watch two women interact. And you. You know the term passive aggressive, that didn't come from nowhere, gentlemen. Fuck. It's funny to watch, I tell you, but that's energy. And the other one, Absolutely. The trickle effect to everything else. Powerful man. 12, 12 months has passed. What have you experienced? What have you seen? What have you done? What are the outcomes? What are the ripple. What's the trickle? And the ripple effect that you've already seen in your own life, your own results. You've gotten your families, your wife, your children, the community. Walk us through it, man. Cause we're men, right? Yeah. Love it. Love, love the feeling me some facts like that's, that's, that's powerful stuff. Obviously, for those who, you know, aren't accustomed to the inside of HPF as well.

It's.

It's good to see what you're, what you're saying.

Oh, look, I've, I've, I've had probably four great, what I would call revelations that have actually shifted my core personality so my core intrinsic value. I, I am. I am Lee Derfliger. This is the way that I am. There's four big moments that I've really gone, whoa. That's just changed everything for me. You know, like that's, you know, that's totally affected the way I even look at the situation now. And, and, and one of those was definitely frequency. Definitely. And in fact, it's even one step further, you go and you read the room. And then you can actually control and change the frequency as well. And it changes from, you know, for example, today I went through an incident where somebody was angry at me and I didn't accept the frequency that he was giving off. And I spun it around and just went, oh, so you're angry about that? Okay, that's fine. And changed the whole dynamic. And his frequency, actually, because now I'm quite strong in what I do. His frequency changed and matched mine. And he went, oh, right, okay, cool. We can work this out together. Awesome. We came to a great outcome. And it was just that ability to now shift that vibration that's happening to me, that frequency that's happening to me, and I'm able to not take it personally and turn it around and actually shape it. So that's definitely one of them. And I guess probably the biggest one was that my ego was controlling me. That's the biggest one, really. I was acting a specific way so I would actually preempt somebody else's emotional response and I would try to shape that so I would do some work in order for them to have this emotional response of them being happy and then give me a pat on the head. And that would then. So I was actually doing the initial thing to get a pat on the head, which is actually a selfish act. It's not doing the act for the right reason and being a good person. And so. But everything. And then I realized I was doing everything for that reason. And then I was realizing. I realized that actually because I wasn't getting that reaction. I was just constantly yo yoing between my ego had such control over me that I was just constantly yo yoing between this negative outcome that I was getting all the time. And I was getting so upset that I would get this negative outcome and I would do these major projects building, you know, huge ornate things, and I put special effort into it. And then in the end, all I wanted was a thank you and I wouldn't get one and the world would collapse around me because I wasn't a good person doing it for the right reasons. And I flipped that around to understanding that my ego no longer had control. And like the book, Ryan Halliday's book, Ego is the Enemy, I turned off that switch. And it wasn't so much that I actually felt a loss of my ego. It's actually that I felt such a freedom. I felt such a freedom from not being controlled anymore. And I was able to not do things and not be affected by them. People couldn't guilt trip me into anything. Cause I no longer had this background noise all the time telling me, oh, you've got to do this because your wife says you have to do this. She won't be happy and you won't get your pat on the head. Well, that changed. And now I do things because I actually love her and I want to do the right thing by her or I love my kids, I want to do the right thing by them. I want to be a good person, do the right thing. I'm motivated by that. I'm not motivated by getting a pat on the head. And it's quite funny because ironically, as soon as I adopted the style, the accolades started Rolling in people, really, you know, how many times. You know, how many times I got told, good job after? And I said, oh, no, I don't care about that anymore. You know, like, don't tell me, good job. I don't need it. You know, like, it was quite. Yeah, it was quite an amusing thing. And in fact, I started. Started practicing that in my workplace, and my respect level really went far up. And it was something that I always wanted from my workmates or I work with my wife's family, and they're very stoic people in their system, and I always wanted some respect from them, and I never got it until I stopped listening to my ego and trying to pander to that. And that was a great. A great moment. I've had several like that. You know, the keystone effect, where you. You affect one thing and the rest of everything in that situation gets affected. That whole bridge collapses as soon as you pull that one keystone out. The fact that when I'm talking to the members of hpf, it's actually not the story, it's the man that's important. That's a. It's a golden one that I. I really sort of realized that I actually care about the men advancing themselves, because when dads. When everyone wins. And so the fact is, is that when you. You focus on that man and you grow him as an individual, you know, everything else around him is affected by it, and it's not his story. Everyone has a story, and sometimes the stories are horrible, and sometimes they're very light and. But really, it's. It's actually the individual. And when they come to us, and I say us because I feel part of the ethos now, when they come to us, they have a story and they're focused on it. And within three months, they're no longer focused on the story. They're focused on themselves and growing. And that progression and that growth is actually what we should be focused on as men. And we lose sight of that, become husbands and fathers, and, you know, then stuff doesn't start working out for us. And we're ultimately frustrated and grumpy by the fact that our wife isn't doting on us and we're not laying by the fire with our kids running around the room. And, you know, we have this image in our head, and it doesn't work out that way. And, I don't know, I got pretty pissed off about it. Went through a midlife crisis, and then with my life collapsing around me as well, all that added together to be this, you know, Giant mess of a guy, mess of a mess of a man. And I'm really, I'm, you know, very grateful for the fact that I, you know, was found by HBF and have now, you know, yes, I've put work in, but the, the greater community, the greater ethos has, has certainly been so supportive and, and have pushed me to these greater heights. And it's only just begun. I feel like I've only just started. Like, I've. Okay, now I've got my baseline, you know, like, now I'm gonna see what I can actually do, you know, like, it's, it's. Yeah, Yeah. I think I'm, I think I'll probably sign up for life, to be honest. It's not, it's not something that, yeah, you sort of discard. You don't find something like this every day.

Oh, it's extremely rare, man. Like, some of the rooms we've held with the events that we've run all over the country, it's like. Do you think there's other rooms like this going on in Australia in the world? Absolutely not. You know, and the tribe is the most powerful thing. And I've said that no one man, including myself, but it's the individual man's mental approach, attitude and contribution that makes it, it's all the arrows together that makes the, the whole bind or the whole bunch unbreakable, you know, but, you know, so it's, it's, it's self mastery and legacy building takes years, Lee, so men don't have to stay in HPR forever. There's always going to be new fathers who have new kids. 5 million dads in Australia. Like, it's not like we'll run out of work, but it's going well. What do we want to build? Like, we want to build something that's extremely special and a brotherhood that is. Is not only sticky, but actually sets the standard for what's possible because that, that shining light supersedes me and the coaches combined very easily to be the true message through the example. Just like we want to be to our, to our kids. Not how well Al can talk words.

It's.

Who are the shining examples. So. And you're. You're one of those. It's so funny, isn't it? Like, what leads sharing, guys? It's a universal truth. Like it's, it's funny, but it doesn't, you know, but not funny. Haha. When I look at the exact same thing every single time, the man gets to a point where invest in himself or he's valuable enough to be willing to walk away. The woman comes running back in because she picks up on that energy, that sense, that vibration, that, that confidence. Like you can't give what you don't have. So, you know, we talk about love and other things, but you can't also receive what you don't already have inside of yourself, otherwise it becomes a false illusion. So if you don't respect yourself, how the fuck do you think anyone else is going to respect you? That's really hard. You have the most loving people with good intentions, but through their actions and dismissing your weak, passive energy as a man who is not leading, of course you'll not be respected at the level you could have. You know, that's interesting thing. Like a couple of these things here, like with the woman coming back, like, it's. He's a legend of like one of our members. And I remember him saying, you know, we're talking through and he's right there, man. Like, he's, you know, currently separated, but if the wife doesn't hear back from him in half a day, she's worried. I'm like, oh, mate, me. Like, you just, you know, don't. This isn't a pickup club course. It's don't, don't play games, but just stay true, hold the course. And she'll see the mistakes of her ways. And there's an opportunity should you choose it as well. Takes two hands to clap, two hands to come together to keep moving forward. And the response, and I hope this man hears this because again, don't, don't name drop him, but one of our members, because you're so fucking close, mate. His response was, thank you, Al. I really hope she sees me as the prize. And I responded back, when you fucking see yourself as the prize, everyone else will. There's a little asterisk. Fix up that sentence there, mate. It's not. I hope she said, no, no, no. When you see yourself as the fucking prize, everyone else will. And guess what? I actually see you. I see you as the prize. So if my words and vision holds any weighting, take that and run with it. Because you can have it. All men can have it. What do you think, though, man? Like, what do you see in the modern world where are men struggling? Is it because they don't have a brotherhood? They don't have other people around them? Like, this is such a unique tribe. But yeah, easy for Al to say. He started it and found it and he has to say it. No, no, no, I purposefully exclude myself from pretty much every other fucking environment that is not holding a standard. Because this is so special and valuable to me and what it gives me back in return, you know, as a man, as a husband, as a father and men who've experienced this and then other environments will. Oh yeah, man, chalk and cheese. So I'm not saying it just because, but that could be it. But a lot of men are drifting without a vision, without direction or clarity on how to be success. Like, what do you think you've been around the world, man. What's this common problem men are facing? Like, where do you think fathers and men are dropping the ball and, or struggling. Not fault, but just struggling and not running towards a life they can live.

Yeah, I think it's probably, I think it's probably come from the advent of not only attention deficiency because you know, when I was clowning back when I was sort of 17, 18, I did a gag called the Lemon gag. Now that gag, the duration of it was eight minutes and I had everybody's attention for eight minutes. That gag, by the time I finished it and I finished it or probably four or five years ago, I stopped, I stopped running that gag. It was two and a half minutes long because I couldn't keep the audience focused. And our attention deficiency with, with all of really the Internet, the advent of the Internet. And you look at, you look at the development of, of the Internet and how fast it is, the information that we're all receiving, you know, now, now people can go out and look at YouTube and have circus acts on real and basically just bombard themselves with circus acts and they come to the show and they go, oh, this is not that special. I've seen 150 of these. But that's also the thing that happens with men as well, is that they see all these so called entrepreneurs, Instagram lifestyle, this, this, you know, amazing, amazing, you know, guys who are doing this, amazing bodies and you know, there's sort of these, these Jack guys who are doing these incredible experiences or living the life the way that they always dream of. But the reality is that goals and long term vision is still the fundamentals of being a man and conducting yourself a certain way. Because if you don't have those goals, a long term vision, it's exactly what you said. You start drifting around and then all you've got is this information all the time of these unrealistic expectations of you that you're supposed to be driving around in a Bugatti and acting, acting like Andrew Tate and you know, like you're supposed to be doing all that stuff. And that's the, that's the absolute, you know,.001% of the world. They, they actually enact that because they've had, you know, lucky stuff or stuff's fallen their way. But the majority of men, majority of all of us, we only become special when we realize how special we are. And we only become special when we start working towards that. And the only way to do that is to actually have an overarching goal. Because if you don't have that, you're just a gray part of the masses and you're just traveling along. You've got no direction, no drive. That's kind of the way I see it. I think there's a funny picture of, of the sizes of phones versus when porn became freely available online. And the size of the phone was always very, very small. And then porn became freely available online and the size of the phone suddenly went to this size, you know, like massive, massive phone. Because everyone started watching porn all the time and it, it's this constant influx of what's readily available. And you know, I just think that the more time we spend on a screen or the more time we spend filling our minds with, with stuff that's, you know, not, not actually, it doesn't have our best interest at heart. I mean, nobody, nobody posting how they're driving around in the latest McLaren or whatever and, and they're, you know, throwing money at girls in bikinis. Nobody's actually got your best interest at heart. They're just, you know, showing off. They're not actually doing anything valuable. And you know, the fact is, is that if I, if I spend some time on Instagram filming something or putting it out there, I, I try to make it either a journey or something that's valuable for somebody to watch. And I also really appreciate a lot of, a lot of the guys like Dan Henderson for example. His stuff on Instagram is just awesome to watch. He's got a lot of value. There's. But it's the advent of the non driven just bullshit that hits us all the time. And there's so much of it. And you think you should be living your life that way and really you should be going back to fundamentals and going back to your true self, your true core. And when you hit your true self and you hit your true core, then you start living your life that way. And that's what we went over on the Monday charge up with the masks. Actually not being that performer because that performer is incidentally it's actually affected by what we see. We think we're supposed to perform that way. When we take that mask away and we stop performing the way that we, you know, the way that the world tells us we should be, and we start performing to our true core values, well, then we become very special and we become very valuable and we become very driven. And it's not for everybody else. It's for us as for our families. It's for our legacy. And the reality is, is that you become that kind of. That driven person. There's no way you can't succeed. And that's what. That's what has been unlocked in myself in the past year. You know, that. That idea of being, you know, being 18 again. I guess I call it being 18 again, although I don't. I don't want to be 18 again, but I call it being 18 again because I. I feel like I had this truer sense of the world and I had this love for life, and I haven't felt that in a long time. And I've started feeling that again, this enjoyment. And, yeah, my wife started treating me that way and that I've actually got an enjoyment for life. And my kids have started enjoying my company and I've noticed a real change in them. It started to become very special and very sort of, you know, they stop what they're doing and, oh, dad's home. Yeah, cool, let's go hang out together, you know, that kind of thing. Big, dramatic changes. So you can definitely see the value. Sorry I wandered a bit off topic

there, but, yeah, very valuable insights, you know. And you and your wife have an amazing relationship. You and your kids have a great relationship. You've got good time with them now, good balance. Things are going well.

Yeah, I think. I think it's just. It's staircases and plateaus, you know, but the overall trajectory is up because nobody in HPF ever says that their relationship with their wife is going well all the time. Because if they do, they wouldn't be a man of their word because we all have our roller coasters. And I think. I think somebody put out there in the squad leader, you know, that his. In the squad leader chat that his wife would react this particular way. And. And one of the other squad leaders, it may even be me, said, oh, your wife reacts the same way. My wife does. And then the next one said, yeah, oh, that's. My wife reacts the same way. They must all speak the same language, you know, and it's. It's not surprising that we're all with very strong women who have these really strong ways of behaving. But would I have it any other way? No way. I said that to my wife. You know, if you were a weak woman, I would have dominated you in about a week, two weeks, I would have dominated you and you would have become a slave, and I wouldn't want a relationship like that. You know, I love her being so strong and independent and, you know, this, this wonderful woman. And to be honest, you know, when I get her affection and when I get her, her treating me as the prize, it actually means something because I've earned it. I've, you know, I've become that, that great character who she actually sees as valuable and fantastic. You know, I definitely see myself as valuable and I won't be mistreated now. But the fact is that she sees me now in a different light. Definitely. And the kids see me as a completely different. I've asked them before, flat out, you know, has things changed? Oh, well, you do a lot less yelling, dad. You know, you do get a lot less grumpy. We can actually, you know, we're not, we're not worried anymore. You know, come home and they're like, oh, can we go and do something together? You know, that, that sort of a question wouldn't have existed a year and a half ago. That wouldn't have existed at all. It would have just been, oh, dad's, dad's home. Stay out of his way until he's had a few drinks, then stay out of his way even more. Now he's off to the pub. Good, we can, we can go on with our lives without him around. What a waste. Makes me sad to think I've wasted that much time with them. So lapping it up now. Yeah, much better.

Oh, yeah. And now so much more to give. Yeah, it's a crazy world out there, fellas. I've said this in other podcasts, which was inspired by a member when he said, when you give your kids technology, they've got access to the world, sure, but the world has access to them. But the same what disqualifies any one of you just because you're an adult from that being a risk as well. Nothing. In fact, even worse because more often than not, you're the target audience, which then allows the tolerance to and buy in for your children to just follow suit quite easily and cave. Yeah. Be it watching telly every night and you're passively giving buy in to something that your children will naturally adopt because they're watching what you do. So that's to live life as a stiff. But be mindful of that because the same risks apply for you. Like think about this as human beings, man, how many environments should we actually be investing ourselves in? Because it's a wild west. You jump online on the Internet, mate. Fucking millions, probably tens of millions. I don't know how many, what is it? The URLs, how many landing pages? Websites links are unbelievable. Now I've got a lot of books behind me. Great. But I can take my time. I can dive in and out of that. I understand the context of that environment. Not fucking pop ups and ads and other things. And next thing you know you're on Instagram bender looking through how you can one up your mate with funny. And it's funny, you know. Or I'm seeing chickens with like commando arms and machine guns attached to them with these little wires, which is pretty funny. My mom and I send us each other some little chickens and see, you know, I, I like it, enjoy diving in stuff. But I, I do not have tick tock for that reason at all. Because I'm like, oh man, there is genuinely some entertaining and dopamine and drug hitting, you know, the chemical releases inside of your brains are those happy hormones, be it oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine, endorphins, these, these certain things that will just ride the out of you as a program in your brain and steer you off course to what you should focus on in a life you can live. What you focus on is what unfolds in your life. It's that simple. So yeah, it's interesting stuff you shared on that man and completely agree, like very, very dangerous. You know, the only reality that exists right now is me and Lee, Lee and I, and we're here having an amazing session together and nothing else matters outside of these walls. Is my castle in the driveway probably. But if you look at the double slit theory, the law of probability says it's a probability wave and it'll collapse into particles when there's an observer present to make that reality. And that's a real, I love that stuff with quantum mechanics, man. But that's a real philosophical approach too. Like I really, really love some of the stuff I dug into there with Robert Lanza, even Bruce Lipton, he's like the epigenetic godfather. But Robert lands a man. Biocentrism. That's an incredible book.

Holy.

But mate, this is, this is the, the epidemic that we face with men in this world just getting led like lambs to the slaughter without seeing a clear path on what's possible. And then the ramifications for their actions until it's too late. And when I say it's too late, it's when your children are 13, 15 and 17, they don't want to know about you. Your missus hates you and she just can't wait till they leave the house. And then you split up your assets and there you go, mate, you're 50, chewed up, spat out. Good luck for the second half. Wow. That's not a 28 year old man listening to this going off. Better turn my act around before I'm 29. No, no, man, you're in too deep. It's too late. What I love about what you shared though, with the mask. So, like I, fellas, I'm not a perfect person by any stretch of the imagination. Of the imagination. And being the CEO, like, I make more mistakes than anyone and I take ownership over that. And it's worth it. Otherwise we wouldn't be here today. But being my raw, unfiltered truth is just such a fucking blessing. And if you can accept that and come along for the ride where we journey together, fuck me, mate. It's a journey you'll never forget. But also, I think it's important that we all have our own, you know, have our own place in this world where you just need to be you. Like. Like be you. That's one of the spines. So we've got our tenets and one of the spines of HPF is be you and show you. Right? Nothing to fucking hide. Just be transparent. Does that mean I need to bring up all truths? Well, Lee, would you like the 60,000 thoughts I've had today? Be hard for me to even bring them up. So it's not. But it's not about omission or concealing either. It's about being yourself. But also the outlines of that is be yourself, but then improve on who that self can be. Using leadership. Using love and leadership as your true north and compass. Right? That's very important. Like improve. So that's a rate of. That's. That's a rate of change. State of change. Love and leadership, true north and compass. Otherwise, yeah, you could be a fuckwit and just be more of it. Well, that's. That's not really the point. It's be yourself the best parts. Because we've all got. We've all got a messy list, but try and hold on to the valuable things. Don't always just slap yourself on the wrists and castrate Yourself for the. For the flaws. We all have them. Be you, be yourself. But also try and improve that self because you can. It's a choice. It's possible. Keep doing it. It's probable. But use a good true north. Love and leadership is that true north encompass for you. It's powerful stuff, man. It's actually heaps easier too. Instead of just trying to put up a front, I could do podcasts and not swear at all. I enjoy swearing and the way that I place it in with emphasis and purpose, not because it's a twitch, but being yourself, being your real authentic self. What you see is what you get, but what you keep getting, keeps getting better. Oh yeah, just on that, like, I'm a very. You talk about big addies and all that sort of stuff. I'm an extremely simple personally, like, for everyone else listening to this as well. Like, for me, my life is built around how much value can I give? Like, that's it, man. Cause my upside's huge. That's very. That's very selfish of me. It's a good kind though, right? Be the kind of selfish. Be the type of selfish that has unbelievable upside for other people. You know, call it selfish, call it self centered. I use those because they're probably a couple of good trigger words that helps you think about things differently when it comes to being 100 to give 100. But for me, man, it's very simple. It's like I'm going to die one day. I want to completely exhaust this life as a human being. How much can I give? And if you give it the cost of yourself, your time span and quality of giving will be shorter. So it's this delicate balancing act. How can I, you know, be 100 to give 100? So how can I just give as much as my. As much as my capacity will allow, but then keep topping that up, you know, be 100 to give, not hold. Be 100 to give that hundred. And that's all my life is like, like I said, being a pretty big panda at heart for. For humanity and namely fathers. It's like, how much can I give those I love and care about in this life? If that was all you had as a true north, coupled with the principles of how to give the most because of you being the prize, investing yourself, you won't miss, man. Hard to miss. What are your thoughts, though? Like, I guess, you know, wisdom and advice. Like, you've seen a lot in the tribe, now you're an integral part of it. What are some of the best things You've seen some of these other men's or. Hutto messaged me earlier and said, see if Lee can outdo me. I had two amazing one liners. He's got to come up with three. But I'm just kidding. But I can see the Titans are getting into it. But, but now look what I guess words of wisdom, advice, some key insights for people out there. Things you picked up from members. Yeah, we'd love some more shares, man, and perspectives and insights from you.

Yeah, sure. I think it's inevitable though, you know, the inevitability of serving. The fact is that we all go through life and we're always going to be serving. You know, it doesn't matter what capacity. We're either fighting against serving or we are serving. So you either go with the flow or you resist against it because it is inevitable. Everybody is going to be serving at some point or another and you're either pushing back against it and you're in a position of conflict or you decide that you're going to go with it and you decide you're going to be the best possible serving person that you can. And the reality is once you make that decision, you start to serve, then the return is 10x. You know, the return is 100x. It's just massive. The more that you, like you said, the more that you give, the more you receive. It's just how it is. And so you don't end up giving to receive, but you end up becoming this person who becomes this ultimate giver. Because if you don't, well, you're trying to resist the inevitable and the fact is you're not going to win. It's inevitable, isn't it? So that's, you know, there you go. That's my one liner. That's, that's my one liner for Sean. But yeah, no, he's, he's, he's such a great stoic philosopher, Sean. I really enjoy talking to him and I really enjoy the fact that he's, he's such a real, a real member. A lot of the, A lot of the guys are. So I guess because we're unguarded as well. There's no kind of social status that we have to worry about. And so again with the bucket of crabs. But yeah, the fact is that our comments or our discussions are immediately so deep because we aren't worried about what the other person thinks of us because we already know that we're all learning. We all get together and we're all learning together. So whatever we bring up is whatever we bring up to be able to talk about it and get deeper and actually understand it and then say, well, what's the path forward? Let's look at it without kind of any kind of prejudice and figure it out together and that greater collective of the tribe figuring out these problems that affect us. Why does my wife not love me? Why is she, you know, love me but not in love with me? All that sort of stuff. Why is this happening? Why do my kids, you know, not stop what they're doing and pay attention to me? What are all these, what are all these major problems that we have? And, and to be honest, the hive mind of the tribe getting behind each of these questions is pretty spectacular. And especially when you got a lot of very, you know, very smart, very intelligent people, because these guys are driven. Anyway, they're here, so they're already progressive thinking. So if they weren't, then they wouldn't be here. If they would just be happy with the status quo. And I know for one that I'm not happy with the status quo. So I'm going to be trying to push myself and to be around all these guys. Even just the rise to wins every morning, that sort of stuff. It's so motivational. You get up and you're like, I'm, you know, I'm three behind the one who woke up earlier than me, damn it, I gotta wake up earlier, you know, get up at two. So I just, just get that one rise to win that's before everybody else, you know, like, and it's not about the competition, it's actually about the inspiration. I enjoy it so much. I, I look at the feed and I think, far out. Look at all these guys all just getting up and getting after it and the posts about working out and, you know, bettering yourself and I don't know, there's just the whole thing, the whole thing is a giant collective snowball of inspiration. It's so cool. It's great to be a part of a couple of one liners in there anyways that you can use.

There's at least one good one, but no, there's probably 10. But you know what? But look, the. We should run an ad to that one day. I'll tell you what, just get a highlight of. Hey, because I know we're all. You have your squads, you know, you've got your good titans and the, and the fire breeds and whatnot. But like, it'd be epic to just show hundreds of rise to wins, right, of these men just every morning, hundreds and Hundreds of rise to wins. I'm getting up ready to crush the day. Like, that's such a. That's such a powerful thing, man. Just to. Obviously I can see all the groups, but like, just to see it, it's like, mate, incredible. But, you know, I think just on a serious note, though, Lee, look, we. I think it's perfectly reasonable, you know, with. With your situation where. Sorry, how old are you again, mate?

44.

44. Like, it's. Well, with. You're well within your rights to. To be comfortable in knowing that, like, where you're at in life right now, given that Hutto is twice your age, you should only have one. One line and he should have two. You know what I mean? Like, I think that's. I'm sorry, gold. We'll shave if you're 93, but we'll round it down to 88. But now, look, heaps. Heaps of. He's. I get to go over to South Australia, get a visit one day and just. You just get me in a headlock and choke me out.

It's just going to walk around, show you that perfect strike immediately.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah. I was actually quite. Yes. I never thought the perfect strike could exist, but when I saw Al's face when he landed after all the. All the ribbings he's given, it just came to me,

mate. The.

This is something, though, very important. Just. There's one more thing I'd love to cover with your expert insight and I understand, like working in the industry and putting on acts and facades and you spoke of masks. You did a phenomenal session with the. With the boys in our Monday charge up the other night.

What?

How. This is something. I'd just love to get some insights. How would. So there's a man out there listening. How do you remove the mask? How would you say? So if you have a path and maybe do it. Maybe just got some advice or guidance. But how does a man out there who is struggling and lost, like, how do you actually start to just fucking be yourself and start to just fall back in love? Or at least just have that respect of the core again? Because you got it, man. You might not like a lot of parts of your life, but you got to own the core. Because without that, you'll never light that fire again. You'll never get that spark. You'll never be able to act on the ambition that deep down exists inside of you. Men who listen to this. You're all ambitious. You can't not be. Why the fuck would You. You wouldn't like this. So you got to hold onto that core. But, yeah, Lee, how do you start to just bring down the walls, remove the masks, remove the facades, face the truth, whether it's fucking ugly or not, and start to then rebuild and build who you want to be? I think it's important. A lot of men out there, they're lost. How do we remove the masks? Be your authentic self. Improve that self, and you might have tough environments. That's the hardest part. I think a lot of men out there would have environments that just don't give a about them, even if it's their family. But how. How does a man start that? And please, boys, this isn't a call to action. Hey, start by joining hpf. This is your journey. There's never a hidden agenda. I want you to genuinely take the advice of this man who's done exceptionally well in breaking down the barriers and becoming his authentic self. Because, you know, you've got other businesses now you've started, Lee, we're doing some work together, which is great. Like, I can't. You know, with Cozy. I can't wait to see 2026, Lee Dorfliger unleashed. But, yeah, man, I guess. How do they start just removing the fucking mud and building the sculpture of what they were born to be?

Yeah, well, I'm in the same boat. I can't wait to see what I'm. What I'm capable of either. To be honest with you. I'm pretty excited about where I'm going, and I haven't felt that feeling for a very long time. So I'm. Yeah, I'm in the same boat. Look, I mean, not to. Not to give you the entire rundown of the charge up, because we, you know, I think we'll be coming closer to the six hours if we did that. And. And what. What a chart. I mean, to be honest with you, it stemmed from a very simple Japanese proverb about the three masks that we wear. We wear one for the world. We wear a mask for our loved ones. And the third one we never show, we wear it for our true self. That's our true core. That's our intrinsic core. And the thing is, as we. As we go through the world, our. Our masks that we show the world that process of. Of identifying where we. And that's what I took the guys through. I took the step one was identifying where we wear the most. The heaviest mask that we wear. Where is that? Where. Where is that in our life? Are we. So far, the furthest point from point A, which is our true self, to point B, which is further as possible away, where are we acting the most? And then the, the reality is, is that once you isolate that and you see that that point and you think to yourself, why, why are you acting that way? Is it because of years of indoctrination that you have to act a certain way? Is it because you're so far removed from your true core? Is it because somebody else has insisted that you should act this certain way in this environment? And quite often at work or anything like this, you act a certain way and every so often the mask slips and your true self comes out with anger or frustration or some sort of emotional diametric that comes out that completely is oppositional to how your mask is. And people are very surprised. Oh geez. You know, he's, he's normally very quiet and suddenly he was loud. Or he's normally very loud and suddenly he was quiet, which is in my case, you know, he stopped talking for a minute. Far out. How crazy. You know, like mad. But the thing is, is that the masks, the way that I see them is that I show my truer and truer self the closer I get back to home. And the closer I get back to home, the more I show my true self. But what if I could in fact isolate those masks and then start to show my true self throughout all of my life and become far more consistent? And it would actually be based in truth, because I wouldn't be putting on a performance that was so far removed from my true core character, which is far easier to play. And HPF is a mirror. It shows you. Those moments in your life where you're so far removed from your core self. And then it gives you the freedom of actually controlling that and changing it back to how your true value is, how your true self is. And you start acting as you. The longer we go through life, the less we act like ourselves. I, I don't act the way that I did when I was 10 or 12, which was actually probably closer to my true core, my true, my true fun loving self. You know, and I wrote it down the other day, you were a fun loving guy. Just because I'm generally just pretty serious. But why did I decide to be serious? Well, that was actually a mask I put on because I wanted to protect myself. I wanted to protect myself from all the hurtful comments, all of the, you know, I'd make an off colored joke or I'd make, I'd do something that was wrong and somebody would say something hurtful to me. And so in the end, I put on the serious mask of being a serious person all the time. That way nobody ever got close to me. But that's not truthful. I have to be a man of my word. I've got to start being truthful. I've got to get back to my true self. I don't need to change that mask entirely, but I do need to refine him to actually echo my true self. It's obviously, obviously resonated with a lot of people because I've just been, yeah, I've had a lot of messages and guys calling me one on one and asking me more about this. And I've had, yeah, I've, I've had a few responses that have just. Obviously the guys have just had light bulbs like it's been. But for me to have the kind of effect that affects a man who's been doing the same thing for 45 years and has ultimately been completely frustrated with it. And from some words that I spoke, there's this amazing light bulb moment that not only affects him, but affects his family and affects his family's family moving forward. And his generations are all affected by this light bulb moment. Just from some words that I spoke that for me is just so ultimately, you know, that's the ultimate demonstration of my care. I really, really enjoy that process because that process has happened to me. I've realized that I, I can actually show my true self wherever I go. I don't have to be this person behind a mask. I can actually be me and I can be this fun loving guy and I can make an off color joke and hey, if you don't laugh, well, you obviously don't get it. You know, you know, sort of, you know, I, I can, I don't have to wear the mask. I don't, I don't change the performance because obviously situations, they call for certain type of. I'm not going to go and, you know, in clown costume to a funeral or anything like that. But you know, some certain situations require a certain amount of decorum. But at the same time I can be my true authentic self and behave that way. And becoming that true person is really, it's interesting because it's actually, you're actually becoming step one. And isn't that funny how you go back, you undo all of the stuff that you've learned and you become step one and then you move forward as step one. And that's freedom. That's true freedom. Because you're not, you're not trapped by every, everybody else's thought process or the situation around you. And that's, and that's, you know, the basics of the, the process. I took them through a much more detailed process for some journaling and, and yeah, it was, it was, it was pretty cool. I had some pretty amazing, amazing guys step up and share as well, which was really, really, you know, augmented the, the process as well. So it was pretty cool. Yeah.

That's incredible, man. What a powerful share. You know, for a lot of this men, it becomes any perspective as well. Like, I know inherently the animal in us is a lazy creature, it just wants to survive, but the spirit in us is screaming for more. And so it's really flipping the script on. What might seem uncomfortable is knowing that the discomfort today is, is the victory for tomorrow. You know, it's absolutely the easier path. So you might think, no, no, no, it's easy just to be fucking sloppy and don't do this and don't, no, no, it's way harder. You just haven't had to pay your debt yet. Right? So if you can. Because what Lee's talking about is not easy. Like it's hard. You've got to face your fears. You've got to face one of the number one things even beyond above and beyond the fear of death, which is the fear of rejection. Because that's a real lived experience, you know, fear of rejection through society. So other creatures that we want and crave naturally social acceptance from so we can survive in our tribes and so on and so forth. So it's hard, but it's way easier than what's harder if you don't to try and just flip that perspective as well, to know that another holiday book, the obstacle is the way. Like it's, it's so true, man. Like it's, it's. I love, I love. He's got great books, man. The ego one is very good. Ego's the enemy. Courage is calling the bit of courage, man. Bit of courage. Because when you do that, I promise you'll win. Like it's, it's why I'm not reckless in seeking out adversity. But I welcome any challenge because that's, that means, ah, it's almost like. It's like I'm a sentinel now and that's my sensor, that's my compass. That's fantastic. That's exactly what I need to do then. Let's go. So I love that, man. That's, it's, it's quite, quite powerful stuff

and waking up every day and making that conscious decision to do that, you know, that's also tough because you're so sitting. Your way of not doing that. All right, wake up, put my mask on, off I go. I'm going to be somebody else.

Wow.

Now you don't have to. Now you can actually just wake up and just be Lee. Well, not you, but you be Alex, I'll be Lee. But, you know, the fact is, is that you can wake up and be yourself. And if you can unlock that, that's. That's awesome. You know, that's. That's a great freedom.

Difficult balance, too. People can be hesitant because, like, hang on. Like I said, I'm here to serve, I'm here to give, but that doesn't mean I'm here to please. You know, we want to please people. We want them to feel good. We want to create fond memories. People won't always remember what you did there, but they'll remember how you make them feel. So I get that. So it comes with. Does come with a bit of a, like, you know, one of our above the line principles in HPF is servant Persona. That sounds so weak. No, no, it's leadership. Like, I'm not serving Lee 2.1 here, I'm serving. If I'm having a conversation and dialing things in with Lee, I'm sitting next to Lee and we're talking about 2.4, 2.7, 3.1. And if I need to be fucking savage at the cost of feelings of Lee 2.1 so that he can see Lee 2.7. 2.7 is the fucking goal. Will we agree? Yes, we do. Cool. Thank you. You've given me permission. Fucking 2.7 is the goal. Let's go. I'm here to serve you towards that. So it's a really. And mate, that's what I love too. Like, I'm massive, like I said, massive pain at heart. I can be extremely loving and then one second, the next second be completely fucking savage. But it's all contextual. It's not a. It's not a. An illness or a bipolar type nature or Persona. It's always seeking in an obsession of mine, of what is the best energy to create and drive the best outcome for all, knowing full well. Just like you and I, we all have the ego. Let's make sure that motherfucker isn't driving the bus, because then things could get hairy. So it's a delicate thing, but I think if you be yourself and you build that just like your intuition, like all things, it's a muscle that consistently allows you to not do, but actually just be. And then doing is to create a better being. And then you just, you know, you hear all the fame, you know, you're a human being. No human doing. Like, I get all that, like, dad jokes aside. But. But it's worth it. That's. That's my biggest takeaway from everything you shared, Lee. Like, it is worth it. It hasn't come without conflict. I've had conflict my entire life. But. But it's worth it because I look back now, if I bowed down to any one of those situations, be it CrossFit, sport, other businesses, teenage years, high school, primary school, fit kid, fat kid, like all of that, man, if I gave in, there's no way we would be here today. Without a doubt. Even one of those. And it's a. It's a. Yeah, we probably all have that chip on the shoulder. Maybe. I don't know. But I remember in preschool as a little kid, fucking Russell with his old unibrow. At four years of age, he used to kick me off bikes and other things and. Yeah, pushed me over and just. Just used to, man. I was his target. And you're listening to this Russell, You Russell. Yeah, yeah. Do we have any members? Just before I say, big, you, Russell. Do we have any members called Russell? I gotta say, hey, thank you, Russell. Thank you, Russell, mate. What a legend. Every year there's a guy in high school that. That used to give it to me, but I gave it back, but I wasn't. Mate, I'm glad he gave it to me. And his birthday's a few days before mine. And every year I flick him a message. I'm like, hey, Daryl, mate, happy birthday, man. I just want to say. He's probably sick of me messaging him. Okay, man, I just want to say thank you again, because I was that fat who used to play the victim. And thank you for kicking my ass and pulling me. And he's like. And Darryl's like, nah, man. Like, I was. I was way out of line. I shouldn't have. I said, nah, man, it was perfect. And so you have those.

So.

No, no, Russell's all good, man. I don't know where he is, but in the world. But actually, I did see him and I was like, fringe, first grade, rugby league. And we're talking about the good old days. Not that I was. I didn't put it on him or anything and put it over him, but I laughed because you look at that. But. But, man, you gotta look at these situations and know that there's always a choice, whether it's Russell, whether it was Daryl. He's a fucking good dude, man. Like, he's. But, mate, he was the big dog back in the day and. And, you know, and I was out of alignment with what typically is the schoolyard system, which is a jungle of status and popularity.

So.

So you've got to look at that. Know there's always. There's always a choice. Choose a hard road, otherwise you'll be faced with the impossible road. And even if it's the hardest road, it's still better. You've still got a shot versus down the track when you find yourself on the impossible road. Because once you get on that road, you got no fucking shot. And there was a. Just as we wrap up, it's been awesome, man, having this session with you. Hope you guys got a lot of value out of it. But there's a post it note which doesn't apply to me, but it's a great reinforcement of where I've come from. It's a good memory. And the post it note reads, even when you don't have anything, you can still have drive. And I fucking love that. I don't know if I made it up. I don't know if I read it somewhere else, but I've written it down. It's very sloppy handwriting. Again, I don't know if a member said it. I'm not gonna claim credit. Those words existed before I was born, but put together. I fucking love that sentence, man. Even when you don't have anything, you can still have drive, you know? And it's like, fuck, yeah. And I've got everything that I could ever have asked for and more. We did ivf. I didn't think I was gonna have children. Now we've got a fourth in June, December, and wow. You know, and so I'm extremely blessed. And even if I have nothing, just having the drive and that faith and it still gives me everything because you're still breathing, you still got a shot. But I love that, man. So let's shape that for you men. Even if you men feel like you don't have anything going for you, you've still got that one thing inside you, which is that fire. She can just spark. Bit of flint, bit of rock. Let's fucking go and light up that animal. But yes. Final thoughts, mate. Words of wisdom.

To be honest, the thing that's probably changed the most for me is that I welcome the challenge. I welcome the challenge in all aspects of my life. I used to shy away from it, you know, you've always got a decision. You can always have fight or flight. It's always that you either fight or you treat, but you never cower. The fact is, is that now I actually welcome the challenge. I welcome the challenge that each situation brings me. Whether it's somebody getting angry at me and I have to harness my own rage and, and actually acclimate and make my own frequency a certain way. I'd love now tackling everything as a challenge. It seems like it's more and more apparent. So that's something that HBF has given me, is that I, I, you know, I welcome the challenge of, of my life now. And I'm, I'm just, I'm just enjoying it. I'm enjoying my life again. You know, I probably was just a person who was gray beforehand and now I got some, some color and now I'm actually enjoying my time, you know, and that's, it's, you know, that's a pretty big gift, you know, to, to have that, to have that drive again and. Yeah, felt like I had nothing. I still had drive. Now I've got drive again. You know what I mean? Like, I'm. I'm actually passionate about things again and I'm really enjoying it. That's. That's, yeah, that's my final words, man. That's. That's really it. Just welcoming that challenge again.

Inspirational, man. Inspirational. Puts your tally of one liners at 53, Hutto, in case you weren't counting. What a podcast. What a. Yes, that's. It's been an honor having you on, mate. I. Lee, this is a really good run through. Have you got time, mate? Do you want me to hit record? And we'll run through a session and we'll do it now properly?

Yeah, let's go. I gotta see. I felt, I felt that my delivery was a little lackluster, so. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Turn it on. Why not?

We are recording. I thank fuck for that. Yeah. Nah. Well, I hope you boys enjoyed this. What a time to be alive. You know, it's the world's shot the shit, so what an opportunity, man, for us to step up and stand up more than ever before. Because if you and I don't do it, who the fuck will? And I must say this, and with respect, if you're a young man in your 20s watching this, or if you're an older bull in your 60s, there's a bigger scope. It's not necessarily based on age, but there is a bracket. But having the old guard values Principles and way of fucking being with some new age adaptability and being malleable and adjustments to change and pivoting and adapting it. That's the fucking future, man. That's why men between 30 and 55 matter so fucking much. Because we are only one generation away from fucking losing everything, anything and everything that was actually ever valuable to the core foundation. You talk about going back to step one, the core foundation of what created the whole reason we can fucking do what we do today in society as human beings and don't ever let go of that. Did the old guard have heaps of. Heaps of mistakes, flaws and holes? Of course they fucking did. We all do. But men, you listening to this? You are the fucking glue. Whether you like it or not, this is absolutely the glue. And this is your calling. Because the old bulls, with all due respect, in their late 60s, 70s and 80s, they can't fucking do this. They're too far gone, too far past. They need you to step up and the young men, they need us to fucking lead the way. I'm not sure why I shared that, but I just felt compelled to. But thank you, Lee. It's been awesome, man. Hope you boys enjoyed this.

Yeah, fantastic. Thank you so much for having me on. Been, Been awesome, actually. It's been good. Yeah. I must say I can't stress enough how much these interactions mean for me. I think that meeting up with. Yeah, meeting up with yourself is obviously awesome and you know, but with the other guys as well, meeting up with them, physical catch ups, you know, just, just the, the, the, the knowledge, the growth, it's, you know, I'm, I'm really looking forward to, you know, charging hard and, and accepting the challenge and, and, you know, striving forward and, you know, for all the guys out there that are waiting, wasting time waiting, pull the trigger, jump in, let's go. Because honestly, if you're the right fit for, for hpf, then there's no, there's no better place to move forward, no better place to excel, accept the challenge, become somebody who loves life again. Yeah, that's, that's just a genuine, a genuine thought from me. I, well, you know, I think, I think that people should really. Men and then that age group, they really should consider this as, as a life changer, as something that really drives them forward. Yeah, that's, yeah, that's it now.

Thanks, Lee. You're a great man. Onwards and upwards, sir. Thank you, boys. Take care. Well, that wraps up another episode and just as we wind this down, I want you to Just reflect and think back through some of the gold nuggets, some of the revelations, some of the sore points, some of the things that might have hit home with you. And then just look at ways that you can apply a different set of actions to change your position, change your circumstances, change your feelings, and change the facts. These episodes are done with your best interest at heart, and there's always something we can get from that. Maybe it's not the first time, maybe it's the second time. We've had members listen to episodes four or five times and then a final finally clicks. But either way, I hope you got a lot of value out of this. And also, if this is something that you really want to solidify inside of your life, repetition is the key. You listen to it, write down your revelations, think about them, read them, speak them, believe in the changes that you will carve out in the action plan of those revelations to create change in your life and then share that. And when you teach, you learn the second time, right? So teaching and showing this to others you love and care about about is the greatest way that you can remember and make sure you consistently learn and relearn what is it's true and what is it is important to you in your heart. Take care, have an amazing day night weekday weekend and I'll see you for another one soon. Cheers.