No Balls: England march on & Crossy's magic-mania

This BBC podcast is supported by ads outside the uk. Hello, it's Ray Winstone. I'm here to tell you about my podcast on BBC Radio 4, History's Toughest Heroes. I've got stories about the pioneers, the rebels, the outcasts who define tough.

And that was the first time that anybody ever ran a car up that fast with no tires on. It almost feels like your eyeballs are going to come out of your head.

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First ball castled. Now I'm celebrating for Crossy. That one was for Crossy. That was a beautiful delivery. The wobble ball again from Kate Cross. And that is such an important wicket. Kate Cross in for the hattrick ball. Oh, so w. Hello, and welcome back to Nobles the Cricket Podcast with me, Alex Hartley. And in the middle of the night, Kate Cross.

I mean, Alex. Feels like the middle of the night. It's not. It's five to eight, but it really does.

It's dark outside and I'm gonna break the early news. You have to get up this early because we've got a podcast guest. Said guest is no longer a guest on the podcast.

This podcast is one of those things that if we've got a guest on it, I would get up at 3am to do. But is it just me and you? 7:30 in the morning doesn't feel like our wheelhouse for the best time to be recording this.

No, your message to me this morning when you found out Healy had cancelled. She is coming on, by the way, for anybody that's tuning in just to listen to her. But next time we do a podcast. Really, really made me laugh because I was like, I'm so sorry. It's literally so early.

Yeah, it's not that early. People get up to go to normal life and start work at this time. So it's not that, you know, it's just I'm not in that flow of set my alarm at 7:15 at the minute. So I'm just gonna say sorry now because it already doesn't feel like it's gonna be my best feel less nasally already.

All of our podcast listeners know that we don't do mornings.

Don't do mornings. Unless we've just got in from the night. They. That'd be the one.

Sorry.

Sorry. Quit your right.

Oh, my God.

Do you know what. Do you know what makes this all even a little bit funnier? I was just in the middle of a dream when my alarm went off. That we were doing the podcast with Midge, and I called her Smudge, thinking that was her nickname, and it obviously isn't. She's Midge. And she was really, really made up in my dream, like, beautiful face of makeup. And I was like, why have you got so much makeup on for the podcast? And she panned around the room, and in the room was Phoebe Litchfield, Talia McGraw, Ash Gardner, and George Railwiss. Don't know how George Railworth got in on this, but they were recording their own podcast that they do. Don't think they do a podcast in real life. Pretty sure they don't. And we were gonna just put them both out at the same time. And as much as we love our shambles of a podcast, theirs was, like, a thousand times more of a shambles. They start. They stopped recording halfway through and just started playing a game of hide and seek.

And.

And we were like, oh, should we leave? Should we leave now? Because this. It's actually. This isn't a good episode. And then I woke up to the message that had been canceled, and I was like, of course. Of course.

Yeah, of course. You subconsciously knew that.

Yeah.

Alyssa Healey had meetings today. But, hey, she'll be back. It's fine. We'll get it done. We'll tie her down. And.

And the interviewer, the questions that went out on Instagram were very good. So we will definitely get them to her. Even if she don't come on, we'll get them to her, because I feel like she'll answer them for us.

Yes. Bar getting up really early, Crossy, how are you? And how have you been?

Yeah, I'm okay. I've had a really lovely week away. I went on the PCA Summit and then. Oh, we spoke about this last week, didn't we? Went on the PCA Summit and then played some golf. So I went over there with Phoebe G. And we joked about a test match. We played a test match of golf. We played five days in a row. And I'm not really conditioned to playing golf at the minute, so it was a real toll on the body. But we had a great time. It was good fun. Played my four ball with Stephen Finn, BBC's finest, and Mark Butcher, Sky Sports, cricket's finest. So it was really good fun. We had a great week. A lot of laughs, a lot of terrible golf. A lot of very good golf by Butch, because he's very good at golf.

Yeah, I know you've had a good week because this is the first time I've spoken to you for A week?

Yeah. I did say I was going off the grid, didn't I? Just want to go and enjoy some golf, switch my phone off, have a bit of fun. But now.

So I literally. I was like. I took that so literally. I was like, okay. She said she's going off grid, so I'm just not gonna message. And if she needs me, she'll message. Or she wants to talk, she'll message. And I was like, I'm just gonna let her enjoy a week away.

You really did lost. You really did. And then when I did message to say, how are you doing? You're like, I've been really poorly. And I was like, oh, God. Right, okay, I'm gonna come back on the grid to check that you've not dehydrated permanently. Ribbled up into a raisin.

You sent me a picture of you and Phoebe G. And I was like, oh, I love you both. Like, nice to see you. I hope you're having a great time. How are you? I was like, yeah, unwell.

Really not good, were you? Not good at all. Are you better now?

I am, I am. I ate my first. I had my first day of eating yesterday properly.

That's a full week after.

Yeah, yeah. When I say it got to the stage crossy where I got on the. In the car to go to the one of the games and I was like, do you think I've got a parasite?

Oh. Oh, we got there, did we? Was it that bad?

And then I saw one of my mates from the ICC yesterday. He's like, you've lost weight. I was like, it's not good.

Oh, bless you. Oh, it's not good because Dan had it first, didn't he? Why did, why did you go to games if you've had something that was getting passed around?

So we got said bug and then had two days off. So Dan went down first and then I went down and then Dan was fine. Like, he. His was like a 20 hour thing. He said he stopped being sick after like four hours. And then it was just the other side for another 12, 24 hours. I ended up missing a day of work, which I've never done in my life. I've never been ill. I missed work and then went and did the England game. And when I got there, I was like, I'm not sure I should be here. Got home and I projectile vomited everywhere. Oh, my God. Yeah, but it was one of those. And you know what it's like when you're traveling India. You don't want to be Sick in a public toilet because you don't know what else you're going to pick up.

Well, that was where I fear I picked up. The parasite was in one of the cricket stadium toilets. So, yeah, good choices.

So I just sat there all day, hunched over, going, I'm gonna be sick. Gonna be sick. My mum was on holiday, bless her. Come to Sri Lanka, and she's like, do you need some water again?

Do you know what? Those are the days where you do just wish you had your mum. And the fact that your mum was there probably was an absolute blessing in disguise.

But the last sick that I did, it felt like my small intestine was coming out. So she brought some water into the bathroom and. And she was then nearly sick because she was like, smells like something died.

Oh, bless you. Oh.

But other than that, Crossy, I'm good.

Good. There's just one part of this trip that I have to tell you about, Al, because I didn't quite explain it to you as much as I should have done at the time, but. So we were away for Graham Gooch's. It's now become an annual golf trip. Last year was the first time it had happened. So then me and Phoebe got invited back. And the girl who organizes it is a girl called Bea, and she's like the. I don't even know what a job title is, but, like, does all the events for the pca. She's a belter and they know. And Gucci knows the vice. I need to get this right. The vice president of the Magic Circle. So, you know the real secretive thing that all the magicians are part of, that once you're in it, you know, you can't let your secrets out. You've got to be. Yeah, you. Like, you. I think you're probably like blood, you know, it's like a blood oath where they don't let anything out. Do you know what I'm talking about? I feel like you've never heard of the Magic Circle.

So it's magicians.

It's the thing that, like, Dynamo will be a part of. Derren Brown will be a part of it. It's like what you sign up to. To.

Right.

Not give anything away, but also being part of it is, like, really prestigious.

Okay.

Okay. So this guy, he's called Michael Fitch. He's vice president. He's just been made vice president of the Magic Circle. So he's. He's a big deal. He, like, does all of Gordon Ramsay's show. Like, he was at Gordon Tilly Ramsey's 18th. And he was telling me the story. He was like, so I'm doing this magic trick for the Beckhams and David's fate. And he's like dropping all these names because this, his life is just not real, basically.

And you're like, and I'm Kate Cross.

Yeah. And I was like, I love magic. I'm obsessed with magic. It's like the one thing. And I was saying this to him. I feel like if you're at a show and it's like music or sport, you might not always necessarily be into it. But I feel like everyone buys into magic.

But the word. Right, so I'm with you. Like totally with you. But the word magic also gives me the ick.

Yeah. Because it does feel like you've gone to a 12 year old's birthday party. But this was. I know what you're saying, Alice, was the proper stuff. This was like he was reading people's minds. He was giving a dice to Mark Butcher, saying, put the dice face down, don't show anyone what number is. Oh, that's a four. And Butch is like, it's a four. And he went around the whole room and did it with everyone, just threw this dice to them. And then he guessed be's dad's pin number for his phone. Well, didn't guess it, obviously, but he was just like, magic. It was proper. You know, the proper stuff that really does make you think, like, what the hell are you doing? Anyway? So I had met him the day before and I was telling him, I was like, I've got magic books at home. I really wanted to be a magician when I was a kid. And he was like, right, I'm gonna use you for the spoon bending. So I was like, right, okay. Bending a spoon is not hard. Like, I can bend a spoon anyway.

All you do is rub it and it bends.

He gets me up in front of the whole group. He's like, you're the person I'm gonna use. Owen Morgan has sent me a video because he was there, he was filming my face when this happened. So he gets this spoon. I'm gonna use a nail file is a. As a visual. So he gets a spoon and he's got it on his hand like this. And as it's on his hand like this, it starts bending like. Like that. And I'm like, what the hell? How is that happening? Thinking it must be a fake spoon. Then he gives me this. Sorry, before all of this, he gave me the spoon to sign. So my signature's on this spoon. So it's bending. It's bending. It's bending. It. Gets it to the point where. I'm gonna have to break my nail file for this. Gets it to the point where the spoon is like this.

Yeah, okay.

And I'm like, there's something that. Like, it doesn't feel right. He then straightens it back up. So I'm like, yeah, there you go. Like, how easy was it to bend that spoon? He then gets me up, puts it in my hand like this. So I'm holding the spoon as tight as I can, and the only way I can do. And he's like, twisting it around like this underneath. And the only way I can describe it is a bit like. You know those tongs that you used when you were at school in music and used to bang it on the table and it would vibrate?

Yeah.

That's how it felt in my hand. So that tiny vibration in my hand. He eventually pulls the spoon out and the whole thing is twisted around itself.

Where is your spoon?

Oh, I left it, actually. Finny's got it. So I can. I can show you this spoon eventually, but Finny's got it at the minute. I'll get him to send a photo, but it's, like, twisted around.

Did you send me a video? Was it.

I did, yeah. No, I sent you a video. Let me get the photo up. For the purposes. Yeah, let me just get the video up. I won't. I won't play the video because it was quite early in the morning. Wasn't.

Was quite early in the morning. You got out of bed for the spoon.

I did. That is how the spoon is twisted. You're like, whoa, look at that. What the hell, man? And he was like, okay. So it's all his whole thing. He was joking. So that's. He signed it on the. On this actual spoon bit. And I've signed the bottom bit. Look. Look at that. It's twisted around itself. And he did that in my hand.

For anybody listening, they're gonna be like, crossy. This is the most excited. We've heard you about anything for months. And also. Also, I didn't know you loved magic.

Oh, I love magic. I. If you can turn a tennis ball into a potato, I. You've got my full attention. Right.

I'll get working on some magic.

Also. Also let you in on a little something for next time we see Finny. Okay. So Finny got. Obviously, it was part of the distraction, but there's this bag, and there's a lemon in it. And so he Was like, right, I just need a volunteer to hold on to this. Lemons. And every time I shout, who's got the lemon? You've got to stand up and shout, I've got the lemon, baby. And that was Finny's job. And when I say Finney took it to a whole new level. Like, there's four shouts of who's got the lemon? And it was Finny every time. And he stood up, obviously six foot six. He stands up and he screams at the top of his voice, I've got the lemon, baby. And it then became this thing that whenever anyone saw him on the trip, they were like, who's got the lemon? So next time you see him, I want you to ask him, who's got the lemon?

Okay. I might just send him a lemon.

Emoji to see what he says.

Yeah, because he'll actually be up now, so by the time he replies, we'll be halfway through.

Just text him now. Text him now saying, who's got the lemon?

I've actually just typed in lemon rather than Finn, who's got the lemon? See what he says.

See what he says.

Wow. So what, a week off?

Yeah. So anyway, I just promised the magician that I would mention this because my mind was blown. Blown.

So you keep calling him the magician. He's part of the magic circle. We don't know their names.

Michael Fitch. I did say his name.

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

I actually was calling him. I thought his name was Michael Fish, so I was calling him Michael Fish for a few days. But that's not his name. It's Michael Fitch.

Okay. Michael.

Really?

And he's genuine magician.

Proper, proper stuff. Like, I was like, tell me what's going on in my mind. Should I play cricket next year? He's like, I can't answer those big questions.

They're like card readers. They're different.

Yeah, yeah. Fortune tellers.

Hello, it's Ray Winstone. I'm here to tell you about my podcast on BBC Radio 4, History's Toughest Heroes. I got stories about the pioneers, the rebels, the outcasts who define tough.

And that was the first time that anybody ever ran a car up that fast with no tires on. It almost feels like your eyeballs are going to come out of your head.

Tough enough for you? Subscribe to History's Toughest Heroes wherever you get your podcast.

Well, while you were having your week off, Crossy, I'm in the middle of a World cup and we've got three still going on. Yeah, yeah, We've got three teams now. That have qualified Australia unbeaten, England unbeaten, and South Africa. And the funny thing is, even the people at the bottom of the table, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Bangladesh, in some weird and wonderful way, everyone can still qualify.

That's good though, isn't it? That's the kind of World cup that you want. Because definitely what you want to have towards the back end. I know we're probably not too. We're not close enough to the back end for that to be happening just yet, but that's. That is very good. That's kind of how you want the World cup to go.

Yeah, it's not going to happen. It's going to be India or New Zealand, but it's still great.

I've seen that you. I did see a few quotes on the Internet whilst I was on my week off and I saw you were fighting, fighting some fires.

Me fighting fires? Someone at the ICC came up to me and was like, you love a headline, don't you? And I was like, no, I'm just speaking the truth. And the truth is crossy that we knew and we said on the podcast before the World cup, it's monsoon season.

Yeah. Yeah. And you're not the only one that said it. Like, so. I saw Soph Divine have a. There was a quote from her saying. It's just disappointing, isn't it? It's just you don't want to be sat here watching the rain for a start in a World cup when you've waited four years to play in this event.

Yeah. And for a lot of the girls here, it's not just Sophie Devine. For a lot of them, it's their last ever one and it's really disappointing knowing that it's gonna rain, knowing that you're gonna get a washout, knowing that it's gonna be rain affected. Actually, it should be like yesterday, England versus India, where you know that you're gonna get a 50 over game in and if there's a shower, it's probably only gonna be an hour.

Yeah, yeah.

I know you can't control the weather and I know that, but cricket is a summer sport, which is why we play it in countries during the summer.

Well, you can't control the weather, but you can control when you put a global tournament on in people's monsoon season, that feels controllable in my head.

Yeah. The big quote that I said yesterday, it's ruined the World Cup. It's been a real shame and has ruined the World cup. And it's not. There's certain stories that obviously haven't been Ruined. But New Zealand having washed out games, Sri Lanka playing all, most of their games in Sri Lanka and barely playing any cricket.

Yeah, well, this must be affecting Pakistan the most because they'll have the most games in Sri Lanka, won't they?

They've got all their games in Sri Lanka. So I think the thing for me is the weather was really predictable going into the tournament. We knew what was going to happen and it's happened.

Yeah, yeah. And yeah, like I said, I think 50 over cricket, you don't. You just want. 50 over cricket is designed to allow the best team to win over a long period of time. As soon as you shorten that game down, it becomes a different, a whole different ball game, literally.

Yeah, it's been really interesting to see who's liked my quote and like, do you know, like cricketers from around the world that like, oh, that's a good. Normally it's like, oh, stay away from that. But everyone's getting on board with it and I think that shows how frustrated everybody is.

Yeah, I've seen a fair bit of stuff actually around the frustration of the scheduling of the World cup and like the venues that they've chosen in India. They're not like headline venues, are they? I fully understand you have to take cricket out to places, but when you're playing in a World cup, you want it to be like the showcase pieces. You want to think about playing in England. You want to be playing at Lords and the Oval and Old Trafford and all the big places. Like you don't want to be that. It doesn't feel like the time to be trying to grow the game. It feels like the time to be embracing what we've got in within the game and using the crowds and the fans that have already been created through the WPL and things like that.

Yeah, yeah. I do feel like from 2017, 2022 even to now, the game has changed so much. Like obviously 2017, we were at the likes of Leicester, Derby, Bristol, they'd been like great supporters Taunton, great supporters of women's cricket. But when you look at what fixtures we've got coming up and venues in 2026, it's like Edgbaston Oval, Lords, Old Trafford, you know, it's like back what, what I think what we deserve, really, to be honest with you.

Yeah. And I remember thinking, when I saw that this World cup was in India, so that would have been over four years ago, around four years ago probably. I remember thinking, wow, that's going to be flagship, that's going to be the big event that catapults like, it felt like we kind of caught something in 2017, but never caught it properly to use it. And then New Zealand's on the other side of the world. So, you know, you like as good and big. And that final is absolutely mega. And, you know, there was a lot of people there supporting. Feels like India was the one that was going to be able to like, really grab the ball by the horns and like take women's cricket further. And I'm from a distance, I'm not sure that I've seen that India games.

Yes. I think there's, you know, yesterday, 20,000 people sold out the Australia India game. Yes. But everything else, the games have been really quiet, really struggling to sell tickets in Sri Lanka, obviously the venue has become free, so you can just walk in and, you know, you don't have to buy tickets for those venue, that venue anymore in Colombo. And obviously with the having to move the final or the semi final from Bangalore. But I guess there's going to be a semi final in Navi Mumbai, which is like the home of women's cricket apparently here in India. That's where I played the test match, the finals there. I. I don't think I've ever been, but I could be lying because I've definitely played cricket in Mumbai loads.

No, I don't think you will have been to Navi Mumbai because I hadn't up until the WPL that I commentated on the first one.

Yeah. Okay, there we go then. There we go.

Does that moon have a. Yeah, it was.

Yeah, I remember because you stayed on the ground. Is that what you said?

On the ground?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you were like, whoa, my hotel room is literally overlooking the ground. And I was like, yeah, Shame you can't watch from your room because you're commentating.

Yeah, that was also parasite. That was parasite hotel. I was really poorly in that hotel.

Yeah.

But England grabbed defeat from absolutely nowhere yesterday.

What's the. Getting victory from the clause of defeat. What's the phrase?

Yeah, that. That's it. That's it. Victory from clause of defeat.

But they did it the opposite way around.

Snatched victory.

Whatever they did, honestly, was wild crossing. It was such a good game. I was like a kid at Christmas. Finally a good game of cricket.

Did England win it or did India lose it?

Honestly. Honestly, India lost it a lot.

Smriti's. Smriti's had a fair bit of heat on her, hasn't she?

Yes, she. Yeah, it wasn't good. Her dismissal Wasn't good.

Did you see her press conference?

She looked really sad.

Did you hear what she said about it?

No.

So she said she took full kind of ownership and was like, yes, we collapsed, our shot selection was poor. And she said that she takes full responsibility for the collapse starting with her because they were kind of cruising at that point. And she said that she was trying to get that ball more over cover. So she was like, yeah. So she was like, it was a mistake. But she was then saying how the whole inning she'd been talking about not talking to herself, sorry about not going aerial, not going aerial, not going aerial. And then that happened and she was like, the emotion just takes you. And she was like. And that it just really interested. Because in that moment I'm going, smithy, what? Where's that come from? You've not played that shot all day. And then that happens. And it is probably a really tiny insight into how cricket is played mostly in your head.

It was there to go over extra cover as well. But I was thinking back to when we played in 2019 and Lindsay was playing as well. Lindsay Smith was playing and she was our matchup to Mandana because she would go around the wicket and go straight across her and Mandana would just biff it down long off throat. And that was the plan, wasn't it?

Yeah. That was six years ago. I know.

And then I was like, oh, my God, this is such a throwback.

Yeah, yeah, it was, it was. But also that was T20 cricket.

Yeah. And it felt a little bit like she'd been so disciplined and then her eyes just went, that's got my name on it.

Yeah.

And that again, same with Deepti Sharma.

This is, I think what I was trying to allude to just before is that 50 over cricket kind of ekes out those situations and it gets. It gets rid of the crap in a way. Because you can't. Yeah, you can't fake 50 over cricket because you have to do your skills for longer. Like T20 cricket. If she gets out on 88 playing that shot, you're going, fair enough, take the game on. But in 50 over cricket, the responsibility probably did lie on her shoulders to get them a lot closer than 50 runs. What are you doing? What are you doing?

Then deep Tish Armor Eccleston's got two balls left and she slugsweeps her and gets out.

And how hard is Sophie to slug sweep?

She's like the hardest player in the world to slug sweep. It was wild. It was a wonderful game. And do you Know what? India should have won, could have won. They were in total control. But I think it's been a. It showed a real mindset shift in this England team of stay in the game. Be like, they're showing a lot more grit. Like, when their backs are against the wall, like, they're not. There's no panic. It's almost like Nat's. Like, it's okay, all we need is one wicket. Like, there's no panic whatsoever. Stick to your plans. You know, keep things really simple. Everything looks calm out there. So rather than finding ways to lose, we're finding ways to win. And it's. There's been some real strange games of cricket in this World cup, and they've been really gritty, but also they've shown what this team could be about now.

Yeah.

So it's been really interesting, and I'm really interested to see how we go against the world's best team. And Heather said that in her interview yesterday. She said, yeah, we've got a good challenge against the world's best team, and let's just see how we go.

That's just reminding me I've got two things. The question that I posed to Smudge Midge on the in the Dream podcast was about going up against us, and obviously for us, that Australia is the big test. It had been India previously, as in how we played against them in the summer meant yesterday's game felt a big game, whereas maybe in the past it might not have felt as big a game.

Yeah.

So that was the first question that I posed to Alyssa on the podcast. And the other thing was, can we please just give a little shout out to Heather Knight? 300 games for England, and then you go and get 100 and probably save your team and then get your team into a winning position.

So good. So. So she was amazing. And obviously, you know what she's like. She doesn't like the attention, so she was like, okay, I just need to concentrate on winning this game and getting runs. And I think 300 games for your country is actually just wild, isn't it?

I think you'll know the stats, but I only know Danny Wyatt got to that recently. I'm guessing Lottie has.

Yeah, I think there's five of them, six of them. There's not many, but it just shows, like, through all the injuries that she's had, like, her poor hamstring's been hanging off on a number of occasions, and just her determination and, I guess, love for the game.

I just want to call the media out, though. A little bit, because they're going down the really easy headline of, oh, she's not captain anymore. It's freed the reins and freed the shackles and she's this really, like, brilliant batter. She was our best batter in the ashes. I don't think the calonge seat has ever affected Heather's batting. She's been that batter for a long time. I think what has given her the fire in her belly in this World cup is the injury. I think her being on the sidelines all summer, not knowing if she's going to make it, obviously probably likely going to be her last World cup as well. 50 over World cup, then, like, that's the fire in the belly. It's nothing to do with the captaincy in my head because she's not, in my opinion, changed how she's battered.

No, not at all. And she's the same batter if, like, you know, she's still. She was our most skillful batter. You're right. And she definitely has been. Her and Nat are so important for this England side. But I'm with you. The captaincy never affected her. Like, it's something she loved doing and she actually said yesterday it's something. It's a new adjustment and she's got to find different ways of finding that fire in her belly. In a way. Yeah, she's doing it.

Yeah. But I just think it was. It felt like quite an easy throwaway comment to make when actually that's in my head. That doesn't feel like the case at all.

No, neither in mind. I think she's just an absolute jet.

Yeah. And when you say it, most skillful player in our team. I actually think she's got the best cricket brain in terms of reading situations. I think if it's the classic question, if someone was to bat for your life, who would it be? And it'd always be Heather Knight.

Yeah. Yeah. She's shown that in this World cup, she's bite through great situations and bad situations and done well.

Right. We've had a WhatsApp message.

Oh, no, wait. Before we do that, did you see the woman in the crowd with a no ball sign at the World Cup?

Yes, I did. We got tagged in that, didn't we? I've got a bone to pick with her, though. Felt really too soon. It felt really too soon to be an ex England cricketer. And she said two ex England cricketers host Snowballs, the cricket podcast, and it just felt like a real knife.

Yeah. I purposely didn't reshare it because you text Me saying, that's a dagger.

It just felt wow. Like, yeah, it's accurate, but do we need to say out loud, I'm out of therapy to work through this, guys. Can we just give me another month, Another two months, please. Bit of a wiggle room.

Just shows how quickly people move on. It's savage.

Do you know, I remember when Lydia retired and Robbo was head coach and we did a chat. Robert did a chat. You're probably in the room. You must have been. And everyone was obviously, like, it was the first major retirement that I'd been a part of. And Robbo was like, no one's died. No one has died.

We were all a bit like, a.

Bit shell shocked, weren't we, like? And he just said that and I was like, oh, he is right. Like, we. We do just carry on. And that is. That's probably how I felt during this World cup, actually. I've just been like, okay. Yep. That's chapter.

It's a horrible feeling, though, isn't it? It's that it's, in a way, the loneliest feeling because. Not because. Not because you get over the fact you're not there. It's all your friends have just carried on.

Yeah. And they're obviously gonna. They're gonna.

But, yeah, it would be weird if they're constantly ringing you, going, miss you, how are you?

Yeah.

They've got to work up to concentrate on. But it is just really. It. It's lonely is how I would describe it.

Yeah. Yeah, good. Probably a good way to describe it. Anyway, We've had a WhatsApp. Had one from Les. Les said, I heard you mention on a recent episode that you might reintroduce X. Oh, we keep doing this, don't we? Say we'll do something, then we forget about it. So thank you, Les, for reminding us. I might have one for you. My daughter was chatting with a female friend and the talk somehow got onto showers. The friend, oh, we've had this one. The friend said that when she has one, she doesn't wash her legs.

Yeah, we've had that.

This is. But all this is like circa 2018 chat. I think her thought is that when the water just runs down, it washes them for her. Neither of us could get our head around it. I do this.

I do this too. Unless I've got dirty knees.

Yeah. Or unless I've played sport and then I'll. Like, if I've played golf and I've got mud, I will make the effort to wash my legs.

Yeah.

During the summer Over a beer at my cricket club, I asked the guys what they did. And out of two teams, only one. Is this a nick or don't either of you wash your legs in the shower too, Les? Yeah, I think more people do this. More people do this than his.

You're telling me you're getting your. Your leg up, you're giving it washing the bottom of your feet? No, it washes in the. It washes in the water.

It does wash in the water because the shower gel runs down your leg. So it washes for you.

Yeah, you wash the bits that need washing.

Here's one. Do you wash your neck?

No, but I have always been told to wash behind your ears. But it's really hard on. Not a hair wash day.

Yeah, but I never, like. I'll always wash my face or like exfoliate my face, but then I'll never after really think about consciously washing my neck.

I've never, never washed my face, have I?

No, you don't wash your face.

No, I just let the water run on it a bit. Like my legs.

Yeah. I mean, if you're doing it for your legs, why not do it for your face?

I just. I don't know. I've just always had clear skin and I don't want to start washing it just in case. That's why it's clear.

Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. That does make sense. People can email us all because we know that we're having helion. So people can see. Send specific emails in for Alyssa.

They can, they can. Because all my podcast notes were just notes for Healy this week.

I don't think I've got anything on the podcast notes. No, I do, I do. I've got think of some mix.

Nice.

I've obviously looked at that in the last week. Oops.

The thing is, all week I've been like, oh, it gives me a bit of the ick that.

I know we talk about icks all the time.

You talking about magic is like really wholesome and it brings out this child in you. But the word magic gives me the ick.

Well, it probably got the best out of me at 8 in the morning. Maybe just got some magic.

If here's one for you. You went on a first date, it goes, well, this is like red flag. Is this, as usual, deal breaker on the podcast, me and Crossy play Red Flag, Green flag or what is it?

Red flag, deal breaker, business as usual.

Right. So the red flag is like, oh, it's a bit of red flag. You can get past it. Deal breaker Is no, done, dusted. We're never seeing this bloke again. And a business usual is. Yeah, that's fine. Carry on. So you go on a first date, Crossy. It's really, really have a really nice time. You get to know him. Let's just say you're on your fourth date. And he goes, do you want to come watch what I do?

I know what you're gonna say. And it's business as usual.

And he. And he's a magician, but he's not. He's not, like. He's not in this magic circle. He's, like, starting out as a magician.

No, I'd support that because if he could get into the magic circle and I could meet Darren Brown, then.

So you're using.

Oh, there was a point where he. He had a pack of cards in his hand. I've got some cards here, actually. He had a pack of cards in. He had a pack of cards in his hand and he went like that. I saw the cards in his hand. He went like that. And he turned it into a clear Perspex thing that said his name on it. Like, where did the cards go?

There you go. So that business as usual for crossing a magician.

Love magic. If people have got videos that they want to send in of their magic tricks, I would happily watch them all day.

Oh, my God. We could get guests on to show us their magic tricks.

That's what I'm here for. I would. I'd watch that all day.

Okay. There we go. That is how we're gonna get a crossing through the winter.

Yeah, Magic. Maybe I should take up magic. Maybe I should become a magician.

Oh, I love you so much.

Don't tell me that you don't find it impressive. Excuse me. I'm yawning because it's 8 in the morning. Don't find me that you don't find magic impressive. Because if you don't, you're lying. You're just not anyone, though. Not just you. Anyone.

Yeah, I find it impressive, but I also know it's fake.

It's distractions, Al, and it's manipulations. But how is it that good that you can just turn? Like, when I got the spoon back, it was rock hard. I couldn't move it.

Yeah, Wild. I can't believe you left it. You were so impressed with it at the time.

I know. It was a late night, right?

You're back in rehab.

Don't forget to email us on noballspodcastbc.co.uk.

Noballspodcastbc.Co.Uk. it's so good.

You can also WhatsApp us on 033-01-231826.

Or text us on 811-double-1 and start.

Your message with no balls or one word, please, so that we know it's for us.

I had something to sign the podcast off with. Oh, bye. And this is no Balls, the magic podcast. This week we barely talked about cricket.

I need to get the spoon. I need to get Finn. Has Finny text you back?

No. No, he hasn't. He's probably like, why is Alec text me who's the lemon? At 7am?

Is that what you said? Who's the lemon?

No, I said, he's got the lemon.

All right, good. I was gonna say because you. That's not right.

Who's 11?

I'm 11. He's got the lemon.

I've got the lemon. Bye.

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