7 DEADLY WORDS Stopping You From Finding THE ONE...

If we were to remove these 6 words from our vocabulary, we would find that attracting love is so much easier than we've been making it. And in this video, I'm going to show you the 6 deadly words that are literally blocking love from coming into your life. Now, the first word that I want to share with you is actually the word itself, word. Now the reason I share this is because even though this isn't a specific word, if we aren't maintaining integrity with what we say we're going to do and who we are, really remaining in integrity with who we are, then we'll find that we attract love that is equal to that lack of integrity. So one of the most attractive things that you can do is you can put out your energy of yourself where you are unapologetic, where you're being the most authentic, real version of you. And what you'll find is that by doing that, what you end up doing is you end up putting out an energy that is attractive to the right people. You will be polarizing as you're being yourself. But what I realized is that when I wasn't living in according to my own word, I was finding many incongruencies in my own life. Now here's an interesting thing. When I was working a 9 to 5 job I wasn't passionate about, Sell women's shoes. I was dating women that did what they loved for a li— No, I attracted women that didn't do what they loved for a living that were also working jobs they felt like they had to work. So we will always attract into our life what is equal to what we are putting out into the world. But if we're not maintaining the energy of the true authentic version of us, then what we end up doing is putting out an energy that isn't as attractive and that isn't as real. So for me, that was something I had to get clear on is because as soon as I started doing what I love, I started only dating women that were doing what they loved. And that's interesting. It's literally a one-on-one reflection. So that's the first word. That's actually an impromptu first word too, because I originally had 6 other words. So maybe you'll get a bonus one here. You'll get 7, but here's the next one that is going to block you from attracting love. Now Here's the thing, to attract love, and especially what I had to do to attract love, is I had to, one, open my heart. That was one thing. And I know it sounds very, it sounds very stereotypical, but I had to open up my heart because I didn't realize that my heart was so closed from past childhood trauma and experience of like not feeling loved, not feeling understood, not feeling seen, that what I had to do is I had to start opening my heart to other people and I had to start looking at myself in a new way. But as I started, uh, like I would actually, when I was going on dates before, when my heart was closed, I was like talking myself out of things. I found that my energy was very constrictive. So one thing I had to do is I had to open up my heart. I had to start being vulnerable. And as I started being vulnerable, um, it was like I started, there was like a vulnerability is when you're, uh, when you're, able to like put the real you out there and you don't feel as apologetic. Um, and it's almost like you open yourself up to where you could get rejected. If you're vulnerable with someone you like and you're like, listen, I like you, that's vulnerable. And they could say, well, I don't like you and you could feel rejected, but it's real. It's authentic. You're remaining, you're remaining consistent to your own word. So one thing I had to do is I had to, uh, realize that the energy I was putting out, the The way I was closing my heart was blocking love. So the key to this is feeling the energy on the inside. And the 6 words I'm gonna share with you, which are actually 7 words now because I've decided to add another one in because I'm just awesome like that, is it's words that are literally blocking you from feeling self-love or from being in your own magnetic frame, which is gonna literally block love from coming in your life. So I'm trying to help you remove the blocks so that you actually attract love, but you don't just attract love, you are love. That's it. So here's the other thing that's going to block you. So you probably noticed from this title, it's 6 deadly words that attract you from the one, the one. So here's the thing. Here's a word that's going to, that's going to block love from coming into your life. The word is the one. You want to know another word? Here we go. Some of y'all are not going to like this. Maybe all the spiritual niche and stuff, you know, and I know I've made videos on twin flame and the one. but I will say that either of these words, what they do is they create what is called oneitis. Oneitis is this belief that there is only one person out there that is meant for us. There's only one person. So when you meet this one person and you start to define it in your belief system as this is the one person that I'm meant to be with, then what we do is we put that person on a pedestal. We have this little pedestal right here. We're down here. And instead of just seeing them as equal, we see them, nope, you are all the way up here on top of the pedestal. Pedestal and you have this halo effect around you. You're like this angel with wings and shit. And then we, we externalize and project all of our stuff and everything needs to go right. And if one thing goes wrong, if they tend, if they spend 20 minutes to text you back and it should have only been 5 because it's normally only been 5, then we feel rejected or we feel like there's something going wrong. And remember this, people feel what you feel and if you feel like they're the one and you feel that kind of energy, then what you end up creating for yourself is a level of codependency and neediness. And a lot of times when it comes to both the one I call also twin flame-itis, twin flame-itis, because there's so many people that watch my videos that are so convinced that there's only one person meant for them in their lives. And when they start defining somebody as either of these labels, they create resistance and they end up blocking the process altogether. So The thing that will block you from love is that you believe there is only one person out there for you, that you believe there's your twin flame soulmate, that you have to force it to work and you have to make everything happen the way you think it's supposed to happen. That will create resistance and that will literally block love from coming into your life. And I know that I've done this in the past. I've had a tendency to put certain people on pedestals that I'm dating and, um, It was this uninitiated masculine energy inside of myself because growing up, I never really had a strong masculine energy role model. My dad let my ex-stepmom run the show. So I was used to also someone that was trying to control me. So for a good period of my life when I was dating, I was dating women that were very controlling and jealous because that felt very familiar to my old childhood dynamics. That felt so familiar to what I was used to. That felt safe. Isn't that the crazy thing? A lot of times people use the one and the twin flame ideology because one of their parents may have left, maybe their other parent, maybe their parents divorced, but one of their parents didn't choose them, or they felt like their parents didn't choose them. So they choose partners that don't choose them. Let that land for a sec because it's so, it's so hard to look at sometimes. I had to become aware that I was choosing people that weren't fully choosing me because I didn't feel chosen growing up and I felt Uh, that felt familiar to me. That felt like what I deserved. That's what I was used to. So we are addicted to familiar patterns and familiar patterns are also familial, family. Isn't that crazy? So we're addicted to energies that remind us of the family childhood dynamics growing up. So one of the words that will block you is the one. If you believe there's only one person out there for you, realize there are 7 billion people on this planet and also realize this. There are certain people, there are maybe certain terms we use, soulmate, twin flame, all these other, you know, these words. Realize we are infinite spiritual beings and that we may have many soulmates within our life that we meet. And sometimes your soulmate might be a family member, maybe somebody you're related to. Doesn't always have to be romantic. But as we start removing these labels, these little labels, we then, we then start to realize we become free. Because one of the best things that people come to me and they say, Aaron, I wanna attract my ex back. I get DMs in my Instagram all the time about this. I wanna attract my ex back. What do I do? The thing to do to attract your ex back is to completely let go. That's it. That's the way you attract them back by letting go. But also you don't even wanna attract them. I'm gonna tell you right now, what you wanna do is you wanna let go just because you wanna let go, not because you wanna get them back. But that's also ironically enough, if you do let go, that's the highest probable chance that you do have of that happening anyways. It's a funny paradox, but let go. So one of the other deadly words you need to let go of is this word right here. I need, need. This is a I need or I want. How about that? I need or I want either of these. If you need or you want someone else to complete you, then you will find that in the present moment right now, because remember, these are all words that are blocking love from coming into our life right now. Then what we end up doing is we end up creating a need or a want is saying this moment right here isn't good enough already. I lack something. Anything we need or want. We are saying I lack it right now. So really one of the biggest keys for me to attracting love, for me being in that love vibration, what it had to do with is it had to do with me getting to the core of my own heart, the core of my own energy, opening up, but realizing and tapping into the self-love that I have for myself and even the love that I have for other people. I had to stop judging other people. I remember my friend Matt, who's a good friend of mine, he would tell me, I'd go on dates and stuff like that, and I would just have all these reasons and I would talk myself out of any intimate connection and, or any type of connection. And I had all these rules and these reasons and it was a form of self-sabotage and also a form of, it was an intimacy block for me. He's like, you're the ninja at talking yourself out of dating. And one of the reasons being is I was trying to protect myself from somebody that was emotionally available that wanted to choose me, That would feel so unfamiliar to me. But because of that, I felt I was in relationships where I felt like I wanted or I needed something and there was like this addiction to that energy because it felt so familiar growing up. Think about this for a minute. There's something called the anxious attachment style, the avoidant attachment style, and then the secure attachment style. Secure means you gave and received love growing up about equally when you were learning that. So it's like you're able to like feel secure in who you are and also hold space for somebody else and not run away from them or, You know, you still have clear boundaries and stuff, but anxious attachment means that you lean in when you want love. So it's like, if somebody feels like they're emotionally unavailable, you lean in to try to fix them, to try to help them. You desire something from them. And then avoidance, what avoidants do is avoidants avoid love. So what happens is instead they pull back. They're like, this isn't safe. I'm gonna get hurt. I don't wanna chance it. I'm good enough being this individual that I am. So there's this thing called the anxious avoidant trap where they tend to attract each other. Avoidants tend to attract anxious, and that's the glue. And the thing is, is what they're working on is healing from the inside out. But imagine that you're a baby. How would this be created? Well, imagine when you're a baby, you're sitting there and your mom and your dad are giving you, you know, giving you love. And then imagine one day you look up and imagine that mom, is completely going through her own process. She's looking around, she's in her head, she's thinking, and then you're there and you're like looking up and you don't know what's going on and you're a baby and you don't know how to interpret a lot of this stuff, but you're just like, there's something wrong, there's something wrong, I feel anxious, I don't know what's wrong with me, what's wrong with me, what's wrong with me? And there's a core belief that's developed that says there's something wrong with me, I'm broken. And then what happens is like, maybe if I can help mom, maybe if I'm quiet, maybe mom will be okay. And there's this, that kind of energy gets put out. And what ends up happening is you develop an anxious attachment style and then you'll tend to attract women growing up that maybe have an avoidant attachment style, or you'll be addicted to people that aren't emotionally available for you. And notice, you know, remember your parents are doing the best they can with where they were. Both my parents are amazing parents. However, growing up, they're going through their stuff. My mom's dad died when she was real, when I was like a couple years old, 1 or 2 years old, and my mom lost 20 pounds. And I know she's going through a lot. So I'd imagine that at that time I was feeling what she was feeling. So it's about understanding that then I felt that lack, I felt that want, I felt that need. I would attract women that I felt like I could try to fix, 'cause that felt like subconsciously, if I could fix them, then I could also fix my relationship with the feminine. I could also fix my mom. Isn't that interesting? And the key to this is being aware that the want, the need that I have was there because it felt familiar, but also it was to cover up the shame that I felt around love. I felt a lot of shame around love. I felt shame for me being a certain way. Like I felt a lot of shame for, like I believed I was broken. I believed I wasn't good enough. And I would attract women that weren't fully choosing me. Why? Because I stopped originally choosing myself. That's the thing. A lot of this is going around abandonment. If we feel abandoned emotionally, physically, or physically growing up, then we'll tend to attract people into our life that are also reflecting that block back to us. That's one of the main blocks is abandonment, and our words are reflecting back what that is for us. Now, people that are felt emotionally or physically abandoned growing up, one of the main things they do is they originally, they abandoned themselves first. So I abandoned myself. I wasn't being the true authentic me. Even in relationships in the past, I can see that I wasn't being the most bold version of me. I was playing small. I was trying to fix other people. I was distracting myself from myself and what I really wanted to do. I also had a people pleaser mentality, and that people pleaser mentality had me trying to fix everybody else, ease tension, because growing up there was a lot of tension in my, my household. And if I could ease the tension, then what would happen is I would heal the family, I would heal everybody else. That was safe for me. All we're all trying to do is create safety in our lives. Safety so that we can feel safe and familiar emotions. Sometimes we've been through crazy childhood stuff, so the words we're using that are blocking love are reaffirming the safety of a lack of emotional availability or emotional abandonment. So one of the most powerful things that you can begin to do to open yourself up to love is to let go of the terminology. I need, I want, uh, the belief that all guys are the same, all women are the same, all women want to control me. Those are all beliefs that I had, that women wanted to control me. I had to, I had to like fight for my freedom, but I was addicted to fighting for my freedom because I was so used to it growing up. Isn't that the crazy thing? Is that these emotions feel familiar, so we keep creating them. As soon as I healed the relationship, my ex-stepmom left my life when I was 15, but years afterwards, I kept having people in my life that reflected the energy back from my ex-stepmom. So one thing I did is I had to forgive my ex-stepmom and heal that. Didn't mean I had to talk to her or anything, but I forgave her and understand that the reason she was so abusive was because she was abused growing up, and it helped me understand her a little bit more. Within 2 weeks of doing that, that manager that I used to have in women's shoes that was the same personality as my ex-stepmom, she got fired and it took her years to get her fired. So it's just a clear indication that reality is just a reflection of what you believe you deserve and what's familiar to you. Now, when we emotionally abandon ourselves, one of the first things we do is we— our word, we start giving up because we don't see it as important. We don't live in as much high integrity because we will change our own word, change our own integrity to make other people feel safe or to make other people feel a lack of tension. And when I started becoming aware of this, I became a boundary ninja. That was one of the first things I did. I was like, um, I remember I'd said yes to so many things that I didn't want to say yes to. I got kind of bitter towards certain friends when it really, it was like my fault that I'd never really said no before. And one thing I had to do is I had to start saying no and not feel guilty about it. I'm like, oh, I can say no to hanging out or to drive or to driving this far to doing this thing when I actually have other stuff to do. I mean, it was to the point to where I would drive like 10 hours away if I felt like I had to, just, I felt like I had to in order to make friends happy and stuff like that. That happened for a friend's birthday party once. I drove 10 hours away and I had to come. I had a photo shoot. With like a world-renowned photographer that was scheduled months out. I had to reschedule that. I had to reschedule a whole bunch of things so that I could go to a friend's birthday party because I just couldn't say fucking no. That's what's crazy to me. All I had to do is say, no, I can't do it. I still love you. We'll celebrate some other way. I couldn't do that. So I had that harsh, I had to kind of like look at myself in this way. And as I did, I realized that a lot of this stuff, this need, this want was codependent energy. That's what this was. I felt dependent on other people because if they could, like, and other people of easing their tension, because then I could feel safe. I knew that I was loved. It was also a worthiness thing, but realize the more you want love, the more you lack love. And remember this, the more you treat someone like a celebrity, the more they will treat you like a fan. This is something that, um, is like a quote that rings so true. If you felt like the more you've ever wanted someone, especially a specific person, the more they feel that energy off of you. That's why letting go is so damn powerful because when you let go, you let go of that resistant energy. You allow yourself then to be in a different state of energy to where it's like it's not attached. It means you're good already. One of the things for you being the true you to attract love to is for you to be living your purpose, doing what you love, following your passion, because that says that you are living according to your word. And I think that that's— that when I started living my purpose, I started feeling more confident. I started making videos on YouTube. It changed my energy and it attracted like people that were also doing what they love. You know, we attract people based on the values that we embody. And if we embody a value that says, I hate my job, but I still work it because I think that's all I'm worthy of, then we'll attract someone else that is also maybe working a job they don't like because that feels familiar. And then we'll bitch about it at the end of the day. Remember my old job, I would work like 40 hours a week. I'd get home, I would feel guilty about going to the gym because then I wasn't spending time with my girlfriend at the time. And I was like, we'd go out to eat once or twice a week. That was like, I also didn't have a crazy amount of money so I couldn't really even afford it. But also it was like, it was just so clear to me that so much of my life was spent working a job I hated on my off days I was just getting caught up in stuff. You know, I barely had time to do stuff for myself and then I started doing what I love and it's like I started valuing my own time more and it changed everything. And that's also because I was doing what I love and I was living according to that, like, uh, that standard. It made me much more attractive. So need and want comes from normally an abandonment wound that we may have attained growing up. And the key to this is looking at that and releasing the shame around it. And one of the ways we release shame is we realize that our mom's stuff, our dad's stuff growing up was their stuff, not ours. My mom going through emotional stuff with their dad dying growing up, that was her stuff. Didn't mean I wasn't worthy. My parents divorced when I was 5. Doesn't mean I'm not worthy and I'm broken. But as a 5-year-old, I literally, we literally as kids think it's our fault, but realize it's not your fault. Your parents' divorce was not your fault. Your dad or mom being emotionally unavailable or physically abandoning, it's not your fault. It's not your fault. It was something that they did. They were dealing with their own stuff and doesn't mean you have to, it doesn't mean it was right and all that, but it was something that happened. And as you understand it more, normally also this works in family lines. So their mom or dad was also emotionally unavailable. Then you realize, oh, I understand it more. I can accept it. Once you accept it, then you can do something with it and you can take responsibility for then giving yourself the emotions that you crave. I had to start validating myself. I had to start embodying the emotions that I wanted in order for me to then attract that love into my life. I think there's one more word, so we're going to do two more here. We're going to get a bonus one, one that you didn't even— you weren't even aware you're going to get. Or maybe I'll just title this video 7 Deadly Words. Okay. But know that it took on a life of its own as we started creating. Now this next word is your ex's name. Okay? If you are blaming an ex for a past relationship or you still are attached to them, that will block love from coming into your life more than anything else because you will not have energetic space and energetic room for allowing someone new in. I have a friend of mine right now that's going through this process of kind of doing the cat and mouse twin flame type game where they're going back and forth, back and forth, and she's not attracting new relationships or new dating potentials. Why? Because she's attached. She's attached to her ex or to the person she's like going back and forth with. But because of that, she's not allowing anything new in. Now, that's how it works. This is an energy dynamic game where it's like you have so much stuff in your closet, but unless you let go of some of the stuff from childhood, from high school, you let go of the stuff you're not wearing anymore, you're not gonna have room for anything new to come in. So you're literally not gonna attract new clothes. The same way it works with love. Literally for 2.5, 3 years with my past relationship with someone that's one, you know, one of my best friends, I was going back and forth for so long. But then what happened is I realized that we both realized that we weren't allowing anything new in because we were still attached. And then once I let, once we both let each other go, things happened very quickly. I then within weeks I started dating. And then like a month or two later there were new potentials and that's when I met Heather. It's crazy how quickly these things work when you let go. So what I would encourage you to do is to let go, to realize that the relationship served a purpose for you to become aware of different aspects of yourself, but to realize the more— the reason you're staying attached is probably because you're fighting for some familiar childhood patterns growing up. This ex, this person, Represents the childhood dynamics you had growing up, and because of that, you're fighting to keep that familiar, and therefore you're using their name a lot. You're thinking about them a lot. You may be blaming them, and because of that, you are also blocking love. Another thing I did is I would blame past relationships, uh, and I would— but here's the crazy thing. I was putting my power outside of myself by thinking, oh, if they would have just done this, if they would have done that, then everything would have been perfect. but I had to also realize that one of the reasons I was attracted to emotionally unavailable people was because I was emotionally unavailable. And I found that out when Heather, my girlfriend, came into my life because she's so emotionally available that it was like I had to get used to that kind of energy, that kind of nurturing. And then that was a whole other thing of vulnerability I had to go into. So that's another thing you wanna do is let that go. Now, one more word that I want you to look at is the word control. The word control, any trying to control any relationship dynamic will literally block love from your life. Control is like the plague in a way when it comes to love and relationship dynamics. Control is what we think we need to do in order to get what we want, but it's the opposite. Letting go is the way. Letting go of attachment, letting go of desire, letting go is actually the way this works with love. Control is a safety mechanism we've used to feel safe growing up that then we try to apply to love, but it just doesn't work. I tried to control like how often someone texts me back. It's all neediness and codependent stuff. But letting go of control is key. And the key to letting go of control is letting go of codependency. Now, one of the most powerful videos and episodes I have ever made is on codependency. I've been blown away by people's response of this and how much it's helped people. We go deep on how to let go of I need, how to let go of I want, how to let go so that you can be in your own frame. and I believe this video will change your life more than anything else. And if you watch this video here, you let me know what you think and you'll see what I'm saying. So watch that video that will help you build on everything that we're talking about here so that you have the most magnetic energy you can possibly imagine. In this episode, I'm gonna be showing you the cure to codependency, how to never be needy again. I'm gonna share with you also my journey