Episode 157: Come on a Double Date with Us! (“Know Ya Boo” Part 2)

I'm coming back.

You are still behind by two.

That's right. It was three a little while ago, though.

What's something that gives me the heebie jeebies?

Clowns or puppets?

No. Hello, and welcome to the Pillow Talks podcast. We're your hosts, Vanessa and Xander Marin. I'm a sex Therapist with over 20.

Years of experience, and I'm just a regular dude. We share the ups and downs in our relationship while giving you step by step techniques for improving yours.

Make sure you subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors, and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you'd had. Welcome to our double date. We have a very special episode for you today.

Date night, baby.

It is date night. So way back when we recorded episode 100, we decided to celebrate a milestone episode with the ultimate round of Know Yaboo. So if you don't get that reference, it's from Parks and Rec. It's a little game show that Tom Haverford puts on. It's kind of like the Newlyweds game, where it's like you get questions about your partner, and the whole thing is to see how well you know your partner. How well do you know Yabu? So we thought, you know what? We had so much fun with that episode. It's been a year, right?

Year later, it has been a year, because What? This is 156. This is episode 156. So that's 56 weeks.

You're in the wrong episode. It's 157.

Oh, God. I am in the wrong. I just tapped into the wrong one. It's 157. So it's 57. It's over a year because the year is 52 weeks. You had to think about that. It is 52 weeks when it's not 54, when you aren't taking any weeks off, when we. We give you pillow talks every single week. We have not taken a week off ever since the inception of this podcast.

So anyways, we decided, let's repeat this game and let's, you know, have some fresh new questions. But we'll also turn it into a, like, a double date type of thing because we got a lot of feedback from people saying we listened to that episode together and we paused it when, you know, before you gave your answers and we gave each other our answers. So we kind of, like, played alongside with you, and we thought that was so cool. So let's do it again and. And make it official this time that it is a double date.

I feel like also, I mean, it could be a double date night at home. This would be such a good long car ride, road trip activity.

Oh, yeah.

This like the. The miles would fly by.

All right, so grab your partner. Get ready to play Grab your boo.

Grab your boo.

Know your boo.

You better know your boo and your boo better know you.

Oh, boy, you almost got that. I did almost got it out. No, you had a little. You slipped a little bit.

You better know your boo and your boo better know you.

There you go.

Boom. Speaking of knowing each other better, we transition. We need to know what you think about our podcast. Oh, my God. That was cringe. That was really cringey. But I think we're probably not going to re record it. So you're just going to get to enjoy that horrible transition. Before we get into know your boo, we're going to get into this week's review of the week. Honesty and openness is healing. My wife and I started listening a year ago after graduating from sex therapy. We get as much, if not more from Vanessa and Xander as we got from in person therapy. The topics are always great, but we get the most from listening to two people that we respect talking frankly about their sex life. It is inspiring and liberating for us. And our sex life is reinvigorated after 17 years of marriage.

Wow. Amazing. Thank you so much for this lovely review. So if you have not heard us talk about reviews before, there's a very big, very important reason why we do them. It's not just to make ourselves feel better, although we definitely do get a big kick out of reading your reviews. But it's also the best way to help the podcast grow. When you have more reviews on a podcast, Spotify and Apple are more likely to feature it. People are more likely to listen because they see like all these great reviews. So it really does make a huge difference. So we would really appreciate it if you love pillow talks. If we've given you a good tip, we've made you laugh. You just wanna support us out of the goodness of your own heart. We would really appreciate you taking a few seconds to leave us a review. So here's how it works. If you've never done it before. Cause I'll be honest, I had never left a review of a podcast before either. So you go to the main pillow talks page on Apple Podcasts. Scroll to the bottom and you'll see the review section there. So there's just a little box. You type it in, and once you leave that review, you are automatically entered every single week going forward. Review of the week giveaway. So if you hear your review read in an episode, email us@infomtherapy.com and you will get a prize. Just our little way of saying thank you for taking the time. Okay, so let's get into it. We have in front of us 50 questions. We're gonna see how many we get through.

Are we keeping score?

I think we have to keep score. We kept score last time, and I won by a landslide.

What actually happened last time was that we not talked about keeping score in advance when we were planning out, like, the concept of this episode. And then in the moment as we got started, I was like, wait, babe. Like, should we keep score? And Vanessa's eyes lit up in a way I barely ever see. Like, the. The competitive nature in her came out full force, and she was like, oh, my God, I cannot believe we didn't think of that. Like, of course we're gonna keep score.

I'm not a very competitive person anymore. But it really did come out. Like, I was like, well, I can be competitive about this. About knowing you better than you know me.

Yeah, I knew. I knew that you were going to win from the beginning.

Do you think I'm going to win again today?

I do.

That's no fun.

I'm going to try harder this time.

You weren't trying very hard last year.

I mean, I think that I would like to win. Okay.

You would like to win.

I would like to win. I'm going to. I'm going to do my best. I. I think that. I think that I could do better today.

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Yeah. We have tried a lot of sheet sets over a very long period of time trying to find the perfect sheet set. And as soon as we found Cozy Earth, it was game over.

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It was love at first sight. But also, I have to say, after like, five or six washes, it was next level for me.

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Yes. Then I was like, holy crap, what happened to these sheets in these couple of washings?

Kind of like the beginning of a relationship. It's like, ooh, I'm really into this person. And then, you know, you start going on a couple dates, you start doing it a couple of times and all of a sudden you're like, oh, I did not know this could be this good. That was our experience.

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Okay. How are we going to do this? Are we both just blurting it out at the same time?

No. Why don't you. You ask me the questions first.

All right. Do I think it's okay to leave socks on during sex?

No.

Yes.

What?

I don't really care.

You wouldn't care if I wore socks during sex?

I take my socks off because I know it's not okay with you. Your answer is no.

Yes. My answer is no.

So I always take my socks off. I really could care less.

Really? You wouldn't think it was weird if I was totally naked but just had socks on?

I mean, it's kind of like how I don't care if you have your aligners in. I don't care if you have your face tape on your frownies or whatever they are. It's still you. It doesn't like. It doesn't impact you.

I forgot about that. Oh, I'm so mad. If I had taken a second more to think about that, I would have said you wouldn't care.

Story of this whole Game. If I had taken another second. All right, let's do it.

Okay. What is my perfect sandwich?

Trick question. Toast with butter. You would never choose a sandwich willingly. And you would you also. Question. You would also. You would also never have a clo. Like, if you're going to have bread, it's going to have butter. It's going to be open faced. Not a sandwich. It's not even a butter. It's not even a butter. Sandwich is not the answer.

I can't believe you.

Did he write that?

I wrote trick question, toasted butter. I didn't know. I did say I don't love sandwiches.

Oh, well, I mean, I should get two points for that because I got trick question, and I actually got one point. I got what the answer should have been. You know, it's what it should have been.

Oh, my God.

That's.

That was good. Shit. You're off to an impressive start. Okay, I said that you would say like turkey, brie, cranberry.

No. You know, or.

Or would you say a, like, what is that, like pastrami or something? Like a corn Reuben. A Reuben, yes.

You know what? So I'm. I wrote Reuben down originally. Then I changed it to Cuban sandwich because we used to live in la. We used to live next to this Cuban place that I think actually closed down recently. And that was like, had one of the best Cuban sandwiches in the country. It was so good. But what I just remembered my favorite sandwich. You should know this. It's like the one sandwich I regularly order. It's a banh mi.

Oh, all right. I was just thinking more like traditional sandwich, you know?

Yeah. I mean, I'm also like, not a huge sandwich guy, but I do. I do like a Reuben. I try not to eat that much beef, though. So, like, I order Reuben's very few and far between.

All right.

I like the. There's a place that we order from that does a chicken shredded chicken banh mi, which I know, not traditional, but I just like the flavor and like the veggies and all the herbs and it's just perfect.

All right. What is something you gifted me that you think I pretended to like the.

You didn't even pretend that. Well, the fold up laundry rack that I gave you for Christmas.

Oh, that was a good one. No, I said the phone sanitizer.

Oh, God, I. I forgot about that. It is collecting. That thing doesn't even work.

I know, I know.

It's too late to send it back. That was. That was a. That was a.

That was a real clunker.

Of it. The funny thing, though, is that gift, she had a different version of this phone sanitizer that she wanted.

It's like a phone toaster. I really wanted it. And you're like, oh, I'll get the cheap version of it that doesn't do the toasting thing.

Oh, my God. I'm curious, though. If I had actually gotten the product.

I would have used it every day. Because what was cool about that one is you literally just toast it, and it, like, comes right out and it's sanitized. But the one that you gave me, I have to leave my phone in it for, like, hours at a time to sanitize.

Well, so the reason I got that for you is because you had also expressed liking the idea of, like, not having your phone readily accessible when we're sleeping at night. And I was like, oh, this is this phone sanitizer that's also a wireless charger. And you close it up in there.

It doesn't do both at the same time.

I didn't know that we got scammed.

All right, I said that you would say that surf rinse thing that I got you. Or maybe those loafers that I. That was, like, the first gift. Nice gift that I got you. And you never wore them.

You know, I didn't know. But I will give you credit. I'll give you credit for the. The. The loafers I wanted. Like, I think I picked them out original. Like, I think I told you that I wanted them. And then I realized that they were, like, too uncomfortable to be house slippers, and they were, like, too thin. Thin to actually wear outside of the house in public. And so they were just, like, a bad gift. But I'll give you a point.

Okay.

For that. Or wait, what was the other one? You said, I'll give you a point for that.

Surf rinse.

No, I like that. I used that until the thing broke. Okay.

All right. Say someone is on the phone claiming to be me. What question would you ask to prove it's me?

Well, I would ask a question that we are. Another question that we have later on. But I would say, what's your first dog's name?

Oh, no. I said, what's our nickname for each other?

Okay, what would I say?

I said you would say the same thing.

Oh, that's what I put.

So you put it as your answer, but not as my answer?

I did. I feel like I should still get a point for that.

No.

Are we, like, tied up now?

Yes, tied.

I shouldn't have given you a Point on that last one. I kind of want to take that away from you.

You can't. Too late. We're moving on. Who is my favorite author?

Sarah J. Maas.

No.

Oh, come on.

No, not my favorite. Marisha Pessl.

What? I've never heard that name in my life.

You should have, because it's my favorite author. I said yours is the Mars. No, wait. Kim Stanley Robinson.

There you go. Wow.

Okay. What is the first piece of clothing that I put on after I shower?

Like yoga pants or sweats.

Yes.

Bottoms comfies.

I said you put on boxers.

I, I, I've learned from you to wear boxers, underwear, whatever you want to call them as minimally as possible. I put yoga pants or sweats because I think that's more something where I more commonly put on after a shower.

You wear. I don't know. I feel like you wear underwear pretty frequently.

I try not to.

I feel like that's, like, half a point.

Sure, whatever. Okay, you can have half.

No, it's fine. I won't take a point. Okay. What is my favorite spot for you to touch during foreplay?

All right, if we're getting explacit. If we're getting explicit, I'm just gonna go for clit. But if we are not getting too explicit yet, I would say it's like the back of your head. Hair area.

Correct. I'll give you a point for that. I said penis.

Yes. You got it. I'm a simple man.

Okay, what is the weirdest dream I've had recently?

Something about losing teeth.

No, I haven't had one of those recently.

Okay.

I said this was a hard one. It's not. I wouldn't call it weird, but I've had a lot of dreams about Winston, our pug. The past. We're coming up. Actually, by the time this episode comes out, it'll have been a year since he passed. I said your answer would be that one that you had about me, like, teasing you sexually.

Well, that one wasn't particularly weird. I actually wrote something about losing my teeth because I did have. I did have a dream like that recently, and I feel like we talked about it, but I don't remember the details, but I was like. That was super weird for me because I. That's like a you kind of thing to have dreams about losing your teeth. I never do, and then now I have.

All right, no points for either of us. Would I pick pancakes or waffles?

Pancakes.

Yes. And you would pick waffles.

Yeah, you got it. I thought you were gonna say Pancakes. No, I know. You always have pancakes. And we. We have a waffle maker. I love waffles, but they're just a little more tiny. They're a pain in the ass. You only make one at a time.

Yeah.

I do love them, though. We should make waffles more often.

What's my go to road trip snack?

Chomps.

No.

What?

Well, I said jerky. Chomps is like, sort of a. I.

Think I should get a point for that. It's a meat stick.

I think we should get some money from Chomps for calling them out. They're not a podcast sponsor.

Sorry, Chomps.

I said you would say chips or gummy candy.

I actually wrote the chicken chips that I've been eating.

Chips. Yeah, yeah, but I totally get a point for that.

But I'm eating just chick straight chicken. Is chicken an egg white?

They're so foul.

They're so good.

Okay, which one of us do I think would have the best chance of survival on a deserted island?

I'm gonna say we both said me.

Yes.

Done.

So we both get points for that, right?

Yeah, yeah, we do both get points for that. Okay, what's the score?

I'm ahead by one.

That one I gave you?

I didn't take it.

It's a fake one.

I didn't take it.

Oh, you took it away? Yeah. Okay.

What's the first gift you ever bought me?

Oh, my God. I have. No. I. I just don't know.

I said. Can't remember. Point for me. I think that those loafers were, like, the first gift that I bought you because that was after I was in the hospital with a really bad uti. You had to take a lot of care of me, and so I bought you a very nice gift that you then never used.

All right. Yeah, I don't remember, so I'll give you that point.

Question number 13. What is my go to cheer me up activity?

You know what I said Both of us would just say laughing. No. Wow. Okay.

I said, you dancing?

Oh, God.

Come on. And I said your answer would be a hug.

Mm, yeah.

Come on. A hug that always cheers you. I get a point for that.

Sure. Okay.

1000% sure. I know you better than you know yourself.

Thank you.

What band?

That's why we're together.

Question 14. What band is the soundtrack of my youth?

Jimmy Eatworld. What do you think I was gonna say?

There were a lot of bands that were the soundtrack of my youth. It was difficult to pick.

Jimmy Eat World is. And if you hadn't said Jimmy Eat World, I would have made a strong case for why it should be.

Okay. I said to me, it depended on what we were defining as a youth, because if it was younger, it would be like the Beatles, but if it was a little bit older than, like, Sublime or that. Like Expendables.

There you go. All right. I put the Expendables.

Okay.

Santa Cruz. That was. That was Santa Cruz's version of Sublime.

All right. When I was a kid, what did I want to be when I grew up?

Okay, I said marine biologist, but I also have to get a point if it's sex therapist.

No, I did write marine biologist. All right, and you wanted to be an astronaut.

Yep.

All right, points all around. What is my least favorite piece of clothing to go shopping for?

Bras.

No. Because I just refuted. Refused to wear them.

But that. That's why I should be right, because no bathing suit. Oh, God.

Bathing suit is way worse than bra.

Oh, God.

And I said your answer would be shoes.

It is. Yes, it is. I finally bought some shoes, and I couldn't even bring myself to go to a store that sells shoes, so I ordered a bunch in the mail.

Question number 17. Would I ever send back food to the kitchen at a restaurant?

Yes, I've seen you do it.

Correct. And I said, you are not likely to unless it was really bad.

Yeah, but I would. Yeah. So, yes.

Okay. I got it, though. It would have to be really bad, though. Okay. Question number 18. When was the moment I knew I loved you?

Oh, God, this is tough. Like, I can't think of, like, specific moments when you might have loved me. I'm gonna say I said, like, maybe after our first argument, because you felt like, you know, I was there and I was willing to show up and do that with you. Oh, okay.

I said that when we first said it.

When we first said it.

Yeah. That was when I knew I loved you.

Hmm. I think you must have known before that.

No, like, kind of crystallized in that moment. It was like, oh, shit. Oh, shit. And I'm not somebody who sits on their feelings. I felt it, and it was like, oh.

When you tried to get me to say it.

I did get you to say it first. I said that. You said that when we first said it would be the moment. Did you have a different answer?

I said the thing I said in my wedding vows, which was when you. When we were just driving around San Francisco, probably, like, going to a store or something, and a city bus went by, and Vanessa just went, bus. And I was like, this girl is weird. And I like it. We're really comfortable with each other. And I think I love her.

Damn. All right. Wow. Kind of sad that neither of us got points. When was the moment I knew I loved you? Okay, the house is on fire. What is one personal object I could not leave behind? Other than our dogs, obviously.

Oh, my God. Who? I got. I got lost in my list. Wait, I gotta find it. Okay. Okay, here we go.

You should know this one off the top of your head.

Oh, yeah, I know. Walrus.

Yes. And I said Sealy for you.

Yes. I wrote Celie. Those are our little stuffies. Obviously, we would pick the dogs.

It says other than the dogs.

I know.

So we had the exact same little stuffed animal growing up in childhood.

Like, from the moment we were born.

Yeah. The day we were born, we both got this little stuffed seal. And when we moved in together for the first time, we were unpacking bodies, boxes, and I pulled out a little stuffed seal, and I was like, what is Walrus doing in your box? And you're like, this is no walrus.

This is a sealy. This is my seal, and his name is Sealy.

And so we realized in that moment we had the exact same stuffing. It was a very cute, like, little moment of. Just felt like it was meant to be.

Yeah. Except Vanessa's was a little better taken care of than mine.

It was better.

He was in better shape.

Better taken care of.

Is Walrus he or she?

More poorly named.

Is Walrus a he or she?

I think a he, but it's kind of debatable.

Debatable.

What was my childhood nickname?

Shrimp.

No, that was, like, a mean thing that people called me, but it was. No, that's like bullying. That's not a nickname, Lil V. Oh.

I think I should still get a point.

No, I said. You said you had none.

No, my nickname was Xander. My name is Alexander, and my nickname was Xander.

No, that doesn't count.

It became my name.

That is your name.

But, like, in elementary school, it was not my name.

I used to go by that. You said, I want to be called Xander, so that doesn't count. You can't.

Yeah, middle school, but, like my dad, my parents called me Xander.

Other than Xander. Did you have a nickname? No.

Yeah. Oh, I mean, I had a couple, like, mean nicknames that people called me as well. No, but you didn't say any of them.

People bullying you is not a nickname. I get a half a point for none. You didn't have a nickname like your friends.

All right, I get half a point for mine too. Then we both get half a point.

No points for anybody. Fine. All right, what's my favorite concert I've been to?

Let's see. Have you been to a Jimmy? Well, let's just say Jimmy World.

I said I can't name one. Honestly, I couldn't either. No, concerts stick out.

I couldn't either. Really?

I said you wouldn't be able to name one.

Let's just both get points for that.

No, you gave the wrong answer.

I, I. You know what? I wrote veto. Actually, next to this one, I just said Jimmy World because I was like, all right, I'll say something, but I didn't write anything. So I think we both.

No. All right, question 22. What is a topic I know too many details about? It cannot be work related.

Reality tv.

Ooh, I did not write that down, but I'll give you a point for that.

Yeah, Reality TV stars.

I do know way too much about reality tv. It is a little embarrassing.

Boom.

I said that you would say sci fi.

I said spreadsheets.

It's not work related.

It's not my work anymore.

No, but that's too close. I was gonna write spreadsheets, but I was like, no, that's too closely work related.

Wait, so what did you say?

Sci Fi. I don't really like hard sci fi.

I don't. The thing though is that I actually don't read that much. I just, like, read very furiously for like a month when I find a series I like, and then I don't read anything for like six months. I actually am not up on.

No, but you know a lot of details. Like when I asked you the other day to, like, tell me the story.

Of the book that I was reading right then in the moment. Well, of course I knew the details. I was reading the book.

I think I get a point for that. I did not write down reality tv. But I gave you a point for that.

Nah, doggy.

Really? You're not gonna give me a point for sci Fi?

I don't, I don't think so.

Damn rude.

Yeah.

What was my worst trip to the.

ER for the UTI that you got in the first couple of months of us dating. And that's probably the only time I don't know if you've been to the ER otherwise.

Correct. Yours was your knee, like, skiing accident.

I've never been to the er. I don't believe. I can't think of a time I've.

Ever been a time that you had been either. But I didn't know you Guessed one.

Well, too bad for you.

I wasn't there, so I thought maybe you had gone to the er. You've never been to the er?

I don't think so. I've been to urgent care. I mean, I've been to, like, like, the hospital for, like, a surgery, but that was scheduled. An outpatient. I never spent a night in a hospital.

Okay.

Yeah, I don't think so.

All right, number 24 is a real doozy. This is a hard one to get a point for, but rank.

Oh, wait, you've been to the ER Also in Portugal.

Oh, yeah.

E. Coli.

Oh, that was worse.

No, you almost died.

I feel like I almost died with that E Coli, too.

Yeah, no, but you had a. You had, like, 105 fever with the UTI and you were. You were begging me to not take you to the hospital, and I had to just disregard everything that. Vanessa was so embarrassed.

Oh, very early.

I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna be okay. I was like, girl, you're. The Internet says that your brain cells are starting to die and that you will die soon, and I don't care. I'm taking you to the hospital at all.

It was very early on when we had started dating. All right, moving on. Rank, my love. Languages. From most to least important. If you get this right, I'm going to be very impressed.

Okay. I put words of affirmation, number one.

Correct.

Then quality time.

Correct.

Then gifts. Oh, come on. Then I said acts of service. And then touch.

No, you got it totally wrong.

Oh, God. All right, we'll do mine.

Touch number one. Yes. Quality time number two.

Okay.

Acts of service.

Nope.

Words of affirmation.

Yes.

Then acts of service.

Yeah.

Then gifts.

Yep.

Mine was words, quality time, touch, gift, acts.

Oh. So I just was. I was so close. I just had one that was in the wrong order. If anybody gets that. Wow. Like, hats off to you. That's impressive.

Questions.

We both got our first two correct, though.

Yeah.

Which is great. That's pretty good.

All right, question 25. We are halfway through this Fast and Furious round of Know Ya Boo. What is a habit that I have picked up from you?

I said slowing down.

It's not a habit. No, I said drinking water. That's a good one.

All right.

I said that you would say peeing before the shower.

I said getting things done and getting more organized.

These are not habits. You went too broad with this one.

I did.

This is like lifestyle changes.

Yeah. I think we've both influenced each other in positive way. We've both Moderated. Like, we've both pulled ourselves more to be somewhere in the middle.

Okay, question 26. Am I a fan of surprise parties?

Yes.

No, that's correct.

No. Wait. What?

I'm not a fan of surprise parties. What? You love surprises, not surprise parties. So that's different.

Oh, God.

That's totally different.

I threw. I did a. I did a great surprise party for you one time.

You did one and only one time. I don't like, but.

So are you saying, though, that, like, you would like more of them even though you don't like them, or are you saying that you're happy? I haven't.

I'm glad you did the one. It was great. I don't want more surprise parties.

Huh. That's so interesting because you love surprises.

I think it's because I don't like birthday parties. Even though I love birthdays, it brings up my social anxiety. I just feel like nobody's gonna come.

But the whole point of a surprise party is you don't have to worry about that because you don't think you're having a party, and then all of a sudden, all the people are there.

I'm there, and I'm like, oh, nobody's here. I don't have very many friends. I said that you would say, eh.

I said, no, I'm not a fan of surprise parties.

Okay. Do I write in cursive or print? We both get this one. Yeah, you write in print, too.

I'm not sure I could, like, write more than a sentence in cursive. It would be. It would be tough to read.

Am I a glass half full or glass half empty person?

I said, we are both glass half full people.

I also said that. All right, here come the points again. We had a little streak. Points. Do you want to know, or do you just want to be surprised?

I need to know how much better I need to do.

I am ahead of you by three.

Oh, by three.

Okay. What is my go to takeout order when you are not home?

This is a trick question. You forget till it's too late to order, and then you have to scrounge through the kitchen, probably just eating toast and butter. You know, that is too accurate. Oh, I forgot. I forgot the order. Now it's too. Oh, God. It's gonna. It's gonna be too late.

I'll give you a point for that. That is for sure. What happens. I just. I wrote, help.

What should I order?

I'm not good at feeding myself when I'm on my own. It's just not Fun. Yours. Your order is like, meetup Chinese food. Like, just any kind of Chinese food.

I said Chinese food because you hate Chinese food. I gotta get it when I can.

What is my favorite kind of workout class?

Well, I just. I don't know what to call it. Like the dance cardio thing you go to. But now I should. You. Is it Pilates? Yeah, but I think that you have more fun at the other one because you do that more often now.

No, I do them both twice a week.

I don't know.

I said you would say Pilates. You don't really go to group workout classes?

No, I don't like group workout classes. I said personal training, if I was.

Gonna say personal training, but then I was like, that's not a workout class.

I know. I did say Pilates if I have to, because the only by. By the fact that it's the only one I've ever done.

Which one of our guides did I have the most fun developing? So sorry. For those of you listening at home, this is going to be one that you are not really able to answer. But maybe if you own multiple of our guides.

Yeah, what's your favorite?

Which of our guides is your favorite?

And if you don't own multiple guides, go out and buy some multiple guides and then report back on this one. You'll be happy that you did. I promise.

We will put the link to check out all of our guides in the show notes, but it's also just at V courses. All right, so what did I have the most fun?

I gonna say Next Level Intercourse?

No, I said the foreplay guides.

Oh, yeah.

And I said you would say the art of initiation.

No, I said Next level intercourse.

Oh, I was gonna put Next level intercourse.

I had a lot of fun.

All the positions.

Playing around with all the positions with you.

The positions were very fun. We had a good time with that one.

And we had a lot of fun. Like, we had a lot of fun doing them in real life and also fake doing them so that we could work on the directions for how to get in and get out.

I thought it was, for me, the ultimate foreplay guides because we were trying out the techniques on each other and it was like, ooh, that one's really good. We discovered a whole bunch of things that we had never tried before. It was just super sexy and fun. Both Ultimate Foreplay Guides and Next Level Intercourse were super fun to develop because we had to go through all the.

Techniques, but neither of us get a point.

Yeah, nobody gets a point. But you will get points. By getting any of those three guides, because those are. I would say those are our three favorite of all the guides we've maybe ever created.

That was a great little pitch.

Yeah, they really are. They're super fun. All right, what is a podcast that I love?

I'm gonna say we can do hard things.

Yes, you can. You can get a point for that. I said you would say that. Haberman and Middlekoff.

Yeah, but now it's. Now it's just. Now it's just Haberman.

Oh, what happened to Middlekoff?

Middlekoff got. Middlekoff works for.

Did they break up?

No, they didn't break up. It was like. It was like they were, like, both just. Both doing their own career things. And Middelkoff started working for Colin Coward and, like, does his own podcast with him and join stuff with him. And so they weren't, like. They weren't doing their podcast together very much.

And so they drama.

After. After this last football season, they. They. They split up. They're doing their own thing now. It's just Guy Haberman. But love that guy. I could listen to him all day. If you're out there listening Guy Haberman, who knows, you know, I'm shooting my shot. I love your podcast, bro. Love your podcast. Love the niners.

Okay, question 33. What was the name of my first pet?

I know the answer to that. Oh, shoot. Well, I was gonna say the first dog. However, I don't want to say that in the podcast because that might be, like, a.

My whole family.

But what I just realized in saying this is that. But before. Oh, my God, our dog almost just vomited. She's okay, though.

She's upset that she's not the first pet.

She's choking on a hairball. I'm pretty sure it's all good. Are you okay, Maggie? Oh, yeah, there we go.

There we go.

Choke that hairball down, girl. I was gonna say. I was gonna say you had, like, all kinds of weird pets, like gerbils, rats. I don't know, all kinds of things. And I don't remember any of their names.

Not a single name. Damn. I was gonna give you points for it if you could come up with any name, because I honestly can't remember which one was first.

So I don't get a point for the dog name.

No.

Okay.

No, there was, like, Sammy the Bunny, Chippy the guinea pig, or. No, Chippy was the hamster. Espresso was the guinea pig. There was also Decaf the bunny. There were two bunnies. Sammy was first, though. There was also Squirmy and wormy. The rats and a lot of goldfish. I actually could not remember. So I know it was a dog. Like a German shepherdy dog. And it bit you like something with a dog.

Not a German shepherd.

Like a Mila or Maya. Maya.

There you go.

Yes.

There was another one though. That was a cat.

Otis.

Otis.

No, Odie. Oh, Bee. Obi the cat.

That's way later, girl. You knew Obi.

Live forever.

Rasta.

Oh, Rasta.

Rastaman.

But okay, Maya, that counts.

You got it.

What animal would I choose to be? And why, speaking of animals.

A dog. So that you could experience what it's like to be a dog and just be happy and loved.

I said specifically one of our dogs.

Oh, okay.

And I said you would say the same.

I would.

Okay, points for Everybody. Question number 35. What was I wearing when we met?

You were wearing like black bottoms and a white sleeveless top. Or a light sleeveless top.

Give me more detail.

Not halter.

Like give me details on the bottoms.

I mean, probably just like black jeans or something.

No, you get no points.

What you were wearing. You were wearing like a light thing that like went up to here.

I was wearing a white T shirt and a black skirt.

Oh, black skirt. Well, black bottom. Come on. I said a black bottom.

I said, I would give you a point if you could remember what type of bottom. But then you said jeans. And it was not a sleeveless shirt or a halter shirt.

I'm pretty sure it was a sleeveless shirt.

I know exactly what shirt it was. And it was.

It had a strap over your.

No, it's a T shirt. It had sleeves.

Oh, but they were like down here.

I mean, they were like girl sleeves.

Okay. That's basically sleeveless.

I'll give you. I'll give you 0.5 for that. Okay. And then you were wearing. It was like an Ed Hardy esque top. Had like some gross like crest, like family crest type of thing on it and jeans. And it was kind of like a colors. A taupey, taupey shirt. Like kind of tan, brownish, you know, somewhere in that greenish kind of thing.

No, you are wrong. You are using that. Yep. No, you got it wrong. I did have another. There was another shirt that was that color.

But you know what I was talking about with like the terrible design on the front.

You were right about that.

However, we both get 0.5 points.

Okay, you confused. And what color jeans? Jeans.

Like blue jeans.

What color blue. There's lots of blue jeans.

Oh, my God. No, I don't have to get the wash of jeans. They were like, a dark wash.

Okay, there you go. Dark blue.

That's good, Louise.

All right, half points all around.

What was my high school mascot?

A don. Whatever the that is. D, O, N. In case you're wondering what I mean. A don. D, A W, N. Like.

I actually don't know what yours was. I know they were just, like, the dorks. I just wrote down the dorks.

No, it was a peregrine.

What?

Tara Green falcon.

No, it was not.

If you don't believe me, I can pull out my yearbooks, and it says on there, york. It says York School peregrine on the. On the yearbook.

It's even darker than just dorks.

What's a falcon? You love falcons. You're one of your favorite birds.

Peregrine. Oh, okay, question 30.

All right, I'm coming back. I'm coming back.

You are still behind by two.

That's right. It was three a little while ago, though.

What's something that gives me the heebie jeebies?

Clowns or puppets?

No, but yes.

Yeah. Come on. What. What are you gonna put that is worse than that?

Hazelnuts. We were just talking about this over the weekend.

That's not the heebie. The heebie jeebies?

Yeah. The heebie jeebies? Yes.

No. Hazelnuts give you the ick. The like.

No, they give me the heebie jeebies.

They give you, like, the judgment of others?

Yeah. Heebie jeebies.

No heebie jeebies.

I said you would say peach skin. Yeah, I did.

Cotton balls and peach fuzz.

Yeah.

I think we should both get points for that.

I don't think so.

What would you say?

That clowns and hazelnuts is my clear answer.

I don't agree that they're heebie jeebs.

Scare me. They clowns.

Yeah. That's what hee jeebies are.

No, Heebie jeebies is like, well, I'm creeped out, not scared.

You're creeped out by hazelnuts. You're disgusted by hazelnuts. You don't like the way they taste. You don't get the heebie chibis from, like, food that you don't like.

I do. Moving on.

Agree to disagree on this one.

Question 38. Do I think we should get another dog?

No.

Correct. And I said you would say no as well.

That is also correct.

We.

We can't be outnumbered.

No. What's something I've wanted to learn how to do but haven't yet?

Ugh. I struggled with this one. So I just put pickleball.

No. Speak Spanish fluently. Oh, and I said you would say the same.

I said pickleball.

Damn.

Or golf. I'd like to get better at golf.

What is the first thing I do when I get stressed out?

I said work out. Exercise.

No, I said shut down.

Damn that guy.

I mean, it's on it.

I feel like I couldn't have said that, though, in a. In a nice way.

And I said you would say get flustered.

I said complain.

Get flustered is kind of similar.

Yeah. But I think we'd. Neither of us get points there. All right, we both made a valiant effort.

What is my least favorite kind of physical activity?

I said running.

Yes.

But I jokingly say surfing.

No, I said running for you, too.

Yes.

Question 42. Which podcast episode was my favorite to record? So this is another one that you guys at home probably cannot answer, but you can answer. What's been your favorite podcast episode to listen to again?

This is the tough one. I just said the OG know you boo episode.

Really? No. Smash or pass?

Oh, God, Come on.

Smash your past those. I mean, I think there's three of them now. Those have been my favorite. And I said you would say the same.

I said note your boo.

Oh, wow. Okay. Question 43. What is a song I can't stand?

You can't stand a lot of songs that I like. I. You probably don't even know this, but I actually like. I like. I like the band. I like that band. Greta Van Vliet basically kind of sounds like New age Led Zeppelin, but I don't even dare play them when you're around.

No, I. This was really random. But I said that song, like, do you remember the very first sun of September?

Oh, wait, I know. I know it. You know what?

It's stuck in my head. I think it's just called September, but.

I don't like that sun.

No, but that's the song that I can't stand.

You know what I just thought of it?

What?

It's Toto. Africa.

No, I hate the September song way more. I said that you would say, I don't know. I can't think of anything. Taylor Swift.

The first part is correct. The second half. No, I don't dislike Taylor Swift. I wouldn't know that it was Taylor Swift playing. It would just be a song.

I said not sure.

You get half a point.

Half point for that?

Yeah, you got half.

I said not sure. Yeah, but then you said not sure. Yeah, like I did a little throwaway with Taylor.

Fine, Take your point. Take your point.

All right, number 44. What would my dream job be if I couldn't do this?

All right, I don't know, like, a specific job title for this, but you love repetitive manual labor. I would say, like. I would say, like, packing. Like, packing boxes.

Like, that's my dream job.

Like putting. No, no.

Packing boxes.

No, no. Like. Like when. Like when we sent our book out to people like, you. Like.

Oh, my God.

You like making the little boxes. You just.

That's not my dream job. Jesus. I said my dream job would be, like, working at a luxury hotel, designing, like, all the little special touches to give to guests. Like, little snacks when they check in, or, like, surprises for them. Okay, gosh. I said your dream job would be. I said you wouldn't really be able to think of one in particular, but something you would enjoy would be, like doing something with luxury surf trips.

Yeah, that sounds nice. Okay, fine. You can get a point. You're gonna beat me.

Wow. What happened to all the confidence? You have six questions left.

Okay, let's go.

You can totally come from behind. Where do I not like to be touched?

Like, the. Your sides, like, above the hip or lower belly? Like, it's too ticklish for you?

Yes. Correct. There you go. I said there's not anywhere that you don't like to be touched, but you don't like to be tickled.

Like, I don't like. Oh, I said my armpits. I don't want you to tickle my armpits or. Oh, actually, you know what? No, that's not correct. It is very. There is a spot, and it's my belly button. That is a no. That is a no. Fly zone, baby.

I should have thought of that one.

Okay.

What is my favorite pasta shape? This was really hard.

Oh, my God. I misread this question.

What did you think it was?

Oh, no, I did. Least favorite pasta shape.

Oh, no, that's an easy answer. What is my favorite pasta shape?

Oh, God. We were just talking about. We went out to dinner with a bunch of friends last weekend. We were talking about pasta shapes. In fact, one of our friends was acting them out, which was very entertaining.

It was.

But shoot. Those ones that we got recently that start with an M. No. Or, I don't know, like, orchiette or something.

No, I said little shells.

Little shells. Little macaroni shells.

Yeah. Like, the little ones.

Huh?

I don't know what those are called. I struggled with this. There are a lot of shapes that I like.

Yeah.

That like. But I pick shells. I said that you would be, like, I don't really have a favorite. There are lots that I like. But lately you've been enjoying those little stellenes. Little tiny stars.

Yeah, no, I. I think, like, I would say. Oh, God. What are they called? They're those, like, straight ones that have, like, are kind of ribbed and.

Ribbed for her pleasure.

Yeah. Oh, like I'm gonna say my favorite is Pappardelle.

You just came up with that? I gotta get half a point for the Salines.

I like those. Okay, fine.

What is my favorite reality TV show?

Vanderpump. Come on. You talk about how great Vanderpump is all the time.

Not this season.

Oh, what is it then?

Perfect Match.

Really?

Yeah, it's so good on. On Netflix.

I feel like, on balance, like, all the seasons. Vanderpump.

I'll give you half. You gave me half a point for the Stelleans. I'll give you half a point for Vanderpump.

Okay.

I said you would say Bachelor in Paradise.

Yeah, that's true.

Okay, coming down the final stretch here. Am I a firm pillow or a soft pillow person?

Soft.

Correct. You are firm.

Yes.

What is the best compliment I've given you recently?

Wait, so the best compliment that you've given me recently?

Yeah, I think I might have answered this one wrong.

I'm not sure how I. If I did it right either.

Okay, what's a good compliment that I have recently given you recently?

I mean, this is just general, but I like it when you tell me that I'm a good person.

Oh, okay. I said, like, I see what you're doing and I appreciate it.

I wrote, I see you slash appreciate you. I'm taking a point for that.

Okay. No, but the best compliment that you've given me lately is you're a really great wife.

Oh, wait. Oh, wait. I thought that. I thought your favorite was when I tell you that I see you and appreciate you.

No, my favorite is when you say you're a really great wife.

Oh, you are such a good wife.

I love that. Thank you. No points for either.

Oh, man.

Okay, last question. I love this question. I think it's really funny. What would my warning label say?

All right, your warning label would say. Likely to miss, like. Miss, like, a key part of whatever you say. But be super confident that she knows exactly what you said.

Interesting. No, I said, gets cranky when hungry. Me.

Oh, you.

My warning label.

You do get very cranky when hungry.

Okay, and I would say your warning label would be Full of gas. What did you say yours was?

I don't know. I couldn't think of anything. Wow.

Ending on zero points all around.

On an anti bang.

On an anti bang. Okay, who do you think won?

You won.

By how many points?

3.

5. Zing. Reigning two time champ of know your boo coming in with honestly not that great at 29 out of 50. You got a 24 out of 50.

So we're just hovering plus or minus 50%.

Yeah. This game is. It's hard.

It is. It's really hard.

Surprisingly hard. A lot of these questions are very specific. So, you know, the point is just to have fun. Hopefully you had a few answers that made you laugh, gave you a good little giggle, helped you get to know each other a little bit better. We hope you've enjoyed this double date of know. Yaboo. All right, well, if you're interested in more fun games, more conversation starters, more laughs, definitely make sure you are following us on social. We are at Vanessa and Xander that Xander with an X on all those platforms, all the places we would love to connect with you there. And we share a lot of like kind of prep stuff for these episodes too. So you get little sneak peeks at what are the topics coming up. You help us like weigh in on the topics like answer polls. Tell us what you want to hear more about. It's really fun. So come follow us over on all the socials.

And with that, that's all for today's episode of Pillow Talks. Thank you so much for listening. Thanks for joining our double date. Thanks. Join us again next week when we talk about low libido. Oh, wait, I know, I know it. You know what?